#< i'm mad enough that it's going in the main tag don't care

[salty-an-disco]

sure-fire way to make me respect you less as a person: tagging isafrin or sifloop as 'm/m'

[lost-and-ephemeral]

Could you please do LDS boys +

Caleb reacting to reader being injured/severely injured?<3

HCs: You're Injured (ft. main trio + Caleb)

Pairing: Xavier x reader, Zayne x reader, Rafayel x reader, Caleb x reader (seperate)

Tags: hurt/comfort, reader is injured but won't die

A/N: Thanks for your request! First time writing for Caleb, yay. Sorry if it isn't good enough, I'm not feeling so good since morning.

-`♡´- MASTERLIST -`♡´- 

Caleb

"Hold on, pip-squeak, I'm right here."

Your exhausted body, covered in wounds from the battle with Wanderer, was ready to collapse to the ground if Caleb hadn't caught you in time.

He knew how dangerous your job was, but that didn't make him any less worried.

You protected him but got hurt in the process.

He's frustrated and angry because there's no way he could've protected you in that situation.

And Caleb just hates this feeling, but trying to stay calm for your sake. His emotions could only make everything worse.

"Sometimes even big girls need someone else's help. Right? And I'm here for you."

Concern was written all over his face, he couldn't hide it even if he really tried. The last thing he wanted was to see you hurt, especially like this.

He was supposed to be your main protector back then. But now things have changed.

You had really grown a lot, not just physically, but mentally too.

It was just hard to accept you're no longer a little girl.

Yes, you are strong and mature. But Caleb kept holding you like you were the most fragile being in the world.

He will give you first aid as quickly as he can, while calling an ambulance. Caleb is not the kind of person who would risk your life trying to handle this situation on his own.

Definitely going to the hospital with you while holding your hand and talking to you. He'll be around as long as it takes.

Probably will fall asleep on the chair near your hospital bed.

No doubt he'll continue to look after you like he did when you both were younger.

Rafayel

"No, no, no. Don't even think about leaving me like this!"

Maybe sometimes Rafayel was overly dramatic, but he's actually afraid of losing you again.

When he saw that you were injured after not-so-pleasant encounter with Wanderers, his facade of self-confidence instantly cracked.

Rafayel started panicking and it was clear from the look on his face as he crouched beside you, seeing how you trying to cover the wound by your bloody hands.

Not again. No.

All these years he had to watch you die over and over again, losing all memories of him.

Rafayel instantly began to examine your wounds, holding you close. He didn't care if his perfectly white shirt will be covered in blood as well.

He needed to be sure you won't die this time.

And his playful attitude is gone completely.

"Don't you dare to die on me, you hear? I won't forgive you. Ever. Promise me. Promise me you won't die."

He tried to remain calm and ignore the suffocating feeling of anxiety that has been slowly rising in his chest. But he couldn't.

Will do everything to stop the bleeding while help is on it's way. You can feel his hands trembling.

He'd better die for you himself, not vice versa.

I swear, this man is gonna get the whole hospital on alert. Nurses and doctors can be mad at him as much as they want. It doesn't matter to him.

Rafayel won't rest and eat properly until you get better. He just physically can't.

"Don't scare me like this ever again, please."

Xavier

"I failed you."

You accidentaly got injured during your mission. And poor Xavier decided it was totally his fault.

You both found yourself surrounded by enemies and before he could even react, one of them attacked you, leaving a deep wound on your side.

Needless to say, in the next couple of seconds all Wanderers were completely destroyed, and Xavier was fully focused on you.

This isn't the first time you've been injured during a mission. But each time Xavier is as worried as always.

Especially when your injuries are so severe.

Will administer first aid on the spot, even the bare minimum, before carrying you to safety.

With Wanderers around, it's not going to be easy to get you out of this dangerous zone. So Xavier needs to stabilize you a little at first.

"I won't let you get hurt again. I promise."

He is already experienced in these situations, so he's able to keep his emotions under control. But that doesn't mean that deep inside he isn't worried sick about you.

Will be looking for anything to treat your wound and avoid infection.

Guilt will slowly eat him up from the inside no matter what. He had to protect you, but he failed to do so.

Even if you assure him it's just an accident, Xavier just shakes his head in response.

As soon as you can get out, he'll take you to the hospital. It is unlikely that his skills will be enough to make your wound heal properly.

Better safe than sorry.

He still has a lot of work to do, but he'll come to you whenever he has a spare minute.

Will probably act like a guilty puppy for a long time.

Zayne

"You're constantly putting yourself in danger."

Zayne has a hard time showing his feelings openly, especially when it comes to you, so it's no surprise that his display of concern felt like he was scolding you.

But in reality he's really, really worried about you every time.

He knew right away that you were in the hospital after another accident.

And as soon as Zayne had some time off between surgeries, he came to you.

Looking at you in the hospital bed, he felt his heart ache.

While he was desperately searching for a cure for your heart, you kept getting hurt again and again.

Even when you smiled, like if trying to reassure him everything's fine, Zayne only sighed and shook his head. You have no idea how hard it was to see you hurt and vulnerable like this.

He's already been informed of the severity of your wounds and how much blood you've lost.

And he could've lost you.

But Zayne can't let his emotions take over. There are still a few more difficult surgeries ahead where he cannot afford to make a mistake.

And if he starts panicking right in front of you, it's not going to speed up the healing process.

"I'd be happy if you took a more responsible approach to your health. Then I wouldn't have to be so worried."

He moved his chair closer to your bed and sat in silence for a while, squeezing your hand.

Zayne will stay around as long as his job lets him.

Don't be surprised to find candies or plushies you wanted on your nightstand.

You can ask him about these little gifts.

And watch carefully as a faint smile appears on his lips.

"Usually only children get so excited about toys. So it turns out you're not that far from being a child?"

[colorfullyminded]

TLDR

Okay I cannot believe I'm about to go off like this, but this has been bothering me for awhile, and it's only making me more spiteful. I have been enjoying the influx of Billford art lately. Amazing, great wonderful. What I have Not been enjoying, is the absolute vitriol the Billdip fans have been getting since the influx of TBOB. I was a billdip shipper for awhile. Hell I was a billdip shipper when I was a Parapines shipper-- I liked shipping Dipper with boys. I was also like 14 or 15 at the time. Obviously, if you follow me now, you'll probably notice what my main ship for Dipper is. I grew out of Billdip, and moved on to Pinescone. I have been shipping Pinescone for 10 years. However, not once did I go around saying "Lol, glad I matured and became a better person and shipped something healthier", nor did I post in the billdip tag, condeming people for a fictional ship! And saying mine was better because it was less problematic.

"I'm really glad people stopped shipping Bill and Dipper together. Bill is a 1000 year old triangle demon, and Dipper is 13--" Stop. Repeat what you just said.

"Bill is 1000 year old triangle--"

Repeat that last word to me. "....triangle?" TRIANGLE! I'm sorry what?! This ship is already completely wild enough. You're getting mad at this fictional age gap-- AND BILL IS A FUCKING SHAPE! A FUCKING SHAPE! This ship was weird from the moment GO! And Billford isn't any better. IT'S STILL A SHIP WITH A FUCKING SHAPE! And you're going to sit on your high horse and look down on the Billdip community. On top of it-- they have an age gap too! Bill is still thousands of years old or whatever-- however long it's been, who knows? And Ford was in his 20s or so when he met Bill. That's still a huge, ridiculous age gap-- that Bill could easily use and manipulate; which he did....and then also caught feelings and became a sad ex, but that's beside the point~ Both of these ships are still insane. And again, the bigger thing I think people are just ignoring about these ships--is that Bill is a TRIANGLE! THREE LINES CONNECTED TOGETHER! And this is the hill you're going to die on? ...Cause apparently it's mine. First of all-- as many people pointed out-- Ford Pines did not exist until the second half of the final season. People couldn't ship Fordbill because there wasn't any Ford to introduce.

"Well, even before Ford, I never shipped Billdip! I always disliked it." ...Okay, that's totally fine. Not everyone needs to like or agree on the same ship. Lord knows there's probably people who don't really care for Pinescone either. There's a lot of popular ships that I can't stand. But I'm don't go into a ship tag I don't like, screaming to a void for self validation. I don't go around mocking other people for ships that they had in 2014-- or even still today! It doesn't matter! I did that when I was a kid-- and then realized that was rude, and it was better to just ignore the ships I didn't like and enjoy the ones that made me happy. And grow a community of kind, like minded friends. And listen, I am all for safe spaces and being able to block things that make you uncomfortable. I am not saying people who find the BillDip ship uncomfortable to be idiots or babies or overly sensitive-- or anything like that. I think if something makes you uncomfortable, that is okay and I think it's perfectly fine to blacklist a tag that you don't want to see. I also think it's imperative that people tag things as accurately as they can so people looking at your work can know if one of your pieces has a thing that they don't like-- and therefore can avoid. What I don't appreciate is the fanhate for this ship that is sprouting up like weeds. You can not like something, you can be disgusted by it (I have my Gravity Falls ships I can not stand, nor do I feel comfortable with), but attacking real people for a FICTIONAL SHIP-- two characters who are drawings on a piece of paper and can not be affected mentally, physically or emotionally by fanwork; who still retain the same shape after everything we put them through-- to the point that you send death threats, or threaten to Doxx, or just harass relentlessly, I have always found that more childish and disgusting. You are causing real world pain to people. Me fucking up Dipper Pines is not going to do anything to him-- because he doesn't actually exist. He's a cartoon character. I could squash him and stretch him in Wonka's taffy machine--- I could throw him mock speed at a wall and watch him explode on impact-- but he still exists. He's not dead; I can pick him up and dust him off, and If I wanted-- I could decide that eh, 'Not a scratch on him'. And I'd be right. Because he is a cartoon character, and I am just a fangirl. I can not change anything about him-- I have no ability to make anything I headcanon canon. And even if I was the original artist-- it doesn't change the fact that Dipper would still be nothing more than a creation. A construct of shapes; he can not be hurt or traumatized in a way that leads to real life consequences-- because he is not real. I am not a cartoon character. My friends are not cartoon characters. Artist and Writers who stay in their lane...are not cartoon characters. If you hurt us...it will linger. It will leave a scar. If you can not tell the difference between Fiction and Reality, then I think maybe media might be too much to handle-- and I think you need to really reevaluate yourself.

And just to vent some other things that i keep seeing that are frustrating: You can't claim the twins are only 13-- and then on August 31st go "Happy 20-something Birthday Mabel and Dipper!" And then proceed to drop a picture of them as adults. Well which is it? Do they age or not? Because Gravity Falls showed them canonically aging. If you think the twins age-- then you can't suddenly turn around and go, 'no you can't ship them-- Dipper is a child!' but you drew him as an adult. So sorry, it looks like you can't draw the twins grown up anymore. You claimed they're 13, so better draw them 13 forever--. Aged up stories and works exist for a reason, especially for a fan who grew up on the series. The characters might have grown up alongside them. It's not unlikely for a person to ship Billdip when Dipper is much older.

And on that note, for people who are like 'well older billdip is fine-- it's just people shipping him during the show that deserve to die.' Okay... and like I said, this rant is coming from a recent influx of Billford shippers spitting on Billdip shippers. You know? The TOXIC Old Man Yaoi!

You're still shipping something that is problematic. You are still shipping something twisted and wrong. And I am not judging you. I am here for this divorced arc. I am thriving. But you can't just pick and choose what is and isn't okay. And let me first off explain; if there is something that personally triggers you about a toxic ship, and you want to avoid that-- again, perfectly understandable. Perfectly reasonable. You are the makers of your content space. And I am not judging anyone for that. I want people to be safe. I want people to have a good time in fandom spaces. I want people to not have to deal with the things that upset them or frighten them, or disgust them. But you can not say one is fine, and one is not. They're both bad! They're both toxic. In real life, these ships would both be charged with serious crimes! And yes, there are some crimes that are worse than others, and if you asked me what I thought was more problematic-- I'd say Billdip-- but both of these ships are extreme, and severe in their problematic content. You are still consuming problematic content. If it's a personal thing, that's fine; avoid it. But don't sit there throwing stones from your glass house.

[waywardmillennial]

watchergate & where we go from here...

To start at the end, I purchased my annual Watcher TV subscription on April 20th because I wanted to support them when it felt like so many others were not. I'm cancelling another subscription to make this work with my budget, and I'm very happy with this!

Watcher has always made high quality, entertaining content that I love, and I'm happy to support them as they try to grow like they've always wanted to so they can bring on more creators and give us more diverse art.

So, moving forward, I'm going to be posting about Watcher TV when it comes out - spoiler parties with the sexy moots! - and I'll be blocking any and all haters I see. 💜💜💜

(read more bc ofc this got long)

To walk this back and give a little history/context, *ahem* [sotto Byron voice]

April 12, 2024: Watcher announced they had a surprise coming for us in a week's time. The news came in the form of a very spirited ad-read in the Mystery Files s2 finale. And afterwards there were a few blogs posting about it, but I commented to a friend that my dash had been devoid of Watcher posts (oh, how that sweet summer child would grow to long for a day such as that).

There were some corkboard theories, and I broke down the new logo design, but nothing big happened until the following Thursday.

April 18, 2024: I saw the leak for the announcement. It was on reddit and a sock tumblr blog was made sending the link out to people. I didn't post it or share it because it wasn't my news to share. I wanted to wait to see how they were going to explain it.

