#//obsessed with Felassans actually

[fatedmuses]

What Color is Your Aura?

Lavender

rock candy, daydreams, chapstick, ribbons in hair, crayons, flower fields, sleepovers. your essence is lavender: you are devoted and dependent, desiring approval. you are a bleeding heart; your passion is giving to others, but you also need for them to see you. you create little homes with others wherever you can. you are the giver. you are the needing. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of orchid, amethyst, rose, and lilac, who share your fear of being alone. you are also drawn to the staunch souls pearl and ashen, who will help you grow and realize just how much is inside of you. however, you may struggle to get along with the diligent personalities of honeysuckle and peach who don't always know how to let you help.

Grey

window panes, fog, old sweaters, clouds, cobwebs, ash, owl feathers. your essence is grey: you seek to bear the truth for the betterment of others. it is at the sacrifice of your own feelings; you stomach anything that would make you small. you adapt when change is certain, but your pillars never falter. you are the role model. you are the statue. you find kinship in like-minded individuals of ivory, noir, chiffon, and wine, who share your polished conduct. you are also drawn to the vibrant pink and purple, who will help you grow and teach you to see other facets of yourself. however, you may struggle to get along with the introspective personalities of blue and yellow who will question their self-worth.

tagged by: @iron-hearts-ablaze (thanks!)

tagging: whoever would like to do it <3

[felassan]

Some thoughts on the character descriptions & other details from game files. DA:TV spoilers under cut.

[original source link]

Some of the char notes are v neat and interesting. ◕‿◕ (caveat to bear in mind of course: gamefiles info can contradict what is presented in game as plots and ideas naturally & normally can change a lot throughout development. what's in the game and other media is what's canon. that said they're still neat and interesting to think about.)

You can read Ghil talking to some of her "stock" in a/some Trespasser armor codex[es]

Like Dalish lore in modern Thedas has it (the Ascension of Ghilan'nain), Ghil had the distinction of being the only mortal elf uplifted into the Evanuris pantheon

" (in this case, Solas's murder of his friend Felassan by stabbing him in the back)" - "[TME quote] He never heard the blow that killed him." q.q

Spirits of Profit are a thing (note: this kind of thing I just like to take as canon as long as nothing in-game actually contradicts it being a possible thing in the world hh)

Spirits of Need are a thing

Spirits of Passion are a thing

Demons of Obsession are a thing

Spirits of Freedom are possibly a thing

Not just a General, Felassan was the second-in-command

The idea/possibility that the Caretaker is (or at one point during development was thought to be) what remains of a truly ancient dragon, who long ago took on the form of this spirit, then was summoned by ancient elves, slaps

"A spirit of chaos and freedom, unleashed by Solas to break through a labyrinth to his ally Mythal", "A spirit heavily implied to be the Caretaker in another era, speaking with Solas about the attempt to rescue Mythal. Speaking with the spirit, Solas makes it clear that he will sacrifice anything to save Mythal." - I wonder if at one point there was an idea to have a scene which was another relivable Solas Crossroads memory, where this Mythal-rescue scenario would play out? Maybe Rook would have 'played' the Spirit of Chaos in that memory similar to the one where Solas and Felassan call spirits to launch an attack on an Elgar'nan fortress

Inquisitor - "relatable leader and mentor", "confident, knowing" 🥺

Interesting to see that Charter at one point may have appeared in the game and had a role. There are still references to her and her work in some DA:TV codexes

The character descriptions for Varric and Dorian, and the Morrigan speech pattern note, are so fun hhh. some characters simply need no introduction

Two possible appearances, depending on how the player resolves her past: 1. Dark black dyed hair 2. Red hair with streaks of grey CHARACTERDESCRIPTION: Isabela from Dragon Age II

At one point there was possibly an idea to have further choices such as what happened to Isabela in DA2 be in the game.

"Manfred is curious, loyal, innocent, and wants to be helpful." 🥺

I had personally been hcing Lucanis as 36 so that is neat

the ages listed are age ranges meant to help inform the char info, & info players would actually see/hear in the games and other media like books etc would take precedence. I would place Teia and Harding as at least a few years older than what's given for example (Teia was 28 when she became a Talon, and it's now 9:52; and I don't really see Harding as having been as young as 19 in DA:I in 9:42 as a Lead Scout. young definitely, but not that young).

and this is more based on subjective vibes than any canon info, but I read Viago as being older than this, and older than Lucanis, Illario and Teia.

ACCENT: Hint of Italian, but not as strong as Zevran's. (He is from a coastal city in Antiva, which had an influx of Tevinter refugees from Seheron after the Qunari invaded 100 years or so ago. That’€™s why he looks and sounds different from Zevran and Josephine.) [Caterina] Older Korean-Spanish or Korean-Italian woman (from the same region as Lucanis)

This is neat worldbuilding. a hint at what people from Seheron or people with Seheron heritage may be like.

Lucanis now bears scars both physically and mentally from his time as a brainwashed executioner for an evil mage cult. No longer the pragmatic assassin always in control, he wrestles with becoming what he’s spent his life hunting: a demon-possessed abomination. He longs to return to his former glory, but the monster inside him demands blood and vengeance. With his future hanging in the balance, Lucanis must decide whether to give into the demon or control it.

some other ideas about what Lucanis' storyline may/could have been at a different point in time.

Taash is a Qunari agent with a specialization in infiltration -- a thief, basically. She can scale buildings, pick locks, and take out enemies with quick and brutal efficiency.

some other ideas about what Taash's storyline/character may/could have been at a different point in time. maybe Ben-Hassrath-y? infiltration and stuff reminds me of the 'spies and heists' version of the game that was reported on at one point.

This whole set of descriptions is so good, no notes ＼(￣▽￣)／

Spite was once a Spirit of Passion drawn to Lucanis's will to live, but years of torture and a desire for revenge has twisted him into a Demon of Obsession.

some other ideas about what Spite's storyline/character may/could have been at a different point in time. in-game we hear Spite referred to as a Spirit of Determination (Isabela, Rowan, Solas), and Mary Kirby has described Spite on social media as having the basic aspect of Defiance.

"The Godmother of the Antivan Crows" hhh＼(￣▽￣)／

Interesting backstory information on Rayan Ivenci

Dartonia's farming background and Timetri's military family background tracks with an in-game dialogue line Lucanis has in banter about how Crows often recruit from the army and the trades

Ivenci and Fletcher [Crows Merchant in the Diamond] are both non-binary and use they/them pronouns; they use they/them pronouns also in the game

The Crows are still recruiting and training minors, if a 15 year-old Crow is already well-trained in dual daggers. fledglings Dartonia and Timetri are given as 17.

"Chance is a stylish, dramatic Orlesian who joined the Crows to be their emmisary among the courts of Orlais. (French accent.)" - handy inspo grounds (just one example of many things you could hc) to hc why an Antivan Crow Rook doesn't have an Antivan accent, if you wanted. there is also the example of Heir, who is Orlesian (unless of course you simply hc them as having an Antivan accent :D)

The Treviso Market master's name is Sidestreet Alidare

Anaris had "half-possessed" Cyrian, via the mask as we saw

Anaris, an ancient elven "would-be" god. If you were a power-hungry and/or angry 'mortal' elf back then, it must have been maddening that only Ghil was granted ascension, and to live under Evanuris tyranny

Strife Dragonage is 50

Strife is a keen-eyed hunter who grew up in the elven city slums, but was taken in by the forest-dwelling Dalish elves and taught to be an expert woodsman. He's rugged, tough, adventurous, and doesn't suffer fools. He feels some disconnect between his city-upbringing and his current role as a hunter - somtimes Strife worries he's an imposter, not truly growing up with his people, but he's tried to take their teachings to heart. Strife is loyal to those who earn his friendship, and fiercely protective of his clan.

here I am simply quoting the Strife blurb, as a Strife appreciator. reference to his backstory as a Starkhaven City Elf and joining of Dalish Clan Morlyn, and the toughness he showed in Three Trees to Midnight. nice to see his perspective / thoughts explored a bit here as a City Elf who joined the Dalish and what that means to him and how he relates to the world.

IRELIN A Dalish elf who grew up in the woods, Irelin has learned the ancient and incredibly rare art of shapeshifting. She uses this ability to move secretly in the forest, scouting for her people. Practical and no-nonsense when it comes to defending her clan and her friends, she has a healthy distrust of outsiders, especially the humans who've persecuted and exploited her people for so long. Irelin takes a secret joy in the thrill and power of shapeshifting, however. She loves exploring as the different animals of the forest, and knows some of their paths better than anyone.

I loved seeing this info on/exploration of Irelin too. :)

Protect Evka and Antoine

Rook Thorne snippet: "If Rook is a Grey Warden, Greta [30] has met them before--they both became Wardens around the same time. Greta doesn't know Rook well--it's more like running into an old school mate--but she likes them". maybe this is simply in the game as dialogue ofc, but I haven't played a Thorne yet so I wouldn't know :)

"A cat" hhhhhh :D

Mae's age-range is 50

Dragon King: "Basically, a bad guy doing his evil bad guy best." lmao

Hezenkoss's creation is described as a "bone golem", taking me back to the flesh golems (Harvester etc) in prior DA games

Is "Sealed Spirit" the Formless One? since its description mentions possessing an undead dragon, and its in the Mourn Watch/Necropolis section.

Tarquin x Viper feels aaa

Vorgoth's whole segment (and Vorgoth as a character) is so fascinating. maybe they're a rogue, Thedas-loving member of the same type of entity as whatever the Executors are? some of the description here and their appearance in the game reminds me of the description of the Executor in TN and also the Executors' appearance in the DA:TV secret ending.

THE EXECUTOR APPEARANCE: Human-appearing CHARACTERDESCRIPTION: A masked and hooded figure that speaks like someone unfamiliar with language in general. Stilted, awkward, but with a low menace. SPEECHPATTERN: Stilted. Is trying to form words from thoughts that are far more complex than a regular person's.

also very intriguing, naturally. the way they're described (trying to form words from thoughts, being unfamiliar with language) makes them sound spirit/demon-y or adjacent.. it also reminds me somewhat of the description of the way the Cekorax was rendering speech (iirc) in TN. if the place they come from does indeed have empty settlements made of crystal and obsidian - well, entities unfamiliar with language etc in this kind of way might also be unfamiliar with regular settlements/mortal world settlements, no? at one point in time it may have been the idea that we would meet an Executor in-game as part of the story.

(like I said I know it being in the game files doesn't automatically make something canon, it's just fun to peruse and add to hcs or not etc. this post is just a bunch of personal headcanon/speculation really ^^)

[original source link]

[night-market-if]

I agree with your DAV take! I was really really excited. Pre-ordered deluxe, finished in about four days, and was left with mixed emotions. I'm curious what your opinion will be once you reach the third act, because imo that was the best part of the game. But, yeah, this is the first DA game where I've been more interested in continuing the main story than doing any of the companion questlines. Which is both a bad and good thing. Mostly a bad one. Once you finish the game, I definitely recommend taking a look at the veilguard art book. Google Books has about 50 or so preview pages, and @/felassan has posted them on their tumblr as well. There's a lot of art from the original concepts the dev team was brewing immediately after Inquisition. Before execs were like "fuck that we actually need live service games", and before David Gaider and other DA veterans left or were let go. It feels so much more like dragon age, and I've just been mourning what we could've had lol. But it's interesting to see the concepts that made it into the final product after all that, and how much ended up sanitized in that distinctly corporate way. But, yeah, I just wish the dev team had been given the resources and freedom they needed. Also sorry for rambling in your ask box lol I'm just obsessed with DA

I have still yet to finish it. I've literally been choosing Supermarket Simulator and Sims 4 over the game. Which is just such a sad sign to me. I want to like it so very badly. I really do. And I will finish it (no spoilers) but it's just one of those things where I think the only reason I am playing is for Solas content. Because I love him so much. But I remember when Inquisition came out. I called off work and played it like crazy for days. When the end twist came, I literally called my husband at work to scream.

