#//I would like to thank my wife for this amazing; beautiful promo she made

[chxxseyourfighter]

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[theworldofotps]

Silent Stranger (Part 1)

Pairing: Dexter Lumis x Reader Word Count: 2,377 Description: New to NXT, Y/n makes some new friends who warn her to stay away from one of their coworkers. Misunderstood and silent Dexter can’t help but admire the new woman at work.

Part 2

Part 3

Dedicated to the sweet anon who said they would like to read some Dexter fics in the future. And I had been planning to but never had an idea, my sweet friend Rachael gave me this idea which I love. Anon I really hope you like this, and thank you so much @new-zealand-chic for all your help. Xx

Warning: Povs switch between first and third person throughout the fic. They are separated by ~~~ so hopefully you don’t get confused. ____________ Tag list:

@hungmanhorsecarriage @writtingrose @sjwrites22 @sassymox @the-beastslayers-queen @thewrestlingwarehouse @new-zealand-chic @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @xladyxfatex @biforrollynch @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @demonqueen29 @itsicantbelievethis666  @lilred91 @xbreezymeadowsx @rebellious-desires @youcantreignonmyparade @melblacc @undiscovereddisneyroyalty

If you wanna be added to the list lemme know. _____________

“Glad you could finally join us Y/n we’ve heard some amazing things from the PC about you, I truly hope you enjoy working here with us at NXT.”

“Thank you so much Hunter I really appreciate it, I’m sure I’ll love it.”

I smile shaking his hand, standing I pull my bag over my shoulder following behind him as he leads the way from his office.

“I’ve already gone ahead and asked Shotzi to show you around just until you learn the ropes and know where everything this. She was thrilled to be the welcome committee, any questions you have just go ahead and ask her.”

“Thank you that takes away some of the nervousness I had.”

Following Hunter, down a few halls, we come to the back area where a few superstars were sat at tables doing their own thing or eating.

“Hey Shotzi come here for a moment please.”

I watch as an energetic woman comes over quickly her green hair standing out brightly, at least I wouldn’t lose or mistake her for someone else.

“What’s up boss?”

“This is Y/n, she’s the new superstar I was talking to you about the other day.”

“Of course the one I’m showing the ropes to, it’s so nice to meet you I hope that you enjoy working with us here.”

“Thank you, it’s nice to met you too I really appreciate you helping me.”

“You’re welcome, it’s no trouble at all I know how hard it can be when you first get here and who better to befriend on your first day than me?”

Shotzi laughs and lets out a little howl then hooks her arm with mine quickly leading me away from Hunter who chuckles waving. Walking around Shotzi points out a bunch of different areas and even introduces me to a few of the other wrestlers sitting or walking around. 

“What do you think so far?”

“It’s great better than I ever dreamed it could be I’m honestly so excited that this is going to be my life.”

Smiling as we sit at a table with some bottles of water and a bag of chips to share I look around watching everyone.

“Is this everyone?”

“No way, there are some in other parts of the building working out and some didn’t come in today. But you’ll see most of them on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays.”

“Okay got it.”

I say eating a few of my chips as nervous as I was to be finally here I was more excited and hoped to befriend some of my coworkers.

“Once you’ve finished eating we can head over to one of the practice gyms and do some work to practice for whatever match you end up having first for your debut.”

“Sounds good to me I’m more than ready to get started.”

Shotzi smiles at me patting my back as we make small talk finishing our snack then heading off to find a ring to work out in. ~~~~~~~ Dexter walks quietly down the hallway he had just finished a match and gotten a shower. Since he wasn't needed for anything else tonight he was going home. Adjusting his duffel bag on his shoulder, he gets halfway through the center before feeling a smaller body crash into his from behind. Thinking it was someone doing an unexpected promo he quickly turns around stopping when he sees the new woman that joined NXT a few weeks ago. 

“I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to run into you. I'm trying to hide from my friend and wasn’t watching where I was going.”

She says and gives him an apologetic smile, Dexter offers his hand helping the woman up off the floor looking her over to be sure she wasn’t hurt then gives an incline of his head. She was trying to keep her balance as she adjusted her shoe. Hearing someone call her name he turns and leaves continuing on his way to the parking lot. Not noticing the woman left standing behind, staring after him. Getting into his car he starts it pulling out of the lot and driving back home.

That was the first time he had seen her face to face, the last few weeks she was at Full Sail he had taken a genuine interest in her. He had learned a little about her having overheard conversations with their coworkers while he was eating lunch. He honestly was kind of hoping to run into her sooner or later and found himself wanting to befriend the woman. He just wasn't sure how to go about it, maybe it was just best for him to be silent and wait. It was what he did best and he really didn't want to let people know he was curious about her.  

The drive from Full Sail to his house was filled with a little music playing on the radio. Other than that his mind was just wondering, he couldn't help but smile when he moved and the faint scent of your perfume hit his nose. You hadn't even touched him for that long. Parking in the garage once home he goes inside. Dexter was more than ready to sleep; he just needed to brush his teeth and change into pajamas. Stepping into his bedroom Dexter begins stripping crawling into bed once he is changed and settled. He was excited to go back to work to see you. 

~~~~~~~~~ Looking up from my book I smile seeing Finn walk into my room carrying a small vase full of flowers. 

"Y/n delivery." 

"Hey Finn, wow those are beautiful where did they come from?"

"I don't know I was coming to see if you wanted to grab lunch with Shotzi and I. They were sitting on the floor outside your door and there is a card that says. 'Hope you enjoy these flowers, they pale in comparison to you.'"

“Awe that’s so sweet.”

Standing I took the flowers, smelling them then reading the card, it was typed out so I wasn’t able to find out from handwriting who sent them. 

“I wonder why they didn’t sign their name.”

“Well if you ask me I think you have an admirer.”

“Oh come on Finn I haven’t even been here that long how could someone admire me?”

Setting the flowers on my small table I read over the card once more as he sighs dramatically and sits down next to me.”

“Because you’re an awesome person who just seems to draw people in even when you don’t mean to. I know you don’t feel like you’re good at making friends but people just can’t help but want to be around you.”

“If you hadn’t trained me at the PC would you have felt that way when I came here?”

“Probably then again I don’t know, being the champ makes me busy so it’s a probability but I’m sure we would have become friends quickly anyway.”

“Awe that’s sweet of you.”

Pinching his cheek lightly I laugh as he swats my hand away standing back up and stretching. 

“You wanna go get some lunch?”

“Yes I’m hungry.”

Standing I grab my phone pocketing it and following Finn from the room shutting the door behind me, placing my arm through his grinning.

”Lead the way Prinxey.”

~~~~~~~~

Dexter watches from the shadows as Finn picked the flowers up that he had left for y/n, he really hoped that you liked them. Waiting until you left he walked over with a small gift box full of a few things for a self care day. Opening the door a crack he slides the gift in, he didn’t want to invade your privacy by going all the way in. And he was thankful you hadn’t remembered to lock the door before you left. Closing your door gently Dexter quickly leaves just to keep anyone from spotting him. Going back to his room he sits down to start on a drawing he was doing for you.

For the next month Dexter left you small gifts, drawings and notes just something to make you smile. Nobody could tell you who it was doing this all and he couldn’t believe his luck that you hadn’t found out it was him yet. You two still had no communication apart from the night you ran into him. He was good at staying hidden and to be honest he was nervous about how you’d react. It wasn’t any secret that a lot of people thought he was weird and even a bit scary. But the few people he had managed to befriend they all stayed out of each other's intimate relationships. And he wasn't sure if he wanted to go changing that now. ~~~~~~

"I can't for the life of me figure out who's been sending these gifts."

"Have you gotten any new ones lately?" 

Looking across the table at Johnny whose wife I was currently feuding with, I nod my head. Reaching into my bag I pull out the most recent picture. Handing it to him I watch as he looks it over then shows it to the guy beside him. 

"I can almost guarantee you that it's Lumis, he's the only person around here I've seen that draws like this."

Johnny says and hands the picture back with a chuckle.

"Which one is he?" 

I ask as if I didn't already know, I had been paying attention to Lumis since that night I ran into him. There was just something about his presence that made me want to know more about him. 

"He's that really tall guy kind of blonde colored hair, mustache and muscles he wears those leather gloves when he wrestles." 

Johnny says and then points towards the door over my shoulder. 

"That one right there, aye Dexter! Are you the one sending these weird pictures to Y/n?"

"Like you'd actually stand a chance?"

The guy sitting with Johnny laughs loudly, frowning I watch as Dexter stops in his tracks staring at our table. He quickly turned away leaving the catering area.

"Why would you do that?"

"Oh come on y/n don't worry or waste your time on Lumis he's a freak that's why he stays to himself."

Johnny listens to his friend before turning his attention back towards me.

"You'd do your best to stay away from him y/n honestly."

"I think that should be my choice to make and right now I'm going after him. I suggest you two find something else to do then be awful to someone who just doesn't wanna talk to people."

Grabbing my things I quickly leave the catering area looking down the hallways. I had no idea where Dexter had gone or even what room he stayed in. Pulling my phone out I text Finn.

Y/n🎶⭐: Do you know where Dexter's room is?

Hitting send I begin walking around if Finn couldn't help me I may have to find a staff member who could.

Finn😈👑: It's one hall down from mine left turn

Finn😈👑: Why?

Y/n🎶⭐: Cause Johnny thinks he's the one that's been sending me the pictures and gifts and they called him out on it and I think they made him feel bad

Y/n🎶⭐: So I wanna talk to him

Finn😈👑: Dexter doesn't really talk to anyone here except for the few people that he's friends with

Y/n🎶⭐: It's worth a shot

Finn😈👑: Just be careful and if you need anything let me know

Y/n🎶⭐: I know thanks Finn

Pocketing my phone I make my way down the hallways heading for Finn's room. Once past it I go down turning left. I look at the doors, not all the superstars had their own changing rooms but Dexter's was one of the only few back here. Taking a deep breath I knock on the door then step back to wait and see if he opened the door.

"Hi Dexter."

I wave after he opens the door.

"Can I come in please?"

Dexter steps out of the way after a moment of hesitation, stepping inside I walk a little farther in his room and look around. He motions to the couch, smiling at him I sit down fiddling with my fingers in my lap.

"We haven't formally met apart from me running into you, I'm Y/n. I wanted to come and apologize for how Johnny and whatever his friend's name treated you. I didn't think showing him the picture would cause that, I was just hoping he could help me figure who sent it."

Pulling out the picture I place it on the small coffee table between us.

"Did you do this? Are you the one who's been giving me the flowers, little gifts and drawings."

Watching Dexter rub a hand against his neck then nods his head, smiling at his gaze darting around the room I place it back in my bag.

"I want to thank you for everything. It was really sweet of you. You don't have to be embarrassed about it either if you were, I'm actually quite flattered."

I explained looking around the room, he hadn't said anything yet and I wasn't sure what else to really say.

"I know you don't really say much but maybe would you like to exchange numbers? I think we could be really good friends, and it would be easier for you."

Dexter nods and grabs his phone, swapping we put our names in and I hand it back.

"Well I guess that I better go, I have a practice match coming up and I don't wanna miss out. Thank you again."

Standing I walk to the door Dexter holding it open for me, stepping out I turn giving his hand a light squeeze then quickly making my way back towards my room. I felt really good about how it went and I hoped we could be friends. Stopping at my door when my phone goes off I pull it out smiling.

D. Lumis👁️👁️: Would you like to go get coffee or something sometime? Maybe Wednesday morning?

Y/n💮: I would love to😊

[burnedbyshoto]

Hello! Since your askbox is open, is it alright that ask for a request? If so, can you please write a scenario detailing the birth of Todoroki and his s/o’s first child? Maybe he is out on patrol when he hears that his s/o is about to give birth and has his friends rush him there? I’ve been having a bad week, so please inject me with fluff and good feels. Thank you!

anon, love, I hope this helps you feel better! I’m sorry I wasn’t able to upload this the day you submitted. I know I don’t know you, or you know me, but if you want to talk about this bad week please feel free to dm me!!! sending my love

todoroki shouto x first time pregnant!reader

warning: pure fluff!!!

Part Two  Part Three  Part Four

Pregnancy can be a beautiful thing, and in this case, it typically was.

The day you had found out you were pregnant you could not stop crying, immediately calling Shouto, your loving husband of two years, to bear the good news. While giving you an initial scare by immediately hanging up on you when spilling the news, you were relieved to find him next to you in five minutes with a bouquet of your favorite flowers and misty eyes.

You could still remember holding him tightly as you two hugged as tears fell down your face as you whispered to Shouto that it was real and that he was going to make an amazing parent.

That was exactly thirty-nine weeks ago, and now being an entire week overdue with the same raging pregancy hormones, you wanted this baby out of you!

You were a Pro-Hero before this baby, and you planned on staying a Pro-Hero once the sucker was born. Through a lot of pressure from family, friends, and mostly Shouto, you had agreed to spend the your pregnancy with your alumni U.A. and teach Hero Basics even though you would not be participating in any actual lessons as soon as you couldn’t see your toes anymore.

So there you sat at home, your swollen feet elevated on pillows as a heated blanket lay over your simultaneous cold and hot body, dumb hormones were making you crazy. You were overdue, and you were ready to quite literally kick this baby out of you. Were you excited to be a mother, definitely, but this child seemed to be tap dancing on your bladder like it was life or death.

“Relax, tenshi,” You whispered to your baby, rubbing your swollen belly as you grimaced as a terrible heat flash went throughout your body, “Are you seriously craving donuts right now? We just had an early dinner!” You gasped as images of the sugary sweet dessert flashed through your mind making your mouth water.

“Okay, you convinced me!” You laugh, it took you a while, but soon you managed to squirm off the couch and onto your feet only after two minutes. “That’s a new record, I should tell Shouto…”

How you used to be an S-Rank Pro-Hero you had no idea because now you couldn’t even put on shoes without assistance. “Mama is gonna cry when she has to get back into shape. You made me so fat!” You coo softly to yourself as you waddled over to your purse and grabbed it.

Checking yourself in the mirror, you groaned. Your face was so round that it officially beat Uraraka’s for roundest face in the old class 1-A. You wore a maxi sundress even though it was still February because nothing else fits! Well, sweaty old XXL shirts did but it just was not acceptable in public! Slipping on your sandals, you yelled goodbye to no one in the house and waddled out to buy some donuts.

You eventually made it to the donut shop with drool just about coming down your mouth as you entered the store.

“Ah, Todoroki-sama, I was wondering if you were going to be coming in at all today!” The owner greeted you with a bow as you laughed easily.

“My little Tenshi got his little donut cravings really late tonight, Takashima-sama you wound me, your best customer would never disappoint!” You teased back, your face contorted into a grimace as you clutched your swollen belly, waddling closer to the counter with your wallet ready.

“This one is on the house,” The store owner Takashima said, sliding over a box of half a dozen maple bars.

You teared up, accepting the box while sobbing, and left a generous tip as you went to sit down. Calming down slowly, you groaned as you placed the box down and froze.

Why was your leg wet?

You looked down, hands waving with heightened anxiety and shrieked, “ TAKASHIMA-SAMA, MY WATER BROKE!”

⋆✭⋆✭⋆⋆✭⋆✭⋆

Twenty minutes away via car stood Todoroki Shouto walking down the crowded streets of Tokyo with Midoriya and Iida. The three of them had finished working together for a promo radio interview and were now patrolling near their agencies.

“You know, I’ve really come to miss y/l/n-chan walking around with us,” Iida confessed as he waved to a young fan who was pointing him out to his mother.

“It’s Todoroki, Iida-kun,” Midoriya reminds Iida for the millionth time, but knows that no amount of reminding will ever get Iida to not call you by your maiden name.

“Y/n will be back soon after of course, she feels ready to return to the field,” Shouto says silently agreeing with the fact that he missed having his wife with him while working, it had to be the worst thing about you getting pregnant by far. 

“Is she not overdue for the baby, as well? Don’t most pregnancies last only thirty-eight weeks?” Iida questioned as they stopped to take pictures with an obvious American fan.

“Y/n’s ob-gyn doctor said we shouldn’t worry, but that if by the end of the week if y/n hasn’t given birth naturally, she’ll need a c-section,” Shouto explained as he pulled out his phone feeling it buzzing. He saw your contact picture, a celebratory picture of you after finishing a rather intense hiking trail during your honeymoon. “It’s y/n.”

The two of them nod their head as they watched Shouto pick the phone to his ear as he turned around to give himself some privacy. Shouto spoke once, nodded three times and hung up after giving his love.

“Well, y/n is in labor, and I need to get going,” Shouto says eerily calm, his arms stiff by his side, and Midoriya just about jumps out of his skin.

“SHE’S IN LABOR?! OH MY GOD, I’M NOT READY!!”

“Do not panic, Midoriya-kun, it is Todoroki who is going to be the father, not you.” Iida reminds Midoriya who is looking in every direction trying to figure out a game plan for getting to the hospital.

“I KNOW THAT! BUT I–” Midoriya stops and looks over at Shouto who is visibly panicking. “Todoroki-kun, are you okay?”

“There are no more trains back to Musutafu until 21:00,” Todoroki says carefully and to their horror, it’s only 18:30. “Even if we take a car, we could be late.”

“No!” Iida and Midoriya yell.

“I’ll get you there on time!” Midoriya affirms turning his back to Shouto. “Get on!”

With a crackle of lighting, and the shout of “RECIPRO BURST” the three Pro-Heroes were gone without a trace.

⋆✭⋆✭⋆⋆✭⋆✭⋆

“It hurts!” You scream in pain as contraction after contraction plummets through you, obviously, your baby had no care in the world that 1. mama was in a hell lot of pain and 2. papa wasn’t here yet so you weren’t going to let him leave your womb.

“Todoroki-sama, you need to push! You’re going to get yourself or the baby hurt!” Your doctor yells obviously worried as you clenched your legs tightly together.

“I’m not having this baby without S-Shoucchan here!” You cry as the pain is quickly becoming unbearable.

“Y/n, I’m here!” A very frazzled looking Shouto walks through the delivery room, his body clothed in medical scrubs his face showing his fear and love. You giggle a bit like a lunatic seeing a few leaves stuck in his hair finding it amusing despite the pain.

“Midoriya and Iida brought y-yOU!?” You screamed again as your body is now fighting you on letting your baby come out.

You look up and see Shouto now at your bedside, his hand clutching yours as the doctor commands a few nurses to get things ready. “I was scared I was going to miss this…” Shouto admits as you clench his hand in yours as another painful contraction sears your body.

“You’re not missing anything!” You can’t help but snap as you throw your head back, a thin sheen of sweat covering your body. “Get this baby oUT OF ME!” You shriek at the doctor who has now positioned your legs for delivery.

“Alright, Todoroki-sama, I need you to push for ten seconds, okay?”

“OKAY!!”

And Shouto watched as his wife only tightened her death grip on his hands, curses leaving her lips left and right as she pushed with all her might. He stared over at the doctor who he knew was screaming at his stubborn wife to follow his commands, but he could hear nothing besides the roar of his heartbeat in his ears.

Shouto can’t stop himself from leaning over and pressing a kiss on your sweating forehead as you scream louder to get the baby out of you. Then, Shouto can hear a soft cry. His eyes widen as he watches the pink, white, and bloody baby being held by the doctor and all he can hear is the baby’s cries and the exhausted pants from you.

He looks down to find you slumping in the bed, your hair a complete mess, sweat drenching your body, and tears falling down your face.

“Shoucchan,” You murmur, and immediately Shouto is attending to you, wiping off the sweat, fluffing your pillow and kissing you a million times as both your shaking hands hold each other. “Baby, you’re crying.” You inform him with a weak but incredibly affectionate smile.

Shouto wipes away the tears that fall down his face, only to find himself crying, even more. The nurse eventually brings your guys’ small baby boy over to the two of you and gently handed him to you, and you cradle your baby close to your body. “Hi Kaito,” You coo at the baby who was now soundlessly sleeping on your chest, “I’m your mama, and I just want you to know that even though you were a pain in my ass, I love you so much…” 

Shouto snorts as you look up at him and smile, and he comes down to press another kiss on your lips. “Come here, Shoucchan,” You say handing your son over to him, and watched as your husband froze. You waited a moment and then grinned as Shouto reached for baby Kaito and you easily handed him over. You watched with tears in your eyes as Shouto gently bounced with Kaito in his arms, whispering about how much he was going to love him, and how he was going to make Kaito proud to be his son.

“I promise, Kaito, I will never ever let you or your beautiful mama get hurt, and I promise you no matter what happens, I will love you forever and always.”

this made me really soft and kinda was like “maybe pregnancy isn’t that bad???” anywho, hope you enjoyed and have a good rest of your day!!!!!

bonus!

The entire old Class 1-A shuffled through the hallways of the hospital, each claiming to see a different patient so that they could all visit your room.

“Okay, just in case you bozo’s don’t know how to behave around babies, do not scream when we walk in. They are shits to be put to bed, and if you wake up y/n-chan’s sleeping baby, I will end you!” Mina threatens as she eyes down the… louder members of the class. “Second of all, it’s a baby, so don’t talk to it expecting answers, and most importantly, do not. I repeat, do NOT, throw the baby around like it’s some game!”

She gave an obviously pointed glare at Kaminari.

“I’m so excited!” Momo squeals right before they open the door, and with numerous amounts of presents and balloons on hand, nineteen Pro-Heroes entered the room and froze. The sight in front of them making them speechless. Shouto was laying on the bed with you, his arm behind you giving you comfort, and the baby laying on your chest asleep. For the matter at hand, all three of you were asleep without a care in the world.

Some members of the party had to bite down on their hands to keep them from screaming.

Later that night when Shouto woke up for a few minutes and checked his phone for any messages, he then saw a picture of the three of them asleep on the hospital bed on the group chat, with a caption:

‘What a beautiful family, can’t wait for more pictures! Welcome to the family Todoroki Kaito! We love you!’

[myhockeyworld87]

Nervous Regrets - Tyler Seguin - Part 29

Word Count: 4,198

POV: Reader

Warnings: Smut, NSFW, Language, Pregnancy Pictures??

Notes: It’s not yet tomorrow, so at least I kept my word and got this one out today as well. We are definitely getting closer to the birth. Can’t wait! Happy Reading!

Nervous Regrets Masterlist

The beach was completely amazing. The water was warm; the sun was shining and everyone was laughing and having so much fun. Tyler wouldn't let you go in the water without him being by your side, for fear that you'd get knocked down by a wave. Which at first you were totally going to protest, but as the first wave hit, you felt yourself lose a bit of your balance. From then on out, you made sure you only went in just slightly above your ankles if he wasn't around.

On day two, Anna finally convinced you to start your pregnancy shoot, while the boys were out golfing in the afternoon. You'd brought several outfits, along with lingerie, to change into for all the photos Anna had in mind. She started off with some cute dress shots of you on the beach, mostly you walking along in the shallow water, some with the waves splashing around. You changed into one of your bikinis, with cute flowy cover-ups, for a couple of the shots. Moving up the pool, Anna did a few unique shots there as well. She then had you put on a few of the lingerie sets and did some sexy shots just for Tyler in the bedroom.

 The lighting was hitting the house perfectly, and they all somehow convinced you to go nude, which was totally out of your comfort zone. The backdrop and lighting created the perfect opportunity for some silhouette shots. "Ok, just lay there and cover your breasts with your left hand. Oh, that's perfect." Anna told you. "Now bend your left knee up and point your toes." You had your hair fanned out behind you, and you weren't sure what made you do it, but you arched your back slightly. "Oh my god, yes, that looks amazing."

 "Seriously (Y/N), you look so beautiful. Tyler is going to freak." This was from Liv, as she and Jenna were standing over by Anna, as she snapped shot after shot.

 After a few more pictures like that, Anna gave you a gauzy piece of material to wrap around you. You kneeled, keeping your feet under you while you brought the material up to cover your breasts, as much as it would allow. "These are so good (Y/N), I can't wait for you to see them." It felt like you did about a hundred more poses in the next thirty minutes, but soon you were all gathered around Anna's laptop looking at all the photos she took.