Maybe I should have said at the time (but it's fine if you don't believe me now I guess) but I was hoping Watcher TV would become like their enhanced Patreon replacement, where the new shows like "Puppet History Karaoke" and "Road Files" would be exclusive, and some other perks like early access. [note: if Apollo is laughing at him right now, I'd kindly request he stuff that red ball somewhere Helios doesn't shine]

I imagined some people would be mad at the streaming news but it didn't prepare me for how bad it would get...

April 19, 2024: Most of us know what happened. The announcement was not well received. Watcher's silence right after wasn't helping, but I don't think many people were willing to give them any grace for their pre-planned trip to the UK and instead demanded answers immediately.

Do I think maybe their announcement could have been timed better? Or maybe given a different tone? Perhaps. But either way what they were trying to communicate was not what people chose to hear, and the response from many viewers was, to choose a very formal phrase here, absolute bonker banana balls insane.

The main anti-streamer "arguments" I saw basically boiled down into these categories:

"high production tv quality content is what they want to make, but we don't want that - we only want them to sit in a blank room and talk to each other with blue and yellow text like the bfu days!!"

"Steven's the one behind all this bc he's rich and greedy and only eats gold"

"they already make enough money off their patreon why are they doing this?? they should have consulted [insert other yt-er here]"

"they've become the capitalist elite that we swore to destroy! so we have to tear them down from their thrones!!"

Even now, feeling better than I have in days, I don't have the energy to say why each of those takes completely misses the point of who they are as a company, as creators, and as human beings. But there are some eloquent posts in my #watchergate tag, or my other post, if you're interested.

April 22, 2024: We got the Watcher update - giving people access to all videos after a month on the new streamer - and that seemed to placate a lot of viewers and those on the fence. But it was also the day I learned about that horrible petition against Steven, and I'd been following all this drama for several days (foregoing some self-care) and so I had a little meltdown...

Even though the new setup is closer to what I'd hoped for like 10 days ago, I hate how we arrived at it. It's shown people that they can bully creators to get them to compromise on their company. In fact, I've seen accounts celebrating this.

Opinions like this have given me trust issues when it comes to the Watcher fandom at large now. As many of my beloved mutuals have said, I'm going to be wary of accounts that follow me and be applying that blocking feature liberally.

I can also only imagine how things like this must have broken some of the trust that the Watcher crew feels for us - fightingfuries really said it best. If they do start distancing themselves on socials and things, I wouldn't really blame them.

I don't have more to say, other than I'm going to support them as much as I can, for as long as they continue to make content. I'm going to send the team a care package. And I hope in time we'll earn back their trust.

Now I'll let Ryan Bergara play me out...

As for the question of why we decided to launch our own platform, when we started Watcher in 2020, we wanted to create shows that we were proud of, that we had ownership over, and that would provide you the caliber of content that we felt you deserved. However, we were finding it harder and harder to stay relevant to advertisers and the constantly changing YouTube landscape. We faced some incredibly challenging decisions. We didn't want to compromise our content to ensure they met advertising requirements. And we definitely did not want to lay people off that have brought Watcher to life behind the scenes. And we didn't want to bring Watcher to a close, which would have happened if we stayed solely on YouTube. - An Update, April 22, 2024

[shinestarhwaa]

(RUIN MY) MAKE UP || ROWOON / KIM SEOKWOO

It's been so long since I've written for anything other than Ateez... so here's one for my other husband: Rowoon (his real name is Kim Seokwoo, so I'll be using that in the actual fic)

Genre: Smut

Pairing: Bf!Rowoon x fem reader

Word count: 1.1K

Tags/warnings: dirty language, protected sex, fingering, blow job, make up sex, marking, bigdick!Rowoon, size kink, doggy style, mild squirting

@anyamaris @a-soft-hornytiny @whatudowhennooneseesyou @star1117-archives @wooyoungmybelovedhusband @pyeonghongrie-main @dreamlesswonder86 @lemonhongjoong @woosanbby @babesindestroyland

ENJOY!

"Babe, I'm back!" Your boyfriend called out. You immediately slid down deeper on the couch, hiding in the blanket you had wrapped around yourself.

Before he went to work you two had burst out in a big fight. You haven't had the chance to work it out yet so you knew he'd force you to talk it out now. As he should, but still, you were too stubborn for your own good.

He came into the room and you noticed the stressful aura around him. You sighed deeply as his face looked apologetic. ''Baby, I'm sorry, I had to go,'' he said as he sat next to you. You couldn't help but tear up.

''You always have to go,'' you sobbed. He nodded and took you in his arms. ''I know I do, I know my job is busy... I'm sorry, baby,'' Seokwoo said as he kissed your forehead. ''I'm here now, and I'll try to be here as much as I can but...'' ''You can't always stay home, I know,'' you whispered.

''Let me make it up to you, please,'' he whispered, pressing kisses down your neck. ''You can't just make everything up with sex, Seokwoo,'' you said, closing your eyes. You wanted to stay mad at him, but there was no way you ever could.

''I'm aware,'' he mumbled, lips still attached to your neck. You moaned softly when he marked you up, claiming you as his. Seokwoo took you in his arms and lifted you up, moving to the bedroom.

He took off your top and laid you down on the bed, face diving down to lick and suck at your nipples. Your lewd noises were like music to his ears. ''I love the sounds that you make, angel,'' he whispered, making you shiver. He removed his own clothes, making you admire his tall, sculpted body. You were quick to remove your shorts and panties, spreading your legs for him.

You were embarrassed, mad 5 minutes ago and already opening your legs for him. But Seokwoo knocked that thought out of your brain soon enough. He slid 2 of his fingers in your wet core, smirking. ''Do I get you this wet with just kissing, my dove?''

You whined out as he curled and scissored his fingers inside you, hitting your favourite spots and loosening you up so you could fit his big cock in.

''O-Oh yes,'' you moaned out louder as he pushed his third finger in. His thumb flicked over your sensitive clit every now and then, making your hips jerk. ''T-That's so fucking good, yes!''

''You hear that baby?'' Seokwoo said, smirking as he slowed his fingers down. The squelching of your arousal could not be missed. It brought a blush to your cheeks. ''So fucking wet for me, every time, such a good girl.''

''Please, don't stop! Don't ever stop!'' you cried loudly, tears welling up in your eyes as Seokwoo brought his lips down to your cunt, sucking on the sensitive bundle of nerves.

''You're doing so well for me, baby, my precious, are you gonna cum for me? Gonna cum all over my fingers for me?'' he smirked. ''Y-Yes, gonna cum! Please don't stop!''

A wave of pleasure flowed over your body, your orgasm so intense you shook and shuddered in Seokwoo's embrace. He kissed you passionately, smudging your lipgloss all over your mouth. A tear fell from your eye, leaving a streak of black mascara down your cheek.

''It's okay, precious, I got you, I will take care of you, gonna fuck you so well,'' he shushed you. He kissed your head before taking a condom from the drawer. He slid it over his hard cock, stroking it a few times before entering your pussy.

He stretched you so deliciously everytime, no one has ever done it for you. He was the only one who could make you feel this amazing. You moaned out loud, arching your back as he repeatedly hit all your sweet spots. "O-oh Seokwoo, fuck me, please, fuck me," you whined. Seokwoo sped his pace up and held onto your hips tightly.

His tall, big figure towered over you, making you so much smaller. His eyes rolled back when you let out a loud cry, clenching on his dick.

"Fuck, princess, that's so good~," he moaned out. Seokwoo threw his head back out of pleasure, rocking his hips into you faster. "That's it precious, that's it, fucking take my dick, you like that baby?" "Yes! That feels so good! So good~" you whined, gripping the sheets tightly in your fists.

The way he fucked you so deep, fast but so full of passion made you melt in his embrace every time. The way his cock hit all the right places inside you no matter when or how he took you hard.

It didn't take long before you came undone on his cock, clenching around him as you whined out his name. Seokwoo halted his movements, stopping himself from coming already.

"I'm not done yet," he panted, pulling his shaft out of you. Voluntarily, you got on your hands and knees, showing off your behind. Your boyfriend smirked and ran his hands all over your ass. He moved his face closer to your body and spat on your wet pussy, coating you with saliva.

Seokwoo rubbed his cock over your pussy a few times before pushing it in again, penetrating you deeply. Soon enough you couldn't hold on any longer, sinking through your arms, letting him fuck you face-down into the sheets.

"Fuck, princess, doing so well for me, so good," he moaned out in a raspy tone. He peppered kisses all over your back as his thrusts got sloppier and sloppier, signing you he was getting really close.

"Fuck, please!" You moaned loudly, not even aware what you were begging him for. "Yes, fuck baby, g-gonna give it to you!" He moaned before thrusting a last few times and spilling inside the condom.

He slid his hand to your pussy and rubbed your clit fast and roughly, making you shudder with pleasure. Before you knew it you were squirting on his fingers and cock, shaking around him.

"Fuck, baby, so gorgeous... such a good girl," he praised you, pulling out of you and tossing the condom into the trash. He laid down and pulled you onto his chest, letting you recover from your intense orgasms.

"You're so beautiful, I love you...," he whispered, kissing your head. "I love you too... and you know, we could do this a lot more often if you'd be home." "I'll surely try, precious, I won't ruin your make-up with bad tears any longer," he smirked.

[my-rose-tinted-glasses]

Friday Ramblings

I don't normally do this but I have a couple of thoughts going on in my head regarding the last couple of days week in BL that I just wanted to collect them all instead of just doing it in tags.

Shadow

I'm pissed. I am a big fan of anything horror or supernatural themed stuff so I was really looking forward to this. (Don't even get me started of how disappointed I am at the disappearance of the other horror themed show I could be watching) And the first part did not disappoint. It was a strong first half, good set up of the different story lines and all the players and I was really excited about it. There was such good meta written about the show, and it turned out to be superior to what the show eventually gave us. (@wen-kexing-apologist specially gave us such excellent meta on this show that I wish they were in charge of the second half of this show) I agree with @lurkingshan about everything they said here. Something which I thought was interesting was that I think in this second half the show purposefully made the fake arm really obvious. I don't know if it wanted us to know before Dan but I also don't think it was an accident. But I'm also not gonna theorize about the reasons because I really don't care that much. The "BL" bait was just another thing that pissed me off. I'm not upset it's not BL, I'm upset because it was sold as such and no one will convince me otherwise. For a couple of episodes, at least, the show wanted us to think that Dan was falling for Nai. The prom moment was just fucking ridiculous. The parallels with October 6 could've been really interesting if there wasn't so much going on that it kinda took the weight of it away. One of the questions I like to ask myself when watching any media is - what is it trying to tell? Sometimes nothing and that's fine. It's pure escapism and there's absolutely nothing wrong with that. It can still be excellent. And sometimes it tries to say too much that it ends up not having a cohesive message and it all falls flat. Religion, communism, family trauma, homophobia, mental health, infidelity, teacher-student relationship, pregnancy, murder, police brutality, friendship, bullying, the oh so many supernatural elements, I could go on. You get the picture. So in conclusion, I am not happy.

VIP Only

It's cute. I like both of them enough and it's a good mellow way to start the friday madness.

Last Twilight

This show is surprising me so much. In the best ways. As I said before this pair didn't do much for me in the past but I've surrendered completely, specially to Jimmy. He was so good in this episode that I felt obligated to gif it just so I could keep watching his expressions.

That whole final scene just floored me. His eyes just carried that moment and that whole scene so well that by the end a lonely sunflower brought tears to my eyes. ( and I do not cry easy). After all the cute dates, this scene was a gut punch.

I'm just really stuck on this show, and it holds my attention all through the episode.

My Dear Gangster Oppa

This episode was silly, I couldn't care less about the gangster side of the story at the moment, I'd rather spend more time with the gamer friend group. Wahl got a bit of a redemption but I still don't like him. I liked that Guy stood his ground with Wahl and Tew, but hated the stalker behaviour. If you wanna go dude, just leave!

Sahara Sensei to Toki-kun

Japan my beloved. They just keep giving me all I need. Toki is giving me some Aoki vibes and I could not be happier. And Toki now has got two friends in his corner and I'm so happy. This one and Kinou Nani Tabeta are currently my main sources of joy and my heart is full.

Pit Babe I'd like to thank @pharawee for giving us the novel commentary because it makes it a bit less confusing while I watch this. I have no clue about omegaverse so a part of me is confused, sometimes bored, another part of me is just waiting for Jeff and Alan to be a thing and all of me is happy that Pavel is on my screen weekly.

Twins

This show is dragging and I'm officially bored. I don't mind a slow burn if the rest of the show can hold it together. But the team animosity is just tiring and annoying at this point, the side couples are not engaging ( a bj in the shower does not a side couple make) and for a show named Twins, I would like to see more of them.

Middleman's Love

I'm 99% here for the sides. They are cute, they give me some Ram/King vibes and I wanna see more of them. I was super happy to see Ngern again and the family dinner was a good moment. I don't have the patience for this sort of misunderstanding anymore so that ending annoyed the hell out of me.

(I'm watching For Him too but I have nothing nice to say, so I'll say nothing at all. And yes I know I just did that with Shadow but I was never that invested in this one)

Really looking forward to Kinou Nani Tabeta tomorrow morning and The Sign in the afternoon.

I wish all a great weekend and thanks for reading💜

(because I needed a good cry)

[stratossphere]

If you were interested in making a cheater part two I’d be all over that omg

cheater cheater pt. 2 | j.k

johnny’s got a fucking attitude again, and you’re getting really sick of it (pt. 1 here!)

warnings: smut, reader smokes, knoxville is an asshole in this one, mentions of drugs, a lot of arguing, protected sex, rough sex, hair pulling, light spanking, no happy ending

word count: 5.9k

a/n: this one has been sitting unfinished in my drafts for a long time, and i found a new love for it again and finished it :) once again, i in no way see johnny as a cheater at all, and this is just a fictional scenario!

tags: @asskickedbygirl @kristinee @lizey-thornberry @faceache111 (lmk if you want to be added!)