The opening of Origins with the dragon flying by still gives me chills. It transports me right back to my first apartment that I shared with my mother. To steaming mugs of tea that I would drink so I could stay up and play it just a bit longer. Me surviving on eggs because it was the quickest thing to cook so I could get back to playing.

I don't know if I'm just not in a stage of my life anymore that allows me to immerse myself or if the game was just that uninteresting. And like I said, I will finish it, but I just don't care about any of the characters and half the time, they start talking about something, and I zone out.

Though, this is a case and point to the fact that writers and developers just need to be free to do their own thing without the higher ups intervening.

[faded-mage]

Isathe

Felassan is kind. Isathe thought often as they traveled together. At first, his sarcasm threw her off entirely. She never experienced that before and quite often thought he was being serious. She slowly learned more of the nuances of language and grew to enjoy the playful banter he provided. It brought a small spark of joy to converse with another elf without the fear. He looked at her with the same kindness that Daern’thal once did. No, it was not kindness in Daern’thal’s gaze. Felassan looked at her as if he did not expect anything from her at all, that was actual kindness.

The longer she spent awake in this world, the more she grew to understand that Daern’thal’s affections were not love. It was possession. In the darkest hours of the night as she lay looking up at the tent’s ceiling she tried to remind herself of the pain the man caused her, in hopes that it would ease her heartache. It did little but she continued to try anyway. The small moments of joy and life during her travels reminded her what it felt like before it all. Before she felt that pain and uncertainty. When the heat from a warm bath was a new and exciting sensation, not just a way to scrub away the feeling of disgust that lay on her skin. If she scrubbed hard enough then the bad memories would leave her.

Felassan tried to catch her up on the history that she missed. He was vague in many aspects, particularly around his knowledge of the rebellion. Her own memories from that time were haunted with fear, she did not pry when his jaw grew tight and he forced humor into his voice. He educated her on the fall of the Elvhenan, the destruction of Arlathan and how their people were hunted by the humans until their land was taken from them and the elves were placed under heel. He spoke of the Dalish, a group of elves that tried to return to the old ways. Felassan held kindness in his tone when he spoke of them, despite them getting more wrong than right about elven history. But they were trying. He impressed that fact upon her often.

The modern elves also aged. The mere concept to her was foreign and frightening. They could no longer live countless ages, pursing what was their core purpose. Floating free in the Sky, not that there was a connection to it anymore. Wait, no. Not the Sky. It was not called that anymore, those here called it the Fade and they never knew a time where the Fade was one with everything else. Elves were no longer pulled from the Fade and given form through lyrium. They were created like the animals, through acts of flesh and desire. Through love or violence.

Her own people were remembered, somewhat, to the modern elves. The Forgotten Ones spoken of through hushed whispers as if something dark would awaken if anyone dared let the names drop from their lips. Maybe her own name was lost through history and she could just exist as she wanted to. That want, that need still sat in her belly but maybe she was not lost to her nature. Not yet.

Isathe held little that was hers. What Daern’thal did to her, how he coaxed her from the Sky was not how she was supposed to be. The elf understood more now than she ever did back then. Her mind slipped away in quiet moments when there was nothing to distract her from her memories. She sat at the very edge of understanding that she may not have deserved the pain inflicted on her before quickly retreating back into herself. The same prayer fell from her lips, twisting her deeper - He is my protector. Only he can keep me safe. That devotion and obsession still hidden under the surface. But she was free of him, once she adjusted to the world she could attempt to move past whatever was wrong with her. Or learn to live with the want.

The elf sometimes looked at her oddly, as if he had questions in the back of his mind for her but refused to speak them aloud. Isathe protected her satchel fiercely, it rarely left her side as her fingers clung to it like it was the only lifeline to her past life. Felassan certainly noticed. Inside the satchel was the dagger she found, the one once owned by Daern’thal. Some nights she removed the blade from her bag and sat in the moonlight with it in her lap. The silver blade reflecting in the light above her, reminding her of Daern’thal’s eyes. The flash of silver when they stood face to face in the darkness. Their eyes mirrors of one another. Then the guilt would appear, that tearing apart at the center of her very beginning. Memory of pain weaving through the forced memories of happiness.

Her mask was the other item hidden within her bag, wrapped in what was left of her clothing from before. Isathe ran her fingertips along the smooth ivory mask. It yellowed with age while she slept. The elf did not understand why she kept it, it was a reminder of when she was a thing to own but it was the only existence she knew of. She came to realize she was slowly forgetting what it felt like being a spirit at all. The small moments of curiosity reminded her but they disappeared quicker each time, only to be replaced with that deep hunger, that want. A yearning. Was it this Veil between her and the Sky pulling her farther away from the self she knew?

Felassan’s kindness continued as they traveled. She even found that she laughed again, a true laughter. The kind that would create a bittersweet ache in her stomach. He taught her some of the common tongue. Isathe did not know how to extend her gratitude toward the man who was so patient with her. He never asked her questions about her life before uthenera. Why she sometimes flinched if his hand moved too quickly toward her. Or why she cried when he gave her clothing to wear. The leather and cloth felt warm against her skin. It was not showy, it did not shine in the light but it was comfortable and now there was something else that was just hers. Appeasing that want inside of her for a little while.

Guilt continued to eat at her during the nights. How dare she be relieved to have woken up where the Forgotten Ones were past recollection. If the Dalish and the elves of this time did not know who they were or how they existed then they would have no cause to believe she was one of the evils of their mythos. Isathe was happy to be forgotten. One evening as Isathe quietly cut vegetables they foraged during their trip and Felassan built the fire, her curiosity got the better of her. She wanted to know more about the Forgotten Ones. Isathe hesitated and she could hear the worry that sat in her tone, “You said the Forgotten Ones do not have names?” Felassan glanced up so his eyes could meet hers, “Yes. Only a few names survived history.” With a brow furrowed, her lips curled into a small frown as her gaze returned to the vegetables sitting in front of her, “Which?”

Her line of questions was likely an odd one, who in their right mind would be so interested in the Forgotten Ones? She wanted to know, however. That little light inside of her wanting to understand like she used to. Felassan sat down next to the small fire that was slowly growing in front of him, “The Dalish remember only a few, they have little desire to dig up darker aspects of their history. The ones I have heard whispered by Keepers are Anaris, Daern’thal, Geldauran, Aseradiva and they like to say Fen’harel walked between the Forgotten Ones and the Evanuris. As he was both, or neither. No other names exist in their histories, as far as I have heard. It would truly be a terrible name to call them Forgotten Ones if they remembered them all, however.” His tone joking toward the end, she forced herself to give him an uneasy smile and a chuckle.

She noticed he qualified his words withthe Dalish believe, she wondered if he remembered more names. The fact that her own name was nestled within his list was not lost on her. A knot grew at the base of her throat and her heartbeat quickened. That is no longer my name. Huffing air through her nose, the remainder of his words slowly settled in her mind. Before she could help herself, her tone was defensive. Isathe felt offended by the implications as she declared, “Fen’harel was not one of the Forgotten Ones.” From what Felassan mentioned and what she experienced herself, he was the one to lock them away. He just happened to miss at least one. Even if this world felt broken and wrong, she still existed and he failed to wipe out her people entirely. The elf appeared surprised by her exclamation, “True. They believe many things that are not fact in our history. For one, they believe the Evanuris and Forgotten Ones were gods. They believed that the Dread Wolf locked away both out of spite and malice. They know nothing of the rebellion that led up to such events.”

Isathe’s body stiffened, they were remembered as gods? A bitter laugh escaped her, moving to drop the cut vegetables into the stew pot now that the water was bubbling. “They are thought of as gods? What are the Forgotten even gods of?” She felt sick again, sweat beading on her skin. Push through, you need to know. To understand. She had the incredible desire to wretch. Felassan watched her carefully for a few moments and she found she could not read the emotions that sat on his face. More humor in his tone as he answered her, “Well, the leader of the Forgotten Ones is believed to be Anaris. Daern’thal remembered as the god of nightmares and possession. So both assholes.” His name said aloud by another made her stomach ache, bile rising in her throat. She swallowed it down. “Geldauran is of hatred and malice.” Ah. They were seen as the worst of the elvhen, at least Daern’thal had not lied to her about that. She was corrupted, twisted and dark. Nothing more. No other use. Perhaps the Dalish were right. There were moments she felt her old self blossom but the emptiness when it disappeared hurt more each time. “Aseradiva is remembered as a god of desire and greed and as the wife to Daern’thal.” He paused before he continued, “They don’t like to say her name. They say directly invoking her name is dangerous because of her desire to take everything that is theirs.”

What? Isathe conceded there was a hunger within her that she could not push away entirely. It was a sweet hunger when she was a spirit. The one who wanted to learn and know, feel and touch. To experience. Twisted into the need to have and to own by the circumstances of her existence. But to be remembered as that? Only more grateful that the Forgotten Ones were believed to be hidden away, far from her.

Isathe nodded slowly, her voice was quiet, “Ah. I see.” Asking only formed new worries about her life in the world. Felassan did not appear to notice the darkness that sat inside of her. She could keep it at bay, learn to be herself again. Maybe. Someday. “I… am going to take a walk. Ma serannas.” Slowly lifting herself up off the ground, she wandered into the tree line before she heard him say anything at all. Once deep into the woods, she became sick on the forest floor. Isathe had to keep moving, her mind spiraled with the knowledge of her legacy. She would always be remembered as his. And dark. And evil. They were spirits of destruction and death, the antithesis of the bright and shining Evanuris. However, she knew they were just two sides of the same coin.

Far enough from the fire where she could no longer see its light reflecting off the trees, Isathe leaned against a tree, sliding down into the dirt. Quietly falling asleep while she listened to the breeze that rustled leaves above her, the night air smelling clean. You are almost free.

- - -

Felassan’s words only made her dreams roam toward the memories she would have rather forgotten. Most of the time she could direct her thoughts and her dreams but she found it increasingly more difficult to push out the painful memories that haunted her as they returned to the surface.

Isathe stood in a grand hall made of cream-colored stone and intricate details in gold. Two curved tables sat in the center of the room facing each other. She stood at the very left edge of the table, in the center of theirs was Anaris. He was adorned in black and silver finery, leaning back into the chair, picking his nails as if he were too bored to care what the elves in front of them had to say. To his left was Daern’thal, he placed a possessive hand on her lower back. The warmth of his palm through her thin dress only reminding her what little she wore for this particular gathering. Not that she had a choice. Daern’thal’s hand roamed from her back, slipping below the high slit of the dress and she tensed. If she did anything wrong, said anything wrong then that warm hand would be used for something far worse. To Anaris’ right was Nerien. That name had been forgotten with time, she would be the luckiest of them all.

Sitting at the table across from them were some members of the Evanuris. Intricate crowns and detailed armor created interesting silhouettes that Isathe found herself unable to look away from. A woman with dark hair and a crown that framed her face spoke first. Mythal. That was her name. She spoke with a commanding tone. The man to her right was referred to as Elgar’nan. He sat in equal standing with Mythal. Only two of the other Evanuris joined their talks, they had yet to introduce themselves. Elven servants walked into the room to pour wine for the Evanuris while they spoke, intricate designs tattooed on her faces. Curiosity bubbled within her, what were those for?

