#<- baby i'm so sorry you had to go through that

[m00nl1ghts1vt]

Positive - Chris Sturniolo

Pairings - bf!Chris x fem!reader Summary - When the whole house comes down with the flu, you have a hard time recovering which makes Nick jokingly plant the idea of two pink lines in your head. Warnings - established relationship, mentions of abortion, angst, mentions of pregnancy, fluff, crying 🥲 W/c - 1591 A/n - Hey!! Sorry I haven't posted all week 😭 Still working on getting into my inbox, it won't let me see anything on my phone or computer☹️ Also I just want to say thank you sooo much to everyone who has been interacting, I'm almost at 200 followers!!🫣 Masterlist Current Series - City of Love Top Liked - Pierced

Tears prick at your eyes as you look at the pregnancy test in your hands, the word 'pregnant' etched across the little screen. Your chest heaves up and down, and your heart thumps so fast you feel like it could shoot right out of your body. It was nearly two in the morning, your boyfriend was still awake playing a game on his PC, so you knew you had to keep your panic at a minimum.

The last few weeks, the whole house had been fighting off the flu - first Matt, then Nick, finally hitting you and Chris at the same time. Luckily, it cleared up quickly for the boys but not so much for you. Your sore throat and stuffy nose were gone but you could shake the constant state of nausea you were in ever since the seasonal stomach flu took over. Earlier in the day you were telling Nick about how you still felt sick to your stomach, but your other symptoms were gone, and he wittily came back with, “imagine if you’re pregnant.” Nick’s half sarcastic joke made your mind wonder. It wasn’t like you to not keep track of your period, but with the last couple months being jam packed that it slipped your mind. Pulling up your Flo app and noticing you were five days late; you made sure to add a pregnancy test to the weekly grocery order that the boys put you in charge of earlier in the day.

Somewhat in denial, you pushed off the idea of taking the pregnancy test all day, not telling a soul because you were sure it’d come out negative. That’s until the possibility of the test being positive ate away at your brain. 1:48AM and here you were - on the bathroom floor with your knees pulled to your chest, wide eyes, and trembling hands. Squeezing your eyes so tight that you feel a slight burning sensation when you open them. You hold your breath, hoping and praying the test you pinched between your fingers somehow magically changed from positive to negative, but you were wrong. It was positive.

Hot tears stream down your face, a small sob escapes your lips, and you quickly slap a hand over your mouth. You were in the hallway bathroom which was probably the worst place to have a private moment, it was the bathroom all the boys shared. Mentally scolding yourself for not using the half bathroom in the front of the house, you pull yourself to your feet and turn on the sink to splash water in your face. The raw reality smacking you, knowing only you and your baby knew of its existence made your head spin to the point you were dizzy. Despite rarely using protection, pregnancy wasn’t something you and Chris had talked about. He never talked about the future. If you were being completely honest, the dynamic your relationship with Chris had been more of a ‘go with the flow’ type of vibe. The idea of walking in Chris’s bedroom and telling him that you were pregnant with his child made your gut churn. You grip the countertop tight, taking a few more deep breaths in an attempt to fight off the nausea and lightheadedness taking over your body. When the feeling weighs down on you, becoming too much for you to handle, you drop to your knees, flipping the toilet lid up, and emptying your guts once again. You had been puking off sporadically all day long, and you lost count of how many times you had thrown up hours ago.

Continuing to heave violently, you drown out the sounds of Chris calling your name through the bathroom door, “babe? You okay?” And when you don’t answer him, only responding with hurling sounds, he decides to enter the bathroom anyways. Chris’s flu, along with both of his brothers, had been long gone, so it worried him that you weren’t recovering like normal. You look up at him, not fully processing the moment, the positive pregnancy test was sitting on the counter in plain view for him to see. He keeps his eyes locked on you, shutting the door behind him, “we got to take you to the emergency room in the morning, baby.” He shoots you a sympathetic look before hooking his arms around yours and helping you to your feet.

You suck in a breath as he engulfs you in a gentle hug. “Chris,” your voice barely above a whisper, still breathing heavily while your heart thumps violently in your chest. Chris rubs his hand up and down your back, soothing you more than he knew. He plants a kiss on the top of your head, “you need me to get you anything?”

Letting your eyes fall to the test, you let out another soft sob. It makes Chris pull away, confusion etched across his face, “what's wrong?” He asks you, placing each of his hands on your shoulders, concern laced through his voice. You stare into his blue eyes, letting them seize your momentary sadness. You let your eyes fall to the counter, not being able to tear them away from the pregnancy test. Once Chris notices, you can feel his body tense up and his eyes widen like a deer in headlights, “what the fuck is that?”

The harsh reality of his words hit you like a freight train, making you wish he didn't know. You step away, crossing your arms over your chest, and not daring to say a word. “Fuck man,” you watch as he tugs a hand through his hair, picking the test up and squinting in disbelief. “No fucking way!” he spits out in shock, his voice louder than before. Chris tosses the pregnancy test in the sink, placing both hands on the countertop as he leans over. He looked like he just got the worst news of his life.

To you, his actions were confirmation he wanted nothing to do with you or this baby. You panic, pushing past him, slinging open the door, and footing it back to his bedroom. Chris’s feet are quickly in tow behind you once he hears the soft sobs and sniffles you let out while trying to escape his pent-up rage. Finally in his bedroom, you attempt to swing the door shut behind you, but Chris intervenes, pushing it open with his hand. “Y/n,” he sounds quietly, the angry Chris was no longer present, but you didn’t care. His initial reaction had you shook to your core. It’s not like you expected him to be jumping for joy, but you wanted him to be supportive and not flip out like he did.

Now in Chris’s closet, you shove clothes into one of your spare duffle bags, not letting your eyes meet him. He has his body pressed against the door frame, blocking your only exit, “you’re not leaving.” You wipe your tear-stained cheeks and look up at him, “you don’t want me here.”

Chris’s face contorts with a mixture of frustration and empathy, he takes a deep breath before sitting on the floor with you, “I want you here, baby, I do. I'm just- I don't know.” Your face was swollen, and your vision was blurred from crying, but you could make out the pained expression etched across his face. A few tears slip from his eyes, and he wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you closer and planting another kiss on your forehead as he rubs your back in a soothing manner. Anywhere with Chris was your safe place, knowing your boyfriend brought you so much comfort, you didn’t care about breaking down in his arms. You let the sobs erupt from your chest as he hugs you tight, “shhh, we're gonna be okay.”

“I-I’m so sorry Chris,” you choke out through your tears. Chris pressed his cheek to the top of your head, running his fingers through the ends of your hair, “none of this is your fault.” His soft tone relaxes you, helping you push your worries to the back of your head. Chris guides you through deep breaths, wiping the leftover tears from your cheeks once you’re calm enough. Letting his hands drop to your lap, “whatever you want to do, I’m here,” he reassures you. You suck in another scattered breath, nodding a few times before pulling the words from your throat, “I can’t get an abortion, Chris.”

“Then you don’t have to, Y/n,” he eases while rubbing a hand up your thigh, “it doesn’t matter what option you choose, I’m not going anywhere.” Throughout your relationship with Chris, you had never seen him with this much emotion. A few tears slip down his cheeks and his lip bottom quivers before he pulls you into another hug, this time tighter than before. Tangling his hand in your hair, “I love you.” You strangle out a laugh, “I love you," knowing how vulnerable the two of you looked on the floor of his closet, bawling your eyes out at 2AM.

In a way, the revelation broke through a comfort barrier the two of you always held onto so tightly. Chris being scared to commit and you having a hard time with expressing what you actually wanted from him. The thought of starting a family together freaked you and Chris out to no end, but both of you were ready for the blessing placed upon you.

He pulls back abruptly before pressing a kiss to your lips, “we’re gonna be great fucking parents.”

🏷️ - @lvrsturniolo @thepubeburgler @unknvhx @m11rx @ribread03 @emely9274 (if anyone else wants on my tag list just let me know!!)

[amazinglyashy]

hi! i was wondering if i can request lads boys comforting their s/o bc their cat has passed. my baby passed today and i’m grieving really hard. thank you and have an amazing day🫶🏻

Moving this one up immediately in my box just to express my condolences. Your baby was very loved, I'm sure, and I hope you get through this tough time with care <3 I'm sorry for your loss. It's a tough time, regardless of who you're losing. My partner's grandpa passed a couple years back and I remember us crying, laughing and bowling, crying again, and talking a lot. Heck, I went to a craft store right after I heard the news and wandered around for two hours without any goal. I think I bought lolipop sticks. Take care love <3 You'll get through this. I know it's hard.

LaDS men when your pet cat has passed away

Xavier -

Since he lives so close by, your baby was his baby too, so he's devastated. Not equally so, he knows you spent more time with them, and you had them long before you had met him, but still- the pain exists.

The both of you are a bundle of blankets for a long while, just lying in the comfort and going through the both of your phones as you look for every single photo or video that has your cat in it, even just a little bit.

Lots of tears, but lots of laughs as well.

Everything is clear and apparent with every single memory the two of you go through- every little quirk your cat had, every little habit they had-

You both have a really nice time just talking about your cat, and any of the goofy mischief they used to get up to.

Of course you cry, and of course Xavier holds you through it. He knows how hard this is for you, and he knows it'll pass.

But until then, he's got you.

He's always got you.

Zayne -

He may be pragmatic to an extreme sometimes, but when it comes to grieving, he knows how hard it can be on the human psychic.

Not to mention on someone like you, who's already been through enough.

He'll definitely ask you if you want a hug, and if the answer is yes, he'll hold you, squeezing you so snugly and for so long that surely his muscle memory doesn't know a different position anymore.

Warm tea or cocoa, his old cardigan on your shoulders, pillows and blankets surrounding you on the couch, and just…

A lot of care.

If you ask him for any opinions or advice, he probably won't be able to give it to you. He doesn't want to risk anything coming out abrasive when you're still so tender, so he'll settle for condolences and anything comforting he can think of.

"I know it hurts. And you can try as you might, but the hole they left won't ever manage to be blocked out. All you can do is keep going, and hold their memory close."

Sylus -

Deep breath, it's going to be alright.

Loss is definitely something he's familiar with- and it's partially why he doesn't have anyone of his own. Mephisto may have a personality, but he's also mechanical. There's no way for him to disappear, because every bit of data in him gets saved, just in case.

But there's also no way your cat will disappear either, because Sylus has saved every memory of her, to make sure you will always have something should this day arrived.

He just didn't expect it to come so soon.

Doesn't matter what job he has, it's left to Luke and Kieran. He's by your side to care for you in whatever capacity you may need. He takes a lot of initiative, but he also asks you a lot of questions too. He doesn't want to risk making you uncomfortable, and he knows you're extra tender right now.

A lot of physical affection if that's what you need, and a lot of ideas to help you through it- whether he takes you out somewhere to help distract you from the pain, or goes through old memories with you to help you grieve through it, he'll do anything.

For as long as you may need.

Rafayel -

He hated cats.

Except for this one.

That was partially your fault, but also partially the darned cat's fault for being such a love.

He's devastated, both for you, and for himself.

He'll hug you- kiss you. Anything he can think of that usually cheers you up, even though he knows there's really nothing that's going to help right now.

He's been there, he's experienced loss. He knows what you're going through, and unfortunately- he knows that also means there's not really any helping it.

Someday when you're ready- could be in a month, could be three years from now, it doesn't matter at all him- he'll make you probably one of the favorite gifts you'll ever receive from him.

It's a portrait of your past baby, flowing full of life and color with eyes that sparkle almost as well as theirs did back when they were still around.

Almost.

And sometimes, 'almost' is more than enough to help ease the pain.

[kismetlotts]

Kinktober 🎃 day seven: Jealousy!

cw: jealous Simon Riley, sex at a party, dub con, hair pulling, rough sex, use of being owned, mentions of male masturbation, mentions of cumming untouched, reader gets fucked stupid, use of instagram and people messaging the reader, filming a video/ pornography?, creampie

Simon Riley who isn't a jealous boyfriend. So what you're absolutely drop dead fucking gorgeous and gain every males attention in the room, he didn’t care. He wasn't going to let their gazes get to him, how low do you think of him? You weren’t theirs, they didn’t own you- he did.

One strong, muscular, arm draped over your shoulder as his eyes locked on a man across the room, lips puckered with irritation as he sipped from his beer at your friend’s Halloween party. They knew better than to look at you, they knew better than to even think about competing against him. He’d kill theme he’d enjoy it too.

Simon Riley who isn't a jealous boyfriend but has to blink away his emotions when you walk over to him. Hips swaying and tits bouncing in your revealing little Halloween outfit- the outfit he couldn't get enough of. You had posted a photo on your story once you'd arrived; Simon, of course, being behind the camera, making sure your body look divine and your pretty little face impeccable.

His sexy little girl had to look her best on camera. Your red lipsticked lip quivering in fear as you held out your phone to him, his eyes scanning the messages some sorry excuse of a man had sent you.

'My dick would look so good inside you.' Was written, followed by a 'I'm fucking my fist to your photos.' It was perverted, pathetic and overall just sad. Simon could almost see why they’d sent that, he would’ve done the same have you had not been dating.

Who wouldn't think thoughts like that? Who wouldn't stroke their cock to the sight of you, so innocent and lovely. Simons dick hardened as he remembered the first time you’d met. Your eyes alluring him, having him cumming in his jeans just from one look, he had to keep you for himself after that.

His hand grabbed your small one, the roughness of his scared palm contrasting between your moisturised hands. Smooth soft skin against his textured one. He lead you upstairs in this guys home, walking into an empty bedroom before circling around the edge of the bed, signalling for you to join him there.

Upon entering the unoccupied room, your shifted in the air, high heels clacking against the floor as you stood hesitantly, unsure. Swallowing down the caution in your voice, your eyes locked on to Simon.

"What are we doing?" But he just continued to instruct you over, grinning playfully. You sat on the bed beside him and before you could process anything he pushed you down against the duvet, grabbing you by the hair and laying you on your front. Hand guiding downwards to rip your thong off before grabbing your phone and pressing record.

His cock slammed into your pussy hard, hips thrusting faster than ever as you choked out a sob, tears pouring from your eyes as Simon used you, fucked and fucked you before he spoke up.

Voice dark and husked, slightly strained from how good he was feeling as he brought your pussy into shot, filming the way his cock slid inside and fit perfectly. Capturing your skimpy Halloween costume practically falling off of your body too.