— —

You and Johnny were at it again. You’d been starting to slowly ease up on each other the month before, and things had even started to look up for you a little bit, but that was until he decided to stay with his stupid girlfriend while continuing to try getting in your pants at every available opportunity.

So, you were right back to fighting during almost every single interaction you had, and it wasn't like you were letting up now. You were all staying in a hotel in Rockford, Maine after getting pinched and fucked with by giant lobsters all day, and everyone had slowly made their way down to start their night of mind-numbing intoxication at the hotel bar.

"This is dumb. Why are we doing this." Ryan grumbled as you and him drank on the steps that led down to the bar despite the fact that everyone else was in an actual group playing pool just on the other side of the wall. Bam wasn't there yet, and had left to go make a drug deal after losing at rock, paper, scissors, so it was just the two of you for now.

"I told you already. PJ is really mad at me because I shouted at him on set, and he told me we'd 'talk about it later', so I'm hiding from him." You re-explained, sighing woefully as you glanced up at the NO SMOKING sign for the millionth time. You really needed a cigarette, but not bad enough to get lectured by hotel staff. You were already pushing it by technically drinking outside of the bar.

"Why the fuck do you care? All you two do is scream at each other. You love arguing." Ryan shot you a look, because he clearly wasn't having fun being away from the group, which made you thankful that he was sacrificing his night to stay with you. You shrugged.

"Because he keeps screaming in my face about everything that I do and it's annoying me." You took a long drink of your rum and coke at that thought, because one could only take so much first-come-to-mind insults about their romantic habits before they started to get a little sick of it. Ryan sighed.

"I told you I'd talk to that fucker about that. If anyone deserves to get their shit rocked right now, it's him." Ryan gave you a serious look, because you knew he definitely meant it, while you just waved him off.

"Hey. If he wants to bury his face in some blonde's fake tits and cry about how much he misses me, I'm not gonna stop him." You sighed, referencing his girlfriend, who you'd discovered was named Mandy. "I mean, she knows that we hook up sometimes. It's not like they're on the heavenly path to marriage."

"I don't know, man. Do the goods even outweigh the bads with him anymore?" And here Ryan went with his 'let's ponder your shitty situation and bad decisions' talk again like you wanted to think about any of that shit. Thankfully, at that exact moment, someone interrupted you from behind.

"What up, you fuckin' losers?" Bam was, for once, your savior in that moment as he trampled down the stairs, a lit cigarette between his lips as he almost stepped right on you getting down to the step in front of you. "Why the hell are you sitting out here?"

"Y/n’s afraid of Knoxville." Ryan said immediately, handing Bam the beer that he’d saved from the bar for him as he plopped down on the step below you. Bam groaned.

"Dude. I don't want to listen to this anymore. You two need to like, officially separate." He said impatiently, passing his lit cigarette over to you once he glanced up at the NO SMOKING sign right in front of your faces.

"That's what I s—"

"Guys! Shut up! I'm not scared of Johnny, and we are separated." You snapped, shooting both of them a look that dared them to speak another word. "I'm a fucking adult. I can make adult decisions and deal with the adult consequences without your opinions."

"You can't be completely separated if his dick's still in you." Bam tried to mutter that little tidbit quiet enough to where only Ryan heard it, but he'd always been bad at whispering. And, unfortunately for you, that was kind of funny, so you found yourself laughing at his insult.

"Alright. I'll give you that one." You caved, making both of them laugh in turn as you took a drag off of Bam's cigarette. If it was already lit, you weren’t going to waste it. "Okay. We can head down. But no instigating, and I want my weed first."

—

Yeah. That lasted about as long as you could've expected.

"Can you get the fuck out of my face? Jesus. What the fuck are you on?" Johnny started it, alright? Those words were the ones that set you off. Not you, like he always tried to tell everyone. You slowly turned in his direction, pool stick held tightly in your hand.

"It was my turn to shoot, dipshit. Get the fuck out of my face." You said through your teeth, harshly shouldering past him to get to your beer on the table behind you. Bam watched this entire encounter, snickering the whole time.

"You two are such shitheads, man. Stop ruining the fucking game." He groaned, starting to laugh again when you shoved him. He had, once again, lit a cigarette, and after about ten minutes of no one saying anything to him, you’d all followed suit, resulting in a bar filled with a stale mix of different cig brands.

"I'm gonna kick his fucking ass in a second. I'm not joking." You weren't together, so it wasn’t like you’d get a domestic violence charge. You weren’t sure if that would’ve stopped you, anyway.

"I'll put money on you if you do." Pontius interjected where he was taking his beer off of your table, chuckling as he looked between you and Johnny. You high-fived him, thankful that someone was consciously aware of the fact that you would no doubt ream Johnny's ass would things ever get as far as physical between the two of you.

"Yo! You're up, fuckface." Steve-O called from the other side of the pool table. He'd missed his shot once again, and with Johnny also missing most of his, you knew you were going to win against them. Their suckage was probably only feeding into Johnny's little temper tantrum, if you knew him at all.

"Yeah. Give me a fucking second." You set down your beer before stepping back up to the table, giving Johnny a dirty look where he was standing close to your left. And apparently he was feeling frisky tonight, because instead of just shooting a look back like you had expected, he opened his mouth.

"The hell are you lookin’ at?" He snarled loudly. You would've been fine if he would've muttered it to you in passing, because you’d said a lot worse when it was just the two of you pissed off at each other, but he was blaring your joint animosity towards each other out to the entire group, and you could tell that it was starting to piss everyone off, which in turn pissed you off.

But you ignored him, taking your shot and sinking in your ball. And then another. And then another. If you couldn't argue, you could certainly embarrass him, which was actually about ten times more effective. Steve-O groaned with every ball that went in the pocket, and then looked close to throwing his stick when you called your pocket and sunk the 8-ball in with six of their balls still left.

"You're such a dick. Stop smiling like that." He complained as you basically showboated in his face, dancing around with your pool stick held in both hands while you hummed in triumph. Whilst doing this, you accidentally brushed against Johnny, and then were promptly shouldered harshly away from him. You spun around on your heel at the fact that he had basically just fucking shoved you.

"Hey. What the fuck is up your ass?" Okay. So it might've not been very helpful to smack his shoulder close to as hard as you could, but he was really getting on your nerves. You immediately felt a hand on your arm, and you glanced back momentarily to see Bam giving you a warning look that essentially said don't start a fistfight with your ex boyfriend. You ignored him.

"Nothing." That was Johnny's response. After almost knocking you into the pool table with how hard he'd slammed his shoulder into you when you’d barely even brushed by him, apparently nothing was wrong with him. Everyone else started to rally over who was next up for the pool competition to escape the awkwardness that was standing in between you and Johnny’s fight, and you took that opportunity to scoff loudly.

"You expect me to believe that bullshit? You're acting like you're not the one that's been a fucking dick to me for the past...you known how long." There was no way in hell you were going to let him pin this whole recent situation on you and say he was acting completely normal and you were the bitchy one. Especially not when he was acting like he was. "If me being here pisses you off that much, then go fuck off somewhere else."

"You've got a real attitude for how you've been acting lately." This man was fucking insane. Sure, you’d been a little snippier with him than usual, but to give yourself some credit, it wasn't exactly fun for you to watch him shove his face in his fake-ass girlfriend's tits every time she came around your sets (which was becoming more and more often) and then come looking after you the second she had to go back home. Especially not when it was common knowledge between basically all of you that his girlfriend knew about you and him but was staying with him because she was in basically every TMZ article of the week when she was with him.

"I could say the same to you. You just fucking shoved me." You threw a hand in the air at his inability to blame himself for anything, feeling yourself reaching the level of seething as he stared back at you with mockingly carefree eyes.

"God, you never shut the fuck up when you're not having the bitch fucked out of you." It's like he had no shame. You just stared at him for a second, unable to process that he'd actually just said that about three feet away from your friends, who thankfully were no longer paying attention to you, before setting your jaw.

"Fine. You want to play that game? Go upstairs." That was a very bad idea, and the challenge you were presenting him with was definitely only going to make things worse, but you had never been one for smart decision making. And he was pissing you off way too much for you to consider just letting this slide.

"I'm not just gonna leave—"

"I'll be right behind you. Go. Upstairs." You repeated, staring him down and motioning towards the stairs with a tilt of your head. His eyes suddenly clicked with understanding of what you were insinuating, and he glanced back at the group momentarily before back at you.

You could not have described the satisfaction that filled you when he marched his happy ass right to the stairs and then up and out of view. Without a single word to you or anyone else in the group. However, they definitely noticed him leaving, and immediately turned to you for an answer.

"I figured you wouldn't want a screaming match here, so..." You explained, praying to heaven above that they didn't immediately see through your bluff. Although you weren't technically lying, because there could've very well been a screaming match waiting for you when you made it up to Johnny, Pontius, and Steve-O's hotel room. However, Preston, who was closest to you, quickly gave you a look that told you he was calling bullshit.

"You're not just going up there so no one will see you beating the shit out of each other, are you?" As soon as the words were out of his mouth, you internally sighed in relief. You were honestly much more comfortable with everyone assuming you were getting into a fistfight over having sex. Unfortunately for you, that didn't last long though, because then Ehren opened his mouth.

"No, dipshit. She's going up there to fuck him." He said it like it was obvious (which, let's be honest, it kind of was), wrinkling his nose as he spoke. You groaned.

"I'm not! Do you think I want to be anywhere near his disgusting dick after Mandy's been on it?" You made sure to sing her name sourly, because you’d made it very clear how much you didn't like her, before immediately realizing how suspicious that made you sound. You sighed. "If you're all so worried, I can bring his stupid ass back down here."

"No." Dave and Wee-man spoke at the same time, both making an identical, 'I don't want to listen to your shitty-relationship bullshit' face at your proposal. You snorted.

"Yeah. That's what I thought. So, I'll see you in about ten minutes when he starts pouting and kicks me out so he can rage in his room alone." You were definitely going to take more time than that, but they didn't need to know that. It wasn't like you and Johnny had a habit of short and sweet arguments, anyway.

With that, you turned back towards the stairs, ignoring Ryan and Bam's looks because you knew they knew better than everyone else in the group, before making your way up the stairs after Johnny.

—

Johnny had the hotel door open before you even got the chance to knock. It made you feel a little pleased with yourself knowing he had been waiting for you, but you masked that with a flaming glower as you pushed past him into the room while he closed and locked the door behind you.

You knew he didn't want to do any talking, and expected you to just lay down and open your legs, but he'd been on a different fucking level all night, and you weren’t quite done with citing your grievances.

"What is up your fucking ass today?" You snapped as soon as the door was shut, turning around and crossing your arms. He didn't look surprised that you’d brought it up, just extremely annoyed.

"I'm just not in the mood for your bullshit. You always have something to say about everything." He didn't even raise his voice which, in a way, made you even more annoyed. You raised your eyebrows, because he was one to talk, before throwing a hand in the air.

"You're the one that's got something to say every time I even breathe in a man's direction despite the fact that you have a girlfriend." You shot back, glad that he was standing so far away from you for fear of what you would do if he came any closer. "And you know what? Despite the fact that you're cheating on a girl that couldn't give less of a shit about anything but your fame with a girl that did give a shit about you, I've kept my mouth shut about all that garbage. If you want to keep fucking it up for yourself even more, go right ahead."

"You don't know anything about us. Stop sticking your nose in everyone's business." At your words about Mandy, Johnny's voice immediately shot up in volume, and you couldn't help but laugh humorlessly at the fact. It also didn't help that he was just spewing worthless bullshit that didn't even mean anything in a senseless stream.

"I don't stick my nose in anything. You shove everyone's nose in that fucking bullshit every time you bring Mandy around an hour after we just fucked in your trailer." Her name felt like poison on your tongue, and you hated yourself for how much you felt jealousy burning inside you at having to bring up his 'girlfriend'. "Do you think everyone is stupid? Do you think they don't see all of this?"

"I don't give a shit." That was his class A, well thought out retort to your calling him out on all of his garbage. He just brushed it off with a careless shrug, so you continued.

“Clearly do you, considering you won’t shut the fuck up." You hadn't come up here to fight. You’d come up here to fuck. And you were getting what you wanted.

"Sometimes I think you like fighting. You never shut your goddamn mouth long enough to stop." He was really fucking pushing it. He had a chronic habit of pushing it, but tonight he was really on a different level. Johnny Knoxville himself telling you that you never shut your mouth was gold.

"Yeah? If you're such a little fucking angel, then why don't you come shut it for me, bitch." You goaded in response, standing up off the bed and opening your arms like you were inviting in his best shot. Which, in a way, you were. His jaw clenched, and he stared at you for a second before he was kicking his shoes off messily by the door and stomping after you.

You were almost knocked back when he reached you and immediately crashed his lips onto yours, the only thing saving you being his hand that settled to hold a painfully tight grip on your hip. You weren't taken aback in the slightest, however, and you reached up to fist a hand in his hair that went just as tight, forcing his head closer as you deepened the kiss.

It wasn't long before Johnny's fingers were at the hem of your shirt, only taking a second to rip it over your head as his lips fell away from yours and down to your neck. As he kissed and sucked harshly (which you tried futilely to push him out of considering you did not want to have to explain hickeys to the rest of the crew), his hands found the button of your jeans, and he quickly fumbled it open before getting the zipper down after it.

