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ellieputellas · 1 day ago
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Soft and lazy morning sex with Alexia? R is aussie and a part of the Matildas. She's just come back to barca after being with the national team for national camp.
breakfast | alexia x matildas!reader
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tags: minors dni, fluffy smut, matildas!reader, established relationship, cunnilingus r!receiving, fingering r!receiving, inspired by the recent match haha, request basically says it all hence no summary, inspired by the friendly match against brazil, not proofread lol | wc: 1k+
masterlist | do not repost or plagiarize!
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The friendly against Brazil had left your body sore and aching with every muscle protesting even the smallest movement. The grueling match had been tough, and the painfully long flight back to Barcelona did nothing to alleviate the aches.
By the time you got back home in the afternoon, Alexia was still out at the physio, working on her minor leg injury. As much as you wanted to wait for your girlfriend to come back and force her to try all your favorite childhood snacks from Australia, your body betrayed you. As soon as you showered and you let your body hit the bed, you fell asleep instantly
It wasn't until several hours of deep, undisturbed slumber later that you were awakened by the soft series of fluttery kisses on your bare shoulder. Blinking groggily, you were met with the golden light of late morning spilling into the room.
“Cariño,” Alexia’s soft voice vibrated behind you. It was warm and steady, breaking through the quiet. “Time to wake up, my love.”
You blinked again, half-aware of the strong arms wrapped around your waist and her body pressing snugly against your back as she spooned you.
“C’mon, cariño, you have to wake up,” she murmured, her lips brushing against your temple. “You were out cold when I got home last night. You didn't even flinch when I loudly announced that I brought your favorite takeout.”
You mumbled something incoherent, still too sleepy to understand anything she was saying. Though subconsciously, your body moved closer to hers, pressing your back against her front. Alexia chuckled, the sound low and affectionate.
“Poor sleepy baby,” she cooed as her hand lazily traced lines up and down on your arm. “I ordered us your favorite breakfast. You gotta get up, sleepyhead.”
“Mmm, five more minutes…” You groaned, slightly annoyed. You were always a bit grumpy whenever being woken up. But you were just extra moody now, especially after that horrid game and the excruciating travel that followed. You just wanted to melt into the bed and stay fast asleep for a couple more days.
Alexia hummed softly, her lips ghosting over your ear. “If I give you five more minutes, you’ll just ask for five more.” She teased. "You gotta get up, baby. Or else, I'll have to wake you up myself."
Without waiting for a response, she leaned forward and started peppering kisses along your jawline, moving to your neck with slow, deliberate affection. Her lips lingered just enough to make you squirm, a soft whimper escaping your lips as you unconsciously moved closer to you.
Alexia's warm hands found their way under your shirt, tenderly grazing your breast. You hummed as your breathing grew heavier. Alexia's fingers were suddenly on your nipples, delicately rolling them around her fingers.
You moaned at the sensation, still barely awake.
"Still sleepy?" Alexia asked in between kisses. You responded a satisfied hum, stuck in that state between asleep and awake. She chuckled as she propped herself up.
She let your back fall flat on the mattress as she hovered above you from her side, kissing your neck deeper. Your eyes started fluttering open at the feeling of her gentle nibbles.
Before you could even mentally process what was happening, muscle memory had taken over and your hands were guiding Alexia to move herself in between your legs, which you had just spread apart to accommodate her.
"Hmm, Alexia..." You hummed as you wrapped your arm around the Catalan who continued to kiss you on the neck. Her lips started moving slowly down to your collarbones before she lifted up your shirt, exposing your bare chest.
"So pretty for me," You didn't know if Alexia was talking about you or your chest but you were still in the process of waking up to even think about it.
Your back arched as you felt her lips carefully wrap around your nipples, wetting them with her mouth. You moaned as she used her tongue pointedly to flick against it. "Keep going," you urged.
Alexia nodded as she continued to suck on your breast as her hand snaked to in between your legs, cupping your tenderness through your shorts. "Hmm," she said before pulling away. "Someone's already excited."
Your eyes opened to see your girlfriend's teasing expression. "Alexia, please just..." you trailed off, at a loss for words. "Do a better job of waking me up."
She chuckled at your impatience. "So fiesty, cariño." She teased before connecting her lips with your breast again. This time, her hand pushed under your shorts and underwear, fingers slowly finding your warmth.
Alexia moved her mouth back to yours, kissing you as she cautiously drew wide circles around your clit. You wrapped your arms around her as you moved your hips against her hand.
"Shh, sshh," Alexia hushed. "Let me take care of you."
She pulled away and steadied your hips from moving before sitting up to take your bottoms off. Alexia bit her lip, stiffling her own moan as she saw your wetness. "I missed this pretty pussy so much."
You smiled as you saw the hunger in Alexia's eyes grow. It wasn't long before the Catalan had her head in between your legs, using her tongue to lap you up eagerly as if she was starving and you were sweet nectar.
You moaned as you felt her tongue firmly push the hood of your clit back, grazing against the sensitive areas. "Alexia, I want more please," you begged but Alexia ignored you, doing things her way.
As her mouth wrapped around your clit to form a suction, you felt one of her fingers graze against your opening. You whimpered as Alexia carefully push it inside you, feeling you tighten around her, driving her insane.
"Ale..." You moaned out as you felt her plunge deeper inside you, mouth still busy as it sucked slowly.
Her finger slowly pumped in and out of you slowly but precisely as her mouth alternated between sucking your clit and licking. You could feel your sore leg muscles cramp up as you felt the intensity of Alexia's touch ripple through your body, causing you to lay down one of your propped legs at an attempt to alleviate it.
That didn't seem to bother Alexia as she kept on satisfying you with her mouth. Feeling you become wetter, your juices soaking her fingers and chin, she decided to insert another inside of you. Alexia felt herself grow more and more aroused as she felt your tightness around her.
She lifted her head up for a moment. "Someone missed me," she teased.
You put your hand against her head, pushing her back down on your core. "Yes, Alexia, I missed you so much." Your words came out raggedy and heavy. "So, so fucking much."
She chuckled, her laugh vibrating against your core. You were about to scold her for chuckling at your eagerness but before you could even react, Alexia quickened her pace, pumping in and out of you deeper and faster.
A series of incoherent expletives and moans escaped your mouth as your girlfriend fucked you with her fingers, curling so often against the sensitive spot inside of you. Your mouth dropped open, as you gasped for air, feeling overwhelmed by the sensation.
Suddenly, the familiar four-toned notification bell chirped, cutting between your moans. Alexia ignored it until it chirped again minutes. She glanced at her phone to see the vague sight of a Deliveroo notification. Your breakfast had arrived.
You weren't paying attention to anything, feeling the pleasure overwhelm you, rendering all your senses useless. The pleasure started to grow from inside you, developing into the familiar onset of an orgasm.
"Alexia," You moaned. "I'm so close."
Bzzz. Bzzz. The phone buzzed.
"Alexia, keep going." Bzz bzzz.
And as you were about to reach your peak, your girlfriend abruptly pulled away, causing you to violently open your eyes. You looked over to her as she grabbed her phone.
"Babe, what the fuck, I was so close." You whined, feeling annoyed.
She chuckled. "It's your breakfast, cariño." Alexia explained. "The Deliveroo driver's been trying to notify us that he's here already."
You groaned. "You could have made me cum at least!"
A teasing glint sparkled in your girlfriend's hazel eyes. "Never promised I would.” She smirked. "I just said I'd wake you up and… you're awake now."
You groaned as she planted a kiss on your forehead before walking out the room. With much annoyance, you shouted after her. "This doesn't mean you're done here!"
"Yes!" She called out, already on her way to the front door. "I always finish my breakfast."
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a/n: writing my long angst fic has been tiring and this request has been in my inbox for a while so i decided to give it a shot. felt inspired by the recent match actually haha! (also i KNOW this wasnt part of my initial WIP list but i just got randomly inspired)
also i just typed this up quickly on my phone and probably took longer to make the dividers and to edit out raso's name from her jersey than i did writing this so excuse any mistakes and errors. i hope u all still like it!
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caffeinatedmunchkin · 18 hours ago
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WIP Whenever
Thank you so much for the tag @verbenaa !!✨ your WIP is, as with everything you post, supreme. Go read it right now it’s so good! Run don’t walk trUsT me
Being two Emmrich fics in now I guess it’s safe to say this is just where I’m at 🤷‍♀️ I haven’t been this consistently inspired in a while, so I’m running with it. Please forgive me that I’m throwing more Emmrook your way lol
This is from a oneshot I’m working on that is maybe kind of an out there idea, idk, I’m not gonna fight it. Still very much in the early, rough draft phase - a little bit suggestive and a lotta bit angsty under the cut 🙂‍↕️
With the first bite melting against his tongue, he stilled. His expression one of anguish, he stared either directly into her - or through her - she wasn't certain. But it made little difference.
He didn't see her, or whatever it was he zeroed in on. Ever alert and keenly observant, Emmrich looking lost as he did sank her heart into the pit of her stomach.
"That bad?" She offered with a single brow teased in hesitation as she steeled herself. Keeping her tone even and light, he flinched upon hearing her words, and her panic spiked.
Shutting his eyes, a harsh exhale flared his nostrils. And then nothing. Wound so tight and frozen stiff, not even his broad chest rose and fell with the rhythm of breaths.
She had tempered expectations. Of course it would pale in comparison to his mother’s, but surely her efforts would be appreciated, no matter how amateurish her attempt.
However he remained rigid and aloof. It stirred resignation to bubble up her throat and spill between them like a pot boiled over. Rushing to distance herself from the flicker of hope that she succeeded, only to retreat to forgone failure.
Much more familiar to her, she burrowed in that comfort and sought shelter. "I know its not quite the same, but I did tr-,"
Breaking himself out of the reticence that held him captive, without addressing her - or even glancing her way - he began to maul the slice. Wolfing it down like a man starved, he hunched over in his seat, such as hound seeks to hide their bone from prying eyes before they gnaw it to shreds and marrow.
Ricochetting the fork back and forth between his mouth and the plate, not a hint of deviation - or pause - in his course.
His heart felt like it was squeezed in a chest that pulled against it, intent to cave in. He didn't come up for air, not that his lungs would be able to suck it in against his body's constricting. Every part of him felt heavy and aching; the sore fatigue of succumbing to grief, after ignoring it for longer than it would tolerate. The clinking of metal against the china was all the noise between them.
"Oh-" escaped her in a quiet squeak. So quiet, he recognized it wasn't meant to be playful or teasing. He had startled her, just as he had himself.
Emmrich felt her intent gaze surround him with his every hurried inhale. On occasion, little muted whines of his were shook loose, before they were able to be strangled by his deprived mastication. With every one that rattled from his cavernous need he scrambled to fill with what she made for him, the wider her eyes grew.
And the hotter her cheeks.
And Emmrich kept eating.
His throat felt thick, and his molars buzzed. His head felt hazy from the rush of sugar, but it couldn't keep him from going in for more. Until every crumb was devoured. Until his fork scratched empty plate. Only then he used the flat of it to scrape up the smears of leftover frosting, and sucked it clean from the tines.
He didn't indulge in sweets often, not in a long while. And never like this.
It was like just his mother’s, and it wasn't.
So different from how he remembered, yet it warmed him from the inside out, just as it did when he was a boy.
He noticed her decision to use the rum and coffee in the icing, in place of the orange extract; a preference of his mother’s in which her faithfulness was strict.
It tasted like Ariadne. Her bite. How she burned down his throat and boiled in his stomach. A heady delight tinged with the inescapable aftertaste of regret.
Her heavy-hand, and decadence.
Her affection for him, overwhelming as it was unapologetic.
He didn't need his mother’s torte. He needed hers. And now that he got a taste; he was ravenous.
No pressure tags! @khywren @xxnashiraxx @vangbelsing @obsessedwhyyes @chaoticbardlady99 and whoever else wants to join in!! 💕
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simfunnyyt · 1 day ago
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Jake managed to convince his social media hating, because as she put it, it's a "toxic drama filled dumpster fire", girlfriend Tati to join him for his brand deal with @serenity-cc for their LIFT fitness clothing line Black Friday sale campaign.
In Tati's defense she only agreed because he was wearing her legs like a hat when he asked 😅.
It's also the first time the bartender/trust fund baby/personal trainer/ fitness influencer is revealing his 2 month long relationship to his 9.3 million followers 😳. Shit is about to hit the fan and here's why...
Story Lore Incoming:
For those of you who haven't seen Tati's LP on YouTube, 6 months ago Tati (30) got divorced from her high school sweetheart Thomas (31) (who is a famous basketball player) that she had been with for 15 years after she came home on her 30th birthday to find him cheating on her. And this was at a time when Tati was at her lowest because of a miscarriage after years of struggling with infertility. The miscarriage made her fall into a deep depression and gain a lot of weight.
After catching him cheating Tati demanded a divorce, so Thomas kicked her out onto the street with nothing but the clothes on her back and 20 simoleons in her bank account. That night she took her last 20 to a bar to drink away her sorrows, and that's where she met Jake (28) 🥰 while he was waiting to start his shift at the bar.
Jake gave her the pep talk she needed to motivate her to turn her life around. So she found a homeless shelter, got a job at a fast food joint, and started training with Jake (who she had no idea was a famous fitness influencer or a rich trust fund baby lol) to lose weight. And just 4 months later she had lost 60lbs, got promoted to manager at her job, and was living in a motel so she could have her own space while she saved up for an apartment. She was doing great!
That is until she had met up with her friends & family after not seeing them for a year, and her dirt bag ex husband decided to crash the reunion. They spent the whole time arguing and HE accused HER of cheating. THE NERVE!!!! Tati was furious after the encounter.
So in order to cheer her up Jake and her two bestfriends since childhood Lana (30) & Ava (29) took her to the club. Tati & Jake got FUCKED UP that night. All that licqa & weed in their system led to some flirting, that led to some bumpin' n grindin' on the dance floor, that led to some naked shenanigan in Tati's motel room.
The next morning instead of feeling regret for their drunken hookup, they talked about their secret crushes on each other and decided to give their relationship a go! Now 2 months later we are at the present day with this social media post to Jake's 9.3 million followers revealing his relationship with Tati. Unfortunately for Tati, Jakes followers are filled with a lot of sports fans who recognized her, despite her not having social media, as their favorite ball players ex-wife from the few times Thomas posted her on his social pages, posts he still hasn't deleted by the way.....odd.
Jake's post is going crazy viral. With people tagging Thomas, and gossip blogs "suggesting" that given how quick Tati got in a new relationship after the divorce she must have been cheating on Thomas with Jake this whole time, which must be the reason why they divorced.
Thomas has seen the post and he is PISSED for two reasons. One, because she looks so damn good, and two because he hates how fast she moved on. Mind you, this fool had been cheating on her for 2 years & she caught him on her BIRTHDAY. If that wasn't bad enough he accidentally got that bimbo is pregnant (she poked holes in the condom 😖) with his kid, but he's paying her to keep it hush hush because he had hopes of winning Tati back (give him a first class ticket to deluluville!). Now he's on a war path to ruin them.
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dawnthefluffyduck · 5 months ago
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New game interest unlocked
(crow in bottom right belongs to @patchwork-crow-writes)
#ramarl#phantasy star online#long tag warning lol i rambled#so i was introduced to phantasy star online#i think its safe to say i really enjoy the game#thank you mr crow for showing me this game :D i have new creatures to scribble now#there shall be more of these doodles#i promise you that#meant to post this wayyyyy earlier today but uh#my car broke down :') ....again :')#last week it wouldn't turn on and the headlights weren't working so we were like ''ok this is a battery issue and i need a new one''#because jumping the car didnt fix it#so we took my old battery to a shop and they tested its charge before showing us which new one we should get#but the battery had charge???????? so we went back home to troubleshoot#and then found the hooks(?idk what they're called) that connected the battery to the car had something corroded on them#so we grabbed a can of coke and scrubbed away#hooked the battery back up and bam car was working#so the issue was those hooks#until two days ago when my car didnt work again#looked at the battery again and the hooks came loose; tightened them up and bam car working again#and now at this point I'm scared to go anywhere cause what if i get stranded on my own??#so this morning i said ''alright I'm gonna drive myself to church just to be sure that my car works''#AND WOULD YOU GUESS WHAT HAPPENED#at this point i just wish the damn battery was dead and that i could replace it and move on from this#i know they're a bit pricey but jesus this is exhausting#but i can't just buy a new battery if im not sure that's the actual problem because then I'd have a battery and nothing to do with it#i hate having a car sometimes i just want a bus system#or a jeep#but preferably a bus system#sorry rambles thats a long way of saying i didnt post this earlier because ive been working on my car lol
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fairy-ganj-mother · 2 months ago
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managing your parents emotions is so exhausting
#eldest daughter#lol#my stepdad made me yell and cry and now i'm 16 years old again and scared and confused#he insulted me unprovoked publicly/on my front lawn and in onslaught and my mother did nothing to defend me#probably been happening my whole life and I haven't been able to figure it out until it was on my turf#yelled at me that i had no common sense and was stupid because i didn't put down grass seed#i have a degree in soil science and a fucking plan but he didn't want to hear any of that#just wanted to insult me loudly on my front lawn unprovoked after raking up all my leaves without being asked to#(i intended to mulch and leave them as ground cover... to protect the soil.........which he was yelling at me because the soil is uncovered#then he mowed the weeds down to the soil#and yelled at me that my bare soil was all going to blow away#BRO YOU MADE IT BARE#yelled 'it screams lack of common sense'#becuase I didn't plant grass FIRST THING when we moved in#our house wasn't livable INSIDE when we bought it and now it's great and we worked hard so we had other fucking priorities#also I seeded cover crop and it didn't germinate bc it needed more water than I could give it in CO#like grass lawn is the past and unsustainable and I'm not interested and I'm planning on seeding clover but not 2 days before the frost????#so annoying#and like he's still a parental figure right so that's like just an awful layer to have in this bc he's such an immature bully#and I forgot to have my trauma senses turned on to know his emotions before he does in my own home so he got me#didn't even get into the whole my moms lack of defense of me part#fuck this shit#t#at least ranting in my tags usually helps me stop crying
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mishtershpock · 7 months ago
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#okay i’m gonna try to keep this short and sweet. 30 tag maximum you are my nemesis lol#my main issue here is not necessarily that the karaoke and other bach party scenes have likely been cut#it’s more that they’re clearly buddie baiting for engagement#journalists were watching the episode as early as saturday. which means the ep was ready by at least this time last week#so they knew that the scenes had been cut. and they chose to continue including it in promotion and interviews#i KNOW that logically the reason they chose those scenes to cut was because they’re less important. and we’d already seen them#they technically already gave us the clips in the promo videos. right? so bye bye#but that’s bullshit. sorry#they used buddie best friendism content as a way to promote the ep and increase hype#and then they just pull it out from under us the day before it airs#this is a madney episode. madney are getting married. buddie having fun is not the most important thing here. i get it#so why did they not promote something else? you’re telling me there was NOTHING ELSE they could’ve used?#nothing else from the episode that was free of big spoilers? at all???#it’s madney’s episode but they chose to promote one clip of buddie talking to maddie. one of chim crawling. and the bach party stuff#they must know that people would focus on the bach party. buddie is beloved buck and eddie are beloved#what were they expecting??#they used buddie as a pairing as bait. not queer bait and not even ship bait i suppose as there was nothing ‘shippy’ shown#but they baited buddie content. that’s literally what’s happened#i would be more understanding if this wasn’t a regular occurrence. it’s normal sure. shows do this all the time with fan faves#but also it is a false reflection of the episode. even journalists are saying the episode is not what they expected from the promo#it honestly feels like they’ve made fools of us. maybe the episode will air and it’ll be better than expected#but i don’t have much hope not much hope for buddie. not much hope for madney getting what they deserve. ZERO hope for eddie’s 7b storyline#frankly i’m expecting b/t to be the main chat after this ep. which is……. anyway#i’m not really liking s7 so far and i feel gaslit when people say it’s great lol#IN MY OPINION it is choppy and too fast and a little ooc and doesn’t make a lot of sense#they didn’t even green light bi!buck until episode. what. 2/3??#so presumably had to change everything from then on#i know that’s partly down to limited episode numbers but… 3 eps for the cruise (unnecessary) but 1 for madney wedding? ok#sigh. if anyone’s read this far pls don’t come for me ok. these are just my opinions#we’re all entitled to them. i’m sad for madney and i’m sad for buddie best friendism and i’m sad for s7 as a whole right now
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spencerreidenjoyer · 5 months ago
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insatiable | spencer reid x reader
Spencer learns how amazing sex is with you, but gets caught up with work. You show your boyfriend how good it can feel even if you’re not together physically, and he shows you how much he misses you when he gets back.
part 1 - addicted to you | part 2
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wc: 4.6k, rating: 18+/explicit
tags/warnings: established relationship, phone sex/video sex, mutual masturbation, public (bathroom) sex, brief mentions of typical BAU stuff (not in detail), meeting the family (literally reader meets the BAU), brief mentions of alcohol, making out, vaginal sex, getting caught (not in the act but afterward lmao)
a/n: this is what an insane person does when they're sick for two days and have nothing better to do over the summer. this is a second part to addicted to you (you don't have to read the first part but it does provide some context for some details within the fic), with inspiration taken from a lovely comment I got on ao3 that made me feel kinda crazy. i included some textfic elements in this fic as well which i hope reads well (bold text is spencer)! also I know early seasons spencer technically sets this around 2005-2007 but they have smartphones and video calling (aka present day) so please suspend your disbelief for the length of this fic lmao (p.s this fic is also on ao3!)
Your boyfriend gets whisked away for work sooner than you expect. Spencer’s supposed to have time off the rest of this week, but you suppose killers aren’t exactly respectful of an FBI agent’s time off of work. It’s downright cruel when he’s called in to work on a Friday evening, when you have dinner and wine set at the table, having gotten ready to spend a quiet, romantic evening in with Spencer. 
“I’m so sorry,” he says, rushing to change out of his sweatshirt and joggers into his typical work attire. You stand in the doorway of his room, mildly amused while Spencer panics to put an outfit together. “I know you had a whole evening in planned, but–”
“Don’t be, baby,” you assure him. “You have a killer to catch. Oh, that one– the blue cardigan looks good with those pants. It matches your socks.”
Spencer smiles as he looks up at you, reaching for the navy blue cardigan to his left. He tugs it on rather hurriedly, comes up to you and presses a kiss to your forehead. “You’re the best. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.”