"O’s cunt is this?" He growled. Words sprawled uselessly from your lips: too lost in the pleasure. The only thing you could mutter being a 'you' before returning back to your whimpering and drooling mess. Simon couldn’t contain his laugh, slowing the pace down just a little. The slap of his balls hitting you as his thrusts calmed. The fist buried deep in your hair clutched as he yanked you back, face facing the ceiling as you breathed heavily.

"Say it. Tell him who owns this cunt, baby." And you cried, managing to say Simon through the ecstasy you were feeling, so lost and drowning in pleasure to care anymore. You didn't care why he was fucking you, how he was fucking you or what he was going on your phone- you just wanted him to keep going and not to slow down until you finish all over his cock.

Simon flipped the camera around, capturing himself a redden cheeked, lidded eyed mess with sweat droplets falling from his forehead, panning the camera down once more to show his muscular body thrusting in and out one last time.

"That's right, it’s mine. My tight pussy- my wet hole to fuck. Oh it’s all mine- you’re mine baby. She’s fucking mine." Before ending the video, spilling deep into you, coating your insides white before sending it off. Brown eyes flickering up to watch as your body melts, the warmth and comfort of what just happened casting a fast sleep over you.

His hand rubbed soothing circles over your back, watching as you shifted to get comfortable, smiling down at you protectively. He quickly opened the messages one last time, not feeling fully satisfied, typing something quickly before shutting the phone off and throwing it somewhere on the bed.

Oh and mate, feel free to go fuck yourself as much as you want to this video. Because you will never ever be in my position. Never.

[sundew199]

Birthday present

a/n: just smth cute to celebrate Zoro's birthday ♡

tags: Roronoa Zoro x f!reader, fluff, dad!zoro, family dynamics, post-canon

His hands shook as he wiped them from on the sides of his pants, clammy and moist from the nervous sweat he had broken out into as he waited.

It'd been a couple of hours since he received word that you'd gone into labor, caught up in a class and doing his best to rush back to the compound where the two of you lived. The whole day had been a mess, Zoro not anticipating you'd be close to delivering when he agreed to teach a class halfway across the island almost a year ago. Oh well, he can't go back and change the past, all he could do now was apologize and make up for it somehow.

"Everything went smoothly."

Not even hearing the door to the bedroom open, let alone spot the doctor slipping out of the room, snapping Zoro's restless thoughts back to the present. The man looked kind and forgiving, features creasing soft in a reassuring smile as he patted Zoro's arm.

"I'll give you all the time you need, congratulations."

Zoro barely smiled at the doctor as he turned down the hall away from the bedroom Zoro stood outside of. There shouldn't be any reason why he was nervous, right? I mean this wasn't a surprise, sort of planned and wanted so he should just go in and forget about everything swirling in his head. But his stomach flipped and churned and he wished he knew why.

Well. He can't stand out here for the rest of his life.

Slowly pulling back the shoji, slipping inside, Zoro just about melted seeing you cradle a small bundle in your arms, paired with the brightest and yet most tired smile he's seen on you.

"Hey." Falling to his knees beside the futon, grasping the back of your head and placing a kiss on your cheek. "I'm so sorry, I tried to get here as fast as I could."

A soft hand came to silence whatever else might've come out of his mouth next, gently laughing and kissing his cheek back, making the unease in his veins simmer into nothing.

"It's okay, this was kind of unexpected, for everyone."

Zoro cumbersomely laughed, pressing his forehead to yours and then following it with a kiss, reassured to know you weren't upset with him for missing the birth of his first child. You began to scoot over to make room for him, adjusting the baby in your arms and giving Zoro a brief glance. Shit he felt so emotional, a lump rising in his throat and finding no way to make it go away.

Slowly your hand moved the loose blanket swaddled around the baby out of the way so Zoro could see them properly. They were sleeping soundly in the comfort of your arms, it almost didn't look or feel real that he was a father now. He'd hope the realization would've set in sooner, but at the same time the overwhelming sensation coursing through him felt other worldly.

"Can I?" Asking nervously, watching you break out into a small laugh at his question to hold his own child, but Zoro was nervous and it couldn't be helped.

"Of course."

The exchange felt like it was in slow motion, Zoro something of a giant to this new life and instantly on pins and needles when the baby was placed in his arms. Moving as carefully as he could while sitting on the edge of the futon, Zoro looked at you with misty eyes, not quiet crying but overflowing with joy.

"It's a boy by the way."

Hearing you whisper the sweet words and smiling even harder, looking back down again at the baby and adjusting his hold to where he could move the blanket further away from their face. His son made little faces at the adjustments, worrying Zoro for a moment but calming when he continued to sleep.

"I meant to get you a proper gift, but I hope this is okay for now."

Quicker than he could process, Zoro was twisting to look at you fully, uncertainty taking over in his expression.

"Gift? What are you talking about?"

Your sweet laugh confused him further, wondering what you were talking about. Subtly, you scooted closer, hooking your chin over his shoulder and throwing an arm around the other, pressing your cheek to his as you both admired the sleeping baby in his arms.

"It's your birthday today."

Oh.

Oh-

Zoro slightly turned his head with wide eyes, the reminder dawning on him in that moment and suddenly he felt emotions he couldn't find proper words for. His birthday wasn't anything he cared much for, just another year getting older, but he did like the excuse of getting to drink as a form of celebration. He'd been so focused on you and the dojo that his birthday didn't even cross his mind once.

"Shit it is isn't it?"

Lips vibrated on his cheek as you kissed him with another laugh, running your fingertips along his shoulder and humming peacefully.

"Mhm. You don't mind sharing a birthday do you?" Asking with a bit of humor in your tone, pulling the corner of Zoro's mouth into a firmer smile.

"No," Moving to fully turn and face you now, getting himself properly adjusted on the futon next to you, checking in on his son still fast asleep. "Probably just made my birthdays more memorable from here on out."

With his free hand, Zoro cupped one side of your face, locking you into a deep kiss, stroking his thumb over your cheek bone when he pulled away.

"It's not going to bother me, but we never know how he'll feel about it when he's older." Motioning down towards the newborn baby with his chin, breathily chuckling at his own comment.

"I guess we'll just have to wait and see." Leaning over to kiss the top of your son's head, proceeding to give Zoro a quick kiss as well before curling up into his side carefully, running your hand across the soft newborn hair with your fingers.

[newtkelly]

Not to word vomit on you but I can't stop thinking about Oliver wanting a love story like Tarlos and how it all accidentally lined up.

Knowing that Carlos and TK were about to move in, and then Carlos made that romantic gesture and TK got scared because it was, "too good to be true."

Carlos is left, confused, puzzled and nursing a broken-heart but still just as in love. What do you mean that TK and Carlos saw a future together, one got scared at that prospect and left before Carlos was the one to leave??

What do you mean that happened after Oliver said he wanted Bucktommy to have a love story like Tarlos; where it was always going to be them?

Then you consider Oliver saying that we might see Tommy and Buck interact during a call and it'll be awkward and who can't help but think of TK and Carlos running into the furniture store and seeing each other for the first time in weeks.

Anyways, sorry to be delusional in your ask box. I'm deep within the Tarlos trenches so this is all starting to look eerily familiar lmao (it could also be Tim is out of ideas, which is most likely the case)

Please feel free to word vomit on me always, I live for it.

Receiving this ask has actually prompted me to share some thoughts that I’ve held back from sharing, just because I wasn’t sure if it was worth it to throw more speculation into the void. But this message is so lovely, and I agree with it so much and so… okay I will share some of my mixed bag of thoughts about this whole situation.

Firstly, I adore Tarlos and LS (even if I don’t post about either much), TK is my baby, and the interesting thing about them for me is that I wound up caring for them more AFTER they broke up and got back together. If Buck and Tommy’s story is formatted as a rom-com, TK and Carlos are a tragicomedy. TK, the heartbroken recovering addict thrust into an entirely new city, a new career, who doesn’t want to let himself get too close to something good because he is misery incarnate. Carlos, the hopeful hopeless romantic who sees TK and doesn’t see something that needs fixing, but someone who his love could help heal. It’s such a gorgeous story, and the symmetry of both characters shockingly losing a parent in a tragic way is painfully beautiful. I LOVE their love story.

That brings me to Oliver and Tim’s comments. Throughout the Buck and Tommy relationship, my belief that this would be Buck’s final relationship only ever wavered twice. The first time was in the immediate aftermath of their first date (I spent the whole episode thinking that Tommy was actually reintroduced to kick off the bi awakening plotline and Buck was not acquiring a boyfriend) and the second time was towards the tail end of the summer hiatus when I legitimately began to doubt Lou would want to come back given everything that transpired. Other than that, I had full faith that this was it, this was Buck getting off the “hamster wheel”—Tim’s words, not mine.

I had confidence for a few reasons. 1 – the story was always handled with care onscreen and gave us no reason to think they weren’t going to work out. 2 – the chemistry was insane, and I knew it couldn’t just be me because an entire fandom was born. Tim and tptb must have seen what we saw. 3 – the supplementary information funneled to us through articles and Tim’s social media, literally up until post-8x06 never seemed to indicate that their relationship was headed in this direction. A big part of that was the comparison to Tarlos.

In order to protect myself (should I name the list of shows, movies, couples that I’ve fixated on that wound up playing out in dissatisfying ways?), I am awfully pessimistic. The post-episode interviews, articles, + hearing a bit from LFJ and OS has me wondering if this was some mass hallucination. Did we truly cling to something good and blow it up, run with it? Was this always the plan? I’ve wondered if because S7 was so short and S8 required that other characters get the spotlight first/other stories needed to be told and wrapped, and if because of production and scheduling and whatever external reasons, did their relationship wind up having a longer life than was ever intended. Were they ever supposed to make it to six months? Were they ever supposed to make it past the fucking wedding? I have been asking myself this stuff a lot. Alternatively, did something happen that made them want to or have to part ways with LFJ? So many questions, and I’m not sure we’ll ever know.

But… then there’s the delusional side of me, and the reason I haven’t totally abandoned hope is because when I was watching 8x06 live, EVERYTHING in me told me that this is a necessary section of the rom-com formula. Even the call-backs throughout the episode made me feel like the writers are so painfully aware, and that the narrative wants these characters to be together (Miceli’s, Abby, basketball, going to the movies, calling an uber, the loft kitchen, “you’re not ready”)—the motifs were absolutely popping off. I did not think it was the end when the episode ended. I wondered when and how they would find their way back to each other to fulfill the rom-com genre, but what I did NOT expect was to open social media and see articles framing this as the end. I wasn’t surprised when I found out who wrote the articles, and listen—if they bait one side of the fandom, can’t they bait the other? I still have some hope, because at the end of the day, anything can happen with network television. Maybe this is all part of the plan, and the interviews should be taken with a grain of salt. I just don’t know.

Interviews with Tim and Oliver from day one positioned the Buck and Tommy relationship as a queer love story devoid of trauma. Okay, well… huh. From where I was sitting, there was A TON of explicitly queer trauma exposed in 8x06. Their “hurdle” is tied utterly and completely to queerness. Tommy runs because he is a gay man who doesn’t trust that his bisexual boyfriend should “settle” for him, and who would rather be alone than heartbroken, and if that truly is the last of Tommy, it has to be one of the coldest and cruelest exits we’ve ever seen on this show. Do they simply not realize how deeply traumatized both characters come off in that episode, or is it all part of the plan? If the interviews positioning this as the permanent end of bucktommy should be taken at face value, shouldn’t the other interviews that position them as a rom-com (with the formulaic third act breakup, boils and all) be taken as the truth as well? If there was some misinterpretation, why hasn’t Tim said anything—he clearly knows a lot of fans were hurt by what they watched. He must have seen the outrage—why radio silence? Did we truly blow this out of proportion? Are the wheels coming off behind the scenes? I need a tell-all at this point lol

Thank you for the lovely ask, I’ve been sitting with these thoughts all week so this was a good excuse to finally articulate them. <3

[beef-brisket]

Lucifer ran his hand through his hair to make sure it wasn't singed. Bless the father it seemed to be fine.

Lucifer: Okay- we'll keep that on the back burner just- try to not wave your hands around.

Lucifer smiles and holds Adam's hands. He's not entirely sure how the whole holy light thing works, but he'll figure it out another time.

Adam: Okay! S-Sorry.

Lucifer: It's fine! You just took me by surprise, that's all! Okay- how about we head back inside.

Adam nodded and followed Lucifer inside. He was hugging his arm. With the height difference, it was making Lucifer's shoulder ache.

Lucifer listened as Adam told him about his day. It was in Eden. Lucifer actually found it comforting hearing about Eden, like it only just happened.

Adam: Luci! Did you know one of your creations got put into Eden?

Lucifer looked up: No, I didn't. Which one?

Adam: It's adorable- it mainly stays on the lake- and the babies are so small- and it has wings, like you- like us! Lilly and I called it a duck!

Lucifers eyes widened, he didn't know Adam AND Lilith named the duck. He assumed it was Adam- but he'd learned a lot of things about Lilith these past few years that nothing surprised him anymore.

Lucifer: Oh- that's amazing, Adam! I'm glad they made it past judging!

He cri get remembering how many of his creations didn't make it. He had to make at least fifteen changes to the ducks design before it could even go to the council.

They walked down the stairs towards the lobby, not noticing the shadow watching them.

((It's been a while since we've had brat!Alastor lol))

In Your Head

Lucifer sighed as he held the guitar that he took from the battlefield. It was Adams guitar and aside from a few scratches it looked like it was in perfect condition.

Lucifer: I'm going to miss you old friend.

Though, was friend the right word? Adam was so much more than a friend to Lucifer.

Watching him get stabbed like that had been very hard.

Was it though?

Lucifer snapped his head up, eyes wide as he looked at the angel he thought to be long dead, his helmet gone and golden blood staining his robe.

Lucifer: A-Adam? What, how are you here!?

Adam smiled at him and it was too sweet for the Adam of today the one that he turned into. But not the Adam he knew in Eden.

Adam: Oh come on Luci, you're smarter than that. No one comes back from an angelic blade to the heart. Thanks for that by the way.

That nickname sliced through his core, he hadn't heard it in so long he almost forgot that's what Adam used to call him.

Lucifer: You're not real are you?

Adam: Bingo baby! Awww, it's actually sweet. You miss me so much that I actually take up space in that head of yours.

