#//Had to redo this because it kept getting reblogged by people I do not know

[crimsononiarataki]

I finally decided to post this. By liking this post you're giving me various permissions and they go both ways.

I can send/spam you with memes/asks whenever. (You don't need to answer everything don't worry!)

I can message you at any time regardless of the time about our muses and any ideas I've come up with for them.

I'm allowed to make edits/aesthetics/art for our muses friend/relationship.

Message you for plotting whenever I think of something.

Come up with a billion AUs or situations for our muses to go through together.

All I ask is that we're mutuals (or I follow you & your main/hub blog if you're a sideblog) and that you don't pressure me for responses to asks/memes/threads. Adding my url so only I can reblog this? @crimsononiarataki more likely than you think.

[thyme-in-a-bubble]

sunflower, chapter sixteen

A/N: this chapter is a lot, I highly recommend thinking about reading this at the best time for you or just skipping it all together. Take care of yourself, judge if this is the chapter for you ♡ 

summary: to say that the art gallery went worse than expected is a bit of an understatement…

warnings:  TW ableism, use of the R slur, references to childhood trauma, attending an art show (written by someone who is not a professional artist, so it’s probably not accurate at all), anxiety, crying, meltdown/shutdown, going nonverbal, (it has a comforting end, just fyi) (and if I forgot any warnings, please let me know! I don’t want to jump scare anyone.) 

word count: 2814

∼ gentle reminder that feedback, but especially reblogs are the way you support writers on here ∽

masterlist | join my taglist

previous chapter - series masterlist - next chapter

You kept on having to redo your eyeliner because your hands wouldn’t stop shaking. But finally, after maybe 4 tries, it turned out looking somewhat passable. 

Taking a step back to look at the final product, you tugged your hair behind both ears. Adjusting the straps of your red dress, you smoothed your hands down the silky fabric. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d been this dressed up. It felt both kinda fun but also extremely unnatural. 

Turning around, you exited the bathroom and called out with a loud exhale, “okay, I’m ready.”

Stopping in the doorway of the bedroom, you saw Spencer look up from his book, eyes immediately growing wide. The expression made you slightly worried, maybe your dress was see-through or something and you just hadn’t noticed, so you asked, hands instantly shooting to cover yourself up a bit, “what? Is something wrong with it?”

“No, no, no, no,” he rushed out, “you just-… you look amazing,” relaxing and letting your hands fall down to each side of your body, “not that you don’t always look amazing, my opinion of the way you look doesn’t change by what you’re wearing, it’s just-,” he rambled, but you cut him off.

“Thank you.”

Closing the book and setting it down, he stood up. “You sure you’re ready? We can take a little extra time before we go.”

“No, I don’t think I’m magically gonna get more ready than I already am,” you shook your head, “thank you though.”

Holding onto each other’s hands, you headed down to Spencer’s car, yes, he apparently had a car, that was news to you. He didn’t drive it often, but he did in fact own a car. 

The ride there was quiet and full of nerves. Spencer kept glancing over at you, keeping a close eye on how you were. You fiddled with the edge of your skirt, folding and twisting it. Your head maintained low the entire time, so once the car stopped it came as somewhat of a surprise to you. Not daring to look out the window, you just blinked over at Spencer as he removed the keys. 

“It’s still not too late to go home,” he laid his hand on top of yours.

“I know, it’s okay, I can do this, I just- need a moment,” you grabbed a hold of his hand and focused on it.

“Take all the time you need.”

After a thorough dance of your fingers over all of the veins that littered his hand, you took a deep breath and nodded, “okay, let’s go.”

Out of the car and onto the street you went. The car was parked fairly close to the gallery, so the walk wasn’t too long. Once you reached the door, Spencer looked down at you for confirmation one last time before opening it.

The wall of sound and life that hit you at once made you dizzy. Switching to linking your arm with Spencer’s for the extra support, you walked in. There were loud music and people everywhere. A server walked by with a tray, and you immediately snatched up a glass of champagne. 

Placing a hand over your arm, he suggested, “how about we try and find Stevie?” humming in agreement, you downed half the glass, the carbonation made your eyes water. 

Spotting them was easy enough since they were wearing a long colourful dress that stood out against all of the others. Beaming as they saw you, they planted a big smooch on your cheek, “you’re here! Hi!”

Having never officially met Spencer in person, they turned to him and said, “and you are just as cute as she told me. It’s nice to finally meet you,” they stuck out their hand, “I hope you’re feeling a bit better after that drama.”

“I am, thanks to Y/n, she’s been the best nurse-, um, I’m sorry, I don’t really shake hands.”

“Oh, that’s totally fine, I’m sorry, it’s just a habit.”

A small man then rushed over to whisper something in Stevie’s ear, and they quickly added, “um, I’m just gonna go take care of this real quick, just relax, I’ve got everything under control, I’ll be right back,” and with that, they were whooshed away. 

Following their frame until they disappeared from your vision, you then let it fall down to focus on your shoes. 

“Hey, how about we look around a bit? I know I’ve already seen all of the paintings in here, but I would love a refresher from the artist herself,” Spencer asked quietly in your ear.

Fighting the small smile it brought to your lip, “Spencer, you have an eidetic memory, I don’t think you need a refresher.”

“I didn’t say a needed one, just that I would like one,” he smiled, “I don’t know, it might be a nice thing for you to focus on.”

“Yeah, thank you, it would actually,” you swallowed down the last of your champagne and put it on a nearby table.

“Why don’t we start with that one?” he nodded to somewhere off behind you.

Turning to decipher which one he meant, you shot him a curious glance.

Smiling he walked you in front of the one in question and looked down at you.

“Oh,” you breathed out, feeling a warmth seep through you, “It’s called a gift from my therapist and is one of my personal favourites. Not because I think turned out in some extraordinary way, but because of the memories attached to it,” looking up at him, “it’s the one I painted the day I met you.”

“Yeah, I remember seeing you, arms full of sunflowers,” he reminisced, studying the warm strokes of paint, “you looked like the walking personification of light. I quite literally lost my breath,” he then looked back at you, “still do.”

You were about to pull on his tie so that you could give him a kiss, but a booming voice caught your ears and sent a shiver down your spine.

“-oh, yes, that little thing? She’d be nothing without me, you see.”

The sound made hundreds of repressed memories start to resurface, trying their best to see the light of day. Your heartbeat quickly turned into a hummingbird and your breathing followed suit.

Alarm was written all over Spencer’s face as he lowered himself a bit and held on to you, “what’s wrong?”

All you could do was stand there, frozen, and wildly stare into his eyes.

Coming around the corner, surrounded by a group of people, the balding man caught sight of you, “oh, you are here, what a surprise!”

