#< prev i just saw this after writing that. great minds think alike

[accidentalblaseballreference]

this is on megan ito's grave stone

req'd by @rubyrevenger

welp unfortunate.

can we loot the body?

text: ohh he sploded

[mizumelona]

set me up | atsumu x reader

SYNOPSIS: You’re an ambitious career woman, who’s got everything…except a significant other. Your mom, sick of you showing up to family functions alone, sets you up on a series of (terrible) blind dates. You make these dates meet you at your favorite restaurant, Onigiri Miya, but for some reason the owner’s jerk of a twin brother always happens to be there exactly when things crash and burn.

NOTE: Did I stay up too late writing this? Possibly. Was it worth it? Yes. This final arc was loosely inspired by some hc’s I requested from lin at @sugardaddykenma​, so this chapter and the next are dedicated to her. ily haha.

MASTERLIST

PREV | IS THIS A DATE? | NEXT

TAGLIST: @awkwardali6106​ @kasandrafaye​ @veggytaled​ @svtbitch​ @stinkyobeymerat​ @hollypastl​ @differentballooncollection​ @o51oc​ @sunboikyo00 @justxanotherxshipper​ @kaisemieita @rizamendoza808 @tomo-uwu​ @sugardaddykenma​ @celinafeng @ravioliplease​ @thatpersonwithissues​ @humanbobjeanpants​ @suteorra​ @jh-bee​

~

Outside Sendai Stadium. FRIDAY 9:05PM

Unlike her prickly personality, [y/n]’s hand was warm. Atsumu’s foul mood from losing the game had already blown over, but he didn’t feel like letting go and she hadn’t shaken him off either. Either she was really an airhead and hadn’t noticed or more likely she knew and didn’t mind. He brought his free hand up to his face to cover his smile.

He thought back to her failed dates. Knowing her personality, it wasn’t surprising that she was struggling in the romance department. This girl had the kinda ego that made an average guy retreat. But Atsumu Miya wasn’t an average guy. He admired the way she was hot-headed and shameless, and he’d be lying if he said the way she confidently took shots at him didn’t stir up some kind of feeling.

Atsumu chuckled.

“What’re you laughing at?”, she turned to him with that cute teasing look that suited her far more than any demure smile.

“Nothin’”

~

You looked up at Atsumu confused. He’d started laughing to himself out of the blue. What a weirdo.

Atsumu’s stomach rumbled.

You snickered. “Haven’t eaten yet?”

“Nah. Eatin’ before games doesn’t really work for me.”

You nodded in response. “Want to grab some food then?”

“Yeah. I’m starvin’. I know a really good curry restaurant near here. Wanna go?”

“Sounds good. Don’t tell Osamu, but I’m getting a little tired of onigiri.”

“Hah. No promises sweetheart.”

“Jeez. Can’t count on you for anything can I?”

“Well if you’re askin’ I guess I could make an exception. Oh, it’s this way.” Atsumu pulled you in the opposite direction you were headed down a sidewalk path that was warmly lit by street lamps. His grip was still firm in yours.

“Ah here it is”, Atsumu stopped in front of a little shop with a warm aroma wafting out through the open front door. You two walked in and found an open table. The waiter stopped by to take your orders before disappearing into the kitchen.

Suddenly, something occurred to you. Wasn’t this kind of like…a date? Your face got warm thinking about it.

Soon the waiter returned with two plates of steaming katsu curry. Atsumu must’ve been starving because he quickly shoveled down spoonful after spoonful without stopping to talk. So this is the post-game appetite of a pro-athlete. Lol, date my ass.

“Ahh, that was great”, he said as he scraped the last of the curry off the plate. He gulped down the last of his water and let out a satisfied sigh, before leaning on his hand and looking at you. “So, what d’ya wanna do sweetheart?”

“Mm?” You hummed mid-spoonful of curry.

“You seemed pretty confident when you called me out earlier. What didja have in mind?”, He had his signature devious look. So troublesome.

You gulped your food down. “You already look like you’re in a good mood to me.”

“You don’t know that.” He crossed his arms and put on a faux melancholy look. “C’mon I can tell you and I are alike when it comes to this kinda thing. A plateful of curry isn’t enough to live down our losses”

You scoffed. “Our losses?”

“Plus we’re already here. Might as well do something.”

He had a point.

“Well…what do you like to do to blow off steam?”

“Eat.”

You resisted the urge to roll your eyes.

