#//on my hands and knees bawling rn

[skittykitty300]

//ooc post but lordy I feel the art block coming on, ohh nooooooo <:,[

[aether-link]

I don’t really like the theory of the avatar loves/identity thing but just this once I’ll accept it for Yangchens sake, because I love her sm rn and have a hc fic already now. The summary of this hc fic is Yangchen meeting Kuruk and having an emotional meeting together over Kavik and sends her to see his spirit to confess emotions.

-

Her seeing Kuruk for the first time and she’s still, silent seeing him. Only for her first words being soft saying Kavik’s name. Almost identical Kuruk is, to her that she thinks she’s seeing a ghost until Kuruk speaks his name in confusion making Yangchen blink a few times to make reality come back on who is standing in front of her.

Her hand drifts out towards him trying to make sure, Kuruk notices she’s wobbly on her feet and holds her hand supporting her weight until Yangchen drops to her knees from her accidental mistake. She’s apologising furiously towards him with her free hand to her temple, Kuruk kneeling beside still holding onto her, reassuring Yangchen. Telling her that he wasn’t offended in anyway but for him to apologise on his behalf on his appearance looking like a past love of hers, until Kuruk gives her a all familiar dumb smile. Yangchen notes the smile on the corner of her eye, her head picks up and she inhales then exhales calming herself. Back to her regal, professional looking self.

Helping her back up, Kuruk bows towards her, finally beginning their first spirit meeting together. Yangchen returns the gesture and greets herself, her avatar title and her name towards him. As they speak and get underway, she still can’t help herself but stare away at Kuruk while he tells about himself, muttering along until he picks up the constant stare.

“Why don’t you be out with it.” Kuruk speaks with roll of his wrist to add. It’s a minute of silence until she does, “It’s just daunting. You look exactly like him. My companion, Kavik. A water tribesmen just like you. The more I look the more I see him more and more...” her voice shifts to a lower tone towards the ground Kuruk stands on. “…You where in love with him weren’t you avatar Yangchen. You never really got to tell him didn’t you.” Kuruk’s words struck in a harsh like way, the truth dawning on her. “Yes. I just wish I told him sooner.” Silence grew between the two avatars, the spirit world they where in shifted and turned as time passed. The scenery changing to their emotions.

Finally Kuruk spoke up once more, thanking the past life that stands before him. Though before he ends his connection, the colours around Yangchen grew grey. Even her own air nomad clothing where draining away before him quickly. Her own sadness was showing before him, regret. Kuruk sighs and takes a few steps towards Yangchen, he grabs her right wrist in a firm grip finding the pulse. His other hand grabs her left hand and places her palm on his forehead. Both their eyes glow, a sudden connection.

A flash shun, everything was clear and fresh once more. Yangchen squints adjusting to the sudden fast change around her. Familiarity waved over her, the spirit oasis. The green grass was soft while the air was warm around her. Gazing down to the sacred pool, her reflection was her younger teen self again. Patting at her face in awe and looking at her hands carried away, Yangchen didn’t notice the movement behind her until it’s presents touched her on the shoulder. The touch was gentle and yet strong at the same time, a touch she knew.

Jolting upright with a swift turn, her eyes widen with sudden tears forming. Kavik. He was standing there before her, his arm reached out still attached to her shoulder. His dumb smile again beaming at her along with a head tilt all to add to his handsomeness that everyone teased him about. Little sobs broke out making Kavik open his eyes and stop smiling, before he could ask on what the matter was Kavik was getting tackled too the ground with a tight hug.

The sobs grew loud into his chest, Yangchen was bawling. Gently with a huff, Kavik wrapped his arms around her in a snug hold to comfort his avatar. Her crying slowed by his support until she managed to breathe. A sign to Kavik that she was calming down until he felt her whole body brace itself. Kavik’s eyes flicked down upon her, “You have no idea how much I care, your annoyance, your dumb face, how much I-” a soft touch of his lips upon her head made Yangchen holt her confession. “I love you to” his own words made her look up at him. His embrace tightened more, his skin flustered red higher and higher to his ears.

His blush was something that she adored, with many of other things he did or had done only around her. And to his knowledge, he looked upon her again, along the bridge of her nose, cheeks and the tip of her ears where a soft pink. He’s never seen her blush like this before, yet they both where staring at each other now. Kavik moved his head down too her, a kiss though a quick one. His eyes closed shut that he was afraid of his own action, worried to open them again he felt Yangchen’s hands cup his face. A tiny kiss returned his. Her lips where soft and refreshing, the embodiment of air itself gracing his skin.

Inner peace grew then within her. The regret dwindling away like a wave of water washing away grime. Yangchen started to relax on Kavik. She shifted her head to the side hearing the beat of his heart, a rhythm that sounded like a lullaby that her sisters had sung to her at a young age. Kavik rested his head back into the soft grass of the oasis, embracing his avatar again and taking in their moment. To herself she thought; “Thank you Kuruk for this help. May my blessings be the wind in your sails”, Yangchen closed her eyes. As if sending her blessing away too the new Avatar who sent her to find her peace within the spirit world.

A breeze in the material world found its way to Kuruk. It was warm and gentle, a silent message of a thank you. Kuruk nodded from its passing and knew who’s blessing it was. Immediately Kuruk sat sail with Yangchen’s peace in his sails as he crossed the For Nations seas.

[starry-hughes]

or maybe some creep from the bar follows her and she just goes to mark or at least the house and asks to be let in

i like this idea. she shows up to their just bawling and scared begging for mark. someone lets her in and she’s shaking and won’t talk to anyone unless it’s mark cause it’s the only person she trusts rn

dakota is having a shit night. her professor and department head called her into an office for an impromptu meeting. “dakota, we aren’t sure the scholarship you have will be funded again for the upcoming semester. the donor hasn’t decided yet. but we wanted you to be aware.”

they go on about her writing a statement to the donors of how this scholarship affects her. she feels numb when she leaves. she can’t even call mark to cry.

she picks up the additional shift for the night since needing the money is on her mind. she’s basically in panic mode, thinking that she’s going to have to take the next semester off. her whole future plan is going to be thrown off.

dakota can’t call her family and ask for help. she’s distracted the whole night. she didn’t even realize that the guy at the end of the bar has been watching her. “kota, go home, you’re making it gloomy here, plus it’s late,” her manager says so she clocks out and shoves her tips into her bag.

her studio apartment is close for walking. but the guy at the end of the bar who could definitely get the upper hand on her is following. her heart is beating out of her chest, and she tells herself to turn right. she picks up her walking pace and lets her brain take over.

dakota doesn’t realize what she’s doing until she’s knocking on the door of the house. she’s crying when ethan opens the door, shaking and a babbling mess. “i need mark.”

he eyes the guy down the road and pulls her inside. “dakota calm down,” he tells her but she’s bawling. “i need mark.”

mark is on the couch when he hears her crying and gets up. dylan is telling him not to go over there to see her. “mark,” dakota sobs aloud when she sees him. mark is stiff as she hugs him but her knees are shaking so bad he’s convinced she’s going to collapse. “there was some guy following her, he is waiting down by the stop sign, waiting for her to leave,” ethan explains.

“i don’t want to be alone at home right now please i’m scared. and i don’t have money for next semester and-”

“what?” mark finally says. ethan and dylan get the hint to leave. “dakota you have to calm down,” mark tells her, “jesus you’re shaking still. let’s go to my room.”

“mark,” ethan warns. ethan and dylan are still upset with dakota but they weren’t just going to kick her out. “i’ve got it,” he mumbles, ignoring his friends warnings.

[carmenized-onions]

these are my thoughts

-the amish story?? we're starting with the amish story???? so you want me to bawl my fuckin eyes out, is that? i hate you onion.

-its been 0ERR minutes. damn right. feel the burn carmen berzatto, feel it!!!

-i actually had to switch tabs and play the countries of the world quiz cuz ohhhh my god carmy talking to chef david is never an easy pill to swallow

-mikey called me? i have been officially adopted into the family? im all warm inside. but as a middle child, i am offended. deeply. we also care for people and have to like keep the peace! also ouch, id feel so guilty as a baby getting the big bro attention when the big bro's actually baby is being left on read.

-oh shit oh shit we're back ahhhhhhhh please chef david/carmy needs multiple warnings. also so real so real so real receiving praise from someone who always criticized you is not as sweet as you thought it would be. actually somewhat repulsive.

-i mean,,,, great introspection there carm, but maybe like 0ERR minutes too late buddy

-"The only fuckin’ good thing in my life" ....okay maybe i change my vote and i support tony folding. im folding.

-“Hey asshole—” Richie stops, when he sees David. “Ah. You’re needed, Chef Carmen.” dont back down richie dont back down call him out in front of the stupid exec he put over everyone else. also did you notice in season three no one said 'cousin' once? not onceeeeee. carm deserved it, but damn did it hurt. please heal me onion

-“Want your coffee?” He corrects, like stroking your ego will make you fold. It does. ehehehehehe yeah yeah ill do itt

-fuck me this is dark.

-“Cousin get my fucking bag, now!” she called him cousin.

-ummmm can this be an x richie jerimovich now actually?

-carmen is definitely the joke. i know im tony, but id be on my hands knees for her too.

-onion. “And no one wants you to acknowledge that you’re the guy— Like you can take the compliment, but you can never say ‘I know, I’m doing it on purpose.’” how have you managed to capture the human experience of being the dependable people pleaser into words and such good words????? i could only wish to be as good at writing as you are. profession well chosen.

-'You laugh, and it quickly turns into a groan as you try to come up with something. “I uh… Oh! I fuckin’ hate the nickname ‘Jack’, that’s something.” “Oh?” He leans forward, teasingly intrigued— You’ve thrown him a bone, because you’re the guy, too. He’s able to focus on this in lieu of himself.' ahahahah i knew this was coming, if she liked jack it would've stayed jack but noooo its chip! i been waiting for this one, turn it up! also yes so 'the guy' of her, turning the convo to you only to help out the other guy cuz the guy never wants to be the center of attention unless its actively helping someone out ugh i love you onion

-i think im gonna try to minimize the comments, its like ive got one after every sentence, jeez cool it dude.

