#;; she's also my bestie lowkey so she knows i'll do right by her 🥹 BUT I'M STILL LIKE 'ME??'

[kaerinio]

i will be here this afternoon & evening! i hope you're all having a wonderful wednesday! 💖✨

[carmenized-onions]

chapter 1 - going back to my roots!! (spoilers for those who haven’t rear the most recent chapter)

the way you mirrored that first sentence with the mikey - EVIL

if it’s a love confession she should definetely answer😁 - imagine if it was…imagine that

if carmy knew her neighbourhood wasn’t peaceful he’d have her in his apartmentment at once!!

But a part of you is relieved it’s a thing that’s broken, and not her - oh this hurted

“The doorknob on the inside, broke off. And right now, or, more like, 5 minutes ago, the handle on the outside broke off too.” - the way it all goes back to her, mikey and richie ugh your mind

Now that’s an uncomfortably familiar voice. - RICHIEEEE. ugh reading it with all the contexr is just wow!!!powerful stuff

Nobody has to know you’re wearing pajama shorts under this - lowkey hot tho😁

an older woman smoking and having an emotional spat - donna!! makes sense that chippy never met her but oh i wonder how that would’ve gone

She gently slaps your cheek - tina is so cuteee

You’ve never said his name to him - the way everything makes sense now oooof

love the switch up between “Sweetheart, I need you to stand up for me, Carmen Chef Sir.” and “….Who the fuck is Tony?”

“Aye… Cousin?”- i used to think the cousin was for carmy but it’s for her 🥹🥹🥹 my fave besties 🥹💕🫶🏼😭 (also i’ve had two dreams now about richie being my best friend… yeah the mental illness is,,,)

Girlfriend? Probably - that could’ve been you already if you listened to mikey’s advice but i guess claire had to happen *for the plot*🙄

“You’re just. Cold.” - sobbing actually

you lower your arms— But. He opts to place his chin on your shoulder - 😭😭😭 them!!!!!

retaining - the bold on retaining 💀💀💀

definitely a virgin - ajajsjejrjri not for long (well i can dream 😁🫶🏼)

sweetheart, asshole - so true 💕💕

omg remember back when the chapters were this short (compared to the newest ones)yeah me neither. love you love your dedication!!<3

this is the best day of my life, getting people's re-reading thoughts is the best experience of my life AND FROM YOU TOO LU!! LOVE YOU!!!

ANyways. CHAPTER 1 THOUGHTS BUT WITH C O N T E X T now.

I can't remember if I always planned to mirror the intro line with Mikey. I'm pretty sure I did? I think I went back and forth a couple times on whether or not it was stupid-- And it very well might be, but I know it makes everyone rereading mad so I think it was worth it and good and cool of me.

Everyone gets so hung up on the love confession line now it makes me so happy. I'll be so fr I didn't plan Squidink to happen in the beginning-- Though I did originally concept this whole series as x Syd before switching lanes, I don't remember when it locked in for me that I was going to be gay about it. Probably Zero Pulse? Yeah probably.

carmen's gonna crash tony's credit score on purpose so she has to move out: canon-- canon i said it it's canon! kidding

THE DOOORKNOOBBB this I always planned-- I don't know if they go over it in canon but fr why the fuck did the inner knob break off so easy that's so deeply concerning man.

RICCHIEEE, he IS powerful stuff bro.

"lowkey hot tho😁" so tony is now a character and it's Tony x reader now, i see?

DONNNAAAAA, it only makes sense for Tony to be in a rush and avoid Donna in this opener, but I do also wonder how violently different this night would've gone if she listened in on their convo for like even two seconds.

It's extremely funny to go from "i need to be so nice to this kid, he meant everything to my best friend" to "what the FUCK are you yapping about?" in two seconds.

I THINK A LOT OF PEOPLE USED TO THINK RICHIE SAYING COUSIN WAS FOR CARMEN, I remember for chapter 2 so many people going awe he calls her cousin-- baby, always has! Also were you a handyman in those dreams be HONEST!!!

smh chip if you simply just followed big bros advice you could probably be living together by now but NO Carmen had to get with the ACTUAL DOCTOR instead of the EMT!!!! bro loves women in healthcare

JUST COLD!!!! JUST COLD!!! man if i had a hat i'd throw it and i literally wrote all this. The little descriptions Mikey gave of his siblings were also honestly some of my favourite bits to write from this first chapter. Had to look at me and my two brothers and go how would I honestly describe these two and how brutal would I be about it? 100% older brother Mikey has to humble Carmen's ass with a ALWAYS EMPHASIZED R E T A I N I N G. He's proud but like. come on you didn't get them, carm.

i miss the days of short chapters. though I think we're kind of going back to it if not taking a brief pitstop of short. This next one I pray to god is under 10k i'll 86 myself i swear to god. LOVE YOU!!!