Turning around, Spencer kept holding onto you in a protective manner. Fuck. Why on earth was he here? How did he find out about it? Why the fuck was he here?

“I wasn’t aware that was something you could be capable of. And you made a friend, or is he just a nurse or something?”

When Spencer noticed that you weren’t answering, he quipped up himself, “no, I’m her boyfriend-“

Cutting him off, he bellowed, “boyfriend? Yeah right. Sir, you don’t have to feel sorry for this little girl. Why don’t you go out and find a real woman? We all know my niece doesn’t meet those requirements.” 

“Excuse me?”

“Or is it because you have some fetish for that sort of thing? You like them slow, huh?”

Spencer didn’t even know how to answer that, just stood there, tight-lipped and completely gobsmacked. Even if he knew exactly what to say, he didn’t get the chance, your uncle Richard was like a tornado.

“And just where is my thanks? Did I get an invitation? No! Me! I am the only reason you somewhat resemble an ounce of someone passable. If it wasn’t for me, you would have been nothing, no one. I took you two in out of the good of my own heart and what do I get? Not a single thing. Tell me, do I have to put you over my knee again, right here in front of all of these people for your retarded little brain to understand?”

Clutching onto one of your hands, he stepped in front of you and roared, “how fucking dare you say something like that?”

“I’ll say whatever I want, boy,” Richard spat out, “and it isn’t you I’m talking to, it’s Y/n,” catching your eye, he laughed, “oh, you can’t speak, huh? Can’t fucking do anything, you useless little thing.”

Tears were streaming down your face, and you felt like you were gonna pass out. Seeing Spencer clench his other fist, you feared that he was about to punch him, but before you could find out, Stevie came rushing in between the two men.

“Okay, alright, Richard, back off,” they hissed, then turned to Spencer, “I am aware that you are a big scary FBI man, but this isn’t your problem. Please take my sister home, take care of her and let me take care of this,” they said sternly and then turned back to their uncle.

“Well, if it isn’t Stevie.”

“Richard, I greatly advise you to stop talking immediately,” they said, trying to sound calm, almost as if they were talking to a small brat.

“No, no, you don’t get to tell me what to do, I’m-“

“No! you don’t get to talk to anyone in that way and especially my little sister. I am well aware of the fiend you are, but just because you sadly have these terrible opinions doesn’t mean you get to share them-“

You didn’t get to hear any more of Stevie’s rant as Spencer had ushered you out and closed the door behind you. You didn’t even register that you’d moved until you were out on the street again. Holding a tight grip on you, helping you to the car, he made sure you didn’t lose your balance. Once you reached it, he opened the car door for you and gently helped you sit down, moving you almost like a doll. Quietly closing it behind you, he soon entered on the driver’s side. Grabbing a hold of both your hands, he commented, “god, you’re freezing,” then shrugged off his suit jacket and enveloped you in it, “here.”

Trying his best to catch your glossed-over eyes with his, he promised, “20 minutes, and then we’ll be home, okay?”

You tried to answer him, to nod, anything, but you couldn’t. Just sat there, tensing and hyperventilating. It only got a little better during the ride home, or your breathing did, ever so slightly, but your body was still not getting the message that the danger was over. 

When you returned home, the walk up the stairs was so slow that a snail could have won the raise. Spencer didn’t seem to mind the pace, he didn’t say anything either, just stood there, purposely making his own breathing clear enough for you to hear and try to copy. 

Once you made it inside, you just stood there like a zombie, tears still slowly rolling down your face. Walking over to get a chair from the dinner table, he brought it to you and cautiously sat you down on it. One by one, he took off your pretty shoes, almost making you feel like a reverse Cinderella. 

Your eyes couldn’t focus on anything really. The only thing that seemed somewhat clear was the hardwood floors, the swirls and dots all around it. Keeping your eyes locked on it, he helped you up and out into the bathroom where he promptly sat you down again. 

After a bit of rustling in a cabinet, he came closer to your face with a wet cotton pad. Gently tugging your hair back behind your ears, he whispered, “close your eyes.”

When you did, a few heavy tears rolled down your cheeks.

Even though you knew what he was about to do, you still jumped ever so slightly when you felt the cool cotton swap gently sweep over your face. When he stopped, you fluttered your eyes open again. Looking up at him, mid toothpaste application to your blue toothbrush, he caught your eye and asked gently, “do you want some help?”

Turning your palm up to him as an answer, he gave it to you and watched as you very slowly brushed all of your teeth. In the meantime, he brushed his own, removed the contacts he was wearing, put on his glasses and when you’d finished, he helped you up to spit the excise out into the sink. Laying the toothbrush down, you looked into the mirror to see him standing behind you. Gently running his fingers through your hair before fishing out a hair tie and putting your mane in a low ponytail. 

Catching his eye in the reflection, his lip trembled ever so slightly, “let’s go to bed.”

Nodding just the slightest, you slowly stumbled off to the bedroom, stopping in the middle of the room. Turning to see him, with a glass of water in hand, he swiftly set it down on one of the nightstands. 

Turning to see you just standing there, he inched closer and asked, “can I help you?”

Nodding, you watched him open a drawer and pick out one of his soft t-shirts that you’d grown so fond of sleeping in. Dropping it onto the edge of the bed, he moved to slowly pull down the zipper of your dress. Once it was all the way down, he pushed the straps off your shoulders and let it drop to the floor. 

The neckline hadn’t lent itself to being able to wear a bra with it, so you were now left in just your underwear. Normally he would have a very different reaction when seeing you this exposed, but he didn’t for a second look at you in that way. 

Picking up the shirt, he cautiously stretched it out so that it could easily slip over your head. Fishing your arms through, he lastly pulled it down to cover you completely. 

With both of his hands in yours, he helped you to sit down on the edge of the mattress. Not noticing before that he had also procured this item, he conjured a pair of thick socks and kneeled down in front of you. 

Slowly, he put them on your cold feet, and then looked up at you with glossy eyes. He was still in his suit, or most of it at least. A few of his waves had fallen over his eye, so you gently pushed it out of the way. As you did, you saw him exhale shakily, trying his best to keep it together. 

You wanted to tell him that it was okay, he had every right to feel everything as well. You wanted to tell him how sorry you were and just how much you loved him, but when you opened your lips, nothing came out. 

Holding onto his cheek, you tried over and over again, but with no success. A few fresh tears rolled down your face as he muttered, “it’s okay, it’s okay. I know,” seeing a few tears escape his eyes as well, he placed his palm above your hand on his cheek, he continued, “I know, I know. I love you so much.”

Squeezing your eyes shut you nodded hard as if to say that you loved him too. 