-sydmikey crossover kind of , wow. its hitting me. i wonder what they wouldve been like together.

-'and neither of you know this is a lie, yet.' actually fuck you onion.

-shit forgot the richie carmy fight was happening right out the window???????????????????????????

-lol. bear in the freezer 1.0

-you're making me miss mikey even tho im reading mikey but damn i miss my bestie and he should be enjoying the bear with us rn (even tho the bear is shit rn 0ERR but like if it wasnt)

-“If that’s what getting a star takes, I don’t want it.” oh fuck. us squidink truthers out here winning.

-'Richie’s a good dad. You will never find a good time to tell him this.' i know what you're referencing and i despise you for it. tony will tell him.

-'“Yeah, well you need to read Mark Wolynn’s ‘It Didn’t Start With You.’” Richie’s got lists of books now, instead of zingers. They somehow hit harder.' they hit very hard my man, very hard. #teamfuckeveryonebutrichie

read the rest so quick that i felt like i lived it. i hate you. you write so well. my best friend died dude ,you gave me a best friend who knew me and saw me and you killed him???

those are my thoughts. ive been reading this on an off since 10am, it is now almost 5pm. i was meant to be studying. truly the best form of procrastination is reading your work. i hope my review, tho lacking, it welcomed.

-jude the dude <3

So fun fact before we get into this, I am currently at my parents house packing all of my shit because I move into my apartment next thursday!! Thank y’all for being patient w/ me. I would fucking love to get the next chapter out tommorow (and answer all my asks) but we’ll see. I really need to prioritize packing but I,,,,, don’t want to. 

So now as my form of break I’m answering asks between boxes LMAO. SO ANYWAYS LETS FUCKING YAP FOR A WHILE!!~

(also please continue to send in essays, I've got quite the backlog if you're worried I didn't get it!! I probably maybe did!! Just busy fucking couple weeks)

I was so excited to do “what are you amish” as an opener, the doc was literally named ‘amish’ in google docs. I knew it was gonna shoot everyone dead on impact. Speaking of doc names, you ever wonder what the docs of these chapters are named?

(mushy potato is still chapter 13 I just had edited it a lot and made a new guy) I’m a little unhinged. 

Anyways FEEL THAT BURN CARMY BABY!! This was such a distressing chapter. I think it only adds to the stress to have those really sweet (mostly) moments with Mikey and then go into actually on the fucking brink with Carmen. 

I APOLOGIZE TO ALL MY MIDDLE SIBLINGS!! I think we babies and middle kids should team up tbh to beat Older Sibling’s ass. Middle/Babies are 100% also taking weight on our shoulders and I feel like this is never appreciated, so I wanted to have Tony be a baby, cause it goes against that type of a Baby Sib never being the dependable one. 

I love my middle brother dearly though. I think I see trio siblings fall into the categories of

Oldest - On a hierarchy level, emotionally responsible for everyone. 

Middle - Often financially/emotionally responsible, keeps family connected.

Baby - On a personal level responsible for emotions! One-on-One dynamics, yknow?

At least, that’s where my family and coincidentally the Berzattos seem to fall. I have to stop yapping about this let’s MOVE ONNN

SOOO REAL to get praise and not feel good. It’s so wild. It’s such a wild experience to get the praise you always wanted from someone and then realize immediately oh what the fuck i don’t give a fuck what you think and quite frankly i should’ve never been trying to impress you?? It’s such a weird human experience. Can a psychology major explain this to me. 

0ERR MINUTES TOO LATE LMAOOOO— But yeah, from what I noticed, some seemed to fold after seeing how fucked the rest of Carmen’s Friday went. I feel like it also completely changes the feeling of Something to Do. Should I do a poll again? Actually no I wanna do a different poll hold on…

RICHIE! NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER WHAT? NEVER GIVE UP!!! I did notice the lack of cousin in S3, which completely made sense and hurt deeply, however I live in a world where I wanted everyone to at least a little bit understand each other. 

-ummmm can this be an x richie jerimovich now actually?

This is the poll I wanna do. Because I’ve seen a lot of RiChip or SquidInk truthers coming to the light. What the fuck would Mikey’s ship name be actually? Mikchip? McRib. What? 

You had me blusshinn with quoting the guy scene!! Thank you for saying so. I was fucking tweaking like ‘is anyone going to understand what the fuck i mean when i’m saying this or do i just need to go to therapy’. Turns out we all do. So. That’s good. THANK YOU!! I 

WAITTIN FOR THIS ONE!! CHIP ORIGINS!! I was considering having the Chip origin be another scene that would essentially be ‘off screen’ but it just felt so apt to do here. I actually had an entire other conversation planned for Mikey/Chip to have here but it just didn’t suit them. I’m so glad I went with this. And aufgh, my heart… It was always so fucking sad for me while writing this and switching back and forth between scenes and being like “GOD I DON’T WANNA GO BACK TO CARMEN/MIKEY ERA” they were both very difficult to write for different reasons. But going back to Carmen was always tough cause it was like oh yeah. Mikey’s dead by this one. And he’s not suddenly gonna come out and give someone a painful back massage. This SUCKS!!

I cooked with neither of you know this is a lie, yet. Everyone knows I caramelized the shit out of that one. 

More people need to fight in front of the restaurant. I want those bitches on STAGE. It’s so much more fun when it’s public and weird. 

Now are we a squidink truther or richip gang affiliate we have to choose one jude or are we doing a polycule because i dont know if that’s possible

LISTEN BE HONEST WHEN IS THERE A NORMAL TIME TO GO UP TO YOUR FRIEND AND BE LIKE “hey i think you’re a great father” WHAT? WHAT? I’D start fucking tweaking (crying in public), personally.

All the book reccs were brought to you by my family doctor prescribing them to me. I literally have them on a sticky note next to me. Shout out Dr V! Love you baby!! #teamfuckeveryonebutrichieanddrV

The last scene was very much so my full deep dive into time distorted grief poetry, which I fucking loved doing so thank you to everyone who enjoyed it (you!!). Bro, getting to the end was so hard because I also fell in love with best friend Mikey writing it and I was like man,,,, does he have to die though,,, can we like,,, make him into a marvel superhero or something and pivot genres?? I hate this,,, So listen Mr Storer killed him I just poured a fuck ton of salt in the wound. 

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR REVIEW, ALWAYS FEEL FREE TO SEND IN MORE THOUGHTS I LOVE TO GET THEM IT’S NEVER LACKING!!! Back to packing I go. I think I’ll tackle the desk next? Wish me luck brothers.

[sainotavailable]

pairings — Venti, Kazuha, Wanderer, Xiao, Kaeya, and Al-Haitham x gn!Reader

summary — You checked your pantry and wow! You don't have shit besides spiders chillin' in the corner of the cabinet. It's time to shop, and your s/o wants to go with you (or in Al-Haitham's case, you drag him along). Would he behave himself and is he OK to bring to society?

tags / warnings — crack / fluff / HCs, almost all of them are insane. kazuha is HIGH ASF, wanderer is an asshole (canon), venti and kaeya have crippling alcoholism, PDA, established relationship, please stop taking these men outside.

A/N — this is my first post. i'm sorry you had to read it but i just write stupid crack hc's or weird shit. also i'm crying because tumblr deleted the first draft i was gonna post. absolutely in tears rn.

Venti “Huh, you’re going to the market? Can I come, can I come!?”

As soon as you step foot into the market, expect him to dash in front of you in search for wine. If you’re in another nation or they’re sold out of his favorite booze, he will drop to his knees and BAWL (but it sounds rly pretty cuz he’s a good bard yk like a disney princess)

you urge him to stand up because he’s being embarrassing and that just makes him roll around on the dirty ass floor because he’s a fucking drama king. legit doing it to spite you even tho you didn’t do shit. however once he recovers he’ll…

put random shit into the basket (no he doesn’t need it he just thinks maybe in the future one of u might. please take it out)

will buy plastic bendy straws so he can drink his alcohol in a silly goofy way

will find a way to eat more than 1 free sample at the food stalls (has a fake mustache for this occasion)

if he finds wine that’s rly expensive he will attempt to seduce you into purchasing it for him (dont feed into his alcoholism)

will try to go into the basket (even if its handheld)

expect him to serenade you the entire time you're shopping, too

also he will hold ur hand and just be all over u. he loves u sm <3

will complain once he gets tired (its only been 10 minutes)

overall, terrible to bring. leave him at home

Kazuha “Oh, have we run out of goods? May I accompany you?”

As you shop, you kind of forget he’s even there until he picks something up to take a closer look and makes a comment. He mostly just chills and follows you around. But…

he actually might be high

how many nakuweeds did u have before you two left? did u count???

all of a sudden he’s adding random snaccs to the basket. when did he ever eat this shit?

as you watch him stuff a dozen doughnuts into ur basket that’s when u realize he might have some crazy munchies. maybe u should ask??

actually maybe not he looks really out of it. he ated all the weeds

as you try and put away some of the shit he put in you see him staring at the local cats

he doesn't know wtf is going on

you should probably go back home now

overall, probably fine to bring with you when he’s not high as a kite

Wanderer “Where are you going? To the market? . . . I better go with you—no, not because I want to, but because you’ll get that generic store brand shit.”

He’s mad and he doesn’t wanna be there, but bc you’re such an asshole who buys generic great value tea. anyways even tho he looks really mad, he doesn’t mind being with you (what a shit) will wander (heh) away from you and look at other stuff. if u try and contain him he’ll get pissy about it and insist he’s an independent puppet-man and he’s not gonna commit tomfoolery anymore. anyways so…

he doesn’t care if ur trying to save mora, he WILL have his namebrand inazuman tea!!!

maybe he won’t… because he understands prices are very tough right now. BUT its not because you told him to, you fucking box

gets PISSED and will become a karen if the cashier doesn’t say hi to him

our boy is toxic and i will not fluff him down this is just him and u like it

will slap your hand if you try and hold his hand. like, not hard. but like, the way a cat slaps your hand when its tired of you petting it.

will hold ur hand if u try a second time but his grip is rly tight cause bro is always tense asf

overall, don’t bring him if you like the store/market you’re going to. you might get banned

Xiao “You’re going to the market? I see . . . It’s getting dark out, so I’ll come with you.”

