#//slowly redoing graphics (+ tags) how do we feel

[adamsappl]

badly injured man not done partying yet

[lover-of-midnight]

Difference - chapter 3

ating:

Mature

Archive Warning

Graphic Depictions Of Violence

Category:

M/M

Fandom:

Merlin (TV)

Relationships:

Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)

Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)

Leon & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)

Leon & Merlin (Merlin)

Gaius & Merlin (Merlin)

Characters:

Merlin (Merlin)

Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)

Uther Pendragon (Merlin)

Gaius (Merlin)

Balinor (Merlin)

Hunith (Merlin)

Nimueh (Merlin)

Igraine Pendragon

Additional Tags:

Hurt/Comfort

Emotional Hurt

Angst

Fluff

Soul-mates AU

magical arthur

Protective Merlin (Merlin)

Hurt Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)

Child Abuse

Insecure Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)

touch-starved Arthur Pendragon

First and third POV Arthur Pendragon

Second and fourth chapter POV Merlin

Then combined chapters

Strangers to Friends to Lovers

Self-Harm

Suicidal Thoughts

Camelot's original heir is coming back

Arthur Knows About Merlin's Magic (Merlin)

Alternate Universe - Magic

Other Additional Tags to Be Added

Language:English

Arthur slumped against his desk, his homework was forgotten for a moment. He signed tiredly. He walked to the window.

There was a shadow of a doubt in his eyes as he watched children playing, women talking. Men shouting to get people to the market.

He scratched at his arm, he wished the buzz would go away the itch for his magic to get out. He could still remember ten years ago when Uther had found out about his magic.

Since that day he forced it down, trying to forget the fact that he could feel it move under his skin searching for a way out.

Arthur jumped slightly when there was a knock on the door. “Enter.” His voice was almost dead.

Gaius pressed the door open his eyes were worried. “Sire?” His voice was loud in the quiet room. Arthur sank into himself slightly.

“Don’t call me that please.” His eyes showed the plea clear.

“Arthur are you alright?” Gaius glanced to the door before he looked at the prince again.

So many years had gone by, in the beginning, Gaius had tried to help Arthur master his magic, but the fear he had developed for Uther had made him press his magic down.

Blocking it from forming and begin an aid to Arthur. In the end, it also started to make Arthur ill, his magic needed to be realised but since he didn’t. He started to struggle to sleep, concentration was a problem for him.

When Uther had a query about it, Gaius had simply told him a lie, if he had known that it was of magic that made Arthur ill he would have a breakdown again.

“No. Uther wants me to lead the men to a druid camp.” He didn’t bother to say anything else, they both know that by the end of the night the whole camp would be destroyed.

“I can’t do it, Gaius, I can’t just go and kill them, they are like me.” The last part came out almost hysterically.

Gaius pulled Arthur into his arms but when he jumped back Gaius could only look at him with worry in his eyes.

“What did he do?” Gaius knows Arthur and that he would have stood up against Uther.

Arthur glanced to the floor, his hands balled into fists. He bit the inside of his lip. “Whipping.” His voice could barely be heard.

“Let me see, child.” Gaius kept his voice gentle even if he wanted to blow up in anger.

Arthur could only shake his head, he didn’t want anyone to see the scars, how much of a disappointment he was.

“Arthur it could get infected. Let me see please.” Gaius made sure to softened his voice slightly. How many more times would he need to do this.

Barley fifteen and he already had more scars than most soldiers. It took a few tries from Gaius before Arthur worked with him.

Arthur hissed slightly when the bandages pulled away from the wound. He could hear Gaius mumbling something under his breath but he didn’t bother to try and figure out what he said.

“What happened here?” Gaius looked at the bruises around Arthur’s hips. Some of them were new and some were already turning yellow.

He could see Arthur tensing up. “It doesn’t matter.” Arthur’s voice was thick and broke slightly.

“It does matter Arthur.” Gaius walked around Arthur to look him in the eyes. All he could see was despair, someone who was let down.

There was wild desperation in Arthur’s eyes. “It doesn’t matter, nothing to be done of it.” Arthur bit his lip to keep himself from screaming, this wasn’t Gaius fault, he only wanted to help.

Gaius could only nod, he would leave pain medication and a salve for him. When Arthur was ready he would hopefully come and talk about it.

“All right Arthur, if you need an ear you know where to find me,” Gaius said as Arthur went to lay down on the bed.

His body was trembling with pent up anger and hate for the situation. He wished that he could fight back be a better person but there is nothing he can do at the moment. Hopefully soon Uther would meet the other world but Arthur knows unless it is a murder he wouldn’t go so easily.