 "Anna, these are fantastic. How did you make me look so good?" You always knew Anna was an amazing photographer, but each of the pictures she took of you was simply beautiful. She'd even captured some fun playful ones, from when the girls had made you laugh.

 "I'm so glad you like them. I can't wait to do some with both you and Tyler."

 You were scrolling through all the photos when the guys finally got home. "What are you ladies up to? Because from here it looks like no good." Jamie teased you all as he came over to give Jenna a kiss on the cheek. "Oh wow! (Y/N) these are….wow! They're amazing."

 "Awww, thanks, Jame!"

 "Ok Chubbs, why are you complimenting my wife?" Tyler asked and you turned so quick, you could've got whiplash as he called you wife.

 Thankfully, no one but you and Jenna really noticed and she quickly covered it by saying. "We're all looking at the phenomenal photos Anna took of (Y/N) this afternoon."

 "Oh, I want to see." Tyler pushed his way over by you so that he could get a good view on the computer. "Oh my god babe, you look stunning." Anna continued to scroll down thru until she was at the nude ones. Tyler's jaw dropped. "Fuck babe, these are hot."

 "Anna did a great job, didn't she?"

 "Yeah, she did."

 "Thanks, guys, but (Y/N) made it easy. I need to edit them, but I'll do that when we get back home. However, we still have more to take of the two of you." You weren't going to deny that you were looking forward to doing a photo shoot with Tyler and seeing what Anna would do with the two of you together.

 "Let me grab a shower, and we can get started if you want?" Tyler seemed eager, now that he'd seen your proofs, to get some pictures of the two of you. With a quick kiss, he headed off to your room. You and Anna exchanged a knowing glance, then burst into giggles.

 "Are you good to keep doing this or want to finish them up another day?"

 "Are you kidding? I could do this all day. I wish I could make a living doing this. Speaking of which, you don't care if I use some of these to promo my photography business do you?"

 "Oh my god, Anna I'd be mad if you didn't. I'll do anything I can to help you." She was a really great photographer and loved it, so if these pictures could help, you were all in. "So what are you thinking for Tyler and me?"

 "Well, I thought we could start off here and then move out to the beach and hopefully catch the sunset." It sounded perfect and you nodded, then headed into the bedroom to change and check to see if Ty was ready.

 The shower was off, and you could hear the sound of music floating from the bathroom, with Tyler humming along to it as he got ready. It brought a smile to your face. He was splashing a bit of cologne on himself, the one that made you go weak in the knees when you smelled it on him. He saw your reflection in the mirror as you were leaning against the doorframe, just watching him; and he smiled at you. "Hey baby, come here." It was as if your legs had a mind of their own as they made your way over to your husband; where he wrapped you up in his arms. "God I love you." His lips found yours in a searing kiss, that stole your breath away. "Those pictures babe…. you're so gorgeous. I don't think that I've ever seen you look more beautiful. Well, maybe the day I married you."

 "Speaking of which, did you realize you called me your wife out there?"

 He shrugged his right shoulder. "Oh well, I mean you are my wife."

 "I thought we weren't telling anyone? Especially since our family's don't know." You were pretty sure your parents would understand why you and Tyler decided to get married before the baby, but you wanted them to find out from you and not through friends.

 "I know. I know." He pulled you a little tighter to him. "I love you so much and I just forget sometimes that I can't call you my wife all the time." He kissed your forehead. "Now stop distracting me so I can finish getting ready."

 Rolling your eyes at him, you stepped out of his embrace. "Far be it from me to get in the way of your beauty rituals."

 You made your way back into the bedroom, to find the white lingerie set you had on earlier. "Hey babe, what am I supposed to wear?"

 "I brought you khakis and a white shirt for the beach. Anna said something about jeans and a t-shirt for a few, so throw that on now." By the time you put the bra and panties back on, Tyler had a pair of jeans on and was coming out of the bathroom.

 "Woah!" Just then a knock sounded at the door, which was probably for the best because the look in Tyler's eyes told you, you wouldn't be getting photos taken if he had his way.

 "You guys ready?" Anna asked as she swept into your room, camera and accessories in tow. "Ok don't move, the lighting is perfect there." You'd been standing by Tyler, near the sliding glass doors that led outside to the beach. "Well I mean you can pose and stuff, but this will be great."

 Tyler held you in his arms and the both of you looked down at the baby growing inside you, as Anna snapped some shots. "Oh wait, should I put a shirt on?"

 "Nah, I like the idea that your tattoos are showing." You told him.

 "Ok, how about you turn around (Y/N) and both of you can cradle the baby. Yep just like that." She took a bunch more throughout the bedroom before having you lay down on the bed, while Tyler came over the top of you to kiss your bump. In another pose, he was laying on his side behind you, both of you had your hands on the baby while you looked deeply into each other eyes. Tyler would steal kisses every now and then throughout the entire shoot, and you knew Anna captured the whole thing.

 By the time you headed outside the sun was perfect. After having a difficult time finding a wedding dress on short notice, you'd ordered a white flowy dress for the pictures off the internet. Anna took tons of photos on the beach, but one of your favorites was holding hands with Tyler, just walking through the water, as the sunset behind you. All the pictures turned out amazing, and you knew that you were going to owe Anna big time.

 It was a beautiful night, and by the time you were done with the photo shoot, the chef had dinner all prepared. Everything looked delectable and you hadn't realized how hungry you actually were until there was food in front of you. The meal was delicious and the conversation with all your friends even better. Being in Cabo, just made everyone seem so relaxed and at ease; including your husband. He was laughing and joking with everyone; not that he wasn't normally like this, he was just a bit more carefree at the moment.

 As the night went on, all the couples seemed to break off; you and Tyler included. The two of you were just strolling along the beach in the moonlight, enjoying each other's company. "You know babe, we haven't really talked about what we're going to the name the baby."

 Tyler was right. While you were prepared for the little one's arrival in almost every other way, you hadn't even begun to talk about names. "So what are you thinking?"

 You were headed back to the villa, now just sort of taking your time on the way back. "Hmmm. I like the name Chloe for a girl."

 "Eh, I don't really feel that. What about Madison?"

 He scrunched up his nose in distaste. "Nope, I dated a Madison once and she was crazy."

 "Oh, well if we go by all the women you've dated, we'll never have a girl's name."

 His hand that was entwined with yours, tugged you closer to him. "Shut up, I haven't really dated that many women." His lips kissed yours before you could make another smart remark. "Ok, what about boy names then?"

 "How about Braydon?" You'd come across the name in one of your baby books and liked the fact of nicknaming them Bray.

 "It's not bad. I was honestly thinking of something to go with my Greek background, like Adonis."

 You couldn't help it, you burst out laughing. "We are not naming our child Adonis."

 "What, Adonis Seguin has a nice ring to it." Even Tyler was laughing when he said the name out loud.

 "I like the idea of the Greek origin though. I've always loved Liam, is that Greek?" You hadn't really thought about having either of your ethnicity in the name, but obviously, Tyler had.

 "I think that's Irish babe."

 "Well, I'm going to have to look up some Greek names that's for sure. What about Layla?"

 "Oh no, I mean first off, there's the song and no one is going to be getting down on their knees for my baby girl. Plus I can just hear some guy when she's like eighteen asking if she was a good lay."

 "Oh my god, Ty stop! Your imagination is running wild hun." He was really going too far with that one. "I feel like you're speaking from experience on that one." The two of you had finally made it back to the villa and made your way to the lounge outside your bedroom. Tyler sat down, taking you with him so that you were sitting between his legs and leaning on his chest. "Coming up with a name is a lot harder than I thought it was going to be."

 "I know. We are going to have to put some serious thought into this." He was rubbing the baby as you laid back and looked at the stars.

 "I've always liked how your middle name is your dad's."

 "So you want the baby's middle name to be Paul if it's a boy?"

 You looked back at your husband. "No silly, I want it to be Tyler. That is unless you want a Tyler Paul Seguin the second?"

 "Nah. If we have a boy, I want them to have their own name, especially if he decides to play hockey." Tyler had really thought a lot about naming your child. You weren't sure why that surprised you but it did. From day one he'd made everything about you and the baby his number one priority, so this was no different.

 "Well, at least I don't have to worry about calling you big Ty and little Ty."

 "Little Ty already got us into this. Though I will add he's not so little."

 "Oh my god, you are too much." He was gathering up your dress, hiking it up to your hips.

 "Sounds like someone needs a demonstration to prove Lil Ty's size." His lips pressed to the hollow of your neck, a spot that always drove you wild; while his hands slid up your inner thighs.

 "Ty, we're literally outside, in plain view."

 "So…no one will see. The beach is private, and I doubt any of our friends are going to be stopping over." The heel of his hand pressed down on your clit and you arched back against his chest as a moan fell from your lips. "You can leave the dress on if it makes you feel better." His fingers pushed your panties aside so that they could slip between your folds. "Have you been this wet all day, just waiting until we can be alone like this?"

 You hated that he was right. All the photos the two of you had taken, had your mind thinking about when Tyler would touch you just like he was now. You moaned out a yes, as he continued to wiggle his fingers inside of you. His teeth caught your earlobe and he nibbled on it, causing you to shiver in his arms even though the air was still warm. "Turn around and straddle me, babe." He lifted you then, to help you stand. Right as you went to climb back on him, Tyler stopped you. "Panties off babe." He'd had you so hot and bothered, you didn't even register that they were still on. While you stripped off your panties, he undid the fly of his khakis and shoved them halfway down his legs.

 As soon as you were divested of everything that covered the bottom half of your body, you gathered your dress and straddled your husband; sinking down on him as his cock filled you up. His hands were on your hips as you adjusted to him inside you. "Fuck baby, you are so beautiful." Leaning down you pressed your lips to his, as you started to ride him; moving up and down slowly. Your hair fanned around your face, concealing you both from everything outside, and part of you wondered what kind of picture the two of you made in that particular moment.

 His hips thrust up into you and had his mouth not been on yours, you would've screamed out loud. You ground your hips down on him, creating a friction between your bodies that set your body alive. His mouth broke from yours, "Fuck baby, do that again." This time as you did, he held your hips down and pistoned his cock into you. Within minutes you felt your orgasm start to build. "That's it babe, cum for me." The combination of his words and cock thrusting into you sent you over the edge, and you tossed your head back as your orgasm hit, just like the waves crashing on the shore. With a few last pumps into you, Tyler followed you, as you felt his hot cum squirt inside you.

 Your baby bump kept you from collapsing as much as you wanted to on Tyler, and he must have realized that, as he rolled onto his side, taking you with him. The two of you just lay there getting your breathing out of control. Tyler stroked your back, as you lazily drew on his chest. "I love you so much." You softly whispered to him.

 "Not as much as I love you." It was almost surreal, the two of you laying there under the stars. If someone had asked you a year ago where you'd be at; you would've never said married to Tyler with a baby on the way. Yet here the two of you were happier than you ever been. How long you stayed like that, you didn't know. It wasn't until a breeze blew off the water and you shivered in Tyler's arms, that he scooped you up off the lounge and carried you inside to bed. He peeled the dress off your body, then stripped himself naked before crawling into bed with you.

 The following days were spent relaxing on the beach. The boys would play spikeball from time to time. Everyone even joined in a game of beach volleyball, well everyone except you, as you ended up being all-time scorekeeper and referee. There was a lot of lounging by the pool, with mixed drinks in hand, non-alcoholic for you of course; and dinners were always a big event full of great food and lively conversation. Most nights, you and Tyler would take walks on the beach that always resulted in you making love either outdoors or back at the villa. All in all, it was the best babymoon/honeymoon you could ask for. You were all sad to leave but looked forward to when you could all be together over the summer.

 The plane ride home was no different than the one you took down. Tyler making you walk every so often to make sure you kept your circulation going. The following day, you had a checkup with your ob/gyn who assured you everything looked great and that the trip had, had no ill effects on your pregnancy. Which was a huge relief to both you and Tyler.

 The two of you fell back into your normal routine, him going to practices, while you took care of things at the house. You had about four days before Tyler's birthday, and you planned a small surprise party for him at the house. His parents and sisters were able to fly in for the occasion and after an intimate dinner with family and a few friends, everyone headed back to your house where you surprised Tyler. "Babe, when did you do all this?"

 "I had some time on my hands." You said with a coy little wink. "Now go enjoy your party." He kissed you quickly before he got taken away by some of his teammates wishing him a happy birthday and plying him with drinks. When you'd first told him you'd been pregnant he'd totally stayed away from alcohol since you couldn't drink and he'd only drank very few times since then. Tonight was one of those nights, and as you watched a couple people hand him shots, you knew it was going to be a long night.

 About an hour into the party, you lit the candles on the cake you had bought and carried it over to your husband. The entire place sang Happy Birthday, the smile on Tyler's face growing wider as the song ended. "Happy Birthday hun. Make a wish."

 "I already have everything I could ever want." He said it loud enough that the entire place could hear it and you caught yourself grinning from ear to ear. Once he blew out the candles, his mom took the cake from you so that it could be cut for the party; while Tyler grabbed you around the waist. His breath smelled of alcohol and you chuckled as it tickled your ear. "Thank you for this. You're the best wife in the world." His words were a bit slurred as he pressed sloppy kisses to your neck.

 "Did you just call (Y/N) your wife?" Of course, Cassidy was in earshot and would've heard him call you that. Your mind went blank for a minute, and you could tell Tyler had no clue what to say in his inebriated state.

 Thankfully, your brain started to process things and you found yourself saying. "It's silly really, especially since we're not married yet. I think he's practicing so I don't give him hell in the future." She seemed to accept your answer as she headed into the kitchen to help with the cake. Twisting in Tyler's arm, you smacked him playfully before chiding him. "You've got to stop calling me that, or your family is going to find out."

 "I'm sorry," He breathed out. "I'm just so used to it just being us. I'll be more careful." He kissed you then and you could taste the alcohol on his lips.

 "Babe, you might want to slow down a bit." You warned. "You have a game tomorrow, remember?"

 He nodded his agreement. "I know babe. People keep handing me drinks."

 "Well just go a little slower." You kissed him again, before wiggling out of his arms. He frowned at you. "I'm going to go help your mom in the kitchen."

 He grabbed your waist and pulled you back to him. "Babe, she can handle it. Come and just enjoy the party with me. I haven't got to be with you all night." The pouty look on his face, had you giving in to him.

 "Ok, but can we at least have a piece of cake?"

 "If my baby needs cake, then that's what we will get." He kept you locked in his embrace as the two of you waddled over to the island where his mom had set out plates of dessert. You grabbed one off the counter and took a forkful getting ready to bring it to your mouth, when Tyler snuck in, taking the bite from you. "What..it's my birthday." He mumbled through his mouthful of cake.

 "And I'm your pregnant w…." You caught yourself, right as his mom came over. Quickly you shoved a piece of cake in your mouth.

 "You two look like you're up to no good."

 "Nah we did that months ago mom, that's how she got this way." Oh my god had Tyler really just said that; your husband really had no filter when he drank, even with his mother.

 "Sorry Jackie, he's drinking way too much for someone who hasn't drunk in a few months."

 "Oh please (Y/N), that's not the worst he's ever said, that's for sure. How are you feeling sweetie? You've done so much for this party; you need to sit down and prop up your feet."

 "Awe that's so sweet, but I'm fine."

 "Though I'm dragging her away now so that she can spend time with me," Tyler interjected, as he continued to keep his arms wrapped around you, but pulled you away at the same time.

 "Tyler!" you chided him.

 "Babe, it's my birthday." He whined.

 With an eyeroll, you told him, "You've used that excuse already, but I guess I'll let it slide." You gave him a quick little peck on the cheek. "So where exactly are you taking me in this house full of people?" He opened the french doors and slid you both outside.

 The chill in the air caused you to shiver, and Tyler wrapped his arms tighter around you. "I got you, babe."

 "Ty, it's freezing, what are we doing out here?"

 "I just needed a quiet place so I could tell you thank you for the party, but more importantly, I love you." He twisted your body so you were facing him then, peppering you with kisses.

 "Ty, the party?"

 "Can wait for a few minutes." He captured your lips, molding his mouth to yours, and for several minutes you forgot that your house was full of people. When he finally broke from you, you both were breathing heavily. "I plan on thanking you properly once all these people leave. I love you (Y/N), thanks for making all my dreams come true."

 "I love you too, Ty."

[allie1804-fan]

The Middle of the Road (Chapter 16)

Chapter 1,  2,  3,  4,  5,  6,  7,  8 , 9, 10, 11 , 12,  13  14 , 15

Warnings: None

September 2024 – Toronto Emily and Keanu flopped down on the bed in their room at the apartment they were renting in Toronto for the week of The Toronto International Film Festival. They had just arrived from LA and were travel weary. He had just had his 60th birthday and would be receiving a Tribute award at the festival, a great honour for any film maker but an especially treasured one for Keanu who had grown up in the city. He remembered when the festival used to take place in his neighbourhood of Yorkville in the late 70s so the whole event was very close to his heart.

The whole family had decamped from LA including their Nanny Maria which would enable them to attend the evening events as well as do some promotion.  Keanu had done voice work in a film being premiered there which had a U certificate so they would all attend the afternoon screening. They were taking a bit of a risk with Hannah but Emily or the nanny would be able to take her or Johnny out if either of them got unsettled.

 After they had rested up a bit, they all went out to a local Italian restaurant around the corner from the apartment and enjoyed a simple relatively quick meal before getting the babies back home to bed.  The next morning found Keanu and Emily enjoying some free time looking around his old haunts – he’d shown her his home in Yorkville, his elementary  school, ice hockey stadium, the Leah Poslun Theatre and the location of his first kiss!

 “Right there?”? Emily was pointing with an aghast expression on her face at a dingy alley behind a bike rack at the back of an old Walgreens store.

 “Yup – I know. I’ve got a bit classier in my old age I hope you agree.”

 “And what was her name?”

 “Angela”

 “Now THAT is a 70s name if ever I heard one. I guess at least your name is just totally unique and not linked to an era like some”

 “She was sweet – but not long lasting!”  Anyway, I think that is the complete high, and low, lights for you. We better get back and get  some lunch before this afternoon’s shenanigans”  He was referring to the premiere of his film which was an afternoon affair so kids could attend. Some local children would attend as well as press and the stars and their families. Johnny and Hannah would be there – with the exit strategy of mum or nanny if it was too much. They had watched films at home and had quite good attention spans but Hannah had only been in a movie theatre once and so was a bit if an unknown quantity behaviour wise.

It was also to be their first red carpet as a family. They had kept the children well shielded so far but, accepting that  complete privacy wasn’t realistic, they had decided to attend this premiere all together. They all dressed in smart casual clothes rather than the suits and ballgown style of Oscars and that was needed given they would have the kids next to them snacking on ice cream! The press and fans were enthralled with the kids, both dark haired and with big brown eyes strongly favouring Keanu but with the delicacy of Emily’s features. After letting her walk on wobbly legs for a little while, Keanu scooped Hannah up and carried her while Emily walked with Jonathan and Marie brought the buggy and a change bag just in case. Hannah loved waving at everyone and fans called her name which made her laugh. Johnny joined in with waving too, sensing that this was something special but not really at all clear what. It was going to be a while before they understood that their Dad wasn’t just special to them!

The kids enjoyed the film and made it through the whole hour and half without a melt down to everyone’s relief.

That evening Emily and Keanu appeared on a panel about a project they were working on together. There were inevitable questions about how husband and wife could work together which they fended off deftly  - working together was after-all how they met and it felt easy compared to parenting and they were glad to keep the topic work focussed.  In the next couple of days they each took part in other promo for their work and had a meal out, just the two of them.  There they talked about the award show that would be the following night.

                                                            “You nervous?” Emily asked as she sipped her coffee.

“Am I ever!” He groaned. “All that intention is intense – I’m used to parts of it – the red carpet, the photos, being filmed in the audience, even being on stage handing out awards or receiving a less significant gong but such focus, and a speech – phew, it’s crazy”

“It’s what you deserve honey, you know that inside don’t you”

 He shook his head,

 “It’s an honour, such an honour but, no,  I don’t know it – it just feels surreal”

 “Well just try to enjoy it if you can, hun – OK?, Want to run through the speech back at the apartment?”

 “Sure, that would be great to have a writer’s input”

 The award day came and they passed as much of it as they could focussing on the kids, taking them to one of the lakeside beaches for playtime and a picnic but eventually time came for the ‘dressing up game’  as Keanu called it. Both of them would spend a few hours being “made beautiful” for the cameras with stylists primping and polishing their hair, clothes and make up to within an inch of their lives. They left the children with Maria and they would tune in later to see Mommy and Daddy on the TV walking the red carpet.

Emily was wearing a stunning sleeveless, full length taffeta gown in red and her birthday necklace to match her ruby engagement ring and Keanu was in the tux he’d worn to the 2020 Oscars.  Emily’s palms were sweaty even before they left to go to the theatre. She’d attended public occasions before where there were paparazzi but only one awards show about 4 years ago so she was nervous of the attention, especially as the news of their marriage was still quite fresh.

As they climbed out of the car, Keanu whispered in her ear  “Just imagine everyone naked”  before they started to make their way up the red carpet, making her giggle and relax just a little.

“I feel like the wives in Apollo 13, if they ask me anything. I’ll just say “I’m proud, happy and thrilled”

“Are you likening me getting an award to going to the moon or a life-threatening mission?!”

“the former for you and maybe the latter for me!”

At first she held Keanu’s arm in a death grip but gradually she relaxed especially as she saw the smiling faces in the crowd and she saw Keanu relax too, signing photos, DVDs and books and posing for photos. Several fans encouraged her to pose alongside him, surprising her.  It seemed some people were happy to see him happy with his marriage and kids and thus welcomed her with open arms.

There were a few reporters on the red carpet who stopped them for a few words. Keanu made her laugh, though she tried to hold it in, when he responded to the question of how he was feeling to be receiving the Tribute Award.

“Well I’m proud, happy and thrilled” he said, giving Emily a wink which made the laughter bubble to the surface. They moved on and at last made it into the auditorium and were shown to their seats.

There were several other awards before his but at last it was time for his big moment.

The presentation started with a show reel with clips from his most famous movies as well as some of his lesser known early ones which made him blush. He leaned over and whispered to Emily

“At least they’re not showing the Coke and cornflakes ads!”

After the reel, there were some video clips from some of his directors and co-stars praising – his work, his character and his work ethic. There was Chad Stahelski, Sandy Bullock, Carrie-Ann Moss and Lilly Wachowski. Then it was time for the award  itself which Lana Wachowski presented. As he walked up to the stage, the whole auditorium stood, clapping and cheering. He was right, Emily thought, this was really overwhelming! She dabbed a tear away as he took his place at the podium and took a moment to let the applause fade.

“Firstly let me say a huge thank you for this great, great honour  - to receive this in the city where I spent my formative years is really very special so thank you.”

More applause erupted then quickly subsided allowing him to continue.

“I owe this award to many other people  - first and foremost,  I’d like to pay tribute to my mom for believing in me all those years ago when I asked her one day, would it be ok if I was an actor and  she simply said ‘whatever you want son’.

And thanks must also go of course to the teachers and directors at the schools where I did plays and at the Leah Posluns Theatre where I really began to learn my craft-  thank you for lighting the fire.

Looking back, the reel you showed just now only served to remind me how much I love movies. And a key reason over the years for that love and indeed for much of my success has been the joy of collaboration when making them. Collaboration with many wonderful directors, actors, cinematographers, stunt coordinators, make-up artists, caterers, runners to name but a few is what I thrive on. And they have all made me look good.  And I know sometimes I’ve made my fellow actors look good too by how bad I was! Special thanks to Winona and Gary in that regard!

And I can’t forget the writers, for one thing my wife would never forgive me if I didn’t give them a mention.”

Keanu looked over and caught Emily’s eye as she sat in the front row beaning with pride.

“Writers have gifted me some amazing, memorable characters, some of them coming back time and again  like Ted, Neo and John Wick.  And I think special thanks are due for all the Johns, Johnny’s and Jacks and the quarterback punks that have been a recurring theme for me and such fun to play.

So I love movies and I love the opportunity they give me to tell stories.