You know he’s anxious about being around so many people, but he wants to protect you <3<3 so he’ll overcome this obstacle and follow you around like a lost puppy…

actually he’s really close

like holy shit back up xiao, he’s right against ur back

you dont bother to say anything bc yk he’ll say some shit like “YOU HAVE NO RESPECT FOR THE ADEPTI”

actually maybe you should grab his hand because he legit looks like a deer in headlights

will hold ur groceries for you bc he’s so strong <3

u can't hold his hand because he's holding his giant fucking polearm "just in case" and holding your bags in the other, so maybe hold his arm??

he loves that shit even if he doesnt admit it

might suddenly leave with ur groceries if he’s called or some shit, will return with torn bags but its ok he did everything he could to fix it!

by fix it i mean now he’s just holding everything and pierced it into his spear

you should just be happy he has everything. don’t comment on it

overall, 10/10. besides the anxiety, he likes being near you even if he doesnt admit it. ur groceries are safe with him just like you are <3<3

Kaeya “Groceries? Oho, well. I have some time, why don’t I go with you? You’ll need a big strong captain to carry all your bags, after all.”

Even if you didn’t want to bring him, he’s coming with you anyways. I think the best part about Kaeya is he’ll stick by your side throughout the trip to the market and follow you around wherever you go.

Honestly, out of everyone else, it feels like he might be the best one to bring with you…

plez expect him to have an arm slung over your shoulders or snaked around your waist. he loves pda!

EXCEPT! he is the KING OF CONSENT(tm) he will only do it if you say its ok! what a sigma chad wtf

i hope you like talking because kaeya fucking loves chatting while shopping. he will not be quiet for long even if you tell him to stfu

even if you’re not the chatty type and you’re pretty quiet, he’ll talk for you. about his day, what he did that morning (even if u already know), what he’s gonna do later, he will not leave a single detail out.

hey btw remember when i said he won’t leave ur side? i lied. don’t trust anyone on the internet.

he will 100% leave your side for the booze market. he is more interested in imported wine that he can get his hands on

will return to you with 6 bottles and insist they’re for you both to share. please stop feeding into his alcoholism

he will carry your bags btw. all of them. he will have both arms packed with bags and won’t complain, might just tease you a little tho.

overall, a fantastic man to bring with you to grocery shop. can protect u cuz he’s a strong cavalry captain who will hold ur belongings without complaint. just feed him booze <3<3

Al-Haitham “. . . Fine, I’ll go with you to pick up some things. I need to pick up a new book to take to work, anyway.”

The moment you enter the marketplace, you most likely will never find your partner again. At least, not until later in your shopping trip. He literally disappeared, where the fuck did he go?

Its only half way through that you find him and see him sitting on one of the benches, flipping through the new book he purchased. You call for him, but his soundproof earpieces are in effect. You snatch the book out of his hands to get his attention and bother him enough to follow you. He lets out a sigh, but gets up anyway…

u rly should’ve left him there cuz he’s so quiet. he might still have his earpieces on.

he’ll follow you around by your side and he’ll hold your bags, too. he’s got big strong arms for a fuckin reason!!

half way through he’ll start reading his book again, sorry but shopping is rly boring to him ok

al-haitham isn’t a pda person btw don’t touch him

might hold ur hand.

will hold ur hand if the cashier is too sus for his liking

maybe

if you run into kaveh while shopping he will leave. if ur holding hands he will leave with u even if u didnt pay for ur shit yet.

overall, um. he’s definitely an option. he’ll hold ur bags??? he just wants to go back home

[blueberryarchive]

Your writing is so hauntingly beautiful it makes me want to shrivel up in a corner and bawl my eyes out with my head in my hands. Your writing reminds me of bruised knees, wounded knuckles and popsicles. I love it so much. <3

baby...im drunk rn and i might just cry bc of you, thank you so much for telling me that. my writing has been feeling so pathetic lately.

god I wish I could hug you for saying those words.

thank u, i hope i can keep making good things for u anon

[i-arch-my-backula]

“You’ll always be my pretty boy”: Eddie Munson x ftm reader

It seems like if you want a Eddie x reader that isn’t smut or x fem reader you have to do it yourself. I like to be open about this stuff and y’all probably know I’m not doing the best rn. I’ve had like major dysphoria ongoing for like two weeks now. I’ve been getting a lot of support from you guys and I really appreciate that. I’m more writing this for myself I guess. I just need to be held rn so yeah. Also I know I said I’d be like recovering from getting my wisdom teeth out but you can pry my laptop out of my cold dead hands. I hate how short it is but I can’t come up with anything better. 

Warnings: Talk of dysphoria, strong language, bit of an unstable reader

Eddie picked up that something was wrong a good bit ago. You told him you were ok and that you’re just a bit anxious. He saw how you avoided mirrors and wore baggier, longer clothes despite the warm weather. He noticed how you spoke less and tried to deepen your voice more. He’s worried but you just won’t open up. He’s seen you start to crack slowly. Today was finally the day things fully broke.

You took a look in his bathroom mirror. You focused in on how feminine your features really are. How round and chubby your face is, how your eyes don’t seem quite right, how your jawline is so soft you can’t even see it. How no matter how tight you binded or how loose your clothes were, a feminine shape still fell over you. It was the last straw. You wiped away tears and walked back out to Eddie’s room. You stood in the doorway watching him look through some of his tapes. He sees your watering eyes and sets down the tapes. “Are you ok baby?”  Those words set something off in you. He’s asked it countless times before so why is it so different now? Not being able to hold back anymore you just fell to your knees bawling your eyes out. 

Eddie hesitated for a moment before quickly helping you up and getting you to his bed. He sat you on his lap and help you to his chest as you cried into his band shirt. “Hey honey it’s ok it’s ok? Just let me know whats wrong darling. I’m here to help.” He rubs your back and lets you cry into him. As the tears started to slow you moved your head to make your voice less muffled. 

“I just wanna be a pretty boy Eddie. I wanna be a pretty boy like you. I hate how round my face is and how my hips bulge in any pants I wear. How big my chest always seems to be. I hate hearing my voice. I just wanna be a pretty boy like you,” You continue to sob, gripping onto the back of his shirt for dear life. But he doesn’t mind. Eddie simply holds you there and lets you sob it all out. “I just want to be a pretty boy.” 

“You are a pretty boy Y/n,” He says once you’ve calmed down a bit, “You’ve always been a pretty boy. Since the day I’ve laid my eyes on you I’ve known you’re such a pretty pretty boy,” Eddie tilts your chin to make you look at him now, “You’ll always be my pretty boy.” He wipes away your tears and presses a kiss to your lips. You sniffle. 

“You promise Eddie?” He nods. 

“I promise. I swear I’d love you no matter what.” 

“Even if I was cis? Would I still be a pretty boy?” 

“Of course honey. Trans or not you’re my pretty boy.” You sigh and put your head on his chest. Eddie leans back and you shut your eyes. 

“I love you Eds.” 

“I love you too Y/n.” You two laid there in silence until you fell asleep, Eddie following soon after you too. 

[edengarden]

Ushijima, Kageyama and Lev who's Soldier!S/O decided to surprise their beloved by coming back to Japan during their birthday after years of seperation? I've been watching those 'soldiers coming home to their families' compilations and my ass will nOt stop bawling at them

Why do you torture yourself like that omg

Ushijima

When you surprised him, sort of just standing there. So overwhelmed by your presence. He can’t wrap his head around the fact that you’re THERE

As soon as you speak to him or approach him though he’ll engulf you in the warmest hug 🥺🥺 I bet Ushiwaka gives the BEST hugs

It lasts so long too, mostly bc he really, really really missed you

Let him revel in the nice surprise. His best friend lives in France and his lover’s in the army. Mans having a hard time rn

HE WANTS TO SPEND SO MUCH QUALITY TIME WITH YOU but chances are he still has other commitments bc you took him by SURPRISE

Speaking of, he can’t fathom why you didn’t tell him. It’s so illogical of you to just,, show up?? And he had nothing planned for you two?? You better make it up to him he’s so upset by it

Kageyama

HE DIDNT MEAN IT BUT THE FIRST THING HE SAID WAS “what are you doing here?”

Hits hard, god I hope you didn’t take that too harshly

He went in for the hug hella quickly bc he didn’t want you to see the tears that started to well up in his eyes.

And when you do notice he’s straight up denying it but we all know it’s so sweet of him :’)

He rlly missed your scent and it shows by the way he’s got his face buried in your hair (if you’re as tall/taller it’s gonna be your neck lmao)

Wants to sit down and listen to you talk!! He missed talking in person with you so much. And no he does not mind being silent to allow you to tell all the stories you want

He won’t understand half of them but it’s all good, we love that he’s trying

Always initiating some sort of physical contact, whether it be sitting with an arm around your shoulders, hand on your knee, holding your hand, etc… it’s just refreshing that you’re home!!

Lev

HE’S SO EXCITED THAT YOURE HOME!!!

Dropped everything to make sure you two could spend time together. He didn’t even want to make the phone calls bc he’d rather talk to you but you made him do it

Cannot let you go. He’s all smiles and giggles and a few stray tears but he couldn’t care less bc his lover’s home!!!

Cuddles. You better cuddle him because he’s STARVED for it. And tell him all the funny stories!! And all the gossip too

Like two hours after you got home he’s already dreading the day you’ll have to go back. Whether it’s in three days or three weeks he’s upset by it

But he’s also still so happy you’re back :’)) poor thing he’s all confused by his feelings

Bunch of couples pictures got taken while you were back. He wants to make more memories he can cherish while you’re away!!