Gaius cleaned the wounds before he put on a salve to keep infection out and then he bandages them with clean linen.

“Come to me tonight that I can redo them please Arthur.” Gaius wished that he could pull him into a hug but Arthur didn’t allow contact since he was around nine.

“I will Gaius.” Arthur’s voice was small. Gaius could only nod, as he left just before he reached the door he stilled.

“Thank you.” There was a softness to Arthur’s voice Gaius didn’t like, he sounded like the dead and Gaius wished that he could do something to change that for him.

“Of course child.” Gaius gave Arthur an encouraging smile before he left.

Arthur felt like a part of himself was slowly dying. He didn’t know how much more he would be able to take.

Every since Uther had made it clear that he didn’t care about his son, the other noble-teens would try and hurt him for being born into the royal family.

He walked to the mirror, his eyes darted to the bruising on his hips, there were more on his thighs and legs.

They had thought it would be a fun game to try and make him scream, they had known he wouldn’t be able to go to Uther with it, so they got away. He sat down heavily on the floor.

Sometimes he wished that he could only stay in his room and never leave. What does it matter that he would one day be King?

It would be better to just go and work in the fields in some village than suffer through with this bullshit.

Arthur felt tears burning at his eyes. He still had a lot of work to be done, but at the moment he just wanted to leave for a while.

And that is exactly what he did, he didn’t tell the guards at his door where he was going. He didn’t bother to leave a note.

Arthur kept his eyes on the ground as he walked to the stables, he was glad that he was still in his training clothes, so hopefully, William would allow him to work with him in the fields today.

The mare snorted when he walked to her, Arthur grimaced as he got her ready, it wasn’t far to go but he hoped that it would help him clear his head somewhat.

“Let’s go girl.” If there was anyone that could have heard his voice they would have been worried for the young one sounded dead.

With a light tap the horse started to move, Arthur allowed her to gallop, the wind was slightly cold as it sliced into his face but it gave him the courage to gather his strengths.

Camelot soon becomes a blur behind him. Arthur tried to ignore the pain in his back and bum. It wasn’t worth it to think about it.

After riding for two hours he walked into the small village, it was nothing more than a few huts and an inn.

It was one of the closeth villages to Camelot but the earth was harder to work and for the most part, it didn’t look like there was anything that really grew there. But the people work hard and they were happy.

Arthur slid off the mare, he grimaced at the movement and for a moment he had to stop and take a breath.

A sound made him spun around. For a moment it felt like his vision was going to go black but he pushed it away. He wanted to be here and he wasn’t going to allow his body to just give in on him.

“Arthur, we didn’t expect to see you so soon again.” The man’s face was covered in dirt but his green eyes shined with friendliness.

“William.” Arthur greeted the man, he was sometimes surprised that the man could be so big as he was but Arthur suspected that it came with the territory of being a woodworker.

“What are you doing here son?” William led the way to a small hut a little bit further down the road.

“Just needed to get out for a while. I was wondering if you maybe have some work for me?” Arthur kept his voice light.

William was silent for a while when Arthur had turned up the first time two years ago he was close to falling off his horse. It took a few days before Arthur had regained enough of his strength to talk and soon thereafter the guards had shown up searching for the prince.

He had fled from Uther the first time he was whipped, without taking care of the wounds he had gone for his horse, letting her go wherever she wanted.

“You can come and help me in the woods. Maria is working in the fields today.” William glanced to where a young woman was busy to get the earth ready to plant seeds.

Arthur was silent as they walked to the woods surrounding the village. The people had a saying that you could only take what you need and when a tree was done you needed to plant two in his stead.

William handed Arthur a dull axe, he watched silently as Arthur sharpened the blade before he got to work.

It looked like the work was distracting Arthur from whatever demons were tormenting him.

Too soon late afternoon was on them.

“Come and rest a little bit, I am assuming you are going home soon?” William asked as they carried the last wood to the hut.

Arthur glanced at the sun. “Unfortunately.” William gave him a worried look but there is nothing they can do for him even if he fitted in with the village people.

Maria gave Arthur a small cup of goat milk, her eyes were a warm brown, her brown hair in a plait behind her head.

“Thank you, Maria.” Arthur gave her a friendly smile. He knows when she gets married that the person would be one lucky man.

After an hour Arthur was forced to greet them, he could feel some of the wounds had reopened through the day but he didn’t care. His mind felt clearer and he hoped that he would have a chance to do this soon again.