“We just did that.”

“Play volleyball”

“Aren’t you tired of that for tonight?”

“No. Not at all”, His answer was matter-of-fact, like it was obvious. “I don’t think I could ever get sick of it.” He smiled. It was reminiscent of that childish grin he had when you saw him serve earlier.

You couldn’t help but smile back. “You must love it huh?”

“Nothin’ I love more.” His eyes were glimmering. His passion was almost tangible. You were taken aback.

“…I really respect that.” You shared your honest thoughts. Atsumu’s eyes went wide. He ruffled his hair.

“Woah. Two compliments from you? In one night? That’s unbelievable.”

“Hah.” You sighed. “I’m serious though. Having a passion. Madly chasing after it. That’s cool.”

“I dunno why you sound so amazed. Aren’t we the same when it comes to this kinda thing?”

You raised your eyebrows. “What makes you say that?”

He scoffed. “You’re tryna convince me that the workaholic chick that stays up all night designing shit and wins awards for her apps isn’t crazy passionate about what she does?”

It was your turn to be surprised. You’d been so fixated on how badly your love life had been going lately that you’d been letting it get to your confidence. But he was right. At the end of the day, you were one hardworking, passionate, badass bitch. You couldn’t hide your grin.

“Oh? Weak to compliments huh?”, He interrupted your thoughts.

“Shut up. I just didn’t expect to hear that from you”

The waiter came back with the check, which you and Atsumu split evenly. You both gathered your belongings and walked out the door.

“Wait a second”, Atsumu turned to you. “We never actually decided what we wanted to do.”

“Oh right”, You both stood awkwardly. You didn’t want to go home just yet, but you didn’t know what to do. You glanced around for ideas and spotted the glow of a vending machine in the distance. “Wanna grab a drink from the vending machine over there while we decide?”

“Sure.”, Atsumu said with a shrug. You both walked over to the vending machine and paused looking at the options. You spotted your favorite drink then started rummaging around in your bag looking for change.

“I can cover it”, Atsumu said and reached into his bag and pulled out a chubby froggy coin purse. It was surprisingly cute. He opened it up. “Whatcha want?”

“That’s a real cute coin purse. Not something that I’d expect you to have”

“Oh this?”, He held it up. “It was a birthday present from my granny”

“And you still carry it around? That’s even more cute.”

He rolled his eyes. “Ya gettin’ anythin’?”

“I’ll get a peach juice”

“One peach juice comin’ right up.” He dropped some coins into the machine and pressed two buttons. Your drinks fell down the chute with a clunk. He handed yours to you. You plopped down on a nearby bench and opened your drink with a satisfying pop. Atsumu sat down to join you.

You both sipped your drinks in silence, just looking out at the street. A few weeks ago, you never would’ve thought you’d be sitting here with Atsumu. You recalled the way you’d clashed at your first meeting, the spilled juice and the sweater on your second date, and the way he’d stuck around with you in the restaurant yesterday. You hadn’t known him for all that long, but somehow he was comfortable to be around. It was like you could be your greediest, nastiest, most shameless self and he wouldn’t look at you weird for it. Knowing Atsumu, he’d probably throw an even more shameless, petty comment back.

You turned to look at him. The glow of the vending machine illuminated his face, defining its contours. Again, it was like your stomach was filled with butterflies. Perhaps noticing your lingering gaze, Atsumu turned to look at you too.

“Thanks again”, A gentle smile formed on his lips. “Y’know, for coming to talk to me after the game.”

“No problem.” You shook your head. “I wasn’t lying when I said you looked cool tonight. Even if you didn’t win, I’d say you were pretty charming.”

He let out a playful chuckle. “Jeez if ya keep complimenting me like that I’m gonna fall for ya.”

You tossed your hair. “Like you aren’t already majorly crushing on me”

“How’d ya figure it out?”

You paused looking at him. He said it with his usual teasing tone, but why did he look sincere. Usually teasing him came easily, but right now you couldn’t think of any witty comeback. You tried to hit the breaks on the wave of butterflies rioting in your stomach, but couldn’t help but wonder. What if…

You had a thought. A stupid thought. A thought that you usually would’ve easily shot down. Maybe you were still sleep-deprived, maybe there was something in the curry, maybe the way he was looking at you was getting to you. You turned to Atsumu.

“Hey, Atsumu. I have a crazy idea.”