[tigerplushh]

^^^ me rn

HEE HEE GIGGLE IM HAPPY IT MADE U INSANE :333 i MIGHT be projecting when i say stsg x aroace/intimacy issues reader is my fav (closely followed by childhood friends to lovers teehee) but :333 IM SO GLAD YOU SEE THE VISION!!! WE R CONNECTED TRUST!!!!! ughhh and the doing everything u would in a normal relationship but not having a label for it… AUGHH… and dare I say that childhood friends trope and intimacy issues/aroace reader trope go hand in hand… especially with sugu GIGGLES SOO HARD EHSHFHE. But oh em gee I cannot explain how badly reader and sugu by the sea is my favourite thing ever sniffles so hard <//333 YOURE SO RIGHT WHEN U SAY SUGU NEEDS SOMEONE TO UNDERSTAND AND LIKE. EMPATHISE WITH. YOU ARE SOSOSOSO RIGHT I feel like this would be such an important thing for him because he’s always looking out for the people he holds dear but him having a meaningful connection with someone whether the line between platonic and romantic is blurred or not is such a sugu thing eugheheuhhh.. it’s why I love the childhood friends trope so much like I personally think suguru is the type to absolutely adore someone that he’s got that strong of a bond with and it would put him at peace sooo much that he not only understands them fully but they understand him right back 😞😞😞😞 maybe that’s because I’m like 100% sure in my mind sugu is Demiromantic in a way. Yeahhh tell him you’re there for him and allow there to be an unspoken understanding that you get him and he’s on his knees with a ring in his hand REAL!!!!!

“He’s your pillar and you’re his anchor.” OHHH KILL ME NOW!!!! DROPS TO MY KNEES AND STARTS CHOKING ON MY OWN SOBS THIS IS SOSOSOSO TRUE TO ME. I’m gonna pretend I didn’t clutch my chest and gasp in awe after reading that eueueheujuj…. I will always take the chance to ramble on Abt my faves and my fav tropes sniffle snorfl…. Guys I’m gonna be very honest I think they could fix me eueheuehuehyerhhrhdhheuhhhh 💔💔 yeah honestly I cannot blame you at all for loving sugu if u couldn’t tell already I am completely and utterly enamoured with him YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!

Giggles I KNOWWW this is about aroace/intimacy issues reader but I honestly need to take the opportunity I have to yell about how much I love childhood friends to lovers AND AND THE FIC U WROTE ABOUT IT WITH SUGU. starts bawling look away look away!!!!!!!!! n e ways it’s not even fully relevant to the childhood friends trope but everyone seems to talk about how being “friends” (wink wink) with satoru would involve a lot of physical affection BUT!!!! I think that would be the same for sugu but more privately and a lot more gently. I think physical affection with satoru would be more like spontaneous bone crushing hugs and excited kisses on ur cheek or forehead (and probably him picking u up and twirling you around because honestly it’s satoru gojo we’re talking about here) and physical affection with suguru is more like gentle hand kisses and hugs from behind or patting your head/tucking your hair behind your ear…. :3 augh and when u got the anon about reader being cheated on and then sugu crawling in beside them for comfort HHHRRRRGGGHRHRRG he would be so perfect to hug this is the bit where nobody contradicts me and the crowd jumps to their feet and starts cheering because YEAHHHH SUGU SUGU SUGU SUGU HUGS YEAHH!!! 🔊🔊🔊🔊🔊🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

ALSOOO…. while I may be projecting I do have a lot of aroace/queer hcs for jjk characters hehehdherrf obviously. Sugu my demiromantic bicoded princess… satoru I’m not very sure I feel like he’d be pan. Like he doesn’t strike me as the type to care much for gender or looks or presentation all he needs is someone to talk to and someone to love and to love him just as much hehehdheshdh. I think shoko is bi too though I’m very tempted to put her on the ace spectrum somewhere :33 and obviously kenny the silly… my genderfluid romantically/sexually unlabelled gf… apologies but I don’t think there is a single non queer person in jjk they’re all a little fruity in their own way I think. Maybe even mahito thinks about kissing boys sometimes I wouldn’t know

hops off to the corner like a jerboa hides my face this turned out wayyy longer than I intended it to be and I got a bit carried away at the end cough cough hope u don’t mind ANYYYWAYYYYSSSSSS LOOKING FORWARD TO THE SICK SATORU FIC EHEHDWHDH HOPE U HAVE A LOVELY TIMEZONE THANK U FOR FEEDING THE STSG NATION PER USUAL

I don’t know if it’s just because I’m aroace myself or because it’s the effect your writing has on me but stsg x aroace reader has been on my mind NONSTOP 😭 what have you done to me. This is literally just my idea and take on it feel free to ignore my silly little ramble I’m actually insane <33

I feel like dynamics where there’s some obstruction of sorts from it being just a regular happy healthy relationship is my fav ever because. It means there’s so much more yearning and pining involved and it’s so much more emotional I LOVE ITTTAUGHH and aroace spec reader is a great example of that. I feel like the main kinda reasoning (“obstruction”) would be how reader views the relationship they have with stsg and how they feel about it, the way it’s supposed to be just a regular platonic friendship but there’s so much unaddressed care and deep rooted love (that maybe reader doesn’t want to address) and it’s just a confusing mess of emotions. Reader being hesitant to accept that maybe it’s more than just a friendship because they aren’t 100% sure what those complex feelings that undoubtedly come with being ‘friends’ with stsg are. AND aside from aroace reader, a reader with intimacy/trust/abandonment issues or trauma that hasn’t been unpacked (take your pick!!) while it is the same kinda theme (basically just reader’s hesitance to have to face and attempt to understand their own emotions) it’s just. AUGH!! It’s such a yummy idea to me there are so many scenarios. Maybe reader just doesn’t want to be helped or is too untrusting/scared to open themselves up and be vulnerable with people again, is kinda introverted maybe, just generally like. Lost. almost as if they don’t really have a place anywhere? They don’t feel particularly special and they’re just painfully conscious of their own negative emotions + their own loneliness?? Are you seeing what I’m seeing. The type of person that could be in a room full of people and still not feel any less alone. In a way they’re a lot like sugu!!! OHHH HOW IT WOULD BREAK SUGUS HEART I ALREADY HAVE A VISION!!!! Him seeing himself in reader. Dear lord. The understanding that bond would create and him slowly coaxing reader into becoming more emotionally open because he gets it, sugu is so special because there’s an unspoken understanding between him and reader that they’re kindred spirits. as I’m writing this I am literally imagining reader and sugu sitting by the sea late at night. The sea is where lost doomed people that are overwhelmed by their own grief belong!!!! Can you hear my heart shattering and can you tell how much I love angst 😇😇😇 takes a deep sigh and leans back in my expensive chair as I dramatically overlook the city below me. Another day of being a stsg fan forcing everyone else to suffer with me because nobody in the jjk fandom will ever feel joy again

OLLIE MY DEAREST ohhhhh reading this made me so :(((( so so emotional AND I AGREE COMPLETELY what if i told you this is literally exactly what i had in mind………… we’re so connected fr

(this got Very long 😭😭 you have been warned!!)

FIRST OFF it’s crazy that you specifically mention The Sea bc !!!!! when i thought of the aroace!reader stsg fic i immediately envisioned them sitting by the sea under the stars :> i might’ve mentioned that but i don’t Think i did …… IT REALLY IS THE PERFECT PLACE FOR LOST SOULS DOOMED SOULS GRIEFSTRICKEN SOULS ETC ETC IT’S TRUE IT’S TRUEEEE i think it’s perfect for sugu/reader especially !!! T_T more on that later tho…

but okok let’s get into this I’M OVERJOYED THAT YOU’RE INTO AROACE!READER/STSG BTW I THINK IT’S SUCH A TASTY CONCEPT ….. from one aspec to another i am equally insane abt them i just. think there’s so much potential there…..

some of the things i love writing about most are 1) the blurry lines between platonic/romantic love (one of my gojo fics was actually written w a qp relationship in mind :33) and 2) the difficult parts of love/the fear of intimacy in general… it’s something i like exploring because it’s interesting + i don’t see it in fanfic often and. idk!! i just think it’s important to me that i depict a kind of love that’s very tender and healing and careful. especially since i literally only write for characters who have intimacy issues themselves LMAO

I feel like dynamics where there’s some obstruction of sorts from it being just a regular happy healthy relationship is my fav ever because. It means there’s so much more yearning and pining involved and it’s so much more emotional I LOVE ITTTAUGHH

LITERALLY THIS you put it so perfectly ollie.. T_T love with obstructions is alwaysss most interesting to me …. AND I AGREE!! if i ever end up writing this fic the focus will definitely be on reader and how they view love!! being on the spectrum is genuinely so isolating sometimes and i feel like that’s comparable to the kind of isolation stsg carry with them :’3 none of you can fully understand the others’ individual hardships but with a lot of understanding and respect i think it would go well.

… honestly i hc both gojo and geto as being on the spectrum themselves LMAO but maybe i’ll avoid those hcs to make the fic more interesting 😭😭 ace demiromantic gojo + demisexual sugu are soooo real to me they’re my pookies <333

it’s supposed to be just a regular platonic friendship but there’s so much unaddressed care and deep rooted love (that maybe reader doesn’t want to address) and it’s just a confusing mess of emotions.