You shake your head. “Just find the bastard quick and come home to me.”
“I know. I will,” Spencer says.
After the both of you found out just how much Spencer liked fucking you, you were really hoping that your weekend together could be spent in his bed, but duty calls. Technically, JJ had called him in, but you’re not concerned about specifics right now.  
You spend the evening alone in Spencer’s apartment, half of the wine finished and his TV playing reruns of some show you haven’t been paying attention to. Your eyelids feel heavy, and Spencer’s bed is so comfortable you can’t bring yourself to leave it. That is, until your phone buzzes on Spencer’s nightstand, and you’re suddenly very alert.
I miss you, darling. > hey, i’m surprised you have the down time to text. i miss you too I’m really sorry I had to leave so suddenly. We’re on the jet right now.  > i told you it’s okay! i’m surprised the jet has wifi lol Taxpayer money, I guess? We land in LA in a couple of hours and we’re heading straight to the PD to work on the case. > my poor boyfriend is working so hard instead of cuddling me in bed :( How you tempt me, lovely. I’ll be back as soon as I can. Are you going to sleep soon? It’s late. > yeah i’m staying at yours for the night and maybe until you get back? really miss you already Okay, that’s good. I know. I’ll call when I’m in the hotel and settled for the day? :-( > yes please. also stop sending emojis with noses they aren’t supposed to look like that!!! They aren’t anatomically correct without them. The way you send them > babe they’re emojis it’s ok if they’re not anatomically correct Hahaha I love you. > lol i love you too! Goodnight, love. > goodnight spence <3 <3
You can imagine, especially from the way Spencer recounts it, how his coworker Derek must be teasing him about smiling at his phone, about how pretty boy’s lucky lady must be one hell of a woman to get Spencer so smitten. 
You would say you’re rather independent, especially in relationships, but Spencer has you acting like a clingy girlfriend. You can’t help but feel an ache in your chest as you long for him while he’s away, feeling like a military wife whose husband is out instead of being normal. To be fair, being with Spencer has never been “normal” – he always has something interesting up his sleeve, or some quirk that makes you even more enamoured with him. 
Your Saturday is relatively uneventful, milling about Spencer’s apartment. You laze around in bed for way too long, enough where Spencer would’ve definitely hauled you out of bed himself an hour ago if he were here. You make yourself breakfast, unsurprised that Spencer only has cereal in his pantry and almond milk in his fridge. You sit down with one of his very sophisticated literature books but you don’t get very far with it, and opt to clean Spencer’s apartment instead. 
It’s when you’re sweeping the floor that you realise just how much you like Spencer, feeling so strongly attached to him already. You’ve said your ‘I love you’s, given him his firsts. You were staying in his apartment even while he was away– hell, you’re even cleaning his apartment for him. 
Just for a moment, you let yourself fantasise about this being your apartment – yours and Spencer’s; about waking up to him every morning, about making breakfast for the both of you that isn’t cereal and almond milk, about coming home to each other instead of an empty apartment. 
You sigh and get back to cleaning.
You’re settled into his bed, surrounded by the comforting scent of him when Spencer finally does call. You almost drop your phone in your excitement to pick up. 
“Hey! Hi, Spence,” you say, unable to help the smile that’s forming on your face. 
“Hello, love,” Spencer answers. He sounds a little tired. You can imagine the little furrow in his brow, obviously exhausted and dissatisfied from a full day’s work of catching some bastard in LA, and you wish you could be there to kiss his frown away. “I miss you.”
“I miss you too, Spencer. Long day?”
“Absolutely,” Spencer sighs tiredly. “This UnSub is so slippery. No convictions, no paper trail, nothing, and he’s killing every other–” Spencer starts to ramble but he catches himself. “Sorry. I won’t talk about work right now. It’s pretty grim.”
“It’s okay,” you hum. “Do you want to talk about work right now?”
Spencer makes a little noise. “No, no. I don’t want to bring that to you. Let’s talk about you. How are you, honey?”
Honey. The name makes your insides feel all gooey, soft and warm and lovely. “I’m- I’m okay. I stayed at your place, cleaned up around here. I’m thankful it’s not as much of a man cave as I thought.”
Spencer laughs through the phone, a breathy chuckle. “Thank you for cleaning up for me, love. It’s just a lot of nerdy stuff, huh?”
“Yeah. It’s endearing. I tried to read one of your books earlier and could barely get past the first ten pages.” You tell him, garnering another chuckle from Spencer. “I like your place a lot.”
“I miss you,” Spencer says again. “Waking up to you and having you around is so much nicer than this dingy hotel room I’m in.”
“Aw. Taxpayer money couldn’t upgrade you to a better room?” 
Spencer snorts. “No, but I lucked out on getting the room all to myself.”
There’s a pause as you figure out what to say, and Spencer is quick to follow up, “I didn’t mean–”
“Does this have something to do with you missing me, baby?” You can’t help but grin. Spencer makes a distressed little noise over the line.
“Well, I– Maybe, but we don’t have to–” Spencer stammers, unable to find the words. He’s absolutely adorable. 
“I want to, Spence,” you coo. “I miss you so much.”
You hear Spencer exhale shakily. “What– What do I do?”
“A genius like you hasn’t forgotten how to touch himself, has he?” you tease, Spencer whining on the other end at your words. “Does that eidetic memory of yours come with an overactive imagination too?”
“Surprisingly, no. Hyperphantasia is more of being able to visualise different types of situations in one’s mind, and that’s what usually is associated with an overactive imagination. Having an eidetic memory is more about high-precision recall after seeing something even just once. I think having an eidetic memory pretty much ensures you don’t have aphantasia, or the inability to see and create mental images, but yeah.”
Ah, even his nerdy ramblings turn you on. 
“So does that mean you can recall the way I looked in bed a few nights ago?” you prod, and you wish you could see how red Spencer must be by now.
“Well, yes. Of course I can. How could I ever forget how beautiful you looked then?” Spencer’s words are sweet, earnest, and you melt. 
“Then picture that,” you barely get the words out because you’re so smitten. “Imagine I’m right there with you, Spencer.”
You hear the rustling of the sheets, and Spencer’s little telltale whine as he wraps his hand around himself. “O-Oh–”
“I miss you, Spence,” you drawl. “Miss the way your cock fits inside me. You miss my tight cunt, baby?”
“Your mouth is filthy,” Spencer laughs breathily. “But yeah, I do. You always feel so good around me.”
“You’re touching yourself, yeah?” you ask. You get a little whine from him as an affirmative, but your imagination is running wild – you want to see him. “Can you show me?”
“Yeah, I just– Do you wanna switch it over to a video call? I can’t–”
You laugh at your boyfriend’s lack of technical prowess, tapping at your phone screen until the top half of his face comes up. “Hey, I’m just trying to find a good angle–”
“Don’t just flip the camera and show me your dick, please. That would be so unsexy.” You say.
Spencer furrows his brows. “I was not planning on doing that, for the record.” 
You watch the phone move until Spencer comes into frame, the phone likely propped up at the foot of the bed and exposing all of Spencer to you. You might be drooling right now.
“This is… a lot,” Spencer laughs nervously. “I feel so naked.”
“You’re mostly clothed,” you quip. 
“Ha ha,” Spencer laughs dryly. “I’ve just… I’ve never done this before.”
“Phone sex? Or calling your girlfriend so you can jerk off for her?” 
Spencer gives you a deadpan look. “Both, honey.”
You grin. “I’m glad to be your first. Now, show me how you make yourself feel good, baby.”
Spencer’s cheeks are a gorgeous rosy red when he takes his cock into his hand again, his tip leaking as he strokes himself slowly. With his eyes fluttering shut, Spencer’s lips part as he indulges himself in his pleasure. Like this, you indulge yourself in admiring all of Spencer – the flush on his cheeks that runs down to his neck, his breathy panting as he touches himself to the thought of you.
“Spence,” you sigh. “You’re so pretty.”
His eyes shutter open as he looks at you, somehow even redder than he already was. “You’re the pretty one, darling. Are you– Will you touch yourself for me?”
You hold back your moan as you nod. You were already in your underwear when you had slid into Spencer’s bed, but now all it takes is you sliding your fingers past the waistband to feel how wet you already are between your legs. “Oh, Spence.”
“Do you feel good, love?” he hums, voice only a little bit strained from his immense pleasure. 
The embarrassingly loud squelch that results when you sink your fingers into yourself is enough of an answer. Spencer grins, and you’re red in the face as you rock your hips down onto your own fingers. “Shut up.”
“I didn’t say anything, honey,” Spencer laughs. “But I wish I could feel you right now.”
“I know, I miss the way you feel inside me,” you pant. “Please, Spencer–”
“Take off your underwear,” Spencer’s voice is breathy as he pleads with you. “I want to see you.”
You prop your phone up so your angle matches Spencer’s, both of you on full display for each other. You watch the way Spencer’s eyes widen when you slide your panties off, the way his eyes are trained on your figure through the screen. He says, “You’re so wet…”
“All for you, baby,” you sigh, leaning back as you slide two fingers back into yourself. You scissor them rather hastily, craving the hurried way Spencer fucks you. “It’s not the same without you here.”
“I know,” Spencer hums. “You look so good like that. I wish I could make you feel good right now.”
You moan, pushing your fingers into yourself deeper, barely hitting where Spencer reaches easily. The squelch from between your legs is obscene. “You do, baby. You’re making me feel so good, just thinking about you.” 
In practically a whisper, Spencer admits, “I want to fuck you so bad right now.”
You let out a weak cry, impossibly turned on by your boyfriend’s filthy admission because you didn’t even think he had it in him to say it so bluntly. You slide your fingers in and out hurriedly, your palm giving you the friction on your clit that you crave so desperately. “Spencer–”
Spencer lets out a strangled cry, muffled behind his hand, when he comes. It’s sudden, Spencer’s load painting the soft skin of his stomach, his cock twitching. You moan as you follow suit, wetness drenching your hand as you ride out your own orgasm, imagining his cock inside of you. 
“Oh, fuck.” Spencer gasps, head thrown back as you watch his chest rise and fall as he breathes heavily. His forehead and neck are covered in a light sheen of sweat, and his cock out against the rest of his rather soft, innocent looking outfit is making you giggle just a little.
“You look really hot right now,” you say instead, wishing you could be laying next to him while he recovers.
“I think I should be saying that about you,” Spencer laughs. “You’re gorgeous. You’re so stunning.”
“How long are you going to be away?” You pout. “I like it when I can actually kiss you after you compliment me.”
Spencer smiles sympathetically. “I’ll be back soon, my love.”
“I’ll take phone sex with my boyfriend as a consolation, then.” You wink, making Spencer laugh. 
“Remind me not to get too loud, though. I think Emily is in the room next to me and I really hope these walls are thick enough.” He says, sounding vaguely concerned.
You laugh, and stay on the line a little longer just to relish in a peaceful moment with Spencer.
The next day, when you’re out getting groceries to stock up Spencer’s fridge, you get a text from Spencer.
I don’t know how much Emily heard last night, but she’s been looking at me funny all morning. > lol oops? If we call again tonight, we might have to keep it down.  > if? not when? :) I love you so much. > i know and i love you too :) and you should probably apologise to emily about last night Well, if we’re calling again tonight then maybe I should just give her one big apology when all of this is over. > good idea. now go catch your killer so we can go back to having sex irl Okay!
Unfortunately, Spencer gets too busy to call you again that night, the team working overtime to catch their UnSub, whose kills were escalating exponentially. You don’t find yourself bothered by it, by Spencer disappearing for the night with nothing more than a message sent your way, instead relishing in the fact that it’ll feel even more rewarding when he comes home. 
You’ve never felt this way before, craving Spencer so desperately while he’s away at work. While you’ve only been together a couple of months, you respect that Spencer’s work takes up a lot of his time. It doesn’t mean you don’t miss him, though, as much as you enjoy your alone time.
All of the team’s hard work pays off, though, because they’re storming into the UnSub’s lair by Monday afternoon, and Spencer texts you when you’re just clocking out of the office.
Great news! We caught the guy. We’re packing up at the PD and coming home soon. > omg!!! that’s so great The team wants to go out for celebratory drinks.  > you should totally go ahead and celebrate with them spence! you guys worked your asses off on this case We did. But I’m telling you because I want you to join us. I want you to meet the team too.  > oh? i would love to but are you sure they want me there? Of course, sweet girl. Derek wants to know who has me smiling at my phone half the time, and Emily is asking who I’m calling in the middle of the night. > omg so she did hear you … I think so, love. > … i will apologise to her tonight then I’ll send you the address. Love you > love you too spence <3
There’s just enough time for you to get home and change into a nice outfit – a tight, red dress that hits your mid-thigh, your hair curled and your makeup touched-up before you head to the bar Spencer’s sent you the address to. While you know Spencer’s team is lovely, you do want to make a good first impression.
You see Spencer’s gangly form at the bar when you get there, the rest of his team facing away from you as they get their drinks. You see Spencer’s face brighten as he spots you, raising his hand and waving to you excitedly. The rest of his team notices, and turns to look at you too. You would be shy at all the attention, but Spencer’s unabashed adoration of you, especially in front of all his friends, is giving you more than enough confidence to walk up to the group.
“Hello,” you smile, and the warmth you feel from the team makes you feel welcome already. “It’s nice to meet you all.”
You shake hands with Hotch and Rossi as you introduce yourself. While you had heard of Hotch as a rather cold, serious Unit Chief, the way he warmly smiles at you makes you feel at ease. “So, you’re Spencer’s girlfriend. It’s great to finally meet you.”
“It’s great to meet you too, sir,” you answer rather instinctively, making both Rossi and Hotch laugh heartily. 
“Aaron might be Reid’s boss, but he certainly isn’t yours,” Rossi chuckles. 
Before you can feel embarrassed by it, you get pulled into a tight, warm hug by Penelope, and when she lets you go, JJ hands you a drink, and Derek and Emily are regarding you with knowing smirks. 
“Reid, you are one lucky man,” Derek says, after pulling you into a welcoming hug. “Don’t mess this up, lover boy.”
“I know,” Spencer says, his hand reaching for yours. You lace your fingers with Spencer’s, squeezing his hand comfortingly. “And I won’t mess this up.”
“Lover boy is right, considering what I overheard the other night,” Emily says, looking at you and Spencer pointedly. JJ also has a knowing smile on her face, and you feel your cheeks get hot.
“I’m really sorry about that, Emily,” you smile sheepishly. “I hope Spencer’s apologised for it too.”
“Again, I’m sorry you had to hear that,” Spencer says, purposefully avoiding eye contact with Emily. “I would say ‘We won’t do it again’, but…”
You shriek amidst the laughter of Spencer’s coworkers, Spencer laughing along as he holds onto your waist. You feel adored, so readily welcomed by Spencer’s friends, and you feel like you belong, by Spencer’s side.
After you chat with the rest of the team for a little more, they eventually disperse to do their own things, leaving you and Spencer alone. Spencer looks at you with such adoration in his eyes and you feel like you’re going to melt. “Hi,” he says warmly.
“Hi, Spence,” you say. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too,” Spencer smiles. “But I’m here now.”
“You are,” you breathe, giddy with excitement, and lean in to kiss him. It’s a quick peck, but Spencer pulls you back in like you’re the air he needs to breathe. He kisses you deep, eager, pouring every drop of himself into you. His hands cup your face sweetly, kissing you until you feel breathless. 
“Oh my God, Spencer,” you giggle when he finally pulls back, eyes wild as he regards you. “You really missed me, huh?”
“You have no idea,” Spencer laughs. 
“Do we need to pretend to keep our hands off each other or do you just want to go and make out in the bathroom?” You say simply. You don’t expect Spencer to be down, considering how quickly he’d rattle off the statistics about the germs in a public bathroom, but Spencer smiles at you and pulls you toward the single stall.
You’re thankful it’s a relatively big, clean-looking single stall bathroom, Spencer locking the door behind you as you lean back against the sink. Spencer’s taller figure crowds you in with ease, and you feel swallowed up by him as he kisses you again. He’s desperate, eager as his tongue slips into your mouth, his little noises so deliciously sinful as you kiss him back.
“Spence–” you gasp, in between kissing Spencer back. “Oh, baby–”
“What we did over the phone wasn’t enough,” he murmurs, eyes unblinking as he gazes at you. “I need you right now.”
Sure enough, Spencer’s hard in his pants. He pushes his hips forward, pressing his erection against your thigh. You whimper, drawing your lower lip between your teeth. “Please, Spence. You can take me right here, right now.”
You feel just as desperate as Spencer seems, his hands eager as they roam up your body. He’s eager to touch and squeeze and grope whatever he can get his hands on, and you relish in the way his large, sturdy hands grab your thighs, your waist, your breasts.
“You look so good tonight, my love,” Spencer grunts as he presses his face to your neck, his lips kissing up the column of your neck hurriedly. “So gorgeous. Letting me show you off to all my friends too– Thank you, you’re so perfect–”
“Spencer,” you gasp, hand sliding down to rub at his hard-on. You’re so turned on by how aroused Spencer is already, from just kissing you, from just touching you. “Fuck me, please?”
Spencer exhales shakily, lifting you up slightly so you can sit back on the countertop, your legs spread to accommodate Spencer between them. You’re soaked through your underwear, and you watch Spencer marvel at the sight. His hands are shaking slightly as he undoes his belt, pushing his pants down just enough to get his cock out. He’s hard and heavy and leaking, and you find yourself drooling as he strokes himself momentarily.
Spencer’s biting his lower lip in utter concentration, pushing your dress up and out of the way. You expect his hands to slide your panties off, but instead his fingers push the fabric aside, revealing your slick, wet entrance that he presses the head of his cock to. “Oh–”
“Like this,” Spencer says, breathless, his sentence not even fully coherent but you understand, especially when Spencer pushes the tip of his cock into you. You muffle a sob into your hand, feeling so on edge as you accommodate Spencer’s length. 
The burn is perfect, the slow drag of his cock inside of you teetering between pain and pleasure. It’s a primal urge the both of you desperately need to fulfil, and the way he presses into you satiates you so perfectly. Your arms slung around Spencer’s neck, you cry out weakly as he rocks his hips into you, already brutal and hurried with the pace. 
You’ve never felt this undone, so desperate that you’d let yourself get fucked in a bathroom stall. You barely have any alcohol in your system, for you to feel reckless enough to do something like this. Hell, Spencer hadn’t even taken your panties off before he’d started fucking you. The fact that prim and proper Spencer of all people is making you like this makes your head spin. 
“Oh, fuck, baby,” you whimper into his shoulder. “So good, Spence, oh–”
“You feel so good,” Spencer groans, hips stuttering as he tells you just that. “You’re so perfect. I love you.”
“I love you so much,” you hiccup, feeling Spencer drill into you, the muffled slap of his thrusts hitting the back of your thighs. You’re so overwhelmed, pleasure zipping through you from the top of your head to the tips of your toes, as Spencer fucks you like you’re the only person in the world that matters right now. 
“I’m close,” Spencer gasps, pace growing uneven, hurried, as he chases his pleasure while trying so hard to make you feel good too. “Please, I–”
You cry out as your orgasm hits you, too sudden, too quick. You clench around Spencer as your body shakes, Spencer fucking you through it with desperation. You don’t expect to come so quickly, but you suppose missing Spencer has an effect on you. 
You squelch obscenely with your release as Spencer continues to fuck you, needy and hurried, moaning in your ear as he stumbles into his orgasm too, wracking through his body like he has no control over it. You feel his load spill inside of you, hot and messy, his hands trembling as his thrusts slow.
“Oh, fuck,” you say, laughing slightly. “Holy shit, Spencer. We just had sex in a public bathroom, this is crazy.”
“We just had sex in a public bathroom,” Spencer echoes, sounding mildly panicked. “Oh, my God.”
“It was very fucking hot.” You assure him, holding his face in your hands to look him in the eyes, stopping him from overthinking. “But we should probably go home, because I’m a fucking mess between my legs right now.”
“I might need to take a shower,” Spencer says, his voice wavering slightly. “The sink is technically the most germ-ridden surface in a public bathroom, the damp environment makes it a–”
“Spencer, I love you so much, but for your sake and mine, let’s not talk about germs right now.” You shudder at the thought. “I think I need to take a shower after that too.”
“Let me clean you up, and we can go home.” Spencer, despite his germ anxieties, is rather sweet in cleaning you up. Your panties are ruined with fluids, and you’re starting to feel Spencer’s load trickling out of you when you stand back up, but you relish in the fact that you’re going to be back at his apartment soon enough. 
(The fact that Spencer hadn’t corrected you when you called his place home, makes your heart sing.)
You clean up your makeup and make your hair look as presentable as it can be, especially after your boyfriend has literally fucked you in a public bathroom, and when you both look presentable enough, you try to slip out of the bathroom casually.
Unfortunately, Derek and Emily are right there, catching you in the act of leaving, obviously noting the way you and Spencer look absolutely dishevelled. 
Derek raises his eyebrows, grinning. “Damn, lover boy.”
“Shut up,” Spencer retaliates weakly, his voice slightly shaky. 
“We’re heading home first,” you say with all the confidence you can muster, trying very hard not to feel extremely embarrassed in front of Spencer’s very smug friends. You’re still holding Spencer’s hand, and you feel a little less afraid. “It was fun getting to meet you guys.”
Emily shakes her head playfully, smiling. “We’d love to hang out more with you another time. Maybe when Reid isn’t so desperate to get alone with you?”
Spencer makes a displeased noise, but you smile and nod at her. “Definitely.”
Derek and Emily let you slip out of the bar without saying much else, and you hope that the rest of Spencer’s team doesn’t hear about it. 
As you and Spencer step out of the bar and into the cool, evening air, you kiss his cheek once more. “I love you. Now, let’s get home so we can shower. And then we can have sex again in the comfort of your bed?”
Spencer grins, any earlier embarrassment seeming to melt away. “That sounds perfect. God, I love you.”
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roturo · 11 months ago
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↷ ⋯ ♡ᵎ I FOUND MY BEST FRIEND LITTLE SISTER FINISHING IN HIS BATHROOM WHILE MOANING MY NAME. So... I fucked her.
tags: smut, unprotected sex, dumbification, breeding, overstimulation, a lot of cum, age-gap, gojo is SO obsessed with you, tummy bulge, sadism, breeding, dacryphilia, cunnilingus, reader gets caught masturbating, objectification if you squint, possesive gojo...
A/N: wasn't my last writing of the year lol, wrote this while watching sinjin drowing so npr, happy holidays!!