But this year, as I hit a big milestone birthday,  I am in a new phase in my life and I’m planning on being focussed less on the stories in films and more on my own story.  Over the years, my fellow actors and the crews have been like family to me, a band of brothers and sisters if you will.  But 5 years ago I met and fell in love with a wonderful woman and she became my family.  Then 2 years ago we became parents - and now there are 4 of us. And this year  I also became a husband - in all these things as you can probably tell I was a late starter!

So whilst I’m not retiring,  going forward I can’t and I don’t want to be the man who  is all work and no play.  I want to be with my beautiful  wife and my kids as they grow and play my part in guiding them in their lives, in their story.

And hopefully, I’ll bring the riches of that experience of being a parent and a husband to my future roles.

Thank you”

There was rapturous applause at this end to his speech and Emily found herself crying once again at his very public commitment to a more balanced life for them all going forward.

Keanu took his leave, heading back stage where there would be a few interviews to do before he could re-join Emily and head onto the after-party.  There was a brief break in proceedings and Emily made her way back stage to meet up with him.

Keanu was just taking his leave from one of the news teams  when he glimpsed Emily weaving her way between the throngs of stage hands, actors and publicists.

He headed in her direction and indicated a small alcove to the side to aim for. She reached it first and waited for him to join her, his progress being slowed by people stopping to congratulate him on his award and speech. When he finally got there, she threw he arms around his neck.

“That was, just, just”

“Wow  have I actually rendered you speechless?” he laughed.

“You didn’t share THAT part of the speech!”

“You mean the bit about marrying a wonderful woman and sharing my story with her?”

“yes that part, you sneaky devil, you made me cry”

“Happy tears I hope?”

“Yes!” she smiled planting a kiss on his smiling lips.

@penwieldingdreamer @fortheloveoffanfic @kindainlovewithkeanu @ladyreapermc @witty-wallflower @gatsbynouvel @bitchyslut99 @keanureevesisbae @omg-imagine @iworshipkeanureeves @fics-not-tragedies @ficsnroses @kindainlovewithkeanu @paperplanesandwallflowers

[backtothestart02]

Muse | Chapter 15 [5.04]

A/N: My take on that Iris-burning-pancakes scene before I watched the episode. Enjoy!

*Many thanks to @valeriemperez for beta’ing.

...

Inspiration: Candice Patton spoiling that Iris would be making pancakes in a future ep + snippets of that happening in the 5.04 flashtime promo.

...

From the very first night Iris had been hesitant but hopeful about Nora staying at the loft. She wanted a connection with her daughter more than anything. Barry had told her what she wanted to hear, and she loved her husband for that, but still longed for substantial proof from their offspring that she would at the very least meet her halfway. Since daily interactions had yet to improve, Iris decided to try a different tactic: cooking.

Now, anyone who knew her knew she wasn’t a good cook. They didn’t flat out say it, but Iris knew it wasn’t her specialty. Because her family and friends loved her they responded to her cooking by complimenting her on something else or distracting her entirely, in Barry’s case usually sex.

But she knew she had to try. The thought that there were possibly no well-cooked meals for her and her daughter in the future due to Barry’s absence made her heart ache. Surely, she had not sunk so low as to resort to cereal and toast – well, cereal - for breakfast in the future.

Despite her lack of expertise in the area, Iris had always told herself that before she got married she would learn how to be a good cook. She’d been told the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach at a young age and never forgotten it. Of course, Barry fell for her long before she even contemplated trying to win him over, so that hadn’t been an issue. Her deadline for learning the skill then moved to before they had kids. What kind of mother would she be if she couldn’t cook amazing meals for her children?

Of course, that had been before their very adult child showed up on their doorstep less than a day after the team had defeated Devoe, leaving Iris no time to prepare to become even a decent cook. Sure, there had been a couple weeks before Nora physically moved in with them, but they’d been so busy and emotionally drained, and honestly Iris had kept to herself more, not wanting to squash Barry’s happiness over bonding with their daughter. But no longer.

Third day trying, she was going to make pancakes for her daughter and they would not be black or taste like charcoal. She was not using a malfunctioning toaster. She was using pancake mix, a world-class stove, pristine pans and spatulas. This was going to work.

…

Upstairs in his and Iris’ bedroom, Barry awoke from the smell wafting up from downstairs. At first, he was intrigued, his mouth starting to water. Then there was a sharp sizzle and damn it! from his lovely wife, and he knew exactly what was happening.

“Not again,” he muttered worriedly but quickly pulled on some sweats and a sweatshirt and cautiously went down the steps so as not to startle her.

He waited for a few moments. Nora was out already. Surprisingly, she’d gotten up earlier than even him and went on a morning run. She’d probably be back soon, though. Iris had gotten up early ever since Nora had started saying with them, depriving Barry of morning sex and cuddles. He knew the reason behind it though and was determined to be supportive, which was easier said than done when the one tactic Iris was using to bond with their daughter was cooking.

“Do you need any help?” he asked, inching forward.

Iris flipped six small burnt pancakes, agitated at how quickly things had gone downhill.

“No!” she cried, reaching for the plate to put her first failed batch on as soon as they were ready.

“Maybe if you just turn the heat dow-”

“Barry, I don’t need-”

But in her exasperation, her elbow hit the bowl of pancake mix and sent it crashing to the ground. That is, if Barry hadn’t witnessed it tipping off the counter and caught it mid-air.

Iris could barely catch her breath she was so relieved. She stared at the bowl in his hands, momentarily spellbound and completely missing how some of the mix had flown up into his hair.

“Perks of marrying a speedster, I guess,” she marveled.

“Iris. Iris, the pancake- The pancakes, Iris!”

She turned to look back at her sizzling pan and found her pancakes even more burnt on the second side than they’d been on the first. Her shoulders slumped, and she set her spatula down, defeated.

“Hey, it’s…” Barry reached around her to turn the heat down half the height it had been at. “It’s okay, Iris. The heat was just a little high, so you weren’t flipping soon enough. They were done seconds after they hit the pan.”

Her bottom lip trembled, her eyes filling with tears.

“Iris?”

He set the bowl down, far enough from the edge of the counter that he wouldn’t be afraid of it falling again and pulled her to him.

“I can’t…I-I can’t even…I c-c-can’t even cook pancakes for her, Barry. What kind of a mother… I… Why can’t I just…”

“Hey, hey.” He pulled her into his arms and rocked her gently. “You’re an amazing mother, Iris. You’re doing the best you can. Nora’s just been glued to me because she hasn’t known me her whole life.” He pulled away slowly and cupped her face, wiping away the tears that traveled down it. “Okay?”

She nodded, sniffling, but he knew she didn’t really believe him.

“Why don’t you let me help you?” he suggested gently.

She stiffened.

“You’ll still be doing it,” he insisted. “I’ll just be guiding you, assisting you. I’ll be like…your assistant chef.”

She snorted. “Barry Allen, assistant chef to failed cook, Iris West-Allen.”

“Hey, hey, none of that.” He turned her back to the counter, wrapping his hands around her arms to guide her. “Grab the bowl now.”

She sighed loudly but did as he said. Despite herself she felt a peace wash over her at the feel of him around her, helping her, his lips over her ear as he directed what she do next.

“Okay, set the bowl down,” he said after she’d thoroughly mixed it again. “Now turn the heat up – a little though, not a lot. Okay, stop there. Good. Now get the bowl. And pou- Good,” he praised, and her face lit up with a smile.

“Now what?” she asked.

“Now we wait.”

Her eyes widened, and she spun half around to face him.

“Not too long, though. Otherwise they’ll get-”

“Not too long,” he said, placing a finger over her lips. “Just…trust me, Iris, okay? We got this.”

He winked, sending a chill down her spine.

Oh, no.

This was not good. This was terrible.

Sexy chef was one of Barry Allen’s best looks. Without fail, it always made her weak in the knees.

Sexy ass chef helping her cook? Lord, it was a miracle she wasn’t undressed already.

“Okay, now flip. Flip, Iris!”

Her eyes widened, and she turned her attention back to the pan, flipping the pancakes one by one just in time before the light brown turned darker. She gasped at the success, ignoring Barry’s chuckle from behind her.

“I did it!”

He pressed a kiss to her neck.

“Yes, you did. Though you got distracted for a second there, didn’t you?”

She turned her head to look at him and raised an eyebrow.

“Are you going to deny it?” he teased, allowing his hand lazily resting on her torso to start drifting south.

“Barry, no.”

“You’re not?” He pouted, halting his hand. “Or you are?” It moved again, successfully dipping into her panties.

“Barry, Aaallen!” She stepped out of reach, then pointing her spatula at him with ferocity as he laughed. “Do not – do not even go there. We do not have time for this. Nora is going to be back any minute, and she cannot walk in on us doing-”

“Flip.”

“Wha-”

He glanced at the pan, and she hurriedly flipped the new set of pancakes on top of the burnt ones. She then poured some more of the mix onto the pan, and it started to sizzle again.

“See,” he said, pinning her to the counter after she turned around. “You got this.”

She shook her head at him. This dork who drove her crazy. That cocky smile on his face, that glint of amusement in his eye, the tip of his tongue darting out between his lips for no more than a second, telling her loud and clear what he wanted – her; right here, right now.

“Barry-”

His lips descended onto hers, and she melted into the kiss, unabashedly moaning. He kissed her again and again, and she forgot all about pancakes. Barry Allen’s mouth was much better, felt incredible, relaxed her in ways she hadn’t been for a while. She suddenly regretted shutting down sex the past few nights in favor of getting beauty sleep to prepare for successfully cooking breakfast.

“Flip,” he whispered into her ear sultrily.

“Hmm?”

“Flip!”

Her eyes flashed open. “What? Oh!” And she flipped them. Just in time. Again. “Oh my God. I almost-” She scowled at him. “You! You and your sexiness and your-”

“Me and my sexiness told you when to flip. You’re welcome,” he said and pressed a kiss to her cheek before pulling away.

She stayed mad at him for all of two seconds – because he was right, and she was grateful to him, and he was sexy as hell and walking away from her, and she couldn’t have that.

“W-wait!”

He stopped and looked over his shoulder at her.

“Where are you going?” she demanded.

He shrugged. “Maybe on a run. I’m not sure yet.”

“B-but-”

“Flip.”

She flipped almost without looking and found she’d created another set of pancakes successfully.

“You don’t need me, Iris,” he said, his tone switching from flirtatious to appraising. “You’re doing a great job.”

Her heart warmed and suddenly her role of wife superseded her role of desperate-to-be-perfect mother.

“C’mere, Barry.” She smiled softly, and he returned it, walking back over to her.

In the next five minutes, two more batches of pancakes had been cooked up, none with even the hint of being burnt, and Barry and Iris were making out against the counter, ravenous for the time they’d lost.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!”

They pulled apart instantly, making themselves as presentable as they could given their already half-undressed selves.

“Nora!” Barry announced cheerfully. “Come have breakfast! Your mother made pancakes.”

“Oh, great.” She forced a smile. “Just like the last two days…”

Iris swallowed the hurt that came with that tone. Maybe Nora wasn’t trying to be hurtful. It was certainly something anyone else could have said. But it hurt more coming from her.

“Even better,” Barry said. “Look.”

Reluctantly, Nora walked over to see the plate of delicious looking pancakes. Her eyes widened, and she turned to Iris.

“You made these?” She gawked.

Iris stomped the hurt down again, and Barry tensed beside her, setting his hands on her shoulders. His eyebrows narrowed angrily.

“Nora.”

She flushed. “I-I-I’m sorry, I just-” She cleared her throat and grabbed a couple. “Thank you. They look great.”

Iris held Barry’s hand and looked up at him, mouthing a ‘thank you’. He nodded and brushed it aside. No words were needed.

“Oh, schway, these are really good!” Nora declared, greedily eating up the pancakes she’d snatched.

Her parents turned to her, both critical of her reception.

“I mean it,” she said, swallowing her bite. “Thanks, Mom.”

Iris’ heart melted.

Barry pressed a kiss to his wife’s head and grabbed the plate of pancakes, in addition to other condiments and approached the table where his daughter was sitting.

“Want some butter and syrup with that or are you just going to inhale it speedster style?”

Nora paused, then laughed and smiled. Iris felt a twinge of jealousy, but she brushed it aside. Progress had been made.

“Speedster or not, it tastes better with both,” Iris said, confidently strutting over with a few more plates for the three of them. “Just…don’t eat the bottom ones. They’re from my trial phase.”

Nora glanced up at her, and for the briefest moment they smiled at each other. Barry caught it and smiled at Iris when she looked at him. He held his hand out to her, and she came to him, pressing a peck to his swollen lips.

“We’re finishing what was interrupted later,” he murmured into her ear.

She smiled brightly, giddy. “If you’re good,” she responded, and went to sit on the other side of the table.

...

*Also posted on AO3 and FFnet.

[hockey-yesplease]

Young Marriage

Player Mat Barzal (mentions Anthony Beauvillier and Jorban Eberle)

Requested? Yes 

Warnings: body insecurities, swearing, cheating, steamy,

Word count: 1800

Gif from Tenor

People always tell you that 21 is too young to be married, but you and Mat had been married for about a year now. Everything was going great until a few weeks ago. You knew that being married to a NHL player would not be easy, but you didn’t think it would be like this. It's the offseason and you were so excited to be able to spend more time with Mat, but it seemed like he was never home, he was either working out, doing promo shoots, or doing somethings with a few of the guys that were still in town. You don’t mind him doing these things of course, you aren’t this crazy wife that only wants him to yourself, but a simple text message letting you know he wasn’t going to be home for dinner would be nice. 

That’s how you got here, making dinner; there was enough for two since you assumed Mat would be home to eat. You had his plate made and sitting at his spot at the table and your’s was at your spot next to his. After waiting an hour and a half, you decided to just go ahead and warm yours up and eat. After placing Mat’s in a container and placing it in the fridge, you warmed up your food and ate. This was at 9 o’clock at night. You checked your phone for any messages or calls you might have missed, there was none, but you did have a notification from instagram. You open your phone and go to the app, and what you saw broke your heart. A girl, one who was actually nice and happy for you and Mat unlike many others, that followed you, had Dm’ed you a picture and said, “I know you don’t know me personally, but im at the same club at Mat rn and thought you needed to know.” You click on the picture to make it bigger just to see your husband with a girl in his lap and her lips on his neck. And a smile on his face that you haven’t seen in weeks. 

Growing up you had a terrible temper and it still takes all your power to control it, so you decide to be passive aggressive. You grab your HP Sprocket and print the picture the girl sent you and set it on top of the container of his food that you placed in the fridge. You felt numb, you thought everything was going well. That he was just busy with his normal offseason schedule. Well, he was busy, but you weren’t sure what from now, actual work things or other women. You can’t help but pull up the picture again and compare yourself to her. You realized that your not a skinny as her, but you weren’t overweight either. You’re an athlete, you had played volleyball your whole life and still play it at NYU where you go to school full-time so you were thick but it was muscle and toned. You have wavy brown hair, she had pin straight blonde hair. You are 5 feet 9 inches tall and she might be 5 feet 2 inches tall. You have always wondered why Mat chose you, you never saw it. But he loved you enough to marry you. You can’t help to wonder what you had done wrong. You took all online classes for the summer that way you could spend as much time with him as possible this off season.

You hadn’t realized how long you’d been sitting on the couch thinking until you hear the door to y’all’s apartment open and close. Mat walked over to you and leaned down to give you a kiss but stopped, “What’s wrong babes?” Deciding to still be passive aggressive and not having noticed that you had been crying, “Nothing Maty, just stressed with a couple assignment for my online class. Your dinner is in the fridge if you’re hungry.” Mat placed a quick kiss to your lips, “Thanks babes. I’ll warm it up after I shower.” You hum your response. “Okay, really what’s wrong Y/N?” You decide to just tell him part of whats wrong, 

“I miss you Mat, the only time we see each other anymore is first thing in the morning before you leave for the day. We haven’t had a meal together in months. I took these classes online that way we could spend time together, since we don’t get much time during the season.” Mat looked at you, “I’m sorry I actually have a job to do to pay our bills Y/N!” Mat yelled at you. You looked at him in shock, all during your relationship, he has never raised his voice toward you. And he has never made a comment about money, he always had that he wanted you to be able to focus on school and volleyball. That is why he convinced you to quit the small job you had in the first place. You slowly get up off the couch and make your way to the balcony of your apartment knowing that your anger was boiling over right now and didn’t want to say anything you’d regret. Mat doesn’t follow you, instead he makes his way to the bathroom that is in the master bedroom. As you sit, the anger starts to wash away, but is replaced by sadness. Completely heartbroken, you start to sob. Uncontrollable sobs leaving your body surprised even you. You hear the front door open and closed again and assume he left, so you don’t bother getting up and going inside, but then the sliding door that leads to the balcony where you are sitting opened and Tito’s smiling face appeared but vanished quickly once he saw you. Your brother has always been there for you no matter what. He is your twin after all. “Y/N/N, whats wrong? Wheres Barz?” “Teets, I think he’s been cheating on me,” you say as another sob leaves your mouth. He makes his way to pull you into his brotherly embrace,“What makes you think that?”  You explain everything to him, and even show him the picture. “I’m gonna kill him.” “No, Teets, he doesn’t even know that I have this picture yet. I printed it out and put it on his container of food in the fridge.” 

You two hear Mat, “Hey man, what are you doing here?” Anthony turns to look at him, “Just needed to talk to Y/N/N about our mom’s birthday gift. I gotta go now though. I’ll see you later man.” You’re glad he made it seem like nothing was wrong. As he left, you closed the sliding door again, and Mat made his way to the kitchen. You know it was a matter of seconds before he saw the picture. 

You begin sobbing again, not understanding what you did wrong. You had been sobbing so hard, it begins to make you gag, so you run to the bathroom and vomit. After you are done and you brush your teeth, you walk out of the bathroom and see Mat sitting on the bed looking at the photo. You can’t tell what he’s feeling until he looks at you standing up, “WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE?!” Still heartbroken you yell back for the first time in the relationship, “HOW ELSE COULD I GO ABOUT THIS MATHEW!? I FIND OUT YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME FROM ONE OF MY FOLLOWERS ON INSTAGRAM! YOU’RE NEVER HOME AND WE NEVER TALK SO I BROUGHT IT UP THE ONLY WAY I KNEW YOU’D SEE IT!” Mat sat back down on the bed, “I’m so sorry. I’m so so so sorry.” “YOU’RE SORRY?! THAT’S ALL YOU CAN SAY?!” You begin sobbing again. He looks at you “I wasn’t cheating on you babe, I swear. She threw herself onto my lap and started kissing my neck. I was trying to nicely get her off. Right after this happened I pushed her off of me.” “You sure seemed to be enjoying it, Mathew.” “No Y/N this was right when she there herself onto me, I was laughing at something one of the guys said. You can call Ebs and ask him what went down.” You could tell by his voice and look that he was sincere, but you still called Ebs and he explained everything to you. 

“That doesn’t explain why you’re gone so much Mathew. Off season is your break, there’s no way you’re working out that much or have that many promos to do.” He signed, “You’re right, babe. I’m so sorry I’ve been a terrible husband and so distant lately. But being distant was the only way to not tell you what I was doing for you.” He get up and walked over to his dresser and opened a drawer and pulled out a folder. “I’ve been planning a trip for us and working with an agent to make sure I can do everything that you want. I was going to give it to you this weekend for our anniversary, but you deserve it right now. I’ve been a major ass lately and didn’t even realize the effect it had on you. I’m so sorry baby, please please forgive me.” You take the folder that he is handing you and open it. It is a whole 3 week backpack through Europe all planned out. “I know this is something you’ve wanted to do ever since you were little and I wanted to do it for you since you put up with me. You support me when no one else does. You believe in me when I can’t even believe in myself. You sacrifice so much for me. And you do all this while being a sexy, beautiful, smart, athletic, endearing wife. I want to do so much more for you because you deserve it, but I knew you’d probably be aggravated at me with how much this is, so I decided to not plan the rest and just go with the flow.” 

You can’t believe what you’re hearing. You are an emotional wreck right now, completely speechless, you pull Mat into a passionate kiss. Soon you realize how much you need him and he realizes how much he needs you. He pulls you into a bruising kiss while walking you back to the bed until the back of your knees hit the bed, “Please let me show you how sorry I am and how much I love you baby.” You nod and he gently pushes you back onto the bed and crawls to hover over you. 

This day had turned from terrible to simply amazing, and you knew the night was about to get even better.

[theycallmebeccawrites]

Adventures in Parenting - Chris & Nikki Q&A

With Tumblr holding my original writing blog @beccaheartschrisevans captive (aka flagged as explicit), I have made a secondary writing blog and may end up closing the other all together. In the meantime, I am reposting all of my stories on my new blog.

Pairing: Chris Evans x Nikki Evans (OFC) Rating: PG-13 Warnings: language? Summary: A “podcast transcript” of a Q&A with Chris & Nikki set in February 2021.

Adventures in Parenting (Chris & Nikki) Masterlist

Chris & Nikki Q&A (February 2021)

Please note this is written as if it were a blog post with a podcast transcript.

February 17, 2021

Hello my fellow mommies and daddies! I have an extra special treat for you all today! My best friend/sister-in-law, Nikki, and her husband, Chris, have agreed to take part in an extra special podcast right here on my parenting blog!

So what is so special about my fabulous sister- and brother-in-law? Well she is a hot momma of three of the cutest kids on planet earth (joined by my little ones, of course) and he is Captain America…. Or rather, he played Captain America in the Marvel Cinematic Universe for 8 years.

I have been trying to get Nikki to take part in a podcast since I started doing them last year and I finally convinced her to sit down with me this past weekend. Originally it was just going to be the two of us, but then our husbands caught wind of it and decided they wanted to take part as well.

So here is the link to the podcast as well as a link to the transcript in case you can’t download the podcast for whatever reason.

Love Always,

Dana

–Transcript–

Dana: Hello to all my returning listeners and to all my new listeners. Even those of you who are only listening to this podcast because of Chris Evans…

Chris: It’s their loss if they are. You’re awesome and you’re one of the best moms I’ve ever been around.

Mikey: Suck up. [Coughs]

Dana: Thank you Chris. You’re my favorite brother-in-law.

Nikki: [Laughing] Not even a minute into this podcast and we’re already off topic.

Dana: You’re right, Nikki. I meant to start this with introductions. So I will start with myself for those that aren’t familiar with my voice. I am Dana and this is my blog/podcast. Mikey is my husband, we’ve been married for nearly ten years. Say hi, Mikey.

Mikey: Hi Mikey [He and Chris snicker]

Dana: You two are predictable. Moving on… next we have my best friend and partner in crime, Nikki. Who also happens to be Mikey’s step-sister. Say hello to the beautiful listeners Nikki.

Nikki: Hello everyone!

Dana: Last, but certainly not least, I present Nikki’s husband, Chris Evans. Chris say hello.

Chris: [Chuckling] I’m not used to being introduced as Nikki’s husband, I like it…

Nikki: I do too. [Smooching sound]

Mikey: Really? Already with the kissing… you two are gross.

Dana: And this is why this was just supposed to be a podcast with me and Nikki only. I’m going to have so much stuff to edit out.

Nikki: [Laughing] Sorry… I just can’t help myself sometimes. He is just so darn cute!

Chris: Hot… so darn hot!

Dana: Anyway….. Thank you Chris and Nikki for agreeing to take part of this podcast. Mikey and I know how hard you two work to keep your relationship and, especially, your kids, out of the public eye.

Nikki: We love you and we trust you. We know you won’t publish anything too revealing about us and the kids.

Chris: That and we know where you live and we actually have a key to your house and the code to the alarm system… there really isn’t any place you can hide from us…

Mikey: Geez Evans, don’t make me embarrass you by beating you up again. My muscles are just as big as yours.

Chris: Only because I haven’t been busting my as- [clears throat] -er, I mean, only because I haven’t been training as hard as I did when I was playing Cap every six months.

Dana: I told you we should have locked them in the man cave before we started this.