OLLIE I SWEAR WE’RE CONNECTED THROUGH THE AROACE HIVEMIND BC THIS WAS EXACTLY MY THOUGHT PROCESS TOO 😭😭😭 it’s just such a tasty scenario because i feel like stsg would be in denial about their feelings at first, but then (once they’ve come to terms with it!!) approach reader immediately… i kinda pictured it as stsg already being a couple, and then confessing to reader with the hope of them joining their relationship……… and it’s so difficult because reader doesn’t really know where their feeling lies between platonic and romantic, don’t really care about the specifics, they just know that they love them and cherish them but now they feel pressured to put a label on it and i think that would just make them panic.

and it’s not at all intentional on stsg’s side !!! they’re half expecting reader to reject them, but they’re just so sincere and tender about the confession. and i think that they just won’t be able to understand reader’s feelings even when they try to explain it :’3 because reader does like them. love them. but they don’t know if it’s romantic, and they don’t really want to know. and even if they knew for sure, they might not care for a standard relationship anyway!! it would just take a lot of understanding and support from stsg to even have that conversation without reader running away, but i think they’re both so gentle when it comes to you :(( they’re always willing to hear you out, and even if they don’t understand all the aspects of being aroace, that doesn’t mean they won’t support it.

…. tbh i’m not entirely sure how it’d work out 😭😭 i think it’d have to be kind of vague but i can picture the three of them living together, going grocery shopping and cuddling and whatnot, and there aren’t really any labels there. not for reader anyway. but they all love each other and that’s enough <33

i love how we both started ranting LMAO this concept just means a lot to me so i can’t help but ramble a bit T_T BUT BUT BUTTTTT we still need to talk abt stsg with a reader that has intimacy issues/unpacked trauma… ollie literally every single part of ur ask made me feel insane in the head this is another concept that means a lot to me and i’m SOOO excited that i get to talk abt it with you!!!! :’3 i think i’ve already said this plenty of times but i’ll die on this hill: stsg would be PERFECT for this kind of reader. so loyal and understanding and accepting. they’d be so, so patient because both of them really only care about your happiness!! that’s all!!!!

and tbh i feel like no matter what kind of issues reader has specifically, it all boils down to them having difficulties with vulnerability!! showing it and seeing it and just embracing it as something important and healing. AND that’s perfect for stsg because they’re literally the same LMAO…. and in this case i think that would benefit the relationship as a whole!! it’ll be bumpy at first because i feel like all three of you would encourage the other two to open up, express themselves etc — but then not return that vulnerability. and that just wouldn’t work out!! and i think that would force you to open up, if only so your partners will do the same. same for stsg!! and it’s just soooo tender and raw :(((( but so important!!

i can honestly imagine suguru having the most trouble opening up, even though he’ll be the most insistant that you and satoru do so 😭😭 he’s a big ol hypocrite is what i’m saying. but i can see him dipping his toes into that vulnerability for you, because he knows you won’t get anywhere otherwise and he wants to be a good example for you to follow. it’d make things so much easier for reader because they aren’t the only one who’s having difficulties !! it’s all three of you!! you’re all learning and growing and loving each other so delicately :’3

now on the topic of sugu….

OHHH HOW IT WOULD BREAK SUGUS HEART I ALREADY HAVE A VISION!!!! Him seeing himself in reader. Dear lord. The understanding that bond would create and him slowly coaxing reader into becoming more emotionally open because he gets it, sugu is so special because there’s an unspoken understanding between him and reader that they’re kindred spirits.

THIS THIS THISSSSS OLLIE OUR BRAINS ARE HOLDING HANDS YOU GET IT YOU GET ITTT this is SUCH a great scenario AND IT’S SO REAL TOO… i think sugu would be the mvp in helping reader (NO DISRESPECT TO SATORU i think he would be vital in other ways!!) because like you said!! they’re the same. there’s something so soft and tender in that dynamic :’3 them talking by the sea… about their own loneliness and difficult pasts……. i 100% hc sugu as having had a rough childhood so if reader also did it’d just strenghten their connection even further. i think that what suguru needs more than anything else is understanding, so to receive that from reader, while also being able to give it in return……. yeahhhh. he’s whipped. you’d be talking by the sea looking up at the stars and he would already be thinking of marriage LMAO he’s such a sap to me 😭😭😭 he just has this moment when he realizes that he wants to Protect You Forever and it’s so special to him. he’s your pillar and you’re his anchor. (<- slowly spiralling as we speak I LOVE THIS MAN SO DEARLY…..)

OLLIIIIIEEEEEE THIS MADE ME FUCKING INSANE I’M SO SERIOUS I ALMOST CRIED both these concepts are so good T_T….. i can’t thank u enough for sharing them w me <333 YOU’RE ALWAYS WELCOME IN MY INBOX ILYSM!!!! i really feel like we see stsg the same way i swearrrr it’s the aroace hivemind…… anyway i am looking out at the city right with you………… drinking a glass of orange juice………… pondering stsg…………… they make me so sad/happy/other emotions that i don’t think human beings are supposed to feel 😔😔😔

[cloveroctobers]

Our baby going to prom prompt with jordan baker please 🥺🥺

From this prompt list

so I feel like his first born would be a little girl (which he predicted but initially wanted a couple of boys first...typical I know)

he’s extremely protective over his baby girl okay it doesn’t matter how old she gets he’s still gonna be that dad

Has a loving/goofy relationship with her, something he picked up from his own dad but he’s only serious when he feels like he needs to be

Chose her middle name since he wanted her first name to be “olive” but you weren’t having it. He tried to be creative by relating it to his twin but Olivia also agreed that the name kinda sucked but to compromise with Jordan you allowed it to be her middle name

he calls her “olly” instead of her first name

He wanted to be very active in this whole process while you were more easy-going about the whole ordeal but also just as excited as your little girl once the date started approaching

“They think they’re all cool now but wait until they see you in your dress, I bet $20 bucks they’ll be bawling like a baby.” Jordan whispered to your daughter who bumped her dad’s shoulder laughing with a shake of her head

“I can hear you, you know.”

“Do you have ears on the back of your head too?”

Jordan was very vocal about your daughter’s dress choices, giving his input of what he liked and what he didn’t like

“Honey, that compliments your skin so nicely but let’s talk about that neckline and one of your thighs is peeking out...”

Sure he might not agree with certain lengths or what was being shown but if it was something you really wanted he’d cave.

Anything for his little girl

“I’m gonna go broke before she’s married.” Jordan grumbled as the assistant carefully handled the dress

You laughed with your arms wrapped around Jordan’s waist, “you haven’t seen nothing yet. Ask my dad how much he paid for my wedding attire.”

Jordan threw his head back, “oh god!”

“Thanks dad!” Your daughter giggled running up to the both of you to wrap her arms around the pair to add to the embrace

“You’re welcome, little stinker.”

You did everything else far as the glitz and glamour bonding with your daughter and getting the latest teen gossip as always + some more info on your daughters prom date

You’ve already met the kid once or twice at the school and he was a nice kid as far as you were concerned

“Yeah he better be or I’ll have to call in some reinforcements to help get rid of the body.” Jordan huffed the night before prom as you lay in bed beside each other

“I don’t know about all that with the way your back is set up...”you laughed at the appalled look Your husband sent you

“I sure haven’t heard any complaints from you.” He argued as you entangled your legs together making Jordan flinch after he peeled his glasses off to lay on his nightstand, “always cold, aren’t you?”

“warm me up then.”

Jordan smirked as he lowered himself into the bed palming your cheek, “like I said, no complaints.”

The girls were upstairs as their dates waited outside in front of the house

Most of the parents were inside chatting away as you waited for the girls...well one out of the friend group was non-binary something Jordan was still trying to figure out but was still respectful towards the friend

they all took their time but it was common for your daughter to be dramatic she was into theatre after all

you had Olivia recording on the camcorder and Spencer on his cellphone to send the videos to all the friends and family that couldn’t be here

While you were acting like paparazzi getting all the angles of your daughter and then her friends then all together

“we can always count on you to make us look the best.” Your daughter said as you got up from the floor

You fixed your daughter’s hair after her poses, “you’re always stunning without even trying, my baby.”

Your daughter blew a raspberry until she noticed tears swimming in your eyes

“I mean she looks just like me so of course it’s effortless.” Jordan tossed an arm over your shoulders earning a laugh from some parents who listened in while they attended to their own children

Your daughter rolled her eyes, “I have the most extra parents.”

“Oh nooo, What gave that idea away?” Aunt Olivia sarcastically asked

Uncle Spencer added, “was it parent one trying to do parkour to get pictures or your dad threatening your date in the shed with his hardware tools?”

Your daughter whipped around to face Jordan along with your raised brow, “Dad, you didn’t.”

“I had to set some boundaries!! even the nerdy ones aren’t what they’ve seem. I’ve seen some tik toks you know?” Jordan defended while you placed a smile on your face bringing your daughter into your arms as you hid your sniffles

Your daughter and Jordan shared a glance

“I’ll give you $20 the day after tomorrow.” Your daughter tried to mouth

Jordan turned his eyes into slits, “what?”

Your daughter slapped one hand against her head before pulling back to smooth down your hair for reassurance

“You gonna be okay?”

“Stop growing! I’ll be fine! Let’s get some pictures of all of you with your dates before we send you off to live your lives!” You sighed waving everyone outside

“It’s just prom Mrs/Mr. Baker!” One of your daughters friend’s attempted to make you feel better

While their parent replied, “yeah but to us it’s like you’re already entering adulthood.”

The kids all groaned as they tracked down the steps to meet their dates who expressed how they liked their “fits”

All the parents snapped away and wishing them all to have fun

The parents thanked you for the hospitality and the wine/beer before taking their leaves promising to chat about the kids drama later on in the week

You were in full on tears ten minutes after watching your daughter ride off in the limo with Jordan cradling your head to his chest

Olivia and Spencer were completely confused

“Is this normal?” Olivia asked getting comfortable on the couch

Jordan patted your head, “I knew it was coming.”

“Shut up, mr. I’ll get rid of the body myself if I have to.” But it came out a lot less clear to Olivia and Spencer but Jordan understood your crying fits oddly

Olivia turned to Spencer who rested his hand against her knee

“You ready for kids?”

Olivia widened her eyes as you let out another dramatic sob and blew your nose against Jordan’s shirt who bit back a laugh, secretly making fun of you, which means this must have been love ‘cause high school Jordan would have thrown a fit if his significant other was using his shirt to deal with their emotions rn

“I think I can wait another year.” Olivia answered

Spencer eyed his in-laws over his shoulder as Jordan brought you over to the center of the living room to grab the baby book but decided to put it back down, “want to play olly’s favorite game: twister?”