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You’ve known Gojo Satoru almost for your entire life. It was one day your brother Suguru introduced the both of you just so he could enter the house and have dinner to continue playing with Satoru.
Ever since Gojo has been a daily presence in your house. He was known as “Y/N’s big brother hot best friend” well, mostly to the ones who liked Gojo, because that didn’t stop the other girls from crushing into your brother. 
You told your friends you didn’t like Gojo in that way, since he was off limits for you- Not only because he was your brother's best friend but because it also ruined your hopes thanks to the age difference you had between. 
Being a freshman in college wasn’t easy. Not only you had the weird seniors going for the new girls, but being known as the Geto’s Suguru’s hot little sister didn’t feel like a compliment either. At least Gojo treated you as your own person, not like Geto’s other friends.
Geto invited you over at his dorm, having some of his close friends present, which included Gojo. It turned into an usual occurrence ever since you entered college, your brother making it easier for you to adapt into this new environment. 
All of you decided to take it easy tonight and just watch a movie. Nothing wrong with it, right? Well, there's nothing wrong. While watching, Gojo would try to make small talk with you, most likely because he’s just clingy and Geto is hanging with his girlfriend on the other sofa. Nothing wrong with what’s happening. During scary moments he would lean and hug you. Keeping his right hand on your left thigh, playing with the strings of your tiny small pajama shorts. 
That comment is his, obviously. Keeping the blanket covering both of your bodies and his totally not wrong act. And you’re pretty sure if he just moved his hand a little higher he would feel your wetness coating your shorts.
Gojo was trying to gain your attention. It’s pretty obvious he’s been crushing you for years now, and he’s pretty sure Suguru has commented about it. Taking it as a go to continue flirting with you and adorning your pretty face with reddish colors.
But ever since he entered college, he kinda forgot about his crush and got his head (and dick) into other girls. The first time he saw you again, he couldn’t believe it. You looked so beautiful and.. different in a good way. It’s like his caged feelings escaped and flew all across the room.
And he’s sure that happened to you too, because your pretty face didn’t hide those loving reddish colors he adored.
Coming back to the present, it was kinda weird everytime he hugged you or leaned into you. You seemed uncomfortable… Your thighs caging his hand, making his blood run straight into his cock. But he didn’t think anything about it, and assumed it was normal. 
While he was leaning into you, it became difficult and you decided to go to the bathroom to at least fix the problem going on between your legs and left. After a while, Gojo noticed that you were taking a long time, and he really needed to use the bathroom too to also fix his problem between his legs. He got up, commenting about going to the bathroom too. His friends clearly are not caring about it– too busy in their make out session.
He got out and decided to wait for you to get out of the bathroom. He stood in front of the bathroom door for a while until he realized the door was unlocked so he assumed that you already finished and just went somewhere else. 
He opened the door and then, he saw you.
Never in his entire life did he expect to see such a pretty sight. Your pretty fucking face could make him cum alone. Your mouth making an ‘o’ form with your eyebrows scrunched up, just whimpering his name. Legs opened up trying to find balance sitting down in the toilet.
And you might have an exhibitionism kink or maybe you were just at your limit. Because once you realized Gojo was standing there watching you, it brought you to climax. Taking you an embarrassing amount of time to recover from it.
He couldn’t believe his eyes and shut the door in front of you face and went back to the living room with a raging erection, and never mentioned the incident with you from the remaining time.
As soon as he left, you went up running towards him, begging to not tell anyone about it. And Gojo Satoru, being the asshole he is, saw this as an opportunity.
“Okay.”
“Okay?! Oh my god Gojo, thank you so much- I swear I can explain it was-”
“But,”
Fuck. There has to be a ‘but’
“You have to go out with me and do it on my face.”
Silence…
“I- I’ve never done it before…”
Oh fuck. You’re going to be the cause of the death of Gojo Satoru.
He wasted no time taking you to his dorm, stealing small pecks from you which helped you with the anxiety in your tummy turn into desire for him. Feeling confident enough, once the both of you entered his dorm he closed the door and you attacked his lips with no warning. Earning a groan from him, your hole clenching at the feeling of his clear erection making its presence between the both of you.
He picked you up, a moan leaving his lips once he realized the big difference of size between your bodies, thinking how you would be capable of taking his cock. He had to prepare you enough to fit him.
Your back arched from the bed as Satoru's tongue laps up the slick of your soaking hole, his lips around your clit, sucking like his life depended on it. It's been so long since he felt like this for somebody, the feeling that he just wants to bend you over anything and just... shove his cock in your tight little pussy.
It's like, you're created for the sole purpose of pleasuring him. You just have to be, that's what he thinks as he plays with your body. Fat tears fall out of your pretty doe eyes, your hands finding their way onto his scalp and tugging at his hair.
Why can't you just take it? Look at you now, whimpering and crying, but on the inside you know you love it, being a little whore for your brother’s best friend– you sob as he continues his assault on your poor pussy.
Why do you keep screaming at him to stop? You were just screaming his name some hours again. Is it the overstimulation? But you weren’t prepared enough for his cock!
Gojo knows you better than anyone, he knows you even better than your older brother. Why do you think he’s the one taking care of you this whole time in college? Who do you think has been scaring off the guys waiting in line to have a taste of this pussy? It’s so weird you don’t know about it because everyone thinks you’re off limits right now.  Is it because you’re really that naive? Maybe he loved that of you, how you’re so clueless of how crazy you make him. Being known as “Gojo’s Satoru’s hot next and official last real girl” instead of “Geto’s hot little sister”
 Like- That’s why he's giving your sweet little cunt a lot of attention right now.
“Ssatoru! Please, stop! baby… ‘s too much..”  All your whines fall into deaf ears as he continues without a care. Your pussy felt so stimulated as he sucked on your hole, his tongue licking and his throat groaning at the mere taste of your slick.You can barely lift your hands in exhaustion.
For hours, he didn't stop, continuously dragging orgasms out of you without fail.
“Aww, are you tired? But I finally have the girl of my dreams" You nodded, your tummy full of butterflies, making a mental note to talk about your feelings with Satoru tomorrow- your eyes droopy from all the cumming you've been doing for the past hours.
"But, princess, I'm not done yet~ I have to show you how much I desired you this whole time, how much I have waited for you to finally give and and realize." Gojo purred as unclasped the button of his pants, taking off his own clothing. “ But I guess you were just so dumb to get it all those years ago, at least you kept this cute cunt for me. We still have much time left. Fill you up and break you apart baby” You were faced by his raging cock, hard and full- he sits back down between your legs, lifting them up to his shoulders again, he then rests his hand against your clit. And after that, he slapped your pussy so hard that it made you jump and cry of his name. Never in your life did you expect your dream to become true and have your first time with him. Nor Gojo being a sadist and a have an obsession with your pretty little cunt compared to him
"I'm gonna pump your pussy with all the cum I have, girlie. You made a promise after all."
It's like Gojo doesn’t have a stamina limit in his body- able to go round after round in position after position - but at this point it’s been god knows how many times. He’s addicted to the way you feel around him, the sounds you make when he fucks into you a certain way, or just the look of your fucked-out, dazed face that has him needing more of you. 
“hah- made a big mess down there, huh?” Gojo sneers brashly, heavy hips rocking into you faster at just the lewd sight of his cum from previous rounds smothering your skin. the aching twitch in his cock won’t fade, pleasure burgeoning with every press of his cock into the hilt of your pussy. “I think there’s room for some more, yeah? just one more…”
Your little play doll for him to change, shape, and form. A clear bump showing and leaving your tummy, making Gojo’s eyes go crazier and more full of desire than before. He programs you to do things he wants, and you just nod your head at his words though you don't understand them, just giving him a smile on your lips- your delicate fingers already spreading your pussylips for him, ready to take his cock inside of you. Biting your lip, rolling your eyes as he plunges into you. 
You couldn’t count how many times Gojo’s said ‘just one more round’, but from the fatigue glimmering in his eyes and the raggedness lacing his breath - you can tell this is the last one. So naturally, he’ll make sure it’s the best one of the night. 
“g’na fill you up like you deserve, yeah? lemme fuck this pussy full,” Gojo grunts pantingly between a grin, fingers digging into your waist taut as the heavy smacks of his hips against yours get sloppy and quick. it’s with rasped groans and his hips fully bottomed out that he finally cums for the last time, ropes of white seeping out around his shaft and spilling onto the sheets. he can’t help but bargain and promise to clean the bed if you let him do it all over again tomorrow.
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ltleflrt · 8 months ago
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Figuring out I'm on the ace spectrum was so difficult because I have always been a horny bitch. I knew what sex was at a fairly young age, because I'd asked my mom and she's one of those good parents who'll answer questions like those, and as I grew older and would ask more complex questions, her answers would evolve along with my curiosity and understanding of the world. And I remember having fantasies as young as 9 or 10 years old, even if they were hella vague and nothing close to what sex actually is lol
So as I became a teenager, and all my friends' focus turned from playing with dolls to flirting with boys, I automatically thought I was attracted to boys. And I paid more attention to Cute Boys than I did to Cute Girls, because girls were just nice to look at while boys were People To Have Crushes On. Because of heteronormativity. Looking back on it now, I know there were girls I liked to stare at just as intently as boys, although less often because I wasn't trying to pay attention. And I certainly didn't fantasize about girls because I started reading romance novels in 5th grade, so I was fantasizing about male romantic partners because that was the fiction I was consuming. I didn't even realize fantasizing about girls was possible until I was 17, and I had a few "am I a lesbian" internal crises for years because of it.
So when I did start having sex, I had A LOT OF IT with SO MANY different guys, and eventually a couple of women once I started accepting that bisexuality was real. But it was never really fulfilling. Not like my fantasies were. Not like my books were. I was slutty because sex was fun, I was horny, there were plenty of options so I kept searching for that satisfaction I was craving.
Getting married was a relief (even though it turns out I'm aro-spec too lol) because I was tired of hunting, and even if sex with my husband was meh, at least I had someone around to scratch that itch if I had it, and he didn't mind if I occasionally took care of things on my own because I'd read an especially hot scene in a romance.
I learned about asexuality in my early 20s, but I brushed it off. Couldn't be me, I'm far too horny for that. But I think that comes from the fact that everything you hear about Aces is attached to sex-repulsion or sex-indifference. I wasn't either of those things. I was horny all the dang time. I was fantasizing about sex all the dang time. I figured actual sex was meh because my imagination was so vivid that real life could never match up. Which could be true to an extent, but I think not as much as popular opinion would have us believe. If fantasy was really that much better for everyone, then I think we'd have less incels and unplanned pregnancies than we do.
In my 30s I finally saw people talking about The Spectrum, and I started examining my past, and I figured out I wasn't really attracted to anyone I had sex with. I do occasionally find someone attractive; there are men and women and enbies who make my skin feel tight and give me a little wave of lightheadedness lol... but it's always always the fantasy that gets me really going. If given the opportunity I wouldn't have sex with any of those people. Thank you, but no thank you, I'd rather just imagine it than physically participate in the act with them.
(Ok I might go down on them, but that's less about wanting sex, and more about being able to add them to my Tally. Hell yeah I want to brag about making *insert hot person* have an orgasm. There's PRIDE in that kind of accomplishment lol)
I have a lot of respect for aces that are not horny. I understand it even if I don't share the sentiment. And I feel like most of them understand me even if they don't share the sentiment. There's a solidarity between us.
Until I go into a fandom tag for a character that the aces have glommed onto because they're canonically ace or headcanoned as ace. Good lord, the non-horny aces can turn into downright vicious bastards if a horny ace sexualizes their blorbo.
This post is for them.
Horny aces exist. Please look up "autochorissexual, lithosexual, and aegosexual."
Refer to those definitions in regards to romantic attraction as well as sexual attraction.
Some aces may not fall into one of those definitions, because asexuality is a spectrum, but they may still be horny.
Horny aces are not disrespecting you by enjoying being horny on main. We promise we'll wash the stickiness off our hands before we hold your hands in queer solidarity.
And most importantly: Your blorbo is fictional and does not need to be defended from icky sexuality. They exist in an infinite multiverse, so your blorbo and my blorbo are not the same, even if they appear to be on the surface.
AND:
This post is also for the people who are confused about themselves because they're horny but don't actually feel attraction. You're not crazy, you're not wishy washy, you're not "waiting for the right person to come along" (unless you are, in which case I hope you find them). You're just a thin strip of color on a massive rainbow that holds more unique shades than anyone can perceive at a glance.
You're valid. You're one of us too.
And don't be mean to the non-horny aces. Tag your smut so they can avoid it. (But actually so I can find it lol)
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nereidprinc3ss · 5 months ago
Text
weber's law
in which spencer reid comforts fem!reader when she's having a panic attack at the rossi mansion
fluff warnings/tags: panic attack lol, spencer is really cute and sweet my little perfect cutie pie angel baby, classic spencer info dumps bc they're pretty much his love language, established relationship, cheesy and sweet at the end a/n: this one is for my queens with panic disorders who are triggered by literally nothing and everything i see you have this ilysm
When Spencer had invited you to a small get-together at Rossi’s, you’d imagined a small get-together at Rossi’s. 
And maybe that makes you a complete idiot. 
Or maybe Spencer is just so used to FBI work functions that to him, this really is small.
But now you’re sitting on an expensive couch in a very nice house, and you’re surrounded by FBI agents who are all milling around and talking and laughing, and you’re worried maybe your outfit doesn’t look as nice on you as you’d thought it did, and you keep having very vivid visions of spilling your drink all over a furry throw rug that probably costs more than your rent does. 
Music that could reasonably be considered relaxing or at the very least not objectionable plays over the sound system throughout the whole house and thus is inescapable—not that you’d get up from the couch even if you could, because Spencer is sitting to your right and he has his hand on your thigh and it’s the only thing that has until this point been keeping you from a full blown panic attack.
Maybe that makes you a complete idiot, too.
Regardless, you try to focus on nothing but the weight of his hand as it travels slowly up and down from knee to hip over the jeans you’re not so sure about, and the feeling of your breath coming and going, as slow as you can possibly summon it without passing out. 
Spencer is laughing at something JJ is saying as she stands next to the couch with Will and you really like JJ but her voice seems so loud right now, and nothing is going particularly wrong but everything feels so, so wrong it’s scary. 
All the buzzing tension in your body telling you to run away because you’re unsafe and at the same time locking you into place builds until you have to express it somehow. So you revert to an old habit—bouncing your leg rapidly like a rabbit thumping its foot. It’s not entirely conscious, but it feels better than being completely still. That is, until Spencer’s hand strays inward and cups just above your inner knee, where he begins fanning his thumb back and forth over the fabric. 
“What’s this?” he murmurs, head angled toward you and voice low enough to not draw attention. You force yourself to plant your heel to the ground even though it worsens the feeling of gears crunching in your chest. 
“Nothing. Sorry.”
That gets his attention. 
Because of course it does. He’s always telling you to stop saying sorry so often. 
His tone solidifies, still quiet but committed to this conversation now and no longer the whispery apparition of a quick aside. 
“Why are you sorry?” 
“I don’t know, it wasn’t—it’s nothing.”
You barely avoid apologizing again. 
For a moment he doesn’t speak, just watches you—and you make the mistake of raising your gaze to meet his. He has that curious, analytical look about him, concern tightening his eyes and knitting his brow. He’s doing that annoying mind-reading thing again, and as soon as he actually sees your eyes, he’s figured you out. 
“Do you want to go outside for a minute? Get some air?”
After examining his face for any clues that he’d rather stay in here, (not that you’d really know what to look for), you nod hesitantly. Spencer mirrors your nod and stands, holding out his hand for you to take as you follow suit after setting your drink on a side table (without spilling.)
JJ is now wrapped up in conversation with another agent and the two of you manage to abscond without attracting unwanted attention, which makes you feel slightly better as Spencer leads you deftly through rooms with high-vaulted ceilings and big windows and heavy, expensive looking oak furniture. It seems like you’ve been wandering through a maze when you arrive to a quieter part of the house and he opens a french door for you—which leads out onto an empty patio. 
A cool breeze immediately sinks into your skin, and your nervous system is so hyper-alert that it gives you chills. Spencer notices the way you shiver and steps closer after closing the door behind him, his hand finding the small of your back immediately. 
“You okay?” he asks, intentionally avoiding impeding your view of the sweeping backyard and the trees beyond. Sometimes focusing on something stationary is less overwhelming, but they’re so tall they seem imposing. Threatening, even. 
But then again, everything feels threatening right now. 
“Yeah. I’m fine.”
Spencer seems unconvinced by your monotone—when you glance over at him he’s still watching you like you’re a puzzle to be solved. 
“Are you sure? You can tell me if you’re not.”
“Why are you so convinced something is wrong?” you laugh, but it comes out too manic. You cross your arms. He looks pointedly at the motion. 
“For starters, that. Often times crossing your arms is a subconscious way of comforting yourself when you feel defensive or threatened. And you could say it’s because you’re cold, but—” he pauses, reaching out to touch your cheek. “I can feel how hot your face is, and you shivered when we came outside even though it’s 71 degrees because your nervous system is overreacting to external stimuli. The leg-bouncing is also often indicative of an activated parasympathetic nervous system. Is me touching you okay?”
Again, you nod—unsure how to deflect when he calls you out so efficiently. 
Spencer’s hand slides down to just beneath your jaw, where he rests two fingers. Each second that passes has him looking progressively more worried. You wish you weren’t quite so catatonic—the fairy lights hanging from the pergola shine through his hair and make him glow so appealingly you want to kiss his cheek. 
“Your heart rate is really high, honey.”
That would be due to the sense of impending doom. Thanks for pointing it out.
But you’ve lost your words, and along with them has gone your sense of humor. All you can manage for a 30 second span is a meaningless shake of your head as you avert your eyes, staring at the sprawling carpet of blue-green grass soaked in night as each blade doubles with your tears. 
“I think I’m dying,” you finally croak.
“Technically, we all are. Very slowly.”
Ah. There’s that social tact he’s so well known for. 
“Spencer.”
“Right,” he kisses your cheek as you stare up at him, affronted, and pulls you into his chest. “Sorry. I was actually trying to be helpful. Changes in brain chemistry and hormonal activity associated with panic attacks change your perception of time and make things feel really fast which can contribute to feelings of anxiety. But in reality time is moving just the same as it always is. One second is always one second. Sometimes remembering that helps me to slow down. Not literally, of course. My gravitational pull isn’t great enough to have any discernible effect on the passage of time.”
You sniff, pressing your cheek to his tie. His words make your head spin, seeing as you hadn't been prepared for a lecture in psychophysics—but it spins in the opposite direction than it had been going previously. It's nice.
“Change your perception of time?”
“Weber’s law of perception. Stimulus sensitivity will increase proportionally with increased stimulus intensity. You’re only perceiving time to be going faster because your cortisol and adrenaline levels are making you hyper-vigilant and sensitive to all the markers of time passing.”
“Like what?”
Spencer hums, the bass of it a comforting resonance against your ear, and strokes your hair unhurriedly. 
“Like… your internal clock. Your body measures time with your heartbeat, so when your heart rate increases, time seems to go faster. Also environmental cues, which lead you to understand that the world is not stagnant and thus is not frozen in time. Like the sound of the wind chimes…” he pauses, long enough for you to realize that indeed, you can hear the gentle, sonorous ringing and tinkling of steel chimes bouncing against each other. “And the wind itself, which is coming all the way from the Gulf of Mexico. Some studies actually suggest that wind direction can affect your energy levels and mood.”
It’s a gentle breeze more than it is full-blown wind. It feels cool against your hot skin. 
Spencer’s hand on the back of your head, still rhythmically smoothing your hair, seems to slow down the passage of time as well. You focus on that, and the sound of the wind chimes and the breeze on your skin for a few minutes, until your breathing and your heart rate slow and soon you regain your footing in the temporal dimension, exactly sure of where you stand on Rossi’s patio and in your boyfriend’s arms. 
“You tricked me into doing a grounding exercise,” you mumble into Spencer’s jacket. 
“I did not trick you,” he defends, voice quiet to match yours. “I just wanted to make you feel better. Did it work?”
You pull away from him and he lets you, watching on as you sniffle and wipe your tears on your sleeves. 
“Yeah, it did. Thank you.”
For a moment, neither of you speak as you gather yourself. He leads you by the hand to a cushioned hanging bench at the end of the patio, taking a seat next to you and gently rocking the swing. 
“Do you know what triggered that?” Spencer asks, over the gentle creaking sound. You shrug, observing the dance of the fireflies in the grass. 
“Nothing. Sometimes I just feel like everything’s wrong and scary but I didn’t want to tell you and ruin your night.”
“Hey,” Spencer murmurs, pulling you into him with an arm around your shoulder. “You are not ruining my night. I don’t want you to worry about that.”
“But all your friends and coworkers are inside, and you’re out here with me.”
He angles his head down toward you and you look up to meet his eyes, even warmer than the sticky summer night. 
“I am. Do you know why?”
“Because I suck,” you sniffle, more hot tears rolling down your cheeks as you attempt to look away. But Spencer’s not having it. He encourages you to sit up again so you can look at him properly, before wiping tears away gently with his thumb. When he speaks, it’s in soft, soothing tones. 
“No. I’m out here because if all my friends were inside having fun, and you were outside having a panic attack, I would choose you every time.”
You manage a laugh through the crying. 
“I don’t know if that’s healthy.”
“Whether or not it’s healthy is an entirely different discussion,” Spencer smiles wryly, before it melts into something softer and more sincere. “All that matters is that it’s true.”
For a while after that, you simply lay your head on his shoulder. Spencer controls the speed of the swing with his much-longer legs, kissing your head and rubbing your arm as you admire the expanse of Rossi’s lush yard bathed in moonlight and the black silhouette of the forest beyond. 
Eventually, Spencer speaks again, likely to make sure you’re not spiraling alone in your head. 
“Can I tell you an extremely classified secret that I've been trying really hard to keep to myself for three days?” he asks, and the mischievous edge to his voice catches your attention. You hum in assent, already wondering what kind of information Spencer would have a hard time keeping to himself. It could be anything. 
“Anderson is sleeping with Childers from Operational Tech.”
“What?”
Despite not working for the FBI yourself, Spencer and Penelope have you so filled in on the drama that you know exactly why that’s shocking. 
You pick your head up to look at him like do not fuck with me right now. 
His eyes sparkle as he nods.
“Yep.”