Nikki: [Snickers] Maybe we should just move onto the questions you prepared for us before they start comparing the size of other things…

Chris & Mikey: Nikki!

Dana: Alright, this first question is about how the two of you met. Now, I know Mikey and I already know the answer to this, but our listeners don’t.

Nikki: We met in August 1997, right after my mom and Mikey’s dad got married. I was 12 at the time and Chris was 16.

Chris: Mikey and I have been best friends since we were like 5 years old and we grew up across the street from each other. Our parents actually still live in those same houses. Which makes it very convenient for holidays and such.

Dana: Nikki, you and I have spent a lot of time talking about this. Hell, I’ve known you since before Chris and even Mikey, since we were both the “new girl” at school in 1996. But I’ve never heard Chris’s thoughts about your first meeting.

Chris: Honestly? I didn’t have any. Like Nikki said, she was 12 and I was 16. She was just my best friend’s new kid sister.

Nikki: While I, on the other hand, thought he was the cutest guy I’d ever seen. And I suppose I should mention that I was a month shy of turning 13 when we met.

Dana: So it wasn’t really love at first sight for you guys then.

Mikey: Well Nikki thought she was in love for a while. I found a couple notebooks that had ‘Mrs. Chris Evans’ written in a heart…

Nikki: Chris was the first guy I ever had a crush on, so yeah, I thought I was in love with him. Then he graduated high school and I started liking and, eventually, dating other guys.

Dana: Which leads me directly to how you two got together. And I will start this by informing the listeners that you guys we reintroduced at mine and Mikey’s wedding nearly ten years ago. Nikki was my maid of honor and Chris was Mikey’s best man. So what was it about the other that caught your attention?

Chris: Well, naturally, the first thing I noticed about her was her beauty, especially her smile.

Nikki: And then you realized who I was and you went from flirt mode to protect the bro code mode.

Mikey: Not that he protected it for very long….

Chris: Says the one who married his sister’s best friend….

Dana: Guys… don’t make me put you in time out…

Chris & Mikey: Yes mom

Nikki: [Chuckling] As soon as Chris had a couple beers in him at the rehearsal dinner and found out that Dana and I were best friends, the bro code got tossed out the window

Chris: You’re making me sound like a pig, Nik… I also threw out the code because I saw you interacting with your younger half-sisters and then my family, especially my nephews and something just clicked in my head. I knew you were the one when my nephew put a chocolate hand print on that pink sundress you were wearing and instead of freaking out like girls I had dated in the past, you just laughed it off and gave him a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.

Nikki: Oh, Chris! [Sniffles] You’ve never told me that before. I didn’t even know you’d witnessed that. Much less knew that night that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with me.

Chris: I’ve meant to tell you for a while now, but I guess I never did. Especially, since I had to spend six weeks convincing you that I really wanted to be in a relationship with you.

Mikey: I remember those six weeks. Here I was a newlywed, expecting to get extra loving from my new wife only to find myself in bed alone while Dana was on the phone with Nikki for hours and hours.

Nikki: It was a lot to take in. Chris and I hadn’t seen each other for 13 years and he was a few weeks away from the release of the first Captain America. Plus I was attracted to him, but I wasn’t sure if what I was feeling for him was real and adult or just left over from my youth.

Chris: And she waited until I was in the middle of the promo tour to agree to a date with me. Then after the promo tour and premier was over for the movie, I had to report back to filming for Avengers. So we didn’t have our first date until the middle of August.

Dana: Tell us about your first date.

Nikki: I bought a great dress for it and he got to my apartment and told me to go change into pants because I couldn’t do what we were going to do in a dress.

Chris: I told you to change after I told you how gorgeous you looked and that I would happily change the plans I had made for us.

Nikki: That’s right, you did. But you’d been telling me for weeks over text messages and the phone that you’d planned a great first date for us and I didn’t want you to change anything.

Mikey: You guys went mini golfing right?

Chris: Yeah, I took her out for dinner and then we went mini golfing. She totally beat me.

Nikki: I still don’t believe I beat you without you throwing the game. You love golfing, I don’t. I’m good at sports that don’t require me to hold on to something.

Chris: I didn’t let you win. I was just distracted by your beauty and wishing I had kissed you the minute you’d opened your front door.

Nikki: [Laughing] You are so full of bs.

Mikey: [Groans] Again with the kissing?! Dana ask them another question!

Dana: So Chris said he knew the night you guys were reintroduced that you were the one he wanted to marry. When did you know you wanted to marry Chris, Nikki?

Nikki: I knew by my birthday, which was about a month after our first date. He was in Ohio for most of that time because of filming, but we spent just about every free moment we had talking on the phone or texting.

Chris: I wooed her.

Nikki: You did.

Dana: How long was it before you guys started talking about getting married? I mean, it couldn’t have been long because Chris proposed on New Year’s Eve.

Chris: I think our first conversation about marriage and kids happened when she came to visit me while I was filming in Ohio, which was in like mid to late September.

Nikki: It was just after the Patriot’s game ended. I was due to leave the next morning and I think we stayed up most of the night just talking about where we saw ourselves in ten years.

Chris: And look where we are now. It’s been nearly ten years and everything we dreamed about has come true. We have three amazing kids, two great dogs and a terrible cat.

Nikki: [Laughing] Oh don’t even say that. You love Sadie as much as the rest of us do.

Dana: So where do you guys see yourselves in ten years?

Mikey: Wait! You teased about the proposal, shouldn’t you ask them about that first before moving on to the future?

Dana: Oh, right. Quick recap of the proposal and wedding?

Chris: [Chuckling] Like you said, I proposed to her on New Year’s Eve in 2011. My mom was hosting a party at her house and, like always, Nikki and Mikey’s parents offered her use of their fridge for extra food. So my mom, who was totally in on the whole plan, sent Nikki and I across the street to get more food and I proposed to Nikki in the kitchen where we met back in 1997.

Dana: [Squeals] I know I knew about it ahead of time and I’ve known the story for ten years, but I just get excited whenever I hear one of you guys tell that story! Just gives me all the feels!

Mikey: The feels? Seriously? Are people still saying that? Wasn’t that like soooo five years ago?

Nikki: It gives me the feels too. Especially when you add the fact that we got married nearly 15 years to the day that we first met.

Dana: If only that venue had been available on the August 1st instead of August 4th.

Chris: I think it all worked out perfectly in the end, just the way we wanted it to.

Nikki: It really was perfect. We got married at this fully restored, 100 year old barn about thirty minutes from Sudbury. It was a gorgeous venue.

Chris: And a gorgeous bride.

Nikki: Don’t forget the hot groom who was rocking a sexy suit.

Chris: You know me, I won’t wear a suit that isn’t sexy.

Mikey: Ugh seriously! [Groans] Dana ask them the 10 year question so they stop making out over there

Dana: [Laughing] Alright, for real this time. Where do you two see yourselves in ten years. Both career and family wise.

Chris: Family wise, I think we’re both open to having more kids.

Nikki: I’d love more kids. Whether it be through us having more biological children or adopting from within the United States or even internationally.

Mikey: You’re almost 40, Chris [Grunts in pain] Hey! What was that for!

Chris: For reminding me I’m almost 40, but please continue…

Mikey: Promise not to hit me again?

Chris: You have thirty seconds to spit out whatever you were going to say.

Mikey: [Talks fast] How late into your 40s do you plan on having kids? Because Rachie is almost 4 and you’re going to be 54 when she graduates high school.

Chris: I haven’t really thought about it too much, if I’m being totally honest. I suppose I should though…

Nikki: I think that is totally ok, it’s not like we can change anything after the fact. Some people meet their significant other young and have kids young. We didn’t and that is totally ok, too. So we’ll be old when our youngest babies graduate high school… that’s perfectly fine with me as long as you’re by my side.

Mikey: [Groans] And they’re kissing again, honestly you two!

Dana: What about career wise? You just did your first animated film with Disney, didn’t you Chris?

Chris: I’m not technically allowed to talk about it just yet… but yes, I’m lending my voice to an animated character and it’s not what people would expect from me. But other than that, I’ve enjoyed taking some time off with Nikki and the kids, but I’ve also enjoyed doing some theater and getting behind the camera some more too.

Dana: I suppose we should move onto the parenting questions since this is a parenting blog. However, because we’ve already used up more than two-thirds of our podcast time, we’ll have to be quick with these questions so we can play ‘Who is’

Nikki: Sounds good to me.

Dana: Alright, since we are short on time, I will just inform the listeners that you two have three kids, a 7 year old, a 5 year old and a 3 year old. Do they have set bedtimes?

Chris: We try to keep them on the same schedule as much as possible, but life happens and sometimes you have to roll with the punches.

Nikki: On the weeks we do manage to have all the kids in bed by 8 and asleep by 8:30, we have a family movie night on Friday and we let the kids stay up an extra half hour.

Dana: What a perfect transition to my next question! We grew up without a lot of the technology that is a part of our everyday lives now. There are hundreds of studies about kids and their addictions to phones, iPads, computers and other things even as young as 2 or 3. How are you guys dealing with that?

Chris: Nikki and I both realized how attached we were to our phones when Josh was born and we kind of took a step back from things. Especially when he wanted to hold said phones. But we have set rules in place to help limit their use of technology.

Nikki: We have lots of timers and electronics that turn themselves off and remain off for certain amounts of time. We’ve had to adjust some of Josh’s computer time to allow for the homework assignments that require him to be on the computer, though.

Chris: Nikki and I are both outdoorsy people

Mikey: [Snorts with laughter]

Chris: Ok… so I’m an outdoorsy person and Nikki tolerates it as long as I don’t make her sleep in a tent without an air mattress, go more than two days without showering or using a flushing toilet, and or make her touch a fish.

[All four laughing]

Chris: But like I was saying, our kids love being outdoors as well. The boys love splashing around in the rain and mud in the spring and fall as much as they door running through the sprinkler in the summer. And they love playing outside in the snow.

Nikki: Like father, like sons.

Chris: Exactly. So yes, we try to limit the amount of time they spend using technology, but we understand that it is a part of their future, we just want them to find a happy medium.

MIkey: So we’re all in agreement that our kids and your kids aren’t getting cell phones until they’re teenagers.

Chris: I was thinking more like sixteen. If they prove that they’re responsible enough for one.

Nikki: We really are ancient aren’t we? I’m pretty sure mom and dad got the twins cellphones for their 10th birthday.

Dana: I don’t want to think about how old we are. [Whines] Let’s play ‘Who Is’ instead!

Dana: So I’ll ask a question and you guys either answer with your own name or the other’s name.

Mikey: Am I playing?

Dana: No, just Nik and Chris.

Mikey: I’ll go get another drink then. Chris you want one?

Chris: Sounds good.

Dana: Alright, first question. Who is the cuddle bug?

Nikki: Depends on the situation, we both can be cuddly

Chris: But it’s usually her

Dana: Who is more affectionate?

Chris: This is another ‘depends on the situation’ question

Nikki: What he said

Dana: Who is more protective?

Nikki: Chris

Chris: I don’t know about that one babe, I’ve seen you go momma bear on some people…

Dana: Who reaches for the other’s hand first

Nikki: Depends on the situation. But I like holding his hand…

Chris: And I like holding hers.

Dana: You two are totally cheating in this game, by the way. Though, I’m pretty sure we all know the answer to this next tone. Who gives the silent treatment when they’re mad at the other.

Chris: Nikki

Nikki: [Laughing] Definitely me

Dana: Called it! Alright, how about this one who sneaks into the shower with the other in the morning?

Mikey: [Groans] I don’t want to hear this answer… I came back at the wrong time…

Nikki: [Laughing] I’m up with the sun and he likes to sleep in, so it’s definitely not him

Chris: You’ve snuck into the shower with me a time or two…

Nikki: That’s cause you’re hot and I can’t help myself.

Dana: Alright, well who initiates sexy times the most

Nikki: I’ve never really thought about it…

Chris: Me either…

Dana: Here’s another one that I’m pretty sure I know the answer to. Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear at inappropriate times?

Chris: I won’t even attempt to deny this one… though Nikki has said some pretty dirty things to me on red carpets…

Nikki: Only to help you relax…

Dana: I am very proud of you Nik! Alright who sings in the shower?

Nikki: That would be both of us.

Dana: Who takes the longest to get ready?

Nikki: [Snickering] Do you want to answer this one Chris?

Chris: Shut up. It’s not my fault you wake up so beautiful you don’t need to do much…

Nikki: You’re so full of it! [Laughing] But seriously, I’ve just perfect the mom has five minutes to get herself ready for the day look for my everyday life. But when it comes to getting ready for events, I do take much longer than he does… usually because it includes some sort of spa-like pampering.

Chris: It’s cause you deserve it.

Dana: Aww you guys are too cute! Speaking of events, who drags the other out to the dancer floor?

Nikki: I can usually coax him out there for a dance or two..

Chris: She is my weakness…

Dana: Alright, slight shift here to questions about being pregnant or rather when you were pregnant. Who suggested the most ridiculous names?

Chris: That would be me.

Nikki: And your friends. Chris Hemsworth suggested we name our eldest son Thor.

Dana: [Laughing] I had forgotten about that! Alright, who read the most ‘What to Expect’ books?

Chris: That would probably be me, too.

Nikki: Though it probably should have been me. But there were some nights that Chris would read it aloud to me.

Dana: Awwww!!! Gah, I want another baby…

Mikey: I think we’re done with the baby questions…

Dana: Spoil sport. [Clears throat] Alright, here are some travel themed ones. Who always gets the window seat on the planes?

Chris: Me, Nikki doesn’t like sitting by the window

Dana: Who is in charge of the radio during road trips?

Nikki: The driver

Chris: Unless his co-pilot convinces him to let her pick the music during the drive from Boston to Georgia…

Nikki: Oh hush, you loved the mix I put together and you know it.

Dana: Who over packs?

Nikki: That would be me. I overpack for myself and the kids.

Chris: And then she packs extra stuff for me, too.

Nikki: And I’ve saved his butt a couple times for doing so.

Dana: Who, without fail, accidentally leaves something important at home?

Chris: Guilty. I’m pretty sure we have a drawer full of extra phone chargers cause I always forget mine.

Dana: Who’s the most spontaneous?

Chris: Probably me, but only because Nikki can be a bit slow at making decisions

Nikki: True story.

Dana: Who is more likely to bring home a new pet

Nikki: Well we have a golden retriever named Boston that Chris found at a shelter while filming the second Captain America movie in Washington D.C.

Chris: His name was Boston! I couldn’t just leave him in D.C., it just wasn’t right! Plus, he is like the sweetest dog ever. But don’t tell Max, our other golden retriever, that, because I don’t want him to get jealous.

Nikki: Speaking of Max, he was a surprise present from Santa for our eldest son’s first Christmas

Chris: That was Mikey’s idea, because they had one puppy left from their dog’s liter

Mikey: Oh no, don’t drag me into this.

Dana: On to the next question!! Who kills the bugs?

Chris: As long as they aren’t spiders, I’ve got it.

Nikki: Though, you have started killing spiders for Rachie

Chris: That’s because she looks at me with her big blue eyes and suddenly the spiders aren’t so scary anymore because I need to protect her…

Dana: Be still my heart. [Sighs happily] Last question, who starts getting into the holidays way before they should?

Nikki: Both of us.

Chris: We never host Thanksgiving so we start decorating for Christmas the day after Halloween

Nikki: Bring on the Christmas carols

Chris: We like Christmas. We do Christmas good.

Mikey: And loud… and bright… how many lights did you have on your house last year, neighbor?

Chris: I don’t even know. But it made the kids smile and that’s all that matters.

Dana: Thank you guys so much for joining me for this podcast. It has been so much fun.

Nikki: Thank you for having us. Or rather, thanks for recording us? We do this all the time in real life.

Chris: Best of all, Mikey and I kept our potty mouths clean! That means we get beers!

Mikey: We get all the beer!

Dana: And on that lovely note, we will say goodbye for this podcast. I will be back again next week.

All Four: Night!

Want to find me off tumblr? I’m @beccatheycallme on twitter. I also post my stories on AO3 and Wattpad.

My tag list is always open, just let me know if you’d like to be added!

[evans-heaven]

Anchor~s.m.

Consider it the part 2 of “Hey, Legend,” (read here) but can be read as a standalone. This shit is 4.1k words long so its gonna be a ride, y’all :)

Heavily unedited but I hope you lovelies enjoy!

Also, more towards the end I made a pretty big jump, sorry guys 🙈

~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/N’s POV

“And lastly, I’d like to thank my beautiful wife, Y/N. Honestly, where would I be without her? She’s my world, my soulmate, the love of my life, a goddess among mankind, the literal queen of every fucking thing, she’s-”

“Darling, put it down before you break it,” Shawn sighed, smiling up at me.

My eyes darted down to his. “Shush,” I hissed, crinkling my nose. I held the award higher and turned my attention back to my imaginary audience. “Now, where was I? Ah, yes, my wife, Y/N. She is the wind beneath my wings, the muse behind my music, without her, my guitar wouldn’t strum, my soul wouldn’t pour out nearly as much passion as it does today, my-”

“Okay, that’s enough,” Shawn threw his hands up and stood up from his place on our carpeted bedroom floor. He took the award from me (mid fake speech, might I add. How rude!) and held it above his head. I looked up at it and growled. 

“Give it back! I wasn’t done!” I tried to reach for it, which, of course, backfired on me, because it somehow slipped my mind that my husband was 6′2, of course, towering over me. I threw my hands down and pouted. “The imaginary audience is waiting for me to finish my speech, Shawn,” I raised my brows and folded my arms. I was pretty sure no one interrupted him with he gave his actual speech at the VMAs. Why was he doing it to me?

“Well the imaginary audience agrees that you’re taking this way too far, and should give it up and help your husband unpack,” he said, walking over to his bedside table and placing the shiny, silver moon person on the it. He looked at it for a few seconds before licking his thumb pad and swiping it across the statuette’s tiny head. I giggled at his action as he smiled in satisfaction and walked back over to me. “Now, baby, I have weeks worth of dirty laundry that we should get started on,” he asked, taking my hands in his, pulling my back down on the floor with him, next to one of his opened suit cases. I looked inside of it and glared. Not because I didn’t want to have to deal with it, but because Shawn, like always, couldn’t be bothered to fold his garments neatly like I always told him to. It didn’t matter that they were dirty or would be confined in the suitcase, he could still make it look more presentable. Maybe it was just my OCD getting the best of me, though.

“Alright, let’s get started,” I reached over and grabbed a handful of button downs, starting to create piles of whites, darks, and colors. I was pretty sure the shirt I wore, the black one with the white trees on it, was the only button up he didn’t take with him. After all those clothing outlets sent them to him, he had grown attached and pretty much opted for those instead of the other shirts he had. I didn’t mind though, he looked amazing in them and they were much easier to remove when need be. I smirked lightly at the thought

As Shawn began to fill me in on his schedule for weeks to come, I refrained from stopping him and letting him know that I didn’t want to think about that for now. He had only just gotten home, the bags under his eyes only a small reminder of how tired he was. Jumping city to city for different promo events, tours, and finally the VMAs had taken a toll on his appearance, and I had noticed his voice was light and slightly gravelly from his tired vocal chords. I never brought up my concern, because I knew how stubborn my husband was.

“Sometimes sleep needs to be sacrificed to get that one perfect creation,” I thought to myself, remembering what he told me the first- and last- time I brought it up. “Or that one perfect moment, where you know you’ve done something right’’” he said, planting a kiss on my forehead, a universal sign between us both that I needed to drop whatever worries I had.

“Is that why the both of us are so exhausted?” Shawn asked out of nowehere.

I jumped, dropping the socks I had in my hands. “Huh?” I asked, side eyeing him.

He cocked his head. “What you just said, ‘sometimes sleep needs to be sacrificed to get that one perfect creation,’” he told me, and my eyes went wide. Had I really said that out loud?

Quickly, I made a recovery before he could notice. “Uh-um, yeah,” I gave him a nervous laugh and shoved him playfully. “Could be,” I said. “I mean, we’re both always writing, me an article and you a song. There’s always the constant struggle between us both for it to be perfect,” I sighed, and picked up a shirt, throwing it into the whites pile.

“Did you finish what you were working on during the show?” he asked me, tugging me closer until I was in his lap. He leaned back against the trunk at the foot of our bed, dragging his hand up and down my back. In that moment, my concern-for us both-vanished.

I nodded lightly, placing my head on his bare chest, AKA my second home. “Its not my best work but at least I got it done,” I said. “Michelle doesn’t want it until Tuesday so I have some time to do a little more with it,” I said while I toyed with the drawstrings on his gray sweatpants.

I was lucky enough to have an easy going boss like Michelle Tan-editor in chief of Seventeen. She gave me a day long extension on one of the featued articles for the September issue after she heard about how rough the night I was supposed to send it in was for me. And by rough night, I meant crying over my husband who was miles away and couldn’t take away the ache in my heart caused by his absence. But she didn’t need to know that. And considering I was always on time with my articles, she was willing to let it slide just this once.

It was the first and last time, thought, that I would let my lonliness get in the way of my work.

“That was understanding of her,” Shawn smiled, pressing a kiss to my temple. “Sorry you were so distracted because of me, sweetheart,” he said, and I couldnt’ tell if he was genuinely apologetic, or just being a cocky shit.

I didn’t have time to reply, because the ringing doorbell sounded from all the way downstairs. 

I furrowed my brow and stood up, Shawn doing the same, heading for the bedroom door. “Who’s that?” I asked, looking at the time on the clock that hung over the door frame as I followed Shawn out. It was well 12:30 on the dot. I didn’t know of anyone we were expecting, no family or friends.

“I noticed time got away from us and we didn’t get a chance to go to the store to get stuff for dinner,” Shawn answered, making a 360 before he descended the stairs as the bell rang again. “So I ordered some Domino’s,” he smirked over his shoulder as he opened the door, pulling out a $20 from his pocket.

I stood at the top of the staircase, smiling. It was the little things he never forgot about me that always made my heart jump-as cliche as it sounded. I was always in the mood for Domino’s, no matter what time of day it was. And he always pulled through and ordered it for me, because he just knew me so well. He was the man I married, after all.

“Thanks, man,” Shawn jutted his chin out to the pizza guy, box in his hand as he closed the door. Giving me a warm once over, he made his way to the kitchen.

“Sausage and cheese?” I asked him, loud enough so he could hear as I made my way down the stairs.

��You already know, babe!” he confirmed. I entered the kitchen just as he was taking out two plates for us.

“Did I just collect our pizza shirtless?” Shawn asked after being silent for a few moments while I grabbed two bottles of Smirnoff from the fridge.

“Yeah, you did,” I laughed, realizing along with him. “Did the pizza look like he was getting any ideas?” I joked, setting the bottles down on the island in the center of the kitchen. 

Shawn got a mischievous look in his eyes, and he darted over to me, hooking his hands under my knees and lifting me onto the island. I shrieked-and quickly transitioned into a moan- as his lips begun to suck on my jawline without warning.

“No,” he husked in between his assault. “But I have some ideas of my own,” he said into my air, the tone of his voice, low, combined with the slight rasp, sending a chill down my spine that almost made me snap in two. He took the shell of my ear in between his incisors and tugged on it lightly, then got a bit more harsh as I sucked in a sharp breath and pulled him closer to me by his broad shoulders.

He took my hips in his large hands and lifted me a bit further onto the counter, his lips finally meeting mine. It was a mixture of a slow and passionate, yet hungry and possesive kiss that would surely leave my lips red, swollen, and sure of who they belonged to. His plump lips moved rapidly against mine, our tongues fighting a battle of their own as they tangled within each other. 

He moved his hands from their exploration of my lower body to my head, threading his fingers through my hair. I moaned out loud, removing my lips from his, though he remained pulling on my tongue for a few seconds more before he attatched his lips to my neck.

“God, I’ve missed your body,” he mumbled into my divit as he began to unbutton my shirt (his shirt), pulling it apart and lightly pushing me down until I laid flat on the tiled surface.

He trailed wet, sloppy kisses down my stomach, holding on to the cups of my bra as he palmed the amply flesh concealed by them. He reached the waisband of my panties, and as much as I didn’t want to, I stopped him.