Lucifer: Why are you so..... Nice? But look like that?

Adam shrugged and moved to sit down beside him: Probably because you don't really remember what I looked like in Eden, but more how I acted. So you just kinda...... Married the past with the present. I don't know boo, it's your mind.

Lucifer felt Adam touch his hair as if to tuck it behind his ear, but since he wasn't real the hand just went right through him.

Lucifer: I don't get it, you weren't like this in Eden.

Adam: Maybe I'm a version you've always wanted.

That made sense in a way.

Lucifer: Why would I want a polite slightly flirty version of you?

Adam smiled gently and leaned in: Come on Luci, you know why. Stop lying to yourself.~

His breath hitched in his throat, sure he had always thought about what could have been between them but...... It was always just a fantasy.

Adam: A fantasy you could have made real.~

Lucifer: You didn't want me.

Adam: How would you know? You never asked or tried. You could have had me all to yourself.

Lucifer: I could have?

Adam: Yeah. But now you never will.

@fanofstuff01 @beef-brisket

[stxrslut]

SWEET RELIEF ˚୨୧⋆.

summary;  john b has been holding out all day, so when you tell him to wait another few minutes before you have sex, he decided not to. the consequences can be faced when you come to them

content; piss

“johnbee,” you speak happily against his lips as he kisses you greedily. his hand grips at your ass and pulls you down onto him. you can tell what he wants. “woah, wait a minute,” you giggle at his urgency, “I gotta go pee first.” 

“uh uh.” he murmurs, “no.. stay here.. c’mon. stay here.” he urges, pulling you back down when you try to climb off of him.  

you giggle again, “jeez, have you got no patience?” you sit up, grinning down at him. he’s hard as a rock, you can feel it under you. you can’t really blame him, he woke up horny, he was horny all day, he’s horny now. you’d had things to do all day, now is the first chance you’ve had to attend to him.

you’re both on the couch, the sun is setting through the window, creating a natural dim in light, really setting the mood in stone.

“I have been waiting hours!” he smiles, letting his head flop back in drama, “you’re really going to make me wait longer? really baby? I do so much for you.” 

he sits up again, grabbing you and kissing on your neck with great affection. you laugh again, god, who knew your boyfriend could be so needy. “one minute john b. one minute!” 

he doesn’t release his grip, “no.. stay.. c’mon mama please.” oh, he did that. he’s doing that. he used the name and now he’s looking up at you with those stupid big puppy dog eyes that he uses so rarely. 

you sigh wearily, “fine, I’ll stay. but if I pee on you then you only have yourself to blame.” you joke. it’s meant as a complete joke, you’re not even desperate. the possibility that you might actually pee barely occurs to you at this point in time.

john b grins, leaning back and beginning to undo his pants to reveal tented boxers, and when he pulls those down it reveals his dick. thick and veiny, he looks ready to nut already, the tip glossy and visibly sensitive.

you smile and lower down with his help. he lets out a guttural groan of appreciation, head falling back on his pillow and eyes rolling. he’d been needing this all day, the poor guy. 

“ohh john b,” you groan as you begin to move your hips. it feels good for you too, he is huge after all, and you would be lying if you said that extra bit of pressure in your bladder isn’t helping. 

it goes as it always does, you start out strong, you ride till your heart's content, feeling every bit of pleasure and giving him every bit of it back. as you go on he has to start helping you out, you’re getting tired. 

his hands are on your hips, rocking you back and forth as you keep your hands on his chest to support yourself sitting up. there is so much pleasure coursing through you, but there’s also something else. 

a growing pressure in your bladder, one that surely wouldn’t be there if you’d actually gone to the bathroom before starting like you normally do. as it gets bigger and more desperate you really do try to keep the need in, not wanting to cut this moment short. 

unfortunately you feel as though you can’t wait, “john b stop.. I'm sorry.. I need to pee.” you try to slow yourself to a stop, but it’s hard with his hands so firm on your hips, making you move whether you like it or not. he's so much stronger than you, you really can't fight it.

“uh uh,” he grunts, not breaking the gaze that he’s making right into your eyes, brows furrowed in concentration and deep feeling, “you can wait. m’nearly done.” 

“seriously john b.. I’m gonna pee..” this has all taken a quick turn, you’re suddenly filled with anxiety and desperation to run off right now and relieve yourself in private. 

“then do it.” he says bluntly, still not stopping his movements, “if you’re so desperate then you can do it right here.” 

oh god. you can feel it coming. it’s almost like his words motivated your body to become even more in need of relief. you try to hold it off, you really do. but at the end of the day, he told you to do it. 

your face scrunches up as you finally allow yourself to relax. immediately you feel the warm liquid trickling down your legs. with the relaxation of your muscles brings the ability for you to also have another type of release, one more pleasurable. 

so there you are, with a newfound burst of energy, grinding your hips down as you piss all over your boyfriend's dick. it’s disgusting, but in that erotic kind of way that makes it the hottest thing ever. 

john b cums too, shooting a load up inside of you. his face furrows in pleasure for a moment before he exhales heavily, recovering from his climax at the same time as you. 

no matter how gross that was, you have to admit, it was some fucking good sex.

[lanadelreyscokewhor3]

LIKE A LOVE SONG- JOSH WASHINGTON

pairing: best friend!josh x fem!reader

word count- noo idea yet... writing this rn

summary: you and josh have been best friends for years, and the crush youve had on him hasnt subsided. things are all fine and dandy, until one night, the cat is pulled out of the bag...

warnings: implied SMUT, hella dirty talk, voygerism, dry humping, josh being a huge tease, pet names, some mocking, reader and josh are intoxicated, biting, etc etc

notes: hey so i need this man sexually! thats it thats all, im gonna open my account up to write for more fandoms and hop around:) just testing out the waters with this one

"josh we are sooo gonna get caught.." you slurred, hiccuping with a giggle as he tugged your arm, pulling you down the empty hallway, leaving your scattered friendgroup behind in the abyss.

a glint was in his eye as he looked back at you, full of mischief and hunger, and you couldn't help but bat your eyelashes at him. he was so dreamy it was making you swoon.

you had always thought he was beautiful- like a dream come alive. ever since he had accidently bumped into you during freshman year of college, you had be under his trance.

"shit, shit i'm so sorry, i shouldve watched where i was going. are you okay?" he had asked as he quickly bent down to help you gather your spilled papers. it was straight out of a chick flick, and you had finally felt like the main character instead of the extra.

he made you feel so special, always making flirty comments (though he did that with everyone), and giving you looks that had your head spinning.

tonight was no different.

the booze in your system made you extra giddy, and you felt his grip tighten as the two of you neared an empty bedroom down the hall.

not a doubt had passed through your mind when josh asked if you wanted to escape from the group for a while- clearly a bit intoxicated, but still stable enough to make a coherent decision. not in a million years would you pass up a chance to be alone with him.

"isn't that what makes it so much more fun?" he cooed, tugging you into the empty room, slamming the door behind you with a whoosh. without a second to gather your breath he had pinned you back against the door, hand darting out to turn the lock.

"do you actually-" you hiccuped nervously. "-wanna do something with me? do you wanna have sex?" you giggled, your bluntness making him laugh.

"yes, i wanna have sex with you. i have for years. is that okay?"

your eyes widened. did this man just say for years?

"oh."

he bit his lip, eyes roaming down your body, stopping to admire every trance from under your fitted clothes. "you gonna let me fuck you? or are you too scared chris is gonna wanna join in?"

"oh shut up."

he smirked, breath hot and heavy on your skin as he placed a soft kiss on your collarbone, nipping it with his teeth enough to make you hiss in shock.

"he does, cause you're so sexy. like a porn star. you have such a tight bod. wonder if your pussy is just as tight."

his dirty talk had your face heating, brain turning to mush as you moaned, leaning into his touch.

"you know how much i've wrapped my hands around my cock wishinng it was you? too many times." you squealed as he bit down on your neck, hard, hard enough to make a mark for anyone with a set of eyes to see, but you didnt care.

"j-josh fuck i-"

"whats up baby? need some cock to make you think straight? you've been giving me those pretty googly eyes all night, thinking i haven't noticed. so naive." he cooed as you ran your fingers through his hair, back arching into his touch as his large hands traveled down to your thighs before swooping you up so you clung wrapped around his torso.

"you're so fuckin hot. makes me so hard just thinking of you."

you rutted against him, sighing at the friction it caused, sending shocks down your spine stright to your core. his lips found yours, teeth and tounge clashing, nothing nice about the kiss. it was rough and hard and full of need.

"fuckin pathetic, humping me like some bitch in heat." he growled, his mocking turning you on even more. you reached down, struggling to tug at his belt, needing it off.

the less layers between you two- the better.

you gasped as your wooden support was removed, as he took you over and tossed you down on the bed with ease- as if you were a doll. you barely had a second to look at him before he was on top of you, smirk coy as he rutted his denim clothed cock on your cunt, already soaked through your shorts and tights.

he was toying with you.

"im gonna fuck you so hard you're not gonna be able to walk for days." he murmred, lifting your hips up as he tugged at your bottoms, nearly ripping them in half.

"then how are you gonna explain to the group why you're limping around like some fawn hm? cause joshey fucked you so good and so deep and your tight little cunt couldnt take it."

[niceonejames7]

kisses and chicken noodle soup.

remus lupin x reader

words: 914

genre: fluff, sickfic

content: remus comes home to find your passed out on the couch, so he thinks of the best quick aid he can, kisses and chicken noodle soup.

a/n: im writing too many things at once and haven't finished anything that I actually wanted to post. so you get this draft (which kinda sucks) that I wrote a while ago(I think I've posted this before idk) this is all very self indulgent.

...

It had been a long day, too long for your liking. Your feet feel like they don't want to move, at all as you step inside the house. But sadness takes over you as you realise no one's home. You had been wishing that Remus would be home, so you could crash into his arms and fall asleep, but the house is empty. 

Tears prick your eyes because your head hurts too much, and there is no food at home but you power through and make yourself some instant noodles to absolve your hunger. This wasn't going to fill your stomach, but you had no energy left to make anything else. 

As you eat the noodles and watch the show ongoing on tv, the fatigue takes over you and you feel your eyes drooping. You adjust your position and as soon as your head hits the pillow, you're out.

… 

Remus comes home to find the door unlocked. A panic set in his stomach and he rushed inside, only to find you sprawled out on the couch, your arms and one leg dangling. He chuckles and sets his bag on the floor to fix your posture.

The top of your nose was already red, your forehead warm to touch. Remus' throat made a cooing sound he didn't think he was capable of making as he muttered to himself, "Poor baby."

His hand caressed your cheek and your hair as he slowly started to wake you up. 

"Dovey, c'mon, wake up."

You could hear a muffled voice and your hands instinctively reached for him, searching his face. Your hands found the nape of his neck, your thumb across his cheeks and you had wanted to smile but a small frown formed on your lips, "Hi, baby." 

Remus chuckles and wraps his hands around yours and shakes your arm once more, "Bub, if you don't wake up you're going to get cold soup."

The promise of soup was enough to open your eyes, but you immediately squinted as your eyes adjusted to the light.

"Oh I'm sorry," he muttered apologetically and scrambled to turn the lights off and switch on the lamp nearby, all the while his hands never left yours.

As he tugged on your arms to get you to open your eyes, it only deepened your frown, 

"What happened? Does something hurt?" Remus asks, his eyes searching for a sign.

"You're blurry." You say in a timid voice and a grin breaks out on Remus' face, and he laughs before leaning into your lips, saying, "You're cute when you're sick." 

You raise your intertwined hands to your face as he gets closer, the frown on your face never leaving, "No, you'll get sick."

At this Remus releases his grip and takes your face in his hands, and kisses your jaw, then proceeds up to your cheeks, a peck on your nose then finally a sweet kiss to your lips.

"I'm supernatural, your germs don't bother me." It was an excuse to kiss you, as if he would leave any chance to do so. And also, one kiss doesn't hurt anybody, Remus decided.

Remus especially didn't regret his actions when a smile, however small, finally bloomed on your face, smoothing out your frown, and he kissed your nose again.

After taking a few seconds to admire you, Remus snapped back to himself and patted your cheek softly to wake you up, "C'mon, I made you chicken noodle soup."

You slowly got up from your horizontal position, which was an awful reminder of how much your body and head hurt. You groaned as your stretched out your limbs, pressing your fingers to your head, trying to relieve your headache.

Remus ran his fingers through your hair, a comforting motion over all the pain in your body. It always made you feel a little bit guilty, when you complained about being sick or being in pain. When Remus goes through so much, and you can't tolerate a headache.

"I'm sorry you have to put up with me," You say timidly, your voice a little hoarse, "One headache is enough to take me down."

This caused Remus to frown, "First of all, you have a fever."

He continues in a stern voice, "No, look at me. You're sick and in pain, I would never think of taking care of you 'putting up with you'. Do you understand?"

A smile again adorned your face, and Remus felt like he had achieved something, a personal victory.  

You nod and he returns your smile, which lights up his face and all you want to do is pepper his face with kisses.

He takes the bowl of soup in his hands, and sits down on the couch, facing you after turning on the TV. He knew he was in for either a sitcom re-watch or a sappy romantic movie, not that he was complaining. 

After you took the last spoon of soup Remus gave you, and made you take your medicines, you immediately cuddled up to him, giving him no time to adjust and wrapping yourself around him. He smelt nice, and so soft. The jumper he had put on was unbelievably soft. 

You could already feel yourself falling asleep as you cozied up in his arms and his lips kissed your forehead. 

"I love you." You say, like a whisper fading away in the air, but Remus doesn't fail to catch and whisper it back to you,

"I love you too." 

....

another thing! can't believe my poly!marauders fic caught on so much traction! thanks guys, honestly inspired me too much and now I have too much to do

[kpop---scenarios]

Hush, Hush (2) - Final

Pairing: Seonghwa x Reader | Jeongin x Reader | Han x Reader | Minho x Reader

Summary: When you and Seonghwa met, it was almost like love at first sight. But things get hard when he's away, and you get lonely.