“Oh? What is it?”, he cocked his head to the side. It was absolutely unfair how handsome he looked while doing it.

You focused your last sane brain cell in trying to sound clever. “So…You’re petty. I’m petty. Wanna do something petty together?”

“Interestin’” He smirked. “What didja have in mind?”

This was a stupid idea. You couldn’t believe you were suggesting it. He was looking at you expectantly. It was too late to back out now.

“I have a family brunch with that shitty cousin I told you about next Sunday. What do you think of coming as my plus one to flex on him?”

“Oh-“

“Just for that day, could you pretend to be my boyfriend?”, You quickly clarified. 

You weren’t sure what his feelings were. You weren’t even sure about what yours were, and even if you did you weren’t about to ask him to a family brunch on your first date. You just thought that if it was with Atsumu, maybe doing something stupid and petty like this might be fun.

His initial look of shock quickly devolved into a sly grin.

“A Fake date huh? Leave it to you to come up with somethin’ like that.” He shook his head. “What’s in it for me?”

“You get a chance to be shamelessly petty without consequence. Do you need anything more than that?”

“You’re gonna have to spice up the deal sweetheart”

“Ugh I know it’s kinda crazy if you don’t want to do it nevermin-“

“Woah woah. I never said I wasn’t interested. ” He held up his hands. “Fine it’s a deal, but if you’re askin’ for my help we aren’t half assin’ it”

A devious toothy grin spread across his face. Oof. Maybe this wasn’t such a good idea after all.

“I don’t like that look”

“First of all”, He held up a finger. “I’ll drive you there.”

That’s all? You let out a sigh of relief. “That wasn’t as bad as I was expectin-“

“Second of all”, he cut you off, “all PDA is fair game”,

You scoffed. “Excuse me? It’s a family function!”

“Do ya wanna put on a convincing act or what?”

“…fine”, You mumbled. “But kisses are off-limits!”

“What! Ya hafta gimme somethin’ to work with here”

This boy was really pushing his luck. He did have a point though. You thought about it for a second.

“Fine. Forehead and cheek kisses are okay” You yielded. “I’m not compromising beyond that though.”

“Okay that works, but if you wanna have a lil more of this just lemme know sweetheart”, he said with a wink.

“Keep dreaming lemon boy”, You stuck out your tongue. Atsumu frowned at the nickname.

“Again with the nicknames…actually, speakin’ of nicknames don’t ya think we should have some cute pet names for each other”

“Don’t you dare call me babe”

He took up a thinking position with his hand on his chin. “Honey? Sweetie?”, he tested a few out. Something about it felt weird like you’d convince yourself it wasn’t an act if he kept calling you that. That wouldn’t be good.

“Just call me sweetheart like you usually do”, you suggested.

“Oho has it grown on ya?”, he raised an eyebrow.

“What if it has?”

Atsumu’s witty comeback was stopped in its tracks. A pink haze appeared across his cheeks.

“Jeez what’s with you today?”, he said with a chuckle.

“You started it first.” You replied. “Also you aren’t the only one with ideas for this thing. I’m the one who’s had to put up with this shit for who knows how many years now.” Your mouth twisted into a sly smile.

“You sure can be scary sometimes sweetheart…I like it. So what are ya thinking?”

“So I here’s the plan…”

~

You two spent a solid hour talking through your plan before Atsumu finally drove you home. As you gathered your things to walk into the apartment complex, Atsumu turned to you.

“Hey. Today was a lotta fun. Let’s do it again sometime. Except next time I won’t lose.”

“Okay. Okay. Thanks again for the ride. See you later.”

You went upstairs and started your bedtime routine. Your phone buzzed as you got into bed. You picked it up and smiled as you saw the message.

Lemon Boy:

Did you make it up safely?

Shameless Wench:

Yeah. Gonna go to bed now.

Lemon Boy:

Okay. Good night y/n.

~

Your Apartment. SUNDAY 9:36AM.

Your doorbell rang.

“One second!”, you shouted, putting the finishing touches on your makeup. You ran over and pulled the door open. Atsumu leaned on the doorframe with a smirk.

“Let’s do this thing sweetheart”

[ghostsray]

Ch4: Science

(...i swear, this chapter did not go how i planned it at all.)

(first - prev - next)

Danny was panting when he entered the school building. He had arrived in time despite the ghost he encountered on the way. As he leaned over on his knees to catch his breath, Sam walked over nonchalantly and handed him a filled worksheet. "I did your biology homework for you," she explained. "You're welcome."