“Woah, woah,” I said, sitting up right, forcing him to stand up straight. He almost glared at me but it turned into a concerned glance.

“Baby, why move so fast?” I asked him, placing my hands on his chest as his forehead met mine, his messy curls tickling my brow. “ We’ve got all week before you leave again, and the pizza is gonna get cold,” I laughed.

“Right, you know I was too focused on my boner to remember it got delivered,” he chuckled, taking me down from the counter and walking over to the other side to add slices to our plates.

“Hey, pizza for dinner, each other for dessert,” I teased in a sing song voice, squeezing his ass playfully as he made his way out the doorway to the dining room table.

“Y/N, don’t tempt me to drop these plates and rail you against that wall,” his voice wasn’t lighthearted and he didn’t even look at me, but I still smiled. Even in his serious moments he was still a large softie to me.

I rolled my eyes and grabbed the bottles of Smirnoff and the rest of the pizza, following him to the large table suited for an entire family- one we hadn’t created yet. 

“Hailee wanted me to tell you you did a great job on her article for last month’s issue,” Shawn said once we began eating. “She would have called but things have been so hectic for her, and she knew it was the same for you,”

“Damn right,” I scoffed, but smiled still. “She’s the sweetest, God knows I love writing about her,” 

Hailee was by far the one I was closest to among Shawn’s group of famous friends. We had met a few years back at Jingle Bash and immediately hit it off. Since I had been working for Seventeen, she had been on the cover twice and had been in features a dozen times. I was always the one to interview her-due to her request, and I would never complain.

“God knows you love her period,” Shawn laughed, setting his slice down to take a sip of his drink. “I swear you two are gonna hook up and you’re leave me in the shadows one day,” he joked.

I cocked a brow. “Careful you speak that into existance, Mendes,” I played along with him.  “So what are our plans for the following week? I could ask Michelle for a few days away from the office so I can work from home for us to have more time together,” I said, biting into my slice of pizza I had barely touched.

He shrugged. “Whatever we can think of, darling. This whole week is all about you,” he held my tiny hand in his gigantic one, kissing the back of it sweetly.

I nodded, suddenly not as smiley as I had been seconds before. 

“You okay?” he asked, noticing my changed stance. He tucked his index finger under my chin and lifted my head a bit higher so I could meet his gaze. His honey colored eyes held flecks of green, and concern. His thumb grazed over my bottom lip lightly.

I recovered quickly.“Yeah, fine, just thinking about how much I’ve missed you,” And how much I’d miss him when he left again in a week.

He grinned. “Think nothing of it, baby. I’m here now,” he pulled me closer to him and pecked my lips before returning to his pizza. 

I nodded again, swallowing the built up lump in my throat. Then why do I feel so distant from you?

We ate mostly in silence until the pizza was done and there was only crust left. The only words said were from him, complimenting the pizza, and me, giving a small chirp of agreement. My mood had fallen progssively as it got later, and it frustrated me that I couldn’t put it aside to be there for my husband. Luckily, his excitement to finally be able to sit and have a meal with me distracted him. I knew he didn’t need the extra weight of my problems, anyway.

Shawn’s POV, later that night

When I stretched my arm over to the other side of the bed in my sleep, I was met with only the feeling of empty sheets. And that was enough to wake me.

I rose slowly, fist rubbing over my right eye as I turned my head to face Y/N’s side of the bed, which was empty. I looked at her alarm clock- it was 4:22 in the morning. She never got out of bed during the night unless it was to use the toilet, and the opened bathroom door showed she wasn’t in there. I was always so used to having her right next to me when I wanted to snuggle, but for whatever reason, she was absent.

“Y/N! Babe?” I called out to her as I stumbled out of bed, trying not to let my concern show through my voice.

I had noticed her fallen face and monotone voice (when she bothered to speak) during and after dinner, and she had seemed all too eager to turn away from me in bed after she said goodnight. It was way different from when we met at that airport, and the impact of her koala hug made me drop my bags and nearly stumble back. I whispered words of comfort in her ear while stroking her back as she lamented how much she had missed me, words choppy from her tears and kisses all over my cheek, forehead and neck. My heart sank a bit when I thought of what could have changed over the course of the day.

As her husband, so many things mattered to me when it came to her. Above all, I wanted her to be happy. And she just didn’t seem to be, even if it was the smallest signs pointing to that, I still knew.

As I was about to call her out again, nearing the door to our bedroom to investigate the rest of the house, a small sniffle came from behind me, followed by a chocked sob. I spun on my heel, eyes in line with the doors to our balcony next to the bed, a few feet away. More broken whimpers came from that general area, getting louder as I neared.

“Y/N are you-” I was cut off by the site of my girl, curled up in the corner of the balcony, face buried in her thighs as her body shivered with her crying.

Protective mode came on inside me at full force as I rushed over to her, scopping her up in my arms and sitting down on one of the padded tweed chairs. I didn’t know why she was crying, just knew that I had to hold her.

“Shh, baby, you’re okay, you’re fine,” I said, but I mentally slapped myself, because it was evident she was neither one of those things. I shut up and just continued to hold her,rocking her in my arms as she quietly sobbed into me. I almost felt myself begin to cry as well, because her pain was my pain, but I just had to be there for her and comfort her in that moment. I had to remain strong for whatever reason had her in this state. 

“I’m here, baby, I’m right here,” I told her. It was all I could think to say. Just let her know I wasn’t going anywhere.

“I’m sorry,” she managed out a few moments later, moving her headfrom its place in the crook of my neck, wiping her eyes dry, but to no ail. Tears spilled over again, but she was silent as she looked me in the eyes, blinking to keep her emotions at bay.

“No, you don’t have to apologize to me, darling. But please, tell me what’s wrong. I don’t know how long you’ve been out here but I need to know why,” I said, running my fingers through her matted hair, bringing my thumb over to her cheek, using the pad to rid her blotchy skin of the moisture from her tears.

As though what I said triggered something inside her, she got up from my lap, throwing my arms off of her as she paced in front of me, shaking her head. I stood up too, but didn’t touch her. Something told me she had gotten enough physical contact and just needed to vent, but she couldn’t find the words.

“Why?” she whispered. “There are so many reasons why I’m like this, right now, in front of you. I don’t have a single idea how to even begin to explain how I feel, Shawn,” she said, her tone helpless and frustrated. She was turned away from me, arms wrapped around herself as she fisted my Eddie Vedder t shirt in her hands. I watched her. She lifted her shoulders as she sighed and dropped her hands, eventually turning to face me. Her puffy, red eyes held no emotion but pain and sadness as she looked to me. Still, I said nothing and only watched her, letting her have the floor. She needed her husband who listened, not her husband who held her when she was sad and acted like that was enough.

“Everything is wrong. And it doesn’t seem like it, which makes it even more wrong. Because everyone brushes off what problems I might have because of how perfect my life seems. Perfect job. Perfect home. Perfect husband. And you know what? Too often, do I tell myself those exact things when it gets too hard for me. I surpress my own feelings because I let myself think I have no reason to be sad, or depressed, or lonely,” she let out another shaky sigh, and I sensed tears coming, in the both of us.

“Work is hard. It gets stressful and overwhelming and sometimes I just want to quit. And you know what makes it worse? Not having a husband to come home to when I’ve had a rough day. And that makes the following days even more rough, because I’m so filled with fear of of overbearing everything might be at work that it makes me think even more of you, not here when I really, really need you,”

My heart skipped a beat, and a small shock flowed through my body. Was that really how she felt?

“Baby, don’t get me wrong,“ she said quickly, coming over to me and taking my hands. “I know we talked about this when we started dating and I’ve accepted that you won’t always be here, but right now, at this time in my life, it seems that all I need is you. My anchor. You’re my anchor, Shawn,” she said.

I looked down at her, speechless, not sure if she was done or not. And if she was, I didn’t know what to say.

But the silence was filled by her, bursting into tears as she crashed into my chest, lightly beating it with her fists. She sobbed without a care. My arms wrapped tightly around her as I felt tears stream down my face as well, my pain not measuring up to hers, but still there, and I would make it known.

“I-It’s so hard Sh-Shawn,” she said quietly, the wetness of her tears streaming down my stomach as they fell from her eyes.

“Oh, baby,” I kissed the crown of her head as she continued to let out what was left in her. “I know, it hurts,I know,” 

“I j-just want it to st-top,” she whimpered, her tears slowing but not ceasing. “I need you, I need you here,”

“Hey, look at me,” I ordered softly, holding her face in my hands as her eyes met mine yet again. Trying not to let the agony and anxiety that swam in her once lively y/e/c orbs get to me, I dragged my thumbs across her cheeks and under her eyes as I placed a kiss on her swollen, wet lips. I swallowed her light moan before I pulled away.

“Whenever I’m away from you, I know things can be hard. They’re hard on me too. I know we both know how hard it is to fall asleep without each other to hold. Without you being there to encourage me when I’m a fucking wreck and don’t know where the hell I’m going with something. But you know what? The mere thought that in a few days I’m gonna be home to you, that’s enough to keep me grounded. Its always enough. And I want it it to be enough for you too, baby,” I told her.

“I will always come home to you, Y/N. Always. I’ll never stray or go somewhere else unless I have to. Not when I know you’re here waiting for me to come home to you. I need you and you need me and I’ll be fucked if I or anyone else ever came in the way of that. Right now, with you in my arms, I keep this feeling in my head when I’m away and that keeps the anticipation to see you rising higher. Remember the way you feel when I hold you, angel. When you need me I’m a call away, a face time away, or a flight away. You’re never alone once you remember you can always come to me no matter how you feel or where I am,” I finished, and I could do nothing more but just look to her, waiting for her.

She tugged her lips into her mouth, releasing the tension from her shoulders as I felt her entire body soften in my arms. Her eyes, still glossy, still pained in the tiniest way, slowly began to regain the same glimmer that was there earlier in the day, the same glimmer I fell in love with-lively, full of hope and excitement and love.

“My anchor, even when you’re not here,”she said, after being silent all through out my speech. 

All I could do was smile down at her. And it became clear to me that I wasn’t just her anchor, she was mine. She kept me grounded when my life in the industry’s fast lane became a hellfire. When I felt like quitting and giving up as to not deal with constant judgement and scrutiny on my craft, she was there for me like no one else. And that was what any relationship was all about. Your partner relied on you for so many things, but one of the most important was a shoulder to cry on or someone to listen. I didn’t know what I would do without Y/N when it came to those things.

“You know it, darling,” I kissed her forehead, pulling her head back into my chest as we swayed in the light breeze that the wee hours of the morning delivered. “Everything is gonna be okay, if I can’t promise you anything else, I can always promise you that,”

I had no more words left. But I had a feeling that was okay. It was time for me to just hold her, no words in between us. Sometimes the warmth of a loved one’s embrace was the best remedy for an aching heart.

Maybe in that moment she wasn’t totally rid of her worries and lamentations, but we were on the road to recovery. And I would be with her, every step of the way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I feel like this sucked and it ended really abruptly, but that’s only because I was kinda in a rush to put this up. Hope you lovely babes enjoyed! Feedback is always welcome :) Gentle reminder to reblog it if you like it!

[thevictoryofthepeople]

HELLO! TODAY MARKS MY SIX-YEAR ANNIVERSARY ON THIS BLOG ( 6/1/2018 ) AND TO CELEBRATE HERE IS A FOLLOW FOREVER ( I haven't done this in a while so excuse the lame graphic ). I honestly cannot believe that I've had this blog for so long. I've had a lot of downs here but I've also had my fair share of ups. After my year hiatus, I had honestly thought I would be shutting this blog down for good because a lot of things were going wrong but I'm so glad I didn't because I got to meet more amazing people along with the partners who've managed to stick by my side for so long. Besides having a follow forever, I wanted to do something special but I'm honestly clueless so I was hoping you all could help me out. I was thinking a Q & A video for the muses and mun, a voice recording of what my muses would sound like in a drabble, a promo/shoutout, a gifset/graphic/photo edit of your muses and mine, and/or drabbles for your muses and mine. You guys can choose which one you want me to do but I will be closing requests by June 8. Anyways, below the cut are people I just want to thank and people who I wish to interact with. I may have forgotten some people so I do apologize. I'm very scatterbrained at times. Okay love you all. Stay wonderful. ~ local smol bean, MC <3

OLDIES BUT GOODIES ( MY WONDERFUL LOVES WHO HAVE BEEN HERE FOR SO LONG )

@qceensofkings - Such a kind person with great muses.We don’t talk much out of character but it doesn’t stop me from loving Nicholas and Isabelle together. They make my heart happy especially during their little cute moments ( like fighting over if pancakes or waffles are better ). You are a wonderful human being and I love seeing you on my dash always. I can’t wait to keep writing more with you

my starlight bestie { @eternallydreamingstar } - BEST FRIEND HI. OKAY SO FIRST OFF I LOVE YOU OKAY YOU’RE SUCH A GREAT FRIEND! MORE THAN I CAN EVER ASK FOR. You were literally the first person after my hiatus who reached out to me again and started to write with me. You gave me the push and motivation to keep on going despite me wanting to give up. I love our plots, I love our characters, and I love the world we’ve created. We’ve been together for so long and I honestly cannot stress how much you mean to me. I love you so much. You’ve have always been there for me and I will continue to always be there for you too. I LOVE YOU STARLIGHT

the longest love { @drew-a-tanaka } - Okay....listen....I think by this point this is going to be repetitive because you’re literally my longest partner ( it’s been like five years ) so you’ve been with me for such a long time and you’ve heard me tell you I love you all the time. I love you okay. I care so much about you more than you could ever know. Thank you for truly caring for me and for helping me. Thank you for writing with me. Thank you for pulling me out of the darkness countless of times. Thank you for cheering me on. Thank you. I love you and I’m always here for you. I will always be here for you. 

the wonderful inspiration { @ribbedxgloves } - Um listen, even after all these years I’m still intimidated by you. Like you’re so amazing and all your characters are great and don’t even get me started on your writing. I will never cease to thank you for giving me a chance because without you I don’t think I would have actually grown and improved as a roleplayer. Thank you for being such a wonderful human being. I miss talking to you a lot. But thank you for being a beautiful soul.

SUGAR AND SPICE AND EVERYTHING NICE ( MY DARLING CUTIES WHO ALWAYS MANAGE TO MAKE MY DAY BRIGHTER )

@hadesrebelofadaughter - You honestly are one of the kindest people ever. I don’t think you understand just how much you’ve made my days when you sent me all those encouraging messages and were genuinely interested in my characters. I apologize for my slowness because we don’t get to interact a lot but I do read your threads and you’re such a wonderful writer. You are a bright person so please keep on shining. 

@district-one-beauty - Hello, my love. First off, I want to apologize for being the slowest person ever when it comes to replying. Second off, thank you for always messaging me and trying to talk to me. You’re such a kind person. I know things get rough but I’m always here if you need anything. Thank you for blessing my dash and threads with your presence. And thank you for simply being my amazing rp partner. I will do my best to be more responsive, I promise. 

@humansxfox - Okay first off, I actually never thought you would actually want to roleplay with me because I am a mere potato who knows nothing and yet you sent me asks and now here we are. Katherine makes me super happy because I love how she just interacts with Nicholas. It gives me a chance to be more creative with him without having to change his backstory or who he is ( this means a lot to me honestly ). You’re honestly such a blessing on my dash and just your presence makes me happy. I wish we could talk more out of character but I’m really shy and weird so I do apologize.

pink candied sky { @leenxna​ } - MY LOVE MY WONDERFUL HONEY MY DARLING! DUDE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH OKAY. LIKE I TRULY LOVE YOU. YOU’RE SO FUCKING AMAZING I CAN’T EVEN EXPRESS HOW MUCH YOU MEAN TO ME. Thank you for putting up with me and thank you for talking to me and just being an overall great person. I love being a dork with you and just talking about everything. You make me so happy. I love that we’ve pretty much established a whole story and it’s pretty great. Thanks for introducing me to great people and thanks for loving my spams. I can honestly write a whole chapter about how amazing you are but I’ll stop for now haha. Okay LOVE YOU. 

@hxpxfm - YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL PERSON. Like the first time you hopped into my IM, not going to lie, I was really startled because no one has ever truly done that before but DUDE I’M REALLY GLAD YOU DID. You’re so sweet and caring and I just love having conversations with you. I know we haven’t roleplayed yet [ I’M SORRY I’M SO SLOW ] but I’m already excited for our characters to interact. THANK YOU FOR BEING SUCH A BALL OF SUNSHINE. 

@killyouhimself - Your presence on my dash makes me so happy. And even though our threads have not progressed yet ( I’M SORRY I’M SO SLOW. Please forgive me. ) I honestly already love them. I love your character so much which is why I’m always reading your threads. You’re an amazing writer and your creativity is truly astounding. I love the interaction between Charon and Sungmin. Thank you for being on my dash and for being such a blessing. 

the argentate heart { @atrociity​ } - OMG SO MANY THINGS TO SAY ABOUT YOU. You make me so soft, okay? Like you’re so cute and adorable and so nice and caring and it’s just like how was I blessed ??? I love Eris so much and the way she interacts with Mak ( also thank you for interacting with him ). Thank you for checking up on me. Honestly if anyone ever fights you, tell me. I will fight them for you. I will literally lay down my morality for you because you are a person who deserves all the love and protection. I love you so much! 

the sweetest honey { @busanbunnie​ } - ANOTHER PEACH. ANOTHER SWEETHEART WHO HAS MANAGED TO MAKE MY DAYS BETTER. YOU ARE SO ADORABLE AND CUTE AND I LOVE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU - FROM YOUR BLOG AND TO YOUR PERSONALITY. I love our interactions so so much and I just love talking to you. Thank you for being such a bright light. 

@painterlyjongin - HIIIII. Okay listen, I’m actually very intimidated by you and I’m really grateful that you’re writing with me. I love plotting and talking with you always. Your characters are beautiful and you’re a wonderful human being. Every time you appear on my dash, I get very happy. Thank you for giving me the honor of interacting with you.

@beavtiful-liar​​ - I’m always blessed to see you on my dash. I’m always happy when you’re online. I know we don’t interact as much but I’m still grateful that your presence is here. I’m always happy when I read your threads. You’re such a kind person and you deserve so much love and happiness. I don’t know how you managed to keep so many muses and how you manage to be super creative but it’s honestly awe-inspiring. Thank you for being a blessing. 

@nobxdyshome​​ - You are such a beautiful soul and I’m really sorry that I’m very slow with replying but with the interactions we’ve had so far, it’s honestly great. I loved plotting with you and talking with you. I always read your threads and you’re so creative and such a great writer. I will always be in awe of you.

@jinxednature - Hiiiii. First off, you are so so so so so so nice. A very, very sweet soul that I have the honor of talking and interacting with you. You are so beautiful and kind and I love your blog and your characters and your creativity. You give my dash a little more sweetness and I will forever be grateful for that. 

the bby love { @aroixs } - Will words be enough to convey how much you mean to me? Will it ever truly encompass all my emotions and thoughts? You, my dear, are such a true blessing in my life. You genuinely are such a caring and wonderful person and every time I see a notification from you I honestly get incredibly happy. You care so much and you’re always so kind and thoughtful. Even when you have your own problems to deal with, you manage to have time for me and that is an honor. I love you so much bby. I’m always grateful for you.

my baby doll wife { @moonsiim​ } - There are too many things to say about you. I can write a whole novel trying to detail out all of the thoughts I have about you but I won’t go overboard. One day I will but not today. I always tell you this: I love you. Every time we talk I always have a smile on my face. Every time you send me something or talk about something you’re passionate or interested about my heart swells with joy because I’m honored that you can share it with me. Your writing leaves me breathless. Your characters leave me gasping for oxygen. You, just you, leaves me in awe. I love you so much and I don’t know how to convey that truly because let’s face it I’m pretty awkward and weird and yet you’ve given me a chance to be part of your life. I will always be grateful for everything you’ve done. I will always be here for anything you need. I will always try to be your ball of sunshine. I truly love you so so much. 

ADMIRATION FROM AFAR ( AMAZING BLOGS I WISH I GOT TO INTERACT WITH MORE OR HAVE A CHANCE TO INTERACT WITH BUT I'M TOO SHY AND AWKWARD AND SLOW ...and just a little busy which sucks but one day )

@meirise || @dcpression || @xtaem || @prvttyliars || @elvctrickiss || @sierrcr || @monkeydjong || @boyccld || @divinexlovers || @kingpvns || @nxcturnes ( quick note - I’m honestly in admiration of your writing and you very much intimidate me but I enjoy reading all your threads ) || @lostavra || @strawbxrryblxssxms ( quick note - YOU’RE HONESTLY SUCH A SWEETHEART AND I’M SORRY I HAVEN’T REPLIED YET ) || @seaxofxstrangers || @malvdo || @deitius || @whyhasthemadnessoccured || @130mo2d || @witch-saebyeok ( quick note - I’m sorry for being slow and ALSO I LOVE WINTER’S AND SAEBYEOK’S FRIENDSHIP ALREADY ) || @fatedtobehunted || @survivics ( quick note - I always try to send you an ask or a request to plot and then I get really scared so I don’t but I really wish I could interact with you ) || @ilatiisms ( quick note - I love your character so much and you’re such an amazing writer and I’m very intimidated but one day I will muster up the courage to ask to interact ) || @nocturncx ( quick note - I miss you and I love our interactions and I’m so sorry that I’m really slow with replying. You’re beautiful ) || @telekineticdivinity || @tenxthreex || @orientalskies || @alnowicki || @curious-x || @fclklre || @rousepalette 

[greysfanpage388]

Elevator Hug part 3 ( repost)

As requested by @ameliashepherdgoeshunting :)

Parts 1 and 2 can be found here:

Part 1 :

http://greysfanpage388.tumblr.com/post/172963018076/elevator-hug-repost

Part 2 :

http://greysfanpage388.tumblr.com/post/172963240926/elevator-hug-part-2-repost

Hey guys, this is a continuation of ‘Elevator Hug parts 1 and 2, but this can also be read separately as a oneshot. Enjoy! ;)

 This is based on on the promo and synopsis of 13x23, about Owen receiving some life changing news and Amelia being there to support him. This is also based on a prompt I received, with some modifications made.

Prompt : You're an amazing writer! Do you think you'd be interested in writing a fanfic based off the synopsis for ep 13x23 where "Amelia supports Owen." She hears from another doctor that some bodies were found(including Megan's) and has a bad feeling & runs thru the hospital and eventually finds Owen in an on call room and she holds and talks to him?

P.s  I know in the show and based on the promo Amelia hasn’t returned back home and Owen would go to Meredith’s to probably meet her. But for the sake of my ‘Elevator Hug’ series- Amelia is already back home in this fic. However the main point remains- it’s Amelia’s time to support Owen :)

P.p.s  In this fic, Amelia finds Owen at home, not in an on call room

p.p.p.s  New note: I know on the show Megan didn’t die. This was written before we found out that Megan was still alive :p

It had been a very busy day so far for Owen Hunt. There was an influx of patients in the ER due to a huge pile up involving a bus, a van and several cars. He and April Kepner had been kept occupied.

It didn’t dampen his spirits though. It had been 2 weeks since his wife, Amelia Shepherd had returned home, and almost 2 weeks since he had the first glimpse of their baby. All was well in the world again.

He was humming to himself, discharging a patient who was under observation for a syncopal attack when he heard his name being called.

‘ Hunt.’ April approached him. ‘ I’m attending to the patient in bed 6 who has upper GI bleed. Can you attend to the patient in bed 3 who was just brought in? The paramedics said that she was in a car accident and suffered head trauma.’

‘ Ok,’ Owen answered. ‘ I’m just about done discharging this patient.’

As he walked towards bed 3- he stopped in his tracks. It couldn’t be her. He knew his mind was playing tricks on him, but from a far this patient looked rather similar to him. The red wavy hair, the slim body.

As he approached the patient, his heart sank. So much for getting his hopes up. Of course it wasn’t Megan. It was just another patient who looked like her. Today he had been thinking about Megan a lot.