Warning: Cheating, Smut (Oral, f. receiving, m. receiving, unprotected sex, protected sex, creampie) Heartbreak, Reader is not a good person

Word Count: 7.5k

Part One

Everything Taglist: @wife2straykidss @piscesrising01 @baby-stay92 @kisses-too-the-moon

@dwaekkiiracha @silly250 @rylea08 @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @satosugu4l

@gabriellamarie

@tsunderelino @iovecb97 @1810cl @lordmaahes-nsc

@sailorkoss @minh0scat @pixie0627 @50-husbands

@jinnies-muse @yaorzu-blog @anskiiz @joyofbebbanburg

@number1jeonginstan @skzooluvr @jisunglyricist @ambersnowxxx

@ayyonoona @31maze13 @stay-tiny-things @thegingerthatwaited

@hoesheez

A/N: Second part to @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 commission! I hope you enjoy!

“I missed you so much.” You whisper, snuggling into Seonghwa.

“Baby.” He whispers, stroking your face. “I have to tell you something.”

“Mhm?” You groan, your eyes closed.

“I have to leave again tomorrow.” He whispers. Your eyes shoot open. “What? Why?” You whine.

“They added more dates to the USA tour. We've got 4 shows each in all the cities.” He says. You can see it in his eyes how excited he is and you hoped he couldn't see how heartbroken you were in your eyes. “I'm sorry they extended it but it's going to be so awesome.” He smiles. “Will you come out to one of the shows?” He asks.

“I'm so happy for you. Of course I will.” You force a smile. “But how long are you gone for?” You ask.

“Um.” He pauses. “Roughly… four months. Maybe longer.”

“F-four months?” You stutter, your stomach sinking and your heart breaking. “That's so long.” You chuckle.

“I know baby but we can get through it. We'll make it. After the USA tour we get a few months off. I promise.” He smiles.

“Of course we'll be fine, Hwa.” You grin. “We always are.”

The next morning, you head to The coffee shop near your place, to get coffee for you and Hwa, since he didn't leave until the evening.

"Hello, what can I get for you today?” The lady asks as you're looking at the menu. You begin to step up, but someone else also starts to step up. You look over, and are shocked to see Han Jisung standing beside you, smiling.

“You can go.” He laughs, motioning you to the counter.

“Thank you.” You giggle, tucking your hair behind your ear. “Hi, can I get two iced vanilla lattes?” You say. “And whatever he wants.” You say, pointing to Han.

“You don't have too. But thank you.” He laughs, waving you off.

“I know but I'd like to.” You reply.

Han orders his coffee, thanking you again.

“A name for the order?” The lady asks.

“Uh, Maya.” You smile. You turn to look at Han, extending your hand as your eyes lock with his. “I'm Maya.” You whisper. He takes your hand, shaking it, still staring at you. “Han Jisung.” He replies, a blush spreading across his face. It makes you laugh.

“I know.”

“Two iced lattes for Maya!” The batista yells, breaking you out of your trance with Han. “Is it for your boyfriend?” He asks, also grabbing his coffee.

“My friend.” You smile. “She drank too much last night.”

“Ahh, okay.” He smiles. “Then it would be okay for me to ask for your number?” He asks, pulling out his phone.

“It would be more than okay.” You whisper, taking his phone, putting your name, not your real name but the name you gave him and your number.

“I'll call you.” He says. “Thanks for the coffee.”

“I'll be waiting.” You laugh, heading out the opposite way, back to your boyfriend. You had a hard time saying no. But who could say no to these men?

“Baby, I'm back.” You call out. You look around the apartment for Hwa but he's nowhere. You see a piece of paper on the table. You walk over reading it outloud.

Hi my love,

They moved the flights up, and I couldn't get a hold of you. They wouldn't wait. I'm so sorry. I'll call you when we land. Remember you mean the world to me and I love you so much. We can do this, baby. Jeongin will be free in a few days. He knows to take care of you. Don't miss me too much.

Love, Hwa.

“Motherfucker.” You yell, tossing his coffee into the garbage, and aggressively drinking yours. You throw away your cup, shuffling to your room and plopping down onto your bed. You were just so angry. So angry you could cry. You were supposed to have two weeks but they took that away. Then you were at least supposed to have the day but they took that away too. Were you ever going to have time with your boyfriend?

You spent the rest of that week, ordering food, staying inside, and ignoring any phone calls from anyone. You weren't in the mood to talk to anyone.

You took a big bite from your burger, when there's a pounding at your door. “I'm coming.” You try to snap with your mouth full. You swing the door open, seeing an angry Jeongin standing outside your door.

“The fuck do you think you're doing?” He snaps, stomping into your apartment. “I thought you were fucking dead, why are you not answering your phone?” He spits.

“Cause Hwa left a fucking note while I was out getting coffee, when I was supposed to have 2 weeks with him, I got a night and didn't even get a chance to say goodbye.” You yell. “That's why I'm not answering my phone.”

“That doesn't give you the right to make me worry. It's been four fucking days.” He sighs. “I'm sorry about Seonghwa. I know it's hard and things change so fast. But you guys will be okay.”

“Yeah, yeah I know. It just sucks.” You pout, walking back to the couch. You truly were so mad at Seonghwa. He hadn't even made an effort to let you know. Jeongin follows you, sitting next to you eating your fries. When you're done with your dinner, you snuggle in against Jeongin, watching a show. His hand resting on your thigh, lightly squeezing, slowly moving its way up. Your clit throbs as he fingers move between your legs, going up the leg of your shorts. He gently rubs your clit over your underwear, making you moan.

“I need you so fucking bad.” He groans, looking down at his cock, bulging against his pants. You smile, licking your lips as you slide off the couch, settling yourself between his legs, helping him pull down his sweats, letting his cock spring free.

You wrap your hand around his cock, gently stroking him as you lean down, wrapping your mouth around his tip. You swirl your tongue around his tip a few times before you begin to take him deeper, slowly pushing him further down your throat. Jeongin groans, throwing his head back onto the back of the couch, squeezing his eyes shut as he grabs a chunk of your hair. You bob your head up and down, swallowing his cock while he thrusts up to push it deeper down.

“Okay, okay.” He breathes, letting go of your hair. You lift your head up, licking your lips, looking him in the eyes.

“Ride me.” He says, watching you take off your clothes, climbing onto the couch to hover over him before you sink your pussy down onto him.

“Fuck.” You hiss, your eyes rolling back as he stretches you out. No matter how many times you had slept with him, you could never get used to how well he fills you up.

You lean forward, beginning to bounce on him, letting his cock slide in and out of you over and over again.

“Goddamn, your pussy feels so fucking good.” He groans, his hands holding your hips as you bounce. He leans forward taking your nipple into his mouth, sucking gently, swirling his tongue around the bud as you start rocking back and forth on his cock. You drag your clit against him each time, making you moan, your orgasm building faster and faster each time. Jeongin's fingers dig into your hips as you pick up your pace.

“Fuck.” He groans. “Ride my cock.” He groans. “Shit, cum for me.”

You move faster, your orgasm right there. “Oh my god.” You cry out as it finally hits you, sending chills up your spine. Your eyes roll back again as you cum, slowing down your movements. Jeongin lifts you up slightly to harshly thrust into you, his own orgasm not far behind yours. Seconds later, he thrusts one last time, groaning loudly as he cums deep inside of you, pumping softly, milking himself for every last drop.

You sit there for a moment, before sliding off his cock. You quickly run to the bathroom to clean yourself up before you head back to the living room, where Jeongin is getting himself together.

You really do take such good care of me.” You giggle, putting your clothes back on.

“I'm just doing what Hwa asked me to do.” He laughs, finishing putting his own clothes back on.

“He asks you to fuck me?” You laugh, making him laugh.

“He asks me to take care of you. It's not my fault this is how you need your care.” He smiles. He leans in, and gives you a kiss, before heading towards the door, putting his shoes on. “Call me. For anything.” He says, leaving you alone again.

Seconds later, your phone rings with an unknown number on the screen. “Hello?” You answer.

“Maya?” The person says.

“Yes?”

“Sorry.” He laughs. “It's Jisung. Han Jisung… from the coffee shop.”

“Hi Han Jisung.” You giggle. “How are you?”

“I'm good. Really good. How are you?” He asks.

“I'm really good as well.” You laugh.

“Great… that's great.” He sighs. “would you… you know maybe wanna get dinner tomorrow?” He asks.

“Really?” You ask, perking up. “I'd love that.”

“Oh great, that's awesome.” Han exclaims. “I'll text you the details.”

“Sounds good. Talk later, Han Jisung.” You giggle, hanging up the phone.

You were excited to go out with him, but were you going to be able to juggle dating three men?

Yes you would be able too. You just needed to make a plan, and it was helpful that you were a quick thinker, giving Minho and Han fake names, that way no one would know. Everything was going to be just fine, and with Seonghwa gone for a while, it would be easy to split up your time between Minho and Han.

The next night, you were getting ready for your date with Han. He had texted you earlier in the day about a well-known, fancy Italian restaurant that he rented out for the night so no one would be able to disturb the two of you. Your heart melted at the sentiment. He was really so sweet and you hadn't even been out with him yet.

Your taxi pulled up outside of the restaurant and you could see Han already there, waiting. You smile as you get out of the car after paying the driver, making your way inside. When the hostess greets you, Han turns around and smiles seeing you standing there. He stands up as you walk towards him, pulling out your chair for you before sitting back down.

“Such a gentleman.” You giggle.

“You look stunning tonight.” He smiles.

“Why thank you.” You smile, a blush spreading across your face. He was so sweet and you loved that he seemed so nervous to be out with you.

The entire night, he had you laughing so hard. You tried to eat your food, but the second you were going to put something in your mouth, he had you giggling again and again. You really liked him, and you were excited to add him into the mix. Each man gave you something else that the others didn't, things that you felt like you were lacking and you appreciate them all. You hadn't planned to sleep with him that night, but things happen, feelings change and that's how you wound up making out with him in the foyer of his apartment, as he leads you towards his bedroom.

“Are you sure this is okay?” Han whispers as he tugs at the zipper of your dress.

“Yes.” You breathe. “I want this.” You say.

Han pulls the zipper down, letting your dress just slide off your body, leaving you in your bra and panties. Han's breath hitches as he stares at you, licking his lips. He grabs you, pulling you into his bedroom where he pushes you back on the bed. He crawls on after you, hooking his fingers into your panties, dragging them down your legs. He tosses them onto the floor before he spreads your legs open, moving in between your thighs. He spreads your lips, licking a long strip up your cunt, making you moan, slightly. He uses the tip of his tongue to flick your clit a few times before he wraps his lips around his, sucking gently on it. You shimmy out of your bra, grabbing your tits, rolling your nipples between your fingers as he sloppily eats your pussy, licking and sucking, making your eyes roll back.

Han slowly pushes two fingers inside of you, making you scream louder, as he finger fucks you and sucks on yout clit.

“Holy shit.” You cry out, your back arching as you can feel your orgasm coming quickly. It doesn't even take seconds for it to hit you. You cry out loudly, while Han slows down his movements, moving his face away, pulling his fingers out as he licks his lips. You lay there breathing heavily as he unbuckles his belt, taking off his pants and letting his hard cock spring free. He reaches over into his bedside table, grabbing a condom and rolling it onto his cock.

He lines himself up with you, slowly pushing his cock inside of you.

Fuck. He stretched you out almost as good as Seonghwa, Jeongin or Minho.

You wrap your legs around his waist as he starts pounding himself into you. Your legs only last there for a second before Han has them up against him, holding onto them tightly as he rams his cock into you, with each thrust pushing himself into you as far as he can go. He legs go of your leg and takes one hand to play with your swollen clit, making you jump when he touches the sensitive bud. He rubs your clits while maintaining his speed, slamming into you each time.

“Fuck, oh fuck.” You cry out, arching your back once again. You can feel your second orgasm coming quickly, you could tell he was going to cum soon too. You let go, letting your orgasm flow through you, clenching your cunt around his cock. Han groans as he moves his hand from your clit, digging his fingers into your legs as he pounds into you, chasing his own high.

“I'm cumming.” He groans, spilling his seed inside his condom, moaning loudly as he works through his orgasm. “Fuck.” He breathes. You keep laying on the bed, trying to make the world stop spinning as Han gets up, discarding his condom before slipping his boxers back on and crawling in beside you.

You lay and talk with him for a little bit, until you decide you should be getting home. As you got dressed, Han laid in his bed, watching you getting dressed, with a big grin plastered on his face.

“I really wanna see you again.” He smiles, making you laugh.

“I'd love to see you again.” You say, finishing up zipping up your dress. You look at your phone, Seonghwa's picture and name flashing on the screen. “I'll call you.” You say, crawling on the bed to kiss him, before you leave his apartment. You call Seonghwa back as you walk away from Han's apartment.

“Hey baby.” He answers the phone.

“Hi.” You say. You were still mad at him for taking off without so much of a goodbye. It hurt your heart and he didn't even try to call you. There were no missed calls on your phone.

“Baby, please. I couldn't get a hold of you.” He sighs.

“Oh you couldn't? Then why were there no missed calls on my phone? Why haven't I talked to you in 5 days since you left?” You ask.

“I had no time!” He exclaims. “They called and said we had to go. I was rushing around. And it's been so busy, this is the first free second I've had.”

You wanted to believe him, and part of you did. But the other part of you didn't. He didn't have a second before bed to even shoot you a text? Or a second as he's rushing out of the apartment down to the hallway before his flight, he couldn't have pressed his speed dial quickly and put his phone up to his ear?

“Okay.” You breathe. He was going to be gone for a while, and the last thing you wanted was to fight about something like this.

“Are we okay?” He whispers. You knew his anxiety was currently eating him alive. He knew you were upset with him but he didn't know how upset you were.

“Yeah, we're fine.” You say. You didn't want to say more. You were extremely upset, and you currently didn't want to talk to him.

“Okay. They're calling me back. I love you, Y/N.” He says.

“Love you too. Good luck.” You say, hanging up the phone. You were annoyed as you waited outside for your Uber. Han offered to take you home but you politely declined, not wanting him to have to leave when he was already home. As you stand there, you can faintly hear someone calling the name Maya. You're turning your head in all directions trying to see who is calling, when someone familiar comes into view.

“Hey you.” Minho smiles, walking up to you. “What are you doing here?” He asks.

“Oh, Minho, hi.” You laugh. “Here? Oh I was just visiting a friend!” You exclaim. “I'm just waiting for my Uber.” You explain.

“Uber? Nah, I'll drive you home.” He says. “There was something I actually had wanted to ask you.” He says, walking you towards his car.

“Something you wanted to ask me, huh?” You giggle, sliding into the passenger seat of his car. Before you let him ask you his question, you told him your address. It took a few minutes of driving before he actually began talking to you.