Danny blinked. "We had biology homework?"

Sam rolled her eyes and said, "What would you do without me?"

"Fail school, for sure," Danny said and gratefully accepted the paper from her.

A girl passing by them suddenly paused and came over. Danny recognized her from a few of his classes, though he didn't remember her name. "Danny--" (He might not know everyone's names, but everyone knew his name; it was kind of hard not to recognize him with the Fentons' reputation)--"I didn't know you had a brother!" she said.

Danny furrowed his brows and said, "Brother? What brother?"

"That freshman who looks exactly like you," she responded, glancing between him and Sam with knit eyebrows. "Are you not related?"

Sam and Danny met each other's eyes. No doubt, the same thought was running through their heads: a fourteen-year-old boy who looked exactly like Danny? Sure, it could be a coincidence, but it was more likely to be Danny's oh-so-beloved clone, Niel.

Danny frowned at his classmate and asked, "Where is he?"

She pointed down the hallway, still confused, and Danny moved in the direction of her finger before she could ask any more questions. It didn't take him long before he spotted the freshman she had been referring to, standing alone by a locker.

Niel looked nervous. As much as the idea of being around other kids was appealing to him, the reality was a bit overwhelming. There were all these students milling about who didn't speak to him and whom he didn't know how to engage with. More than a few were staring at him and whispering to each other, which Niel found pretty rude, considering he was right there.

He perked up when he saw Danny approach him. Finally, someone he knew! Niel turned away from his new locker and greeted Danny with outstretched arms and an exclamation of, "Danny!"

Danny did not reciprocate his friendliness. Instead, he crossed his arms and demanded, "What are you doing in my school?"

Niel dropped his arms (a little disappointed) and replied, "Learning, supposedly."

Danny raised his eyebrows. "You mean you--? But I thought you were homeschooled."

"Not anymore," Niel responded with a grin. "Dad thinks being around others my age would be good for me. Er, my physical age, that is."

"That's great and all, but did it really have to be this school? No offense, but I think people would notice that you and I, you know..." he gestured between their faces and said, "look exactly the same."

"Actually," Niel said, holding up a finger, "sometimes look-alikes exist even though they aren't related at all. After all, genes are based on chance, and as the infinite monkey theorem says: if you allow a monkey to hit a typewriter at random for an infinite amount of time, eventually he will surely write out the complete works of William Shakespeare."

"The infinite mon...whuh?"

"All I'm saying is, it's scientifically proven that there's a one in 135 chance of someone having a perfect genetic double who isn't a twin--or a clone. It's rare, but not impossible."

Danny scratched his head. "You seem well researched on the subject."

Niel smiled and said, "Of course! I love knowing stuff."

"Wonderful," Danny muttered. "I bet you'll fit in just great with the nerd table."

"Nerd table?" Niel asked, sounding genuinely interested. Danny could already picture it in his mind: his double sitting with Mikey and Lester and the other nerds, standing out among their high pants and round glasses with his punk hair and luxurious clothes.

Danny wanted to stay and verbally fight Niel further, but he realized there was nothing to berate him for. Niel had long ago given up on recruiting Danny in joining Vlad, and he wasn't the kind of person to cause problems in school for no reason. Sure, he could be plotting something under Vlad's orders, but Sam had promised him that she had "recruited Niel into the rebellion against the tyrannical rule of parents", so he doubted it. Niel was, simply put, here to learn.

Danny narrowed his eyes at him just in case, then grumbled, "Welcome to Casper High, I guess. Try not to cause any problems."

"Rich of you to say, but all right," Niel said. A few students nearby giggled. Danny didn't know how Niel already knew about Danny's so-called deliquent status at school, but he frowned at Niel's smirk before turning away with the intent to go to class.

He paused mid-step when he caught Wes watching them intently. Oh, boy. Wes. That guy must be having a field trip--an exact double of Danny suddenly appearing at school? No doubt he was already formulating theories in his head about Niel's existence.

Danny and Wes caught each other's eyes. Danny smirked and made his eyes glow for just a split second. Wes scowled.

"You seem well acquainted with the new kid," Wes spoke with narrowed eyes. "He's not just a look-alike, is he?"

Danny shrugged and said, "The truth doesn't matter, especially since nobody will believe you either way."

"You're dead to me," Wes growled.

"Don't you mean I'm dead in general?"