His voice was small and shaky, the emotion ringing clear, “I’m so sorry that he said that,” running his hand down your arm, he made you look at him as he told you, “you are not useless, you hear me? You are the strongest, bravest, most remarkable woman I’ve ever met. I promise you, that I will do everything in my power, for the rest of my life to make sure that you will never run into him again and that you never forget just how wrong he is.”

Before he could say anything more, you slumped down on the floor and pulled him into a tight hug. Feeling his body shake as he let go, he kept on whispering into your hair that he loved you.

You both just sat there, sobbing in each other’s arms for a good 10 minutes. You were so exhausted that you almost fell asleep right then and there.

Like a ragdoll, Spencer picked you up and helped you to bed. Tugging you in, his eyes didn’t leave your half-open ones as he peeled off the remanding of his suit, not caring where the pieces fell. 

Crawling in behind you, you immediately seized his arm and wrapped it around you, pulling him as close to you as possible. 

As you drifted off to sleep, you kept on hearing his sporadic love confessions whispered in your ear and every time until you fell asleep, you’d give his arm a light squeeze in return.

next chapter

© 2022 thyme-in-a-bubble 

[inprogresspokemon]

FAQ

About Me

Hey there, you can call me IPP (In-Progress Pokemon) or Jae. Any pronoun (he/she/they) is fine. I started this blog in late October 2014 and it has become a passion project for me, that will possibly never end because TPC keeps adding new Pokemon.

My first Pokemon game was Red Version and my favorite Pokemon are Swampert and Noivern. Out of the Gen 9 Starters I am currently team Fuecoco.

I have a pet Blue Tongue Skink named Burrito (he is a good, chubby boy).

What does In-Progress Pokemon mean?/What are these?

In-Progress Pokemon is my name for the concept of exploring how Pokemon might look if they physically transitioned from one evolutionary stage to another. Basically: if Pokemon grew rather than evolved. The “transitional stages” that I illustrate aren’t meant to be taken as actual additional stages; rather, as a “snap-shot” in time while the Pokemon is growing or transitioning between each evolutionary stage. The flavor text/descriptions help to bridge the evolutionary gaps as well.

I also post other Pokemon-related art, like commissioned Fakemon or my Dual-Type Eeveelutions.

When do you update/post new art?

My upload schedule for new art is every Monday and Thursday, 2:00pm EST. They’re reblogged in the evening at 8:00pm EST, and again on Sunday.

I try to always have something new to post for those days, but occasionally have to skip updates when I didn’t have enough time to finish something. I reblog older art at 2pm and 4pm on other days - they’re tagged as “old art” and “IPPreblog” if you want to blacklist them.

New art only view is here.

If they’re not meant to be new stages, why are they named? Can I suggest a name?

Originally I didn’t name them, but after time people began to suggest names, and it’s turned into something I do regularly now. When I post a new Pokemon line, people suggest names for the transitional stages and after a while I’ll look through the suggested names and pick the one I think fit best (based on origin, existing name scheme, etc) - I don’t come up with the names myself.

You’re welcome to suggest a name by reblogging, commenting, or messaging me. When the time comes I’ll make a post with all the suggestions, and I’ll tag you if I go with your name or a name you’ve seconded or showed support for.

If you decide to suggest a name, please include a brief breakdown of your suggestion inspirations (ie: Charmander is a combination of char + salamander).

Have you done [X] Pokemon?

At this point... probably! If you’re on mobile, you can try the search function or look up any Pokemon using my mobile index.

If you’re on desktop, I recommend my sprited Pokemon Index.

Both are kept up-to-date.

How’s your progress going?

They keep introducing new Pokemon, but I’m getting pretty close. As of Early 2022, only a few Pokemon lines are left pre-PLA, and now I have some new Hisuian Pokemon added to the plate that I’m quickly getting to.

What’s up with the redos?

When I started in 2014 I had little to no digital art experience, and a lot of my older art shows this. I’m in the process of redoing older lines and either updating their existing design in my current style, or redoing the design and concept completely. I dislike having my older (imo bad) art out there, so redos is a priority for me, although I know it’s not as interesting for my followers so I try to space them out. I also tend to do redos when I don’t have the time or motivation for anything else. 

I post redo compilations periodically if you want to see a comparison.

Are you okay with fanart?

I absolutely love fanart, it makes my day and fills me with joy. Please tag me if you post it so I can see and reblog your art!!

Can I use your Fakemon...

...as my profile picture? Yes - please just credit me if anyone asks about it.

...in my fanfiction? Yes - please credit me somewhere in the notes (etc.) if your fanfiction is posted publicly. Bonus points if you link to the original post for the fakemon you’re using.

...to make an OC? Yes - please credit me for the base design/species when your OC is first posted, but you don’t need to keep including credit every time going forward. And if anyone asks, please credit me.

...in my Youtube video? As a general rule, I’m fine with that so long as I’m credited and linked to in the description, but I prefer if you ask me first if you plan on my work being a large part of your video. Using a single image here or there is fine as long as I’m credited.

...in my fangame? Sorry, but I’m not allowing my fakemon in fangames or rom hacks at this time.

All that said, I can’t grant permission for Fakemon that were commissioned and belong to the commissioner, although I’m always willing to try reaching out to the commissioner and ask permission on your behalf. It will always say on my posts if a Fakemon was commissioned and belongs to someone else.

What about Mega Pokemon?

Yes, I’m doing those too.

What about Gigantamax Pokemon?

As of now, I’m not planning on doing them. They’re large, time-consuming, and I don’t really like them. I may do them in the future once I’ve completed the main lines and Megas, but no promises.

Commissions?

Yes, I take commissions, though I close them when I have too many commissioned queued or if my IRL is very busy. The pinned post on the top of my blog shows my commission status.

I’m in the process of revamping my commission info page to have images and be more up-to-date, but my old page is here.

I mainly do Pokemon-related commissions, but I do take others, I just don’t post them here. If you’re looking for a non-Pokemon related commission, just ask!

I accept payment only once I’m able to start to your commission and do my business through PayPal invoices, which you can pay with a PayPal account if you have one, or a credit or debit card if you do not.

Depending on what you’re looking to commission, we can work as collaboratively as you like. Some people just want me to make a certain thing and like being surprised with the final result, some people have a firm vision and want to be able to give feedback during the designing process and make changes, some people fall somewhere in the middle. Whatever you prefer is fine.

Social Media:

Email IPPcommissions@gmail.com (commissions)

           inprogresspokemon@gmail.com (other)

Instagram @inprogresspokemon

Facebook In-Progress Pokemon

DeviantArt InProgressPokemon

Twitter @Inprogresspokes

I am only active on Tumblr these days, but I plan to return to DeviantArt and Instagram sometime soon.

Can I submit/ask/chat with you about something? 

Yes, here is my submissions page, and here is my asks page.

And you can always send me a chat message, though I get a lot of them and can’t always respond right away.