While she was distracted, Elgar’nan redirected the conversation, his gaze now trained on her, “Anaris did not allow you to introduce yourself. You are a new face to us.” He did not ask a question, not really. She was not granted time to speak because she was a thing. Only there to make their people appear more powerful. Isathe was a highly competent mage, Daern’thal encouraged her to allow her power to roll off of her, to help intimidate. The selective silence from the woman was also a ploy to hide the fear and pain that sat under the surface. Daern’thal spoke before she could, “This is my wife-” Elgar’nan interrupted the man and she felt his hand grip her waist savagely, his fingers digging into her skin. “Why not let your wife answer for herself.” Isathe’s voice was even despite her heartbeat thrumming inside of her. A perfected form of disassociation and detachment. It all hurt. Her hip hurt. Standing there hurt. “Aseradiva.” That was her name within their ranks, binding her once more to the man who held her so tightly it bruised. Isathe reminded herself that this was the deal. She could indulge her curiosity once this was all over. Daern’thal promised she could see the city bathed in gold and sunlight if she behaved.

She felt the gaze of the remaining Evanuris land on her as she spoke. Daern’thal pulled her onto his lap, his hands now roaming toward her thighs. Isathe let her white hair fall in front of her face to hide the disgust that settled on her features. Forcing a soft laugh, pulling herself together. The two sides of her spirit were at war with one another as his hand moved up the center of her thigh, under her dress. He is protecting you, you are safe. He owns you, you are not free.

After the display, Elgar’nan and Mythal removed their attention from her and she could breath finally, she felt her body shaking. The remainder of the discussion was on possible peace talks between the two groups of elves. They did not state as much but with the Evanuris in the middle of a rebellion caused by one of their very own, she assumed they did not have the energy to continue to track them down as well. Maybe I can sit in the sun again. She missed it. That was the only reason he hid her away, to protect her from them.

Anaris was increasingly antagonistic with each passing moment. It took her far too long to realize he had no intention of stopping. Whatever anger that drove him caused him to dismiss and demean every chance at peace. What was worth so much that the lives of their very people were not enough? They deferred to him however, even Daern’thal did. The power that exuded from the man was enchanting, she found herself often stepping away if he were too near. Maybe that was it, that darkness within him that he embraced. Whatever twisted form it took, he reveled in it while she actively tried to push hers away.

Mythal was stoic during the taunts and hostility that dropped from Anaris’ mouth. Elgar’nan grew more hostile with each breath. The room shook with the two men’s anger. They were granted safe passage into the city but that would be all. There would be no ceasefire during their rebellion. And now the Evanuris knew their names and faces.

Their departure was swift and Isathe knew that she would not be seeing the golden city that day. He promised. Her curiosity was once again denied and pushed aside. She felt the anger rise within her and the moment they stepped through the doors to their shared chambers she made a horrible misstep. Isathe actually spoke up to him, reminding him that he promised her curiosity. She knew it was not logical to pine for it, to bring it up in the aftermath of all that happened. They had no reason to remain there but he promised. Resentment continued to build within her and she allowed the darker form of desire, that hunger to unleash at the man standing in front of her. She found herself pinned up against the wall, Daern'thal holding her up by her neck.

Right. Physical bodies needed air. Her vision grew fuzzy the longer her held her up, “Do you wish to say that to me again? I protect you from those who would harm you. Those who would use your naivety to take advantage of you. And you are upset that I do not let you roam as you wish? You belong to me.” The last words hissed through clenched teeth before he released her and she slid down the wall, stumbling.

His hand grabbed her by the arm, pulling her back to her feet before pushing her towards the bed. She kept repeating in her head. He is my protector, he is my savior.

- - -

A soft voice stirred her from her dreams. “Aseradiva… Aseradiva?” Right, her name. “Please, I cannot.” She heard her voice beg, it cracked and she felt broken. Wait. This wasn't right. The voice wasn’t angry and biting against her ear as she was roughly woken up from her dreams. It spoke softly, hesitant. Her eyes flew open to see Felassan standing above her. Her memory slowly knit itself back together, she had fallen asleep in the woods. Isathe’s gaze met Felassan’s and then she noticed he was holding her mask in his hand. A mask of a Forgotten One.

[maabelasdaruth]

I want to start a list of people who Amelin Lavellan recruits to the Inquisition after Corephyus' falls but before Trespasser when she will disbanded the Inquisition, not everyone is recruited (because spys) but specifically those people who she consults with to deal with the threat posed by the dread wolf (without telling them that's the issue YET)

1) Felassan, found tranquil and recruited to inquisition, given choice to learn enchanting or undergo reversal of tranquility

2) Merrill, another eluvian expert, not recruited to Inquisition (she's vital where she is) but contacted through Varric and a correspondence is shared through letters until they can meet in person post Trespasser (finally another Dalish first who has dealt with spirits/demons and might understand)

3) Emmrich Volkarin, Cassandra helps with the introductions (more her name than her, it's Josie doing the negotiating) but she's introduced to the Mortalitasi and specifically seeks out the Mourn Watch and Emmrich initially over questions about the fade rifts affects on the Necropolis. She makes plans to visit sometime after Trespasser (and might end up dating/situationship with the professor for a bit but that's conjecture) but Nevara is a lower priority than number 4 and 5

4) Rivani Seer, she's obsessed with Rivain (would have gone there immediately if her and Amelin had remained two people) so she keeps in contact with the mages who helped get Cole his necklace and visits there soon after Trespasser, after visiting home Wycome (and her clan), she goes to Antiva to see Josie, then Rivain where she stays a while

5) Hero of Fereldan, Ciara Cousland is also Queen of Ferelden, she goes here first after the events of Trespasser are resolved, (jokes on Arl Tegan for thinking she'd go away if you took her Inquisition) but her offer is to be a temporary magical advisor to the throne. I want her and Ciara conspiring together so badly! Also in my canon playthrough the ritual to create a child wasn't just to produce Kieran but also produced the current heir to the throne, a daughter whose name is in flux. But Ciara knew that the blight would make it hard to impossible for her to produce an heir (responsibility as Queen consort) so when Morrigan was like, I have an option where neither you or your husband die and it will produce a child, Ciara is like "YES AND you need to do it to me too", so threesome with Ciara/Morrigan/Alistair produces two children that night and now Ciara is stuck with her daughter and only heir being a mage who cannot inherit if that becomes wildly known. So Ciara whose always had an fascination with magic will accept the Inquisitor as an advisor and begin to sync a lot of their information as they both prepare for the possibility of a double blight in seven years time, (also the possibility of the veil actually falling.)

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

Here's mine!

Rook: Juniper Aldwir, a dalish elf mage, I mostly went for the direct/aggressive dialogue options with a few of the more positive/nicer or joke-y options in companion convos. I went with the spellblade specialization and ended up loving it after a rough mage start. I also played arcane warrior/knight enchanter my first DAO and DAI runs though so. lmao. i have a type.

Faction: Veil jumpers! How could I not go with the scientific study of weird magic group... I've decided she's more on the geography and cartography side of the profession rather than mechanics/tinkering like Bellara, which is why she's not the one fixing the broken objects you encounter herself. I imagine she's the one drawing maps of all the places you go, making notes of interesting landmarks/items, etc. the crossroads drives her insane (bc it drives ME insane) because of the weird half reality half fade logic to the locations, travel, etc.

Companions/NPCs: My go to companion squad was Lucanis and Davrin or Taash for the best combos/fighting, and Emmrich because I enjoyed his comments/character a lot too. NPC wise, of course finally seeing FELASSAN!!! was great and he got so much more content and dialogue than I expected. was cheering every time i found another codex entry from him, and the Betrayal fight ruled. otherwise, like most everyone else i LOOOOVEEEE Teai & Viagos Divorced Energy... i'm obsessed. And then Antoine & Evka for actually wholesome, and Vorgoth bc idk wtf is up there but its sexy. but also THE CARETAKER what IS it... i have so many questions... that i will be filling in with weird headcanons probably. I also liked listening in on the two fledgling crows on the balcony who have a ton of unique banters, and a couple other npc banter points idk how to describe lmao. Some of the spirit ones in the crossroads I wish we got more of.

Romance: Lucanis my BELOVED obviously i am doing... an insane amount of lucanisposting lately... yeah I've got the full brainworms. even though the game itself was lacking in content my neurons are instead working overtime to try to fill in everything the game left out

Major decisions: I saved Treviso because Minrathous JUST had its turn being saved, shouldn't they like??? be mobilizing the ARMY they actually have over there by now??? they should have been better prepared idk what else to say. insane it got hit a 3rd time at the end anyway so i stand by my choice in picking Antiva. As for the companion endings, I felt most didn't really make a difference to me, with the exception of Emmrich. I kept manfred on this run becuase I was NOT ready to say goodbye to my gentle skeleton son 😭 next game i will romance Emmrich and make him a lich tho. As for the ending... I sent Harding to lead the second squad and Neve was the one who got mirror-kidnapped. Whcih did leave for an absolutely devastating post-Nightmare-In-Dreamland fade sequence where Rook suddenly had NONE of the companions she started the game with. Getting hit with losing Harding, losing Neve, and then the realization that Varric had been dead the whole time definitely makes for some angsty roleplay opportunity, though I do wanna replay it with Bellara in the final position just so I can watch her stand up to the gods, because i think that'd be pretty great. Ending-wise: I'm a Solavellan fool who's been pining for a real life decade now almost so I of course went for that lmao. I will play through all the other options just for the drama of it all, and probably come up with some adjusted exact sequence for how things go as a headcanon, but yeah.

again pls feel free to reblog & add yours, i've really liked reading about the couple who've answered so far :))))

ok i know ive been doing a lot of bitching about the game etc but putting that aside for a moment. Now that more people have finished Veilguard, I'm curious about people's first playthroughs!

What kind of Rook did you make (lineage, class, dialogue personality options, etc)?

What faction did you play as?

Fave companions and npc's?

Who did you romance?

The major choices--what'd you do? (which city, saved, notable companion routes you strongly prefer, what went down in act 3 and endgame...)

Any particular missions/lore you were excited about?

you don't have to be a mutual to reply to/reblog this! im just curious what we all veered to for the first run. i'm doing a second one now making different choices but it's interesting to compare people's first instincts.

[aarongoldenwrites]

Alright. Get ready for a trip. I'm gonna go point by point through this because I'm obsessed with these games, I dig the real world connotations, and the new trailer just dropped and I haven't played any DA since the flood. So...

We need to start with a discussion of Solas in general. He's Fen'Harel, the Dread Wolf. He fought against institutionalized and systemic slavery, freed his people, and fought alone against corrupt being powerful enough to be considered gods (and they are the old gods of the Tevinter Imperium, I believe, but that's a whole other thing). He created the veil and imprisoned the gods, possibly in Black City, and doing so nearly killed him and sent him into a thousand year coma. He didn't understand the consequences of his actions, but he trusted people enough not to mess it up further.

And then he woke up.

Let us start with the Qun. The Qun is fascism. Individual Qunari are fascinating individuals, especially when they are removed from the Qun as a whole – Sten and the Iron Bull being our prime examples. But everything we know about them paints them as fanatics that torture mages and lobotomize anyone that doesn't accept their philosophy. Their entire culture is systemic slavery, which is the very thing Solas opposed. Of course he hates them.