“Do you have a condom?” You were making a few mistakes, but unprotected sex with someone who was clearly fucking someone else at the same time was not going to be one of them. He scoffed, and you knew that it was because you hadn’t had the same conversation in the past. People fuck up sometimes, alright?

“Suddenly you have fuckin’ standards about everything?” He motioned around the room, as if to reference the situation that you were currently in. You stared him down furiously as you kicked your jeans off, biting back a lot of words that would’ve absolutely ended this little session and turned it into a real fight. Instead, you settled on something a little more toned-down, yet still incredibly offensive.

“If you’re gonna stay with that stupid skank, then you’re gonna keep wearing a condom.” You really didn’t think Mandy was a skank, nor did you really have any serious ill feelings towards her (those had all been redirected towards your stupid shared piece of ass), but you knew it would rile him up. He just clenched his jaw before stepping away from you to rummage through his suitcase next to his bed, coming up with a small foil package before turning back to you. You wondered if he realized that you were winning.

As you let him come towards you before he stuck his index fingers in the waistband of your underwear and yanked them down, you glared at him and diverted his mouth away when he tried to go for your neck, instead helping him get his shirt over his head before working at his stupid KNOXVILLE belt as he kissed you again.

You knew you were making a mistake. You knew that good and well, and you absolutely knew that you were going to regret fucking him in the current mood you were both in when you were feeling a little smarter and more common-sensical later, but you’d made worse mistakes before. You would survive a little bit of shame once you were out of his hotel room.

Johnny could act like he hated you all he wanted, but nothing could cover how hard he was when he finally stepped out of his Dickies and boxers. You let a smirk play on your lips at the fact, and when you looked back up to his eyes, all he was doing was glowering down at you in response.

"Don't fucking say anything." He warned, sounding as if he was almost speaking through his teeth as he watched you slowly move to lay down on the bed in front of him with your legs coyly spread. You, however, were never one for following demands, and the first thing you did was open your mouth.

"Will you just shut the hell up and fuck me? Jesus Christ. You just keep going." That was definitely on purpose as a way to get what you wanted, and you saw that fiery look flaming up in his eyes as he moved to kneel on the still-made bed in front of you.

"Get on your hands and knees. Now." He was so easy to play. If all else failed, you could always trust that Johnny's insolent temper would always betray and overpower his common sense.

You did as he requested despite the fact that you knew it meant you’d probably be leaving the hotel room with legs that you could barely walk on, only wincing slightly when his warm hand on your back pushed you down into an almost uncomfortably-deep arch. Your face was already pressed into the mattress, and you couldn't help but feel excitement fizzling up beside your temper inside of you. That and a burning need for him to hurry up and put his cock in you.

"Suddenly you don't have anything to say. Figures." Funny, coming from him. You twisted your head enough to shoot him a venomous look, eyes full of a hatred that was teetering on the edge of being real by this point as you watched him roll on the condom. You were trying to ignore how incredibly hot he looked from the angle you were in.

"Fuck you, Knoxville." You said it with all of the sincerity you could muster; half because it was definitely what you were feeling inside and half because you knew fully well that calling him ‘Knoxville’ instead of PJ like you normally would’ve would hurt him. Or anger him, at the very least. He only chuckled sourly.

“Y’ already are, sweetheart.” He used the pet name in an equally-hateful tone, and as he spoke, he pushed into you. He didn’t give you much time to adjust, which you knew was both because he was impatient and because he was pissed, but you didn’t really give a shit either way. You obviously weren't going to let it show, but you were just as impatient as he was. You needed to blow off the steam that had been building between you lately somehow, and you weren't going to pass up an opportunity regardless of what form it presented itself in.

Although he didn’t give you time to adjust, Johnny started out thrusting shallowly into you, both hands tightly on your hips as he pulled you back on his cock.

“Go fucking faster.” You knew you were just making things worse for yourself. In fact, you knew that more than very well. But you just couldn’t help it. Tension between the two of you had been building for too long, and you were ready to let it loose in the only way you both truly know how.

Out of nowhere, a hand smacked down on your ass. Hard.

“Shut the fuck up and take what I give you.” Exactly what you fucking wanted. Despite his snapping at you, Johnny’s pace gained power then, his cock beginning to piston into you harshly with his hands back on your hips to keep you from being able to do anything besides just take it. You moaned softly, arching your back a little further just to entice him as you (secretly) relished in the sting of where his hand had smacked your ass.

Usually during these moments where you were locked away in a hotel room or in the secret privacy of someone’s guest bedroom together, Johnny was quiet. He stayed almost silent, and usually he made sure you were pretty close to the same. But now? He was grunting and groaning with every thrust of his hips, pulling higher and higher pitched moans from your lips as he angled his hips to hit that sweet spot inside of you.

“All this backtalk, and yet you’re always whining like a bitch on my cock by the end of the night.” Johnny said condescendingly when you let out a particularly loud cry, hand moving from your hip to grip your ass harshly. You knew you were going to have bruises on your hips by the time you woke up the next morning, and arousal only thrummed hotter inside of you at the thought. “Ain’t mad at me all of a sudden, or what?”

“Shut the fuck up and just do what you’re good for.” You snarled back, praying that your voice didn’t come out as shaky as your legs were. He really never knew how to shut his mouth when he really needed to. If you had been in a different position, best believe you would’ve been pulling harshly at his hair by now. Your comment did not sit well with him, apparently, because suddenly you felt a burning sting in your scalp, and then you were literally being yanked backwards by your hair until you were bent at an uncomfortable angle while still laying with your back arched for him.

“You have a real fuckin’ mouth, you know that?” Once again, Johnny’s tone had gone completely calm besides the occasional rasp due to the fact that he was still slamming into you mercilessly, and you were stuck between being deeply turned-on and a little worried for your own wellbeing. “You wanna know what I think? I think you rile me up on purpose just so that I’ll fuck you until you can’t walk. Clearly you need cock so bad that you have to act like an asshole all the time just to get it.”

You bit back a moan then, because there was no way you were giving him the satisfaction, before you steadied yourself past how good he was fucking you so that you could respond.

“All you do is beg to fuck me. If either one of us is desperate, it sure as hell isn’t me.” Sure, it was actually pretty even on the scale of who-asked-who, but you waited for inconspicuous moments. Johnny essentially tried to stick his hand down your pants every time not every person in the room was looking at the both of you.

“Not like you’re complaining.” He grunted in response, pulling a little tighter where he had a handful of your hair. Soon you were moaning again, starting to feel the effects of his pointedly targeting your g-spot as your legs lost the strength they had started out with. The slide of his cock inside of you was making your head spin, and all you could do was fist your hands tightly in the sheets as you tried to hold off for the sheer effect of making Johnny wait.

You could tell that he knew you were getting close, and just as you began to think that he was going to let your hair go to soothe the ache building in your neck, he suddenly pulled harder. You yelped just as his other hand circled around your hips before he was pulling you up, your back hitting his chest all while he continued to fuck you the entire time. His lips then brushed your neck.

“Who’s fucking you this good, dollface?” If there was anything to be said about Johnny, it was that he liked to play games. Infuriatingly shit-starting games. You learned further back against his chest, instead just moaning instead of answering him because, once again, you weren't going to give him the satisfaction. However, when his hand suddenly snaked over your hip and down before his fingers began to circle slowly over your clit, you lost a little bit of your inhibitions. And he noticed. “Answer me. Who fucks you this good?”

“Fuck, PJ. You.” You caved in a whimper, rolling your hips down on his cock along with his thrusts as his fingers quickly found purchase on your clit. The added pleasure was almost overwhelming, and you reached a hand out to press against his thigh for a false sense of stability. He chuckled breathlessly.

“That’s what I thought.” His chin rested on your shoulder as his arm stayed wrapped tightly around your hips, still holding you in place to his thrusts despite the change in position.

“I’m gonna cum. Don’t stop.” You gasped, your free hand wrapping around loosely around his wrist where he was still rubbing your clit languidly. He only groaned in your ear, hips not losing power despite the fact that you could feel him beginning to switch inside of you. He had always been able to keep it together a little better than you could.

“Cum for me. I know you want to.” He encouraged, thrusting up into you particularly hard so that his tip was hitting right against your sweet spot so directly that you let out an involuntary cry despite the fact that you were trying to control at least a little bit of the sounds that were coming out of your mouth.

Your legs shook hard as you came, your nails digging deep into his thigh where your hand was still pressed down as your back arched against his chest and your head pushed against while you moaned embarrassingly loud. You knew that you were going to replay this moment in your head over and over again a few hours later, hating how much you’d let yourself give in to his charm, but for now you couldn’t have forced yourself to focus on that thought if you’d even cared enough to try.

Johnny came soon after you, his hips stuttering as he continued to fuck you through the moans that fell from his lips while his hand tightened painfully on your hip. You felt another, post-orgasm, shoot of arousal at the sounds of his moans in your ear, and you leaned back as far as you could go against his chest as you slowly fucked through your climaxes before starting to come down.

Johnny let out a satisfied sigh, his grip on you loosening as his hand pulled away from where it had been between your legs. As your mind started to come back to you, awareness also started to come back to you, and you let out a sigh that was for a much different reason than his as you gently pulled off of him and out of his arms.

You knew he was watching you as you crawled off of the bed, and you tried to ignore it as you picked your underwear up off the floor and walked into the adjoining bathroom to clean yourself up. You could hear him get off the bed too, but you didn’t look back.

As you cleaned yourself up and wiped running mascara and eyeliner from your cheeks, you bit back the urge to get angry again; both at yourself and (more) at Johnny. It had happened, and it was probably going to happen again, so there was no use in getting worked up about it all over again.

“Are you staying?” You couldn’t see Johnny as he asked, but you could tell by the tone of his voice that he was probably feeling the same way as you were. You hoped that he was feeling at least a little bit of shame while he pictured his blonde little girlfriend back in LA. You scoffed, not caring whether or not he heard you.

“No.” You would go right back down to the bar, act like you hadn’t just gotten fucked within an inch of your life, and then ignore all the knowing stares when Johnny came down approximately two minutes after you. It had become routine by this point.

“You gonna go back down there and give Dunn and Bam a play-by-play?” There was a hint of sourness in his tone, and you chewed on the inside of your cheek at the fact. You walked back out of the bathroom once you had finished putting on your underwear, met with the sight of him laying on his bed in stark-white boxers.

“Don’t worry about it. I’m sure you’ve said worse.” You knew that he talked about the two of you’s relationship behind your back. Especially nights like these where, to him, it appeared as if he had won this unspoken fight that had been raging between the two of you for the past few months. “Take a fucking pill or something before you go back down there. You’re ruining everyone’s night.”

“If that’s what you wanna call what we just did.” He still sounded cocky, but he was also more relaxed now, reclined with his hands behind his head and his eyes barely half-open. “Same place tomorrow night?”

“Sure. Stick your head a little further up your ass and then just wait for me.” You said snidely, still chewing your cheek as you pulled on the rest of your clothes. You refrained from glaring at him like you wanted to knowing that it would only encourage him, instead avoiding looking anywhere near him at all as you finally pulled your shoes on.

He said nothing then, but you knew he was staring at you, his foot tapping repeatedly against the mattress like he was waiting for you to either say something or leave. Luckily for him, you were choosing the latter.

Then, just as you got to the door, he decided that he wasn’t done.

“Y/n.” He called your name almost as if he was scared of you, the sound of him moving on the bed causing you to look back and see that he had sat up almost straight. You took a deep breath, trying to will yourself to have some patience where it was wearing thin into almost nothing.

“What.” You were giving him 30 seconds at most. Usually, if he was using that tone, his guilt had set in, and you had no sympathy for his feelings at this time and point in your relationship anymore. No sense in helping him tuck himself into the bed that he had made.

“I’m breaking up with Mandy. When we fly back home.” Fucking Christ. It’s like he craved your reaction to every single move he made. You felt your heart twist, and you just stared at him for a long moment, trying to soothe the sea of different emotions threatening to hurl itself up into your chest.

You didn’t need him. You didn’t need him, and you didn’t want him.

“Okay.” And then you were out the door.

[fangsded]

POSSIBLE SPOILERS FOR FINAL FANTASY XIII -LIGHTNING RETURNS!!!!

I just finished Lightning Returns. Holy fuck that ending was BIZARRE but also the exact ending I wanted. I LOVED every second of the main story. I love the anti government/religion, I love the (in my eyes) hints at queerness, I LOVE the reunions, I love that they did closure for the sequel characters?? I LOVE CAIUS/YUEL/NOEL'S ENDING SMMM!!! I love literally everything about the end.

There are just a few things I don't understand:

When Lightning first goes down onto the first little bit of the cathedral, and she talks to Lumina, everything was pretty much okay until Lightning decides to make sure Vanille doesn't do the soul song. When Lightning decides to run off to do that, Lumina suddenly breaks down and begs her not to leave.. AND THEN POOFS AWAY WHEN LIGHTNING LEAVES??? Just go with Lightning, kiddo. It's not like she would've stopped Lumina if she was gonna help? Lumina seems pretty powerful too, she could've been a big help. 😭

When Lightning talks to "Cid." If Lightning could talk to the dead and hear them out better than Vanille could, why didn't they do that sooner than legit the last day to talk? Vanille could hear all of them at once and it was suffocating, but Lightning could hear one guy out that was speaking for all the dead, and actually figure out what to do. Why'd they wait till the very end to suddenly throw that bit of kinda big story at us? Lightning and Vanille could've talked it out and the whole soul song thing could've been stopped way earlier.