Did you get my message? Why haven’t you responded yet?

Sorry, sometimes it takes me a while to get to messages. I also try to space them out so I’m not filling the blog with them. It’s never personal. If I never responded to your message, or it’s been weeks, it’s possible I never got it, or more likely, it has gotten buried under other asks before I was able to respond. If you need to hear from me about something, you can send me a chat message or resend your ask.

I don’t want to clutter people’s dashboards, so I tend to not respond to a lot of anonymous asks if I feel they don’t require a response, but I read them and I especially appreciate the kind words that some of you send my way; they help to keep my spirits up! If you want to send me and ask and prefer a private response, feel free to put (private) at the end of your non-anon message and I will respond privately.

What program do you use?:

I use Paint Tool SAI for the sketch, line art, and coloring, and Photoshop CC for the text/editing/backgrounds.

My general settings info is here.

Tagging, ie: I don’t want to see [X] or I want to find [X]:

I tag everything. You can search for Pokemon by name, type, generation, region, as well as for starter Pokemon and Eeveelutions. You can also blacklist certain things you aren’t interested in seeing on your dashboard.

Other tags:

IPPasks - my ask tag

IPPnews/IPPupdates - news and updates for the blog

IPPnames/name suggestions - for reblogs where a Pokemon is named

IPPreblog/reblog/old art - for reblogs of old art, for any reason

IPPdiscussions - longer discussions or explorations of a topic

IPPdoodles - for random Pokemon sketches and doodles

IPPfanart - my fanart tag!

dual types - posts about the Dual-Type Eeveelutions

baby version - Pokemon lines that have a bonus baby form

[X] bothers me, can you tag it?

Yes - if seeing or reading something bothers you, please let me know and I will do my best to tag it for you going forward.

[abarbaricyalp]

Hand holding 37

37) not realizing they’re holding hands till someone points it out

I assumed SamBucky. If not, just let me know!

Reblogging with the AO3 link ASAP so hopefully it'll stay in the tag this time.

i wanna hold your hand

Bucky had been in Delacroix for six months when the invitation rolled in. He flipped the heavy, glossy card over in his fingers, stacked the multiple envelopes and smaller cards and pieces of tissue paper together, and then looked at the fancy golden script again.

Albert James Wilson and Stephanie Marie Pujols cordially invite Captain Samuel Thomas Wilson to celebrate their wedding with them on the Third of August Two-Thousand-and-Twenty-Five.

There was more text--RSVP instructions, food preferences, a location--but Bucky’s eyes kept drifting to the scrawled message at the bottom of the invitation next to a quickly drawn shield.

Please bring Sergeant Barnes as your plus one -❤️ Stephanie-

He just about flung the invitation across the kitchen when he heard the door open. “Will you go get the rest of the groceries out of the truck? It’s about to open up and I don’t want to be dragging shit through the rain,” Sam said as he stumbled through the entryway to the kitchen. “Oh, you saw the card, great. You can remember what day it is. They sent a Save-the-Date ages ago but I totally forgot about it.”

Bucky felt a little hollow in the chest as he listened to Sam carry on like it was nothing that someone Bucky didn’t even know asked for him by name. Asked Sam for him. “Uh, who's Albert?” he finally managed to get out through the heavy lump in his throat.

“He’s one of my cousins. One of the babies. I think he’s, like, twenty-six or something? Maybe a little older. Him and Steph have been dating for ages but they took everything really slow. She went to grad school and they always said they weren’t getting married until they were totally graduated and had jobs. And then, you know, the Blip and all.”

Sam set the bags of groceries down on the oven and started to stack cans below the cupboards they went in, fruits by the baskets on the breakfast bar, drinks on the other side of the fridge.

“Right,” Bucky said and tapped the invitation against his metal hand. “Do you think it’s really a good idea for me to go?”

Sam shot him an unamused look. “Listen, you don’t get to invite yourself to the fun parties on the water and then decide that you don’t want to sit through a long ass wedding. Besides, you’ll like the reception. Lots of dancing.”

“Sure, it’s just… I mean, they don’t know me. This is a serious moment and they’re just asking for a stranger to come sit in the audience and watch them...fucking become one under the eyes of God.”

“You’re so Catholic,” Sam snorted and rolled his eyes. “You’re coming with me. I’ll be bored out of my mind if you don’t. Besides, if you don’t go, who’s gonna be the ugly, old one?”

“I hate you,” Bucky sighed.

“I know. Now go get the groceries before the bread gets soaked.”

Bucky had been promised dancing and food. But, while most of the church had cleared out for a local dancehall for the reception, Bucky found himself standing awkwardly by the altar while approximately four million pictures were snapped of the wedding party. Sam, leaning against a beautiful statue that he probably shouldn’t have been leaning against next to Bucky, was the only thing keeping Bucky from royally losing his entire mind.

He hadn’t been in a church basically since DC all those years ago. Who knew about before then. Occasionally, when he’d been on the run, he’d crept into an empty rectory to snag a few minutes of quiet where he could rest his eyes without feeling like someone was staring at him, waiting for a moment of weakness on his part. And, sure, growing up Catholic had put this indelible mark on his soul that reacted to any church, empty or not. A deep longing and belonging that he’d never been able to fully grapple with.

But empty churches where he just wanted to sleep were not the same level of overwhelming that a church in the midst of celebration was. Now, all that longing and belonging was spilling over his ribs and soaking into the rest of his body, alive and hot and so tangible he felt like he could almost reach inside himself and touch it.

He missed this.

He missed the happiness and the family and the love that he could find in the walls of a church, in the midst of a celebration. He missed being able to feel something bigger than himself.

The bride and groom hadn’t stopped smiling and laughing all afternoon, always good sports about redoing a photo or trying a new pose or bringing new people into the same picture they’d taken a thousand times already. They couldn’t take their eyes off of each other, couldn’t let go of hands or waists or cheeks.

God, Bucky missed it.

“Okay, how about something with all of the couples?” the photographer asked. “Mom, dad, get on in there. Any bridesmaids and groomsmen paired up? Alright, you go there. Sirs? Sirs?”

“Yo, Sam!” Albert called out and Bucky looked up sharply from the jostling of people in love with each other and the moment.

“I’m not here with anyone,” Sam called back.

“You’re holding your date’s hand?” the photographer said, clearly unsure of what was before her own eyes now.

Sam and Bucky both looked down at their interlocked fingers, hands pressed between their thighs, and then jumped apart with muttered apologies.

“Uh. We’re not. We’re not.” What a stupid thing to have to say after everyone had just seen them. “We’re not together,” Bucky finally got out.

Stephanie frowned deeply for the first time all afternoon, a scheming furrow appearing between her eyebrows.

“Alright… Well then, is that everyone? Okay, cheese it up hard…”

The pictures continued.