“Didn’t you tell me Childers was dating that girl in sex crimes?”
Spencer raises his eyebrows. The corner of his mouth twitches. You gasp. 
“No! What? Does Anderson know?”
“I don’t know. I certainly didn’t want to be the one to tell him.”
“Wait—Anderson told you this?”
“Yeah!” He laughs incredulously at your complete disbelief. “People tell me things! I’m an excellent confidant!”
“If you’re relaying all of this information to me then you’re a terrible confidant,” you chuckle, still watery—but feeling light years better. 
Spencer brushes your hair away from your face fondly, leaning a fraction of an inch closer. 
“You don’t count. Telling you secrets is basically the same as keeping them to myself.”
“Basically,” you tease, angling your head up by a few degrees in invitation. Spencer says nothing, does nothing for a long moment—just studies you with soft eyes, continues stroking your cheek. When he takes too long to kiss you, you get impatient. “I’m still kinda anxious, you know.”
He smiles knowingly.  
“Yeah?”
“Mhm,” you nod, looking pointedly at his lips. “You should kiss me better.”
“I think that would take more than just one kiss,” he murmurs through a smile, leaning ever closer until your noses are bumping. “I think I would have to devote several hours to that. Maybe even a whole day.”
“How does tomorrow look for you?” 
He’s laughing as he finally presses his lips to yours. The kiss is sweet and lingering. 
“For you? It’s wide open.”
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parfaitblogs · 5 months ago
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you're losing me ❀ s. reid x reader
in which he's an entirely different person after prison, and your relationship is crumbling. 
pairing: spencer reid x reader genre: angst tags: post prison reid. no happy ending. argument/fight. strong language. word count: 2.0k a/n: big fan of soul crushing angst. clearly. i dreamt this one up in an everything shower. likely place for me to plan fics? whole lot of nothing happening i love yapping about sadness!! my least favourite spencer trait is that he doesn't think he deserves good things so he pushes them away so obviously i have to write novellas on him doing just that? this used to be based on tolerate it but i listened to ylm the entire time so erm. things change! lol enjoy xoxo
Perhaps you were stupid. 
Very, very stupid. And ridiculous. And every other synonym for those two words that your brain could not possibly imagine up right now. You were all of them. But also none of them. Because you also felt like there was not a single word that could describe you anymore; if there was, maybe you'd consider yourself a person. But clearly you weren't a person. Not anymore, at least. Not to him. 
An awfully painful year it had been. And maybe that's what stripped you of your right to be a person. Maybe it was the overtime. Maybe it was the lack of sleep. Maybe it was everything all at once. Maybe it was nothing at all. 
Three years of dating one man meant you learned quite a bit about who he is as a person to you. Eight years of knowing him meant you knew very well what sort of person he is in general. 
And this wasn't him. 
He was sitting on your couch. A piece of furniture that had, in just one year, erased the memory of you from it, there no longer being an indent on the right side where you always sat. A book was sat in his lap, but he wasn't properly reading it. You could tell from how slowly he turned the pages. From how he stopped every few minutes to rub his eyes, his eyebrows creasing and a quiet, irritated huff leaving his lips. 
It was a habit he had developed. 
This was how it was every night. Three o'clock came, and your body would wake you up from an otherwise restless sleep, and you would drag your feet out to where the man who should be occupying the other side of your bed, actually is. And he wouldn't look up, but you both acknowledged each other's presence, silently. 
And you would watch him for an hour. Until your eyes began to droop, and your feet started to ache, and your heart couldn't handle any more shattering for the night. And then you would drag yourself back to the bedroom, and you would climb into a now cold bed, and you would fall back asleep for another two hours. 
Like clockwork.
You were good with him. So patient. You would make him mugs of morning coffee that he wouldn't drink, and you would wash clothes he wouldn't say 'thank you' for. You wondered if he was actually grateful or not. 
You were too scared to ask. 
"Hey," you said, quietly, when he had come home from work, shrugging his bag off his shoulders, and slipping shoes off his feet. 
"Hi," he answered. As if on instinct, he moved to where you were seated at the barstool to kiss you in greeting, before brushing past and heading into the kitchen. 
You watched him for a few moments as he found a piece of bread to eat, nothing on it. Just... dry. Before your eyes returned to the laptop screen you had open in front of you, fingers tapping away at your keyboard. 
"There's been another terror threat," you said to him, tilting your head to the side. "But they let me work from home."
"Why'd they do that?" he asked, but he could not sound less interested. 
You lifted your head, because you thought he knew. "Because of you, Spence."
"Oh, okay," he answered, and you watched as he threw out half of the bread he did not eat, before he disappeared down the hallway. 
He didn't even care. 
You stared at the empty space down the hall, where he had once been, heart lodged in your throat in an uncomfortable lump you couldn't swallow. This was why you felt stupid. 
Maybe you were sick of feeling stupid. You must be, because subconsciously, your feet had already planted themselves firmly on the floor, and your legs were already taking you down the hall in the exact direction he had just disappeared to. 
He was taking his button up off when you appeared in the doorway to your bedroom, replacing it with a t-shirt. You had never seen him wear so many t-shirts until now. 
You cleared your throat, alerting him of your presence, and he turned, his eyebrows furrowing when he saw you. 
"You know you can talk to me, right?" you said, voice wavering with cautiousness. 
His lips parted, then they closed, and all he managed was a short nod, before he turned back around to find pyjama pants in his drawers. 
"Spencer, I'm serious," you pressed, taking a step into the room. "You need to talk to someone about this."
"I have those counseling sessions at work," he answered, turning back around to face you only once he was wearing pants. 
Your lips pursed. "You hate those."
"Yes, but I'm talking to someone."
"Not someone you trust!"
"And if I talk to you, it would be so different compared to a counsellor, right?"
You froze. He froze. Maybe he realised the implication of his words, you certainly did. That such a simple spoken sentence had your heart stuttering in your chest. 
You shakily exhaled. "I'd hope it would be different," you decided to say. "But I wouldn't be surprised if it isn't anymore."
He stood straighter at your comment. Perhaps not the best thing to say. Certainly not the most mature. 
"What does that mean?"
Right. The reason you decided to follow him in the first place. "I just—I don't feel like you care anymore. And I have tried to be patient, Spencer. I really have. But you shut me out, and we don't even talk anymore. I make you coffee, I do your laundry, I offer to cook, I clean up the house, I do everything I possibly can so you can focus on healing, and I can't even get a proper sentence out of you unless we're arguing."
He inhaled sharply, staring at you. "I don't know if you forgot, but I was locked in a prison for three and a half months."
Your shoulders deflated, your eyebrows creasing and lips pulling down into a frown. "Seriously? I express that I am feeling neglected, and your only response is that you've been in prison—"
"—Well, it kind of changed who I am!"
You fell silent for a few moments, trying to collect your thoughts before you threw them all in his face and actually ruined things between you two. 
"I just feel like you don't care anymore," you repeated, voice awfully soft compared to how hard your body was shaking in anxiety. 
He ran a hand through his hair, and he opened his mouth to speak with that same frustrated frown, so you cut him off. 
"And yes, I know you're dealing with everything that happened to you in prison. I only know what they told us, so I can't even imagine how much you're withholding. Because I know that's what you do. But that doesn't give you an excuse to treat me like I'm not important in your life anymore. I mean, If I'm not, then tell me. If you really don't care, or you've decided that you can't be in a relationship and process everything at the same time, then I'd like to know."
The silence is uncomfortable. And thick. And you're staring at him with eyes that burned with tears you weren't ready to shed yet. He's coming up with a response, so slowly you think maybe prison actually did break his brain. 
"I do care," he finally said, and you wondered if it took him three minutes to come up with that because he was controlling a lie. You pushed that thought out of your head. "But I also don't want you to wait for me to be better, if it's making you feel this way."
Oh.
"Okay," you manage to say, voice not above a whisper as you stared at him. 
"Okay," he echoed, and the tears you were trying so hard to keep in brimmed your waterline, blurring your vision. If he hadn't become one big blob in your vision because of them, you might've seen his eyes soften and his shoulders deflate. 
Maybe he was waiting for you to confront him about it all. So he could end things. Maybe he's been thinking about this for too long, and this was just the final push he needed. You'd like to hope it was a spur of the moment decision, and he wasn't banking on this relationship ending. 
"I'll stay at a friend's," you then murmured, wiping the tears from your eyes, sniffling pathetically. 
"No, this is—"
"—You deserve familiar walls," you cut him off. "I'm sure anything else would freak you out."
He fell silent, because you were right. But he didn't want to kick you out of your own home. He didn't want to kick you out of his life, a sickening revelation he was having all too late.
Maybe that was why, when you turned around to leave, he called your name. Pleadingly. So, you turned back, and he stared at you, and silence fell over you two again. 
"What?" you breathed out after a few too many minutes of quiet. 
"I don't know how to talk to you. Or anyone. Not—not just you."
"About what happened?"
"In general."
You stilled, confusion sweeping across your features, for the thousandth time tonight alone. "You don't have to talk to me, if you can't. Regularly, I mean. That's not... that's not what I'm asking of you. I just need you to communicate with me. I feel like you don't even have feelings for me anymore. That's where most of my issues lie."
"I do have feelings for you."
"It doesn't feel that way."
More silence. More thick, deafening silence that felt like you had submerged your head underwater. And you really just wanted to come to a final conclusion. If this was the end.
"Then is it just that you don't want to be with me anymore? If it is, please tell me," you said, voice pathetically desperate.
He stared at you some more. Silence accompanying him, like some (annoyingly) comforting best friend amidst this conversation. And you slowly nodded your head as what he wanted became clear to you, your heart stuttering uncomfortably in your chest. Your stomach flipping. 
"Indecision doesn't look good on you," you finally cut through the blanket of quiet. "I need a verbal answer, Spencer."
"I do want to be with you—"
"—Then fight, dammit!" you finally snapped, the tears you had managed to control coming back to you, a sob lodging in your throat. "I am sick of you saying you do feel this, and you don't feel that. Make a fucking decision. Please. I cannot keep up a fight for the both of us anymore. You're losing me here, Spencer."
"I'm scared!" he shouted, and you took a step back, his voice vibrating throughout the room. He waged an internal battle for a few moments at your recoil. "That. That right there is what I'm scared of. I am so scared of scaring you."
"You scare me more when you shut down. I will take your anger over your silence."
"I won't," he snapped, watching you flinch. Again. You wanted to stop flinching. 
"It proves to me that you're actually feeling things. Spencer, I feel like I've been living with a ghost."
"I can't control my anger anymore," he added your name with a voice crack, mirroring your heart.
You blink some more tears down your cheeks. "You don't have to. You are allowed to be angry."
"Not around you," he shook his head, his hands brushing curls out of his face. "What if I—I hurt you."
"What if you don't?"
It seemed he hadn't considered that possibility, because he fell silent, and averted his gaze to the ground. He shook his head after a beat. "I can't take that risk."
You stared at him for a moment longer, weighing up your options, before you sighed. "Fine. Don't." He said your name again. "No. If you're not willing to fight, then... then fine. Don't fight. But neither will I."
He didn't say anything as you took a step back from the room. And even as you stilled for a few seconds longer, achingly but silently begging him to ask you to stay, he didn't utter a word. Which was, really, all you needed in confirmation. 
And so you left.
your reblogs and replies are always appreciated dearly ♡
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leafostuff · 4 months ago
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Messes in Distress [Ft. Weeekly Jihan and Zoa]
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Tags: BFH, 'Besties'!Zoa&Jihan, No plot all horny, Threesome, Double thigh riding, Double boobjob, Blowjob, Dirty talk, Fingering, Surprise Creampie, Anal, Pussy licking/eating, Mutual orgasm. no beta we die like man
Author's Note: as my august release i have to say: this is the filthiest fic I have ever written, throughout the entire writing process (which only took me two days) I have constantly felt both horny for those two gorgeous girls, but also inspired to keep writing and not stopping at anything.
as its also quite apperant, this is my first ever threesome smut, which I had tons of fun to write, so I do hope you will enjoy reading this fic that I worked very hard on.
PS: yes this was the post that I quickly deleted and responded with "YALL SAW NOTHING", my hand slipped on the post note lol
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This party never looked as colourful and vibrant as it is right now.
Or maybe its just the rave lights Jeonghoon, your best friend installed for his house party. After all of the finals you had to suffer this semester, a proper party is really what you needed, especially in such a big house like his which has more than enough space to party just in the backyard.
But back to what you were saying, there is so much for you to see from you view at the barstool chair. From the football players swimming inside, the cheerleaders eyeing them from the other edge of the pool, probably gossiping about the latest drama or whatnot, some frat boys drinking their 7th shot of the night while dancing to the DJ's (yeah your friend also hired a DJ for the party) music like there is no tommorow, and while some may look at this and call it anarchy, you find it quite enjoyable looking at it.
Then you see them
Two girls, one blondie, the other black haired, neither you have seen before (maybe you seen the blonde one in your 2 am walks back to your dorm, fetching groceries? Eh you don't really know), both of them wearing white tops that expose their bellies and denim blue jeans, both tailored to show their curves from head to toe.
They both look happy, eyes closed while both their bodies sensually move to the rhythm of the music. It's hard not to shift your focus to them, the way their bodies stand closer than usual while they look into each other ,how they lean their faces closer, engaging in a short kiss, or how-
Realize that the black haired girl caught your eyes, the blonde girl joins her, both smiling while their eyes wander downward.
you are a bit puzzled until you look down and realize; your pants now form a visible tent. You try to look away but its too late.
the two girls now exchange a look between each other before leaving the dance floor and heading toward you, their smiles are those of good girls, however you could feel their intentions are anything but.
Eventually they both stand in front of you, meanwhile
"You are Jeonghoon's friend, right?" The blonde asks, her voice softer than you thought.
"Uhhh...yeah? Why?"
"Great" the black haired girl joins the conversation. "We need a favor" she adds, her smile is even brighter than before.
"Sure" you answer, a bit confused "What favor you two need?"
They both grin widely before the blonde speaks again. "A BIG favour..." You could feel her fingers travel upward across your left thigh.
Meanwhile her friend leans her face to your right ear while her fingers mimic her friend's movement but on your right thigh and then her hand finds itself on your currently hard clothed member.
"A favour...only YOU can help us with..." She whispers in your ear.
Take a look at the two girls again, they are even prettier from close as each feature that you saw back then is now presented to you at high definition. From their silky and smooth hair, eyes that look like trouble but you are still in place as if you are frozen and their chests that look a size bigger than what you thought they were.
Their smiles which you could swear you could see them licking their lips.
Their soft, luscious looking red coloured lips that are oh so inviting...
You are not sure if the alcohol is talking right now but honestly, you don't care anymore. "Sure, I don't mind helping you two with your...favor".
The girls' smiles grow wider as you stand up from the barstool, take each one's hand and lead them inside the house and upstairs, thank god everyone else is outside.
"i never really got you two’s name" you said, navigating through the halls of the 2nd floor until eventually you find the door to Jeonghoon's room, but just as your hand gets close to the knob the two girls pin you to the wall, the black haired girl attached her mouth to your neck, alternating between licks, kisses and bites causing you to moan lightly.
Meanwhile the blonde puts her lips on you, engaging in a steamy makeout session while her tongue grazed against your teeth, as if asking for access to your mouth which you humbly accept. It's hypnotic how her sweet lips feel on yours, how her tongue explores inside your mouth, how as soon as she finds your own she initiates a sensual dance of tongues causing both of you to quietly moan.
You both eventually part lips, gasping for air, take a look at one you just kissed, her blonde hair now looks messier than it was when you first met her.
"heh...that was good" she speaks between pants, "anyways, i am Jihyo, and the one who is opening your jeans down there is Hyewon" look down, she already finished popping the last button, leaving you only in briefs.
"Well what are we waiting for, lets get inside" you say, the two girls giggle cutely while you open the room.
in the middle of the room is a king sized bed, big enough to have the three of you on it with pillows on the gar edge of the bed. The two girls lightly push you into the bed before joining you as each one straddles herself on each thigh of yours while their hands work together to take your shirt off your body, throwing it somewhere.
Now the three of you are in a loop.
Starting with Hyewon capturing your lips with hers while her hands rest on the left side on your chest l, admiring both your chest and abs. At the same time Jihyo latches her lips on the right side of your neck, delivering kisses from your shoulder all the way to your earlobe, there eliciting an audible moan directly to your ear before going back to her masterful attack of your neck, meanwhile her left hand wraps around your cock, rubbing it up and down in an attempt to get you harder as fast as possible.
Both of them also start to move their bodies back and forth on each of your thigh, letting you feel their friction getting you closer and closer to your first orgasm.
Suddenly, a switch; now Hyewon does Jihyo's job and vice versa, during those loops, your hands go each one to another girl, appreciating their bodies from their soft bellies all the way to their slander backs, then groping one breast of each girl causing both to gasp in surprise.
Eventually after enough back and forth of them pleasuring you, it gets harder for them to continue rubbing your cock as now they leave your lap, with both of their hands on the hem of your boxers. With perfect timing they pull it down, letting your cock pop out of your cock prison, leaving you the first one being fully naked.
"Wow...unnie, its so big" Hyewon says, looking at your member that is covered with some of your precum with excitement,
"Yes baby...he is so big, and all of it...for us" Jihyo responds, leaning into her friend's lips and pecks her lips lightly.
"I do think its a bit unfair i am the only one naked here" you mention the inequality.
"you are right Oppa" Hyewon replies, "i saw you staring at our tits, when we danced outside" she adds, leaving jihyo with a pretend surprise face.
"Is that so baby..." she questions her best friend before turning her eyes to you "Would you like to fuck them first?" the question might as well be rethoric as without any doubt you say.
"I would gladly want that"
"Then let us get started" Jihyo exclaims, letting you inch your body toward the edge of the bed. Meanwhile she goes behind Hyewon, hands grabbing the hem of her best friend's top, slowly pulling in an attempt to tease you slowly about each part of Hyewon's ample breasts, covered in a lacy purple bra until finally the top is completely off causing her tits to slightly bounce at the recoil, the piece of clothing is thrown at one of the pillows.
Now it's Jihyo's turn to discard her top, this time without any teasing, knowing you can't wait anymore for the show to begin as now she joined her friend being topless, only with a black bra as the wall between your eyes and her nipples.
back at Hyewon, she is now popping each button of her jeans while looking straight at your eyes, biting her lip in arousal and winking to you. Look down and see that her matching purple panties have a wet spot in the middle, making it clear to you that she is excited, and that she is waiting.
And she is not the only one as Jihyo also started quickly working on her own jeans, exposing her black panties and leaving the two girls only with their underwear, both their eyes and panties glistening in what can only be described as excitement.
It's sinful how they are both looking at your cock lustfully like it's their favorite meal waiting to be devoured, how they both kneel down to each side of your thigh while their face get closer to their prized possession.
How they both look at you with innocent eyes one last time before defying it forever.
The scene beneath you is filthy; two girls, both equally as gorgeous and sexy, engaging in a full on makeout session, loudly exchanging saliva with the tip of your cock in between receiving the leftovers. Both of their busts envelop the base, moving up and down, left and right in the rhythm of the kiss, even your balls are not left unsatisfied as both their underboobs take care of that part.
"Fuck...girls..." you mutter, only a minute passed and you are already in a haze, looking at the white ceiling, gripping the sheets of the bed to try and gain some semblance of control. You can't help yourself as you release an audible moan, making sure they know how good they make you feel.
"Unnie...I'm getting wet..." The black haired girl whined, pulling away from Jihyo's lips with an audible 'pop', panting to catch her breath before leaning back into the kiss
"me too baby," she breathily mumbles between kisses. "just a couple more seconds, i can feel him getting close ...".
eventually the first round of the white liquid came out, glazing both of their lips and tongues however they dont stop, even when some of your cum falls inside their mouth they continue, mixing both of their saliva with your cum, making both of their face messier by the second.
More cum erupts from your cock, painting the two girl's faces, some even get on their bras as you can feel yourself relieved with each string you shoot, soon enough the two girls release from their makeout session and rise up to sit on the edge of the bed, finally letting your cock rest, but not for long.
"Oh…you are still hard Oppa..." Hyewon exclaimed, cleaning some of your cum on her face before slightly pushing you closer to the middle of the bed, her previously innocent looking smile now has changed into a slutty grin.
“Let me help you” 
You don't even need words to show you agree as now hyewon hands go behind her back, letting an audible click be heard as her bra falls onto the bed, giving you a front view of her now hardened nipples.
Jihyo, seeing what her bestie is planning, quickly unclasped her bra as well and throwing it somewhere. Then they both, at the same time take their hands to their panties, quickly lowering them down their thighs, to their legs and then out of their bodies, finally joining you in being fully naked
Just the sight of the two girls' boobs being shown to you in their full glory and the way both of their neatly shaven pussies are leaking is enough to get your throat dry, unable to mutter a single word and only stare at them in awe.
Then, their second round of pleasure begins
Hyewon now leans down toward your shaft, letting her slender finger pump you one last time before her luscious lips envelope around the tip of your cock.
Her first slurp is enough to get you to moan loudly and move your head back in pleasure, then she starts moving her lips up and down at a steady pace, making sure every movement is audible with slurps, licks and everything in between. It's even worse when you see how her deer-like eyes stare directly into yours.
You are surprised to see how big her mouth is, as even though a lot of your cock is inside her mouth, she is still able to take more. Eventually your tip reaches the back of her throat, now deepthroating you 
“She is taking you sooo well, isn't she?” You didn't notice when Jihyo snaked behind you, her tits on your back while her hands glide around your pecs. her cloudy lips delivering sweet pecks to your neck and ear as only after processing all of the senses that she delivers you manage to get a small nod and mumble a small “ngh”
She cutely laughs at your attempt at her response. “I bet her lips feel so sweet on your big, thick cock” she whispers directly into your left ear, not expecting a seemingly sweet, adorable girl like her to speak such filth but for some reason, it excites you.
“I can't wait for you to fill both of our good girls holes with your thick, warm and sticky cum, letting you fuck us like your little slu-OH FUCK” but enough is enough as you finally lose your temper, silencing Jihyo by pushing your two left fingers into her wet pussy, your right hand starts groping one of her boobs while your lips connect with her own.
you three are now a mess.
You have Hyewon, her mouth fully coating your hardened shaft with saliva while her hands work diligently to massage your balls and inner thighs. Her eyes aroused by seeing you, fingering and groping her best friend to the points she stop messaging you with her right hand to finger herself to not leave herself out of the pleasure.