“I really enjoyed the other night.” He laughs, thinking back to the night the two of you met. “But I wanted to know if you maybe wanted to go on a date with me?” He asks.

“A date? I would love to!” You grin.

“Dancing, dinner, drinks…I don't know, bowling?” He suggests. “Whatever you want to do!” He says, excitedly.

“I'd love to have dinner and drinks.” You smile. Minho smiles widely as he pulls up to your building.

“Awesome, okay.” He says. “I'll call you.”

“Sounds good. Thank you for the ride!” You say, getting out of the car. You wave to Minho before you start walking into your building. As you walked down the hallway of your floor, you noticed someone standing beside your door. You tried to squint to see who it was, but couldn't quite make them out being so far away. But as you got closer, you immediately recognized who it was standing there.

“Innie.” You laugh, walking up to the sour looking man. “What are you doing here?”

“Why were you getting out of Minho’s car?” He asks.

“How did you know that?” You ask, sliding your key into the lock.

“I looked out the window at the end of the hall. You were laughing and smiling. What the hell is going on?” He asks.

“He just gave me a ride. I was visiting a friend.” You laugh. “Are you gonna come in?” You ask, holding the door open for him.

Jeongin takes a deep breath, walking into your place, leaving his concerns outside the door.

**

It had been two months of you dating three men, and only sleeping with one of them, and you were at the point where you were putting dates with who in your calendar, along with information you’ve told them about yourself, like your name, into your notes just so you weren’t getting confused. It was a lot of work, but you were having the time of your life, and they all seemed to be enjoying their time as well. Jeongin was still suspicious, but you maintained that you and Minho were barely acquaintances, he only gave you a ride home that night because it was cold. You even told him that he could ask Minho about you, Y/N and that you were sure he wouldn’t even know who he was talking about. He seemed to accept that, for now. But you were going to have to be smarter if you were going to keep this up and keep Jeongin from finding anything out.

“You’re still coming right?” Seonghwa asks on facetime, as you walk around the apartment.

“You see this stuff in my hands?” You laugh. “These are my clothes that are going over into that suitcase over there, which will be going onto the plane that I will also be on to go to Chicago.” You laugh, putting the clothes into your suitcase.

“When did you get so sarcastic?” Seonghwa laughs. You glare at him through the screen when a call from Minho pops up onto the screen of your phone. You knew Seonghwa couldn’t see it but you still panicked a little and swiped it off the screen.

“What was that? Are you okay?” Seonghwa asks, looking a little concerned.

“Oh yeah.” You laughed it off. “Just a spam call.” You explain.

“I can’t wait to see you, baby.” Seonghwa smiles.

“I can’t wait either.” You sigh. You really missed him. You had the company of Minho, Han and Jeongin but it wasn’t the same as having Seonghwa around. You were having fun with them and you were sure they knew it.

You stood at the airport, looking at the screen for your flight to Chicago, and the large letters of canceled flashing on the screen. You could feel the tears welling up in your eyes as you walked to the desk of the airline you were supposed to fly, seeing if there was anything they could do.

“I’m so sorry, but because of the weather in Chicago, all the flights for at least the next few days have been canceled. And not just with our airline, but with all of them.” She says, giving you a sympathetic smile.

“Thank you.” You whisper, turning around to walk away. You pull out your phone, calling Seonghwa.

“Are you boarded, baby?” He asks. You take a deep breath, trying not to show that you were crying.

“Um.” You begin, your voice trembling. “My flight was canceled.” You say.

“Okay, well just find another one.” He says, in a chipper voice.

“They’re all canceled, Hwa.” You breathe. “Weather in Chicago apparently isn’t good and no one is flying there for the next few days.” You say.

“Baby, this was the only time that worked for both of us.” He whispers. You can hear it in his voice that he’s upset. And so are you. You had been looking forward to seeing him, and being in his arms once again.

“I know.” You sniffle.

“It’s okay, love. It’s been two months, and we only have two more to go, it’ll fly by, okay?” He says. “Stay strong, I love you.” He says.

“I love you too.. But Hwa, I'm feeling really… well not myself. Can we talk?” You ask, walking back towards the doors of the airport.

“They’re calling me back for rehearsal.” He says. “I gotta go, we’ll talk later, okay? Love you!” He says before hanging up the phone.

You put your phone back in your pocket, doing your best to swallow your tears. You knew he was a busy man, but fuck, sometimes you just needed your boyfriend. You knew one person who was around. You pulled your phone out again, dialing his number.

“Hi.” You whisper. “My flight was canceled, can you come get me?” You ask.

“I’ll be there in twenty minutes.” He says, hanging up the phone. You walk over to a little concrete bench, sitting down and waiting. You let all your tears out while you waited, so you didn’t cry the entire time in his car.

What only felt like seconds later, a familiar call pulls up, parking right in front of you. You put your luggage in the back seat before getting into the passenger seat.

“Thank you for coming.” You smile. You were sure your face was red and puffy right now.

“I’d do anything for you.” He smiles, driving back to your apartment.

**

“I just don’t get it.” You whine, laying your head on Jeongin’s lap. “I mean i do get it, but I don’t because if my girlfriend was clearly upset, i’d tell them to fuck off, and talk to her. Maybe he just doesn’t care.” You huff.

“Well you know I'd never do that to you.” He whispers.

You were sure he was joking. “You’re such a dork.” You laugh.

“Listen.” He starts. “If you’re this unhappy with things, why not end it?” Jeongin asks.

“Tour doesn’t last forever.” You say. “When he’s back home, things will be fine. But it's hard when you're apart for so long. Like he said, only two more months.” You sigh.

“Yeah, I'm sure it will be.” He sighs.

**

Over the next month and a half, you absolutely started to feel better, you had been going out with Minho on Monday, Wednesday’s and Friday’s, and he had asked you to be his girlfriend after a few dates. Of course you said yes.

You had also been going out with Han on Tuesday’s, Thursday’s and Saturday’s, and he had also asked you to be his girlfriend. Who were you to say no and deny him? As for Sundays, you saved that day for yourself, or for seeing Jeongin, who seemed to be upset every time you talked to him.

“What’s going on?” You ask Jeongin. “You’ve been so mad whenever you come over.”

“Do you know a girl named Maya? Or Jennie?” He asks.

“Mhmm, no, those names don't sound familiar?” You murmur. Your stomach was twisting and turning. He didn’t know, right? “Why?” You ask.

“Han and Minho are each dating a girl, I was just wondering if you knew who they were.” He says. Your stomach settles.

“Nope, I don’t.” You say.

You hoped this wasn't going to blow up in your face. But even if it did, it wouldn't be the end of the world.

A few days later, you were sitting in your bed, scrolling through your phone, before your date with Minho, when you received a call from Seonghwa. It had been a few days since you talked to him. “Hello?” You say, answering the phone.

“Hi baby.” He whispers.

You knew there was going to be bad news.

“What?” You ask. “Something happened, or you need to tell me something.” You say.

“The tour…” He pauses.

If they extended it, you were going to burst.

“They’ve added some Canadian dates, and some in Mexico too.” He says.

“So?” you sigh. “How much longer?” You ask.

“They’re also talking about adding more European dates.” He says. “I don’t know, maybe another 6 months if they add them all.” He explains.

You felt numb now. You were just numb. You weren't going to see your boyfriend? That's fine, you had two other’s you could fall back on. You still loved Seonghwa, but you were getting tired of not seeing him. And you knew that Minho, Han and Jeongin might be going on tour soon, also. So you better get used to being alone, or maybe you just need to find more boyfriends for when that happens.

“Okay.” You say.

“Okay?” he questions. “That’s all you have to say?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say, Hwa. Do you want me to cry? Do you want me to yell? What good will any of those things do? Will you come back and skip the rest of the tour?” You ask.

“Well… no.” He sighs. “I don’t know. I just wasn't expecting you to accept it so easily.” He admits.

“Does it hurt? Yeah it absolutely does. Do I wish you would come home? Yeah i fucking miss you but theres nothing i can do, except maybe try to come out to one of the shows. But I love you and I know you’re doing what you love so I can't be upset at that anymore.” You say.

“You’re the fucking best, baby. I’ll figure out a date that works for me and see if it works for you. And if it does, I’m booking you the first flight out. Okay?” he says.

You smile. “Sounds good.” You say.

There's a knock at the door. You know it’s Minho.

“Is someone at the door?” Seonghwa asks.

“Oh, it’s Jeongin. He wanted to go for dinner.” You respond.

“Ah okay, well have fun baby. I love you.” He says.

“I love you more.” You whisper, hanging up the phone. You get up and out of bed, running to your front door. You pull it open, grinning at Minho.

“Hi baby.” He says, grabbing you, planting his lips onto yours.

He pulls away, smiling.

“Hello to you too.” You giggle.

“Are you ready to go?” he asks.

“Just about, I have to put my shoes on.” You say, shuffling over to your shoe rack. You slip on your favorite heels that aren't really heels, but they’re still cute. “Now I'm ready.” You say.

“Good, I've got a fun evening planned.” He says, taking your hand and pulling you out of the apartment.

**

Over the next few months, you have completely fallen for Han and Minho. You were still in love with Seonghwa, but those two were constantly there for you in ways that Seonghwa hadn’t been able to be in what felt like forever. You knew you couldn’t be doing it like this for much longer. Seonghwa would be home in a few months and you wouldn’t be able to see either of them and that would end up raising some questions. You needed to choose, but you didn’t have a single idea of who you were going to pick.

You’d been with Seonghwa the longest and you loved him, but there was something about Minho that had you drawn to him. And Han was just so sweet and attentive. How was a girl even supposed to make a choice like this?

One Sunday, you were at home, alone, exhausted from a week with your two boyfriends. You were lounging on your couch when you heard a knock before a distraught looking Jeongin walked in, heading straight for you.

“We need to talk.” He says, seriously.

“Is Seonghwa okay?” You ask.

“Who gives a fuck!” Jeongin snaps.

“Innie.” You whisper. “What’s going on?” You ask.

“I love you.” He breathes. “Fuck, i’ve loved you for so long, Y/N. I’m here. I’m standing right in front of you. Where is he?”

“Innie… he’s on tour doing what he loves.” You say. “We were just having fun… it was anything serious… at least it wasn't supposed to be.” You whisper.

“You’re still gonna choose him?” Jeongin scoffs.

“I’ll always choose him.” You whisper.

Jeoning scoffs, nodding his head before he takes off, slamming the door in the process. You have never seen him so angry at anything, let alone you. You felt a little guilty, like you had been stringing him along. Jeongin was a great guy and a great lay, but you didn’t have those types of feelings for him. Your feelings were stretched enough between Minho, Han and Seonghwa.

Not long after, you had been laying on your couch, watching your favorite series, when there was another knock at your door. You roll off the couch, shuffling towards the door. You pull it open, Surprised to see Minho standing there.

“Jennie, what the fuck is going on?” He asks.

“What do you mean?” You ask. Before he can open his mouth, someone else chimes in. “Jennie?” you hear from around the door. “Her name is Maya.” Han says, coming into view.

“She’s not Jennie or Maya.” You hear a familiar voice. Seconds later Jeongin walks into view.

“Her name is Y/N, and her 3 year anniversary with Park Seonghwa is coming up soon.” He says.

“What?” Minho asks, looking between both men.

“So you’ve been dating four fucking people?” Han asks.

“Oh no, she hasn’t been dating me.” Jeongin says. “She’s only been fucking me whenever she wants but has no feelings for me.”

“What the fuck, Jennie… Maya… or whatever the fuck your name is.” Minho snaps.

“I can’t do this.” Han whispers. Both men walk away, Leaving you and Jeongin standing face to face.

“Why?” You whisper. You felt like you were going to throw up. “Why would you do this? How did you even find out?”

“I’m not a fucking moron, Y/N. I see shit. You’re not as sneaky as you think you are.” He snaps, turning to walk away. “Oh, and before I go, You should be expecting a phone call from Seonghwa.” He smiles, leaving you to drop to the ground as your phone begins to ring.

“Hello?” You whisper.

“Y/N, why am i getting calls and texts from Jeongin saying you’ve been dating fucking Minho, Han and fucking Jeongin?” He snaps.

“I don’t know, baby!” You say. “He’s mad at me I think.” You tell him.

“Why would he be mad at you?” Seonghwa asks.

“Because he confessed his feelings to me!” You exclaim. You were so glad this wasn't happening in person. Your entire body was heating up, you were sure your face was so extremely flushed at this moment.

“And what did you say?” He asks.

“I told him that I love you and I wasn't interested in being anything other than friends with him.” You explain. “He was so angry. So now he's trying to ruin us by making this shit up.”

“Have you been sleeping with him?” Seonghwa asks.

“Oh my god, Seonghwa, come on, you seriously think I would do that? I love you!” You say.

“I don’t know what to think right now.” He sighs. “I gotta go, I need to sort some things out. I’ll call you when I'm ready.” He says, hanging up the phone. You wander back to your shared room with Seonghwa. Your stomach was in knots thinking about what was going to come from this.

Over the next few days, you received hurtful texts from Minho and Han. You did feel guilty for hurting them but that's kind of a part of life, right? Had Jeongin not ruined it, you had had a plan, and a good one in place. It was one that would have let them down easily, and hopefully spared their feelings.

You felt alone now. You had needed them while Seonghwa was gone and that’s what Jeongin didn't understand. This wasn't you trying to be a terrible person, it was you getting what you needed until the one you loved more came home.

It had been almost a week since you’d spoken to Seonghwa and the feeling of anxiety honestly got worse with each day. You were desperate to know what he was thinking. Did he still love you? Was he still going to be with you? Did he really believe Jeongin?

As you were laying on the couch, staring at the blank screen, waiting for Seonghwa to call you, you heard a key go in the lock.

There were only two other people who had a key.

Jeongin and Seonghwa.

You sit up, staring at the door. The door opens, and in walks Seonghwa.

“How are you home?” You yell, running towards him. You jump onto him, and he holds onto you, but he doesn't squeeze you like he usually does. You can feel the anger he has without him even saying a word.

You slide down, standing on the floor, looking at him.

“Baby?” You whisper.

“I took a leave. This shit…this shit you’re putting me through is fucking me up.” He says, walking past you towards the couch. “How could you do this to me? To us?” He asks, his voice trembling. You watch him, his lip quivering as he tries to hold in his tears. But he can't. He breaks down, sitting on the couch sobbing into his hands. You don't know what to do. He's crying so hard and loudly, honestly it was making you a little uncomfortable.