Danny's grin was shit-eating as he walked past Wes like he wasn't there.

Wes glared at Danny's back before returning his attention to where Niel stood, but the other boy was already gone too. The bell rang to signify the start of class. Wes balled his hands into fists and muttered, "I will find you out, clone."

"Really, Wes?" someone said, and he turned around to find that Star still hadn't left the hallway yet.

"Oh, come on!" He gestured wildly and said, "Surely you must have noticed that they look exactly the same!"

"They have different hair. And eyes."

"Hair can be styled, and contact lenses exist."

Star rolled her eyes and said, "You're delusional, Wes."

"I am not!" But Star ignored him and was already leaving the hallway. Wes grumbled loudly to himself before eventually sighing and shuffling to class.

.

School was pretty easy for Niel. In fact, being the son of a scientist--as well as an avid reader and Wikipedia diver--made the subjects he learned in class seem like child's play. As he and his classmates stood in the chemistry lab, the other students oohed and aahed at the rainbow display when the teacher added boric acid to a flame, but Niel wanted to scoff. He'd seen much more impressive things in his dad's lab. Hell, he was a scientific marvel himself, so to speak.

The teacher told them to replicate the experiment in pairs. Immediately, everyone else in the room quickly paired up with their partners, and Niel suddenly found himself an outcast. Danny and his friends weren't in this class; he didn't know any of the faces around him. He didn't have the half year everyone else had to get acquainted with each other, and he doubted anyone was interested in being paired with the new kid.

Niel was just about to accept the prospect of him being partnerless when a boy quietly slid into the seat next to him. Niel looked up in surprise. The boy was tall, and Niel had a feeling he would make a pretty good basketball player. He looked sort of like Danny with red hair--which was a funny thought coming from a literal clone of Danny.

The redhead turned his eyes on him. Niel was suddenly reminded of the way Dad used to look at him during his first weeks of existence outside his pod. Studying him.

"Hello," Niel said, thinking it a polite way to greet this person who chose to be his partner.

The boy just narrowed his eyes and asked, "What's your relation to Danny?"

Did this person know Danny? "His parents and my parent were college buddies," Niel answered truthfully.

"Riiight. College buddies." His eyes squinted so hard at Niel, he wondered if something might have gotten inside his safety goggles. The boy leaned toward him and said, "So you're not, say, I don't know...a clone?"

Niel's eyes widened, but he thought he hid his worry pretty well. Dad had made him promise before going to school that he would not reveal to anyone his clone status. It was a closely guarded secret, like the existence of human-ghost hybrids.

So it turned out Danny was right about people noticing the physical similarities between them. But Niel told himself not to worry yet.

"We do look sort of similar, don't we?" Niel said conversationally. "It's pretty cool, actually. Did you know there's a one in 135 chance of--"

"Cut the bull," the boy interrupted. "I searched that up on my phone just now. The chance of actually meeting your look-alike is about one in a trillion."

"Then I guess I'm the one in a trillion?" Niel said with a shrug, but sweat began to form in his palms. The boy wasn't convinced.

"Yeah, right," he said. "You're way too similar to Danny for it to be normal. Either you're some long lost twin, or you're his clone."

Alarms blared inside Niel's head. He tried to think of a valid response to save himself. Luckily, he didn't need to, because a student from the table in front of them groaned and said, "Leave the new kid alone, Wes."

The boy--Wes--looked at the girl who spoke and said, "Come on, Ashley. You had to have noticed how much he looks like Danny."

"I don't know, his hair's different," Ashley retorted, turning around in her chair to face them. "Are you sure this isn't just your Danny obsession acting up?"

Wes spluttered and shouted, "It's not an obsession!" After getting a glare from the teacher, he lowered his voice and repeated, "It's not an obsession. You're all just too blind to admit the truth that he's Phantom."

Wes knew that Danny was Phantom? Yet, apparently, nobody believed him. Ashley rolled her eyes and drawled, "Suuuure. Just because he's absent most of the time Phantom appears--"

"Not most of the time! All the time!"

Ashley's lab partner snickered and said, "Right, and I must be Batman because we've never been seen in the same room together."

Wes growled. "Nathan, you know Batman isn't real. Phantom is. And he's definitely Fenton."

"Hey, how dare you imply Batman isn't real?"

Wes grabbed at his hairs and made a whimpering sound in his throat.