“Her favorite game isn’t twister that’s mine! She loves charades.”

“Oh yeah,” Jordan’s mind went elsewhere before shaking those thoughts away, “...What about Jenga?”

“What about jenga?” You mocked, “next you’ll say it’s operation.”

Olivia didn’t want to interject and say it was actually “clue” so she watched the usual banter between the two parents glancing over at Spencer awaiting his answer

“Yeaaah I’m cool on that. Waiting a year sounds good to me.” He agreed watching as you pointed a finger into Jordan’s chest who scoffed at you and crossed his arms 

A/N: This was too cute/fun to write!! Thanks for requesting! we love dad Jordan! Why do I see him driving a dad car during the week like a Subaru and then bringing out the expensive cars on the weekend with his baby girl in the passenger seat screaming along to prince and new edition songs. Just imagine billy in the backseat along for the ride too. Woooow! The ideas. I love domestic fluff so much 😩💕

[osmpalliumduo]

murder au let's go let's go

Also, I think you've noticed, but I've continuously avoided using real names in all my works, even for Mumza, so George's name feels out of place.

--

When the trio reached school, they're met with an endless hallway of people whispering to each other, hunched over their phones with wide eyes and hands over their mouths.

It's been a while since the three touched upon social media, deciding to take a break from it to destress, so they're pretty much left in the dark.

It almost feels cinematic, walking down the corridor huddled together in confusion, and by the time they reached their lockers, they still haven't figured out what the word on the street is.

It's only when the PA system came on did they realize what this newfound commotion was about:

"Attention students, we're deeply saddened to announce the recent passing of George NotFound. We'll be paying respects in the school hall for assembly..."

They don't bother to listen to the rest of the announcement as sheer panic began shooting up each of their spines.

Tommy slams his locker shut too loud, jolting the other two and a few of the other students nearby, while Tubbo resists the urge to break into tears. Ranboo quickly pulls the two of them to the bathroom, just so he can take a break and breathe properly without his mask on in one of the cubicles.

When they reach the bathroom, double checking that it's empty, Ranboo darts into the furthest cubicle and pulls his mask down so he can take deep breaths. The other two can hear the lungful of gasps he's taking and they can almost hear the sound of him folding over to hug himself.

Tubbo finally breaks over the sink, bawling his eyes out in held back sobs and whimpers so it doesn't echo off of aged walls and porcelain.

"Calm down, guys, calm down," Tommy says, though his own hands are shaking and he's resisting the urge to punch the mirror. Techno and Wilbur are right, he's a bit dramatic, isn't he? "They only found out George was dead recently. He's been buried for, what, a week and a half already?"

"H-How did they even f-find him?!" Tubbo splashes water over his face so it isn't obvious that he's been crying - though his eyes remain puffy and red.

Ranboo is frighteningly silent except for the sound of breathing.

"I don't know. I'll have to check with someone later but...but they won't find out because we covered out tracks really well, didn't we?" Tommy reassures, bottom lip trembling. "I mean-I mean you and Ranboo thought of- thought of everything. Gloves, a trashbag over- over the body, covering the bottom of our shoes. It's literally no wonder you guys are so bloody smart."

"Tommy," Tubbo rubs at his eyes, heart still thumping loudly in his throat. He feels like puking. "Tommy, I'm scared."

"Do-Don't talk so loudly," Ranboo finally speaks, taking one last deep breath. He pushes open the door to reveal himself sitting over the lidded toilet bowl, elbows resting on his knees with his fingers buried in his hair. "Someone will hear you. We can talk about- about this later."

literally me rn ⬆️

BUT LIKE,,,, OH MY GOOOODDDD…. [SCREAMS AND BANGS TABLE MULTIPLE TIMES]

[littleaclove]

Character: Atsumu

my angst brain is at work rn so imma do some a n g s t y hcs starting with atsumu

-ok so this is when you die of some disease of your choosing

-this is all aged up and it may be ooc depending cuz i’m coming up with this on spot bUt uHm

-oK sO to get you started we’ll ease into it with this first one being that he comes visit you in the hospital all the time every day until they kick him out when visiting hours are over

-they may let him sleep in your room cuz he’s your boyfriend but not often cuz idk what it’s like in japan but here you can’t be in the room out of visiting hours unless it’s family or your spouse

-but you’ve been in there for a while and every time he comes visit you he brings you something that reminds him of you

-he also secretly buys another one for himself because he misses you and wants to have something to remind him of you

-he sneaks you food from like mcdonald’s or something once a week so you have something besides hospital food

-he’ll take time off practice and say he has a doctor appointment or something but he’s really going to see you cuz he misses you

-you decided to surprise him once by going to a game (with a nurse in case you pass out or something)

-he cried when he saw you there

-legit started bawling harder than when kita gave him the recovery gift basket thing

-he hugged you and gave you a forehead kiss

-that day was the best either of you ever had and the team was abouta cry too

-that day was emotional asf

-time skip to where you’re like r e a l l y sick more sick than you were before and have like a month-

-sO you and atsumu have been together for around 2-3 years and now especially with your illness he wants to do this before it’s too late

-so rn you can’t move from your bed you have so many things attached to you just so you can live another month

-atsumu was there for the whole day, which wasn’t expected cuz he had a game today but you appreciated him spending time with you

-mind you this is one of the first times he’s done this

-mid day you guys end up being in a really deep conversation about like what happens when you dO die

-so it’s about time for your lunch and he say he’ll be right back

-he comes back after like 10 minutes and you two start talking about normal couple stuff like his volleyball career or something that you like

-then your food gets brought in

-you start eating ____ (whatever you wanna eat cuz idk what to put) and then you were about to eat the dessert

-that’s when you see the ring that’s sticking out from the top of the dessert

-you look over to atsumu with the ring in hand and stare at him with a shocked expression

-he then kinda just takes the ring from you and gets down on one knee

-“y/n you are the best thing that’s ever happened to me and i want you to be with me until our time runs out. so, y/n, will you marry your s m e x y hot partner?”

-you roll your eyes at the last part but still start crying and say yes

-you guys spent the rest of the day planning how you’d do the wedding

-you two decide on someone coming to your room to wed the two of you

-so a week later a dude comes in and says all that stuff that they do at weddings and you two were from then on married

-time skip to your last day

-he cries like a baby and you tease him about it but at the same time you’re crying so you’re being a hypocrite

-he brings you all of your favorite things and makes everything perfect and special for you

-when you finally take your last breath he’s there holding your hand with his hand, both having the wedding rings on them

-he then kisses your hand and just cries then and there

-bawling his eyes out

ok that’s it cuz this hurt my heart

[tuffduff]

Dr. McKagan (Duff McKagan x Reader)

Pairing: fluffy Duff x Reader

Words: 1,387

Request: @onlyaxlrose​ “Maybe a Duff x Reader fic where he figures out she’s pregnant before she does, something fluffy lol”

A/N: Hello, I’m back~ this request is so cute, thanks hun! I hope all of you are doing okay, I know these times rn are hard and some of us might be dealing with more anxiety. I know I am. If any of you need anything, I’m always here and I love you all! 

“Can you please...just stop.” You complained, moving away from the smoke that Slash was blowing out from his cigarette. He stopped his guitar playing, looking offended.

“Stop what?” He asked, hurt.

“All you guys do is smoke. It’s making me feel sick.” Maybe you were overreacting, but the smell of cigarette smoke lately had been making you nauseous. It had once been an almost comforting smell alerting you of your boyfriend or one of his band mate’s presence, but it was becoming overwhelming.

“Oh. Okay. I thought you meant I sucked.” Slash laughed a little, more than happy to put out his cigarette.

“She won’t even let me smoke at home anymore.” Duff explained, smiling at you from across the stage. They were rehearsing for their show the next night and you had tagged along, hoping being out of the house would cure the weird sensation you had been feeling lately. It was almost like you were in some foggy rut, tired and often times nauseous.

“I’m helping you out in the long run.” You replied back to him, succeeding in making him laugh. When they finished up, Duff rejoined you and wrapped his arms around you tightly.

“Ow,” you mumbled into his shirt. Your boobs felt sore pressing into his body. Duff pulled back to check you over.

“What?”

“Nothing, my boobs are just sore...” you replied, bewildered and not understanding why Duff nodded to himself. “Why are you nodding, do you get that too sometimes?” You asked sarcastically, quickly and irrationally growing more annoyed by the second. He only chuckled calmly at your quip and grabbed your hand, leading you towards your car.

“Hear me out for a second, honey.” He told you. “Let’s do an inventory of your symptoms.”

“My symptoms?” You demanded. “Okay, Dr. McKagan, let’s hear it.”

“So, let’s see. Lately you’ve been falling asleep before you can even make it to the bed.”

“I have not!” You argued.

“Baby, I’ve carried you to bed from the couch every night this week.” You stopped in amazement. “And I’ve had to drag you out of bed every morning. You also keep snapping at me...” you pouted, instantly feeling guilty, and Duff wrapped his arm around your shoulder. “...but that’s okay because I know you don’t mean to. Now your boobs are sore. The smell of smoke makes you sick. On top of all of that, your period is late.”

“...My period is late?” You asked flatly, stopping in your tracks. It felt like you were suddenly far away, like your head stopped working as you looked up at Duff, dumbfounded. 

The two of you were going on your third year of a relationships and never had a single argument. You just agreed on everything and had the same viewpoints. For the most part, you and Duff were a very safe couple, but there were a few times every now and then when he hadn’t used protection. Maybe foolishly, neither of you really thought much of it. Until now.

In the middle of the parking lot behind the Troubadour, you sat down on the ground, taking in all of his points.

“Baby?” He asked you gently, kneeling down in the middle of the parking lot with you, his hands resting on your knees. You could only blink at his concerned face for a moment.