You have Jihyo, her eyes closed shut,  lost in the sheer amount of pleasure she receives and gives to you, each time your lips leaves her for attacking her neck she shouts a symphony of moans, but not for long before you continue to kiss her again
And then there’s you, feeling like the star of a porn video with two incredibly hot girls. Which you have never met before and now they are naked, hungry for your cock while you fuck them in various ways.
The only way you can describe this moment the three of you are sharing at the moment is heaven in hell.
“I AM SO CLOSE OPPA,” Jihyo shouts into the air, feeling her climax getting closer with each passing second. Yours is also not so far behind, as the suction of Hyewon's lips is driving you crazy.
However just as you were about to release your load into her throat, Hyewon swiftly lets her mouth out of your cock without any gag, she rises from her prone position and hovering closely above your cock, before quickly saying.
“I'm safe”
“Huh? What are you-OH FUCK” You dont have time to react as the deer-eyed slut impales her slick yet tight pussy directly on your dick, you could swear you see tears in her eyes from the pain she is feeling but its quickly replaced with tears of joy, signaling you that she wants this.
“UGHHH, YES” She curses loudly after the first explosion of cum erupts inside her. Then quickly comes the second, the third and even the forth, each pump gets Hyewon to a level of ecstasy she never felt before as she rolls her eyes backwards and lets her tongue hang out of her mouth while her orgasm flows onto the base of your dick.
At the same time your fingers also get coated by Jihyo's own fluids, moaning unintelligible words but it was clear that she was enjoying every second of her high. Eventually your mutual orgasm comes to an end, as you all fall into the bed, both girls on different sides while you are in between them.
For a moment the surrounding goes silent. No club music from outside the house, no chatter from drunk university students, the only sounds the three of can comprehend are each other’s synced up breathing, attempting to recover from your lust-filled haze. Finally, Hyewon gathers enough strength to talk.
“Oppa…are you…done” a breathy question came from her mouth as for the first time tonight, her eyes looked at yours with pure innocence.
You can't help but giggle at her question and lean forward to peck her lips. “I think with sexy you two are…i dont think i will ever be done” you respond.
“Oh, That's great to hear Oppa…” Jihyo interrupted your small talk with her friend. Take a look at her, her hair messy and ruffled, her entire body filled with a mixture of sweat and cum.
“Because…i haven't got your cum inside me yet…” she adds, her hands now go to her hair, smoothing it from any random strands and then parting it in the middle, creating two symmetrical ponytails from each side of her head.
“But…” another pause as she turns herself face down, letting herself gain control as she raises her body up while keeping her arms and knees on the mattress, her soft and curvy ass pointed up and directly at you before saying.
“I want it in my ass”
And just like that, you could feel yourself getting hard at the view, it's not hard to see how Jihyo's pussy is still wet and is leaking on the sheets, telling you that she is ready for her turn, but before you cave in to her request, her eyes turn toward Hyewon.
“Baby…i want to eat you out, i bet Oppa’s cum tastes as sweet as i think…” She gestures to her best friend, quickly Hyewon shifts in front of her face, sitting in a way that gives easy access to her pussy for Jihyo.
Realize that Jihyo's two ponytails are your handles, you grab each one with your hand, the blonde girl looks back at you one last time with a wide smile and shining eyes, signaling to you that she is ready for you.
And with that out of the way, you begin.
Starting a chain reaction, you pull both of Jihyo's ponytails and slam your cock deep into her asshole. In response, she elicits a moan but quickly she inches her tongue toward Hyewon’s entrance licking out some of your cum that was left over which causes Her to clamp her soft and meaty thighs around her best friend’s head and join Jihyo with her moans.
“Fuck, unnie…it feels so good” The deer-eyed girl moaned, quickly getting aroused again seeing her best friend eat her out while being pounded by you from behind.
“I know ugh baby…he ugh is so deep inside ugh my ass” Jihyo tries to mumble to her friend in between pounds from you and licks from her. Meanwhile, you are silent, lost in the cloudy haze of pleasure from how tight her ass is, only sometimes releasing a groan.
Eventually you start increasing your pace, and it seems that Jihyo’s enjoys it, mostly by the fact that she also starts moving her butt toward your dick, letting you hear breathy moans such ‘yes’ or ‘more’ while still having the energy to pleasure Hyewon, who was holding her best friend's head close to her pussy in order to get eaten out more often.
As you start feeling yourself getting closer to your ends, you mutter loudly. “Shit girls, I am gonna cum”.
“Load it in her ngh ass Oppa” Hyewon managed to respond, struggling to not vocalize her pleasure. “I bet my cock-slut unnie would love getting filled by your thick cum, just like you did to my pussy” she dirty talks, getting you one step closer to where they both want you.
“YES, PLEASE OPPA” Jihyo loudly moans while turning her face back to you. “CUM INSIDE ME, FILL MY SLUTTY ASS WITH YOUR COCK, AS MUCH AS YOU WANT”.
And then, you finally cave in to their requests as for the final time of the night, your cock shoots one last string of cum into Jihyo's ass, one last Lick of Jihyo's tongue into Hyewon’s Cunt and one time where Hyewon clamps her thighs on Jihyo’s head the three of you  moan from the sheer pleasure that overwhelms your bodies and then you all fall into the bed.
Once again the room is quiet, no one dares mutter a word, you all have enough strength to just look at each’s now with tired yet happy eyes.
And in your mind, only one thought pops in your head, and you know that both Hyewon and Jihyo were thinking about the same thing as well.
“Best. Sex. Ever”
================================================
Started writing in 6/8/2024
Finished writing in 7/8/2024
650 notes · View notes
shomixremix · 9 months ago
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THE ALTAR OF ADORATION ♥︎
recently i've been getting more and more into my zhongli brainrot (even though he's been one of my fav characters since forever lol) so here you all go!!
oh also tysm for over 1k notes, 100+ reblogs and 50 new followers!! you guys are the best <3 i really didn't expect that kind of support on my last post - turns out everyone likes some dragon men!! so i decided to write some more, here you lovelies go!!
tags: Zhongli, female! reader, dragon! zhongli, religious themes, sacrificial offering, smut, fluff, mating, breeding, creampie, monsterfucking
-> you have been chosen as a sacrifice to the great geo lord rex lapis, during a period where everyone believed he was mad at mortals. scared for your life and trembling, you now realize there was another problem troubling lord morax.
reqs open ♡︎ | minors DNI
great lord rex lapis roamed the earths and heavens for centuries, ruling the land of geo and its people through the thick and thin. they were very devoted followers, obeying his every wish.
however, the height of his reign has long passed, and people simply stopped caring about their archon. until recently.
crops began to wither, mines dried out, contracts were getting broken left and right - rex lapis has had enough of their careless behavior. his people have disappointed him, and this was a sign of his fury. if something wasn't to change, he would abandon them completely.
the people of liyue decided to recommit to their religion, prepared to offer the geo lord a sacrifice of any kind, just so he'd once again bless them. you, even though born in a time where people lost their respect for the geo lord, have always been a devoted follower, praying to him each day and leaving flowers and beautiful crystals under his statue of the seven.
already being a believer of the geo archon, you were chosen as the ceremonial sacrifice.
while nobody knew where rex lapis resided, the site of the ceremony was chosen to be on mt. hulao. as the crowds of people gathered from all over liyue around the lake on the top of the mountain, you stood in front of them, shaking. while you were a follower of morax, you didn't feel it was right to die for the sins of your people.
"it's time to pay our sacrifise!" yelled one of the townsfolk, holding your wrist in an iron grip as he he slit your palm with a sharp knife. you screamed out in pain as maroon blood dripped down your hand. the man who slit your hand placed a valuable cor lapis stone in it, watching as the orange stone quickly became stained with your red blood.
you held your breath as they placed you on the highest point of the mountain and pushed you off, chanting morax's name over and over.
falling seemed to last centuries, even though it was just seconds. you waited and waited for your body to hit the ground, tightening your hold on the cor lapis and in your head praying:
"rex lapis, if you're here, if you hear my prayer, please, i beg you, save me!"
suddenly, your feel onto something, tightly closing your eyes. was this... death?
you open your eyes and realize this wasn't any kind of afterlife - in fact, you were very much still alive, spread on top of the back of a large dragon. your mortality was confirmed by the sharp pain you still felt in your left hand.
"..r-rex l-lapis..?"
the dragon stayed quiet as you clutched his mane, holding on to him for dear life. he only let you get down once you were inside a large cave, seeming like it wasn't a part of the human world - no, this had to be an adepti realm.
an uneducated mortal maybe wouldn't be certain just who was standing between them, but you knew oh so very well. his goldenish brown scales, the big, honey-colored eyes and the tail which ended in a mosaic of clouds all gave him away. standing before you was the geo archon, the adeptus who saved your life even though you were a peace offering.
he stayed quiet, removing you from his back like it was nothing and moving to a completely different side of the cave, laying down on the cold ground with his back turned to you.
he was in no mood to talk, you knew, but you had to thank him for saving your life.
"lord morax..?"
he grumbled in response, steam coming out of his large nostrils.
"i cinserely thank you for saving my life... i was supposed to be a mere sacrifise, yet you still showed me mercy.. i.. just, thank you so much.."
the second the word "sacrifise" leaves your lips rex lapis perks up, turning to you with frantic eyes. he grabs your hand to inspect the still slightly bleeding cut, tearing a piece of your skirt to wrap around your wound as a bandage. morax tightly ties it, then quickly moves from you.
"it should stop the bleeding," he grumbled low, never turning to look at you, almost as if he was completely uninterested, "i will bring you to the villege tomorrow, little mortal. now sleep. your body needs rest"
how could you rest after such a traumatic experience? after almost having your life, all your hopes and dreams, unfairly thorn from you?
"no, i.. i can't return! they will all know that i failed, that i wasn't the sacrifise they all needed to save liyue from your punishment!"
morax huffs, his tail hitting the ground with a loud thump.
"then you can tell them all that i do not wish for a sacrifise. spilling innocent human blood is not only unecessary but also completely repulsive to me."
your eyes widen as he says this, your body instinctively moving a little closer to him: "you.. do not wish for a sacrifise, my lord? then how should we repay you for our sins? how can we ever make you forgive us for losing our faith in you..?"
rex lapis growls lowly, his body tightening like he was in some kind of discomfort or pain.
"the lack of my blessing isn't for the reasons your kind believes," he growled, "i'm not upset at you humans. now sleep." you knew well that that was an order, and an order coming from an archon must always be obeyed. yet, you didn't, scooting closer to him.
"the only thing to be upset about is that they sent you as the offering. how unfair it is to send one of my most devoted followers to die for my amusement.."
you hold your breath, afraid that he was actually considering killing you.
"i've recieved all the little treasures you leave out for me and have heard your every word. you're a persistant little one, aren't you?" even though you couldn't see him, you could feel the smirk on his face.
the knowledge that he has seen and heard how you worship him makes your heart thump loudly in your chest, a pool of pride and flusterness swirling in your belly.
suddenly, morax smells the air sharply, then started writhing on the ground in pain, cursing out a deep yet broken"fuck..!".
"are you in pain, my lord? can i do something to help?" you ask eagerly, wishing to help your saviour.
"move away!" he roared, steam coming out of his mouth. "go to sleep and stop talking to me when i ask, mortal!"
you frigtenedly to as told, laying down on the ground and turning away from him, squeezing your eyes shut. suddenly, you hear little muffled whines and cries coming from him, which immediately makes you look at him again.
his large head is completely flushed red, his lungs heaving up and down quickly. he panted out short little puffs of air, his eyes bloodshot ready and his body trembling slightly. you didn't know what was wrong with him, he acted like some kind of a wild animal in a rut-
"lord morax, are you.. in a rut..?" it was a shameful question to ask the archon, yet your curiosity got the better of you.
he huffed out, more and more in pain with every passing minute. "i haven't... hah... i haven't been in centuries... it's inevitable i go through it every couple of hundred years..."
morax groans, visibly in a lot of discomfort.
"and of course that when i'm in a rut they just have to send me a gorgeous woman as a sacrifice to worsen my state..."
your cheeks darken as he murmurs this, blood rushing to your head.
"how do i worsen your state..?"
"your arousal" he rasps, "i can smell it, little mortal. i can smell you, and it's torture. it pains every muscle in my body to resist you, but i have to; it's my duty"
your heart aches at his words.
"i can help" you breathe, unsure what you were even offering. his sharp eyes turn to you, piercing you with his gaze.
"no", his answer is short but stern, "i could kill you, i could harm you and leave you not remembering your own name. i cannot do that to my most devoted follower. not to you, y/n"
your heart stops, dropping to your feet.
"how do you know my name...?"
he groans as he explains: "i often wander around the mortal world in my human form, to feel closer to your kind... i have met you a couple of times during your prayer at the statue of the seven. i cannot use your pure body to breed when i know how much respect and hope you have in me. it would be betrayal to you, and you would never see me, nor my human form, the same"
"it pains me to see my archon in pain" you whisper as you get closer to the large dragon, your stomach stirring. you gently touch the scales down his back and feel how he shivers under your touches.
"i want... i want to help you, if i can... i want to help you through this.. you have helped me through the darkest points in my life, and even though i don't know who your human form is, i have a feeling i'm close to you even then... i just desire to help you, lord morax..."
"do you even understand what kind of help i need? what i will do to you if you allow me?"
you smile, running your hands through his shiny mane.
"yes, i understand. use me however you like, my lord."
his self control snaps, big paws pinning you down on the ground. he's panting like a dog as he nuzzles his head against your neck, tearing the rest of your skirt off. only left in a pair of underwear and a thin shirt, you tremble under the archon's touches.
"hm.. such a beautiful mortal..." he hums as he tears the rest of your cloth from your body, leaving you completely bare. you try to cover yourself with your arms, yet morax grabs them and pins them by your sides.
his large mouth comes in contact with your skin, licking, kissing and biting as he moved down. morax grazes your skin with his teeth, never biting down hard enough to draw blood from your veins. you had already done your sacrifice, more blood wasn't needed. his tounge moves from your neck to your exposed breast, swirling around your hard nipples, earning a little whimper from you.
then, he moves even lower, nipping at your stomach. he forces your tighs apart, burying his large head to your folds and forcing you to hold on to him by his horns. rex lapis tastes you eagerly, lapping up any slick your body oh so willingly gave him. you moaned and whined as he fucked you with his tounge, making you come almost instantly.
"ohhhh!! m-morax~ ahh..." you moan as he helps you through it, sharply tugging on your sensitive clit with his sharp teeth, always careful not to hurt you.
"celestia" he sighs into your slick folds, earning a tremble from you. "you taste devine, my dear. i haven't enjoyed such a sweet taste in centuries"
he shows you no mercy and continues to eat you out as if you were his last meal, one paw holding down your wrists and the other secured on your hips, not allowing you to move at all. after about three delicious highs he pulls from your frail body with his tounge, you start begging for the real thing. you knew his rut wouldn't be over unless he fucked you, and you were kinda hoping this torterous foreplay would be over soon...
"m-morax... please.." you whimper, squeezing your legs around his snout. he grumbles low, giving one final lick to your greedy pussy.
"i have to loosen you as much as possible so you could even try to take me. preperations can take up to days."
your eyes open wide and your mouth partens. you couldn't wait days to get him to fuck you, and you certainly didn't know how you'd survive days worth of eating out!
"but i cannot wait that long" he smirks, rubbing your outter tighs and ass. in one swift motion he flips you over so you were on your knees, face down and ass up. you feel his length rubbing up on you; even though you couldn't see him, your eyes went wide in shock. you felt how impossibly large he was, both in size and girth, almost being comparable to your legs.
but another thing surprises you - the head of his cock is poking at your tight entrance, but another thing is poking at your ass! you turn your head in shock, and he reassures you.
"i am different than a mortal, my dear"
you let out a loud scream of his name as he harshly thrusts both of his heavy cocks into you. he thrusts as far as he can, entering your cushy womb from how big he is and almost ripping your ass apart. you scream and cry and writhe yet he doesn't budge, letting you get used to him inside you for a few moments before he starts thrusting.
he starts moving without a warning, dragging you back on his cocks. you turn into a sobbing mess as each one of his thrusts so pleasantly tease your g-spot, bullying your tight walls.
"ahh.. ahhh! mphhh! mmphshs! m- mor... ah! ohhh!"
you cry and cry, not even knowing your own name out of so much pleasure. you feel like your holes are completely loose and yet, clamping down on him greedily. he tugs your head back by your hair, snuggling his nuzzle in your neck so you'd hear him better.
"shh, don't cry... you've asked me for this, little mortal. you asked to be fucked like this, hm? look at you, so pretty like this. so no need to cry, you will be fine. i allow you as much pleasure as you need. "
you couldn't stop yourself from coming, squirting your juices all over his cock. he watches this in amusement, fucking into you harder and faster. in one moment, he threw his head back in pleasure, making a loud roar.
"fuck, y/n..." he groaned as you hiccupped your sobs, finally giving a harsh, last thrust and stilling inside. you felt an impossible amount of warmth spread through your body as he filled you with seed, spilling a wave after wave of cum in your womb. he had filled you so much that it spilled from you, leaving you entirely breathless.
as soon as he's done he pulls out, letting you fall to the floor. he picks up your limp body, curling himself around you and cuddling you close.
"it's alright, my dear... you did perfect. you were just devine, and you've felt better than anything i've ever felt in all my years. rest, now. i will take care of the rest tomorrow."
your head hazy, your mind fuzzy with pleasure and your eyes heavy, you lay curled against him and finally get the much needed sleep.
the next morning, you wake up with a human, veined arm around your bare waist.
"there you are... you are too adorable in your sleep" a deep voice said from behind you, and you turned around, expecting to see the geo archon.
yet, you were faced with a man you knew all to well - the man you had deep feelings for ever since he first arrived in liyue harbour.
"mr. zhongli?!"
he hums out a laugh, tightening his hold on you.
"yes, if i'm correct, we've met in my human form a couple of times?"
you blush deeply, reminiscing on the few blissful times you talked to him. he was a very handsome, successful young man, with great wisdom and a clever mind - and you admired him very much, so much that you couldn't help but fall in love.
"you look dissapointed... are you not fond of me after finding out who i am?"
he asks, his gaze softening and looking almost saddened. you quickly reassure him:
"no, no, i'm not dissapointed! more like stunned.." you blush and he notices, twirling a strand of your hair between his fingers.
"oh? why is that? i have always assumed we had a fairly good relationship, y/n. you have always been so nice to me"
"i.. i've had feelings for you for quite a while..." you say shyly, almost embarassed of the fact.
his lips curl into a genuinely happy smile, his arms pressing you closer to his bare chest.
"then everything turned out alright"
you smile, but everything suddenly dawns on you - that zhongli seemed to be okay with your feelings for him, that you almost died yesterday as a sacrifice, that zhongli is morax and most importantly, that oh, you fucked the geo archon, in his dragon form no less!
"am i pregnant now..?" you ask quietly, reminded that the act of a rut is mainly to breed and create off-spring. zhongli laughs at your question, leaving a quick peck on your forehead.
"no, most likely not. but you will be, in a few hundred years, once i have to go through this all over again" you almost choke on your own spit as he says this.
"but... i won't be alive in a few hundred years... you will have to find another to help you through this.."
as soon as you mention him sleeping with another woman his face turns into one of disgust, his strong arms gathering your entire body in his hold.
"as my mate, you will live as long as i do, and i'm immortal, my dear."
"your mate?!"
"yes. by helping me through my rut, you have become my mate. of course, only if that's what you wish" he says, pressing a loving kiss to your eyelid. "and do not worry, my dear, dragons mate for life"
he almost purrs into your warm skin, making a referance to what you said about him sleeping with another woman.
"...being your mate.." you sigh, cuddling into his chest.
"it's like what you humans call "relationship" except a stronger bond, sort of an unbreakable contract between the two of us. a forever promise of care, love and loyalty."
"i think i would like that" you humm into his chest, "but, let's take it a little slow?"
he kisses you full of warmth, his hands soothing your sides.
"of course, my dear. i will take you on a proper date when we get back. for now, just lay there and let me thank you properly for your help last evening..." he sighs as he kisses your shoulder over and over again.
yesterday at this time of day you were supposed to be nothing but a sacrifice to the geo lord, and now here you were, getting your body worshiped by him, forever safe and secure in his arms as his mate.
2K notes · View notes
renjunphile · 5 months ago
Text
freedom ain't nothing but missing you ☆ jung sungchan
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ᯓ★ WORD COUNT: 13.6k
ᯓ★ PAIRING: riize's jung sungchan x female!reader
ᯓ★ TAGS & WARNINGS: college!au, second chance romance, college antics - partying, drinking, brief mentions of vomiting, reader has mad commitment issues you wanna punch her in the face, pining
ᯓ★ SYNOPSIS: the last time you saw him was when you looked over your shoulder at his weeping figure one last time at the airport. four seasons have passed and your heart tightens at the sight of his smiling face, wishing it was directed at you.
ᯓ★ NOTES: what would a renjunphile fic be without a second chance romance element ! sorry it's my favourite trope i can never let go of it :') all my stories are really the same now ! also me *handshake* using aespa members as side characters lol at the start of story, y/n and hyung line are going into 4th year, sohee and seunghan into 3rd year and anton into 2nd year.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
You hear your best friend's voice before you see her. If you had just looked a little more to the left, you would've spotted her immediately anyway as she waved a large piece of pink card-stock with your name displayed in a glittery explosion.
"Y/N! Over here!" she cooed at you loudly from behind the barrier, "Y/N!!!"
You quickly weave around the other passengers as expertly as you could with your trolley of bags, but Minjeong is quick to meet you at the exit. She drops the sign onto your cluster of suitcases and wraps her arms around your neck, squealing into your ear with glee.
"I missed you too, Jeong," you giggled at her embrace, "I told you that you didn't have to get me!"
She scoffed at you as she pulled away, "What kind of best friend would I be if I didn't welcome you back home after a year away! You said your parents couldn't come and meet you, so I came!"
You think back to your conversation just before you got on the god-awful long flight with her, recalling how your parents thought it was too far for them to drive up from your hometown when they were already coming the week after for your birthday.
"Thanks babe," you thanked her sincerely, bumping your hip against hers while the two of you began to push the cart together. You couldn't believe that you were able to pack your whole life in just two large suitcases and one small one, "By the way, how are we getting back into the city?"