There's two instances that can change his mind: one is a possible Qunari Inquisitor, but your Inquisitor is Vashoth (edit 2020/09/03: as noted by @felassan -- thanks!), someone who was never part of the Qun. He's not been awake long enough to see it, and it shocks him out of binary thinking. He's apologizing badly, because he's personally a social disaster who doesn't know how to people (and we'll get to that). The second is if you choose to save the Chargers; Solas turns around on the Bull instantly, shows genuine concern towards him, and helps him deal with Fade-related PTSD.

In fact, all he ever wants to do is teach. If he comes out and says he's Fen'Harel people are going to assume he's a crackpot, but I think Solas, as a persona, is actually who he is. He jokes with the Bull and Blackwall about his Fade knowledge, and offers them both knowledge on how to kill fade spirits more efficiently. All three of them respect one another as soldiers. He compares knowledge of magic and history with Dorian, Cassandra seeks his opinion on organization and faith, Josephine appreciates his insight, Leliana asks his advice, and Varric and he chatter and shoot the shit.

He constantly tries to teach or learn. The only two people he has issues with are Sera and Vivienne, and even there he tries to offer advice and wisdom as best he's able. Sera can't stand him because she hates elves, and Viv is a victim of the Circle and can't imagine a world without an entrenched power structure, regardless of how many people it hurts.

And I suppose that's a thing a lot of people have trouble with when it comes to Solas: he tells you straight out at the end of Trespasser that he's going to tear down the Veil and destroy the world as we know it. And that's terrible. That's destroying a world state and trying to return thing to how they were, kind of like how the Inquisitor and Dorian reset time in Redcliffe. I mean, that world was a hellscape where everything you ever cared about was dead or corrupted, and fixing it was the right call. It's not at all like how the world Solas wakes up to is a hellscape where everything he ever cared about was dead or corrupted. Fixing it is the right call?

And we could argue that the future that we averted was a monstrous place, but how does Solas see his own world? His people worship the slavers he defeated and die with a terrible frequency. Elves die and face fates that are about as terrible as that faced by mages; he's fucked coming and going. And we know he went to the Dalish and tried to talk to them and they attacked him. Why wouldn't they? He knows about what's happening outside of the Plato's cave that the Dalish are dying in.

His actions are going to kill thousands. His actions are going to save millions. The Dalish are dying in droves and the city elves are going to follow. Giving them a fighting chance at survival means reminding them who they are.

He also tells us that waking up was like “swimming in tranquil”. I think creating the Veil crippled the elves in some way, and he's not trying to give them magic so much as he's trying to heal them of a disease he inadvertently created. And while I know it's hard to take him at his word, it shouldn't be: he lies by omission once (about being Fen'harel, as we've covered the reasons why already), and lies directly twice.

After Orlais, he talks about how much he missed intrigue and court. If you ask him about this, he stumbles and you get disapproval – the only time you get disapproval for asking him a question. He lets his guard down around you and still doesn't know what to do.

The last time is in Crestwood and only happens if you romance him. He's about to tell you who he is and he chickens out and tells you about the slave marks on your face instead. Because – and this is the important thing – he cares. He's viciously selfless; he doesn't believe he deserves happiness and he can't imagine a world where he can save his people and be happy.

Make no mistake: the elves are threatened with extinction with the world as it is. The city elves in Origins are blamed when they react to some of their number being raped and killed by human nobles. The Dalish in Origins can be wiped out by the werewolves. The Dalish in Awakening are wiped out regardless of what you do. The Dalish in DA2 can be wiped out in Act 3. The city elves in Kirkwall are hunted for sport, see their children kidnapped and raped before being murdered, are locked away and left to burn whenever there's any problem at all. Three different Dalish clans can be wiped out in Inquisition, and it's so easy for Lavellen to lose her clan.

The status quo is killing the elves. It is wiping them out. This is an existential threat that no one is doing anything about, except Solas.

He's also lonely.

He says he was derided by his enemies also when he offered to share his knowledge of the Fade. We took this to mean the Dalish before Trespasser, but given who he is, we can speculate that he's talking about the old elven gods. But if his enemies derided them, that means his allies did, too. His old allies still saw him as a madman and a fool, probably because he was one man standing against an empire. He clearly couldn't trust anyone in the old days, and even tells Sera he had to sacrifice some of those closest to him for fear of betrayal.

Consider that the Inquisition was the first time he had friends. No one knows him as anything other than the elven apostate hobo with bad fashion sense and a weird relationship with spirits, but, as mentioned, he has mostly good relationships with everyone. People rely on him. They like him. Lavellan potentially loves him, and he loves her.

You change his mind on the Qunari race (but not their culture). You show him that he was wrong and he accepts that with good grace and moves on; he keeps coming to the Inquisitor afterwards because he respects you and he does not want to do what he sees as the only way to avoid genocide. I don't think he ever stops feeling bad about any of the things he's gotten wrong; he wears his mistakes like a chain and tries to do better, never stops trying to do better, but his perspective and capability are so much greater than anything the Warden, the Champion, or even the Inquisitor currently understands.

And I wouldn't be surprised if we get a chance to fold him back into the party at some point. I think the actual villain of the series lies with the monsters the Evanuris fought against and were corrupted by.

I think the actual villains are the Forgotten Ones, and I think they are the Blight, and I think they are what lies in the corruption we know as Red Lyrium.      

[pikapeppa]

I’m new to the fandom and I need to ask this, sorry if I sound dumb lmao but who is felassan?????

Not a dumb question at all, and welcome to the fandom! 🎉

Non-spoiler answer:

Felassan is a character who is not in any of the games, which is why you don’t know about him. He’s a main character from The Masked Empire, which is a novel by Patrick Weekes that takes place before the events of Inquisition. You know the mission Wicked Eyes, Wicked Hearts from Inquisition, where you have to run around the Winter Palace like a fucking idiot try to prevent an assassination of Empress Celene? The novel basically explains why that mission is interesting. It explains how the Orlesian civil war arose and why Gaspard and Celene are feuding, and also why Briala is trying covertly to take them both down. 

Felassan is (IMO) the most interesting character in The Masked Empire. He is an elf and a close companion and mentor of Briala, and Briala believes that he is Dalish. His name in Elvhen means ‘slow arrow’, and it is a reference to a fable about Fen’Harel that he tells Briala during the course of the novel. 

There is a small (BUT MIGHTY) number of people in the fandom who are obsessed with him for a few reasons - he’s an amazing character, for one. He’s funny, teasing, intelligent, intense, and mysterious. Here’s a sample line from The Masked Empire:  

If his cloak slipped off and the tattoos on his face were revealed, every elf in the marketplace would either throw themselves at his feet or draw blades to fight this creature out of legend. And for all that, he didn’t bother to put on boots, and he wore clothes that would better suit a woodsman than a living myth. He told bad jokes and refused to take anything in the world of men seriously. [Briala] wondered if that was why he moved through the world untouched.

Secondly, there is some ambiguity about his role/status/location in Thedas by the time the events of Inquisition are going on, but I won’t say more about this unless you want spoilers, which are below the cut - and below this bonus fan art of Felassan, by the insanely talented @elbenherzart! 

SPOILER answer -- don’t read if you plan on reading The Masked Empire:

Felassan is actually an ancient elf from Solas’s time and one of Solas’s trusted agents. During the course of the novel, it’s revealed that he had a special mission from Solas: to obtain control over the eluvian network. You probably remember from the Trespasser DLC that Solas mentions that he had an agent who was supposed to obtain control over the eluvians, but that “he did not succeed”. That agent was Felassan. Toward the end of The Masked Empire, Briala had control over the eluvians, and Felassan decided to not take control of them, and instead leaves this power with Briala. In other words, he betrays Solas by purposely failing to complete his task. At the end of the novel, Felassan (who is a somniari - a dreamer mage) steps into the Fade and is confronted by a shadowy figure, whom he tells that the people of current-time Thedas as “stronger than you think”. He is then killed by the shadowy figure, who is, in fact, Solas. 

The ambiguity I mentioned before comes from the fact that Felassan was killed in the Fade, not in the ‘real world’. As per Dragon Age canon, people who are killed in the Fade become Tranquil in the real world; they don’t die. (See Feynriel’s quest in DA2.) So there is a possibility that in current-day Thedas, Felassan could be Tranquil, not dead. Of the same token, if anyone has the power to kill someone for good while they’re in the Fade, it’s Solas. 

Patrick and Karin Weekes (stellar DA writers) have confirmed that there is a possibility that Felassan could come back, for the reasons outlined above. WHICH IS WHY THOSE OF US WHO LOVE THE BARK-EATING BOYFRIEND ARE ON A CAMPAIGN TO SHOW HOW MUCH WE LOVE HIM SO HE CAN HOPEFULLY COME BACK. 

I hope this answer is satisfactory, dear anon! And welcome!

- Your friendly neighbourhood Pikapeppa xoxo

[mrs-gauche]

Another year, another Christmas I need to reblog this again to reinforce my wish. lol

However, this year I'd like to add a few random things to my personal Christmas wish list that I've always hoped would make a comeback in DA4 (listed in no particular order):

Griffons (!!)

bard songs, Lost Elf Theme and/or the Grey Warden Song

Felassan (whatever it takes to bring you back, I'll do it)

Children (and no, I don't mean those horrifying creatures from Awakening, I mean like, actual children that were notably absent from Thedas in DAI? 😂 Am I weird for listing that? lol)

CLOAKS and CAPES (for those who don't know me, I'm kind of obsessed and most of the concept art looks SO promising w(ﾟДﾟ)w)

lots of weird magical stuff again like the rhyming Grand Oak in DAO <3

improved. camerawork. *sob*

Guess we have to wait until next summer for this Santa to arrive, but for now, merry christmas to those who celebrate and happy holidays everyone! 😁❤️

Ok but am I the only one who read the Mortalitasi’s tale in the last chapter of Tevinter Nights and now needs at least one scene in DA4 where Solas just summons his entire friggin spirit army and charges into battle like Aragorn in The Return of the King??

[asomniari]

SHIPPING INFO !!

Answer the following for your muse so people know how shipping works on your blog.

WHAT IS YOUR OTP FOR YOUR CHARACTER?:

As if y’all don’t know that I am a total and complete sucker for felavellan.

WHAT ARE YOU WILLING TO WRITE WHEN IT COMES TO SHIPPING?:

I am down for everything except things like abuse. I’m not gonna write my character hitting somebody unless it’s a backyard brawl between enemies. However if you wanna write smut I am more than willing to do it, if you can put up with me being a total dork about it.

HOW LARGE DOES THE AGE GAP HAVE TO BE TO MAKE IT UNCOMFORTABLE?:

Most of the time, I’m okay with an age gap (key word: most of the time). If it’s a 60 year old hitting on a 19 year old, I’m gonna have to draw the line in the sand. If the character is under/over half the age of the other person, then it gets weird. My otp has a giant age gap like that, but it was (kinda poorly tbh) addressed in the canon. So basically don’t make the younger character out to be a baby if they’re an actual adult.

ARE YOU SELECTIVE WHEN SHIPPING?:

No. Lol. You should see me on my forum, someone even mentions a ship and i’m already into it. But for Felassan, yes.