“My period is late.” You repeated. “How did you know that?” He chuckled a little and shrugged like it was nothing.

“You’re my girl. It isn’t that hard to keep up with after a while.” All of a sudden it hit you, how you were never out of tampons when you did get your period because of the mysterious brand-new box every month underneath the sink. It never even crossed your mind before who was buying them, just the fact that you never ran out. Now you could remember the relief you felt every month when Duff would surprise you with a date to get ice cream when you really needed it the most, as if he just always knew. Turns out he did. He was an amazing boyfriend with immaculate attention to detail and care of you. The realization overwhelmed you and you began bawling hysterically in the parking lot.

“Hey, don’t cry. It’s gonna be okay,” you heard him murmur before you felt him scoop you up and carry you the rest of the way to your car. He sat you in the passenger seat carefully and knelt down beside you.

“How do you always know what brand of tampons to buy?” You sobbed, making him laugh as he did his best to wipe away your tears.

“How stupid do you think I am?” He teased you, making you laugh. He caressed your cheek with his thumb gently once the tears stopped and used his free hand to grab one of yours. “Y/N, I think you’re pregnant.” He whispered. Immediately, you began sobbing again. “Please, stop crying, baby. It’ll be okay, I promise, I’m with you.” Duff did his best to fit what he could of his body into the space with you and hold you, anything to stop the racking sobs going through your body. “We can do whatever you want to do.”

“I don’t even know what to do.” You sniffled. “My head can’t even think right now.”

“Why don’t we find out for certain?” Duff suggested.

45 minutes later, the two of you were sitting on the bed of your apartment, waiting for the results of the drugstore pregnancy test. You were gripping Duff’s as tight as you could, feeling like you might float away if you didn’t, but he never complained.

“When my older sister got pregnant, the smell of my brother-in-law smoking made her sick.” Duff told you gently, smiling a little at you when you glanced at him quickly. “When you told me the same thing, I started to have a feeling.”

Finally, the two little lines on the test stick showed up, clear as day, as if you needed more evidence. You lowered the stick and Duff watched you silently, waiting for your reaction. Of course, you began crying.

“I promise, whatever you want to do, I support it.” Duff kissed the top of your head and rubbed your back soothingly now. You shook your head vehemently.

“Duff, I’m...I don’t know. I love you so much. You take care of me so well, in a way I’m realizing I never even knew how much you do for me every day. I feel so overwhelmed; I mean, you would make the perfect dad, but I don’t know if I could really be a good mom...” Duff grabbed your shoulders lightly and turned you to face him, an incredulous look on his face.

“Are you kidding me, Y/N? Do you realize all my nephews and nieces used to call me their favorite and now it’s you? Every time I call back home, they’re just disappointed it’s not you.” You chuckled a little. “You’re amazing with kids! Everything you do in life, you do it like it comes naturally. Whether it’s waking up and somehow looking perfect with drool on your face—”

“Hey!” You protested, the both of you laughing.

“Or whether it’s all the things you do for me. Y/N, we’re a team. I do all those things for you because you do those things for me too. Buying me new belts without asking because you know the leather on mine are tearing, making sure I’m drinking water even though it’s disgusting—”

“Duff, water is not disgusting.”

“But the best thing you do,” he pulled you onto his knee and kissed your temple. “Is love me the only way you can. I think we can love this baby and raise it together and do alright.” You reached out and grabbed the pregnancy stick again, staring down at it in wonder and felt his hand snake around your waist and rest on your abdomen gently. After a moment, you rested your hand on top of his.

“Well, I hope we do better than alright.” You decided, smiling widely at the grin that appeared on Duff’s face. “...Like you said, we’re a team.” He held you to him even tighter and kissed your lips, smiling against them.

“I love you so much, Y/N.”

[im-only-joking]

18 from the angst/prompt list, with Barzy plz 🥰

Gotchu dude! love me some fluffy barzy shit.

No warnings, probs like Rated G for literally nothing but fluff. Maybe a little language. Tiny bit of angst/sad but like... shit sucks rn so. It’s a mood.

Bad days happened. You knew that. Your therapist always said that bad days had good moments and to try and write those down when they happened to keep a positive outlook. 

But, everything seemed to go wrong today. You couldn’t think of one good or even meh thing that occurred. First, you spilled your piping hot tea all over your hands, and now had little burns on your fingers, then your cat had hacked up his breakfast on your newly cleaned and fresh smelling sheets, and your head was pounding with what you knew was a fast-approaching migraine. 

You finally decided to say fuck it, and started to bawl your eyes out.

Your boyfriend Mat found you sitting on your kitchen floor near your laundry closet, whimpering like a kicked puppy, eyes full of tears, and head pounding. 

“Oh Y/N. Honey, it’s okay,” Mat murmured, quickly sitting beside you and pulling you into his embrace. You let out a soft sob and nuzzled into his neck as he rocked you a little, rubbing your back and softly repeating calming words to you. 

“I’ve got you, sweetheart,” he said, pressing a kiss to your aching temple. “What do you need? Want me to run a bath for you?”

“Please. Can you get me something for my head?” you sniffled, barely opening your eyes, as the kitchen light made your eyes feel like they were burning out of your skull. 

“Migraine?” Mat asked, standing to turn off the bright kitchen light and open the medicine cupboard.

You nodded, and he grabbed the bottle of Excedrin you’d had specifically for your terrible migraines.

Mat pushed a glass of water and a pill into your hand before going to the bathroom to start a bath for you. 

He came back a moment later, gently tugging you up from your position on the floor. Your knees ached from being down there for a while.

“I need to put my sheets in the laundry,” you sighed. “Percy puked on them.”

Mat made a face and looked at the offending animal, who was curled up on your couch, contentedly purring away, stomach clearly feeling just fine now. 

“He’s a turd. I got the sheets, go take your bath. I have a candle on the sink instead of the overhead light.”

You shoulders sagged in relief. 

“I love you a whole lot Mathew,” you said, smiling softly at the man.

“I know. I love you too. Wouldn’t clean up anyone else’s cat’s vomit,” Mat grinned, causing you to giggle. “Shoo, now. I’ll bring you some tea in a bit.”

“Best boyfriend,” you mumbled, kissing his cheek. 

Maybe with Mat bad days did always have a bright spot. 

[theravenclawmonster]

I thought getting diagnosed would be able to get me help...(post 1 of dunno how many)

Trigger warning: This post (and the later continuation posts after it titled the same) may contain mentions of abuse, mental illness, suicidal thoughts and many more things which i will try to edit in it after writing the post(s) (hopefully i’ll remember to)

Disclaimer: this is just a written account of events that happened in my life in the past few weeks and my emotional/ physical response to those events. I am writing this here so that it stays here as help for people to read and maybe see what certain things feel like, and as proof or diary for when i forget what really happened and start to believe her words. Also, this is going to be a long post... a very long post.

So, i thought getting diagnosed would maybe help me... A couple of weeks ago, i realized that my heart has been beating a bit faster than what i remembered it used to and my blood pressure would get low. Of course like every other pain or issue ever, i tried to first ignore it and act it out (trying to look fine) but you see, with low BP i really couldn’t act okay. My brain would go numb, i would feel like my brain was pushing me (the consciousness or me in my brain) towards the top of my forehead forcing me into my skull from inside; everything else felt numb. I couldn’t really speak or even think, all words were slurred if i tried my hardest. My body moved very slowly, i couldn’t even raise a finger in the normal speed (even in front of my parents, in front of who i never ever show if i am in pain or ill. but until then i had hid it pretty well by going to my room or just not letting them see me that much). By this time i didn’t know what was happening and episodes like this continued for 3 or 4 days, until one day i remembered that i should check my blood pressure as my heart feels like drowning (it was around 90 and 65 and pulse more than 110). Now, as someone whose blood pressure has always been around 110/70, i got a bit scared; i didn’t know if it was okay to have it this low or not and i wasn’t feeling okay at all. Anyway, it dropped a bit more and my mother noticed me (until then i was completely wiped out, had no strength to even be present in my body let alone act okay. i continuously felt like if i closed my eyes i’d slip away and never come back.

My mother told me to get up and have some ORS (some sort of salts and electrolytes thingy used in dehydration etc) and eat bananas. after some time my heart felt a bit fine and my BP rose up to 105 and something. But i felt exhausted, as if i had fought a war with my bare hands. I couldn’t even ask them to take me to a doctor and after this episode was over she suggested it very ummm... very angrily... so i stayed quiet. Later my sister (married) texted me and said that Mom will get an appointment for her general physician tomorrow for you. She obviously had talked to my mother on the phone and knew all about it (or at least as much as my mother decided to tell her). The next day she took the appointment which was for almost 2 weeks later (only time available). throughout the days leading up to that she told me that i’d feel fine and we’d not even need to go to the doc.

finally, the day arrived. My mother had been telling me to write things to show the doc, my symptoms and stuff, but i couldn’t write anything. I wrote this on a paper 9in a slow child-like handwriting:

1. Pain everywhere

    Tired

    Breathe (referring to difficulty in breathing but i couldn’t write the whole sentence)

the day i went to the doctor i added “ fog/ Quick sand” to the list wanting to say that i feel like i am in a fog/ quick sand as everything including my body and my brain function becomes very slow and delayed.