Minjeong didn't drive; she'd rather walk to her destination in the wind, snow, hail or storm than learn how to get behind the wheel. She was a self proclaimed "passenger princess", which you admired and envied from the way your friends (including her) used you like their own personal taxi service when you had your car. Sadly for your friends, you were not hesitant when it came to selling your car at the end of your second year of university, just weeks before you packed up your life and moved to New York for the new school year. While you sometimes missed your slightly beat up Hyundai on the days that you had to get on the subway with arms full of groceries, you couldn't justify the purchase of a car again for your final year of university.
"I assisted the help of a special someone," Minjeong winked at you happily, watching your face contort in horror immediately, "Wait, no. Not that one. I promise."
You let out a sigh of relief that you didn't even know you were holding back as you cramped together in the car park's elevator. There were many people you haven't seen in a year. There were many people you've missed and wished to see. But you didn't think you could face him right now, at this very second.
"Who is it?" you prodded curiously, but she just gave you an innocent smile and pushed the cart out of the elevator and towards a shiny car about 30 steps from the doors
You couldn't make out the figure sat in the driver's seat, no matter how you craned your head until he got out and faced you straight on.
"Chanyoung!" you gasped in surprise, welcoming him in a tight hug, "Since when did you learn how to drive?"
"Just this year, noona. Welcome home!" he chuckled from above you. You wondered if he grew any more since the last time you saw him, cause it definitely felt like it.
Chanyoung was Minjeong's little cousin that began his studies at your university as you were leaving. Despite that, he grew to be a familiar presence as he lived nearby and always dropped by the apartment you shared with his cousin. He was truly one of your favourite people since he was so sweet and caring.
Before you could finish your greetings with Chanyoung, Minjeong had already loaded your (very heavy) bags into the trunk of Chanyoung's new car and had collapsed in the back seat, "Let's go guys. I'm sure Y/N's tired, but you can sit in the front."
Without another word, she dropped her head to the window and began to doze off. You clambered into the front seat and gave Chanyoung a thumbs up to head out.
"How was your first year at university, 'Ton?" you asked.
"Super good, actually. It was really helpful to know all of your friends before I entered so I never felt alone or lost or anything," he recounted the times that you missed, "By the way, thank you for letting me stay in your room. My first year definitely wouldn't be the same if I still lived at home."
You shared a two-bedroom apartment with Minjeong just off campus during your second year at university after meeting her on the first day of first year and becoming fast friends. You had warned her that you probably would have to find a temporary replacement while you were halfway across the world, but when word got out to her little cousin, he begged to take over your room while you were gone. Since he lived in Seoul already, his parents weren't very willing to let him test his luck and go into dorms with a stranger, but they were much more open to letting him live with his older and allegedly more responsible older cousin until he found friends to live with for the next year.
"No worries; I'd rather it was you than a stranger," you shrugged, "Who are you living with again?"
"Sohee and Seunghan," he tapped his finger on the steering wheel to the beat of the song quietly playing on the radio, "You know them, right?"
Your heart squeezed again at the thought of the boys you got to know in the year before you left, "Yeah, a bit. Haven't spoken to them in a long time, though. I hope it's not awkward to see everyone again, otherwise I'll just lock myself in my room until I graduate."
"Everyone misses you, noona," Anton assured you softly, "I know that for sure."
You opened your mouth to say what your heart desired, but closed it again hesitantly as your brain came to the rescue of your emotions. Anton flashed a look at you from the driver's seat, but chose not to comment when he saw the conflicted expression on your face.
"Tell me about your time in New York," his soft voice pulled you gently out of the mess that was unravelling in your head.
You gave him a small, knowing smile and began recounting your favourite memories and your life in the city that never sleeps.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
Around 4PM, you waved your parents away as they pulled out from the car park under your apartment complex. They had a pretty long drive back to your hometown with work early the next day, but you were grateful they made the drive up in the morning to celebrate your birthday with you. You had taken them to your previous favourite Italian restaurant for lunch, but after tasting more authentic cuisine in New York in the predominantly Italian neighbourhoods, you weren't sure if the restaurant was as good as you remembered it to be. Still, you enjoyed the lunch and catching up with your parents with what had happened in the last 6 months since they came to visit you abroad. With a hug and a kiss goodbye, they were driving away from you once again.
When you returned back upstairs to your apartment, Minjeong was waiting for you patiently on the couch with her legs and arms crossed and a mischievous smirk on her face.
"What?" you groaned in anticipation.
"I picked out an outfit for you while you were out. It's on the bed. Get ready," she grinned, clapping her hands together, "We have dinner plans. Meet back here in an hour and a half."
"That's really not necessary, Jeong," you pleaded, but she just turned her nose up at you, reiterating her instructions.
To be honest, you had planned to spend the rest of your birthday cuddled up on the couch with your best friend, probably watching a chick-flick or a horror or both. She stomped away to her room and you fearfully tiptoed to yours. Knowing her, she would have picked out something a bit more showy than you would like.
However, you were pleasantly surprised at the dress laid out on your bed, with a note in her handwriting. It wasn't something she picked out of your closet- it was a dress she had bought for you. It was a flowing mini dress with ruffles extending from the skirt and a corset bodice you knew would flatter you. You sent her a grateful text and began to freshen up your hair and makeup from your morning outfit.
From your outfit, you guessed it would be in a sit-down restaurant that was more refined than a bbq restaurant whose smoke would cling to your hair, skin and clothes for days. However, knowing Minjeong, you couldn't put anything past her. After all, she was the one that convinced you to drink soju with her at a stall on the side of a dirt road in your floor length silk dresses after your first year ball. An hour and a half later, you had curled and then re-curled your hair, did your eyeliner twice and marvelled at how the light pink dress your best friend bought you fit you like a glove. When you heard Minjeong calling out your name, you were finishing buckling the heeled Mary Janes that you loved and made sure that everything you could need for the night was in your purse.
In the week you had been back in Seoul, all you had done was unpack your suitcases and make the room feel like yours again. School wasn't starting for another week, so all the friends that you tried to meet up with told you that they were still in their hometowns, due to come a few days before the fall semester began.
"Urgh, I knew it would look amazing on you!" Minjeong analysed you in awe. Trust the fashion design and marketing major to have an eye for these types of things.
"Are you going to tell me where we're going?" you eyed her suspiciously as she looped her arm around yours and dragged you out of your shared apartment.
"You can find out when we get there," Minjeong tapped on her phone, "The taxi's outside, quick!"
The destination set for the taxi was somewhere you weren't familiar with. The street name definitely didn't ring a bell. Perhaps a new restaurant had opened in that area while you were gone and Minjeong was just trying to catch you up to the city again.
Speaking of the girl beside you, she spent the whole ride with her eyebrows furrowed together as she furiously tapped away on her phone. You wouldn't say that you were a particularly nosy person (lie), but her privacy screen protector made it impossible for you to see who she was texting. It was probably Heeseung anyway- her on-again, off-again boyfriend of four years, but more like two.
"Are you guys fighting again?" you teased.
"Huh?" she looked up at you in confusion and her face flashed with recognition, "Yeah, yeah. It's nothing. Don't worry, but look we're basically here."
Apparently 'here' meant on the street that was lined by endless blocks of high rise flats and a few convenience stores dotted about.
"Did you make me dress up to eat ramen at a GS25?" you prodded your finger in the direction of the store.
Minjeong laughed heartily, "No silly! I made you dress up to eat ramen at a 7/11!" she pointed at the stripy neon sign at the opposite end of the street. She captured your arm in hers once more, tugging to make you walk with her, "Just trust me. It's the hottest place in town."
You don't think that the hottest place in town was Block 7 of this high rise complex, but you say nothing as she buzzed for apartment 08 and caught the lift up to the 4th floor. Minjeong was known to find all the hottest spots in town, so you really try to keep it to yourself as she knocked on the door that looked far too much like an apartment door, including the mail next to the door mat.
She didn't even wait for someone to answer, just pushed down on the handle and nudged for you to enter into the darkness.
"Surprise!"
You clasped a hand over your mouth as light flooded the room and a group of about 20 people screamed at you. From behind you, Minjeong was cheering, pushing you further into what now seemed to be an apartment instead of a restaurant. With 20 pairs of eyes staring at you all at once, it took you a few seconds to shake yourself out of the shock and recognise anyone. The place was decorated with banners and balloons of your favourite colours, with steaming food on the dining table in the corner of the room.
"Happy birthday! Welcome home!" Karina, Yizhuo and Giselle were the first to crush you ina hug.
"We're sorry we declined your plans to hang out," Yizhuo pouted, "We thought we would give away the surprise that Jeong planned if we saw you."
You waved a dismissive hand at your younger friend, "It's okay. This is so sweet of you guys!" You felt Minjeong join the embrace.
"We thought you deserved it since we didn't get to spend your birthday with you last year," Giselle added on as the group pulled away from you.
Last year, you had spent your birthday alone, wandering around New York City for the first time and procuring free birthday goods from all the establishments that offered it.
"Happy birthday, Y/N!" you heard a deeper voice coo at you as you were pulled away from your girls. You were suddenly face to face with one of your closer guy friends from before.
"Eunseok!" you accepted his side hug, "Hi!"
"Welcome home! We all missed you so much," at his words, you dart your eyes around the room and find 5 boys hiding behind Eunseok's tall figure. They each hug you one by one, ending with Chanyoung who gives you the cheekiest grin.
"Welcome to our apartment," he grinned proudly, gesturing at himself, Sohee and Seunghan.
"Where'd you get all this money from, huh? I should've charged you more rent," you teased, eyeing the modern, open-plan space. The floor to ceiling windows on one wall of the room with a view over the river really sold you on the idea that this was an expensive apartment.
"You can throw as many parties as you like here," Shotaro giggled, "We know we're going to!"
"Yeah, whose birthday is it next?" Wonbin pondered.
"Oh! It's-" Eunseok smacked Sohee in the stomach before he could finish his words, laughing nervously.
The 6 boys in front of you watched in despair as your smile fell ever so slightly before you recovered it again.
"I'll go say hi to everyone else," you murmured softly, catching Wonbin's regretful face.
"Y/N, he's-"
"It's okay, Bin," you smiled softly, ignoring the pounding in your heart and head, "I wouldn't have expected him to come. He probably hates me, right?"
You turned around without letting any of the boys say another word, joining your group of friends from your dance club. While your friendship with them was something you treasured deeply, you fell out of touch with them in your year abroad quite quickly. You didn't put much thought into the people that did or didn't keep in contact, considering you were focused on making friends and trying to live in the moment abroad. Besides, you were coming back anyway. What's a year in the grand scheme of things?
Your heart panged at that thought, but you tried to push it away as Jisung tackled you in a tight hug. Ryujin and Yeji had to physically peel the towering kid away from you as you dove into conversation about what you had spent the last year doing.
As the conversation came to an end, your eyes fell on the 6 boys stood around in a circle, whispering hushedly and stealing quick glances at you. When you caught Seunghan's eye, he just chuckled nervously and dismissed you, but the sight of them, incomplete, caused your heart to tense up.
All the most important people in your university life was in this room. All, except one.
"Jeong, I'm just gonna catch some air. Just quickly," you tapped your best friend on the back, just before waving and greeting her potentially current boyfriend Heeseung.
"Oh, I'll come with!" she began to untangle herself from his embrace, but you just clicked your teeth and shook your head.
"No, it's okay. I can go alone; I'll be quick. Just buzz me up when I ring?" you requested. She gave you an unsure look, but settled back into Heeseung's form.
Ignoring the stares on your back, you ran down the two flights of stairs and pushed open the door to outside. Since it was the start of fall and 6pm, the sun was beginning to go down. The sky wasn't yet pink and purple, but instead glowing an ethereal gold, bathing you in light rays. You fiddled with the phone in your hand, grasping it tightly as you debated what to do. His contact was staring up at you, almost taunting you to do something with it. Call it? Message it? Delete it?
Your finger hovered over the phone symbol. Surely he'd want to hear from you, right? The way you ended things wasn't... satisfactory. It gave neither of you closure. You needed to speak to him, right?
Fuck it, you think to yourself. It's your birthday. You can do whatever you like. As you pressed the call button, you shakily lifted the phone up to your ears, counting the rings.
Ring ring, ring ring, ring-
"Y/N?" his voice is familiar, soothing the nerves that plagued you at the thought of him letting your call go unanswered.
"Sungchan," you began hesitantly, "I'm not sure if anyone told you, but I'm uh- I'm back in Seoul."
"Y/N," he repeated, making you aware of the sounds of his feet hitting the pavement through the phone and his laboured, shaky breaths.
"Shit, are you busy? Am I interrupting something?" your stomach folded in on itself as you realised he didn't answer your statement. He was probably at the gym- Minjeong told you he'd taken that up in your absence.
"Y/N," he breathed out again, the patters of his feet coming to a stop, "Look up."
You tore your eyes away from your feet- the only thing that was distracting you from internalising too hard that you were calling your kind-of ex-boyfriend.
As you lifted your eyes up, a tall figure came into view across the street from you. Sungchan was stood panting, one hand holding his phone up to his ear and the other holding a bouquet of flowers.
"Sungchan?" the call dropped as the figure took a step into the street, hastily running over to stop just shy from you.
"I don't hate you," it's the first time you're hearing his voice in one year, "The boys- they said that you said- I wanted to come, but I didn't know if you wanted me here."
He's trying to maintain eye contact, but he's clutching the flowers to his chest as he pants. You were at ease enough to chuckle, "Sungchan, did you run here?"
In this light, his eyes shined and sparkled. You've missed looking into them and getting lost all night in his gaze. You missed the way he would look at you like you were the most precious thing on earth to him.
He flashed you a toothy smile, "Mhm, didn't want to make you wonder. Just wanted to tell you that."
"A text would've sufficed."
He analysed your expression and took one large step back, "Ah, am I reading this wrong? Did you not want me to come?"
You took one step forward, "I'm sorry I didn't call as soon as I got back."
Relief flooded Sungchan's whole body as he stretched his arm to offer the bouquet to you, "It's whatever. Happy birthday, Y/N."
"Thanks, Sungchan," you smiled sincerely, "Do you want to head up now together? I'm kind of hungry and I think there's pizza."
"Yeah, sure!" his face is practically lit up at your invitation, but he hesitated to follow you, "Y/N?"
"Yeah?"
"I missed you," he whispered shyly, "Just so you know."
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
You met Sungchan three weeks into your first year of university. Minjeong's boyfriend Heeseung had joined the soccer team in the first week and their first game came around quickly. The two of you were like two peas in a pod, bundled up together in matching scarves bearing your university's colours and logo, shivering on the school's bleachers.
Your friend's eyes were trained on her boyfriend from home, but you had the lucky status of being able to cast your eyes on each player and make your judgement. The game had been going on for about 30 minutes with your school being 2-0 up. Both goals had been scored by the team's #23, a scrawny tall boy whose name you could just about make out from your distance.
"Jung's pretty good," you hummed to your friend.
"#23? His name's Sungchan, I think. Hee says he's really nice. Want me to get you two acquainted?" Minjeong wiggled her eyebrows at you, but you rolled your eyes.
You were determined to find love as naturally as possible at university. Back home, you'd been on a few first days with a few guys set up through your friends, but they were all the same to you- not cute enough, not interesting enough. You hadn't been desperate to get into a relationship, especially knowing that you were going to apply to spend your third year abroad if you kept your grades up. But when Sungchan slid in to the seat beside yours for your shared lecture meeting your GenEd requirements, you had lost all semblance of that.
"Hey, you're Y/N, right?" he had offered his hand out to you, "I'm Sungchan. I've seen you around with Heeseung's girlfriend and I've seen you in this lecture a few times."
You had taken his hand in yours, gripping firmly and giving him a shy smile, "Yeah, that's me. Nice to meet you,"
When he continued to sit beside you for another few weeks, asking you questions in hushed whispers and explaining concepts to you when you looked lost, you said nothing. When he started asking if you wanted to study in the library together in your two hour gap after your shared lecture, you said nothing. When library study-seshes turned into studying at a cafe where he'd buy you a drink, you said nothing. When that turned to just two hours of the two of you chatting and getting to know all about each other's lives with your laptops abandoned on the table, you said nothing.
It then turned into butterflies slowly erupting in your stomach as his face lit up the second he saw you in the theatre. It turned into your heart beating a little faster whenever his hand brushed against yours on the walk to the café you now frequented with him. It turned into finding comfort in him as he slowly began introducing you to his best friends, who would tease you endlessly. It turned into nervous giggles and pink cheeks as you spent the whole fall and winter denying anything was going on with you and Jung Sungchan.
When spring of your freshman year began to roll in, Sungchan had mustered up the courage to take your hand in his whenever your fingers did graze each other on the walks. Whenever you'd look up at him to question it, he'd just smile slyly and look off into the distance, quickly changing the topic before you could address it.
Spring break had you realising how much of a presence he was in your life. Walking through the parks of your hometown felt melancholy without him by your side. Studying at a cafe alone was productive, but you would miss the way that every time you looked up from your screen, he'd already be staring back at you, a soft smile permanently etched on his face.
Cherry blossom season was your favourite time of the year. So when you returned to your campus and found out the main square was lined with these bloomed trees, you had dragged Sungchan there immediately, even if he had just arrived from his hometown.
The joy in your eyes must have been so evident, reflecting back in his eyes as sparkles. When Sungchan had placed his hands on your shoulders to stop you bouncing, and then leaned his head down closer to yours, you didn't stop it. You had long been used to the way he made your heart race. It was a welcome feeling as he softly planted his lips on yours for the first time under the falling petals.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
"Y/N," the sharp voice plucked you from your daydream, a bag making a thud on the wooden table, "What are you thinking about?"
"Huh?" your eyes focused in on Karina taking a seat in front of you at the café, "Nothing, nothing. Did you just have class?"
"My class ended early and I was just walking to my next class in 15, but I saw you through the window looking all sad and aloof," she explained, her eyebrows drawn together in worry, "Are you okay, girl?"
You met Karina with Minjeong at a club in the first week of your freshman year. She had been throwing up in the toilet with the door open and no one holding her hair, so Minjeong did that while you rubbed her back and cooed reassuring words. After confessing that she was getting drunk because she had just broken up with her high school boyfriend, the two of you captured her in your little group.
"It's just weird being back," you admitted.
She pouted at you sadly, "Aw, don't tell me you like your New York friends better than us?"
"No!" you squealed, laughing, "It's not that. I love you guys. It's just weird being back with Sungchan."
Her eyes morphed into a mix between empathy and sympathy, "Aw, babe. I'm sorry; I know it's weird. Whenever I meet my friends back home, I get a weird feeling seeing my ex there too. I imagine it must be worse for you since you ended on better terms than me and Mark did. It must be confusing, huh?"
Out of all your friends, Karina was the best one to be having this conversation with. While you loved Minjeong more than anything in the world, she was famous for breaking up with her boyfriend for random spats, but calling him and asking to get back together the very next moment she missed him. Absolutely no sense of longing in that department.
"I just don't know how I should act around him. Do we just go back to being friends like in first year? Should I pursue him again? Why does it feel like we're strangers to each other?"
During your party, you had thought Sungchan would stay by your side, but he quickly excused himself to join his friends and only gave you reluctant smiles through the night. Where had all the confidence disappeared to?
You saw him one more time in the two weeks after your party at the library. Eunseok had booked a large private study room at the library and texted you to come. Sungchan was already there when you came, his head stuck in a textbook. Other than shooting you a greeting and sliding the box of cookies in your direction, you got nothing else from him in three hours.
"You just need to get the worst of it over and talk to him. He must be just as confused as you are, to be honest," Karina sighed.
"He hasn't found someone else, right?" you asked reluctantly. Even if he had, it would have been your own fault anyway after the way you left him for dust at the airport.
Karina scoffed and rolled her eyes, "The only thing he's found in the past year is the gym. Taro says he's gone crazy. You know- post break-up glow up? He's become quite the heartbreaker, actually. All these girls started to notice him, but he never gives any of them the time of day."
You fight the scowl threatening to display on your face, "Oh, really?"
"Please, Y/N, he was always going to wait for you. I'd never seen a man so down bad and I know Heeseung." she scrunched up her face at the thought. Heeseung was famously untouchable by the girls at university, no matter how much they threw themselves at the football captain. Anyone else would be embarrassed by getting broken up with by their girlfriend every couple of months, but Heeseung always took it with stride and came crawling back with on his hands and knees towards her every time.
"Hm, you're wrong. I don't think anyone can beat that man," the memory of him scoring a hat-trick in the regional final with the words 'Take me back, Minjeong' written on his undershirt that he flashed while he celebrated the last goal cemented his position of number 1 loverboy in your mind.
"Potentially, but Sungchan drove four hours overnight to your hometown when your pet hamster died to comfort you in the summer between first and second year," Karina reminded you, "He charmed your strict parents so hard that by the time the night came, they let him stay in your room with you!"
"He brought expensive melons," you rolled your eyes, "I don't even know where he got those from at 2 in the morning."
"Exactly. Even I wouldn't gift my in-laws that expensive of a fruit no matter how much I wanted to impress them," she countered, "Just talk to Sungchan, I beg. I don't want to watch you go through the whole will they-won't they song and dance of first year again. I gotta go to class, but text him now, yeah?"
You dumbly nodded at her instruction, watching her race out of the cafe and waving goodbye through the large window. Everyone always teased you about how much Sungchan seemed to like you. They never knew that you were equally as smitten.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
You made it to the café before Sungchan. Unfortunately, that just gave you more time to panic and stress over what you were going to say to him after all this time. Your chocolate frappe and his iced americano sat in front of you, slowly melting in the unrelenting sun. You asked to meet at 1 and there was still 5 minutes 'til then, but Sungchan had the habit of being early. That was one thing he passed down to you.
"Y/N," Sungchan gave you a gentle smile as he slid into the seat across you. It was hard to meet his eye, but you held eye contact for as long as you could (not very long) before you tore your eyes away and slid his drink over to him. He thanked you sincerely and took a sip, giving you the chance to speak first.
"Thanks for meeting me, Sungchan," you began nervously, "I know it's been, um, confusing recently- at least for me. I just wanted to catch up and see where we are or get some closure, I guess. I feel like you deserve more of an explanation than what I was able to give you."
In an instant, you're transported back to one week before your flight to New York in the comfort of his bed. You had tearfully explained how hard you thought it was going to be to do long distance even when you had spent a better part of the situationship deluding yourself and each other that it would work out not matter what.