HOW FAR DO STEAMY MOMENTS HAVE TO GO BEFORE THEY ARE CONSIDERED NS/FW?:

When they start taking their clothes off and start touching genitals then it’s nsfw

WHO ARE OTHER THE CHARACTERS YOU SHIP YOUR CHARACTER WITH?:

@youriinquisitorialness. Obviously... But also I appreciate the ship thing with @valorcorrupt even though they’re a train wreck.

DOES ONE HAVE TO ASK TO SHIP WITH YOU?:

Yes?????????

HOW OFTEN DO YOU LIKE TO SHIP?:

I’m so terrible. I have so many ships with Ori and we keep making more. I love having ships, I collect them for fun and to keep me from losing my mind from schoolwork.

ARE YOU SHIP OBSESSED OR SHIP MORE-OR-LESS?:

Yes.

ARE YOU MULTISHIP?:

I’m not a multiship on this blog. Only ships I will take are past relationships that are over by my current timeline.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SHIP IN YOUR CURRENT FANDOM?:

I do appreciate Female Inquisitor with Josephine.

FINALLY, HOW DOES ONE SHIP WITH YOU?:

You have to be my friend first. I don’t ship with strangers or acquaintances. So what that means is, you have to have been writing with me so I have time to get to know you as a person before I even start to decide on whether or not we can ship. Cause writing your character already in love with mine is just weird unless there was some kind of discussion about it. Stealing that note from Ruddy, honestly. Some people don’t have good shipping canon, and other times you jump into a ship but it just doesn’t work out at all and is no fun.

Tagged by: @bladestruck

Tagging: @youriinquisitorialness @valorcorrupt @theharellan @archontem

[pikapeppa]

About me!

Some info for my followers both new and old! 

The original content posted here is my own fanfic, any shitty art that I make, and beautiful GOOD art made for me either as gifts, trades, or commissions. You can find my fic here on AO3 or here on Tumblr. 

The content I reblog is 90% others' art, and 10% memes/meta/funny shitposts. I reblog mostly Dragon Age content, with a handful of other fandoms as well, especially Mass Effect and Horizon Zero Dawn. 

I am obsessed with MANY fictional characters and love interests, and my blog focuses mainly on the following characters: Fenris, Solas, Cole, Blackwall, Abelas, Felassan, Sten, Garrus Vakarian, Aria T'Loak, Reyes Vidal, and Nil from Horizon Zero Dawn. 

I rarely reblog other people's writing because I have no time to read other people's work. If I do reblog someone else's writing, it will be because I have actually read it – a rare miracle! 

Representation in media is important. Women, BIPOC, and LGBTQ+ need to be represented more in TV, movies, videogames, and absolutely in fanfic and fan art. I would love to represent these categories more on my blog, and am making active efforts to do so. If you have suggestions for creators to follow and promote, please let me know!

I am a cis-het mixed-race woman, and it is often assumed that I am white. Given these identities, I do have biases, and I am not always aware of how these biases affect my behaviour. To this end, I have made mistakes. I will likely make mistakes again. If I post, reblog, or comment offensively, please DM me or message me on Discord to let me know. I promise that I'm not scary and I don't bite - so please feel free to slide into my DMs! 

To be clear: it is no one's job to educate me, and I will do the work to educate myself. But if I'm unaware of a mistake I've made, I can't fix it, so again: please DM me to let me know!

Final note: it may take me a couple of days to reply to you, but I promise I will respond. Please be patient with me, and we'll speak soon! 

Please do not reply or reblog! Replies and reblogs will be deleted.

- Love from your friendly neighbourhood Pikapeppa xoxo

[pikapeppa]

Felassan/f!Lavellan: Complicated

Chapter 8 of The Love That Grows From Violence (Felassan x Tamaris Lavellan) is up on AO3! I’m a couple chapters ahead of my posting schedule and starting to get confused about what’s been posted and what hasn’t so here enjoy another early chapter sorry

~6390 words; read here on AO3 instead.

**********************

Tamaris slept poorly that night.

Her head was buzzing with a jumbled mixture of thoughts. Felassan was at the forefront of them, naturally; her unruly mind kept reminding her of his playful tone when he teased her and the spine-tingling sound he made when they kissed, and the darkness behind her eyelids was put to shame by the memory of the lambent magic and lust in his eyes after she’d leaned away from his lips. 

He made her uneasy. 

No, that wasn’t fair; Felassan wasn’t doing anything to make her feel uneasy, and she was undeniably attracted to him. But somehow, that seemed to be the problem. It was the attraction that was making her feel uneasy. Her desire was diluted by some kind of weird trepidation that she was not at all accustomed to. She was drawn to Felassan, with his shit-eating smirk and his casual stories and his warm amethyst eyes. But when she thought too hard about getting more intimate with him, something inside of her quailed. 

It was fucking frustrating. She hadn’t had this same kind of internal push-and-pull before sleeping with Bull, so why was it different with Felassan? 

Furthermore, why was she obsessing about this when nothing should be happening between her and Felassan anyway? No matter what he said, his lust couldn’t genuinely be focused on her. It was the Tranquility cure and nothing more, so the point was moot. 

So why the fuck was she still awake over this? 

Felassan wasn’t the only problem keeping her awake, though. She was also anxious at the thought of the mana-building exercises that she was supposed to help him with in the morning. It had been years since she’d done the exercises that Solas had taught her. Not only was she rusty at them, but she wasn’t sure how well she’d be able to teach them to Felassan. 

If Tamaris was totally honest, though, it wasn’t just her long hiatus or the teaching situation that concerned her; it was the thought of doing something that would be such a visceral reminder of Solas. There was a reason she’d stopped doing these exercises, after all. 

As it turned out, that visceral reminder came sooner than Tamaris liked. In her haste to escape from Felassan earlier tonight, she’d forgone their usual nightly ritual of a cup of dream-blocking tea. So of course, as sheer luck and fucking irony would have it, this was the night that she had to dream of him when she finally fell into a fitful sleep. 

She narrowed her eyes at the six-eyed wolf from atop the battlements at Skyhold. No matter how far away he was, whether it was the Frostback Basin or the Hissing Wastes or some strange verdant land she’d never seen before, it never felt quite far enough. 

She glared viciously at him but didn’t say a word; she had never been able to find the right words to say during these rare and fragmented dreams. Instead of trying to speak to him — or more accurately, to yell at him — Tamaris had somehow decided that if she stared at him for long enough, she’d figure it out. If she kept her eyes on him, forcing him to meet her furious gaze, then maybe she’d finally see.

When she woke up the next morning, however, her half-awake mind was already losing the fragments of dream that she’d collected, and she could no longer remember what it was that she was trying to see in the first place. All she could remember was the impression of a sad and watchful wolf.

The unwanted dream of Solas, contrasted with the very wanted and oddly intimidating memory of kissing Felassan… it felt like too much to cope with first thing in the morning, especially with her usual awful morning headache. She was of half a mind to avoid Felassan by foregoing breakfast to sit on the roof and smoke instead, but she ultimately decided against it; avoiding him would just make her seem both churlish and childish. 

It was thus a very surly Tamaris who made her way down the stairs for breakfast. 

As usual, Felassan was lounging on his nest of silk cushions in front of the fireplace with This Shit Is Weird. Without saying anything to him, Tamaris went to the kitchen to fetch her breakfast. When she came to sit at her usual spot at the dining table, Felassan looked up.

His lips were curled with a knowing smile. Tamaris wilted slightly and dropped her eyes to her plate of fruit-and-creme-filled crȇpes. He was totally within his rights to say something about her abrupt departure from the roof last night — she had acted like a complete ass, after all — but that didn’t mean she was prepared to talk about it.

“I have a question for you,” he said.

She slumped even further and popped a bite of crȇpe in her mouth. “Mm?” she mumbled.

To her surprise, he didn’t ask about last night. Instead, he tapped the book in his hand. “The orb. The one that Fen’Harel gave to Corypheus. He doesn’t have it, does he?”

She relaxed slightly and swallowed her food. “No. It broke when we were defeating Corypheus. It was an accident, but I’m fucking glad now that it broke.”

Felassan nodded. “I suspected as much. I wonder where we would be now if it hadn’t broken?” He rose to his feet and came to sit beside her.

“We’d be dead, obviously,” she drawled. “He’d have ripped down the Veil by now if he had that stupid orb.”

“I wonder,” he said thoughtfully.

She looked up from her delicious crȇpes. “You really think he wouldn’t have done it? Seriously?”

“He hasn’t done it yet,” Felassan replied. He poured a cup of tea from the enchanted teapot on the table.

Tamaris eyed him incredulously. What was he trying to imply? “He probably doesn’t have the power. Which is fucking terrifying, really, considering what he was like when I last saw him.”

Felassan slid the cup of tea over to her, and she raised her eyebrows. “What, no coffee?”

He smiled at her. “We’ve been living together for barely more than a week, and already you’re a pampered princess?”

She blinked at him, then snorted. “Shit, you’re right. I’m sorry. These are amazing, by the way.” She tapped her fork lightly on her plate.

“Thank you,” he said graciously. “Drink that tea. It’s medicinal.”

She raised her eyebrows. “Is this the tea for my withdrawal?”

“Indeed,” he said. “Chock full of fresh herbs: your favourite.”

His smile was endearingly mischievous. She huffed and offered him a little smile in return. “You really do pamper me, you know.”

“If pampering you brings the rare beauty of a smile to your face, consider yourself perpetually pampered,” he replied smoothly. 

She snorted and rolled her eyes. Despite his flirtation, she was starting to feel as relaxed as she usually did in his presence. There was nothing expectant or heavy behind the usual mischief in his eyes, and they’d been sitting here together for a good few minutes now without him bringing up the kiss. Maybe he was going to let her off the hook about it.

She lifted the cup to her lips and took a little sip, then grimaced. “Is this supposed to taste awful?”

He tsked. “Yes, Tamaris. Put some honey in it.”

“No, it’s fine,” she said. “It feels more medicinal without honey to cover the taste.”

He smiled faintly. “Wise of you. The good things in life don’t always come in the sweetest packages.”

She glanced at him. His tone was light and breezy, but his gaze was a bit pensive now as he surveyed her. 

She dropped her eyes to her plate and took too big a sip of the tea, scalding her tongue in the process. Felassan, in the meantime, turned the conversation back to Solas. “So Fen’Harel had acquired additional power in the time between his departure and your meeting again. Power enough to remove the mark from your hand, it seems.”

His words were a statement, but Tamaris could see the question in his face. She sipped the tea again and gave him an arch look. “Aren’t you afraid I’ll spoil the ending of This Shit Is Weird if I answer your question?”

He grinned. “Terrified. I do love a good surprise ending. But I’ll forgo the surprise in this case.”

She sighed and cut another piece of crȇpe. “Yes. He was way more powerful when I saw him last than when he was with us. Petrifying qunari and setting off huge explosions…” The memory sent a shiver down her spine. “He must have done a lot of fancy fucking Fadewalking during the time he was off plotting our collective murders.”

Felassan nodded slowly and tapped his fingers idly on the table, and Tamaris paused with a bite of crȇpe halfway to her mouth. “You know something about how he got so powerful, don’t you?” she asked.

“I have a theory, but… I honestly cannot say for sure,” he said.

Tamaris lifted an eyebrow. “Are you going to tell me the theory?”

“Aren’t you afraid I’ll spoil the ending?” he said teasingly.

She gave him a flat look and wiggled her metal fingers. “This is the fucking ending, Felassan.”

He chuckled. “You make a strong point. I will tell you if you wish, but I would actually recommend that you be patient with me and let me read more of that book first.”

“Why?” she said suspiciously.