If Lightning lost her emotions not because of the gods, but because she shut them away when her mom passed, how come she actually had character in the first game, then suddenly she becomes helpers for God's and becomes emotionless?? Shouldn't she have been emotionless from the start if she "made herself emotionless?" She was pretty emotionless in XIII-2, and Lumina wasn't a thing, so it can't be because Lumina took the emotional part of Lightning and left her with only logic. Plus, if she genuinely couldn't feel any emotion till the very end of the game, why did she care to help Serah, or any of the others, and genuinely care when they were hurt? If she only cared about Serah, she could've saved many other souls, yet she went after people like Snow and Caius who were difficult or even impossible to save. She could've just stuck to finding oil for Bachti and small things like that. 😭😭

Remember these?

She felt genuine emotions like joy, worry, annoyance, and more but those are the pictures I have at the moment. If she lost her emotions because of herself, shouldn't it have been flipped? Where she is emotionless in the first game and grows to show her feelings by LR? She even was really shut off from everything in the very beginning and warmed up to the others enough to show emotion. But no?? more time passes and she shuts off after growing so much in game one???

This one I'm almost more mad about than Hope constantly in your ear bothering you all of LR.

If Noel cared enough about Serah to help at the very end of the game, why didn't he just help though the whole game? He wasn't doing anything after we beat him in the fight other than wandering Luxerion. He could've just tagged along. Lightning told him the goal was to save Serah before they fought and all he cared about was his Yuel, but suddenly at the very end he cares now? I could see why Sazh and Snow didn't tag along. Sazh had Dajh to spend the remainder of time with, and Snow technically had a house to rebuild even though it wasn't worth it since the end of the world was approaching, but I guess it's a better excuse than; "I only care about Yuel right now, so you can save Serah on your own."

If Lightning and Fang knew that Vanille was being manipulated a few days before the end, and Vanille regularly wanders the cathedral later in the day, and at least Lightning knows this, why didn't they just tell her? Maybe Fang knew less and didn't believe she could convince Vanille yet. But Lightning doesn't have an excuse. Lightning found out Vanille was being manipulated and why a few days before the end, and we could go up to Vanille and talk to her still. Why didn't Lightning tell her before the soul song was about to be performed??? She didn't even try at all, maybe if there was a scene where she tried and it didn't work without Fang being there for some reason then maybe the end would make more sense, but it was actually very preventable. Lightning also didn't know that Buhnavelze (or however you spell that thing,) was controlling Hope yet, so maybe Hope could've had a suspicious scene where he tells Lightning to go do something "important" before she tries to tell Vanille? That would've been great.

I also didn't understand "fake Serah" at all? Like, they said things like, "she was a fake the whole time." So that means for how long? Cause the whole time would mean she wasn't ever real including before the L'cie stuff, but I don't think they meant that? Unless they did? They mean just for after she died right? There's no way they mean to say that the whole first game journey was for a fake sister/fiance, right? The whole XIII-2 journey would've also meant nothing because the main character would've been fake, and saving her in LR would be pointless if she was fake the whole time too? So they had to have meant when she randomly appeared to attempt to toy with Lightning, right?

What happened to the fakes anyways? Tf happened to fake Serah? Did she just get cast aside bc she wasn't the real Serah? She explained that she had feelings and a soul, just not Serah's soul, which means she was a real person too. Did I blink and miss the scene where she turned into only a soul too or go into Lightning's heart or something? Cause after all the talk of doing what's right and making sure to save literally everyone except for Caius and most the Yuel's, there's no way they'd cast aside someone like that just because she isn't the actual Serah, right?

Now this one is probably gonna be excused with "they're just optional NPCs!" But I'm still gonna ask.

The fuck did they do? Did they develop mental disorders and become disabled? The side quests are SOOOO dragged out, and all they do is yap and yap. Most the quests are; "go up the hill and find the thing we've been searching for, for 500 years." Or "go find my wife's broken calculator for me that's just over there in the sand by the skeleton. My poor dumb soul can't be saved without that broken calculator." Like, really? Pretty much all the side quests are just nonsense fluff that they could very well do themselves. Why do their souls depend on Lightning doing everything, and why do they talk so much for so long and drag out everything as much as possible? AND WHY DO YOU GAIN LEVELS OFF OF THE DUMBASS FLUFF QUESTS THAT'RE SO SO PAINFUL? WHY WAS BUHNAVELZE SO HARD AFTER DOING MOSTLY ALL THE QUESTS TOO? YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT HE'S EVEN MORE DIFFICULT WITHOUT DOING ALMOST ALL QUESTS? I ALMOST HAD TO START COMPLETELY OVER ON THAT FIGHT 😰

Don't tell me about the four rooms at the end either, the fights in there were also way too hard and I couldn't do a single one. That shit is for new game+

Why is Buhnavelze so annoying? Like, he controlled Hope's body, right? Hope talked in your ear about everything and as many useless things as possible. Real Hope didn't do that. Why is Buhnavelze really damn annoying?

Despite all the flaws, I still love it and will be going rabid over it. This hyper fixation will be the most over the top so far because it's too good. I could make a bigger rant than this about why I love it, but I won't.

Please tell me about these things if you know about them though. I'd love to hear it out and learn why all these things happened the way they did.

[bcbdrums]

Given the fact that we were talking about our perceptions of certain kinds of ships in regards to Stein and how they suit or do not suit his character, how do you feel about smut/the relationship dynamics within Stein x character smut fics?

All righty then...! Here comes a very long rambling of my headcanons about Stein, his two primary relationships, and his relationship with those deeper intimacies. This takes some turns before it gets to the main point but well, I love talking about this man. Extremely long post under the cut.

Also - there are two blogs I tag at the very end of this post - you two feel free to ignore all my ramblings, just know I praise you both at the end and I still re-read your Soul Eater stories VERY regularly.

I'm truthfully still trying to reorganize my thoughts on this specific topic because 1) I have listened to many a headcanon from others on the subject and I always try to give validity to their thoughts even when they differ from mine, and 2) I've also read tons of smut fic with Stein out of sheer desperation for...well, Stein fic. (Come on Stein fandom where you at? Write me some gen fic too, lol)

I have not read too many fics of him with Marie cuz those always contain manga spoilers so I'm skipping those for now until I finish reading (exactly halfway through!). So what I've read is mostly Stein/Spirit smuts and just a couple with Marie, and I want to say….almost zero?? I think zero of those fics (and boy I've read plenty) have "hit the spot" in terms of what I would want for a Stein smut. They're good stories, in some cases great stories, well-written and thoughtfully conceived, but they're not fitting my headcanons and interpretations of who I see onscreen (and who I see in the manga so far).

All that said now… Some of my own relevant headcanons for him, and then I'll get more into fic of others.

I go back and forth toying with the idea that Stein experimented with intimacy just a little as a teen. He's not immune to puberty and hormones; he's human whether he likes it or not, which isn't to say mind over matter doesn't work for him. (Clearly it does, in staving off madness among other things.) But he's a scientist. He's curious. And I can see him justifying an experiment or two in his teen years. But they would in fact be just that, experiments. It's still a big maybe. I can't say for certain he would, it's the sort of thing like…if all the dots line up just right, he'd attempt it. If not, he wouldn't. And it would only be with those two people: Marie and/or Spirit. He doesn't trust anyone else enough. (Yes, I'm on board with the popular fanon that Marie was one of his other weapon partners after Spirit.)

Another teen headcanon... I can also easily see a sort of angsty distraction possibility for him. When he loses Spirit to Kami, I can see him getting into a "romantic" relationship with Marie as sheer distraction, and even misguided retaliation. Spirit "cheated" on him with another meister and abandoned him, so why shouldn't he do the same with another weapon? Which sucks for Marie but well she's not healthy about relationships any more than Stein or Spirit are. But this is just another sort of maybe-thought; another situation where all the dots would have to line up just right for him to go for it. But I can see it, no question, just like the prior thought.

As for Stein as an adult, at the point we see him in the show… While I think relationally he and Spirit have the most interesting dynamic to explore, the one he shows more openness toward is Marie. It's clear that he cares for her. And he doesn't fully understand that either. Now I don't think he wants to get into bed with her, or marry her, or anything traditional to a romance. But I also don't think Marie is going anywhere. Thinking post-anime now…. Unless he gives her a sign that there is nothing between them, I think she's staying put. But sadly for her, I think there is something between them... Sadly because, Stein doesn't know what it is, and it's not "love" the way that Marie wants it. It's just something he's unfamiliar with. Meanwhile she's devoted to him, poor woman.

Now, end of the anime… Let's talk about this…. Marie helps him back to sanity with her healing wavelength. But…then he's just "okay"? No he isn't. Look at that man. His dark circles are darker, his eyes are more haunted. That man has been living off madness and cigarettes for weeks. When is the last time he ate anything? Showered? Legitimately got any sleep?? How he's even standing up let alone fighting Medusa is beyond me, and then he performs freaking major surgery and then waltzes into the death room afterward like he's fine. Because...that's who Stein is.

Stein will fight until he is incapable of fighting anymore, to serve those he loves. Yes I said loves. And it is agonizing how much he strives to show his love for others, and it's something he doesn't even realize he has within him. He thinks he can't understand love? It's because he feels it so deeply and passionately it's beyond definition. Part of this however I'm also certain is motivated from his deep desire for purpose as an adult. The manga shows that aspect of his character even more-so than the anime (in what I've read so far). That man is desperate for purpose and to belong somewhere, with someone. He can't escape his human nature even if he doesn't understand it, can't define it, and even though it drives him crazy all on its own…

So bringing this back to Marie… End of the anime. I don't think Marie is leaving. She's gonna stay, help nurse Stein back to health and sanity despite his pretending he's fine (or perhaps even sheer ignorance of his condition), and Stein…is gonna be confused the whole dang time about his feelings for Marie. He knows he feels something but he has no idea what it is or how to process it. But "love" in the romantic sense he doesn't possibly consider, because well...his conceptions of that sort of thing aren't based in anything healthy (see: Spirit's relationships).

So yeah… She's not leaving. He won't reject her attentions because he does care about her, just not in a way he understands and also not in the way she wants. And as she starts to realize that he has some kind of feeling for her, I think she'd turn up the romance and she'd make a move on him. OR…she'd play the extremely...long...patient game, and wait for him to make a move on her, when it's within his comfort zone. And let me be clear… This man still does not know what love is in this traditional sense, does not understand love. He knows what physical attraction and hormones are and darn him he can't shake those either, but as an adult he wouldn't act impulsively on them nor would he confuse them with love. Stein is the ultimate master of mind over matter. If he were to sleep with her, it would be a choice; a decision he makes consciously and deliberately. I see this within the realms of possibility. But if he chooses it himself, if he's the one who makes that decision simply out of his wanting to…it would be a long, long time that that woman is waiting for him. But I do think it possible. The question is simply, how long will she wait. And she's also the type to try to stir things up (see: her behavior toward Joe in the manga). So who knows when they may end up in bed together... These dots are more complicated to align than those of his teenage years. And if Marie made the move first...I think he'd accept it. Because, see again, his wanting to belong with someone, and he knows he feels something different with Marie.

As for Spirit, well... Stein sees that Spirit likes women. And Stein sees that Spirit can't commit. I think Stein "loves" Spirit more than he loves Marie. First love, young love... Spirit is the relationship of his life, even though that's yet another thing he cannot possibly understand. I think that while part of him, the mad obsessive part, and the curious part, does want to be close to Spirit in the intimate way…it's not out of a healthy desire or even typical motivations. It would come from a desire to possess, from his deeply human but inexplicable yearning to be closer to the one he loves even though it's not the right type of love for that type of intimacy. Not really sure Spirit would be all-in if Stein were to make the move... I think Spirit would take persuading. It's another circumstance where all the dots have to line up just right, and in this case probably more while caught up in madness than in sanity. Because as previously mentioned… In his right mind, Stein knows that Spirit likes women and more importantly that Spirit cannot commit. And he's ironically smart enough to know not to attempt a traditional human romance with someone who cannot commit. I don't think Stein would himself attempt intimacy with Spirit in his right mind at all, unless something happened to make him utterly desperate not to lose the man... Another instance of, all those dots have to connect.

But ugh, the angst. Spirit abandoned him after five years... Stein is not going to willingly subject himself to possible heartbreak again. Plus, he does not think Spirit has forgiven him for the "experiments." I think he thinks Spirit only hangs around him now as an adult as his handler, despite desperately wanting his friendship again. But I think he figures it's a lost cause so he just takes what is offered and never pursues more.

Okay but before I digress further into my endless thoughts about Stein's and Spirit's relationship (I'll do another post for that maybe), back to the point of your question.

I am really not one for labels, partially because I don't understand them but also because I think the spectrum is just so deep and too much defies definition. But if I were to label him, I guess I'd go with...gray ace with demi leanings…?

The man is driven only by curiosity, about anything and everything. But the level of intimacy we're talking about is more than he ever wants to trust anyone with. It's always gotta be on his terms, and more often than not…his terms would be unhealthy.

So let's talk about what shows up in fanfic, since that was what the original question was about. And once again, I like to lend validity to everyone's interpretation. Just because it isn't mine doesn't mean it's wrong or shouldn't exist. But you did ask about MY thoughts, so that's what I'm sharing here.

Once again, I've barely touched Stein/Marie fic because I'm avoiding manga spoilers. In the one or two I've seen, he comes across as not connecting emotionally in the typical way, but knowing that there is indeed something different about being with her. He knows she cares about him, and he cares in return. But it doesn't come across as anything intimate on his side of it. This isn't a characterization I particularly like, because Stein as an adult... As I said, I think he'd choose that intimacy if and when he wants it. In the stories, it comes across more as him just doing her a favor, just going along. It doesn't sit right. But like I said, that's only two stories. For other Stein/Marie, I reserve opinion for later.