“Sorry again,” Bucky said a while later while he and Sam stood shoulder to shoulder in the church’s small bathroom, both looking at their own reflections while they washed their hands.

“Nah, it’s fine. I probably just kept shifting closer to you,” Sam said and there was a strain in his voice that Bucky couldn’t quite place. He didn’t think he’d heard it before. Not on Sam.

“Sometimes I kind of tune out what that arm’s feeling,” he said. “There’s- a lot of nerve activity, y’know. I didn’t notice I’d grabbed you.”

“It was the moment,” Sam agreed. “We were watching a bunch of other people hold hands and shit.”

“Yeah,” Bucky said. He shook water off of his fingers and then wiped his hands on his slacks. “Can we go eat now?”

“Yeah,” Sam said, nodding quickly. “Let’s get outta here. I’m sure other people are waiting.”

The dancehall was dim, lit up only with white string lights draped over the rafters and around the tables and columns. It smelt heavenly, a mix of well cooked food and an open bar and desserts that Bucky couldn’t even name. Sam grabbed Bucky’s wrist--this time he felt it--and pulled him through the crowds lingering at the dance floor’s edge. He gave as short answers as was possible to stay polite until they got to the food.

Sarah was waiting for them.

“What took you two so long?” she asked. “I’ve had to fend off a dozen people looking for Captain America.”

“You will not believe what happened to us at the church,” Sam said, loading up a plate with more food than Bucky felt comfortable taking. It was fine because Sam was making Bucky a plate too and they were pretty similar in portion size.

“Oh, yes I will,” Sarah said. “Stephanie told me all about it.”

“What? How did she beat us here? We got in our car first.”

“Why did you two lie to that poor photographer?” Sarah asked.

Bucky looked up with a meringue half in his mouth. “We didn’t? She made the assumption herself.”

“You said you weren’t together,” Sarah clarified. “Why are you playing coy with me?”

“We’re not together,” Sam insisted for the second time that day. Bucky ignored the cinch of his heart and grabbed a brownie to add to Sam’s precarious stack of food.

Sarah brought two fingers up to the bridge of her nose. “Samuel Thomas,” she said and Sam squawked out an indignant sound.

“Don’t say my name like that. You sound just like mom.”

“You’re lucky it’s me and not mom listening to you lie to yourself.”

Sam was about to argue with her, Bucky could tell, when the plate in his hand suddenly tipped. Bucky’s hand shot out to steady it, fingers sliding over Sam’s to hold it still, wait for the food to stop moving before adjusting their hands under it to continue carrying it.

Sarah shot them a very pointed look. “Cass and AJ are holding our table down and Mrs. Reynolds has already said she wants at least two dances from you,” she said to Sam.

“Yes, ma’am,” Sam said, just a little sarcastically. “Come on, Buck. And grab an extra roll. AJ’s gonna take all the good desserts if we don’t distract him.”

Sam did far more dancing than Bucky did. Just about all night, he had someone on his arm, cutting in, or pulling him back to the floor. Between everyone at their table, they cleared the plates Sam had made but Bucky didn’t think Sam had had half of what he wanted. He made sure to collect another plate when he was sure everyone had had a chance to eat and kept it safe at his side, even with AJ curled up in his lap, snoozing against his metal shoulder soundly. True, most kids couldn’t eat while they were asleep but after watching him put away way more carbs and sugar than Bucky thought should be possible, he wasn’t putting anything past the kid.

When Sam managed to drag himself away from all of his fans for the sixth time that night, and when he shot Bucky a curious but pleased glance between AJ and his shoulder, Bucky just said, “Sugar crash,” and pushed the plate of food over to Sam with the arm not currently holding AJ in place.

Possibly, AJ got his appetite from his uncle if the way Sam dug in was anything to go by. “Jesus, man, breathe,” Bucky laughed and passed over the bottle of beer he’d been nursing most of the last hour.

“Thanks. I forgot how much a full night of dancing takes out of you. Not as young as I used to be, y’know,” Sam said and took a long pull from Bucky’s drink.

“You literally moved a boulder off a road yesterday,” Bucky pointed out.

“I only had to do that once and I had the jetpack. I’ll tell you, my feet wish I had the wings about now,” Sam answered. He put away a roll and one of the sweets Bucky didn’t know before finally sitting back a little, forearms rested on the tables. He’d discarded his jacket after the fourth or so dance and at some point he’d rolled up his shirt sleeves to his elbows. That, plus the brown suspenders over his light blue shirt had him looking like a hundred old memories in Bucky’s mind.

“AJ and I filmed you a few times,” Bucky said to distract himself from the sweat cooling on Sam’s forearms. He brought his phone out and left it on the table as it played a video. Sam leaned forward and then laughed.

“Oh, you liked that one, huh?” he asked.

“Nah, that was AJ’s choice. I liked this one,” he said, swiping to the previous video.

“Of course, something more lindy-hop,” Sam said with a nod. “That lady called me every single day after mom died, y’know. She always said it was ‘cause she missed her already and our voices were similar, but I think she was worried about me.”

“Who was this one?” Bucky asked, flipping through a few more clips.

“Oh, shit,” Sam laughed. “I can’t believe you recorded that. We went to the prom together junior year. Her dad hated me. He’d probably hate that this video exists.”

“Captain America couldn’t even clear the bad blood?” Bucky joked.

“Hell no. Prom night, he busted into the living room after the dance thinking he was gonna catch us in some act but we were just watching movies. It was never like that with us, but you couldn't convince him.”

Bucky flipped to another video. “Her son joined up with me but ended up dropping out and going Navy instead. - She was my first boss. - I played baseball with that guy and he came out a few months after we graduated. - I dated her daughter very briefly. - That’s the daughter and the little one is her daughter. - That’s my favorite teacher’s son. He just wanted to say hi from his mom.”

“Hey, what are you looking at?” AJ asked groggily suddenly. He leaned over the table, small hand coming to rest where, once again, Sam and Bucky’s had drifted together on the other side of the phone. This time they couldn’t jump apart.

“Uncle Sam, Uncle Bucky danced with my teacher and she said he had the prettiest eyes she’d ever seen,” Cass shouted as he came bounding back to the table with Sarah in tow behind him. Bucky had seen her dance with a handsome man for three dances in a row so if she cut any new knowing looks at where their hands were being held hostage, he had some retaliation this time.

Bucky finally let Sam drag him out to the middle of the dancefloor just as things were beginning to wind down. Many guests had already left for the evening, catering had cleared out the food, though Sam and AJ really did their part in making sure there was no bread left for them to clean, and the band had packed up and left a local DJ to close out the night.