“I didn’t do anything! I told you, Jeongin is lying!” You say.

His head snaps up. He wipes away his tears as anger fuels him. “Then why do i have fucking pictures?” He screams, standing up. He unlocks his phone, scrolling to the pictures. He shows you one of you and Minho, looking cozy and laughing at a dinner date. He scrolls again, showing you a picture of you and Han, kissing. He scrolled again, showing you a picture of you and Jeongin, him with you going down on him.

“Well fuck.” You say. You didn't know there were pictures. Had you known you probably would have just come out and told him the truth. What did you do now?

Apologize.

“I’m sorry.” You whisper. You're trying to cry. You're trying to show him that you feel bad. “I’m so sorry.” You sniffle, as one tear rolls down your cheek.

Fuck.

“So it’s true.” He breathes. “Did you ever love me?” He asks.

That question turned things around. Instead of trying to look sorry, you were angry. “Did I ever love you? Are you fucking kidding me?” You snap.

“I've loved you through fucking everything. The late practices, the music shows, the rehearsals, recordings, concerts and the fucking tours! I should be asking you that question! You left a note, Hwa! A fucking note and you were going to be gone for four fucking months, and you left a goddamn note!” You scream.

“Y/N.” He whispers.

“No! I’ve missed you so fucking much! It hurt so much! I tried to talk to you but you were too busy! I was lonely and you didn’t care. Yeah, I went about it probably in the worst fucking way possible but i did what I needed to do to get through it, and i’m sorry I did this to you. You can hate me, you can break up with me, you can do whatever you feel like you need to do. But don’t ever question if I loved you or not because you know I fucking did.”

Seonghwa sits there, looking down at the ground. He doesn't say anything and you have nothing else to say. You walk out of the room, putting on your shoes, grabbing your bag and leaving the apartment.

**

“You did what!?” Lisa gasps. You sip on your cocktail after explaining the entire thing to her. “Honestly, I thought you just hooked up with Minho that one time.” she says. “I had no idea you were full on dating him, and Han!? Girl!” she laughs. “And then Jeongin too?”

“I wasn't dating him.” You clarify. “I was just sleeping with him when I wanted. Which I mean, I get but it was never supposed to be serious. It was casual and he knew it.”

“Did he know it?” She asks.

“I thought he did. But somewhere along the lines he caught feelings.” You sigh.

“I mean… who wouldn't.” Lisa laughs, which makes you laugh.

“But he was the one who told all of them. So I have nothing more to say to him, ever again.” You say, finishing your cocktail.

Just as you set your glass back onto the bar, the door opens. You look over, seeing Jeongin looking around the bar. You immediately duck, trying to hide yourself. You were drunk, and you had no interest in speaking to him.

“Y/N.” you hear him say. You let out a sigh, sitting up, turning to look at him.

“I’m drunk and not responsible for what I call you or what I say to you.” You warn him.

“I’m sorry.” He says. “I thought if maybe they all knew the truth, then you would maybe consider me.” He tells you.

“So you blew up my life, because I wouldn’t date you?” you ask. You knew it was yes. You knew that was the reason he did this but you just needed him to confirm it.

“Yeah… I’m sorry.’ He whispers.

“Don’t ever fucking talk to me again.” You snap. You slam some money down on the bar, leaving him there and walking out. You wander around the streets. You weren't ready to go home but wandering was nice, it helped you think. You knew this wasn't Jeongin’s fault. It was a little, but the blame was mostly on you. The secret would have come out eventually, he just sped up the process.

You were just twisted in the way you were thinking and rationalizing the decisions you made. You were good at saying that you were sorry but you knew you weren't legitimately sorry. The only thing you were truly sorry for was the fact that you had been caught. Had this not happened, who knows how long this would have gone on for. What if it was years and then what were you supposed to do if they all proposed?

Fuck. That would have been a nightmare. Maybe you should be thanking Jeongin for this?

You didn't know how to feel about your relationship with Seonghwa. You didn’t know what to do. Your fucking head was nothing but a jumbled, tangled mess and you didn’t know if you were going to be able to untangle it, or how. You ended up wandering back to your shared apartment with Seonghwa. You were a little nervous to go in, but you knew you needed to face the consequences. You opened the door and were met with nothing but silence. The lights were off, the tv was off and it was so quiet, you could hear a pin drop.

You turned on the kitchen lights, seeing a piece of paper on the kitchen table.

Y/N,

I’m sorry for not being there when you needed me. You put up with a lot, and I wasn't as appreciative as I should have been. I’ve loved you for almost three years, and i dont think I'll ever stop, but what you did was unforgivable. I can't look at you the same anymore. My trust for you is completely gone. I’m sorry it’s come to this. You can keep the apartment. I’ll get my stuff when I'm back from tour.

Hwa

Part of you wanted to cry, but the other part of you felt relieved. You were now free to do whatever you wanted. You weren't tied down anymore, and you could breathe. You loved Seonghwa and you always would, but you weren't sure if you were meant for relationships. Maybe you were just meant to be alone?

**

A few months later, you're backstage at an awards show, when you see Minho and Han with Jeongin all talking. You haven't spoken to Minho or Han since the night they confronted you and you had always felt a little tug at your heart to make amends with them. They seemed to need it more than you did. You take a deep breath, walking over to them. They look at you with stone cold faces.

“Um, hi.” You say. It’s awkward. “Listen, I just wanted to sincerely apologize to both of you for what I did. It wasn’t right and I shouldn't have done that. I was being greedy and I'm sorry.”

“Thank you, Y/N.” Han says.

“Yeah, thanks.” Minho half smiles.

You look at Jeongin, not saying a word, before turning to walk away, going back to where you were waiting for the man who has seemingly changed your entire way of thinking in the last few months. You had met him when you were out at a club, only days after you lost four important people in your life and things with him had been so different from anything else you had experienced.

“Baby, you made it!” You hear a familiar voice from behind you.

You turn around, seeing your boyfriend, Hoseok rushing towards you. You smile widely, putting your arms out for him to grab your and spin you around. “I missed you.” He says, placing a kiss on your lips.

“I missed you too!” You say, hugging him tightly. He sets you down, and from over his shoulder you can see Seonghwa standing there, looking broken as he stares at you with Hoseok.

You look away, focusing on your boyfriend instead of your past. “Listen, we might be going on a tour soon.” He sighs.

“Aww baby, that's okay.” You smile, glancing over his shoulder, catching the eye of Hoseok's best friend, Minhyuk from BTOB. You send him a wink, before looking back at J-hope.

“We'll get through it.”

《 If you enjoy reading my stories and would like to commission one, or donate to help keep me writing you can do so HERE. It would be so appreciated as I am in a bind currently.》

[tumblerlove]

Yes, I am alive....no, I don't even know where it is that I disappeared to, but I'm back 😌 so here's some Rafe angst that does end happy, though

"Rafe, what's wrong?" You gasp as you see your boyfriend absolutely distraught....

You hadn't heard from Rafe all day, which is werid for him. If you two can't be together that day, then he'll call you at least. But he hadn't even texted you either. That's why you're knocking at Tannyhills door right now. Wheezie had let you in, and you could tell the house was tense by the look on her face. It was just her and Rafe. You didn't hear or see Ward, Rose, or Sarah around

You knock on his door before entering. "Wheezie, go away, I don't want to talk right now," he yells behind the door. You open it anyway and peek inside and see him on the edge of his bed

You tell him softly, "It's just me, Rafe." He whips his head towards you and can see that his eyes are teary and red. And omg, there's a bruise under his eye. And maybe even his lip is cut?! His hair looks disheveled like his hands had been running through it

"Rafe, what's wrong!?" You gasp as you see your boyfriend absolutely distraught. "What...what are you doing here?" As he stands up and looks away from you

"I came to check on you...I hadn't heard from you it's not like you." You tell him as he looks away from you. "Rafe, tell me what happened," you ask him, your tone pleading a little, trying to find out what happened that has him like this

"Just fucking go. I don't want you seeing me like this, " his voice raising at you, still looking away from you. He never would talk to you like this

"Don't talk to me like that, Rafe...I'm your girlfriend. I have a right to find out what's got you so upset so I can help." Your tone is firm but still caring

"God, I'm sorry, baby. I didn't mean to raise my voice at you," he tells you his tone softer now. He turns around to you. "Oh Rafe," you gasp out and walk up to him and inspect the black eye forming already. He does infact have a cut on his cheek and his lip, too

"Did you get into a fight?" You look at him, knowing how he was before meeting you. "No, no, I promise," his tone serious. You can tell he didn't fight as you see his hands are clean, no cuts or blood on them

"If you won't tell me then... just let me fix you up and take care of you." Your eyes finding his that are watering again. He mumbles "Ok" as you step closer to him and hold his hand, moving him towards his bathroom

He sits on the toilet seat as you grab some things to patch him up, still curious as to what happened. You clean his cuts, making sure they don't get infected. He winces when you use a cleaning spray. "I'm sorry, baby." You lean down and kiss, his forehead

"It was my dad," he blurts out as you make eye contact with him. Trying not to move or speak, so he continues on. "He got pissed off because the job he had me working on fell through." his eyes look hurt. You knew that he had been working on it and trying so hard to make it work.

He's holding your waist as if you'll keep him grounded while telling you. "I told him that I tried everything, and the guy had pulled out last minute. He didn't believe me... said I must have fucked something up." Rafes words mumbled as he presses his face into your stomach, not being able to look at you

"When I defended myself again he pushed me and when I tried to push him away he punched me and his ring cut me too" he looks finally up at you as you both have tears in your eyes

"Oh Rafe," you look at him, pulling him to you so you can hug him properly. "I...I didn't even defend myself. I just walked away after like a coward." He sounds defeated and tired. "You did the right thing. You're the bigger person. You've grown from this behavior." You try to help him calm down and reason with him that he did good

"You know how much worse it could've been baby if you would've fought him back," you say, holding his face to look you in the eyes. "You are a stronger man for walking away. Your father is the coward."

"I fucking hate this" he looks up at you eyes watery. "I'm so tired," Rafe says, his voice and face breaking your heart

You pull him up and start moving him back to the bedroom. "Let's get you comfortable and in bed," you smile up at him, doing your best to help him. Rafe just mindlessly follows you as you pick out sweats for him to change into

"Let me help you," you step closer to him to start getting his shirt off. "You don't have to, baby," his voice soft while looking at you. "I know... but I want too" you say as you get him into sweatpants

As you get him into bed and make him comfortable, he grabs your hand. "Can you stay here tonight?" Rafe asks softly. "Of course I was just gonna change into something comfortable," you cup his face before changing

When you're changed into one of Rafes' shirts and a pair of underwear, you climb into bed with him. His eyes are puffy from crying and swollen from his black eye. It breaks your heart seeing him like this, knowing he's eating himself up over his dad's shit

"Rafe...." you ask as he's snuggled against your back, cuddling against you. "Yes, love," he says, sleepy. "You should move in with me," you blurt out. You feel his body stiffen for a second until he says, "I'll start packing in the morning." He kisses your neck as he falls asleep

Next morning, you wake up to the sounds of Rafe packing his things up with a smile on his face.

[haveateadude]

hi again ems!! (hope its okay if i call you that 😭) im the one who sent the last req, you wrote it so wonderfully. thanks for your concerns, wishing you the best !!

no pressure once again!! could you possibly write fluff about els taking you on a lil picnic to a flower field ? thank you once again!! 💗💗

picnic date

summary *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ picnic day with your lover

warnings *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ none, this is pure fluff i think

author notes *. ⋆ ⋆·˚ hey!! omg your welcome to the person who sent this!!! i love uuu. i hope you like this one :)) also it's totally okay to call me em!! please feel free to send more request if you'd like!!!

and i'm so fucking sorry this took too long and it's too short. i've been busy lately but i have a week of online classes bc of some weird shit going on in my country so i hope i'll be able to write more.

have a good day everyone❤️

Ellie takes you on a date. A picnic date, precisely. She knows you've been stressed lately, and she thought taking you out might help take your mind off things—at least for a while. You knew it would be lovely, but not like this. This is beautiful. Going to a flower field has always been on your bucket list, let alone having a picnic with the person you love most.

"Ellie!" you exclaim. "Why did you—I mean… Shit. This is beautiful."

Ellie leaves the basket of food on the blanket, then stands behind you, wrapping her arms around you and placing a kiss on your neck.

"You deserve this," she says, resting her chin on your shoulder as you look out at the flower field. It feels like a dream—dating her has always felt this way. "I hope you enjoy it. It took me a while to find a place like this."

You turn around, and her hands never leave your body; they settle on your hips now. "I love this."

The sun peeks through the clouds and shines directly into her eyes and along the curve of her nose. You’ve always thought she’s pretty—but in moments like this, when it’s just the two of you with nothing to do but enjoy each other’s presence, she looks ethereal. You kiss her, both of your hands on her cheeks.

"Thank you for bringing me here," you say as you both sit down. "Really, you didn't have to."

"I wanted to." She shrugs, smiling. "I thought we should do something nice; it's been a while since we've had time for ourselves."

You lean in for another kiss, which Ellie returns happily.

"God," you say, letting your head rest on her shoulder, "What did I do to deserve you?"

"You're asking me that?" she says, incredulous. "You're the prettiest, smartest, sweetest, and coolest girl I've ever met… How could I not love you? That's the real question."

You feel your cheeks flush, a warm pink spreading across your face as you look up at her. You’ve always thought Ellie was prettier than you—hell, you’ve always thought she was better at everything. She’s smart, beautiful, and always knows what to say. But the way she talks about you always makes you feel like she’s put you on a pedestal, for better or worse.

You chuckle, eyes bright with devotion. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too." Ellie’s the one to kiss you now, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. "I really can't believe I'm dating you."

After you finish eating, you eventually end up with your head resting on her lap. The sun has faded a bit, leaving blue and orange streaks scattered across the sky. It looks beautiful, you think, as Ellie tucks daisies into your hair, braiding a strand every now and then. It feels nice, her fingers brushing against your scalp.

"You look so sleepy, baby," Ellie chuckles, finishing with a kiss on your forehead. "Are you sure you don't want to head back?"

You shake your head and sit up. "Can we stay a while longer?"