Stein/Spirit... Okay. I've noticed a great many commonalities in the fics I've read. And this isn't a taste or preference thing; like I said I have devoured almost every smut fic just in desperation for any fanfic of them. Would prefer more gen fic less smut personally, but anyway.

Most fics have Stein in the dominant role, Spirit in the submissive role. I understand that interpretation but it's not how I see them. I see them as equals if they were to get into that type of intimacy. There is often a lot of bloodplay, frequently madness on Stein's part, major instances of non-con, pet play, BDSM, sometimes light cannibalism... It all suggests an impersonal and unhealthy relationship most of the time, which again...is not at all how I see them if they were to become a couple. Could such things come about? Unhealthily, possibly. But darn me and my desire for happy endings.

These two men are so broken, that if they were to become a healthy couple...I feel like it would be slow, cautious...extremely hesitant. There is extreme distrust on both sides, and also misconceptions about how the other feels. Which...I will save that analysis for later. Focusing back on smut fic.

I have seen only a few that touch on the give and take in a trusting relationship (all by the same author) that come closest to what I feel is accurate to the characters onscreen as I see them, but still the emphasis is too much on lust. It still isn't hitting the spot for me due to a lack of that relational development... Make no mistake, the stories are great, but I personally am hoping for something much deeper.

In my view, Stein just does not seek out physical intimacy in that way. I don't think he can fully escape the innate human need for touch, but in terms of a drive to get into bed with anyone... I think the occasional human desire for it crops up, and he easily ignores it/packs it away because it's not useful to him. It doesn't bother him. He doesn't think about it.

So this is where that...gray-ace, demi vibe comes into play for my view of him. Talking about Stein here as an adult and in control of himself, not consumed by madness... This is I supposed a bit of a summation of my thoughts.

If he did get into a relationship with anyone (and again I think his only choices are Spirit and Marie), it would not be based on the physical at all. I also don't think he would rush into any relationship. It would be a long process before he trusted the person enough to consider them a romantic partner. And really, we could get away from the word romance entirely... Life-partner is a better word, in Stein's case. If the person wanted physical intimacies, I think he would be responsive to that. The other person would be in the lead, but in no way dominating. It would have to be an equal trust thing or else Stein would nope out hard. Stein would gradually learn what it is he likes physically, and how to give his partner what they want. He can come to enjoy it because this is his life-partner, the one he belongs with, the one who needs him and is part of his purpose. But again...the physical is not something that drives him at all. Not in how I see him portrayed onscreen or in the manga.

So, overall, in my point of view nearly all smut fics miss the mark. Now...the stories I've seen where I think the physical intimacy is nailed don't even get to smut. Those are the stories by @asymmetryestablished (AO3 NothingSoDivine) and their characterizations of Stein and Spirit defy description in any words I have. The other author who nails it is @wispforever (same on AO3) and the closest to physical intimacy they get is dancing, but my gosh still the characterizations are utter perfection. I will be re-reading y'all's Stein/Spirit stories forever.

I hope I did in fact answer your question, but overall, I was delighted to just spill out so many of my thoughts about Stein even if in summary form. Yes this was a summary... Okay. I'm done. Thanks.

[amethystina]

Dear Amethystina,

How could you do this to me????? I think I'm going to perish. PERISH. You posted about Mad Dog and twinky Woo Do Hwan and??? How could I not watch it???? And now I've just finished episode 12.

And let me tell you. I have suffered. The PAIN of watching Jang Ha Ri (who I really want to like, mind you) and Kim Min Joon doing their stupid flirty thing. Maybe it's because I haven't finished the drama, but I feel like Ha Ri is being done dirty. And without even mentioning the surprisingly homoerotic bromance of said Kim Min Joon and Choi Kang Woo.

Since you are the reason I started watching Mad Dog in the 1st place (curse my similar taste), I'm ranting to you. I know you have no particular obligation to reply. :) But these are my thoughts, and I must tell them to someone because I don't know anyone else who watches this drama, and the tumblr tag for it is a vacuum. Let the rant commence.

How could the writers do this to Jang Ha Ri's character?? Maybe it's just bc I haven't gotten to that part yet, but she barely got any backstory, and I'm 3/4 of the way through this drama. Just a couple lines abt her father being saved by Kang Woo. And that's it. That's it! Even Cheetah got a friggin flashback. Even though he's a less significant character. (Pardon me, Cheetah, but it's true.) Since she has no backstory, her character feels rather ungrounded. We, the audience, don't really know who she is w/o the two main leads. With every other character, we know who they are on their own, because they got a rather thorough backstory.

But Jang Ha Ri has barely any, which I think is strange, since she's pretty important. Therefore, whenever I see her on screen, I just can't connect with her. In the beginning of the drama, I was like "wow, this is such a good setup for her character! i can't wait to see what the writers do with her". But now I'm 3/4 of the way through this drama, and she's got almost nothing. That causes me to feel like she's been shortchanged, and that her relationship with the other characters (especially Min Joon) is built on a foundation of sand. They told us abt her background, but they didn't show it, which kinda invalidates her relationships w/ other characters, because she's barely a character by herself. That's not to say that she doesn't have personality, but we don't understand her on her own, we can only access her thoughts when she's with the two male leads, or doing smth for them, etc.

She can't have a romantic relationship with someone else if the audience doesn't know who she is on her own. (Kinda like how, in real life, you have to know who you are and love yourself before you can love someone else.) That's why her and Min Joon's relationship feels so insincere, because in it she's basically just Min Joon's love interest. As you can tell, I'm a lil salty.

And on top of all that, Min Joon and Kang Woo have such promise as a couple!!!!! Kang Woo choked Min Joon up against a wall. (parallels to the Devil Judge) They were living together. For God's sake, Min Joon cooked Kang Woo a thank-you meal for caring enough about him to check on him when he was in trouble, for saving his life. How Min Joon looked so crushed when Kang Woo told him they weren't living together! And I can't even read any fanfics about it, since there's literally only 3 fanfics for their pairing on ao3! And none of them are written the way I think the characters should be written. So I may have to write a fanfic for them myself, since I need them to kiss.

For my ask, I request a few words of comfort involving Min Joon and Kang Woo. I would ask for a short lil drabble where they're happy together, but if that isn't smth you want to do, just pretend I never asked. Just say "They kissed and lived happily ever after. The end." Those words from you would bring me great happiness in my time of sorrow.

Ever your faithful reader,

Sofapup

(P.S. And btw 39 of WHTD was heartwrenching and I loved it sm and I cried why do you do this to me)

I'm sorry this took a little longer to answer than usual but when I got this ask, you were actually ahead of me in the drama since I've been putting it off for so long x'D So I had to wait until I had also finished episode 12, just in case there was some important information there that might influence my reply.

Also, I want to point out that I never actually told anyone to watch Mad Dog since I still haven't finished it myself. So you only have yourself to blame, my friend ;)

ANYHOW. Your feelings about Ha Ri mirror my own. She is done SO dirty. I was SO EXCITED when she first showed up because it seemed like she was going to be a really interesting character, but, pretty soon, I realised how wrong I was. I agree that they've given her almost no backstory whatsoever and so nothing she says or does feels truly anchored in anything. And she fluctuates wildly between confident badass and flustered damsel in distress in a way that's genuinely baffling to me.

Like, in episode 12 when she got chased into a dead-end by the baddie and everyone was freaking out — including her. But, like, my dudes. Did you all forget how she literally parkoured her way down a three-story building in episode 1? Her ability to climb and acrobat her way out of trouble has been firmly established. But now she can't even climb the pile of rubble in front of the one-story house she's caught next to? What the actual fuck is going on?

I am FURIOUS on her behalf.

And that is actually one of the reasons why I'm having trouble getting through this drama. That and the general inconsistent characterisation (not just Ha Ri), plus the shoehorned flirting. The general plot and setup of the drama are fine and I like quite a lot the characters and their relationships, but it's also forcing a lot of confusing and contradicting information in my face in a way that instantly makes my hackles rise. It feels almost clumsily unprofessional?

Like, don't get me wrong — I'm still enjoying most of this drama and I'm pretty sure I'll finish it — but dear LORD is the characterisation bad in some cases. At this point, I think I can say I'm pretty good at characters without that being taken as bragging, yeah? I have a pretty easy time pinning down their personalities, behaviour etc. etc. And when I can't it's usually a bad sign because, nine times out of ten, that means your characters are inconsistent. Either because the writer doesn't have a clear picture of who they are, or because they keep making the characters do things they usually wouldn't because they want to advance the plot (poor Ha Ri suffers from both, I'm afraid to say).

That's not to say that a character has to be predictable. Kang Yo Han is a good example of a character who was unpredictable enough that I couldn't say for sure I understood him until I had watched the whole thing. I needed all the information before I could form a clear picture. But, even then, he was consistent in his characterisation throughout the entire drama. To be honest, he's one of the most consistent characters I've ever seen, especially since, even on a rewatch, his actions don't change. You understand his motivations better, sure, but his actions are exactly the same and that, right there, is something I am in awe of. Even the impulsivity, recklessness, viciousness, sudden swings in direction — all of it was consistent in the end because his core personality and values were. Kang Yo Han is a marvellous character from a craft perspective.

But in Mad Dog? Shit's all over the place for the majority of the characters. The most solid ones are the bad guys since their core personality trait is "hilariously evil." Which might not be a very nuanced personality, but at least it's consistent. Almost everyone else has been forced to be out of character for convenient plot purposes at some point.

And the worst crimes by far are committed against Ha Ri and Min Joon in order to force their romance. Now, don't get me wrong — I LOVE romance and the actors have some pretty nice chemistry — but none of it really fits. Not with the rest of the story, the pacing of the rest of the story, the (small amount of) backstory we get for the two of them, the tone of the rest of the story, or the initial characterisation we were given. It feels like a literal case of "here is a male and a female of roughly the same age and now we need to make them kiss because heteronormativity" with no thought to how to actually make it believable. So they cram in cutesy and supposedly romantic scenes (often with Min Joon feeling a really confusing need to protect Ha Ri? Even if she could literally kick his ass? But because she's a woman he has to I guess?) that either happen out of the blue or just way too early in their relationship for it to be believable and it just annoys me so much.

I swear, after the car explosion thing in... can't remember the episode. But Kang Woo drags Min Joon out of the burning car, yeah? And Ha Ri shows up and FOR SOME GODDAMN REASON pulls the unconscious and clearly injured Min Joon into her arms? Ma'am. Girlfriend. Bestie. He's got a bleeding head injury — possibly also a neck injury. Maybe don't move him more than necessary? Also, isn't he a conman? As in, the type of person you claim to hate most because of your tragic past? Why are you suddenly pulling him into your arms like he's your injured boyfriend? He was fine just lying on the ground, I promise. This really isn't necessary.

And THEN you find out it's because she needed to get blood on her jacket so that Min Joon could get worried and ask her about it when he was at the hospital later and she could tell him she was fine because it was all his but ooooh loooook, he caaaares about her! Isn't that cuuuuuute?

Someone please put me out of my misery.

I legit had to pause the episode and just stare out into space for a couple of seconds when that happened because that's just SUCH TERRIBLE WRITING. I can do better than that and writing isn't even my job! It made NO sense for her to act the way she did and it honestly just made her look stupid. All for a clumsy attempt at furthering her romance with Min Joon? I am FUMING.

(Is the script forcing you to be stupid, Ha Ri? Blink twice if you need me to come save you)

And the forced romance between Ha Ri and Min Joon is only made more hilarious by how effortless his connection is with Kang Woo. It's more consistent with their characters, consistent with the overall pacing, and genuinely more interesting. And it just baffles me how completely off the mark the writer was since Kang Woo is getting all the important emotional scenes with Min Joon, not Ha Ri.

Like, the scenes where Min Joon is vulnerable and talking about his childhood and dead brother? Which would be great in order to build trust between him and Ha Ri? He's having all of those scenes with Kang Woo. Which I don't mind, of course (it's HILARIOUSLY gay) but that just proves that the romance between Min Joon and Ha Ri was an afterthought and the build-up of it was just slapped on without much thought to the characters. It's romance for the romance's sake. Because the actual building of a relationship, sharing of emotions, of grief and painful memories? Min Joon doesn't do that nearly enough with Ha Ri to make the romance stick, especially due to the aforementioned problem with her having too little backstory and firm ground to stand on. He honestly has more connection, more in common, AND more chemistry with Kang Woo.

So, long story short, I feel your pain. Ha Ri is being treated so, so unfairly and it makes me so angry. But, on the other hand, I find the gay romance brewing between Kang Woo and Min Joon absolutely amazing. And, to my surprise, I might just have to retract my earlier statement about the writer not having any idea about how gay this is. Because I actually went to check who the screenwriter was and turns out it's the same woman who worked on Beyond Evil. Which I have not seen but reports tell me it's hella gay. So, tbh, the gay might not be as unintentional as I first thought?

Like, I obviously don't know this woman but it would be HILARIOUS if she's just sneaking gay shit into her shows and subtly sabotaging the straight romances by making them this shitty. I know we're reaching conspiracy theory levels here but I would definitely do that if I were her.

Thank you for your service, ma'am.