This time, Bucky was more than aware of his hand sliding into Sam’s, his metal hand settling against Sam’s shoulder, thumb brushing over the strap of his suspenders. Sam’s other hand was warm and welcome against his hip. Bucky couldn’t help but step closer to him as they swayed to the slow song.

“You were really good with all the kids all night,” Sam said. “I saw them dogpile you earlier.”

“Kids like me,” Bucky said with a shrug. “Entertaining them was my job at weddings back when too. All those nights of dancing and I never got to show off at family functions,” he joked.

“You showed off plenty. I think it’s gonna be you Mrs. Reynolds asks for next time someone gets married. Hell, maybe she’ll be marrying you.”

Bucky laughed and shook his head. “Hey, she’s got spirit. I think if we’d gone a few more dances, she might’ve found one I didn’t know.”

“Well, it was a jazz band. Can’t blame you for not keeping up when you didn’t grow up with good music.”

“We had jazz,” Bucky said with a roll of his eyes. “It was nice, getting to see more of your life.”

Sam looked thoughtful for a moment before he nodded. “Yeah, it was nice stepping back in time a little bit, getting to see how everyone’s grown up.”

“You’re so loved here. Not Captain America. Sam Wilson. People adore you.”

Sam ducked his head shyly and Bucky reached up to catch a knuckle under his chin. The music had stopped and their feet must’ve realized it before their brains because they weren’t dancing anymore either.

“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, Sammy,” someone called from across the room. Bucky recognized the groom’s voice. “You haven’t let go of his hand all night. Just kiss him already.”

Sam and Bucky both looked down at their tangled fingers and let out a little laugh. “Well, if it’s what your fans want…” Bucky suggested.

“Shut up, man,” Sam laughed and leaned forward to kiss him.

[btsandvmin]

Regarding long posts

Hi, just an update from me about my content. Recently I made the post  The Vmin awards 2020! which is a very long moment collection of Vmin from 2020. I had a few problems with this post, which has kind of forced me to work differently with making posts from now on.

First the time it took to make it, which was a big problem because Tumblr kept not working and it took much longer than it would have had everything just gone smoothly. Amongst some of the problems: I couldn’t upload photos, sometimes not at all so I had to wait for it to start working again, sometimes because the gifs simply froze and didn’t work in the post, and through most of the post I couldn’t add them directly at their place but had to drag them through the whole post to their position (something that took a lot of time because of the size of the most). I couldn’t always save my work, and I couldn’t always load the full post. Meaning I had to redo the same things a few times until it “stuck” and actually was saved. I had to do this often to not work too much in vain. At some points my spacebar stopped working in tumblr so I had to write in word and then copy into the post. I also have a computer who doesn’t agree with me anymore which just slows things down even more. In short there is just a lot of trouble when making long posts, in particular with a lot of photos, gifs or videos.

Second, the post didn’t show up in the Vmin tag, meaning it didn’t get a lot of exposure. I don’t do this for likes or reblogs of course, but it does make me sad when a post I put a lot of effort into doesn’t even get seen in the tag. I suspect the size of the post could potentially be part of the problem as well, as I know some of you couldn’t even see it without the app crashing. The post had about 150+ pictures and gifs, so it might have been overkill.

Third, I feel like most people don’t have the attention or interest in too long posts and thus it limits how many actually takes the time to go through my longer content. Maybe especially when it is a lot of text. (Like this info dump of a post)

Fourth, I don’t make a lot of gifs myslef, but rather collect them, from various places and in a way that makes it difficult to know the source. And a lot of moments also doesn’t get gifs anymore, as most prefer to post them as videos. Something tumblr sadly is not very compatible with as you can’t add a lot of videos unless they are un Youtube basically. This is yet another problem that makes collecting moments in the way I do in a post like  A Vmin throwback - 2017,  A Vmin throwback - 2018 or  The Vmin awards 2020! more difficult and time consuming.

So, I think I will try my best to not make too long posts (even though I kind of love to make them, and might not be able to contain myself). At least for now when tumblr isn’t working so well. I might try again if I get a better computer and that allows me to work more smoothly.

I am however thinking of posting the part I did manage to finish for the 2019 throwback, and might do that as a sort of part 1. But I can’t promise there will be a part 2. There definitely won’t be one soon considering my difficulties.

I am sorry, but I really want to be able to give you good content at the same time as it isn’t too much of an uphill battle for me. I hope you understand. <3

[bunbun206]

Okay, I think I've got it.

You would be...

DAVID RODRIGUEZ!!

He wasn't on screen a lot, Bhr for the time he was he definitely showed he does what it takes to survive, And if he has to listen to some asshole for a bit to survive he does. But as soon as he gets the chance he'll stomp on those who made him do the embarrassing things he had to do so he could get by. He's a good, Smart kid, But he does what it takes to survive. He also seems to value people more if their kinder to him.

Out of the main four, Your...

STAN!!

Stan has shown he's not afraid to hurt others and steal from them if it means he and hid family will be okay. He'll step on others to get ahead if needed and always kept a clear head. He couldn't get out of bed in the morning some times but I don't think anyone hasn't had a day like thwt. He cares for his friends but doesn't always know how to show it.

Sorry if it's a bit crappy I'm so unreasonably tired right now haha I'll redo it when I have q clear head if you'd like

Please rate the explanation and characters I've given on a scale to 1-10! Don't be afraid to give me a bad score!

My inbox is always open if you have other shows you eant to see who your most like! Though it will take q bit because of how many people reblogged the south park post. I also do dumb things like what fruit you could be or what show in general! I'd also be glad to just do a general scan to show who you seem to be, Or others if you wanna know about them :]

Oh this was really fun! Thank you! I’m not sure if this exactly fit but I do think there are some traits there. 6/10

[rebelwrites]

Chapter Twenty Two: Home Sweet Home - Lola

As this is an original fic it is hard to tag, so I’d really appreciate it is you reblogged and shared with your friends and followers 🖤 and if you reblog with comments I will love you forever

Join The Group Chat Here - If You Want Tagging Manually Let Me Know 🖤

Falling For Red Masterlist

This Months Writing

“For fuck sake stop babying me” I spat, swatting Maddox’s arm away from me as I positioned my good hand on the side of the car door to pull myself up. “I can fucking manage”

“I’m just trying to help” Maddox glared “you have literally been released from hospital sorry for caring”

“I don’t need help” I hissed through the pain as I finally pulled myself out of the car, trying to ignore the pain in my side and my thigh. “I’m fine”

“So fucking stubborn” he laughed as I stuck my middle finger up at him.

“Sit and spin asswipe”

“And she is back now guys” Maddox smirked as he closed the car door behind me.

“I never fucking left” I scoffed rolling my eyes at him as I hobbled into the house. One look around and I was repulsed. “Seriously you lot are a bunch of pigs. Look at the state of this place.”