‘ Hello. I’m Dr. Hunt. May I know your name?’ he asked the patient, who seemed fine at a glance, except for the laceration wound on her forehead.

‘ Michelle.’ she answered. ‘ My head hurts.’

‘ I was driving when another car switched lanes right in front of us without signalling . I couldn’t manage to brake and we collided with the car. I’m fine, but she hit her head.’  a red haired man sitting next to her explained. ‘ I’m Michael, by the way. I’m her brother. We were on the way to our parents’ place for dinner.’

‘ Do your parents know that you’re here?’ Owen asked.

‘ Yes, they’re coming over in a short while.’ Michael answered.

‘ Alright, Michelle, can you look right at me? I need to check your pupils .’ said Owen as she obeyed.

‘ Do you have any dizziness, vomitting or blurring of vision?’ Owen asked once he ascertained that her pupils were equal and reactive.

‘ No.’ Michelle shook her head.

‘ She’ll be ok right?’ Michael asked, concerned. ‘ She’s my only sister- I don’t want anything to happen to her.’

She’s my only sister. I don’t want anything to happen to her.

Owen found his mind drifting again to his only sister, Megan.

He shook the thought of Megan off his mind as he answered, ‘ Yes, she seems fine at the moment. But I want to page Neuro to do a full examination on you just to be sure. And I’m gonna stitch this wound on your forehead ok?’

He began working on Michelle’s wound as he ordered a nurse to page Amelia.

 _____________________________________________________________

‘ You ok?’ Amelia asked as she approached Owen at the nurses’ station half an hour later. She had done a thorough examination on Michelle and reviewed Michelle’s Brain CT which turned out normal. Being cleared by Neuro, Michelle would be discharged after another 6 hours of observation in the ER.

Owen had a distant look on his face, and she knew that something was preoccupying his mind.

‘ Huh? Yeah I’m fine.’ Owen answered distractedly.

‘ Owen….’

‘ I said I’m fine!’ he repeated, louder than he intended to.

However Amelia didn’t flinch this time. No- Owen had always supported her all this while,   she wanted to be the one to offer him support this time.

‘ You can always talk to me you know.’ Amelia said softly as she rubbed his arm soothingly. ‘ You have always supported me, and now I’m here to support you as well.’

Owen nodded as he looked at Amelia. He appreciated her support, he really did. But this wasn’t the time to be talking to her about it.

‘ Thank you, Amelia, I really appreciate it.’ he said earnestly. ‘ But I’m rather busy now. I’ll talk to you about it later ok?’

‘ Ok.’ she nodded. ‘ Just know that you can tell me anything.’ she offered, as she patted his shoulder before she left.

________________________________________________________________

It was quiet in the house as Owen sat on the couch of their living room that night. He could hear the sound of crickets and the occasional car driving by.  Amelia was on call- so he sat alone on the couch, just like he always did during the 3 months before her return.

He was exhausted after an entire day of attending to motor vehicle accident victims. Now all he wanted was to sit back and relax with a drink.

He poured himself a glass of Scotch as he leaned back on the couch. He savored the feel of the drink going down his throat.

The truth be told, he had been drinking every night since Amelia left with a simple note. Without Amelia around , there was no reason for him to stop drinking. If before, he always tried not to drink in front of her, now he binge drank. He drank to drown all the sorrows he felt deep down inside. He drank to fill the hole in his heart and the loneliness and emptiness he felt. He missed her laughter, her dimpled smile, the vanilla scent of her hair. He even missed their petty squabbles over the remote and the dishes.

Now that Amelia was back home, he had another reason to drown his sorrows with a drink today.

Although he didn’t want to admit it, he really missed his sister Megan.

Today was supposed to be Megan’s 35th birthday had she still been around. He stood up from the couch and walked over to the collection of old photo albums he and Amelia kept in one of the drawers below the TV.

He took out one of the photo albums and sat back down on the couch, flipping through the album. It contained photos of him and Megan from birth to adulthood. There were many photos of them both as babies, then as children, and subsequently as teenagers and young adults. He stared at a photo of him and Megan building sandcastles together at the beach. Their parents would make it a point to bring them to the beach every summer for vacation, and it was something they looked forward to the entire year. Then there were photos of him and Megan smiling widely during her 2nd birthday party, cakes smeared all over their faces. Another page of the album contained photos of them during their teenage years- him dressed smartly in a suit, going to prom with a girl whose name he had forgotten, and her looking so beautiful in a red dress during her prom day, being escorted by a boy who Owen disliked. Owen had always shown an interest in Megan’s love life, much to her dismay. But the actual fact was, and they both knew it- he had her best interest in mind and just wanted to protect his little sister from getting hurt. As he turned to the last page of the album, a photo caught his eye. It was the last photo they had taken together, right before they were both posted to Iraq. They were both wearing similar army uniforms and smiling widely at the camera. Both Hunt siblings shared a similar passion for serving in the army.

He let his mind drift off again to Megan. He missed her so much. He missed her cheeky smile, her cheerful laughter, he missed the way she loved to tease and provoke him to make him mad. But he could never stay mad at her for long. He missed their happy childhood memories, cycling to the park and chasing around the neighbourhood with the neighbours’ kids. He missed her interrogating him on every girl he brought home during his teenage years. Later as she grew older, he would do the same to her, scaring away every boy she brought home. He missed her provoking him by calling him sausage fingers while he operated on a patient in the battlefield.

He could recall the last conversation he had with her. She had been upset about Riggs cheating on her, but still managed to squeeze in a word of wisdom for him.

‘ Owen, I hope you find someone who would be your soulmate and companion for life. I hope you can build a happy family and future with her. Because you deserve it.’ she had said as she hugged him tight before getting on the helicopter.

‘ Oh Megan - if only you got to meet Amelia.’ he thought to himself. He was sure they would both get along great.

He took another sip of his Scotch as he wondered where she was now. Was she in hiding somewhere? Was she kidnapped and being held captive by the enemies all these years? If so, were they torturing her? Or…was she….he couldn’t bring himself to think of the word ‘dead.’

But if she was dead, wouldn’t they have found her body? He didn’t know. No one knew.

There was a knock at his front door.

Owen frowned, puzzled. Who could be visiting him and Amelia at this hour? Was it Meredith, Maggie or one of their colleagues?

He opened the door to come face to face with a buff man dressed in an army uniform.

‘ Hello, is this Dr. Owen Hunt?’ he asked.

‘ Yes, it’s me.’ Owen answered, feeling a sense of trepidation. Surely this isn’t good news, he could feel it.

‘ I’m Major William Allen.’ the man introduced himself in a booming voice as he stiffly shook hands with Owen.

‘ Are you the elder brother of Dr. Megan Hunt?’ he asked.

‘ Yes.’ Owen answered in a small voice as he could feel his heart sinking. He had a very bad feeling about this- and he didn’t want to hear what was coming next.

‘ I’m so sorry to inform you that we have found your sister’s body today. The helicopter she was on was shot down in Iraq several years ago, but due to it being hostile territory, we could only manage to recover it now.’

At the Major’s words- Owen’s entire world collapsed. Even though he had tried to prepare himself for this possibility, now that her death was confirmed, he wasn’t prepared for this moment. He had always clung on to the small possibility that she might be still alive and might return to him someday. And now- that hope was crushed just like that.

Owen remained silent as he stood there in a daze, a shocked and devastated expression on his face. He could barely register the Major’s subsequent words.

‘ Her body was badly decomposed and beyond identification- we had to perform DNA testing.’ Major William added. ‘ We guess the body had been there for a long time- probably many years. It was found near the helicopter wreckage, which leads us to believe that she might have died from the crash itself - if that’s any consolation.’

‘ If that’s any consolation.’

He wondered how could anything give him consolation upon receiving this devastating news about the confirmation of his sister’s death. Maybe, the Major meant well. He understood, it would have been better for Megan to die from the crash itself than to die from being kept a Prisoner of War after all these years. He could never bring himself to imagine Megan having to go through all the torture had she still been alive. But still, the Major’s words pierced through his heart like a double edged sword. His little sister, his only sister was gone. She was never coming back. He would never see her smile, hear her laughter or be provoked by her anymore.

‘ We’ll help you to make her funeral arrangements.’ the Major added in a serious tone.

Owen thanked the Major solemnly as he shook hands with him and closed the door behind him.

_____________________________________________________________

As soon as the front door was closed and locked, Owen sat on the couch with his head in his hands, silently mourning for his sister.

He wondered how the last minutes of her life were, and whether she died a slow, painless death. Did she think of him? Or of Riggs?

He lifted his head up from his hands and stared at the photo album full of photos and him and Megan, still placed on the couch. Now all that’s left of her were just memories.

He knew that the first stage of grief was denial. Which was exactly what he felt at the moment. Maybe, just maybe he was dreaming and it was all just a nightmare. Maybe if he pinched himself, he would wake up from this nightmare, and Megan would appear to him alive and well the next day. Maybe he was just hallucinating, the Major was just a visual hallucination and the Major’s words were just an auditory hallucination.

He progressed on quickly to the next stage of grief - anger. As if on reflex- his wrist slammed against the coffee table, knocking down his half empty glass of Scotch. Scotch spilled on the coffee table, but he didn’t care. He was angry at the universe, angry at the God above for taking away his beloved sister from him. He was angry he didn’t get a chance to say a final goodbye to her, angry at himself for letting her go on the helicopter in the first place. If only he had stopped her from getting on the helicopter- she would still be alive.

He threw the photo album across the living room and plunked back down on the couch, burying his head in his hands again, wrecked in silent sobs.

________________________________________________________________

He didn’t know how long he sat in that position. It might have been just minutes, or hours. Time seemed to stand still for him.

He jumped as he felt a warm comforting hand on his shoulder.

He looked up to see Amelia looking sympathetically at him.

‘ I heard.’ she whispered, as she rubbed his arm soothingly. ‘ I rushed back right after April told me. ‘I’m so sorry, Owen.’ she added in a soft voice.

She had just finished reviewing a patient in the ER when she overhead April and a few residents talking about an army helicopter wreckage being discovered after so many years and several bodies being found. As she approached the group to learn more details, one name stood out for her, Megan Hunt. Upon hearing the name, she immediately rushed back home, asking April to page her if there were any incoming patients that needed Neuro consults. She knew that Owen needed her at that moment.

Owen looked up at her as their eyes met. His eyes were forlorn and filled with sadness, while hers were filled with sympathy and love.

He shook his head wordlessly, at loss of words to say to her. How could he tell her how receiving the news of a sibling’s death felt like?

She pulled his body closer to her chest and hugged him tight as he finally broke down in her arms. The warmth of her touch and the feel of her heart beating broke down his defenses. He sobbed and sobbed, mourning for his sister. She rubbed his back soothingly in circular motions, knowing that the gesture would calm him down. She knew because he always performed the same gesture on her to calm her down, and now it was time for her to reciprocate.

‘ It’s ok Owen.’ she whispered as she continued rubbing his back in soothing circles. ‘ Just cry, let it all out. I know you miss her. I’m here for you.’

Amelia’s comforting voice only made him sob harder in her arms. He sobbed, letting out all the emotions he had kept buried inside for so long. He had never told anyone else besides Amelia about Megan. He couldn’t possibly talk to Riggs about her- it would be too awkward. He never told anyone this, but he would often dream of her being shot in the battlefield and would wake up screaming and sweaty. Only Amelia and Cristina knew about his condition. He had been to the psychiatrist and was diagnosed with PTSD. However, there was little that the psychiatrist could do to treat it. When Amelia left for a few months- those few months when he would wake up alone, screaming after having a nightmare were the loneliest months of his life.

‘ I know- you didn’t manage to say goodbye to her.’ she said softly, as she rubbed his arm. ‘ I didn’t manage to say goodbye to Derek as well. I miss him so much too.’

Owen finally looked up at Amelia, as the realization dawned upon him that they both had something in common, they had both lost a sibling.

‘ How do you get over the loss of a sibling?’ Owen asked, as he looked up at her with teary eyes.

‘ You don’t get over it, the pain will remain with you for the rest of your life.’ she answered sadly. ‘ It would dull over time, but there is this ache that remains. I miss Derek too and think of him all the time.’

‘ For years I was clinging on to the tiny bit of hope that she might still be alive.’ Owen admitted, a downcast and crestfallen look on his face. ‘ And tonight that tiny glimpse of hope I had was crushed. I miss her so much. We had so many wonderful memories together. She’s my only sister, my only sibling.’ he shook his head sadly.

‘ I know.’ Amelia whispered softly, nodding her head in an understanding manner.

‘ I shouldn’t have let her get on the helicopter.’ he said angrily. ‘ Had I prevented her from doing so, she would still be alive right now. It’s my fault.’

‘ It’s not your fault, Owen.’ said Amelia earnestly as she held his hands in hers.

‘ It IS my fault.’ Owen insisted, frowning.

‘ Owen, look here.’ said Amelia as she cupped his face in her hands, tilting his head upwards so their eyes met.

‘ It’s not your fault, Owen. You wouldn’t have known that the helicopter would crash.  I’m sure if you knew, you wouldn’t have let her get on it.’ said Amelia as she continued looking into his eyes.

‘ They said that they found her body near the wreckage site. I really hope that she didn’t suffer too much before she…died..’ said Owen sadly, a distant look in his eyes.

‘ I hope so too.’ said Amelia softly, taking his hands in hers and using her thumb to rub soothing motions on the palm of his hands. ‘ I’m not religious, but I would like to think that she’s in a better place. That’s what I do to cheer myself up- I tell myself that my dad, Ryan, my first baby and Derek are all up in heaven, watching and smiling down at us.’

Owen closed his eyes for a moment as he tried to imagine Megan smiling down at him from heaven with her beautiful smile. He wasn’t by any means religious, but he had to admit, it was a comforting thought indeed. And maybe, his and Cristina’s aborted child was also with her, smiling down at him. Maybe Megan was taking care of his child in heaven.

They both sat in silence on the couch, thinking about their loved ones in heaven. Amelia’s head was leaned against Owen’s chest as she cuddled up close to him.

Amelia’s hand covered Owen’s as she slowly guided his hand until it rested on her growing baby bump. Over the past two weeks, the bump had grown significantly, and now more than half the hospital knew her secret.

She placed her hand over his, as both of them savored the feel of their baby under their touch.

It was then that Owen realized he had to let go of his sister, she was never coming back. It saddened him deeply, but he knew that Megan would always be with him- in his heart, and smiling down at him and his family. He loved her so much, she was his only sister and she occupied a special place in his heart. However, he knew that she was never returning to him and he had to move on. At least this was the sense of closure he needed, as sad as it was. Megan was his past, but Amelia and their baby are his future.

It was Amelia whom he would lean to for support during Megan’s funeral, and throughout the subsequent years when he would think of her. Life went on though, and he knew that Megan was smiling down at him, watching him build his family as Charlotte, Noah and Olivia arrived. Megan would live through his youngest daughter, Olivia, whose middle name was Megan after her aunt Megan. As she grew, he would notice more and more of her aunt Megan’s characteristics in her, not only in terms of appearance, but also personality. He knew that It was Megan’s way of telling him that she was never truly gone.

Comments, reviews, reblogs and messages are very much appreciated! :)

[zutaralesbian]

black sails :)

Thanks!

Top 5 favourite characters: Max, Eleanor Guthrie, Anne Bonny, James Flint, and MadiOther characters you like: Miranda Barlow, John Silver, Thomas Hamilton, Idelle, and Mr. ScottLeast favourite characters: Charles Vane and Woodes Rogers. (Also all the obvious characters like Peter Ashe, Ned Lowe, and Thomas’ father…but it would take all day to name off all of them). Otps: Max/Anne, Max/Eleanor, Flint/Thomas, Silver/MadiNotps: Eleanor/Vane, Eleanor/WoodesFavourite friendships: Flint/Eleanor, Flint/Silver (I get the appeal of seeing it as romantic too but eh, it’s just not for me), Flint/Miranda, Thomas/Miranda, Flint/Madi, Eleanor/Madi, Max/Idelle, and Anne/Jack, even though I have some issues with it.Favourite family: I don’t think there were a lot of blood family dynamics on the show? Eleanor and her father was probably the most prominent one and he was an asshole, so lol. There is Madi/Mr. Scott, even though it didn’t get the attention it deserved. Favourite episodes: 1x06, 2x02, 2x07, 3x09, 4x08Favourite season/book/movie: Season 2Favourite quotes: Ahh that’s hard because there’s sooo many good speeches on this this show lol. But to name a few:

Flint’s “Dragons in the darkness” speech

Max’s “There is nothing important that does not include you” speech

Madi’s “A chorus of voices” speech

Eleanor’s “Too many goddamn men” speech

Anne’s “I can’t be your wife, Jack” speech

Best musical moment: Idk. I can’t really think of any specific musical moments?

Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest: The Maxanne snow scene in 4x08. Also the Flinthamilton reunion in the series finale. I cried.When it really disappointed you: When they didn’t have any Maxanne scenes in the finale. I would say Eleanor’s death but even though that obviously made me sad, I also knew she was going to die eventually from spoilers :(Saddest moment: Eleanor’s death :( And Miranda’s death. Especially with Flint’s reaction to it.Most well done character death: Vane. I know i’m probably biased because I hate him (lol) but I truly do think it was well done. With how tumultuous his relationship with Eleanor was, I think it was fitting that he died partly at her hands. Favourite guest star:Favourite cast member: I haven’t really read or seen anything about the cast members so idk. Jessica Parker Kennedy is beautiful though. Character you wish was still alive: Eleanor and Miranda :(One thing you hope really happens:Most shocking twist: Thomas being alive. (I’m still AMAZED that I wasn’t spoiled about that beforehand because omg). It was a very beautiful surprise though. When did you start watching/reading?: I think…about a month and a half ago? I binged watched pretty recently.Best animal/creature: IdkFavourite location: Nassau, I guess lolTrope you wish they would stop using: I can’t really think of a trope that they did repeatedly that I didn’t like. There’s obviously things that I didn’t like (Max’s r*pe story line in S1, for example. That was pretty hard for me to watch and if it wasn’t for the fact that I knew things eventually got better for Max, it might have made me quit watching). But nothing that was done over and over again like on GoT.One thing this show/book/film does better than others: LGBT REPRESENTATION. Also the writing for women. And general story telling tbh.Funniest moments: 

The scenes with Silver and Randall in S1. “You’re a thief” lol. 

Eleanor finding Silver handcuffed in her office. 

Also the classic: “So I really have to fight him?” “Well what the fuck did you think was going to happen?!” Lol

(Honestly a lot of Silver scenes made me laugh. He was pretty funny at times.)

Couple you would like to see: Eleanor with someone decent lol. Max was her only good love interest :/Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: Favourite outfit: Pretty much everything Max woreFavourite item: IdkDo you own anything related to this show/book/film?: Nope. I might buy the DVD’s someday thoughWhat house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?: I don’t really know. I doubt i’d be a pirate though lolMost boring plotline: Most of Vane’s story linesMost laughably bad moment: None. The threesome scene with Max, Anne, and Jack was eh…awkward though. Best flashback/flashfoward if any: The Flint, Thomas, and Miranda flashbacks in S2Most layered character: Pretty much all of the characters are really layered. Even the ones I don’t like. The writers didn’t fuck around with character building. I guess i’ll say Flint though, since he’s the main and the most time went into him.Most one dimensional character: Idk. The characters who got killed after only one or two lines.Scariest moment: Blackbeard’s death. That was brutal.Grossest moment: Can’t think of a specific oneBest looking male: In my lesbian opinion…maybe Flint, Silver, or Billy?Best looking female: MaxWho you’re crushing on (if any): Max. Eleanor, and Anne. (And the best part is, they’re all three canonically not straight. So i’d have a chance.)Favourite cast moment:Favourite transportation: Ships, I guess lolMost beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): I can’t think of a specific one but any shots of the ocean, especially if there was a ship sailing.Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you: I don’t really like that the Maxanne relationship status was never solidly confirmed? I mean, i’m assuming they got back together because of the hand-holding scene, but I would have liked more confirmation :/Best promo: I binged it so idkAt what point did you fall in love with this show/book: S1 was alright but S2 was what showed me that it was going to become one of my faves.

[womenofcolor15]

'Love & Marriage: Huntsville' Star Melody Holt Takes On Fans Criticizing Her Announcing Pregnancy After Cheating Husband Revealed His 3-Year Affair

Mess.

  If you haven't been watching "Love and Marriage: Huntsville," you might want to start.  One of the three featured couples is going through a cheating scandal that's rocking the internets.  Deets inside.

After selling themselves as the ultimate #Couplegoals throughout the first half of this premiere season of OWN's "Love & Marriage: Huntsville," fans are learning all that glitters aint gold.  Or silver.

Entrepreneurial couple Melody & Martell Holt kicked off the premiere of the second half of season 1 this past Sunday with a bombshell - Martell had been having an affair with one particular woman for the last 3 years.

        View this post on Instagram

                  Magnificent Sunday! Beautiful and healthy children! Thank you Jesus for EVERYTHING! In case the guys are wondering: The fit is inspired by Connaisseur Paris in Atlanta, Ga. #LAMH

A post shared by Martell Holt (@martellholt) on Aug 11, 2019 at 9:40am PDT

  While the twosome have been selling books, merch and a narrative about women empowerment, business empowerment and black love, Martell was out here doing the absolute most.  And it all came to light on the show - possibly for ratings, we don't know - after the mistress "randomly called Martell's phone" recently despite Martell's claims he had cut off communication several months prior.

Chile....

On Sunday's episode, Melody paid a visit to a divorce lawyer to "explore her options" while Martell saw a therapist to get to the bottom of why he cheated - for 3 years - with a mistress he now calls "low class" and "a peasant".

Check it:

Folks love to speak down on the person THEY chose to cheat with, don't they? If you cheated with someone who is, in your eyes, less than your own wife, what does that say about you? You literally risked it all for someone you claim is a low class peasant. Aside from it being problematic that a man calls any woman these names, it's especially problematic when he says it about a woman he voluntarily put his penis in.

Mind boggling.

Just speak about yourself, sir. Berating the other woman publicly, likely just to make your wife feel better, ain't it.

Meanwhile, Melody confirms she is, in fact, pregnant.  The teaser for next week's episode shows her wondering if she is.

        View this post on Instagram

                  Woman: Fierce, Bold, Strong, Spiritual, Healer, Lover. #lamh @owntv @ownkeepitreal Photo @pbd Stylist @troy_clinton Hair @allaboutglo Makeup @jaye_webster

A post shared by Melody Holt (@melodysholt) on Sep 9, 2019 at 8:00am PDT

  The couple already has three kids, but fans who were once all about The Holts are seemingly not here for this new pregnancy revelation.

Melody went back and forth yesterday with one of her fans in her comment section:

1bossybeauty @melodysholt I understand that the show was recorded earlier...that being said, you seemed so committed to what you "deserved" as a wife. I believe in the covenants shared between husband, wife and God; the covenant of respect is major. On the show, @martellholt has zero respect. Even while packing, he was protesting and blaming you, for his bad behavior! Mel, I don't know you but, you move like a #boss. Martell appears to lack basic respect for his marriage. His "peasant" comment was not a good look. He seems to know the cost of THINGS but not the VALUE of people. You "deserve" a man that recognizes your value and worth. I'm am praying for you and definitely for him...he needs a "come to Jesus" moment. I wish you continued #peace & #blessings.