(Too bad you write such shitty female characters, at least in this drama)

Anyway. I'm genuinely confused by the tone of Mad Dog because they play it very straight (pun intended). I mean, looking at The Devil Judge I think it's pretty clear that there's a cheeky little undertone of "we know what we're doing but we're not going to say outright what it is — if you know, you know ;)" But in Mad Dog? They don't even really address the fact that Kang Woo and Min Joon have all the deep, emotional scenes while Min Joon and Ha Ri only get cringey and clumsy "romantic" scenes. But Min Joon and Ha Ri is the endgame?

While Kang Woo is probably meant to become a substitute older brother to Min Joon or something? But I really question why they had that whole "whoops, Min Joon accidentally impersonated Kang Woo's wife there for a second" plotline in that case. Man, I was laughing so hard x'D Like, Kang Woo outright says that Min Joon is the first person to cook for him and share a meal with him in that apartment since his wife died.

Sir. I... don't think you realise how unintentionally gay that sounds.

(But maybe your writer does. I'm keeping my eyes on you, ma'am)

Because if Min Joon had been a woman? That admission would have been taken as a hint of something romantic possibly brewing between them. Not necessarily that Min Joon was taking Kang Woo's wife's place, but stepping up as the next candidate, at the very least. And I find that absolutely HILARIOUS.

Okay, this is getting really, really long. As you can see, I also have A LOT of thoughts on Mad Dog x'D But also, as mentioned, I haven't finished it yet and if I ever were to write anything (which I honestly can't promise since it depends on how the drama ends and what my (already packed) schedule looks like) it wouldn't be able to until I have. But trust me when I say that I am quite intrigued to see where this goes — even if it means I have to suffer through the shoehorned flirting between Min Joon and Ha Ri.

(For the record, I am ANNOYED by how much I dislike those scenes. I WANT to like their romance! But it just feels so, so incredibly clumsy and forced and I, unfortunately, have standards. So it's a no from me so far)

Also, fun fact: I started Mad Dog as a palette cleanser after a lot of gay romance dramas, wanting something different. And, I mean, a story about life insurance fraud can't be gay, can it? So I went in with the best and purest intentions.

But then I started watching and somewhere around the point where Kang Woo slams Min Joon up against a wall for the first time I just put my head in my hands. Because I could see where this was going.

And then I made the mistake of looking up the poster for the drama and, I swear, I was beginning to have war flashbacks.

That's not gay at all.

And this isn't even the first time this has happened to me

Or even the second, third, fourth, or fifth. I think I'm up to seven or something? At this point, there's a joke amongst my friends that I have a gaydar meant specifically to locate gay dramas that aren't actually gay dramas — especially when I'm not actually looking for them.

It's a weird superpower to have, but there you go.

ANYHOW. Yes. Good luck with finishing this drama, I guess? I'll try to do the same but, considering my current pace, I can't say when I will. It's a bit of a drag sometimes, not going to lie. But I do like the plot and characters enough to want to see through to the end.

Also, I'm so glad you liked chapter 39 of Who Holds the Devil! Thank you! Now take care, darling 💜

[mytragedyperson]

I don't think you understand how important it is to me that Kageyama, Atsumu, Sakusa, Komori, and Korai be friends. Every time I see Sakusa and Atsumu in toxic Hinata harem, part of me gets sad. Hinata has so many friends, and if it's fluff I don't mind. But can we please just let Kageyama have frends, particularly in people not in Karasuno. The boy needs more friends. I promise the world won't end if Atsumu and Sakusa like and are friendly to both Hinata and Kageyama.

Also, I don't really like toxic Hinata harem anyway. There's like one person that's done it in a way I like. Also Hinata would not stand for that shit. If anyone picks on Kageyama, he will not be friends with him. That's his best friend, his platonic soulmate (or romantic if you prefer). Also I once saw someone do it where the Hinata harem literally run Kageyama over and then, after Hinata got mad at them for it, they apologised and I'm pretty sure he forgave them. Look, I'm gonna take my own advice and avoid this, and if you enjoy reading or writing this, that's great. But idk, there's something weird about the way they just brush off their treatment of Kageyama in the end. Like they get yelled at by Hinata once and that's deemed punishment enough. No, Tsukishima you're going to jail'

Maybe it's because I prefer Kageyama. Anyway, main point, please let Kageyama have friends that aren't Hinata. I promise the world won't end. On that note, Kageyama friendship centric fanfiction recs? please? I don't care about romantic ships but please, I need to see Kageyama have good friends.

Also Kageyama does have another friend at training camp, the guy he sits with at lunch but I can't remember his name, but he should be in the squad too. And Ushijima because manga panels, and also just two blunt socially awkward people

I'm not tagging Hinata harem but if you see this anyway, no hate to Hinata or the canon versions of these characters. and I mean no hurt with my comments about the fanfics. It's just not my personal sup of tea

[heartshapedcreaturefromcriptoon]

Oh shut the fuck up October 28th 2019 was the day all your disability activist friends reblogged posts vowing to instantly block anyone who put anything to do with the series on their dashboard and you would go into the main tags to get away from that and there would be a million suicide baitors and harassment campaigns and endless whining about the shows existence and people calling for Medrano's immediate death waiting for you and when it was the A24 greenlight announcement it was the same thing only calling for her to be fired, and when Jamie Lee Curtis did her shout out tweet and then at least one 21 year old tenderqueer with an @ about how they want to fuck slasher villains would be in her replies trying to talk down to and harass Jamie and then people you thought were your friends start harassing you for posting one Hazbin sketch in an adult queer server because they don't like it and you'll be banned if you post about it again, and you try to start telling them what happened to even Jamie for talking about it, just to prove a point, and then suddenly it's "I don't care what Jamie Lee Curtis has to say" even though all they had to do to see how volatile the topic was, was to just look and all the deleted threads and arguments taking place below the actual tweet to know the actual tweet wasn't the point, and you were all so happy be discussing Ryan Murphy's Scream Queens and Everything Everywhere All At Once sometime before that. And then all your queer adult friends end up banning you for "bullying".

Yeah, I'm saying nothings been the same since 2019 when the pilot came out, have you been living under a rock or what? Things are just as fucked now as they were then, if not more so.

And OP can shut the fuck up about radiodust too. The only thing they have half a point about is charlastor and that's only because of what also happened on Viv's birthday.

But most recently, it's been obnoxious sex repulsed aroace nerd prudes who say shit like "lads" and "friendo" enjoying getting a sense of popularity and power and ownership over a certain character in the fandom enough to go mad and start bullying not only allos but questioning aro/ace people as well as aro/ace children (who shouldn't even be in the fandom) for wanting to possibility maybe smooch The Radio Demon on the lips or liking the fact he actually has his own Valentines merch or just wanting him to have any kind of romantic merch at all or just pointing out the fact that he's sexy because he is objectively Sexy.

Jesus Fucking Christ ...

[lost-and-ephemeral]

Series: In Her Shadow, pt.2 (ft. main trio)

Part 1 | Part 2

Slowly but surely she replaced you in his heart.

Pairing: Xavier x reader, Zayne x reader, Rafayel x reader (seperate)

Tags: angst, hurt no comfort, reader is not MC, breakup

A/N: I recieved a lot of comments and request asking me to continue, so here we are! I've tried my best. Ty everyone, I appreciate every message, even if it would be hard to mention every single one of them in this post. Also, if you want to be tagged in future fics, let me know!

-`♡´- MASTERLIST -`♡´- 

Rafayel

You began to notice that Rafayel was spending less and less time with you, choosing his bodyguard over you.

It wasn't obvious at first, yeah, but as time went on, everything became so noticeable that you couldn't ignore it anymore. Especially when he forgot about your plans with him and didn't even consider apologizing for it.

The smell of someone else's perfume in his studio, the way Rafayel would leave you at home and take her to all the important events because "you probably don't like spending time among journalists and annoying guests." It seems that he didn't even notice the moment when you were completely estranged from each other.

And all your attempts to talk to him about it ended with nothing.

"She's my bodyguard," he'd say. "No wonder I take her everywhere I go. Is there anything wrong with that?"

Yes, a lot of things were wrong.

But he was completely unwilling to notice it, and you were tired of collecting the shards of your broken heart from the floor day after day. Those warm feelings that brought a sense of lightness and happiness in your heart suddenly turned into pure torture.

You had to end it all, even if it'll hurt so much.

When you arrived at his studio this morning, you came face to face with "Ms. Bodyguard" herself. She was just about to leave, and didn't even hesitate to embrace your beloved. Right in front of you.

Maybe you would've exploded from all these negative emotions, if you had any strength left to be mad or to cry. But there was only emptiness in your heart.

You became strangers to each other.

"I'm breaking up with you," you said without any regret and pushed him away as he tried to hug you. "I don't want to be a second choice after your precious bodyguard."

"W-wait, why? What... But I didn't do anything!" he replied confused, apparently not realizing how much he's been hurting you all this time.

"Maybe that's the point. That you'd do anything for her, but not for me."

He looked at you with the same confusion in his eyes, trying to figure out if it was a joke, but you continued before leaving this place forever.

"You were everything to me, Rafayel. But for you, I was just a small episode of your life. I'm tired. You've been spending all your free time with her, like I didn't exist. It'll be better this way. Goodbye."

No matter how long he was calling your name, asking you to stop, to come back and talk with him, you didn't.

Zayne

Loving a cardiac surgeon with his busy schedule is hard.

But it's even harder when he no longer cares about your existence and spends a significant amount of time with his childhood friend.

After Zayne forgot about your reservation at the restaurant, making you feel like you were the last fool in this world, some more time has passed.

Yeah, he apologized. No, he didn't start spending less time with his "friend".

It's hard to count how many evenings you spent alone when he stayed late at work for her or was invited to a "friendly" dinner with her. But it happened often enough so finally your love turned into suffering.

At first you tried to convince yourself that you're too jealous and he's just happy to finally reunite with someone close to him from his youth. You care about your friends too, don't you?

But it only got worse.

All your plans were constantly adjusted to his friend's wishes. She wants to take him to a cafe at the same time you were planning to go to the cinema? "Sorry, love, let's reschedule our date for another day". You've made him his favorite dinner? Too bad, his friend already brought him dinner at work and he's not hungry.

Eventually you started feeling like he stopped enjoying your time together and just continued to exist in the same apartment with you out of habit.

Talking didn't get you anywhere, because Zayne didn't notice how much he was hurting you (or he simply didn't want to notice it) with his actions and only distanced himself from you even more.

At some point you felt like he put an ice wall around himself again.

He stayed late again this evening, completely forgetting his promise to spend time with you. You packed your things with tears in your eyes, ready to say goodbye to life with Zayne once and for all.

And he showed up at the doorstep of his apartment just as you were ready to leave.

"What's going on?" his voice didn't betray a shred of emotion. "Where are you going?"

"I'm going to leave you and your lovely friend together so I don't have to be an unwanted addition to your life."

Zayne was taken aback at this statement and was about to say something, but you interrupted him.

"You were the one who brought happiness and comfort into my life. You were the one who made me feel loved and wanted. But now I realize that I wasn't good enough for you. Goodbye."

You walked away and closed the door behind you, leaving him all alone.

Xavier

Before, you without a doubt would've said that your relationship with Xavier was the ultimate dream.

But now it wasn't actually true.

Yes, your beloved still showed care and attention every spare minute he had. Just not to you. It seemed as if his colleague started to occupy his every thought.

During dinner, on a walk, after missions. He was always talking about her, how strong she is, and how lucky he is that she chose him as her partner. His eyes were shining with delight you had never seen before.

You were happy for him, but only until it crossed the line. Only until you started to feel like he was in love with her, not with you.

One day you found yourself completely miserable. Xavier texted you that he would be late because they had "decided to celebrate another successful mission". Except that you were usually the one he shared his joy with. But things have changed.

Even though you were the brightest star in his world, you were inevitably lost behind the glow of the Moon.

You were trying to be better, to be more interesting. Trying to reach an unattainable ideal. But you couldn't. After all, maybe you were never meant to be together if it turned out like this. Maybe you weren't enough for him.

You couldn't remember the last day you didn't cry. Sometimes alone, sometimes locking yourself in the bathroom after another conversation about this "super-strong collegue". But Xavier didn't seem to notice it at all.

"I thought maybe you'd be interested to know what happens during missions," he said when you brought up this painful topic.

And, yes, you were interested. But all you heard was, "She took down that Wanderer so easily, I couldn't take my eyes off her." Or, "she's so good with her weapon, it's amazing."

He distanced himself from you so much that you hardly spent any time together.

He wasn't even home the day you left.

Xavier sent you a message saying he'd be late again. As usual, with her. Even though he promised to have a movie night and you had already prepared everything you needed for it.

Maybe it's even better if you don't see the look in his eyes the moment you tell him you're breaking up with him. You packed your things and left a note on the table, next to the snacks you bought.

"Maybe in another universe I would be worthy of you so you could look at me with the same adoration. I can see that you enjoy spending time with her much more. And we should break up so you don't torment my heart anymore. Goodbye."

You glanced around his apartment one last time before leaving it forever.

♡ tags: @skyowlz @prettytemis @aishasreality @randompersonwhoexist @kreishin @reni502 @moonyzstarz @chin-chii

[omarandjohnny]

SHIPPY SHIP SHIP!

Tagged by @negrowhat <333333333333333333333333333333

1. What ship were you completely obsessed with when you were a teenager, but now you don't care anymore?

I didn't really have a fixed ship to hang my hat on in those days (aka the before the internet tiemz), but Buffy and Pike (movie BTVS) were the main couple I fixated on back then (still was figuring out why movie Lestat and Louis made me feel funny in my tummy at that time, so Buffy and Pike were the easier option LOL)

2. Which ship would you consider your first one?

Roz and Dan from Night Court; I was 7 and I wanted them married and arguing until the end of time <3

3. Your first fanfic belonged to which couple?

(hops in the wayback machine) Pretty sure I was writing for Greg/Nick (CSI) just a bit before Ennis/Jack (Brokeback). Still so very thankful that those four introduced me to friends I'd still have in my life 20 years later!