“We kind of have more important things to worry about than doing the dishes,” Axel said kissing the top of my head. “Now sit your ass down on the sofa and don’t even think about moving”

“But”

“Don’t make me tie you down” he smirked “you need to rest, you are still healing and I don’t particularly fancy redoing your stitches because you don’t listen”

“Fine” I huffed as he helped remove my jacket before settling on the sofa. “Someone make me a decent cup of coffee, it was a crime what they gave me in the hospital”

“You know she is seriously going to milk this situation” Maddox grinned as he sat on the sofa. But that didn’t stop me from grabbing the nearest thing to me, which happened to be an empty coke can, launching it at his head.

“You know I can hear you right?” I laughed but stopped pretty quickly due to the pain shooting through my ribs.

“Don’t make her laugh,” Nix scolded, hitting Maddox round the head, before turning to me holding his palm out to reveal some tablets.

“Do I have to take them?” I pouted.

“Yes” he said sternly “I’m not prepared for you to be skipping your pain killers because let’s face it you are a grumpy fucker when in pain”

“Fine but I expect ice cream later” I glared while taking the tablets before pushing myself up to go for a smoke.

“You are such a child you know” he laughed, shaking his head before he put his arm around my waist, helping me to my feet “where are you going?”

“For a smoke” I said

As I leant against the wall, cigarette hanging from my lips, I checked my phone to find another message from Grayson. I wasn't replying to him so you would think he would get the message but no, at least once a day he texted. All of which I ignored. I didn’t want to talk to him right now.

“Stop pushing him away, Red” Nix said, sitting on the wall in front of me.

“I just don’t want to talk to him Nix” I sighed, shoving my phone back into my pocket. “But at the same time I do, I just don’t know what to do”

“Listen to your heart kiddo” he said smiling softly at me.

“That’s what got me in this mess in the first place” I huffed “I really need to start listening to my head”

“Look I get it, you are scared. You don’t trust people easily and the fact that within a week Grayson had started to chip away at those walls you built years ago is causing you to freak out” Nix said.

I didn’t make any eye contact. I knew he was right, I knew it was just because I was freaking out but I didn’t want to admit to myself how he made me feel. Just like I tried to act strong about everything that had happened for the past couple of weeks. The guys could see straight through my act and I knew it. They all knew that right at this moment I felt like the old me and I hated every moment of it. I knew I couldn’t keep bottling everything up because at some point I would explode, I needed to face the demons that plagued my soul but not today.

Tossing the cigarette butt in the plant pot I hobbled back inside to get a much needed coffee. I couldn’t wait to sleep in my own bed and not an uncomfortable hospital bed.

Soon enough I had drunk my coffee and was snuggled up to Nix on the sofa under my blanket. Nix was basically my big brother so whenever I wasn’t feeling myself I’d gravitate towards him, I didn’t even need to ask if he just knew what I needed. The sensation of him rubbing my back was soothing and I soon drifted off to sleep.

I don’t know how long I had been asleep for but the smell that intoxicated me gently woke me up. I don’t know what it was about his aftershave but it made me feel safe. But I pretended to be asleep, I didn’t want to have to deal with him at the moment.

“How is she doing?” Grayson asked, there was sadness in his voice that made me want to pull him into my arms and just hold him.

“She’s acting like she is fine” Nix sighed as he ran his hand through my hair. “I knew she would though, she doesn’t like showing her true emotions”

That’s it Nix just spill all my secrets why don’t you.

“I’ve been texting her but she’s ignored every single one” Grayson sighed “I shouldn’t be surprised, if be feeling the same if I was in her position”

“She just needs to see you aren’t going anywhere mate” Nix said softly. “If she sees that then it might be a bit easier for her, but you mentioned at the hospital you went through something similar a while back?”

“Yeah and I bottled everything I was feeling up until one day I exploded and actually got arrested” he said “I just don’t want her to do the same thing, I found talking about it really helps”

Wait he went through the same thing? Was that why he kept texting me?

“I was twenty when it happened” he sighed “just tell her that I stopped by and I’m always going to be here if she needs someone to chat to. I might understand better than anyone”

“Will do man, thanks for stopping in” Nix said softly, not wanting to wake me.

As soon as I heard the front door shut, I took a deep breath.

“He’s gone Red, I know you aren’t asleep” Nix laughed tapping my head. “You can’t keep avoiding him”

“Debatable, how did you know I was awake anyway?” I yawned as he helped me to sit up.

“As soon as he walked in the room your nose twitched and you started to smile” he smirked.

“Fuck” I mumbled.

“But you heard what he said, I don’t need to repeat it” he smiled, kissing the top of my head. “Just let him in kiddo”

@chibsytelford @everyhowlmarksthedead @talicat713 @little-diable @band--psycho @mrsmarvelous1995 @pancakeisreading

[champagne-bucky]

The Undoing: Four

Summary: The truth about a past life is unveiled.

Warnings: THIS IS A DARK STORY!! dark! Steve Rogers x reader, kidnapping, non con and dub con (or at least mentions of), dark! Bucky Barnes, Stockholm syndrome, grooming, mentions of pregnancy termination and suicide mentions (for one chapter), possibly more tags to be added!

Notes: Ahhh, so here we are, part 4 and the present time in which this story takes place. I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to get shit done, but I’ve just been so unmotivated and it sucks because I had all these things planned and ughhh procrastination sucks. Anyways enjoy part 4. Please make sure to like, comment, reblog, inbox, and follow for more!! Enjoy :)

PLEASE READ WARNINGS!!

*Present time*

“Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear Sasha. Happy birthday to you,” the small crowd that was Sasha’s family cheered as she blew out her candles.

Finally, her 18th birthday. A day where she is legally considered an adult. A day that her father had promised to grant her the freedoms that she saw the other kids had. A day where she would no longer be sheltered.

“Happy birthday, sweetheart,” her mother came up to the young woman and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Her father followed suit, a side hug and kiss as she worked on cutting the cake.

“I want the first piece,” one shouted.

“I want a really big piece,” said another.

The shouting amongst her siblings didn’t subside until her father quieted them down with the threat of “no cake at all.”

While her mother busied herself in the kitchen, Sasha’s father was helping his youngest children get their slices of cake. Birthdays and holidays were the only times the Rogers’ family got to indulge in sweet treats. Steve had made it clear that his children were to only eat the healthiest of foods, and his doting wife always complied.

A knock on the door caught Sasha’s attention. While the family was in momentary disarray, Sasha was the only one who ended up hearing the faint series of knocks.

Therefore, she wiped her hands of sweet buttercream icing and made her way to the locked door. The knocks continued on even after she told them to wait a minute. A peek through the peephole revealed a stranger. To be fair, everyone was a stranger to the Rogers’ family. No frequent visitors, friends, even family, the Rogers’ only knew each other.