Niel was starting to realize that these people will never believe Wes no matter what. A sly grin worked its way onto his face, and he said, "No, you're right. I am absolutely a clone."

Ashley and Nathan covered their mouths and giggled. Wes gave Niel a stink eye.

"You're just like your original, you know that?"

Niel shrugged.

Ashley stopped giggling to squint at Niel. A second later, she said, "Actually, hey, I see it now. You do sort of look like Fenton."

Crap. "Really? I don't see it," Niel said, then mentally kicked himself. How could he say he doesn't see it when he already admitted their similarity earlier? Really, Niel, you're starting to slip with your lies.

Nathan just shrugged and said, "Big deal. Everyone tells me that me and my brother look the same."

"Yeah, but that's because you two are related," Wes retorted. "What's Niel's excuse--apart from his extremely unlikely cover story of being a random doppelganger?"

Ashley suddenly gasped and said, "What if Niel and Danny are brothers?"

"I thought Niel is the mayor's kid," Nathan said and scratched his head.

"Of course he is, but who's the mom? Haven't you ever noticed how close Danny's parents are with Masters?"

Niel really hoped she wasn't suggesting what he thought she was suggesting. "I'm adopted," he told her.

"That's exactly what Masters would say to the media," Ashley said with a smirk. She leaned forward and said, "Come on, tell the truth. Am I right?"

"No!" Niel replied, his face burning. Of course, if his dad knew that someone even thought he, um, went to bed with Maddie, he'd be elated. But Niel was not elated. "Danny's mom doesn't even like my dad."

"But Danny's dad does, right?" Nathan said, stroking his chin. "And you do sort of look like him, minus the size."

Wes raised an eyebrow. "Okay, now you guys are just making stuff up. How do two men have birth together?"

Nathan shrugged. "They're scientists, aren't they? Maybe they, like made him in an artificial pod."

Niel silently panicked. Obviously, the idea of Vlad and Jack in a relationship was plain wrong (and a bit funny, considering how much Vlad hated Jack), but the part about the pod baby was a little too close to the truth for comfort. Also, what the heck was with them discussing his birth right in front of him?

Niel was about to find something to say to get them to abandon this conversation when Ashley suddenly exclaimed, "Oh my god!"

"What?" Nathan asked.

Ashley held silent for a few moments to increase the tension before she slowly said, "Vlad Masters is trans."

Silence. Niel was suddenly aware that several other kids in the lab had abandoned their projects to listen in on the quartet's discussion. They observed Niel, as if trying to find the similarities in him to Vlad and Jack.

Niel slowly and deliberately whispered, "What the butter biscuits?"

.

Danny stomped down the hallway with a frown. He found Sam by her locker and approached her.

"As everyone knows, I'm all for brooding, but what's with the sour mood?" Sam asked. Danny glared at her.

"You did my biology paper, but you didn't think to remind me that we had an English assignment due?"

Sam held up her hands innocently and said, "Hey, I can fill out your worksheets, but I can't write your assignments for you. Mr. Lancer is crazy good at spotting differences in writing style."

"I thought you were good at copying styles."

"Maybe, but then I started thinking about what sort of creative writing you would think of, and it bummed me out too much to do it."

"The goth girl thinks I'm too much of a bum?"

"Exactly, Danny. Your life is sad as hell."

Whatever reply Danny was about to say was interrupted when the same girl from earlier ran up to them and said, "Danny, I didn't know you had a secret half-brother!"

Danny didn't think it was possible, but he was even more confused now than he had been before. "A what now?"

"Oh, right, my bad. It's supposed to be a secret." She winked.

"Wait, what? What secret?" he called out, but the girl already left.

Niel walked over to them. For some reason, his face was buried in his hands, as if he was in too much shame to make himself seen.

"Niel," Danny began, "what the heck have you done, and why are people calling you my secret half-brother?"

Niel just slumped his head against a locker and murmured, "The doppelganger excuse didn't work."

That didn't explain much, but just then Tucker came over laughing and slapped Niel on the back. "Niel, I know we haven't spent much time together, but I love you," he said between laughs.

"Can someone please explain what's going on?" Danny demanded.

Tucker spent another minute or so laughing, but after he eventually stopped with a satisfied sigh, he grinned at Danny and said, "People are starting to write Mpreg fanfiction of your dad and Vlad."

Danny choked on his saliva and probably would have died if he had needed to breathe. Tucker's guffaws picked up again, and Niel looked like he was seriously considering phasing through the earth.