Ellie doesn’t answer; she leans in for a kiss and gently guides you both to lie down until your back hits the ground, with her next to you, propped up on one elbow. One of her hands rests on your cheek, her thumb gently caressing your skin as you keep on kissing.

When you pull away, Ellie rests her head on your chest. You wrap your arms around her.

"I think we can stay here a little while longer."

[babyjakes]

baby barnes | homecoming.

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

summary | upon returning from a small solo mission, natasha has something to give to steve.

characters | steve rogers, natasha romanoff, bucky barnes, other assorted avengers, 'baby barnes' (original character)

warnings | all warnings from the original headcanon probably apply (slightly above canon level violence, child abuse, major character death.) very angsty, steve cries a lot.

word count | 1,440

an | based on my baby barnes headcanon, with some slight changes to the universe and storyline. in this version of events, after bucky is killed, nat goes on a solo rage mission to kill everyone at the hydra facility and bring baby barnes home to steve 🩷

"Sorry. This place is a mess."

As hard as he tried, Steve just couldn't pick his gaze up off of the floor as Natasha stood there in the doorway to his living quarters. "It's okay. Things have been hard, I know." The redhead's voice seemed as though it was trying to float through a thick screen of smoke, or maybe Steve was just underwater. Maybe he had been drowning for weeks.

It was quiet as the woman entered, slipping her shoes off on the mat near the door. Steve could feel her careful eyes taking him in, assessing the damage. Every word he pulled from his throat felt like a fishing line digging right back into his burning flesh as he questioned quietly, "Would you like some tea?"

He didn't have to lift his gaze to tell that she had shaken her head. The pair moved further into the room in silent tandem, Steve leading the way over to the long beige couch. The blonde's focus was fleeting as his eyes fell on his friend's lap, before shifting over to the old photo albums on the coffee table, then to the front door, then back to his own folded hands. Natasha cleared her throat, and Steve almost found it amusing, the way she was preparing to speak like she could possibly find anything to say in that moment that would somehow make things better.

"The mission was successful," was what she finally stated, the underwhelming words drawing a knowing look onto the supersoldier's face.

He nodded, doing his best to keep things polite. It wasn't Natasha's fault that he had fallen so out of love with the world; he knew that. "I'm glad," Steve hummed, thinking back to the telephone brief he had received about the agent's assignment before it had been launched. "She's just going in to clear out a suspected outpost. Nothing major," Stark had told him. The captain didn't like sending anyone off on solo missions, but he wasn't in any state to tag along, and thankfully it didn't seem like he was needed.

Through the heavy air, Natasha took another breath before finally speaking again. "I have something to show you." Her hand slipped quietly into her pocket before appearing again, holding a small photograph by its corner. When she handed it to Steve, the man couldn't help but begin to weep.

For a moment, all he could see was the girl's tender face. The face that had haunted his dreams for the past several months, ever since that first 'baby barnes' tape had arrived in the mail. In the photo, which he held tight with both of his shaking hands, the infant's big brown eyes were looking up at something. Her cheeks were round and soft, rosy as ever. Steve couldn't help but wonder when the picture had been taken, how close it was to capturing the baby's last moments on earth before she was put to rest like her father.

Finally shifting his attention away from her angelic face, the blonde trembled as he started scanning the rest of the photo for any clues. Brow furrowing in confusion, he was immediately puzzled by the plush blanket that sat in a messy pile surrounding the baby's little bottom and legs. "What's this?" he paused quietly as he thought back through all the tapes that were permanently engraved in his memory, like an endless reel of vivid film looping across the walls of his troubled mind. Not a single one had shown the infant with any sort of blanket or covering; that would go directly against the purpose of the project. She was deprived of any warmth, human or inanimate, as a simple yet effective form of torture. The blanket in the photo simply didn't belong. Steve was absolutely sure of it.

The next indicator that something was off was the state of the baby herself. She was unusually clean, her ivory skin appearing fresh and well-kept. Her medium brown whisps of hair laid neatly over her small head, lacking the usual knots and mats that he had grown used to seeing. Swallowing hard, Steve was struggling to understand why she looked so different, almost as if someone had been caring for her for the first time in her short life.

Desperate for any sort of explanation, the captain kept studying the photo, trying to make sense of each little detail he could make out. The background itself was insignificant, just a simple wall of dark metal paneling that didn't give any insight as to where or when the picture was taken. But then, in the very corner of the photo, Steve was finally given his answer. The edge of a jacket sleeve was just barely visible against the floor, the navy fabric recognizable to him anywhere; it was Nat's, an old garment from the team's days with SHIELD. The man's breath hitched in his throat as he began to stammer.

"N-Natasha," his voice wavered. "Nat. Where... how... wh-when was this-?" Steve continued staring at the small photo, more tears building in his eyes as he choked back something between a whimper and a sob. "Wh-when did you... w-was this, were you-?"

"This morning," the agent told the supersoldier softly, reaching out to place a steadied hand over one of his shaking ones. "Bruce and I got her all cleaned up and sorted out in the med bay. She wasn't a big fan of the bath, but we got a little smile out of her when we blew bubbles with the soap." Natasha's gaze was tentative, not knowing how Steve would take the news. But as she sat there, watching the revelations sink in for her friend, she couldn't help but let slip what she had been wanting to tell him since the moment she laid eyes on the infant while breaching the lonely Siberian outpost. "After what they did to Bucky, I knew what I had to do," she said quietly. "I had to save her for you, Steve. You would've done the same for me."

All at once, Steve could feel nearly a month of tension and agony lifting from his bones as he took what seemed like his first breath since witnessing Bucky's last through a screen. If he hadn't been seated, he would've fallen to his knees right there, maybe before God or maybe before his dear friend, the one who he now understood had brought the baby back safely after an undoubtedly perilous mission. The baby, the baby, the baby... that was all the captain's mind could hold onto as he sat there, clutching her photo as if both of their lives depended on it. She was alive, she was safe. And she had been brought home to him.

"Natasha," Steve choked out the young woman's name through tears, his voice like warm hands cradling their years of partner and friendship. There was something so unspeakably profound about the endless ways they were willing to live and die for each other; neither of the two could put it into words, but the feeling was certainly present all around as they sat there in the man's small living room, holding onto each other in a moment of shared silence. The gravity of Nat's actions was quick to settle in, and the significance of what she had done- all on her own, without being asked- was nearly unbearable to Steve. "Y-you went... all on your own? You could've-"

"I had to, Steve," Nat cut him off gently, her certainty on the matter unmistakable as it flashed across her face. "You were in no condition to fight, and the others would've only been in the way." As much as he didn't like what he was being told, Steve knew it was the truth. Things had gotten bad for Nat after Bucky's final tape; her decline was much more subtle than that of the captive's best friend, though he was still quick to notice it. It was only his nature. Now Steve understood that when she went dark like that, little could come between the agent and what she set out to do. As much as it worried him sick, that worry couldn't quite outdo the larger sense of relief that was flowing through him like water.

Steve's gaze drifted back to the tiny girl sat posing in the photo, another wave of grief washing over him as he saw a shadow of his late friend gazing back at him through those familiar brown eyes. Giving his hand a gentle squeeze, Natasha finally made the proposition, "Whenever you're ready, I'll take you to see her."

[jjmaybankssurfergf]

Heated

Requested by a lovely lovely anon 😘😘

warnings: angst, cursing, fluff, making up, not proof read, jj drinking and smoking toooo much but thats ok 🤫

AU: This took awhile and i'm sorry about that nonnie, i really hope you enjoy it though! just a blurb btw

JJ had gotten home late that night, from work. He was beyond exhausted, he delt with kooks all day and was super irritated. He came home to you in a very very happy mood, which meant you would be non stop talking and you would be all over jj. He walked through the door, dropping his bag on the floor going into the kitchen grabbing out a beer from the fridge. That’s when you snuck up on him wrapping your arms around him “Boo” jj glanced behind him annoyed “Not now please, I’m tired” he says pushing you off him.

You pout “but I missed you I didn’t get to see you all day” you whine wrapping your arms around him again. He rolled his eyes sighing turning to face you. "Y/N i told you not right now, i'm fucking exhausted and i don't want to be touched all over right now. Give me some damn space" you frowned letting go but you take his beer instead going to the couch to drink it, instead of him. He gave you a look, an irritated one when you took his beer. He followed you over to the couch as you sat down drinking his beer. "Excuse you, but thats my beer. Give it back"

"No" you say taking another sip "Y/N i'm not fucking playing around right now. Give me my beer" you looked at him still not giving up the beer and you took another sip from it again giving him a scowl "No, you don't need it. Your in a bad mood i'm not letting you get drunk when your all pissy and whiny" that was JJ's last straw, he stomped over snatching the beer from you "I'm fucking done with you being a brat! I'm absolutely fucking done! All you do is bitch and complain! 'You never wanna cuddle' 'oh you never wanna lay with me' boo hoo shit! I work i'm too busy for your bullshit, and your so fucking annoying. If your so damn miserable then Leave!"

"Maybe i will! Your always such a jerk, and you constantly work and never make time for me! All you do is smoke weed and drink beer JJ, so yeah i complain a lot because thats all you ever do!" you storm out going into your bedroom slamming the door, JJ sat out on the couch rubbing his head finishing his beer he had. He did drink and smoke a lot but was it really that much? he thought. Was it that much that your guys' relationship was going to shit? He sat there a little longer before getting up to go to your room, opening the door walking in "Baby, i'm sorry- I know i'm a jerk sometimes and i just- i just feel bad" you look at him still upset, but it had subsided when you. saw the look on his face "i really do love and care about you, y/n and i'm so sorry i'm always busy" you get up going towards him "i love you too, its ok. I was being kinda selfish too" you say hugging him, he wrapped his arms around you holding tightly. He brushes a strand of hair away from your face kissing your cheek "i don't wanna argue like that again ok?" he says holding you close "ok" you reply kissing him "promise?" he asks "promise."

More note: i think i rewrote this at least 5 times before settling on it

taggs: @kraekat29 @chimindity @redhead1180 @alliisinwonderland05 @maybanksprincess

@princessmaybank @rafeyscurtainbangs @pankowkisses @pankowperfection

[bunmurdock]

Just the thought of Matt comforting you when you’ve reached your breaking point.

He can hear the way your breathing is uneven, the taste of salt in the air as you blink back tears, the way you’re trying to hold yourself together and insist you’re fine.

Yet all it takes is him pulling you close in a hug and telling you to let it that breaks the dam and you sob into that embrace. He holds you tighter, his own heart aching as your sobs rip through you. He never lets go for a second, comforting you throughout.

And when you’re done, if you’re not feeling up for talking about it right then, Matt gently lifts you up and carries you to the bedroom. He makes sure to grab some tissues and has you drink some water after all the tears you shed. And after some more reassurance (“Whenever you’re ready to talk about it sweetheart, I’ll be here. Get some rest”), he’ll lay down and hold you close. You curl up into him, your head against his chest so you can listen to his heartbeat like a lullaby as you let sleep take you.

You know the ache in your chest and the exhaustion in your mental state will have drained you even when you eventually wake up, but at least Matt will be there to help you through it

(From someone who is absolutely going through it and know Matt’s hugs might probably fix me, if only for a while)

i'm so sorry for what you're going through, nonnie. ♡

matt murdock would sense the shift in you the moment you step inside your shared home—your heart beating just a little too fast, your footsteps heavy with exhaustion. and he’d move toward you, no questions asked, arms already opening to pull you in. “come here, sweetheart,” he’d murmur, voice low and soft, and that’s it—all the strength you’ve been trying so hard to hold onto crumbles.

he’d hug you so tightly—so completely—that it’d feel like nothing bad could touch you while you’re wrapped in his arms. one hand would cradle the back of your head, pressing you into his chest, while the other rubs slow, soothing circles on your back. “you don’t have to hold it in,” he’d whisper, his breath warm against your hair. “just let it out, baby. i’ve got you.” his words would crack something open in you, and you’d sob, gripping at him like he’s the only thing keeping you from falling apart.

when the tears slow, he’d press a kiss to your temple, gentle and lingering. “come on,” he’d say, lifting you effortlessly into his arms like you weigh nothing at all. you’d feel every solid muscle shift, every steady heartbeat against your own chest, and it’d remind you that he’s here, that he’s not going anywhere. he’d carry you to the couch or the bed, settling you down with so much care, like you’re something precious that needs tending. “let’s get you comfortable,” he’d say, grabbing you his soft plaid blanket and wrapping it around you, tucking it in snugly.

he’d kneel next to you, thumb brushing away the lingering tears on your cheeks. “whatever’s weighing on you, you don’t have to carry it all,” he’d say, his voice low but certain. “not alone.” he’d press your hand to his chest, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat grounding you. “feel that? as long as this is going, you’ve got me.”

he’d bring you water, guiding the glass to your lips if your hands are trembling too much to hold it yourself. “small sips,” he’d murmur, the pad of his thumb brushing over your cheek. “there you go, baby. good job.” and when you’ve had enough, he’d set it aside, wrapping his arms around you again, pulling you to sit in his lap. he’d rock you gently, one hand tracing slow patterns on your back, the other holding your head against his shoulder.

“tell me what happened,” he’d say. if you managed to speak then, even just a little—admitting how lost you felt, or how nothing seemed to be enough—his jaw would tighten imperceptibly, but he’d keep that soft edge for you, the one that made you feel like everything you said was being cradled carefully.

“you’re more than the worst thing that’s ever happened to you.” he’d say, squeezing your hand. “and you’re not just the sum of what you haven’t done, either.” his fingers would move, tracing the lines of your palm. “sometimes, surviving is enough. sometimes, it’s the best you can do—and that’s more than good enough.”

when the silence stretched between you, comfortable this time, he’d find little ways to anchor you. maybe he’d run a warm bath, not because he thought it’d fix everything, but because he knew the warmth might ease the tension from your muscles. he’d stay nearby, offering a washcloth or combing his fingers through your hair if you’d let him, the gestures quiet but full of love.

later, he’d help you change into fresh clothes—his old colombia hoodie, soft from years of wear—and make sure you had a bite to eat, even if it was just toast or a few crackers. “we’ll take it one step at a time from here,” he’d remind you, his voice still so calm, so grounding. “it doesn’t have to be everything at once. just one thing. and then the next.”

when you were ready to try sleeping, he’d pull you close again, his body warm and solid behind you. “there are going to be days that feel impossible,” he’d murmur, his lips brushing the shell of your ear. “days that make you think it’s never going to get better. but you don’t have to face them alone. even if all you can do is let one other person in—that is enough.”

masterlist — i recommend the “angst” or “fluff” tags if you haven’t already tried them ♡

[loveesiren]

Doing It All For Us (Pt. 12)

Masterlist

Rafe Cameron x Reader

Summary: Rafe and Y/n leave the Bahamas and have a chance to enjoy themselves.