1bossybeauty This show may be scripted...but, he's doing a hell of a job "acting" like a #whole flamboyant double-sided ass hole. And why is he so made at his side piece? She's a #peasant and low class? But he chose her, time and again, for almost 3 years! #boybye

melodysholt @1bossybeauty mad? Who ever said that? He was in HIS therapy session and was posed a question. It behooves me how people say so much behind closed doors but when it's said out front then everybody becomes holier than thou. How many times have folks talked about how men cheat "down" versus "up" and so much more. How many women have found out about their men cheating and called the other woman alllllllll kinds of names. People just don't even know how to accept "real" anymore smh. Because they're so used to folks being "fake"

It didn't stop there:

1bossybeauty @melodysholt Sis, I don't know your husband but, on the show during his therapy session; in my unqualified opinion, there seems to be an under current of anger. Again, I don't know him. I don't understand why he would now be calling his side piece any type names when he was the one that put her in the position to disrespect his marriage. He's YOUR husband, he is suppose to protect and respect his marriage. She has no obligation to respect you, there exist no covenant between you and her. They are both to blame but, he is RESPONSIBLE for his marriage and he is RESPONSIBLE for your heart. No need to belittle her when he's almost 3 years in. My opinion. I'm not saying that I would give up on my husband but, I would make some changes. However, I respect your commitment to your family and your marriage. 17h

melodysholt @1bossybeauty As a WOMAN, I would NEVER know I'm doing wrong by another woman and be disrespectful to her on top of that. That's just not how I roll. So yes, me being the woman I am to so many other women, ALL women get my respect until they do something towards me that's awfully terrible and no longer deserve it. And yes, viewers are only seeing a piece of an ENTIRE story. But enough of that, hope you're having an amazing day and reaching some amazing goals sis

1bossybeauty @melodysholt I agree with you about how you move with regards to other women...but, all females are not women. All females don't possess respect for themselves; they have never been shown what that looks like. She is to blame for her part and he is responsible for protecting your heart and your family. I am praying for y'all because I believe in marriage and I want to see you #win. Thanks for chatting with me, you're so sweet. 17h

blissdumas @melodysholt no shade but seriously incorrect use of the word “behooves”. Behooves refers to a “duty or responsibility for someone to do something; it is incumbent upon. It befits, it is appropriate or suitable.”

melodysholt @blissdumas sweetie you know I'm urban so you gotta google that urban dictionary definition

Ha!

     Whew.

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                  Life is a gift. To birth life is a blessing. Photographer @pbd Hair @allaboutglo Makeup @jaye_webster Stylist @troy_clinton Assistant Stylist @dramontcollection @owntv @kingdomreignent @thecarlosking_ @absolutelyyyangie @b.r.3.n.t #lamh #melodysholt #holtnholt #mnmkids #babybump #motherhood

A post shared by Melody Holt (@melodysholt) on Sep 4, 2019 at 4:56am PDT

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                  Morning beautiful people! Check out the behind the scenes video of my maternity shoot. Peace and calmness #allpregnancylong. Photographer @pbd Stylist @troy_clinton Makeup @jaye_webster Hair @allaboutglo #lamh #melodysholt

A post shared by Melody Holt (@melodysholt) on Sep 5, 2019 at 7:06am PDT

As for whether Melody & Martell are still together today, in real time, it's unclear. But we do know they were happy-go-lucky in love 6 weeks ago.

        View this post on Instagram

                  Out here at the beach enjoying some much needed #vacay time! The beach is definitely my relaxing spot. Been working sooo hard the last 3 months, glad to chill a little

A post shared by Melody Holt (@melodysholt) on Jul 24, 2019 at 5:59pm PDT

Melody also commented on Martell's post about an hour ago saying she's happy "we" are back in the 'Ville:

        View this post on Instagram

                  Ok...let’s go! #LAMH

A post shared by Martell Holt (@martellholt) on Sep 8, 2019 at 9:35am PDT

Also, in OWN's press release with official promo shots sent to us back in August, there were no shots of Martell & Melody together.  There are shots of the 3 other couples, though.

And yes, Martell's followers are letting HIM have it, too:

d.p.johnson I was all for you until you called your mistress a peasant. I get you were trying to win your wife back, but to insult someone whom you were attracted to, only makes you look bad. Her being "low class" wasn't an issue when you were with her and allegedly in love. That was wrong on so many levels. Y'all aren't THAT all that to be looking down on people. Can y'all please represent Alabama with a LITTLE decency? 2d

pylesofstyle @d.p.johnson Right?!! If she is a low class peasant what does that make him? That was hard to watch especially on a rare show that has been one of the most sophisticated and tactful shows I have ever seen. 17h

warddanita He called his girlfriend a peasant she was not a peasant when you being laying with her for the pass 3 years and still having conversation with her 2d

leenthagemini Stop saying cheating is trial and tribulations CHEATING is a fucking CHOICE 2d

That last comment though....Can we get a hand clap?!

          View this post on Instagram

                  Up in the clouds, Me and my spouse, Rumors on the ground gettin’ too loud, Please turn that ish down. @melodysholt @thecarlosking_ @owntv #lamh

A post shared by Martell Holt (@martellholt) on Mar 7, 2019 at 6:25am PST

Chile....

  Photo: Getty

[Read More ...] source http://theybf.com/2019/09/11/love-marriage-huntsville-star-melody-holt-takes-on-fans-criticizing-her-announcing-pregna

[ugdigital]

[EXCLUSIVE] @JONCHAFFIN : THE HAVES AND THE HAVE NOTS

If you’ve been following the last few weeks, you’ve seen the various features we’ve run here at UGD in support of The Haves and the Have Nots. This week, we catch up with Jon Chaffin, who plays one of the show’s most loved and hated characters, Warlock. Without going into heavy detail of his character, Jon Chaffin displays some of the best acting we’ve seen with his character, and it undoubtedly has taken the show to amazing heights. He’s got millions of fans tuning in each week to see what’s going to happen next on the show. The season is currently reaching it’s climax, and things are getting really heated right now. Jon sits down for a few moments to talk with us about the show, what’s to come, and also the many amazing things he has going on in his career outside of HAHN. 

  U.G. Digital Mag: First off Mr Chaffin, this is a tremendous honor to connect with you because you are one of the best I’ve seen do this. I imagine you hear it a lot, and I know the type of person you are so you don’t feed off it, but I still imagine you get it a lot. Even with what you are doing with The Haves and the Have Nots, it’s inspiring to so many. Not even fronting, I watch the show and am a die hard fan. I have said for so long that I wanted to connect, not just about the show, but also your journey. Many want to do this, and get into entertainment, acting, or more, and they get discouraged. With all you’re doing, you show people they can do it, do what they love, and make a living. They can prosper financially and professionally. I haven’t seen anybody else deliver what you do with HAHN. We regular push this man, in terms of following your passion. I walked away from career to build this publication that offers an alternative, and something that’s culture bending, and just not the norm. We love to show the positivity in people like yourself. Thank you for that. I know it’s a mouth full. 

 Jon Chaffin: Wow. I appreciate it and am really humbled by it. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: It’s cool, too, because again, people easily get discouraged, and I’ve been there. This initially made no money. I had to maintain family and all else for something I love. Looking at you and so many others, you see first hand that when you put your heart and passion in, it works out. 

 Jon Chaffin: Yes sir. I appreciate that so much. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: My goal has been to connect with everybody from the show. It’s funny because I reached out to Crystal Fox, who plays Hanna, and we did that. Then I reached out to Presilah Nunez, who plays Erica. That’s running now. You’re will run here on the site and in the issue. On a side note, you worked with Markice Moore in a films that we’ll discuss later in our conversation, and he’s doing the cover. It’s so cool to see what’s going on with HAHN, and how big it has become. Getting into the show, how did War come about for you?

 Jon Chaffin: It was an audition. My agent sent it to me. I did it the old-fashioned way. They liked it and brought me in for the callback. I had to go in to do it in Atlanta because I was in LA at the time. I’m still in LA. But I had to go to Atlanta for Tyler and the producers. I did my thing, and initially, I knew who this guy was. I grew up with people like him, and been around people like him. I was able to find the connection and bring it to life. Through the process, I was able to dive deeper into the psyche and personality. It was all done the old-fashioned way. I gave them my take and they liked it. As they say, the rest is history. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: Someone like myself, I have watched since day one. I DVR’d because I worked so much. Now I take an iPad to work with me to make sure I catch it. I binge watch at times just out of love for the show.  What’s cool is it unites people with families. I watch with my mother, my wife loves it, my son loves it and begs me to DVR it. It’s funny because we watched last night, and I work a night shift gig. We watched, and as it went off, he was saying he wished another episode was coming on. Did you expect this type of success with it, especially reaching all age groups like it does? People either love or hate War. 

    Jon Chaffin: Yea. I had no idea. Initially it was one episode. Candace had come to him because she had gotten all her belongings taken. It wasn’t written that I would have a long shelf life. When I did it, Tyler really liked it, and he said he would write more for the character. You just never know, which is why you have to focus on the work and not so much the outcome. I didn’t go in with the idea that I would love for it to be a regular character. I just did my things, and that opened up the opportunity for more. I was totally surprised by what this role had become because like I said, it wasn’t written for that. I had no idea it would go this far, or fans would gravitate to it the way they have. It’s been an awesome ride. They either love me, or hate me. They love to hate me, hate to love me. It’s what we hope for as actors, is that the audience gravitate to the character and the work. We want to move them in some fashion, and the fact that I did that means job well done. They love the character and it’s been a blessing. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: It’s cool because a lot of characters in many of Tyler’s shows are that way. Presilah Nunez said the same thing. She was only there for three episodes, and it grew. Crystal Fox was to be there long term obviously, but it’s great to see the smaller roles growing the way they do. I never imagined it would get this big, even though i saw big things. On Facebook, there’s a ton of groups, and I usually do some promotion there. People are like die hard fans. They have groups and everything with thousands of members. They LIVE chat each week, and they go in hard. I know Angela chats live sometimes. She actually did the cover of our first issue. Do you find time, even with how incredibly busy you are, to get on Facebook and chat?

 Jon Chaffin: Oh yea. I get on, and try to respond as often as I can. i try not to live my life on social media, though. We’ve become a society that’s glued to our phones. I post and reply, but not all day and everyday. Sometimes, I LIVE tweet if I can catch the show. I am active in responding, and try to thank the fans. Without them, the show would not be what it is. We need the fans to love what we do so we can continue. I’m grateful for social media because it gives us the opportunity to connect directly with the fans. The comments, and gifs, have me cracking up. It’s hilarious, but it goes to show, like you said, how invested people are in these shows and characters. I go back to say it was unexpected that it would become this beloved character. I’m grateful. I try to reach out and thank them, or retweet. I can’t reply to everybody, but I try to like comments and let them know I see it and appreciate it. 

  U.G. Digital Mag: Keeping it real man, I know you can’t give nothing away, but I’d be crazy not to ask for a tidbit of intel?

 Jon Chaffin: [Laughing] You just gotta watch. Let’s just say the journey comes to full circle. Hopefully, the audience will enjoy the next episode. it will definitely put some people on the edge of their seats. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: I say again that you guys reach all generations. I also work with someone who’s in their seventies, and she asked me last night about the show. It’s cool that you can bring people together this way. It’s amazing what we can do through entertainment. 

 Jon Chaffin: Yea man. It’s a blessing to affect people that way. That’s the beauty of what we do as artists, whether acting, writing, or doing poetry. Our job is to reflect the times in which we live. When we can reach and connect with people, that’s it. It’s good when people are affected in a positive way. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: So this is where I start to transition into some of your other work. I love how supportive the entire cast is of each other. No matter what it is, everyone supports. You did King Hedley II and you also did 96 Minutes, which paired you with Evan Ross, David Oyelowo, Markice Moore, and Hosea Chanchez. You did really good with the character, which was also somewhat villainous. In 96 minutes, what was it like bringing the role of JJ to life?

 Jon Chaffin: That was an awesome experience to work with Aimee Lagos, who wrote and directed, David Oyelowo who is amazing at what he does, Evan Ross, and Markice Moore. It was really great. I knew people like that character, but it was also a learning experience. This was earlier in my career. It was a good learning curve to be on set with those veterans. I tried to learn as much as I could, and bring honesty and truth to the role. You never know how it will come out or how people will gravitate to it. You hope for good. I’ve played a variety of roles. To me, I don’t get caught up in the role. Each person has a story to tell. We are all humans and capable of the same thing. Each character deserves the same respect. I don’t get caught up in the idea of being type-cast. I make it a point not to play each role the same way because they’re all different.

 U.G. Digital Mag: The phrase you said, “I Love what I do”; that’s where we all want to get. That resonated really good in King Hedley II. I haven’t seen it yet because I’m in Ohio, but I’ve seen the promo. I’ve seen your postings on social media, and I see the postings from others. It appears to have done extremely well for you. 

 Jon Chaffin: Yea. King Hedley II is one of August Wilson’s plays. It’s set in 1985 in his ten-play cycle in Pittsburgh in the Hill district, about King, who is returning home from a 7-year prison stint, and he’s trying to reingratiate himself into society, his wife is pregnant, and he’s trying to start a business to make money to get going in life. I play Mister, his best friend, side kick, and sometimes business partner. It was a great opportunity to get on stage and do this play, and say those words. Michele Shay who is an August Wilson-ian; she originates the role of Louise in Seven Guitars. She and Viola Davis did it on Broadway. She’s done a number of August Wilson’s plays, and she directed this production. Like you saw on Instagram, we had a great turn-out. A lot of my cast members came out, and a lot of celebrities came out. It’s a timely piece. It’s set in ’85, but the challenges they were dealing with are prevalent today in what we deal with in society. To be able to go on stage and do theatre; there’s something in that. There’s an energy you don’t get with a television show or movie. In theatre, the audience is right there and in the moment. They laugh at things you didn’t expect them to laugh at, and then they don’t laugh when you thought they would. It’s like, you have to be totally focused and in a zone with theatre. It’s a great workout, and I always wanted to do something by August Wilson. When the opportunity came, I jumped in with both feet. I plan to do more. I hope to do another play if not this year, definitely next year. We did this out here in LA, which is not known for theatre, although they’ve done some great theatre, and it was great to get the response we got.

 U.G. Digital Mag: What’s the biggest lesson in your journey?

 Jon Chaffin: Not to expect anything. Roll with the punches. Don’t expect anyone to give you anything, and don’t expect a return on your investment. We want what we want right then, but a career takes time to develop. I’ve learned to be patient. I’ve learned to work hard, and believe in myself. In acting, moreso than any other career or vocation, you use yourself, and need to know who you are as a person. The more you know, and the more comfortable you are, the more you can look at your flaws and embrace the imperfections, and the more you can give to the character and story. That’s what makes a great actor. They’re able to give freely of themselves, and unblock the extra. I’ve just learned to be a professional but not expect anything and work hard. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: What have you taken away from the level of success black actors are beginning to see? You have people like Gabrielle Union, and you have Sanaa Lathan who was doing Shots Fired which was shockingly canceled… I thought it was so dope … but even outside of that, people like Tyler Perry are doing so amazing, and bringing opportunities to the table. I know when you came into this, the opportunities were fewer, and farther between. There’s been so much growth. 

  Jon Chaffin: Everything happens in waves. If you really think about it, in the nineties and earlier 2000s, we has a lot of shows, but we also were building the networks up. The CW was there, then they canceled Girlfriends, Fox had Martin and Living Single, NBC had The Fresh Prince of Bel Air. We had a lot of shows and then they died off. But now, especially with social media, people can express what they want to see, and everybody has the ability to voice their opinions as far as what they want. The conversation is being blown open. It’s a great time because there’s so much content, and so many avenues to get it out. It’s not just the major networks anymore. Sign up for cable and you get hundreds of channels. Then the streaming services. Netflix and Hulu. All these avenues, and everyone vies for attention. People are watching television on phones and laptops now. It’s a great time for artists of color to get opportunities, and create their own opportunities. Shots Fired, I thought it was great as well, but you also realize it’s a business. Shows will come and go. Sanaa Lathan will be on something else when you look up because she’s amazing. Its hard to get a show to a second season, third, and fourth. I can’t even go through all the shows that are out. People ask me if I’ve seen Game of Thrones, and I haven’t. I’m like, it’s seven seasons in. Ain’t no point of even jumping in now. I would literally have to spend my whole week or two glued to the television. I just don’t have that time. That goes to show how much is out there. You try to find what you like and ride with them. You miss a week or two and get left behind. The way the shows are done now is changing. They don’t do 23 episodes in a season. Now they do 10 or 13. They air the first 10 in the spring, and then you don’t see it again until the fall. I was just talking with my fiancé about when How to Get Away with Murder is coming back on. I feel like I haven’t seen it in forever. It’s so many other things you’re watching. It’s good and bad. Right now it’s a great time for actors, writers, and producers. There’s such a need for content, and so many more avenues to get it out. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: You’re right, though. I’m the exact same way in the fact that I work so much that I miss a lot of TV. My wife and I just started streaming, and we’re doing Roku now. 

 Jon Chaffin: Right. That’s where the industry is going. People were hanging on for sports, but you look at Netflix, Hulu, and Amazon, and soon the services will be as much as cable because you’ll have 5 or 6 subscriptions. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: Right. I just binge watched Survivor’s Remorse, and saw how amazing it was. You’re definitely right about the content out there. What are you most thankful for?

 Jon Chaffin: Just being able to do what I love. Having the opportunity to pursue my dreams. I’m thankful for life and good health. We take for granted the little things. I‘m grateful I’ve been gifted this talent to entertain, and the opportunity to pursue it, perfect it, and work at it. We spoke earlier about you leaving your job to do what you love. I’m a firm believer of not living your life with what ifs. As you have children, and I don’t but hope to some day, you want to push them to pursue their goals some day. It would be hard if I didn’t do it for myself. I want to lead by example. Go after what you truly desire in your heart because tomorrow is not promised. We’re all going to die at some point, so when you realize that, you come to realize nothing is as serious as we make it. Live a life that it pleasing to yourself that you can enjoy. Try not to hurt anybody in the process. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: Everyone has watched your journey. We saw that you went to school and put yourself in a place to be noticed. What advice do you offer to those out there who dream of this type of life, or any profession?

 Jon Chaffin: I would say learn as much about the path that you are about to take. Understand that it doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time. Have a talk with yourself about the reasons for wanting to do it. I get asked a lot about how someone should start, and when you tell them, they have a look like “I actually have to do work?”. What are you doing it for? Do you want to be seen and famous, or is there something you have to get out, or stories you have to tell? That’s why I ask people. If this is something you want to do, you have to believe it is possible. You can’t get discouraged by the naysayers. Fulfill the promise to yourself. Push yourself and strive to go that extra mile. What people don’t understand is it’s not hard. It’s just hard to believe. That’s the hardest part. Once you conquer that part, the rest is about putting in the work and letting the chips fall where they may. You have people who pursue for years and it’s like there’s nothing; then you have people who step off the boat and jump and they blow up. I can’t say it will take ten years, or ten days. Every path is different. I say to stay encouraged. Learn the business and craft. Study it. You’ll have to study it for the rest of your life. You’ll never have it all. We grow, evolve, experience life and change, and you have to incorporate it into your work. You have to believe in yourself. That’s what I believe is the formula. If you need to listen to motivational speakers to keep you motivated, do it. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t second guess sometimes, or wonder if something was going to work. I also ask myself if there would be anything else that would make me more happy, and luckily that answer has been no. That’s how I know I’m on the right path, but if there’s something else you can do to make you happy, I say go and do that. This is a tough business and it’s not for the faint at heart. 

 U.G. Digital Mag: I thank you for so many things, especially the encouragement that I and so many others get. Again, we watched you work from the bottom up. I take it back to the show as well. I love the show and character. I’m counting down til next Tuesday. It’s dope and I love what you guys do. I appreciate your time. It’s cool to connect with people you admire. 

 Jon Chaffin: I appreciate you man. Thank you so much. The words gave me life today and I needed that.

[whimsicallyenchantedrose]

Initial Thoughts--6x12 Murder Most Foul

--Well that episode was…..kind of amazing!  I honestly loved it!  Yeah that twist at the end hurt a lot for a Hook fan, and had some definite timeline issues, but I’ve got to say, as a writer I appreciated it soooo much! That’s the kind of twist-that-completely-turns-a-story-on-its-head that writers live to create!  

--And before we get into any more, let’s keep a few things in mind.  *****warning!  Spoilers ahead!  If you don’t want to see spoilers past 6x12 skip to the next paragraph!  I’m serious!  Abandon all hope of staying spoiler free all ye who enter here! Okay, don’t say I didn’t warn you.**** So we know the CS wedding is in 6x20. Before the CS wedding can take place, there needs to be a proposal.  Likely there are a few episodes in between the proposal and the wedding.  No way Killian proposes until this secret is out in the open.  So what does all this tell us?  This whole thing is resolved within a matter of an episode or two.  The pain will be short-lived.

--Okay.  I’ll talk about that shocker of an ending in a moment, but first, let’s focus on what we got up until that moment.  

--Let’s start with OQ…such as it is.  I knew as soon as I saw the sneak peak of Regina’s talk with Snow that things were going to go horribly wrong.  I feel so bad for Regina.  She misses Robin so badly, and she’s trying so desperately to find what she had before with this new Robin, but it’s just not the same.  HE’s not the same.  I think there’s more to this Robin than meets the eye.  I don’t think he’s just some sort of AU version of himself cooked up by the EQ’s wish.  I think, in some way, this is the Robin we know…but as he would have been without ever knowing Marian. He’s darker, without that strong moral code our Robin has.

--That kiss was heartbreaking.  Regina’s starting to realize she can’t just wake up her Robin within this guy.  He’s not the same guy she fell in love with.  Now the big question is what is Robin’s agenda?  What does he want with that box from her vault?  

--And then there’s Zelena. I have a feeling we’re about to get into some bumpy seas ahead with her.  It’s clear WW Robin showing up makes her feel threatened and thus reawakens her wicked side.  She’s going to make trouble.  I can feel it.

--And now back to Captain Charming Swan…

--Poor David!  He’s clearly at the end of his rope and barely hanging on.  He really needs Snow to help ground him, so everything is hitting him even harder than it normally would.

--I love how eager Killian is to help David…but also how clearly he realizes that David is making some epic mistakes in his thinking.  I love that when push comes to shove, Killian stops David from doing something he can’t come back from.

--King George is still a world class jerk.  Regardless of who did the actual stabbing, I still say George has daddy Nolan’s blood on his hands.  He ordered the hit.  (Not to say Killian wasn’t incredibly wrong for what he did.)

--I felt so bad for Killian in the present timeline.  He’s worked so hard to change, but he still wonders if he could ever be good enough for Emma.  Such a wonderful step toward a healthy way of dealing with his insecurities though, going to a therapist to talk things out!  Our little stab-happy pirate is learning!

--And the ring!  It’s happening folks!  The CS wedding arc is beginning!  I knew proposal talk was coming in this episode, but I was not prepared for the feels.  I was definitely not prepared for the feels!

--Wow, we once again got Rumple being…Rumple in the past.  It was just plain nasty to offer a cure for whatever illness was attacking the Nolan boys but make the parents choose to give one of their son’s up to save the other one.  Totally heartless there!

--Both of the CS solo scenes in this episode were absolutely amazing!  Emma is so completely in love with Killian, and this episode showed that to full display.  She’s completely and totally smitten.  It’s beautiful to behold.

--I know Killian’s main mission was to stall Emma in that scene where David was stealing her potion making materials, but it got real, and it got emotional.  I loved that Killian shared his pain and fears over what almost happened with Gideon.  So glad he got a chance to express that.  And he was this close to proposing right then and there!  If only David’s timing wasn’t so absolutely awful!

--Captain Charming with their little magical chemistry set was hilarious!  The two of them turning in a circle counter clockwise because they didn’t want to take a chance they’d mess up the spell if they just moved the beaker, lol!

--I was so proud of Daddy Nolan!  He’d become a drunk, was in danger of losing his family and ruining his life, but then he turned it around.  In the end, he proved himself willing to stand up to King George himself in order to protect his son.

--My absolute favorite scene in the episode…probably my favorite scene in a long time was the scene between Killian and David in the mental hospital.  I loved Killian stepping in and stopping David from murdering George.  I loved how calm and collected Killian was while he let David rage at him.  I loved the way David finally broke and admitted what’s really bothering him. What if even if he is a hero he can’t get his happy ending?  What if he can’t break the curse with his wife?  What if he can’t protect his daughter?   David is defined by his fierce love and protective instincts toward his family.  The thought of failing his family, of failing to protect them, it kills him, and it totally explains this week’s behavior. The vulnerability he showed, breaking down and admitting this to Killian…perfect.  