memes are so good, who the FUCK are you cousin!!! sydney's new apartment in S3 should be free-- rent should be free during pride month actually that's the law also i'm pretty sure everyone IS making sex up anyways anyways do i have a piece of wip i could give you my darling let's see

oh i do but i'm gonna be so fucking mean about it.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY YAPPING ABOUT!!!!??? WHO KNOWSSS (i know)

anyways i have to pack up from work and get the FUCK out of here see you all later conspire over this screenshot losers love u

[swiftie-erin]

Here's my first-listen review of TTPD and TTPD: The Anthology!

disclaimer: i broke down the rankings per album because trying to do them all together would've been a hell of a journey and would've taken more than one day / been more than just a "first listen." and per usual, take the songs at the bottom with a grain of salt because all of them are so close and even the ones at the bottom feel like they should be in the top ten

Overall review: wow, this was a lot to process. I keep trying to think about whether I like TTPD or TTPD: The Anthology better, but honestly I can't choose. so much heart-wrenching pain, such beautiful lyrics, and incredible reflections on love, loss, inner turmoil, what-ifs, and using writing as an outlet. this is absolutely going to be on repeat through spring and summer!

1. Fortnight - lowkey would've loved more Post Malone on this song but this is one of my faves!!

2. TTPD - I love the storytelling and I love the way Taylor says "TTPD" and "nofuckingbody" hehe

3. My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys - the imagery?? "queen of sand castles he destroys"??? omg this is one of my faves.

4. Down Bad - Love this song sonically and love hearing Taylor say fuck LOL. this is my fave song i think!

5. So Long, London - 🥺🥺 "i'm pissed off that you let me give you all that youth for free" gives me goosebumps, i love this song

6. But Daddy I Love Him - tbh good for you taylor, get em. your life is your own and only you get to tell yourself what you can or can't do, or who you can or can't love!

7. Fresh Out the Slammer - the lyrics are so good and the bridge transition is so beautiful!!!

8. Florida!!! - same bbg, we all need a dose of escapism once in a while (also i love the 🍃 mention hehe). fuck me up florida!!!

9. Guilty as Sin? - this is the song I pre-claimed and tbh it does not disappoint at all!

10. Who's Afraid of Little Old Me? - the guitar, so good omg. the emotion in taylor's voice is raw and the female rage is palpable, love this song.

11. I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can) - love the ending and love the chorus!!

12. loml - ouchie. the lyricism and that last chorus, wow.

13. I Can Do It With a Broken Heart - we love a good depressive pop song!! "all of the pieces of me shattered as the crowd was chanting 'more!'" and the click track!!

14. The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived - men ain't shit, taylor. what'd he do? I'll deliver your message LET ME AT EM-

15. The Alchemy - i'm so glad taylor is in a better place 🥹 it truly gives "karma is the guy on the chiefs coming straight home to me"

16. Clara Bow - such a beautiful song sonically, shows both the hope and hardships of wanting to be in the spotlight

17. The Black Dog - the second verse, OUCHIE. the bridge? i've died. i love this song more than i expected to.

18. imgonnagetyouback - i love the chorus and actually the entire song tbh

19. The Albatross - i'm very intrigued with the tale we're being told. people truly will read something about you, believe it, then crucify you for it.

20. Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus - such a beautiful, sad song. what-ifs (especially for people like taylor and i who have anxiety) can be so, so much more heart-wrenching than knowing

21. How Did It End? - the lyrics. the sound. everything unspoken. how everyone wants to know what happened but she's not even sure herself.

22. So High School - so goddamn cute!!! i couldn't be happier that taylor is happy and thriving with trav 🥹🫶

23. I Hate It Here - "when they found a better planet, only the gentle survived" BESTIE i wish. i'm there right with you, girl. the world is awful and living in your mind often is easier and better. also, i too read the secret garden as a child hehe

24. thanK you alMee - omg, this song. taylor is truly coming to terms with what gave her scars and acknowledging it and moving forward. i'm so fuckin proud of her.

25. I Look In People's Windows - "i'm afflicted by the not knowing" ugh me too girlie. the anxiety, the contemplation, the fantasies; i'm glad neither of us are alone in knowing these feelings all too well

26. The Prophecy - i love this song 🥺 it's one of my faves. it reminds me of Foolish One, it's so desperate and hopeful at the same time.

27. Cassandra - i'm a greek/roman history slut so i love this already. i love the intertwined story that she creates, it's powerful.

28. Peter - bruh this song makes me want to cry. Betty has turned off her porch light 🥺

29. The Bolter - I love the way this song sounds! the first chorus sets the stage so well and the chorus is lowkey catchy

30. Robin - precious lyrics about keeping children innocent so they can enjoy their childhood while they have it 💗

31. The Manuscript - as a poet and writer myself, i relate to this song so much. writing truly is an outlet for processing emotions and at the end of it, all of those feelings are part of the writing and no longer yours. you're free.