Warnings: Language, fluff, smut

Word Count: 2.8k+

You wake up to Rafe peppering kisses to your swollen belly. "Goodmorning, angel," He whispers against your skin. "Did you sleep okay?"

"Mmmm, don't wanna get up." You whine. Rafe's bed was so comfy. The warm air that drifted in through the patio doors added to your comfort and you were suddenly sad this wasn't a real vacation to the Bahamas.

"I know baby, I'm sorry. I promise we'll come back here soon."

"Honeymoon?" You ask.

Rafe looks up at you, smile wide on his face. "Honeymoon." He confirms. "But first," He says as he climbs back up your body, letting his lips hover over yours. "I owe you a ring, my dear fiancee."

You smile, taking his face between your hands as your guide his lips to yours, savoring every second of the kiss with your fiance. You'd never get tired of saying that. Atleast until you got to call him your husband.

You lazily got ready, putting on some basic make up, some shorts, and one of Rafe's t-shirts. He carried your stuff to the truck and you made your way downstairs. You ate cereal while you watched Rafe, Ward, and the escorts load up the gold on to the truck.

You sat in between Ward and Rafe as you drove to the airport. Rafe had his arm lazily slung around your shoulder as he leaned his head against yours.

Suddenly, a bunch of kids were running out in front of the trucks causing you all to stop.

"What the hell is this?" Ward asked.

"Oh, God, it's just some kids," Rafe said. "Move! Get out of the way!" He began yelling out the window.

Something didn't feel right. This was a trap.

"It's a trap!" One of the escorts yelled. You turned around to see men approaching your vehicle.

"We gotta go!" You yell.

Ward pulls out around the other trucks and takes off through an alley. "Where are we going?! Find where we are!" He yells at Rafe.

"Alright, alright, alright!" Rafe responds, looking at his phone. "This road goes to the same place just keep going."

"What the fuck was that?!" You ask as you tried to steady your breathing. You didn't realize you were clinging to Rafe's shirt until he pulled you into him. He wrapped protective arms around you as he looked out the window for a sign of anyone following you.

"Stay on this road, it will take us directly to the airport." Rafe says.

"Oh, what the fuck..." You mutter as you see the barrels and workers blocking the road ahead.

"Are you kidding me?" Ward says. "Get the gun, Rafe."

Rafe reaches for the glove box, pulling the gun out and tucking it in the back of his waist band. You swallow. You still hated guns but you'd been around them much more recently. Rafe gives you an apologetic look and you just nod, letting him know you trust him.

The people that approach the truck pull a gun on Ward and a knife on Rafe. Noticing you're pregnant, the man pulls you out of the car too, pushing you forward with Ward so he can keep the gun on both of you.

"Please don't hurt her!" Rafe begs, keeping his eyes on you.

"Shut up!" The woman spits at Rafe. "Move these to the side of the road."

Ward and Rafe begin moving the barrels and are forced on the ground. "You too, Princess!" He yells at you.

"I-I can't lay on my stomach," You say, keeping your hands up.

"On your knees then!"

You glance over at Rafe. You could see him trying to swallow his anger. You pleaded with your eyes for him not to try anything stupid.

"Go, go!" You hear the man yell.

You turn around and your jaw drops as you see Sarah and John B running to the truck.

"Sarah?" Ward yells. "Sarah, baby, you're alive!" He was standing up now. "You're alive, baby, I can't believe it! I love you!"

You see John B raise his gun as Ward moves closer to him and Sarah. Before he could pull the trigger, Rafe fires his gun. You watch as the bullet hits Sarah in the stomach.

The man hits Ward in the head with his gun, causing him to fall to the ground before he turns the gun on you. The woman had a gun pointed at Rafe now and you couldn't help the tears of fear that fell from your eyes.

John B and Sarah drove off with the gold and the two people holding you captive got in their own truck and drove off as your escorts made their way down the road.

Rafe ran to you, wrapping you tightly in his arms. "Are you okay?" He whispered against your hair. You nod in response, trying to muffle your sobs against his chest. "It's okay, baby girl, I got you."

"Fuck, I'm sorry Y/N-" Ward began. He was quickly cut off by Rafe shaking his head. Now wasn't the time.

-

You were taken back to the police station while they tried to locate the gold. You clung tightly to Rafe as Ward gushed about seeing Sarah. "It was her, right? It was her?"

"It was her, yeah..." Rafe responded.

"She's alive," Ward smiles. "I don't know what the hell you were doing though, shooting a gun right at her. You're just lucky you didn't hit her."

"I did. I did hit her."

"You shot Sarah?!"

"I was trying to shoot John B, okay? It was an accident. She stepped in the way. I did not mean to shoot her."

"Okay, okay, okay. I'm sorry." Ward says.

"But I don't care that I did."

You look up at Rafe as the words leave his lips. "Rafe, that is your sister!" Ward scolds him.

"Sister? The one who stole from us? The one who had her boyfriend pointing a gun at us, dad!" Rafe shot back.

An officer came in and handed Ward his phone, showing him a picture of Sarah and John B. You tune them out as you keep your gaze on Rafe. He turns to look at you and you can see a darkness in his eyes. Something was wrong and it made you nervous.

-

Ward had gotten two hotel rooms while the police looked for the gold. You sat on the bed and flipped on the tv while Rafe paced around the room.

"Rafe, what's going on?" You ask. You could tell shit was starting to get to him.

"I'm not okay..." He finally said. Sitting down on the edge of the bed and running his fingers through his hair. "I don't know how much more of this shit I can take...I feel like I'm losing my mind."

"Rafey..." You say softly, crawling over to him and climbing in his lap. He accepts you needily, pulling you close as he sniffles into your shoulder. He keeps one arm wrapped around you and brings his other palm to your swelling belly. You can feel his shoulders relax as he he breathes in your scent and feels his child growing inside of you.

"I want to be okay...for you and Wolf..."

"You will be, my love. Once we get the gold back...We'll get a place of our own..." You speak softly, raking your fingers through his shaggy hair as he leans into you. "We can paint Wolfie's room together...what color do you think he'll like?" You ask, trying to soothe your fiance.

"Purple..." He mumbles into your neck. "With dinosaurs."

You chuckle. "Of course he'll have dinosaurs."

You bit back tears as you held your sweet boy in your arms. You knew he was struggling and you wished so badly you could take that pain from him. You just wanted to marry Rafe, have your son, and live a normal life. But now you were tangled in this huge mess. Rafe was falling apart, you were almost six months pregnant. Ward was no help to his son. Sarah and her Pogue boyfriend were just toxic. You needed to step up and save your family.

You laid down with Rafe, running your long nails through his hair as you listened to the hotel TV play in the background. The sun began to set and Rafe drifted off to sleep.

You carefully took his arms off of you and crawled out of bed. You tried your best to be quiet as you made your way out of the room and headed towards Ward's room. You were surprised to find Ward already on his way to your room.

"Where's Rafe?" He questioned.

"He's asleep. He's not doing well..."

"What do you mean?"

"This shit is getting to him. What he's done...to Peterkin...to Sarah...All this...chaos." You say, gesturing at nothing. "He's not okay, Ward. And I really need him to be okay. Wolf needs him to be okay."

Ward sighed and looked down, offering a small nod. "You're right," He says, placing his hands on his hips. "You're right. Listen...I just got the call. We got the gold back. When we get home and I sort out all the little details, I'm going to set you and Rafe up with a fourth of it-"

"A third." You demanded.

"Y/n, I-"

"You wouldn't have it if it wasn't for Rafe. All the trauma falls on him. He's going to need therapy. We're going to need a house for our baby."

"But your dad-"

"I'll talk to my dad. What's important is that Rafe is okay and ready to be a father to his son. Your grandson."

Ward thinks for a second before nodding. You were calling the shots. You always did.

"By the way..." You added. "Rafe proposed."

Ward's eyes went wide as he turned to look at you. "You guys are-"

"Inlove. Pregnant. Killers. The least we can do is tie the knot and be a real family. I love your son. He's perfect. You've always been too focused on Sarah to realize that Rafe always has your back. But now he's going to be my husband and Wolf's father you'll have to fend for yourself. We need him now. We're his family. Wolfie comes first."

You could see Ward's eyes begin to water as he registered your words. You were right. You were completely right. Rafe always had his father's back. But now Rafe was going to be a father himself and he was going to put you and Wolf over everything. Including his own dad.

Ward nodded, biting back tears. "I'm going to make sure everything is set for our flight tomorrow. I'll see you two in the morning, okay?"

You nod your head as Ward walks past you. You move to go back to your room.

"And Y/n," Ward turns back to look at you.

You look over to meet his gaze.

"Wolf always comes first." He offers a small smile. "Rafe is going to be a great father."

You smile, placing a hand on your swollen belly. "Yeah, he really is." You agree before pushing the door open and heading back into your room to join Rafe in bed.

-

The flight home was a blessing. No nausea, no vomiting. You rested peacefully in Rafe's lap. When you arrived back in the OBX you and Rafe opted to go to your house. You wanted to be holed up in your room with your fiance for a few days.

"I'm gonna shower. Join me?" You asked, cheeky smile plastered on your face as you stripped out of your clothes.

Rafe bit his lip as he admired your naked body, perfectly tan and swelling with his child. "Go start it, I'll be in in just a minute, yeah?"

You giggle and run off to the bathroom.

Rafe leans over and grabs his phone, opening up the group text that lacked your number.

I proposed to Y/n

He pressed send and chewed on his thumb as he waited for a reply from your friends. He listened as the shower turned on and you stepped inside, overly excited to join you.

Courtney: WHAT?!

Kelce: When????

Topper: Holy shit

Rafe read the messages and began typing.

A lot to explain. A lot I need help with. Didn't even give her a ring yet. Court, help me pick one out?

C: Duh!! Meet me on the mainland tomorrow at 3. Top, Kelce, distract Y/n?

T & K: On it.

Rafe smiled, excited that your friends were so ready to help. He tossed his phone to the side before hopping up and running to the bathroom to join you.

"Aphrodite..." He cooed as he stepped into the shower and wrapped his arms around you, cupping your belly and leaning his face into your neck. "So perfect..."

You smiled, reaching back to lace your fingers through his hair. You felt so close to him as you placed your other hand over his on your belly. You needed him closer though.

"How are you feeling, my love?" You ask him. He hums happily into your hair as he rocks you back and forth. You smile, finding peace in knowing that, for right now, he's okay.

"Wanna make love to you..." He mumbles.

You bite your lip at his words, knowing you're about to get the gentle side of Rafe. As much as you loved him fucking you into oblivion, you also loved how slow and gentle he was when he really wanted to show you how much you meant to him.

He helped to clean you, getting all the spots you couldn't reach with your growing belly. You took your time washing him too, just enjoying the feeling of his naked body against yours.

When you finished your shower, Rafe stepped out and grabbed you your towel, wrapping you up in it and helping you dry off.

He picked you up bridal style and carried you back to your bed. He laid you down gently and hovered over you. He was hard, precum already dripping from his tip as he scanned your clean body. "So fucking beautiful..." He mumbled, placing soft kisses across your chest. "Never seen such a beautiful creature in my life..."

You hummed at his words, silently begging for him to touch you.

"How can I make you feel good, mama?" He asked, the vibration of his voice against your skin was intoxicating.

"Touch me, Rafe..."

Rafe smiled, bringing a soft thumb to your clit and circling slowly. You felt his index finger run up your entrance, collecting the juices that flowed so effortlessly out of your body.

He leaned his forehead against yours as he continued to thumb your clit. "So wet, my pretty girl..."

You could feel the twist in your stomach begin to form as he brushed over your throbbing clit.

"Ra-"

Rafe pulled his hand away, watching you almost come undone underneath him.

You whimpered at the sudden loss of connection. "Rafe, please..."

"Don't worry, baby girl. I'm going to make you cum. Just want you to cum on my dick, yeah?"

You nod your head, squeezing your eyes shut. "Need you, Rafe...please...please..." You beg.

"Awh, baby..." He whispers, running a thumb over the soft skin of your cheek bone. "You need me to make you feel good, huh?"

You knew this was feeding his ego but you didn't care. It was true. Your core was aching. You needed him inside you. "Hurts Rafey...please...need you...daddy..."

He groans at that. He was weak when you called him that.

"Anything you want, my angel..." He whispers, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you close to him and slowly pushing his cock inside you.

Your jaw falls open at the sensation of him stretching you out. You would never get used to his size.

"Feel okay, baby?" He asks.

"Mhmm," You moan.

Rafe begins to move slowly, pulling out of you and pushing back in. He moved so slow that you could feel everything, every inch of his skin filling you and your walls were already fluttering around him.

"You are ecstasy..." He whispers, thrusting into you slowly again. "Never felt so amazing...so in love...handcrafted by God herself...I'm so lucky....so in love....so...so...in love...."

You could feel tears escaping from your eyes at his words. He made love to you with so much emotion, so much love. He made you feel like you were the only two that existed, floating through time and space as one.

You didn't realize you were crying now, letting out a whimper into his shoulder.

He wrapped a hand around your thigh and brought your leg up, thrusting a little harder to hit you just right. "That's it baby...cum for me, my beautiful girl..."

You cried loudly as you released around his cock, the sensation was almost overwhelming. Rafe stayed buried inside you as you squirted on his stomach. His absolute favorite thing. Sending him into his own orgasm, you could feel his warmth filling you up and the sensation calmed you.

You finally met Rafe's eyes and you noticed the slight tears forming there.

"Why are you crying baby?" He asked you, forehead pressed to yours as he smiled at you.

"I-I just love-love you so fucking m-much..." You whimpered. The feelings you had for this man were so overwhelming you couldn't help but cry.

He reached a hand up and cupped your face as a tear fell from his eye too. "My pretty girl..." He whispered, pressing a kiss to your nose. "The moon, the stars, the planets, the heavens...you outshine all of them. You are the most divine creation. I'm not worthy to even be in your presence."

"Rafe-"

"Shhh...Aphrodite. Sleep my love."

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