You don't think you could ever forget the look of heartbreak plastered on his face as you spilled your worries to him that night. You don't think you'd ever forgive yourself for making his body shake with sobs, pleading you to think about it again.
That's why it's hard to face him right now- because of all the shame and guilt.
"To be honest, Y/N, you told me before we got involved that you were doing your year abroad and that you didn't think it would be in the best interest of either of us to be in a new relationship by the time you left," Sungchan hummed, swirling his straw in the ice of his drink.
Suddenly, it's a year and a half earlier in your head as you and Sungchan celebrated and 'not really 1 year anniversary' because you two refused to label yourselves as a couple despite functioning identically to one. You remembered the cake, the flowers, the candles that you blew out together.
"I feel like I led you on," you admitted.
"Maybe," he shrugged, "I don't feel that way. You didn't want to get into a relationship, but I kept pursuing you anyway until you fell in- until you liked me," he coughed.
Your demeanour softened as the words slip from his mouth. When Sungchan tried to utter those three words to you at the airport for the first time and you stopped him before you could, you instantly knew you were making a mistake. But by the time you had gotten through security and settled yourself at your gate, you had manipulated yourself to think otherwise.
"Stop being so nice about it, Sungchan. I did you so wrong," you frowned deeply at him, picking at your nails in nerves. Your heart and stomach honestly ached in displeasure every time you thought about what happened.
"We made choices, and I guess we're better people now for it," Sungchan returned a tight-lipped smile, turning his head to stare out of the window and into the street.
When you left, Sungchan was shy and awkward with his limbs flying all over the place and never seeming like he had control over them. His hair fell around his eyes in an adorable cut and it would take him a while to muster up the courage to look anyone in the eye. That wasn't to say he wasn't a friendly and amazing guy- just one that had to warm up to you.
The Sungchan you returned to walked with confidence and seemed like he was now sure of himself. He kept his head up, initiated conversations with people and just moved through life more freely. You can't help but think that you were the one thing holding him back.
You didn't know what to reply with. Were you really better off? You had spent the past year trying to enjoy your life abroad, but grovelling with guilt for the life back home that you left.
Before you can open your mouth, someone beats you to it.
"Channie?"
The affectionate nickname falling from another person's mouth instantly conjures a bitter taste in your mouth. Your heads snap towards the guest standing at the edge of the table, smiling down at the man in front of you.
"Ah, I knew it was you," she beamed brightly, "Haven't had the chance to talk to you- how was your summer?"
Sungchan's eyes flickered to you so quick that you almost didn't catch it. You could tell he was hesitant in his reply, "It was good, Jiyoon. How was yours?"
She clapped her hands a little and nearly let out a squeal, "Awesome! Went to that mountain you recommended climbing! You're playing at the game tomorrow, right?"
Game? Oh, he was still on the soccer team, of course.
"Yeah," his grin was lopsided and awkward as he turned to you, "Um, Jiyoon, this is Y/N. Y/N, this is Jiyoon. We met in class last year."
"Nice to meet you," she extended a hand down to you, which you reluctantly shook with a terse smile. You could practically feel the uncertainty and jealousy bubbling in the pits of your stomach as she continued, "Me and Channie were seat mates in our lectures last year! It's such a shame we don't share any this year."
The feeling is so unfamiliar that it makes you uncomfortable seeing the way she grinned and looked at him. He used to look at you like that too- the longing and the pining in the gaze when you wouldn't give into him. It was clear they weren't dating, but it felt like there was something more.
"Nice to meet you too," you clutched your drink tight in your hand as you picked up your bag, "I actually have to run somewhere so why don't you take a seat and catch up? Seems like it's due. Bye Sungchan."
In your rush away from the table, Sungchan caught your wrist again, "Y/N, don't-"
Once again, you'll never forget the face of heartbreak written all over his face as you pulled your wrist away with a sigh, "Thanks for speaking to me, Sungchan. Good luck for tomorrow."
You don't dare look back as the bubbly Jiyoon slid into the chair you were once occupying.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
Minjeong has her arms crossed in your doorway with a pointed look directed at you.
"Why aren't you ready?" she squinted her eyes menacingly at your slumbering position on the bed, "We're going to be late! You're lucky I asked Sunghoon to save us two seats."
You pulled the covers over your head, "I'm not going. Leave without me."
The little pitter-patter of her footsteps on your hardwood floors echoes before she ripped the sheets away from you, "And why is that?"
You made grabby-hands at the duvet, but she tossed it behind her. You gave her your best innocent look and produced a cough, "I'm sick?"
Minjeong scoffed loudly and tugged on your arm, "I'm not taking no for an answer, missy. This is your final first game of the season! And we're playing our rival team, so show some school spirit."
"But 'Jeong," you whined in protest as she threw open your wardrobe and began to search for your school merch.
"You don't have to see him if you don't want to," she sighed empathetically, "We'll run away as soon as it's done, but you loved school football games, right?"
It's about the time you realised that Minjeong wasn't going to let up on her insisting, so you slipped on the crop top and jacket with your school's logos and shimmied into the skirt she was making you wear, despite the temperature outside. Arm in arm, but in measured silence, the two of you fast-walked to the football arena that was only 15 minutes from your house. Thankfully the game hadn't yet started when you two clambered into the seats between Sunghoon, Heeseung's friend, and Anton.
"It's nice to see you again, Y/N!" Sunghoon grinned, taking you into a hug, "Did you miss Korea while you were gone?"
"Of course, but it was nice to experience a new culture for a bit," you replied, trying your hardest to keep your eyes off the pitch where the teams were getting into their positions, "How's the skating?"
"I won college nationals this year," he said proudly, to which you clapped and congratulated him. He was truly one of the school's pride and joy, but he didn't want to take it any further than collegiate sport, "Anyway, are you going to the after-party later? It's at the Rho Zeta house."
Minjeong's face planted into your right shoulder, "We are!"
"Jeong! You said we're leaving straight after the game!" you protested, turning your body to face her's.
"Yeah, to the party," she cackled, slapping an arm around her cousin's shoulders, "Tell her, Chanyoung. We're going to the party, right?"
His eyes suddenly turned pleading and you knew you were doomed for, "C'mon, Y/N! It's the first party of the year win or lose so you have to come."
Sunghoon looked at you with expectant eyes too and you honestly believed they were about three seconds away from begging on their knees when you rolled your eyes and dismissed them. Minjeong took this as a win and began to cheer, while also redirecting your attention back to the game in front of you.
When you were dating/not-dating, you used to come to every one of Sungchan's games wearing his jersey rain or shine. That's how you gained the status of being one of the most notorious couples in the grade. You didn't know why, but you were glad to see that no other girl was sporting his name and number on their back from what you could see. They weren't a famous team; they didn't sell jerseys with the players' names in the school store, so you were a little bit relieved to realise Sungchan wasn't giving out his jerseys to girls left, right and centre in your absence.
What was evident though, was the rambunctious screaming every time the ball fell at his feet. He was one of the team's star players along with Heeseung and Lee Minho, so you weren't surprised. However, the cheering had definitely stepped up a notch ever since he checked himself into the gym while you were gone.
The game passed by pretty quickly. Both defences were very good, so there weren't many goals scored. Heeseung had scored two both assisted by Sungchan and the other team had done the same. Though the game ended in a eventful tie, the crowd was still buzzing with pride and school spirit. Through the streets around the arena and the campus, you could hear them chanting some school songs.
"Are we meeting Heeseung there?" you asked Minjeong curiously as you walked together towards Greek row. Sunghoon had disappeared after the win to find some of his friends before the party, meanwhile Chanyoung was whisked away by Seunghan into the crowd
"Yeah, they'll be a while before they get to the house, I think. I know I was heavy persuading you earlier, but you're actually fine with coming to the party, right? You can tell me if not," her eyebrows are stitched together in worry, but you just link arms again and continued walking.
"It'll be nice to go out and do my normal things," you reassured her.
The Rho Zeta house was one that was very familiar to you. It was a house you had spent many a nights in during your second year when Sungchan lived at his frat house. You wondered if he stayed there or moved out with his friends.
There's some rushing freshmen on the door duty and you were let in swiftly when Minjeong uttered your names. Though Heeseung was a member of a different fraternity, the friends and partners of the football team were always invited to the post-game ragers. Making your way down to the basement where most people chose to spend their time, you waved to Eunseok in the kitchen making cocktails.
A fair few spectators had already made it to the party after the game finished, knocking back their third, fourth or fifth beer or beverage of choice already. When Wonbin pressed a shot into your hand and clinked it with the one in his, you had no choice but to chug it down with a grimace. Before you knew it, Eunseok was tipping back a cup of mojito down your throat and you and Minjeong were doing shots of tequila with your arms intertwined.
The Rho Zeta basement was expansive, but very busy. There were people playing beer pong in one corner (Sohee was losing badly to a grinning Anton) meanwhile sober monitor Shotaro was trying to pry the darts out of a drunk Seunghan's grip before he could try to throw them and potentially hurt someone. You swore that they kept those locked away in a cabinet during parties, but Seunghan was always a crafty guy.
Endless bodies swayed in the gaps of the basement to the rhythm of the music- the music being the mixes that Nu Sigma Tau alumni Johnny Suh was producing from his speakers in the far corner. He was truly a man stuck in his college days, but he always provided the best tunes. You had lost track of time early into the night before losing track of Minjeong completely when the football team arrived. You hid behind Johnny's equipment, making small (loud) talk with him about what he had been getting up to. In the corner of your eye, you had spotted Sungchan hovering in the crowds since he was probably a whole head taller than most of the attendees.
"I heard what happened to you and our bambi over there," Johnny uttered nonchalantly as he prodded at some buttons that you could never grasp the use of, "How's that working out?"
"It's the consequences of my own actions," you hummed sadly, "I've never regretted anything more."
"Does he know that?"
You flick your glance to the guy chatting with his best friend Eunseok by the wall, "I think I owe it to him to let him move on. There's so many girls interested in him since I left."
"And clearly he rejected all those girls if he came alone. I'm banishing you from my booth, so go talk to him." Johnny cooed at you before pushing you lightly away and into the crowd with a wave.
After the fiasco that was the café and Jiyoon, you certainly weren't prepared to face Sungchan. What could you even say to him? That you were burning with jealousy that you couldn't help but run away?
Yizhuo and Giselle occupied your time for a little bit on the couches, but once the smell of sweaty party goers began to invade your senses even while getting progressively drunker, you dashed/stumbled up to the second floor living room that was always much more chilled out.
"Y/N!" Soobin cried out excitedly as you entered the large room. He was already reaching over to offer you a beer, which you took. Behind Soobin's tall stature, you don't even notice the people sat in a circle behind him, "We're playing truth or dare."
Soobin was one of your friends you made in a club you joined in your freshman year. You didn't speak to him very much over text, but the two of you always had a good time when seeing each other. He wrapped his large hand around your wrist and dragged you over to sit in the circle. You recognised a few familiar faces as you cast your eyes around, namely Karina and some of Heeseung's friends, but your heart dropped when you saw Sungchan and Jiyoon sat cross-legged next to each other a few spaces to right of Soobin.
Even in your state, you weren't so much of a masochist to stay and watch. Leaning over to Soobin's ear, you whispered, "Shit Bin, I think I'm gonna sit this one out."
"No," he whined like a baby, "I haven't seen you in a year, so stay!"
His protest was so loud that it called the attention of some of your other friends who all drunkenly pouted and pleaded for you to stay. Some guy who you recognised as Sunwoo reached over the space in the middle and spun the bottle. You kept your eyes trained on it as spun around and around, praying it wouldn't land on you. A sigh of relief left your mouth as it fell on Chaerin, who quickly chose dare.
"Text your most recent ex and tell them that you miss them!" Sunwoo giggled through his drink.
As you nursed your own drink, you mirrored Chaerin's grimace and fought all your might to avoid looking at Sungchan. You would be horrified to have received that. Chaerin gingerly pulled out her phone and typed a few words before flashing her screen around the circle as proof. She then grabbed the bottle and spun it harshly.
"Jiwoo, truth or dare?" Chaerin taunted. Your eyes flashed to her figure momentarily as she giggled and chose dare as well.
"Kiss the person you'd most want to date."
You don't think you've ever felt such burning sadness as you watched Jiwoo quickly grab Sungchan's face and bring it down to hers for a quick peck. The grip on your bottle was nearly enough to smash the glass into a million pieces the way your heart was breaking.
It took everything in you not to get up and run away, especially when the alcohol in your bloodstream was making you feel your emotions ten times as strong. You couldn't make it about you- Sungchan didn't deserve that. The rest of the group's eyes had already turned to you after Jiwoo's kiss, considering that you and Sungchan never really kept it much of a secret. Even Karina  was making 'are you okay?' eyes at you from across the circle. You simply gave her a subtle nod and a smile as Jiwoo spun the bottle too.
"You and Sungchan aren't back together?" Soobin dropped his face low to your ear.
"Does it look like we are, Soob?" you exhaled, watching Nayoung give Jay a drunk and joking lap dance.
"Shit," he breathed out under his breath, "Sorry I made you stay."
"It's okay. I should move on anyway, right?" you smiled assuringly at him. You don't think you've ever given such a fake smile in your life.
"Y/N," Soobin trailed off, trying to pry the bottle that you were sipping on away from your hands, "Should we go?"
"No, it's fine," you gritted out, pointing at the bottle spinning to direct his attention. Your heart dropped as it landed on you.
"Truth or dare, Y/N?" Jay mumbled.
You weren't going to risk it; Jay was known for giving batshit ideas, so you settled on, "Truth."
"How many people did you sleep with or kiss on your year abroad?" he smirked.
"Zero," you deadpanned instantly, "For both."
Jay pouted at your boring answer, but gestured for you to choose the next person. It landed on Yuri, who chose dare bravely. You were starting to dissociate a little, but managed to murmur some dare about giving her phone to Sunghoon and letting him post whatever on her story.
The game continued a while with you trying to focus as much as possible at burning a hole through the glass of your drink with Soobin asking you if you were okay every couple of minutes. It was hard not to turn your head and steal glances at Sungchan and Jiwoo, whose laugh reverberated through the room, your bones and then into your heart.
You were certain Jiwoo was a nice girl, but where did she come from? All your friends convinced you that Sungchan hadn't entertained anyone despite the newfound attention that you leaving brought to him and even his friends never mentioned anything when they would occasionally talk to you. Surely Jiwoo and Sungchan were close, right? Close enough for them to be recommending each other things to do in the summer and close enough for Jiwoo to quite literally kiss him in front of everyone.
"Sungchan, truth or dare?" an unfamiliar voice caused your head to slowly lift up.
"Dare," it's the first time you've heard his voice the whole game.
"Kiss the person you'd want to date in this room."
A light gasp escaped nearly everyone's lips as you examined the smirking player. You definitely didn't recognise him; maybe he was a freshman. His eyes were darting with a cheeky glint between Sungchan and Jiwoo, assuming that he was setting up a couple by echoing Chaerin's earlier dare for him.
"Taesan, choose a different dare," Karina's voice boomed as she directed laser eyes towards the boy. He instantly frowned.
"Why? It's fun!"
"Choose a different dare," Soobin repeated next to you.
In that moment, you wanted the world to just cave in and swallow you up whole. You didn't think that you could bare to watch your ex-boyfriend- the one who held your heart but the one whose heart you stomped all over- kiss another girl in a confession. Despite that, you were completely paralysed in your spot, cross legged and head having turned to Sungchan's direction.
At the same time that Karina began to get up and say, "Y/N, let's go downstairs,", Sungchan had pushed himself out of his seat under the watchful eyes of Jiwoo.
"Fuck it," he had laughed dryly.
Your vision changed in a moment's notice. Sungchan was staring straight into your eyes bearing the emotions of pleading. Pleading to ask you if what he was about to do was okay.
You think that you probably nodded unconsciously, because in an instant, Sungchan's plump lips found yours again for the first time in a year. They slotted perfectly in between your hesitant mouth, but like a reflex, your brain had finally connected to your body again and started moving against him.
Similar to the earlier gasps from all those who had known about your history together, the whole group had gasped and fell silent as they watched the scene unfold.
The kiss was not gentle at all. He moved against you harshly, desperately and his hands on your cheeks burned your skin, lighting a thousand flames inside you. Sungchan tasted a bit like the beer he was drinking, but also like the cherry lip balm that you had once bought for him and got him addicted to in the past. It caught you so off guard that you fell back onto your hands behind you, causing him to push deeper against you.
You were both panting when he finally pulled away.
"Y/N," he murmured lowly against your lips, "Let's go to my room."
You remembered getting up. You remembered his fingers interlacing between yours. You remembered practically running through the corridors to reach his familiar door at the end. You remembered Sungchan pressing you up against the wall inside his room and connecting his lips to your neck.
Then you don't remember anything after.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
The next time your brain registers you're awake, there's a swirling in your stomach and something rising up your throat. In the lamp-lit glow of the seemingly strange room, you peeled the duvet off your sweating form and made a bee-line straight to the bathroom.
You didn't realise how you even knew there was a bathroom behind the door you had opened until a familiar hand was pulling your hair away from your face and rubbing your back as you emptied out the contents of your guts into the toilet.
"It's okay, baby," he cooed sweetly. The term of endearment flew over your head pretty much immediately, but your heart probably skipped a quick beat.
Tears brimmed at your lashes and threatened to spill as you hurled and hurled. How much had you had to drink?
"Sungchan?" you croaked out in between heaves.
"Yeah, it's me. I'm here," he whispered into the dark, "You're in my room at the frat house."
Binge drinking wasn't a common reoccurrence of your freshman and sophomore days, but when you did, you always threw up in the middle of the night and became disorientated. You never knew where you were and how you got there.
When you finally finished throwing up, Sungchan had already tied your hair back with a tie he found on your wrist and had pulled you up against his body in the bathroom. With the lamp in his room on and the door open, you could make out his sleepy figure and messy hair in the mirror.
"Here, wash your face and brush your teeth," the toothbrush he handed you was old, but you recognised it as the one you kept in his room for the nights you would sleep over. Despite the banging headache and the questions floating around in your head, you managed to follow his instructions. There was no makeup left on your face from what you could tell, so someone must have taken a wipe to your face. You just splashed some water to refresh yourself and brushed your teeth to get the nasty taste out of your mouth.
Looking down, you were still in the skirt and college top from the party, but your socks and shoes had been replaced with fluffy socks that you loved to sleep in and all of your jewellery removed. Sungchan was waiting at the edge of his bed, eyes only half opened until you stepped back into the room again.
It looked the same as when you left, with a few pictures of you together removed in places. There were some weights in the corner too, but otherwise, it was a picture perfect reflection of before, as if time never passed.
"What happened? What am I doing here?" your throat burned from all the heaving you had been doing, but Sungchan passed you a water bottle and a pill, "All I remember was the game and you kissing me."
"We went to my room, but you passed out pretty quick," Sungchan recounted, "Sorry I kissed you. I slept on the floor, by the way."
You noticed the pillow and blanket missing from the bed. From the digital clock on Sungchan's desk, you could see it was still only 4am.
"Thanks for taking care of me. I'll catch a taxi home now," you looked around the room for your shoes, "Sorry for the vomit and stuff."
Sungchan rose to his feet, "Y/N, just stay. It's dangerous for you to leave at this time and you need to rest. It's okay. If it makes you uncomfortable, I can sleep in Eunseok's room."
Although your brain was blaring alarm signals in your mind and telling you to get out of there before anything else tragic could happen, your heart belonged to the bed that you missed sharing with him.
You sighed heavily and crawled back under the covers. With your eyes closed, you bared your true feelings into the silent room, "Please stay."
"Okay," he hummed, walking over to the other side of the bed where you assumed that he set up the pillow and blanket.
"Can you sleep with me? On the bed?" your voice was so quiet and hesitant despite your state that Sungchan didn't know if he just conjured that in his imagination until you spoke again, "Please?"
You shuffled over closer to your side of the bed closer to the door. He slid in on his side, closer to the window. Your head was spinning even lying down and you could feel yourself slipping out of consciousness already as his body heat combined with yours to wrap you up in a comfortable and familiar sensation.
"Y/N?"
"Hmm?"
"I'm lying. I'm not sorry I kissed you. I'm sorry that you had to see her kiss me though."
"Why?"
"I'd never want you to think that I want anyone else other than you."
Your awareness faded into nothingness as you felt Sungchan's hands slip in between yours under the sheets.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
"Y/N? What the fuck happened last night? Karina texted me and said some shit went down upstairs and you disappeared with Sungchan?" Minjeong's voice was laced with worry as she rushed to the door the second you stepped through.
Although she looked as haggard as you, she was much more preoccupied about where you went after she handed you your 3rd mojito of the night. You winced at her volume, "My head hurts like shit, Jeong. And my heart too."
"Jay told me what happened. Are you okay?" Heeseung's voice was quieter as you entered the open plan living space. He was sat on your couch with a bowl of cereal in the space between his crossed legs and Minjeong's iPad playing some TV show on the coffee table.
"Y/N? Hello?" Minjeong waved in your face.
"I don't want to talk about it, guys," you groaned, "Some girl kissed him. He kissed me. We went to his room. I passed out immediately and woke up throwing up. That's all."
"You didn't talk? Not this morning?" she prodded on.
It was only 11am. Your face involuntary cringed with regret.
Minjeong gasped dramatically, "Y/N, if you tell me right now that you left before he even woke up, I'm literally going to kill you. Y/N, that's such shitty behaviour. Honestly."
"Please don't make me feel worse than I already do," you sniffled as her words brought tears to your eyes, "I literally don't know what to do. All I want to do is let him go for his sake, but he keeps dragging me back to him."
She wrapped you up in a tight hug and smoothed out your hair, "Y/N, just go back to his room and tell him how you feel. Let him tell you how he feels too. You're going to keep going around in circles if you keep running from him, and it's going to end in heartbreak again."
You cried into her shoulders for a few minutes in sheer frustration, until she pushed you out of the door and made Heeseung drive you mid-bowl of cereal to the frat house to make sure you actually went inside.
On your grand exit out of the house that you prayed would go unnoticed, you had ran into Shotaro in the living room cleaning. He had given you a disappointed look, but your pleading eyes convinced him not to say anything as you slipped out of the door shortly after waking up. The expression on your face must have told him that you were sneaking away from his best friend.
It was Shotaro who opened the door for you when you knocked just 20 minutes after you left.
"You came to your senses?" Shotaro quirked an eyebrow at you as he stepped aside to let you in. You waved goodbye to Heeseung as he drove back in the direction he came in.