I didn’t take that paper to the doctor (well, that exquisitely written note wasn’t very helpful). I had decided beforehand that i’d somehow send my mother out and talk to the doctor in private as my emotionally abusive and controlling mother makes me unable to function like a normal human being. It took me days to prepare myself to say that. I also took all my history with me from the beginning of the year. Below is the brief history:

[ I had a very bad chest infection right after chicken pox (at the start of this year, yes great start to a great year 2020), I had to get a chest x-ray in which Scoliosis (bending of spine) showed up. According to the doctors and my family, as it was an incidental finding, it was asymptomatic and therefore needed no treatment or even a brace. No one cared to pay attention to what i said or how i felt as the fucking patient who actually dealt with a lot of back and shoulder and literally almost every kind of bone pain, and for whom the discovery of scoliosis was an answer to a lot.] Anyway, back to the regular rant.

so we went to the doctor. As i sat outside waiting for my turn, i practised again and again about how to ask to be diagnosed in private and not making my mother mad. first, my mother’s turn arrived and she told me to go in with her and remember what doctor tells her for her diabetes and acidity issues. After she was done... (i am getting a bit hazy here) i think the doctor brought up my scoliosis (i went to him in the beginning of the year and he referred me to an osteopath or someone) he talked about how he discussed my case with his colleague and he advised me to go to another hospital in another city for they have a specific department for things like scoliosis. After he said it all and looked at me expectantly to start telling him why i was there, i told my, mother if she can leave, she laughed embarrassed and acted like ha ha sweety i won’t disturb you go on ahead. but i repeated it a couple more times ( i think my tone was pretty dry, but i am not sure as i couldn’t really regulate anything at that time).

She left. then the doctor asked me about my health and i started to explain, except i couldn’t find the right words and forgot everything and just burst into tears. he patiently offered me tissues and waited for my answer. I explained somewhat. i don’t really remember the symptoms i explained, just that i felt fake and weird as if it all wasn’t really happening or i was faking everything and don’t know why the hell i kept bawling my eyes out, i was fine!! stop crying and making a scene. I was also inwardly thankful that my mother wasn’t in the room as i have had a similar experience of crying in front of a doctor and she taunted me about it for months calling me fake and attention seeking and a liar. Anyway, here is a list of what i told the doctor (from what i can remember):

- i feel like i am always holding myself up tightly, if i let go i’d fall. My muscles all feel seized up

-I have difficulty in breathing, i can’t breathe deeply for years. and before it was connected to emotional issues but now its almost all day everyday.

-As because of scoliosis my ribcage is a bit twisted so if i bent over my left ribs dig into my stomach area and it is quite painful if my stomach is full, if i have gained weight or if i have gas.

-my ankles feel swollen on the inside and walking is painful, my heels hurt and the top of my foot and the pain goes all the way up to my pelvic bone and back. My back hurts all the fucking time.

-My knees hurt so much that i have not been able to put my weight on my left knee for more than a week now (it has been hurting in the past as well) and now my body had developed a weird habit of walking up the stairs without putting pressure on left knee at all, which has in turn made my right knee tired and painful.

- I can’t really feel hungry. like if i don’t eat for a long time i’d feel that painful hunger in my stomach but i have no desire to eat and i keep forgetting about it. even when i try to eat i look at food and recoil in a little, i can’t eat it usually or at least like i use to ( I loved food more than almost anything ever, with only some foods that i couldn’t eat). and even after i eat (usually only when i eat something with wheat in it) my stomach swells up a round and painful (which is even more painful when the ribs dig into it.

-My jaw feels stiff and my teeth and gums hurt as if i have been clenching my jaw (which i do catch myself doing quite often)

-oh! i actually started out with saying that i can’t really hold up my neck some of the time (like a baby), and it keep falling around if i relax, it was happening right then too. then i cried. i also mentioned something about my bones painfully feeling like they’ll fuse into each other (if i lie on my side sometimes i feel like both sides of my ribcage will collapse into each other

This was all i could remember then and i think there might be more that i told him but i don’t remember it rn

The doctor asked me things in return. he asked me about my sleep which i told him i can’t sleep. I have been a person who’d sleep 7- 8 hours a night and then also take a nap in the day. I love to sleep, i could always sleep, no matter what happened. If i had cramps, migraine, back pain, emotional abuse, my favorite character died, tired, bored anything; I’d sleep it off. But now, no matter when o lie down, firstly, i am in too much pain to be comfortable in any position, it takes hours to fall asleep and no more fun daydreaming before sleep too. and then i wake up even more exhausted somehow.

He checked my BP and breathing ( i couldn’t breathe properly maybe because of crying) and stomach softness. My BP was 135/95 which i contributed to the car ride (i have car anxiety... dunno what it is but i get super anxious and panicky in a car especially with my family) but he said it could be because you just cried so much.

so, then he said that you are too stressed and your neurons are constantly firing cuz pain both emotional and physical. (he was talking for quite some time but i don’t remember what he said) he said most of it seems to be mental but upon my request he did give a few tests (one in particular expensive one for some muscle disease or something) then he referred me to a psychiatrist. he also asked me to write down my symptoms as the more i tell the doctor the better they can diagnose. then i got out and told my mother the diagnosis and referral. she went in to the office herself and talked to him for some time.

So, we had the tests done (with my father making it a point to say loudly how expensive was one of them in particular) and got an appointment for the psychiatrist. Also said that i have some stomach acidity and gave medicine for that

this seems like a huge post so i am thinking about making another one for that session and the later drama, hopefully before i forget

part two can be found here

[underworldwitxh]

Heartbreak feels worse than a bullet to the brain

Pairing: Kaminari Denki/Reader

Rating: T/M

Warning: angry

A/N: Im pissed off rn so here’s this

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~You scream in anger “JUST GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME. FOR FUCKS SAKES DENKI. IM THIS FUCKING CLOSE TO JUST SAYING SCREW IT AND FUCKING CLAWING YOUR FUCKING FACE OFF!!!!!!” You huff out as you grab your things and jam your coat on as you storm out of the apartment you share with your boyfriend Denki. You loved him, you did, but god did he annoy you to the fucking moon and back. Especially when he decides that it's his turn to do something and god forbid you finish what you're doing. You understand he likes playing with his friends but it makes you feel like what you want to do or what you feel like doing aren't important and can get shoved aside. It makes you feel like while you know he loves you, that your just arm candy and your feelings dont matter whatsoever. You were so done feeling like that. If denki couldn't figure out that his behaviour was driving you away then that was on him. You went to your friend’s house to cool off. Denki just sat there stunned at your reaction. His friends on the mic were caught between wanting to rib him for his girl troubles and genuinely wanting to know what was wrong. 

You ranted and raved to your friend, finally just collapsing on their couch crying. You hated that no matter what strong emotions you felt you always ended crying. Frustrated - burst into tears, Sad - crying like a babe, Angry - screaming tears. You loved him, you did. Or did you? Because it was times like this that made you question if you actually stayed with him because you loved him or if it was easier to stay and just be miserable. You ended up deciding to stay with your friend for the night. You didn't bother to text denki, he never bothered to inform you when he was doing things with his friends unless you asked. You shut your phone off and just laid on their spare futon. For the first time you didnt feel like you had to hold your tongue. You didn't have a headache when going to bed for the first time in a long time. You didn't feel like you had to pretend to be happy. 

For the first time since you two had gotten together, denki went to bed alone. He tried texting you to see if you were coming home but none of his texts were answered. He tried to call you but all his calls went straight to voicemail. He was worried for you. So he tried to reach out to your friends. When he talked to the friend you were staying with for the night, he just felt like the absolute asshole. You had gone there in tears and told your friend everything you’d been feeling. They didn't hold back when telling him what you said. To know that he consistently made you feel like your feelings didn't matter, that you didn't matter killed him. He just wanted his little FireFly back home with him. He’d do anything to have you stay with him. So he begged your friend to please watch over you. He was going to do something to make sure you knew he loved you. 

When you were ready to head back to the apartment, you decision made. Your friend stopped asking you to think your options through before making a choice. You just nodded and sighed heading back to the apartment. Stepping through the door, all you could hear was some light 

music, no yelling about dying some random death. No screaming at teammates for being dumbasses. You honestly wondered if he was even home. Seeing as you associated him being home as him having his ass glued to that gaming chair and headset taped to his head. When you hear a throat clearing behind you, you see denki standing there all his gaming stuff and systems packed up into boxes. “What are you doing denki?” you asked softly 

 The blonde looked up at you, his face lighting up as he saw that you were home. “Hey FireFly, well i've packed up all of the gaming stuff and am moving it to Sero’s house. That way you don't have to be mad or upset that i'm not paying attention to.” you scoff loudly “so what now i'll never see you home is that? If you wanted to break up there’s less convoluted ways Kaminari.” you push past him to go to the bedroom and drag out a couple suitcases. He follows you, confused as to why your mad. “But Fire-” “That's not my name. Ether call me Y/N or Y/L/N. You seriously don't see what the issue is do you? Think about it Kaminari. You just told me that you moved all the video game stuff to Sero’s house. The one thing that made you come home, because you sure as hell never came home to see me.” you spat at him as you slammed the lid closed on the second suitcase. You grabbed both suitcases and headed towards the door. Before you left though you stopped and ripped off a ring and some other jewelry. “Here, i won't need these!” you throw them at the stuned male. “I’ll be back later for the rest of my things. As of now we’re through Denki Kaminari. 

It took the slamming of the front door to cause him to move. He just sunk to his knees tears filling his eyes as he watched the best thing to ever happen to him walk away mad. He thought he’d been doing the right thing. Getting rid of something that was hurting you. But all that did was hurt you more. He didn't know what to do. He just wanted to spend the rest of forever with you. He loved you so much. That little jewelry box that had been sitting in his pocket suddenly felt like it weighed a thousand pounds. He collapsed to the floor bawling, clenching his shirt in one hand, his other dialing a familiar number “What is it Denki?” the voice asked “She left me, she left me and it's all my fault. I drove her away. I'm such a horrible person.” he blabbered on the voice on the other end sighed “Denki, it'll be ok. Y/N probably just needs to calm down and then she’ll be back in your arms in no time.” 

“No she won't, this isn't like the other times where she’d gone off to cool down after a fight. She meant it. She really meant it. She gave back my old U.A. tags and then she just left. Jirou, she’s gone and i miss her.” Denki sobbed into the phone. Jirou just sighed again. She knew Y/N had been unhappy for a long time, that's the problem with dating Denki. He was fun in the beginning but after awhile it just became dull. It wasn't his fault though, for him he never really left the honeymoon stage of a relationship, where as his partner’s would always find the once cute little ticks of his to become great annoyances.