--I loved that once again, Killian gave David the choice.  He told him he’d step aside….but he also made sure David realized what the choice to kill George would end up doing to him.  It would destroy him.  The way David just started sobbing then and Killian hugged him was everything I could have hoped for these two in this episode!  It was one of those moments that completely solidifies a friendship. And while I’m talking about this particular scene, how about a standing ovation for Colin and especially Josh. That was A+ acting if ever I saw it!

--The scene between David and Killian at the harbor was, likewise, everything I could have wished. I loved David thanking Killian for stopping him and apologizing for what happened earlier in the day.  And, of course, the actual conversation asking for the blessing was perfect.  Killian was nervous, but also confident.  It was clear he not only loves Emma, but loves the whole family and truly respects David.  It was also clear that it was simply a blessing being asked and given not “permission”.

--Alright, we’ve put it off about as long as we can.  Let’s talk about that ending scene.  I was genuinely shocked to find out that Killian actually was the one who killed David’s father.  I really didn’t see that coming!  For one thing…it really doesn’t fit with the timeline.  (What? A&E messed up a timeline?  I’m shocked!  Shocked I tell you!)  Killian wasn’t back in the Enchanted Forest until a couple decades after David’s dad was killed.  I suppose they could make it work by saying Killian was on a snack run for Pan…but they would definitely have been better off making that clear if it’s the case.

--Do I like that it turned out to be Hook that did the deed?  I’m kind of of two minds here.  On the one hand, no, I don’t like that Killian seems to be constantly hit over the head with things from the past coming back to haunt him.  We know Killian was a bad guy in the past.  (Good grief!  He killed his own father.  How much worse can you get?)  But he’s changed; he’s not that man anymore.  We’ve had multiple “Killian did something bad in the past and he has makes up for it in the present” incidents throughout the show. Does another one really add anything?  Can the guy get a break?  Why does he have to be constantly raked over the coals?

--On the other hand…part of me really likes it.  No, I don’t like that Killian killed daddy Nolan, but I like that Killian’s redemption gets to be refined even further.  Every terrible deed from Killian’s past that he confronts is a further step toward complete redemption.  By confronting his past misdeeds and truly trying to make them right, he shows that his redemption is hard-fought and earned.  Quite simply, confronting another crime from his past makes Killian a better man in the present, and I’m 100% here for that.

--I can see yet another good come out of this painful, painful revelation—maybe by dealing with this awful moment from his past, Killian will be able to finally find that self-forgiveness he’s still lacking.  In case we hadn’t realized it was still the last thing holding him back from full redemption, it was brought up again at the beginning of season 7 when Killian had that talk with Belle on the Jolly about how he can’t forgive himself. Until he does, he’s a prisoner of his guilt.  I have hope this incident, and the love of Emma and the rest of the family, will help him jump over this one last hurdle to total hero status.

--The episode left us wondering exactly what Killian would do, how he would deal with this new knowledge of just what happened to David’s dad.  I think the promo for 6x13 gave us a pretty good hint of that.  He goes to Archie almost right away and confesses the whole thing to him and asks for advice.  Killian has learned from his past mistakes.  He knows he can’t just keep this secret to himself.  He can’t just go ahead with the proposal and pretend like everything’s fine with this hanging over his head.  It’s not.  He knows what the right thing is—telling Emma the truth, but he’s terrified of losing her if he tells her what he did in the past.  I honestly think he’ll come clean next episode.  He’ll tell Emma—and hopefully also David what he did, and then they will forgive him.  This isn’t going to be a big thing hanging over their heads.  It just isn’t.  Yes, the episode ended on a very angsty note, but this kind of angst will only end up strengthening the CS relationship.  They’ll be stronger than ever going into the big proposal in the very near future!

[anavoliselenu]

Creighton chapter 28

“I’m a man in love with an amazing woman, and while that argument will not hold weight in a court of law, in a court of public opinion, I think it makes perfect sense. The purchase of Homegrown was meant to be a surprise belated wedding present for my new wife, so I acted quickly, and perhaps without thinking things through in my normal logical fashion, because I wanted to do it before my beautiful, intelligent bride realized what I was doing.” I’m pretty sure every female in the crowd is now sighing. Glancing up from the podium, I see Selena standing in the back corner, and she’s lifting a hand to her face and dabbing at the underside of her eye. I don’t try to hold the smile back. “So, there you go. That’s the explanation I have for you. Now I’ll take your questions.” The flurry starts, but a booming voice cuts through the din. “You really think that ridiculous explanation is going to matter? Not likely, Justin. I thought you were smarter than that.” With that, my uncle Damon turns on his heel and leaves the room. I spend over an hour answering investor questions before my portion of the presentation is over. Selena is waiting at the back of the auditorium, and I stride to where she stands and pull her into my arms. “You know how to give one hell of a speech, Justin,” she says, speaking in muffled words into my chest. “I meant every word of it.” “Is Homegrown really my wedding present?” I loosen my grip and step back a fraction so I can look down into her eyes. “Yes. It was always for you.” Her brow furrows, concern shading her eyes. “Does that mean you expect me to run it?” “If you want to; you can do whatever you want. The management team I’ve got in place now is starting to turn things around, but if you want to get involved with the business side of things, you’re more than welcome.” I pause to tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. “I think that’d be sexy as fuck, if you want to know the truth . . . my wife, the CEO, running her own empire.” I groan as my dick jerks against my zipper. Not the time or the place, buddy. A small smile spreads over Selena’s face, which doesn’t help matters. “Justin.” The sound of Cannon’s voice, however, deflates my hard-on. Selena called it when she referred to him as a cock-blocker. Releasing Selena with one arm, I turn. “What do you need?” “What are you going to do about Damon?” “Besides take a hit out on him?” Cannon’s eyes widen only slightly. “I know a guy.” “Jesus. Fuck, Cannon. I’m joking.” He shrugs. “Desperate times.” “And that’s called conspiracy, and I don’t care to find out the New York prison system’s policy on conjugal visits.” At this, Selena snorts. “Can I second that?” A tall, thin black man approaches us. He’s the associate from the conference room who made the “Oh no, he didn’t” comment when Selena walked in. “Mr. Karas, Mr. Cramer wanted to run one more idea by you, given your uncle’s latest outburst. Could we have a few minutes of your time in the conference room across the hall?” I look to Selena, and she says, “Justin, do your thing. I’ll be waiting. I’m feeling an epic song about revenge coming on, à la Carrie Underwood’s ‘Two Black Cadillacs’ or maybe ‘Good-bye, Earl.’” Leaning down, I brush a kiss across her cheek. “I love you, woman. I’ll be right back.” “Give ’em hell. And I love you too.” I follow Cannon and the associate—I really need to get his name—to the conference room across the hall from the auditorium. My lawyer, Cramer is waiting, and he looks less than amused. I suppose it’s lucky that he works for me and not the other way around. “Save your breath, Cramer. You didn’t approve before, and you don’t approve now. I also know you’re not going to approve of what I’m going to do next.” “And what’s that, Mr. Karas?” he asks, the skepticism in his tone thinly veiled. One of the largest negative aspects of this suit is the element of fear that has slipped away from my persona. This will be remedied. I’m Justin fucking Karas, and the world will not question my judgment again when this is over. “My uncle may be brave enough to take me on in front of a crowd, but we’ll see how he feels about taking me on man-to-man.” The lawyer’s silver eyebrows hit his equally silver hairline. “That’s highly inadvisable.” “Consider it a family matter and none of your concern.” My words carry the unmistakable weight of authority. He swallows. “Mr. Karas, we have your best interests in mind here. I’m sure you understand.” “Of course, Mr. Cramer, but sometimes the only thing a bully understands is a bigger bully. It’s time the gloves come off. I’m done with his bullshit.” “You’re not going to listen to a logical, reasoned argument, no matter what I say, are you?” “There’s no reasoning with my uncle, so no. Save your breath.” “Fine.” Cramer nods. “We’ll leave you to it. Please call us if we can be of further assistance.” I turn and head for the door. “Cannon, walk out with me?” He’s on my heels as we hit the threshold.

“You’re not staying for the rest of Investor Day?” he asks. “You have a closing keynote.” I give him a sideways glance. “You think I don’t know that? I’ll try to be back in time. If I’m not, extend the dog-and-pony show. You’ve got promo videos and PowerPoints up the ass. Use something.” “And if that doesn’t work?” I stop, and my eyes cut to Selena. She’s curled up in a chair, scribbling in the journal resting on her knee. She’s so fucking beautiful, and I’d walk through a thousand shitstorms like the one swirling around us just to watch her like this. Not looking at Cannon, I say, “Improvise. That’s why I pay you the big bucks.” I take a step toward Selena, but pause when he lays a hand on my arm. “Justin.” I glance back at him. “What?” “Damon is fucking crazy. What he’s doing—his issue with you—that’s not based in logic. It never has been. Be careful. I don’t trust him, and I don’t think you should either.” I inhale, long and slow. “I know. This has been a long time coming.” “Good luck, man.” Cannon peels off and heads back in the direction of the auditorium, and I cross the half dozen yards between Selena and me. She’s so involved in her writing that she doesn’t notice me until I crouch in front of her. “I bet if I were naked, you’d notice me quicker.” Her head jerks up, and her smile is quick and bright. “Damn straight, I would. That dick of yours demands attention.” “Later. Definitely.” “Count on it. After all, I hear I got a hell of a wedding present, which means you’ve got a hell of a thank-you coming.” “Maybe I should book the room at the Plaza?” “Screw the Plaza. Let’s go back to Vegas. I didn’t get nearly enough time to enjoy that villa at Caesar’s.” I smile, thankful she’s not losing her mind over the Homegrown acquisition. “Deal. We sort this out, and you and I are going to high roll it in Vegas.” Selena leans forward and threads her fingers through my hair. “I’m going to head back to the penthouse to finish this song and pack. So, hurry up and sort it out.” “I’ll consider those my marching orders.” Her lips press against mine, and while I want to seize control, I’m aware of the people moving around us, their eyes on us. I pull away. “I’ll call you as soon as I’m on my way.” “You better.” Another quick kiss and then I step away. I don’t realize that the next time I see her, everything I think I know about myself will have changed irrevocably. I go first to my aunt and uncle’s penthouse in the city, but I’m informed by the doorman, who has been a fixture in the building for as long as I can remember, that my uncle’s already been and gone back to Westchester. Thanking him for the information, I slide back into the backseat of the Bentley. “Looks like we’re headed to the estate, Michael,” I tell my driver. “Very good, sir. I’m assuming we’re in a hurry?” “Aren’t we always?” I catch his grin in the rearview mirror. “Of course.” Midday traffic is thankfully lighter than normal, and I cruise through the e-mails piled up in my in-box before I read through the top stories reporting on my impassioned opening remarks at Investor Day. JUSTIN KARAS: EXECUTIVE IN LOVE. THIS TIME IT’S FOR REAL, LADIES. This morning at Karas International’s annual Investor Day, Justin Karas publicly announced that his acquisition of Homegrown Records was an impulsive move fueled by his feelings for his new bride. He claims that allegations of self-dealing and breach of fiduciary duty leveled in a shareholder derivative suit filed by the executive’s own uncle are baseless given the company’s portfolio of holdings. Further, Karas claims that a purchase of Homegrown by Karas International would have been detrimental to the health of the company and the best interest of its shareholders, given Homegrown’s precarious financial situation. Homegrown, which has been hemorrhaging money since . . . I skim the rest of the article and several others like it, but it seems that the court of public opinion is indeed turning in my favor. Now, if I can get my uncle to take my offer and sell his shares in Karas International, then this problem will be solved and I can move on to taking Selena back to Vegas, and if I have my way, on a real honeymoon. I think she’d enjoy Europe after she gets her next record cut. The beauty of my solution of having my uncle sell his shares is simple—he can’t maintain his shareholder derivative suit if he’s no longer a shareholder. Clean and elegant. Even my lawyers would be proud.

By the time we pull up to the tall, ornate iron gates of the sprawling Westchester estate that was arguably my childhood home, I have my entire speech planned. The gate slides open immediately, and Michael drives through. A blanket of crisp white snow blankets what I know is a manicured lawn with perfect shrubbery. It has never been graced by a swing set. Tag has never been played here. The ornamental trees have never been climbed. Instead, Greer actually had tea parties, archery lessons, cotillion training, and etiquette instruction. Nine days out of ten, I was banished to my room when I was home, but sneaked out and stole books from the library on economics, finance, philosophy, and anything else that I thought could help me learn enough to make more money than my uncle. I studied him. Mimicked his moves in the foreign exchange markets. Cashed in and got out to invest in business with people and assets instead of numbers and paper. I took my company public and made billions. And then he came and bought chunks of my stock, and his ownership of a piece of my company was eating away at the rest of it like a cancer. It’s time for him to be excised. I won’t stand for it any longer. I built my empire with my own sweat, guts, and determination, and I defend what’s mine. My uncle has forgotten that I am just as ruthless as he is. I learned from his example, after all. His reminder will be fierce and swift. Michael slows to a stop in the circular drive of the ten-thousand-square-foot Georgian-style mansion. “I won’t be long,” I say, reaching for the door handle and pushing it open. “Yes, sir.” I make my way to the front door, and it swings open wide before I reach it. “Elisabetta, it’s good to see you again.” The housekeeper, who has served my aunt and uncle in near silence for as long as I can remember, nods. “This way, Mr. Justin.” She leads me to my uncle’s study and shuts the door behind me with a quiet click. Damon is seated in an oversized antique leather chair that looks like it held a Russian tsar. Knowing Damon, it probably did. The Louis XIV desk is the size of a pool table, and the top is spotless, but for a sleek laptop on a leather blotter and a single Mont Blanc pen. “Figured you’d show up. It’s always good to be proven right.” His eyes are narrowed on me, and his tone clearly says he’s not pleased with my presence. “Damon.” “Justin.” “I don’t expect you to offer me a seat. I always enjoy being proven right as well.” His mouth twists into a mockery of a smile. “I don’t know what you think coming here is going to accomplish, but you might as well say what you’ve got to say and get out. Know in advance that you’re wasting my time.” I imagine that my own smile is just as sardonic as his. I step closer and lower myself into one of his chairs for the sole purpose of knowing that it pisses him off. I enjoy towering over him, but I enjoy pissing him off more. His scowl gratifies every part of me. “I came to end this, because quite frankly, Damon, you’re wasting my time, and I’m fucking sick of it. I’ve got better things to do than dicking around with all this petty activist shareholder bullshit, and so do you. We both know it. You’ve hated me since I was a kid; I don’t particularly care why. But we’re both adults, and we’re both businessmen. So how about we talk in terms that we both understand and respect—money. I want your shares. What’s it going to take to get you out of my company and out of my fucking life?” Damon’s eyes, dark like my own, harden even more, but there’s something else there that I can’t identify. I’m reminded of Cannon’s comment because in this moment, my uncle looks more than his normal shrewd and cutting self. “You want my shares? You can have them.” He sits forward, pressing his palms on the desk, and stands halfway out of his chair. “All you have to do is change your fucking last name and take it off your goddamn company.” What the fuck? His request rings in my head, and my brain spins to find a motive or logic behind his words. He’s fucking crazy. “What the hell are you talking about, old man?” My words come out low and harsh. Damon pushes away from the desk and stands tall. He’s six foot one, which means I still top him by two inches. Feeling the need to establish dominance once again, I rise as well. His face has morphed into the most twisted expression of perverted pleasure I’ve ever beheld as he tilts his head and studies me. “You don’t deserve that name. You never fucking did. Your whore of a mother got it for you by seducing my little brother. She ruined his fucking life. Killed him.” I suck in a breath but my lungs are burning, as if all the oxygen in this room couldn’t satisfy them. What is he saying? “Explain yourself before I fucking beat it out of you.” The evil light of perverse pleasure burns in his eyes. “You’ve never wondered why Greer actually looks Greek and you don’t? Oh, you’ve got Mediterranean heritage, but it didn’t come from this family.” Everything inside me goes cold. I become intrinsically aware of every unconscious function of my body. Every tha-thunk of my heart. The whoosh of blood through my ears. Each blink of my eyes. Every shallow, indrawn breath and shaky exhalation. The sensation of my stomach on the floor at my feet.

“What the fuck are you saying?” I roar. Visions of my father—my swarthy, very Greek father—filter through my brain. My mother was a brunette as well. I always assumed I took after her more than him, but my looks never raised suspicion. “Don’t you get it, Justin? The only reason you weren’t born a fucking bastard is because your mother seduced my brother into marrying her before you were born. She got knocked up by a married man, and her family threw her out. My brother was a sucker. A good kid. A fucking junior in college. He was going to do great things—join me in the business. But he met her, and he wouldn’t listen. They got married six weeks later without telling anyone. When we found out and tried to talk him into annulling it, he dug in his heels. Joined that damn church and moved out of the city. Five years later, they ended up in Papua fucking New Guinea, and we all know how that ended. She as good as killed him herself. He never would’ve been there if not for her.” His words twist in a riot in my head, and I’m trying to make sense of them, but it sounds like complete fiction. It can’t be true. “You’re telling me that David Karas was not my biological father.” Damon is stone-faced. “No. He wasn’t.” My father was not my father. The realization pounds into my brain over and over. I turn and pace toward the door. Several beats later, I gather myself and face him again. “But he’s Greer’s father, because she was born in Papua New Guinea.” “Unless your whore mother—” I bolt across the room and my hand is at his throat, slamming him against the wall. “Shut your fucking mouth.” “Get your hands off me,” he forces out through the chokehold. “Tell me who my father is.” “Let me go.” “I said—” I wrap my fingers tighter around his throat. “Tell me who my fucking father is. You have to know.” Damon’s face is turning purple, but he snarls out, “A capo in La Casa Nostra.” I release him, and he stumbles back into the wall. What the fuck? The Mafia? “You’re lying.” “No reason to lie.” I lift my hand to my face as I try to let it sink in. “You have proof?” He nods. “DNA test. Pulled strings when you were a kid.” The man either has bigger balls than I could have ever suspected—or he’s stupid. “How did you not end up dead?” Damon tries to chuckle, but it comes out as a grunt. He rubs his throat. “I know people.” “Well, you can go fuck yourself. This stays between us. I’m not changing my name. You take that request and shove it up your ass.” “Then get ready to lose your entire company. I will drag you through court and destroy your reputation by dissecting every move you’ve ever made. I’ll be so far up your ass, you’ll taste me with every breath.” I have no doubt that he will attempt everything he’s saying. The crazy light in his eyes has settled over the expression on his face, and it’s clear that logic has fled his mind completely. “You’re going to cost yourself everything. You won’t walk away clean from this.” “I don’t care,” he roars. “I’m going to be a thorn in your side for the rest of your fucking life, like you’ve been a thorn in mine!” My hands curl into fists, and I ask the question burning within me. “Why? And if all you want from me is to change my name, why wait until now? Why not earlier?” Damon’s face twists into a sneer. “Every time I miss my brother—his birthday, our annual fishing trip, the World fucking Series, every time I see your goddamn picture in the paper, it makes me sick. If you didn’t exist, I’d still have him. It would be a fair trade, in my mind. And since I can’t have him back, it gives me some small measure of satisfaction to know that I can make you even a fraction as miserable as I am for losing him.” I squeeze my eyes shut for a beat as a wave of grief hits me. Because the man that my uncle still mourns is one I miss just as much, and had even fewer years with. “There’s something so fucked up about that, I don’t even know where to begin. You need help.” He chuckles humorlessly. “No one can bring him back. And now you’ve proven that blood will always tell. Your mother was trash, and now you’ve married trash. You’ve tarnished the family name with your stunt, and I’m done sharing it with you. I won’t stop until I win.” His last statement is a vow, and I know that all the words in the world won’t change his mind. The man has been buried in the grief of his loss for so many years, it seems to have twisted his mind. So I don’t respond to his dig as I cross the room and rip the door open. My time will be better spent developing a new strategy now that I know what I’m facing. My eyes have reduced to tunnel vision, and I barely notice Elisabetta wringing her hands as I stride for the entrance.

Sliding in the backseat of the Bentley, I tell Michael, “Let’s go home. And hurry.” Because I sure as fuck didn’t get the answers I came for. No, I got my world rocked, and a completely new identity. Justin enters the penthouse, and it doesn’t take a genius to know immediately that something is very, very wrong. “Justin?” His hair is wild. His eyes are wild. His entire demeanor is wild. I’ve never seen him like this, and it sets my stomach on a high-speed churn. “What happened? Is it bad? He didn’t take your deal?” He walks past me to the window and presses a hand to the glass. His forehead follows next. “My father wasn’t my father.” His words are so quiet, I can barely make them out. “What?” I whisper. “My mother was pregnant when they met.” A lifetime of not knowing who my father is has had a massive impact on me, but just learning it? I can’t imagine how much it would throw a person’s world off its axis. “Oh my God. Do you know who . . . ?” “Not exactly.” I press both hands to my face before rubbing upward and dragging them through my hair. Holy. Crap. I cross to his side, wanting nothing more than to offer what little comfort I may be able to. His slumped shoulders look like they’re carrying the weight of the world. “But Damon did tell me he was married, and he was in the Mafia.” “What!” I don’t mean to yell, but if ever there was a time to yell, I think this qualifies. Justin pushes off the glass and turns to me. “Yeah. Apparently I’m half Sicilian and not half Greek.” I study him. “I guess I can see it. But holy shit, Justin. Holy shit. You can’t make this shit up. I mean, holy shit.” The edges of his lips curl up in the tiniest hint of a smile, and incredibly, he bursts into a laugh. “Fuck me, I know. Damon said he was a capo, and that was before I was born. He’s probably dead or in prison now. But Jesus fucking Christ. I went to buy back stock in my own company, not a place in the Five Families.” My eyes feel like they may bug out of my head. I’m sure it’s not an attractive look on me, but I can’t help it. This is so freaking unbelievable. “This is like real Godfather-type shit, isn’t it?” Justin shakes his head. “It changes nothing. I’m still exactly the same man. I’m a product of my experiences. The source of my DNA doesn’t change me. And I’m sure as shit not changing my last name.” “Why would you change your last name?” I’m totally confused now. “That was Damon’s price to leave me—to leave us—alone.” “What an arrogant asshole!” “Calm down, baby,” Justin says, reaching for my hand. I shake him off. “Fuck calming down. I’m about to go backwoods on his ass. I like my new last name. I may not be using it onstage, but I’m sure as hell not giving it up now.” Now Justin’s smile threatens to split his face wide. “You are an amazing woman. If anyone had told me that I’d be smiling this soon after having the foundation of my entire existence rocked, I would’ve told them they were insane. Because I remember, with startling clarity, you telling me that I was under no circumstances to call you Mrs. Justin Karas again, or I’d be at risk of being immortalized in a song about a nutless wonder.” “You do listen.” I’m grinning now. “And that was purely a matter of your this is my woman, and I own her like property tone at the time that I took exception to. It had nothing to do with your name.” Justin grabs me and hauls me against his chest. I swear I can feel the tension leave his body as soon as it connects with mine. “This is what I needed. You. In my arms. God, now I’m really tempted to consider Cannon’s suggestion about taking a hit out on Damon.” I crane my neck back and look up at him. “That’s the Mafioso blood in you talking now, baby. I like it.” “Well, right now I just want to forget this entire morning.” His lips descend on mine, and our mouths meet and devour each other. My tongue finds his and tangles, tastes, and teases. I wrap my arms around his neck and pull myself off my feet before twining my legs about his waist. Justin cradles my ass in both hands and heads for the bedroom. We’re two steps from the door before a knock interrupts us. I pull back, but Justin says, “Ignore it.” “We can’t ignore it. You know it’s Cannon, and if he left the Investor Day festivities, it’s got to be important.” “You’re more important.” I wiggle out of his hold and shimmy down his body, stopping to look down at the tent he’s sporting in his suit pants. “How about I get the door?” Justin shoves a hand through his hair. “Fine,” he says, scowling. “But tell him he’s an asshole for interrupting.” “I will.” He’s shaking his head as I turn away and head to the door. I’m still laughing when I pull it open. I stop laughing, because it’s not Cannon. I have to stop and smooth my hair because I think I’m about to meet my new sister-in-law.