“Because at this point, it’s as fantastical a theory as a fire-breathing nug with halla’s feet,” he said. “I might as well read to you from a children’s book.”

Tamaris exhaled in annoyance, and Felassan lifted his eyebrows. “I’ll tell you, if you like. But I might end up being incorrect later.”

She stared hard at him for a moment longer, then relented and picked up her fork and knife. “Fine. Then tell me something you do know for sure.”

“Such as?”

She cut another piece of crȇpe. “Tell me… tell me what it was like for you when you first woke up.”

He chuckled. “Ah, when I first woke up, ever so long ago. All right. I mentioned to you that I was woken about twenty-five years ago. I—”

“Wait,” she interrupted. “Woken? You were woken up?”

“Yes,” he said.

“By what?” she asked.

He raised one eyebrow. “You mean by whom.”

His expression was rueful, and Tamaris gaped at him. “Did… wait. Solas woke you? But — how is that possible? He was in uthenara too!”

“Yes,” Felassan said, “but uthenara is…” He paused and let out a soft exhale. “It may be one of the most subtle magics from our time, and the formation of the Veil made it… complicated. But suffice it to say that those in the long sleep of uthenara are able to communicate with others within the Fade.”

She raised her eyebrows. This was very strange to think about, but she supposed it made sense, especially for a somniari like Solas who had more mastery of the Fade than the real world. “Okay. Go on.”

“Fen’Harel came to me in the Fade when it was my turn to walk this world.”

Tamaris interrupted again. “Your turn?” she said. 

He tilted his head chidingly. “If you allow me to tell the tale, I’m fairly sure I’ll answer any questions you have.”

She made a little face. “Right, right. Sorry.”

He settled back in his chair and folded his hands comfortably over his abdomen. “Fen’Harel roused me from my refreshing nap about twenty-five years ago, when it was my turn to begin gathering information in this world. I’m by no means the only ancient elf to stroll inconspicuously among the shems, you see.” He waved his hand carelessly. “There were hundreds of us, all with a singular goal: to gather information for Fen’Harel here in this world while he gathered what he could from the spirits who observed this world from the other side.”

Tamaris couldn’t help herself; she interrupted him again. “There were hundreds of you?”

He gave her a reproving little smirk. “May I continue the story?”

She tsked impatiently. “Yes, yes. Go on.”

“There were hundreds of us,” he said, “spread over several thousand years — so we were more scarce than you are thinking, I’m sure. We were woken in waves to take our turns gathering information for as long as we could before our time came to an end.”

She frowned slightly. “You mean… you mean before you died?”

He nodded an acknowledgement. “I just had the fortune of being woken shortly before things got exciting.”

She huffed quietly. ‘Exciting’ was one way to put the shitshow of the past couple of decades. “Are there other ancient elves running around now?”

“Most certainly,“ he said. “But I can’t say exactly who they are. Only Fen’Harel knew who he was going to rouse and when.”

She frowned more deeply. “So… but… you never tried to find other ancient elves since you woke up?”

 “We were instructed to work alone so as not to arouse suspicion,” he explained.

Tamaris snorted. “A strange elf all on his own is pretty fucking suspicious, don’t you think?”

Felassan chuckled. “You are not wrong, avise. Nevertheless, those were our orders.”

She shook her head. “That’s… pretty shitty.”

“Is it?” he said mildly. “How so?”

“It must have been lonely,” she said. “Working on your own for all that time.”

A hint of softness entered his expression. “It could be, at times. Hence the hobbies.” He gestured at the pot of tea with a smirk. “But we all wanted what Fen’Harel wanted. We were committed, and we trusted his judgment. And so I did as he asked, right up until I didn’t.”

Tamaris nodded slowly and thought this over while she finished her breakfast. When only her tea was left, she crossed her legs and picked up her cup. “Maybe there was another reason he didn’t want you to meet with the others.”

“What reason is that?” Felassan asked.

“Maybe he didn’t want you to start talking amongst yourselves and change your minds about helping him.”

Felassan’s expression lifted into a broad smile. “You know Fen’Harel better than you think,” he said.

She raised her eyebrows. “Do you think that’s really why he kept you apart, then?”

He leaned back in his chair and folded his arms. “I have considered that. I even confronted him about it once, but he seemed… genuinely shocked at the suggestion. If it was his intent, he either hid it very well, or he wasn’t even aware of the intent.”

Tamaris scoffed. “You know what, I fucking believe it.”

“You believe what?” he asked. “That he hid his true motive, or was unaware of it?”

“Both,” she said. “Either. He’s always been convoluted that way.”

Felassan’s beautiful smile grew even wider. Then he let out one of those rolling laughs that made her heart flip. “I like this,” he said warmly. 

“What?” she said faintly. 

“Talking about him with you,” Felassan said.

She huffed in amusement and brought her cup to her lips. “Say what you really mean. You’re enjoying shit-talking him with someone who also knew him well.”

“Don’t act as though you aren’t enjoying it too,” he retorted.

She shrugged and sipped her tea, but she couldn’t help but smile in response to his mirth-filled tone. “All right, yes. I am,” she admitted. “It’s nice to have someone else to be a petty bitch with.”

He chuckled, then gave her a fond look. “You really do think you are a bitch, don’t you?”

“I am a bitch. There’s no ‘thinking’ about it,” she said. She shrugged again and idly swirled her tea. “It’s not always a bad thing. I got a lot done in the Inquisition by being a bitch. And when it backfired, well… that’s what having a spymaster and a pretty human ambassador are for.”

“You must have been something to see,” Felassan said. 

She glanced at him. His smile was soft and his eyes were warm, and she got stuck in them for a moment before a wriggle of anxiety in her belly made her look away.

She swallowed hard. “Look, I… I didn’t ask you about the waking-up thing because I wanted to talk about him.”

His face slackened with surprise. “Oh. Should I not have brought him up? We’d spoken of him before, so I thought–“

“No no, that’s not what I mean,” she said hastily. “I just meant I… I was wondering what it was like for you to wake up here alone. Solas briefly mentioned what it was like for him. I wanted to know what it was like for you.”

“You wanted to know how I felt waking up here alone?” he asked. 

His eyes were wide with surprise now, and Tamaris didn’t really understand why. “Yes,” she said slowly. “I mean, I wouldn’t ask if I didn’t want to know.”

He raised his eyebrows further, and Tamaris put down her cup, bemused by his reaction. “What?” she asked. “What’s wrong? Did I say something wrong?”

“No,” he said. “Not at all. I… you surprise me, that’s all.” His eyes moved carefully over her face as though he was studying her. “You are the only person in ages who repeatedly asks how I feel about things.”

Tamaris frowned. “Briala didn’t ask?”

“I discouraged her from asking,” he said. “I had to discourage her from asking a great many things.” He gave her a lopsided smile. “The agents of Fen’Harel are nothing if not practiced dissemblers.” 

“Oh. Right,” Tamaris said blankly. “What about… what about Solas himself, then? Didn’t he… he didn’t ask how you were doing with all that alone-time?” 

“He was preoccupied,” Felassan said wryly. “Several millennia’s worth of self-blame can be rather preoccupying.”

“He was your friend,” Tamaris said in a hard tone. “He should have asked.”

Felassan’s smile grew wider. “Are you saying you and I are friends?”

She gave him a sardonic look. “I’m not in the habit of sharing close quarters with people I hate, so yes, I’d call us friends.”

Felassan smiled at her for a moment longer, then shook his head and chuckled. “You know, the more time we spend together, the more endearing I find your bluntness to be.”

She rolled her eyes and idly flicked the handle of her mug. “Maybe I should start being all sweet and polite instead, then.”

“Please don’t,” he said. “I enjoy you as you are.” 

His tone was friendly and light, but his words lifted a sudden pulse low in her belly. I enjoy you...  Obviously he’d meant he enjoyed her company, but her stupid perverse mind was now presenting her with the idea of Felassan enjoying her in other, more carnal ways. 

He was still studying her as though she was something unique. She swallowed hard and abruptly stood up. “Let’s, um… those mana exercises. Let’s — we can practice in the library.” 

He nodded and rose to his feet, and Tamaris turned away and hurried through the study and up the short flight of stairs to the library.

The library featured two plush couches and two matching armchairs, a thick angora rug, and a couple of large silk cushions for lounging on — most of the cushions having been stolen by Felassan and moved to the space in front of the fireplace in the main room. Tamaris sat cross-legged on the angora rug, then looked up as Felassan sauntered into the room. 

He ran his fingers idly over the spines of a few books on one of the heavily-laden shelves. “Did I tell you I started reading Swords and Shields?”

She barked out a laugh. “You didn’t really.”

“I did,” he said with a smile. “I had to.”

“You had to?” she said drolly. “Why?”

“I couldn’t imagine my education about the last five years would be complete if I didn’t read it,” he said. “I’m a third of the way through already. Remind me to pass my compliments on to Varric.”

“No fucking way,” she said. “If you compliment him, he’ll write a third one.”

Felassan grinned wickedly. “Then I’ll be extra sure to compliment him.”

“Enabler,” she teased. “You’re a bad influence.”

He placed one hand on his chest and gave her a little half-bow. “Thank you, Tamaris. I try my very best.”

Tamaris scoffed and waved him over. “Come here and sit the fuck down.”

He sat down across from her and crossed his legs. “All right. Teach me the magical ways of Fen’Harel.”

As always, his tone was irreverent, and she shot him a chiding look, but she couldn’t help but appreciate the sight of him. His clothing, as always, was simple and comfortable: breeches and a plain linen shirt rolled casually to the elbows and lazily unlaced to the middle of his sternum, topped with a simple woven vest of light green. But his clothing was still somehow flattering, fitting his body as though it was made for him despite the fact that Tamaris could likely buy the exact same clothes at any clothing stall in Lowtown. He had loosely braided the sides of his long black hair before pulling it all back into a ponytail at his nape, and the effect of it all was a picture of dignified elegance, even though he was sitting humbly on the floor across from her.

“Is this part of the exercise?” he asked.

She blinked. “What?”

His lips curled suggestively at the corners. “I might go up in flames if you continue to inspect me in such a manner.” 

Fuck, she thought. She hadn’t meant to stare. She scowled at him. “Close your eyes, you brat.”

“Ah, insults,” she said cheerfully as he closed his eyes. “Always an excellent way of teaching.”

This time, she wisely ignored his words. She closed her own eyes as well. “All right. The idea is basically that people spend a lot of our time focused on the world outside of ourselves. But when you channel magic, you’re focusing inwards to draw on your mana and connect with the Fade. So… um, yeah. That’s the idea behind it.”

“Go on,” Felassan said quietly.

“Okay,” she said. “Well… the way Solas taught it to me was to start by just breathing. I mean, slow purposeful breathing. And then to sort of focus my attention on my own head, or in it. I mean, to pick a point on my head and to sink my focus there. And when I could feel the vibration of my own mana, that’s when I could try a spell.”

“Focus on your head?” Felassan asked.

She opened her eyes to find Felassan gazing curiously at her. “Yes,” she said. “He said that some mages focus on other body parts, like their hands or their heart or even their diaphragm, but most commonly the hands. But since I had the mark, he thought it would be less confusing to focus elsewhere than… than my hands...” She trailed off and scowled. Something had just occurred to her.

She sighed and dragged her fingers through her hair. “That asshole.”

Felassan’s eyebrows rose. “What’s the matter?”

She glared at him. “He purposely told me focus elsewhere because he knew I was going to lose my hand eventually, didn’t he? That fucking…” She clenched her jaw and looked away.