4. Do you remember the first couple you saw a fanart over?

I very clearly remember the Spangel fanvids that took more than day to download from our AOL dialup, yes XD

5. Did you ever get into ship discourse?

Attempting to nail jello to a tree would be a far more productive use of my time.

6. Did you used to have any no-otp or have it currently?

Can't say anything comes to mind, really.

7. Who were the couple in the last fanfic you read?

Had to go through my AO3 history, last time I had a clear enough head to attempt to read anything was early autumn last year (oof) and it was a modern AU of Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang that I don't think I finished because I really can't recall any of it. Ah, well.

8. Currently, do you have any OTPs?

Since I can't engage in fic it's hard for me to keep hold of the newer ships, so my brain tends to fall back on old reliables- Loustat/Loumand being at the top at this very moment because the fandom's waking up again for season 2 in May.

9. Is there any couple that, to this day, you are extremely mad about not getting together?

Another one that I can't think of anything.

10. Is there any ship you used to dislike but now you think they are kind of interesting?

Not Really, if I hated them then I'm sure I still hate them now. (keeping your answer here, Eboni, because same)

11. Do you have any ship that, in the past, was considered normal but now you would be cancelled over?

I'd be cancelled over any ship at any time for anything, such is the nature of this goofball puritanical mindset that has taken over fandom socmed. (I know the problem reaches so much further than that, but I'm not clearheaded enough to write a dissertation LOL)

12. What was your favorite crack ship?

Can't say I've ever had one.

13. Who is the couple you read more fanfics of?

20+ years ago I was slowly killing copious amounts of trees and our at-home printer with Spangel fics that I didn't want to lose (have since lost all of the printouts, and the fics are still online in their respective webrings, yikes) So yeah, Spangel would probably still win. Ennis/Jack, and Wangxian would round out the top three, I'm sure.

14. What most of your ships usually have in common?

Bastard-coated bastards, pastel/goth, grumpy/sunshine.

15. What do you absolutely hate in a ship?

Drawing a blank here. Though, I will have a harder time engaging if the source material is mainly written in 1st person POV, which is why I'd be considered a fake Vampire Chronicles fan XD (forever thankful for my friends that actually read the books and school me on what I don't know)

[starlightshore]

explain Danny phantom to someone who’s never seen it before?

uhhhhh so i can only talk about it as the most insane kinda fandom person because

i was obsessed with this show when it first aired when I was 8 years old. it was my first fandom. i read fanfic for it before i even knew what fanfic was. its HEAVILY tied to my nostalgia and I've been engaging with the fandom on/off for literally 19 years. at this point DP is in my DNA.

while it's not my main hyperfixation (thats undertale) its the one tag i visit regularly and the one fandom I'll jump to every few months and binge fics for. i don't even read UT fics anymore but the DP fandom is always doing something. its very active!

under the cut I talk about my thoughts on the show, the fandom and explain the premise. It's a wild ride.

TLDR; i have a lot of THOUGHTS on this show and i do not actually recommend it. MAYBE if you're curious explore the fandom and some fics but be careful about it, it's a bit gratuitous with its angst.

If you want a basic premise: local 14 year old accidentally lets loose hell but also has become part ghost. This kid can fit SO much trauma in him.

first off: I fucking love Danny Phantom.

And I'm going to spend the next two segments complaining about it. Feel free to skip if you're already aware of this /or don't wanna linger on it.

Second off: This show fucking sucks*

* Ok fine yes sometimes it can be good, but it will always have an asterisk next to it.

it has NOT aged well. it was created by an asshole who's got a long shitlist of things he's done and still does that's all terrible. i am not one to hate someone publicly unless its for something like this. Feel free to google what Bitch Fartman has done if you're curious but I'll warn you: he is a horrible person and he disgusts me. I only acknowlege him when its to mention how awful he is and how I do not want to support him.

This is not like with FNAF where supporting that franchise supports Scott. Danny Phantom first aired 19 years ago. The show was written, directed, and sure as hell animated by a team of professionals. It is not his sole creation. Studio Animation is not the sole work of an individual. I respect (most) animators and the hard work they've done and do. IIRC Shitfartman doesn't even have the rights to the IP anymore. I assume he gets residuals though. That said the only canonical piece of media we've gotten is a graphic novel that was released last month. Up until then, supporting DP was just not literally a thing you could do!

Its not just the creator who sucks. There's a lot of BS in the show too.

the show is very early 2000s (and even then thats no excuse) and it has a bingo card worth of shit in it. racism, bigotry, ableism! you name it. I do not condone and i do NOT recommend this show because of this! its horrible with what they did with this show and its shocking it was acceptable enough to put on TV. you literally can't do shit like that anymore.

I'm not going to go list every detail of every horrible, fucked up thing the show has done. The list is too long and I haven't watched the actual show in a few years now. by god, I know there is a list out there though.

Anyway outside of my obligatory "fuck this show actually" rant aside

i do love this show because it DOES have a lot of good and cool stuff outside that. but also. its so much wasted potential.

the core premise is:

Hey what if a pair of paranormal obsessed mad scientist parents punched a hole into the after life hell dimension- and what if their son was basically spiderman-ed about it?

And here's the core part of the premise: Danny only keeps his identity a secret to the humans. Ghosts learn like, pretty much straight away that he's a Halfa (half human, half ghost). He's if spiderman's worst fear wasn't the villains but if like. Aunt May was going to rip him apart.

Oh yeah that's. a thing. Danny's parents literally want to rip his ghost identity apart from, and I quote, "molecule to molecule."

For a an comedy-action show its WEIRDLY morbid and dark at times but then has the tonal whiplash to make you question what the fuck did they just do. How'd they do that and then not care they just wrote that in. Seriously. It'll just lore drop or hint to dark things and then brush it aside because it's main focus is comedy.

Anyway back to explaing what the show even is about. the show likes to say Danny got his DNA merged with ectoplasm but that's stupid af i'd rather say he died but only stayed half dead. He can transform between the two states: living and dead. But he's not just two halves that make a whole -the two sides blend together. He can use his ghost powers as a human -and early on he couldn't control them so he'd just. go intangible or invisible at the worst moments.

The show just. jumps right in. You don't get to see the accident outside the intro (at least until season 2 when they retcon some stuff) you just have it thrown into your lap. He has powers now. He sucks at it. Deal with it.

I think it's important to acknowledge that this show was written before Netflix did streaming. Before Plot heavy cartoons were a thing. (Not to say they didn't have reoccuring plot, it justw asn't the same thing as it is now.) You had to write the show with the limits of:

Comedy being a major focus

You have to write it with the expectation that anyone could jump in and (reasonably) understand most things going on. While there's some continuity and plot progression, the status quo is god.

because streaming wasn't a thing yet, you could only watch the show by jumping into whatever the fuck episode was playing. I doubt it played in order all the time. You just couldn't make a cartoon that had weeks upon weeks of plot developments and expect people to keep up.

The show is, in fact, meant for kids. While it does dive into some darker stuff (being ya know, a ghost show) its still going to be overly silly.

So while YEAH i'll complain about the very very shitty things the show did but I can't soley blame Fuckhateshitman for all of it. It's the restrictions it was made under + likely a lot more circumstances I don't understand. I am a hobbiest animator. I have no real world experience in the animation industry. I can critique the final product but I can never understand what shaped the cartoon. If shitheadmcgee wasn't involved and the studio gave the show more room + had you know, more POC and women on team + animation (even for kids) was respected more then who KNOWS what the show could of been! But like. its a 2000s show. It is what it is. I think the show has its good and bad and i'll harp a lot on the bad rn because I think its important to acknowledge especially to new people, but I do want to frame it by saying it really is the product of its time.

I want it to be better and I hope if it gets rebooted its better. We expect a lot more from cartoons now then we did then. (I know this was a long tangent + kinda over simplifying things but whatever, moving on.)

The (Ph)Fandom

19 years later and here we are. Enter the Phandom (called that before that phill and whoever used the term, idc i'm still going to use the term.) We, the fandom, almost completely just retconned the show's finale. (obviously SOME people still like it but its like. an incredibly small percentage) Like. we straight up pretend it didn't happen. i don't even want to get into it rn. It was SO BAD that the graphic novel that just released literally (spoilers) retconned everything about it aside from a ship pairing.

Anyway the Phandom- personally I think it goes a little TOO harsh in its angst. LIke, maybe a bit too much. But it DOES add nuance and explores the themes and lore that the show just flat out refused to engage with at all. It really digs into the premise of "hey wtf this 14 year is half dead. hello? hello??? thats fucked up.... lets explore that." and i'm here for it.

As long as its not like, masochistic and gratuitous for no real reason. 😬That is my biggest complaint with the fandom is that sometimes it goes over board.

But yeah outside of that, it can also be VERY silly so expect tonal whiplash here too! We got memes. We got fandom holidays and events. Whacky stuff.

OH AND OCs. We have fandom OCs like Wes. The best nonexistant character ever. Love that lil weirdo <3. His whole schtick was "What if Danny had another human villain? What if this random background classmate knew his secret and was trying to expose it?" and its spiraled from there. No one ever believes Wes and he's tortured by it. Some make him out to be a conspiracy nut while others make him more of a threat. (or a joke, as I do) Considering this show has a ghost-version of the Men in Black (Guys in White) conspiracy actually lines up accurately for what Wes does. And, you know. The Fenton's have a portal to the afterlife in their basement. Honestly pretty reasonable.

so like the fandom just kinda... picks and chooses the canon. It does have an edge of "we can do better" but in fairness, as I just discussed, there's an awareness that the version we make is not restricted by the environment the show was made under. I would hope most of the fandom understands this and doesn't say it in the sense of like "oh yeah I know better than professional writers and artists fuck the show 1000%" instead of acknowledging Yes He Fucking Sucks but its also more complicated. I don't want to foster an environment of superiority and disrespect to any media/creators (with exceptions ofc) cause. Jesus christ we live on the internet in 2023 you have to know why I feel this way by now.

Anyway with that in mind, I do think it's a positive thing! I mean, fuck, the show had no new content for almost 20 years I think its obvious by now we'd just make our own doll house out of it by now.

So yeah the Phandom is like this:

We're oddly consistent with the phandom lore we've built around from the canon's lore. We expand it, we make it more queer, we do our own thing. And I really enjoy it! I partake in it! It's pretty cool.

So while there's some merit to the OG show I would not recommend it on account of the amount of BS I mentioned at the start of the post. But I would recommend the fandom! As long as you got a strong black list with trigger warnings in place. Again, I think the fandom is a lil too gratuitous. But oh my god I love so much of what the fandom does. There's so many fics that just stick with me and (ha) haunt me. There's a reason I still come back after all these years. there are SO many good fics.

also the fandom got adopted by the DC fandom a year or two ago. personally i have to have like 80 tags blocked so i can even navigate the tag. Its not my thing but i'm happy people are having fun!!

[smosh-fessions]

People either coddle Damien for his autism and traits or treat him like shit for them and I have yet to see an in between. He's in his 30s and he doesn't need people to crusade for him. If something bothers him he can take care of it himself.

And on the flip side, if you don't like him and every reason is an autistic trait, find some healing in your soul.

I've seen it be spoken about across multiple platforms that people either hate Damien because he's autistic, or it horseshoes around into the baby gloves handling of him. I too, am autistic, and have experienced both sides of this coin myself and it sucks to be on either side. Twitter appears to often be the side where everyone hates him because of his autistic and other ND traits, and here it seems to be the other one.

Continuation under the cut.

I understand caring about the man. I wholeheartedly do. But when you start acting like you know his wishes and you need to protect him from anything that may make him uncomfortable in any small way, you've gone way too far.

Doing things like threatening telling the mods in his server like they're guard dogs because someone repeated something said publicly is a problem.

I'm going to say this and I'm going to say this once: If multiple people ever pile on me in my replies again for making a statement based on what someone who is part of the pair of people being spoken about has said themselves, I'm restricting replies and reblogs on that post because it is highly unnecessary, especially considering more than one of them already knew who was being spoken about due to that person having made posts about it themselves and dropping hints. No one had to dig for any information. People are allowed to talk about very, very public info posted where literally anyone can see it whether you like it or not.

Considering the info was stumbled on by the poster themselves outside of the subscriber discord channel, straight on main, and people are acting like I hacked into a mainframe, you all need to take a step back and re-evaluate the level of parasocial you're operating at.

This would be like if a bunch of Amanda fans got mad someone knows her husband's instagram handle after she herself tagged him.

If someone had dug through things like they did to Spencer to know this, that's one thing. But the person posted it publicly on their own. You don't get to shoot the messenger over that, especially one who also said that they aren't a thousand percent sure, but the amount of hints very much seems like they're together, and its their right to never confirm it if they don't want to and that I hope Damien is happy whatever his situation is.

The fandom as a whole has had no problem immediately saying Bailey and Alex are dating despite there not being a verbal confirmation anywhere. But because there's no verbal confirmation involving Damien, anyone who talks about it has done something wrong (?). The only difference in the two men here that I can see that would lead people to treating them so differently is that Damien is very openly ND, and Alex is not.

If you have an issue, take issue with someone who has apparently claimed to want privacy and secrecy for safety breaking that enough times that people who do not actively follow them and came across their page through tags alone knows exactly what they're talking about. You don't say you want secrecy for safety and then tell people the secret.