"I'm sorry, Taro."
"I'm not the one you should be saying that to," he sighed defeatedly, "Please don't hurt him again, Y/N. I love you both, but please."
All you could give him was a faltering smile as you ascended up to the second floor again. There were still some cups and miscellaneous items left strewn around the house, so you assumed that the frat brothers were mostly still asleep.
You tiptoed up to Sungchan's room and knocked three times, lightly, before pushing the door open. He was still curled up tightly on his side of the bed, cuddling a stuffed bear that you got him. It was exactly how you found him when you woke up again in the morning.
His face was so peaceful and angelic when he slept, soft snores escaping between his parted lips. In the past, you used to wake him up by peppering kisses on his smooth skin until he woke up. He used to wake up confused, until a smile would invade his face when he realised you were there. It used to make your heart feel all tight and warm in the best way possible.
Your breath hitched when Sungchan stirred to face his body towards you. Though his eyes stayed close, his breathing became noticeably shallower.
"You left," his voice was mercifully devoid of accusation, but it made your heart split down the middle all the same.
"I'm so sorry," it was pathetic, but that was all you could bring yourself to say.
Unwrapping his arm out from the tangle with his stuffed plushie, he patted the empty space on the bed that was still a bit warm. The weight of your body dropping onto the bed caused him to scooch a bit closer to you with his eyes still firmly closed.
"Can we just stop being sorry now? You're back now with no plans to leave again, so why do you keep running away from me?"
"Sungchan," you breathed out his name, but he opened his mouth again.
"I'll prove to you that all I want is still you. There's no one else, Y/N. You hurt me a lot, but I know you didn't want to. Let's give it another go. Do it properly and call each other boyfriend and girlfriend," his lips tugged up into a soft smile.
You didn't even know when you started crying but at the sound of your sniffle, his hands came up to wipe at your cheeks.
"Why are you crying?"
"What did I do to deserve someone like you? You deserve someone better," you choked out through your hot tears.
He let out a soft laugh as his eyes finally opened slowly and met yours, "Stop asking questions and saying sorry and just accept that I want to love you, Y/N."
His words triggered a waterfall of tears to stream down your face, but he pulled you down into the bed with him and wrapped you up in his arms tightly. It felt like home again.
"I loved you, Sungchan. I did."
He brushed the hair out of your face and planted a searing kiss on your temple, "I know, Y/N. I knew. Stop crying and go back to sleep with me. It'll all be okay when we wake up. I promise, baby."
He tucked his bear into your grasp and pulled the sheets over your bodies again. His arms returned around you and he continued to press the most gentle touches of his lips on your forehead, your temples, your nose and finally onto your lips that held back choked sobs until you slipped out of consciousness.
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
"I wanna know everything you did in New York," Sungchan requested softly as he swung next to you. On the walk to your apartment from his that he accompanied you on after you both woke up, you spotted the playground equidistant between both residences empty. The two of you had spent a few nights there in the past swinging beside each other and talking, so it seemed perfect to go there again to talk- somewhere public and open.
You texted Minjeong that you were on the way back to your flat to change and freshen up and she kindly left with Heeseung as to not make the situation any more awkward or tense by having them meet in such a circumstance. Sungchan just sprawled in your bed and scrolled on his phone as you showered, changed and applied your skincare. After a night of drinking, throwing up and not moisturising after washing your face in the middle of the night, your skin had been going through it. When you plugged in your hairdryer and made him scooch over silently so you could sit on the bed, Sungchan had sat up and taken the dryer out of your grasp, motioning for you to turn around.
"Someone's watched Queen of Tears," you humoured over at him as the humming and heat began to fill the room.
"Just like the entire country," he jested back, "I guess we're a bit like them."
"Chaebols who get married and hate each other until one of them gets a seemingly incurable illness?" through the mirror at the end of your bed, you saw Sungchan roll his eyes playfully.
"Two people that find their way back to each other," he had corrected softly.
His words struck you silent, just watching him direct the dryer at your hair while thoughts swarmed in your head. You weren't sure if your neck was burning up from the dryer or from his fingers bumping against your skin every so often.
Since the two of you woke up, you could probably count on your hands how many times you'd spoken. You'd settled into this comfortable, but weighted silence knowing that sooner or later you'd probably have to properly talk to navigate the events of the night prior. You had delayed it a bit by asking to go home and change and he walked you all the way wordlessly other than suggesting to go to the park after.
When you were done getting ready, the two of you made your way to the park. This time, Sungchan had grabbed your hand firmly in his at the very first instance of your skin brushing. He was much more bold than when you had left.
"What do you want to know?" you quirked an eyebrow as he kicked off the ground to swing higher.
"If it was everything you dreamed of. If you missed home. If you made friends," he listed out, looking over at you.
You sighed and thought back. Over the past few weeks since you'd been back, everyone had asked you the same questions. For the most part, you had given the same answer to all of them robotically, but you felt like Sungchan deserved a bit more than your usual spiel.
"The city was incredible. New York was always my dream. I got to travel a little around the country too, so that was nice. It got really lonely pretty quickly, even though I made a lot of friends. It's just so busy and everyone has their own thing," you recounted slowly, "I missed home as soon as I left, but I do miss the friends I made in New York. America is very different to Seoul though."
"Did you mean what you said at the party? There was no one else?" his voice was shaky as he asked. You knew it wasn't something he took lightly.
"I wouldn't lie to you," you affirmed strongly, "I really did miss you and regretted everything the second I left. I was too ashamed to admit my mistake, so I'm sorry for hurting you unnecessarily. I don't regret going to New York, but I regret leaving you."
He stops the swing by planting his feet firmly. His eyes bore into yours as he tried to analyse your emotions.
"I grew a lot in that year apart, so I guess I should thank you for that. I learned that I should fight for what I want and I think we can be better this time around," Sungchan nodded, "And I missed you a lot. I keep saying it, but I just want you to know I never hated you or thought of you in anger while you were away."
The silence that followed must have freaked him out a little because he quickly continued.
"And about Jiyoon. Just, um, ignore her, please. I never knew she felt that way and I promise that I never acted in a way that might have conveyed that I felt the same," Sungchan blurted out with wide eyes, "I just- didn't know how to bring you up to her. We honestly didn't see each other very much; she just exaggerated."
You giggled a little at his panic and reached over the iron links to take his hand, "I trust you, Sungchan. You were free to do anything you wanted, but still, I trust you. You're allowed to have friends."
With a squeeze of his hand, Sungchan stood up and loomed over you on your swing. He tugged softly to get you up on your feet and clasped his hands around your waist when you did. Sungchan pulled you close to him, chest to chest.
Gasping, you looked around to make sure the playground was still empty, "Sungchan!"
He nuzzled his face down, close against yours with your foreheads pressed together, "You're all I could ever want. Please don't leave me again."
Your body completely melted into his as you brought your cold hands up to his warm cheeks. Bravely, you pressed a kiss to the corner of his mouth, just barely missing his lips, "I won't, Channie."
"Is it too fast to tell you I love you? I've been waiting to say it for over a year," Sungchan pulled his head back and scrunched his face up, "Does that make me too much of a loser? Being this down bad for you?"
All the tension and stress left your body; you could finally return to normal and joke with Sungchan as you giggled into his neck, "Maybe. Do you not want to be?"
"No, I love you," he chuckled along, grazing his nose against yours again before pressing his warm lips on yours.
His lips were pillowy, parting your lips and allowing him to push deeper. He was much more gentle this time than the night before, but a squeeze on your waist caused your breath to hitch and allowed him to run tongue along your bottom lip. You could feel the outpour of emotions in his kiss and how desperate he was to let you know them.
In the year without Sungchan, your heart grew fonder and fonder and you thought to yourself how you were never going to waste another minute with him.
Sungchan had been the first to pull away, looking down at you with half-lidded, passion-filled eyes, "Let's go back before some family comes and reports us to the police."
"Ha, for doing what?" you teased, hooking your fingers around his belt loops.
His eyes transformed into a glare as he stepped away from you and moved towards the exit, "Very funny, Y/N. Yours or mine?"
"Mine," you shrugged, "Minjeong's out with Heeseung and your frat brothers are all home and hungover."
Sungchan just grinned at you, swinging an arm around your shoulder and pulling you tight to his body, "I can't wait to tell everyone you're mine again."
☆⋆。𖦹°‧★
The last game of the season was the national finals. You had been nervous all week watching Sungchan leave every day for extra practice when he usually only trained once a week with the team.
With a cup of cola in one hand and a cardboard sign in the other, you fought through the crowd on the bleachers to find the available seat between some of your friends. Minjeong was already settled in her seat, scolding Seunghan and Sohee for playing with her I <3 Heeseung homemade headband.
"You made it!" Chanyoung clapped happily as you sat between him and his older cousin. On the other side of him, the rest of the boys waved at you excitedly.
"Wouldn't miss it for the world, of course!" you beamed. The whole arena was vibrating with excitement as nearly the whole student population turned up for the game. It was the final big event in the school calendar before the stress of final exams took over, so everyone was letting their hair down a little.
There was a section of supporters of the other team tucked away in the corner, but otherwise the people meshed together in a sea of your school colours. They had won the draw as to which school the game would be played at. You yourself was sporting a jersey nearly identical to the one that Sungchan would be coming out in soon. The shirt on his back fit his frame nicely, but it draped over you like a dress.
"Channie's gonna play good tonight because his lucky charm's here," Wonbin snorted teasingly, "He was shit all of last season."
"Wonbin," Eunseok hissed, but you just laughed with the long-haired boy.
"I'm really excited. I know they'll win." you waved the "GO #23" sign towards them.
You watched the field in anticipation as they ran out to erupting cheers from the supporters and watched as Sungchan searched the crowds for his group of friends as soon as they settled in a line. He waved in a small gesture, but all of you stood up and flailed your hands everywhere. You shook the sign vigorously and watched as his face contorted in awe and appreciation.
The game was absolutely nerve wracking. Your arms were interlocked and clutched tightly with Minjeong's and the two of you moved like one being standing up to shout at bad referee decisions or cheer at good tackles. Heeseung and Sungchan were playing well up front together, dominating the field so far with a few decent shots on target. Being the most dangerous on the field, the other team's defence were taking them on left, right and centre, causing your faces to be stuck in a permanent grimace for the first half.
Seunghan tried to start a cheer at half-time and that provided enough entertainment for your group when it miserably failed to notice the passage of time. In fresh shirts and refreshed motivation, your team went all out and scored 2 goals. Heeseung's celebrations towards Minjeong were sweet and had her swooning with flushed cheeks.
The other team had managed to score a goal, but in the 87th minute, Sungchan had broken away from his marker around the halfway line and poured all of his might into completing his run to the goal. The goalkeeper had a lot of time to anticipate Sungchan's goal, but his left foot was powerful enough to send the ball hurtling past the keeper's fingers and into the back of the net.
Screaming and yelling in joy, Sungchan slid in the direction of your friends and blew kisses in your direction. Beaming ear to ear, you deafened your friends with your ecstatic whoops. His teammates jumped on his body and then dragged him back to his position for the final 3 minutes.
Safe to say, they won the final.
After a celebration with medals, Prosecco and school cheers, you were waiting in the lobby just outside the changing rooms.
Sohee was talking your ear off about some game that he had started playing with Seunghan when a hand snaked around your waist and you felt the flutter of lips hovering over your neck.
"There's my girl. Hi, baby," he murmured against you. After sweating for 90 minutes, the boys definitely all had to take showers, so his hair was still slightly dripping over the jersey on your back.
"Channie, I'm so proud of you. Congratulations!" spinning around in his grip, you hooked your arms around his neck as he buried his head in yours.
"Your support meant everything to me. Thank you for the banner! I have the best girlfriend ever," he pulled back and beamed down at you, planting a peck on your expectant lips.
Despite having been officially his girlfriend for over 6 months now, the title still made your heart flutter to this day. You'd never forgive your past self from depriving yourself from having Sungchan as you had him now. Despite being the sweetest companion in your early university days, he had held himself back a little due to your hesitation.
Now that you were all in, Sungchan showered you with love, praise and support in anything you did. You tried your best to reciprocate and most days, it felt like your heart could explode every time you looked at him from how your love seemed to grow more and more every day.
He was the perfect gentleman and the perfect boyfriend. He brought you snacks whenever you had to stay late at the library and tucked you tight in his chest under the covers on the days that the world seemed to be collapsing - it never did, maybe thanks to him.
In short, adoring Sungchan became part of your daily routine. A task that you were happy to continue for the rest of your life.
"And I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world," you rested your cheek against his chest as you squeezed him tighter, "I love you, Sungchan."
His heartbeat thumped in your ear as he smoothed out your hair with his palm. The rhythm was strong and constant, as dependable as he was. You felt the love in his touch, no need for words.
Jung Sungchan was a man of his word. As long as you stayed by each other's side, everything would be okay. The world continues to spin. Your heart continues to beat for him.
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livwritesstuff · 5 months ago
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for @steddie-week day 3 | long (and a little bit of mutual pining but the kind when they're literally dating which i think is even more pathetic)
tags: modern day, famous au, actor!steve, rockstar!eddie
Eddie stayed longer than he should have. 
He was supposed to leave Chicago with the rest of the band yesterday after their show at Credit Union 1 – opening night for a year-long national tour.
Eddie didn’t leave yesterday though. Instead, he insisted on spending one last night with Steve, one last morning pretending like they would actually get up and go to that breakfast spot they like even though they both knew they’d be spending the time wrapped up together in their bed, in the home they share, refusing to disentangle themselves until they had no other choice.
No other choice meant Eddie waited so long to leave that he ended up on a flight which would get him into Ohio with barely enough time to make it to the venue in Cincinnati before showtime (and he was missing soundcheck completely – sorta shot himself in the foot with that one, in Steve's opinion, though he won’t be caught complaining).
He won’t be caught doing anything – not publicly, anyway.
Steve and Eddie’s relationship is kind of in the halfway-stage between secret and private, where Steve posts vague, faceless photos of the two of them every now and then but still deflects questions about his romantic life during interviews because – look. He and Eddie are both at weird high-points in their careers at the moment, and that means there’s a lot of eyes on them whether they like it or not. Steve had a public relationship turn sour years ago and there is no way in hell he’s letting it happen again.
Not with Eddie. Not when it counts.
There are speculations, obviously (and after Steve dropped Eddie off at O'Hare, he posted a photo of the Kiss n’ Fly sign to his IG story with the caption i hate this place :( – mostly for his own amusement at the specific way his notifications implode afterward), and they’ll probably get around to an official hard-launch someday, but for now Steve likes that they’re keeping things to themselves, especially when they don’t get to make that choice with much else.
Steve gets a just landed text from Eddie a few hours after he boarded his plane.
(Steve knew. He’d been tracking the flight).
Before he could respond, Eddie added, miss you so fn much
i miss you too, Steve texted back, and before either of them could wallow in it too much, he sent, gonna make it on time?
probably, Eddie answered. Then, getting ready in the car lol
He goes quiet after that (the getting ready, presumably), which is fine.
Steve gets it.
He’s busy too. It’s why he’s not following along on Eddie’s tour like some glorified groupie, and it’s not like the distance is anything new. On the contrary, it’s been an element of their relationship since they met at an awards show after-party four years ago. It’s more that this time around, they were supposed to only have four-and-a-half weeks together before Steve headed off on a press tour for the movie he filmed last year, but then that got pushed out a bit further, and so that four-and-a-half weeks together turned into a glorious nine, the longest Steve and Eddie’s calendars had ever been aligned without some serious planning beforehand.
He just got used to it, Steve supposes.
He got used to having Eddie around all the time, under his fingertips, under his skin. He got used to saying goodnight in person, in their bed together instead of over phone lines, got used to waking up in Eddie's arms and hearing sweet nothings whispered in his ear rather than reading the texts Eddie would leave for him to wake up to when they were apart.
He'll adjust just like he always does, and the worst part will be over tomorrow morning – that moment right between sleep and wake when Steve will realize Eddie isn’t in their bed with him.
Like it or not, the distance is their normal and they make it work (except it’s not even making it work, because it’s not like that. Any situation, any set of circumstances will work without question because it’s Eddie).
The start time for the Cincinnati show comes and goes. A few minutes into the opening act and while Steve is mindlessly flitting between Instagram and TikTok waiting for the algorithm to fill his feed with clips from the concert (ones of Eddie, preferably), his screen lights up with a call.
“Hey,” he says the second he slams his thumb on the green accept button.
“Hey,” Eddie replied, his tone nothing short of grim.
“You geared up for the show?” Steve asked.
“No,” Eddie answered, “I’m quitting.”
Steve rolled his eyes.
“Yeah, okay.”
“I need you to come tuck my pockets in,” Eddie said, and it’s a goddamn wonder Steve didn’t break down then and there, because Eddie always managed to tug his pants on in a way that made the front pockets stick out just a bit, and throughout their years together Steve had gotten into the habit of tucking them back in for him, squeezing Eddie’s hips a little when he was done and pulling him in for a kiss.
“Yeah,” Steve manages a wet laugh, “I – fuck, man, I wish I was there to tuck them in for you.”
“I want you here so bad, Steve," Eddie says, "I really, really miss you."
“I miss you too,” Steve nodded, even though miss isn't a big enough word for the homesick feeling in his chest, “Only a week until the Indy show though. And I’m coming with you for the Michigan one after.”
“Yeah,” Eddie replied, and if he sounded a little morose about it, Steve was right there with him. Sure, it’s a comfort knowing he’ll be seeing Eddie again so soon, but when those two days are over…yeah, it’s gonna be a long goddamn while until next time, because Eddie will be playing the Midwest while Steve’s press tour is mostly on the East Coast this time around, and after that he heads up into Vancouver to shoot a period drama mini-series while Eddie plays the southern half of the US, and then…well, Steve could keep going. They’re both taking a short break for the holidays, but that and the rare weekend one of them can fly out to the other is about it for the foreseeable future.
Which, yeah, Steve loves acting, loves that he gets to make a whole career out of it, and he knows that Eddie feels the same way about his music, but…the love he has for Eddie definitely edges out the rest of it – enough that he feels the distance between him like a dull, ever-present ache whenever they’re apart.
Eddie only ends their call when his manager practically has to yank the phone out of his hand and shove him onstage, and then Steve settles back into bed, back into scrolling mindlessly on his phone waiting for his finely-tuned algorithms to do their jobs.
Sure enough, it takes less than thirty minutes for Steve’s FYP to start showing him TikToks from Eddie’s show, and amidst all the hair and leather and silver chains and chunky rings and eyeliner and manic energy, Steve sees something else, something that has the hurt of missing Eddie increasing ten-fold, something that has him seriously considering taking an ax to all his contracts and his career and his livelihood and getting on the next plane to Cincinnati.
Eddie left his pockets untucked.
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soapsbaby · 2 years ago
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Silly Spicy Call of Duty headcanons
Characters: Simon "Ghost" Riley, Johnny "Soap" MacTavish, König, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra, John Price, Valeria Garza, all x reader Rating: 18+ (Minors DNI) Themes: All NSFW but very lighthearted, nothing particularly triggering but ask to tag! Word count: 750ish
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These are just silly little headcanons about them, PLEASE if you have any like these send them to me i had such a blast writing them lol!!
Ghost
Sometimes his mask slips a little and he looks goofy as hell, you have to do your best to not laugh into his face because you know he won’t let that slide.
Uses British lingo sometimes. Has called your pussy a “fanny” before. Got mad when that made you giggle.
Once got so frustrated with trying to figure out how to operate one of your vibrators that he broke it. Was very apologetic and immediately ordered you another one afterwards.
Soap
He is clumsy as hell. Every time you have tried to fuck in a position that is anywhere near athletic, something goes wrong. It’s a miracle neither of you have broken your necks trying to get it on in the shower. He will always take the fall though, protecting you with everything he has and curling himself around you even if it means he will end up bruised or bleeding.
Makes a lot of typos when sexting, never notices. Called you “baby gorilla” once (you will never let him live that down).
Gets offended when you call him “Soap” in the bedroom. You know my name, what are you calling me that for? Dummy.
König
He doesn’t usually wear his balaclava under his mask when you have sex since it gets too sweaty but since his mask is pretty loose he will sometimes have to pft-ppf-tpftt when it gets stuck in his mouth. Has almost choked on his mask before.
Gets so flustered that he will just start sputtering nonsense. Has on several occasions been so out of it that he has messed up the nicknames you use for each other. “yes show me that I am your little babygirl, wait- no, you are… I am your boy… you’re… Wait, I’m sorry”. Not a gender or kink thing, which would of course be alright with you, just him being a dummy.
Is a bit of a crier and drooler sometimes which wouldn't be a problem except for the fact that he will sometimes accidentally waterboard himself in his mask and not tell you.
Gaz
Has called you mommy once and was mortified. Neither of you have really spoken about it but sometimes you will drop little hints around him to get him flustered.
Likes when you suck him off while he is playing video games but then gets too into the game and genuinely can’t help but get annoyed when he loses because you distract him.
Cpt Price
Is oblivious to any signs that you want him. Will go into Dad story telling mode and completely ignore the effect he is having on you until you grab him by the shirt and just tell him to fuck you.
Has a sex playlist called "sensual" with just the most cliché sex songs on it possible. Can unironically have sex to "Careless Whisper" and “Let’s get it on”.
Has given you rug burn with his beard before. 0/10 very unpleasant experience (you’d do it again, though).
Alejandro
Will say things that could be interpreted as sexist in the moment and then immediately get apologetic. Who’s my good slut? I mean… If you want to be. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to… Are you okay with that? Okay. Cool.
Will fuck you in uniform because he knows you’re into that and then get distracted by things he finds in his pockets like shopping receipts. 
Doesn’t care whether or not you understand him, he will speak Spanish to you.
Rudy
Gets tormented by you with new pet names every day. mí amor, I don't know what a Zaddy is. I don’t even know if that’s a good thing.
In the beginning of your relationship he was completely oblivious to most kinks. If you ever expressed anything out of the ordinary to you, he’d raise his eyebrows in confusion and say something like “what? why would anyone want that?” but was always open to trying anything. Now he is probably even more of a deviant than you are.
Valeria
Has this roleplay thing going on where you are a traitor to her cause and she discovers it and gets to “punish” you. You find it a little silly but it gets her super riled up so you play along.
Secretly loves to bottom and to be taken care of by you but would never tell you (you know anyway). Thinks she is being very good at hiding it (she is not).
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