“Tamaris,” Felassan said.

His voice was soft. She took a deep breath to try and calm her anger before looking up. 

Felassan was gazing seriously at her. “You have two hands,” he said. “And you do not need them for this.”

She took another deep breath and nodded tightly. Felassan nodded as well and rested his hands humbly in his lap. “Will you show me how this process works?”

She inhaled again and nodded. “Sure. I’ll… I haven’t done this in a year or so, so bear with me.” She closed her eyes and breathed, and after a few minutes, when her anger had faded and she was focused on the ebb and flow of her own breath, she drew her attention to the center of her forehead. 

She imagined her mana there, like a faint glow of green: the same shade of green of a simple healing spell or a simple barrier. When she could feel the mana in her forehead, like tendrils reaching toward the Fade, she pressed her will into her right palm.

A small burst of energy lifted the fine hairs on her arms, and she sighed softly in relief. She was still able to make barriers, then. It seemed that the year she’d spent neglecting these exercises hadn’t totally eliminated her weak but hard-won magical abilities. 

She opened her eyes to find Felassan watching her with a distinctly wistful smile. “Nicely done,” he said. “That barrier was very cute.”

She recoiled slightly. “Cute?”

“Very,” he said. “Just like its maker.”

She scoffed. “Fuck you. My barriers are actually useful for being so small.”

“I imagine they’re extremely useful,” he said, and his tone was more serious now. “That barrier would deflect, what, one projectile or weapon strike?”

She eyed him shrewdly; he was exactly right. “Yes, if the strike isn’t too forceful.”

Felassan nodded. “Non-mages would not be able to feel that barrier. Even other mages might not detect it, depending on how strong they are. I imagine you used that often to throw enemies off? Fool them into thinking you’re making a reckless rush attack, and when their first blow glances off, you attack with your daggers?”

She raised her eyebrows, impressed despite herself. “Yes, exactly. How…?” She narrowed her eyes. “You figured all of that out just from seeing me make that one little barrier?”

“It’s a clever trick,” he said. “I am extremely fond of clever tricks. Especially when they involve cute barriers.”

She wrinkled her nose. “My barrier isn’t cute.”

He grinned. “It’s positively adorable. And its adorableness in no way detracts from its utility.”

She rolled her eyes. “Fuck’s sake, fine. My barrier is fucking precious. Now it’s your turn.”

Instead of closing his eyes to practice the exercise, however, he continued to gaze thoughtfully at her. “This process of focusing your mana. Does it not remind you of anything?”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“It doesn’t remind you of any other gift you exercised in the past?”

“Oh,” she said. “You mean talking to spirits? Well, yeah, but that’s different. That’s — I’ve always been able to do that.” She frowned thoughtfully. “With that though, I find I’m focusing just past this spot on my forehead instead of…” She trailed off and gave him a shrewd look. “Wait a second. Why are you asking?”

He raised his eyebrows, and Tamaris scowled at him. “Don’t play dumb with me. You know this method already, don’t you?”

He hesitated, then pulled a little face. “I do,” he said apologetically. “It’s the method that’s first used to teach young children to do magical feats on purpose instead of by accident.”

She stared at him, then slumped and rubbed her forehead. “Of course it is. I can do baby magic. Great.”

“I didn’t say this to infantilize you,” Felassan said. “Quite the opposite, actually. Fen’Harel must have been proud when you learned to do this. How long did it take you to learn this? Six months?”

“Something like that, yeah,” she muttered. 

“That’s impressive,” he said.

“Shut up,” she said sourly, but she couldn't bring herself to meet his eye; her face was hot with humiliation.

He shifted closer and tapped her knee. “I mean it, avise. I found it hard to draw from the Fade when I woke, and I have — well, I had considerably more power than you. This is… more than I would have expected.”

Tamaris grunted. “That’s what he said.”

“What did he say?” Felassan asked.

“He said… well, not my magic exactly, but he said I was not what he expected.” She scoffed and idly rubbed at the tiny dent on her metal arm. “I still don’t know what the fuck he did expect.”

“Ridicule,” Felassan said. “Rejection. It sounds like you showed him neither.”

She finally looked up at him with a scowl. “You’re always defending him.”

“Explaining is not the same as defending,” he said calmly. “And I suspect that I’m not saying anything you don’t really know. From everything you’ve said, you did know him better than you believe.”

She glared at him for a moment longer, then shrugged irritably and looked down at her palms. “Well, I wish you’d told me this was magic for children before I started showing it to you.”

“It is not just for children,” he said forcefully, and the vehemence of his tone made her lift her head. “That is my mistake, Tamaris. I misspoke before. It’s not magic for children. It’s a foundation that needs to be mastered in order to do more subtle and intricate things.” He gestured at her forehead. “Your ability to connect with spirits is the same. You were just lucky to be born with that ability in this time rather than needing to practice rituals to do it.”

She nodded silently and looked down at her hands again, humbled by the kindness in his tone. After a moment of silence, she looked up at him again. “Did you ever talk to spirits in this time after you woke up?”

He tilted his head. “Why do you ask?”

She shrugged. “I was just thinking that maybe you wouldn’t have been so lonely if you had. They kept me company sometimes when I was young. Before I learned that I should avoid talking to them in front of the others in my clan.”

His expression softened, and he nodded. “Yes, I spoke to spirits at times. But they were not as easily accessible for most of the time that I was awake.”

Tamaris understood. “Oh, you mean before the Breach. I get that. But what about while dreaming? Solas took a lot of Fade naps to spend time with spirits.”

Felassan raised his eyebrows, then tutted and shook his head. “So he wakes up in your world, and that is when he learns to relax? He really is an ass.”

Tamaris snorted a laugh. Felassan smiled at her, and the warm complicity in his face made her heart thump unnervingly.

“To answer your question, no,” he said. “I’m not especially partial to ‘Fade naps’, as you charmingly call them. Furthermore, I was tasked to learn about this world, so this is where I spent my time.” He shrugged and stretched his legs out on the carpet. “I did spend some time with spirits when I was asleep, though, and it did take the edge off of the loneliness at times.”

She nodded, and they were both quiet for a moment. Then Felassan tilted his head quizzically. “What’s on your mind?”

“Nothing, really,” she said. “It's just... nice having someone to talk about spirits with.”

Felassan nodded in acknowledgement. “He spoke to you at length about spirits, didn’t he?”

“Yes, he did,” she said. “Honestly, it was the main thing that brought us together. And when he was telling stories about the Fade, that’s when he was the most approachable. The most… loveable, really.” She huffed in a self-deprecating way and rolled her eyes. “That asshole seduced me with all his fucking stories about spirits.”

“Hm,” Felassan said thoughtfully. “Maybe I should talk about spirits with you more often, then.”

Her heart flipped at his provocative words. There was no way he could have meant that; it was way too bold a thing to say. 

She shot him a guarded glance. His ears were flushing a dark pink, but his clear violet eyes were steady and intense.

She huffed and dropped his gaze. Her heart was suddenly pounding. With a single focused look from Felassan, her pulse was rising, and she couldn’t decide if it was from excitement or from stupid, inexplicable fear.

“Rein it in, will you?” she said irritably. “It’s your turn to do these exercises now.” She gestured vaguely at him. 

“Tamaris,” he said quietly.

She pressed her lips together and didn’t reply. When Felassan spoke again, his tone was even softer. “Tamaris, look at me. Please.”

She forced herself to meet his gaze. His expression was still warm, but it was sympathetic now in a way that put her even more on edge. 

“What?” she said tensely.

He studied her for a moment before speaking. “I am being unconscionably bold, I know. I seem to have lost my ability to seduce you with any kind of charm. But I meant it when I said my interest in you is genuine.”

She tsked. “That’s… that makes no sense.”

“Why do you think that?” he asked.

“It’s… I’m…” I’m a fucked-up mess, she thought with a pang. But it was one thing to say this to Varric, and something altogether different to say it to Felassan, especially when he was looking at her this way. 

“Things are… complicated,” she said lamely.

“I know,” he said gently. “And I cannot say I know exactly what trials you’ve been through. But I know what it is to love the Dread Wolf. I know what it is to suffer terrible harm at his hands. Your past with him is complicated, and so was mine.” He gestured between himself and her. “This does not need to be complicated. I enjoy your company a great deal. This doesn’t need to be more complicated than enjoyable company of a more… physical kind.”

His tone and his smirk were suggestive, and she stared wordlessly at him with her heart in her throat. Uncomplicated, enjoyable company of a sexual nature… it was a tempting offer, and one that Tamaris would have easily agreed to in the past. It was what she’d had with Bull, after all, and it had worked out nicely for both of them without disrupting their working relationship or their friendship in any way. She was clearly capable of having a no-strings arrangement, so it made sense to have that arrangement with Felassan, especially since she was too scarred for anything more. 

So why did the thought of a no-strings liaison with Felassan make her feel like crying?

She looked away from him and didn’t speak. Once again, he was the one to break the awkward silence, and when he did, his tone was jocular once more. “Of course, it’s possible that I’m reading you completely incorrectly, and you are not interested. In which case, you should work on these magic exercises so you can learn to throw ice at me when I repeatedly come on to you.”

“Or when you put your fucking feet on the table while I’m trying to eat,” she muttered.

“An excellent idea,” he said heartily. “That too.”

She shot him a tiny smile, then sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. “Look, this sounds like a fucking cliché, but it’s not you. It’s…” She sighed again and gave him a frank look. “I’m obviously attracted to you, okay? I admit it.”

“I figured as much,” he said complacently. “That kiss last night was certainly not powered by disgust.”

A sudden memory of his tongue in her mouth flashed across her mind. She ignored the ripple of heat it triggered and tutted at him. “Shut the fuck up. What I’m trying to say is, it’s not — you’re not the problem. I’m… I need to think.”

He bowed his head graciously. “Fair enough. If you decide you want to take this further, then you have only to encourage the terrible lines I’ll continue to use on you.”

She laughed despite herself. “Your lines aren’t that bad. I’ve heard much worse.” In truth, Felassan’s accidentally-flirtatious lines were quite smooth. 

Very smooth, actually. She could only imagine how seductive he could be if he was actually doing it on purpose.

“I don’t doubt it,” he said. “I genuinely can’t understand how anyone in this time is able to seduce each other in the common tongue.”

Tamaris blinked in surprise. “What do you mean?”

“This language is very literal,” he said. “Everything means exactly what it sounds like. It’s exceedingly boring.”

She gave him a skeptical look. “Uh-huh. And flirting in ancient Elvhen is so much better?”

He smiled at her — a slow, knowing, predatory smile. “Yes, avise. Bedroom talk in our tongue is much better.” 

She swallowed hard. His voice was low and lilting and smooth, and it triggered a toe-curling bloom of heat between her legs, followed by an immediate panicked feeling of falling off the edge of a cliff.

Smug gorgeous brat, she thought desperately. She dropped his gaze and shifted away from him on the carpet. “Do your fucking mana-building exercises.”

He chuckled and crossed his legs. “Oh good, cursing. Another time-honoured teaching technique.” He closed his eyes and rested his hands palms-up on his knees, and Tamaris let out a quiet exhale of relief. It was so much easier to think when he wasn’t looking at her. 

This was the problem now, though. She’d told Felassan she would think about having sex with him, which meant she couldn’t keep deflecting him and storming off to her bedroom every time he unbalanced her. 

Which meant Tamaris needed to figure out why exactly he was unbalancing her so much. 

She studied him for a moment. His eyes were closed and his brows were drawn in a faint frown, and an unexpected little pang of fondness plucked at her heart.

She took a deep and slightly shaky breath, then closed her eyes. She’d think about it later. For now, she would focus on helping Felassan with his magic. 

[pikapeppa]

Dragon Age Question Meme

Tagged by @galadrieljones - thanks lethallan!  This is a long one - I’ll continue it under a cut. 

Tagging forward to @schoute @viktuuri-fluff-saved-my-life @thevikingwoman @buttsonthebeach @charlatron @mrscullensrutherford @oops-gingermoment @iarollane @aban-asaara @irlaimsaaralath @wardsarefunctioning and anyone else who wants to play!

01) Favourite game of the series?

I haven’t played Origins yet, but between DA2 and DA:I, Inquisition is my jam! I’ve played it 3 times already and I’m not yet tired of it! So many places to explore, and I still haven’t heard all the banter yet, and the lore is just so rich, so many codex entries, yes yes.

02) How did you discover Dragon Age?

Basically all my Horizon Zero Dawn friends insisted - INSISTED - that I play Inquisition. For some reason I thought I wouldn’t like it, like “ahh everyone says it’s so great, how great can it be.” WELP LOL. I have no regrets, but my HZD friends might, given how HORRIBLY OBSESSED I have become LOL. 

03) How many times you’ve played the games?

- Origins: 0 times, but looking to rectify that this year! - DA2: 1.5 times. Ughhh Act 2... - DA:I: 3.5 times and still loving it!

04) Favourite race to play as?

Elf. Hands down. I played a Trevelyan once and was like MEH BORING.

05) Favourite class?

MAGE. MAGE MAGE MAGE. Although I’ve been playing as Fenris a lot in DA2 and it’s surprisingly fun!! Good thing too since I’ll have to be a two-handed warrior during my Fenquisition playthrough

06) Do you play through the games differently or do you make the same decisions each time?

I’ll answer for Inquisition. There are some things I always do the same (e.g. Bull saving the Chargers, allying with Abelas, making Solas APPROVE OF ME LMAO), but other things I alternate. I’ve gone with the mages and the Templars twice, respectively; I prefer picking the mages, it just makes more sense and is more “ethical” to me, but I ADORE COLE and I think the whole envy demon storyline is very interesting, so I quite enjoy siding with the Templars too. I have done something different each time at the Winter Palace, and this time I plan to do something different yet again. I strongly prefer Cole as a spirit, but I’ve had him as a spirit and as human twice each. 

My Fenris-as-Inquisitor playthrough will be interesting. I’ll be playing in character as him, so it’s going to be quite different than what I canonically do, and I’m quite interested to see what happens. Solas is going to hate me oh god

07) Go-to adventuring group?

- DA2: FENRIS and Anders, and then I alternate my rogues. I love both Varric and Isabela, but depending on how far into my Fenris romance I am, I often have to leave Isabela behind because I HATE WATCHING HER FLIRT WITH MY MAN <sobbing> - Inquisition: SOLAS, Cole and Blackwall is my favourite group, but I also love bringing Cass instead of Blackwall - I love Cass and Cole’s banter. But Solas and Cole are my FAVOURITE PAIRING. I could listen to their incomprehensible chatter forever.

08) Which of your characters did you put the most thought into?

Damn. Umm... I put equal amounts of thought into Elia Lavellan (romanced with Solas), Athera Lavellan (romanced Abelas) and Rynne Hawke (romanced with Fenris). Before I started writing those ships, the question I had to answer was this: Why would Solas/Fenris/Abelas love her? I know why Elia loves Solas, and I know why Rynne loves Hawke and why Athera admires and eventually loves Abelas. But what is it about those OCs that those men fall in love with? I build my OCs around the men in their lives, not the other way around. 

09) Favourite romance?

URGH WHY MUST YOU ASK ME THIS. GOD FINE. Fenris rivalmance, ok?? But I also love the Solasmance and the Blackwall romance to the point of swooning so just FUCK RIGHT OFF WITH THIS QUESTION THXBAI~

10) have you read any of the comics/books?.

Yes! Masked Empire and Asunder.

11) if you read them, which was your favorite book?

Masked Empire. I really liked getting more background on Celene/Briala and Gaspard (i.e. WHY THE FUCK I SHOULD GIVE A SHIT ABOUT THE WINTER PALACE MISSION AT ALL). I loved Felassan and Briala’s dalen/hahren relationship. And it was just better written than Asunder.

12) Favorite DLCs?

Must agree with Gala here; Trespasser is bae, and Jaws of Hakkon is just beautiful (and also AMERIDAN <sob>). But I also liked Mark of the Assassin quite a bit! So amusing!

13) Things that annoy you.

The fact that it takes a MILLION YEARS to get banter in DA:I, and also that you can’t just click on your companions in DA:I whenever you like if you just want to hear their voice. I KNOW I’M NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO CLICKED ON FENRIS CONSTANTLY TO HEAR HIM SAY “I enjoy following you”, OKAY? LIKE ALL I WANT IS FOR SOLAS  TO SAY “vhenan” TO ME WHILE WE’RE WANDERING THROUGH THE BLOODY WESTERN APPROACH

14) Orlais or Ferelden?

Ferelden? We seem to spend more time there. But I’m kind of neutral I guess.

15) Templars or mages?

Mages. Hands down. Sorry Templars.

16) if you have multiple characters, are they in different/parallel universes or in the same one?

All parallel universes. None of them coexist. Rynne Hawke doesn’t even coexist with any of my Lavellans because Fenris becomes the Inquisitor in my headcanon

17) What did you name your pets? (mabari, summoned animals, mounts, etc)

I have only one pet, Hawke’s mabari, and his name is Toby. 

18) have you installed any mods?

Console only <sob>

19) Did your Warden want to become a Grey Warden?

n/a - haven’t played Origins yet!

20) Hawke’s personality?

PURPLE HAWKE, with a healthy dash of Isabela-level flirtiness. But Rynne (over?)uses humour to deflect pain and agitation and anger.

21) did you make matching armour for your companions in Inquisition?

...Maybe. 

HAHAH so I made matching colour armour for Elia and Solas, yes. And I generally like to dress both Cole and myself in black and red!

22) if your character(s) could go back in time to change one thing, what would they change?  

Ohhhh.... fuck. This is tough. - Elia Lavellan (romanced Solas): ...surprisingly, nothing really. She’s got a pretty zen kind of ‘what will be, will be’ attitude. In her darkest moments she might regret falling for Solas, but overall, she doesn’t really regret anything. - Arya Lavellan (romanced Blackwall): nothing. She is very confident.  - Athera Lavellan (romanced Abelas): honestly, she questions half of her decisions half the time. After Trespasser, she regrets not dissolving the Inquisition. (I haven’t decided yet if she eventually does dissolve it after all; perhaps we’ll see what DA4 brings us).  - Rynne Hawke (romanced Fenris): a LOT of things. She regrets letting Bethany attack that ogre. She regrets not bringing Carver to the Deep Roads, because maybe then he wouldn’t have joined the Templars to spite her. She regrets not following up more closely on Emeric’s murder investigation because otherwise maybe her mother wouldn’t have died. She basically blames herself anytime anything bad happens with her family (including the Merry Band of Misfits). 

23) Do you have any headcanons about your character(s) that go against canon?

I actually quite enjoy sticking to canon for the most part, and expanding on facts that we already know. The one canon-ish(?) thing I don’t love is the idea of Dalish Inquisitors understanding or speaking a dialect of Elvhen that’s mutually intelligible with the dialect that Solas and Abelas speak. I let it slide in my Solavellan fics, but I mean, it’s been THOUSANDS OF YEARS between Arlathan and the Dragon Age. Dalish Elvhen (even if they have many many dialects, which is most certainly the case) is very unlikely to be mutually intelligible with ancient Elvhen. I’ve been meaning to write a full post about this for like a year oops

24) Are any of your character(s) based on someone?

They all contain some elements of self-insert, so... me, I guess? XD

25) Who did you leave in the Fade?

The first time I played Inquisition, I had not played DA2 yet, so I left Hawke in the Fade for LOGIC REASONS OK - Stroud was like the only senior Warden left, I thought they needed him! I’ve left Stroud there every time thereafter. 

26) Favourite mount?

Well, it WOULD be any and all the harts, except for that FUCKING HORRENDOUS SOUND THEY MAKE. I thus prefer to ride dracolisks for the Coolness Factor™. 

[asomniari]

SHIPPING INFO // Answer the following for your muse(s) so people know how shipping works on your blog. REPOST. Don’t reblog.

What’s your OTP for your muse?: 

FelassanxBeing alive. I’m also very fond of any sort of ship (platonic, romantic) with a Lavellan. Particularly with a certain three Lavellan blogs -winks-

What are you willing to RP when it comes to shipping?:

I’m very fond of anything from fluff to actual smut. Though I get awkward part of the way through and stop sometimes unless my partner is willing to nudge me along. I’d really love to write more cute shippy things- even if it’s just platonic.

How large does the age gap have to be to make it uncomfortable?: 

I don’t think I’d want to write with someone younger than 15- especially over sensitive topics. In character, there likely wouldn’t be any sort of romantic interest if the character is younger than 25 (which still pushes it, a little). Already he feels like he’s walking around with a bunch of children, so the chemistry would have to be very good (and be, preferably, an elf) for anything romantic to happen.

Are you selective when shipping?:

I really like ships! Anyone else and I’d ask for ships left and right. But because it’s Felassan, and there just isn’t a whole lot of information (and interest from him in general). For him, he seems to automatically fall into the same mentor role Solas filled for the inquisitor. But it mostly depends on the character, the chemistry, and how long I’ve thought about shipping (With Ysenia, I took like 3 weeks sitting on it before asking to ship lol)

How far do steamy moments have to go before they’re considered NSFW?: 

When the clothes are all off and they’re touching things B)

Who are other muses you ship your muse with?:

I’ve had ships with @bellafaire-bellafine the longest, even though we’re in a   slight standstill (mostly ‘cause my stress is killing the mood). I have another romantic ship with @somnivr including whatever is going on with @tanadhal and @youriinquisitorialness (He’s very fond of Theria, tbh) and with @arsuledin‘s Solas and Felassan (bro)mance, ofc

Does one have to ask to ship with you?:

Yeah. I would strongly prefer if someone asks before deciding on a ship. It’s one thing if it develops over time through threads, but it’s something else entirely if someone just assumes I also ship it and guns for romance.I don’t like having to reject people, but it really just depends on how close the characters and myself are to the partner.

How often do you like to ship?:

Depends, honestly. it all depends on chemistry. I still haven’t entirely figured out my character’s own sexuality and what his preferences are. So I do worry about jumping into a ship and ending up not liking and hurting my partner’s feelings.

Are you multiship?: 

Yeah XD But I do try and contain myself on the romantic ships because I have been guilty of throwing someone to the wayside because I like another ship more.

Are you ship obsessed or ship more-or-less?: 

Yes

What is your favorite ship in your current fandom?: 

The ship that @tanadhal and the super cool Loki blog have is 100%

Finally, how does one ship with you?: 

Write and plot with me. Because it all depends on how well the characters and myself connect with my partner and theirs. It greatly helps if you take the time to get to know me beyond threads and talk to me. Also you can suck up to me by throwing headcanons and that stuff in my direction

TAGGED BY:  @arsuledin​ TAGGING: @smaugiiisms​ @somnivr​ @tanadhal​ @youriinquisitorialness​