“Daddy, someones at our door,” Steve abandoned the youngest child to meet Sasha at the door.

Steve glanced through the peephole and for a minute it seemed like he saw a ghost. “It can’t be,” Steve swung open the door so fast that Sasha feared she would get knocked out by it.

“Bucky,” Steve looked at the stranger on the other side of the door.  

“Been a while huh?” The man, Bucky, gives a half grin at Sasha’s father.

“Wow,” Bucky turns to Sasha, “she’s all grown up,” Bucky invites himself in, but before he could get halfway past the threshold Steve stops him.

“Why all of a sudden have you turned up?” Steve gives Bucky a look that says “don’t say too much.”

“Because there’s a party going on,” Bucky then turns to Sasha. “Happy birthday sweetheart. My god, look at you,” Bucky looks her up and down. Sasha looked very taken back by the strange man. Who was he and why did he know your father?

Steve cleared his throat, “uhm, Y/N is in the kitchen cutting the cake. Why don’t you stay for some,” Bucky obliged and made his way into the kitchen.

“Dad, who is he?” Steve was quick to dismiss her question by replying that he’d been an old friend that knew him back when Sasha was first born.

Buck had made his way into the small kitchen, nothing had changed since Steve had brought his now wife here. In that kitchen were a bunch of children, some big and some small, all asking for a slice of Sasha’s birthday cake.

And then there was her, the young women that Bucky once knew, now all grown up with a family of her own. Bucky couldn’t help but smile at how pleasant she looked while serving the youngest children slices of their cake. She turned once she felt a presence at the door. A mix of emotions flashed through her eyes for a moment, but then her confused expression turned into a smile. She gladly walked over to the long time friend and greeted him with a huge smile and open arms.

“Bucky, it’s great to see you,” not a hint of sarcasm or an urgent surge of rage coursed this beautiful woman. She was genuinely happy to see the man that ruined her life prematurely.

“You haven’t aged a day since I last saw you,” Bucky smiled as he hugged her back. She looked nice in her freshly ironed dress and brand new heels her husband had demanded she wear around the house at all times.

“Please, come sit down while we have some cake. Kids, get to the dining room now please,” the herd of small children rushed out into the dining room with their sweet treats in hand.

__

Bucky was observant throughout dessert. Upon dodging judgemental and questioning looks from Steve, Bucky got to know more about the rest of the Rogers family.

“Last time I was here you had just had Gwynedd, yes?” Their mother nodded as a carbon copy of Steve Rogers looked up at him with a smile. She was going to be 17 soon, as she mentioned to the family a handful of times about birthday party ideas.

Then there was the third oldest, Max, a short haired, freckly 15 year old who had dreams of becoming an engineer. Reid was approaching 13 years old in the next couple of months, he was adamant on a firetruck themed party seeing as he wanted to be a fireman when he grew up. 11 year old Jocelyn had the same physique as her mother, but her personality was all Steve, she was sassy and always helping out her younger sibling. Last, and probably won’t be the least, was 9 year old Sarah Rogers, named accordingly after Steve’s long departed mother of course, she was the prized baby of the family that no one could touch.

Then there was Sasha, the oldest Rogers. Sasha was 100% her mother, from looks to personality. It was almost like someone hit a copy and paste button on everything Y/N Rogers and stamped it perfectly onto Sasha. Bucky couldn’t believe that the once small baby girl he held in his hands had grown into a beautiful, young woman. Bucky was snapped out of his thoughts when Steve called his name.  

“So, um, Bucky, what plans do you have for the summer?”

“Daddy says we might be able to go to the seashore this summer if we all behave,” Sarah shouted with her mouthful of cake. Her mother scolded her for interrupting Bucky and Steve.

“Well that sounds a lot more exciting than what I’m doing, Sarah. I’ll be fixing up this old house I bought a few blocks over from you guys. I got it for cheap so I want to do some remodeling and maybe sell the place before autumn.”

“Why would you buy a house just to sell it again in a few months?” It was Gwenyd’s turn to interrupt this time.

“It’s called house flipping Gwen, people buy crappy houses and pour all their money into it so they can get stinkn’ rich off the place,” Sasha finally spoke up.

“Sash, remember we don’t use words like that in front of the younger ones,” her mother reminded her before putting her head down and eating the rest of her cake slice.

“You’re very correct Sasha. Think of this as a new hobby of mine, Steve, taking something old and run down and forming it into something new and modern.”

“So what are you going to do to it?” Gwenyd asked.

“Well I'm going to redo the whole structure of the outside, maybe add in a pool and deck area in the backyard. The inside I’m planning on gutting the whole thing and putting in my own personal touches,” the children all ooh’d and ahh’d at the idea.

The wheels in Bucky’s head were turning for a moment. He looked at sweet Sasha and the other kids. He couldn’t just leave them caged up in this house for the summer. He knows Steve. He knows that he’ll keep them locked up inside for fear of one of the children saying something about their unusual situation. He didn’t want to leave Sasha most of all. 18 years old and definitely hasn’t gotten a chance to explore the world. He wanted to help them.

“Say, kids, redoing a big house is a lot of work for one man. How about you guys help me out and I’ll give you some money for your seashore trip,” Reid jumped out of his chair all excited.

“Daddy, Mommy, please please please let us help Bucky. Please!” Steve quieted Reid down.

Their mother kept her head down. She would love for them to get out of the house for a bit, but Steve makes all the rules.

“I’ll have to think about it, Bucky,” Steve said which caused the younger siblings to groan.

“I think it’ll be fun, dad. We get a little bit of work experience, we’ll be kept busy for a couple weeks, and we can make our own money,” Sasha spoke up and Gwenyd was giving her dad a thumbs up to agree with her older sister.

“I said I’ll think about it, girls,” Steve said sternly while finishing off his cake.

Steve couldn’t help but glare at Bucky throughout the rest of dessert. Something just wasn’t right about Bucky’s abrupt visit. Steve’s wife didn’t seem to care much because she enjoyed getting visitors, but Bucky wasn’t a frequent visitor in their home.

Bucky left Steve soon after Gweyndd was born. He stayed around because Steve needed someone to help take care of Sasha while he was busy breaking in his wife. Steve never told Bucky to leave him after that, he would’ve preferred if Bucky stayed around to be in their lives. However, one morning he took off and never came back, he even went as far as breaking all contact with Steve.

Dessert was over and the kids were helping their mother clean up. Steve offered to help, but the kids hopped right to it, cleaning down the table and loading the dishes into the sink. While they were busy, Steve led Bucky into their family room with a couple beers in his hands.

“So, why are you really here?” Bucky laughed.

“Stevie, I just said I was stopping by. Sasha’s 18th birthday is a pretty big deal. No longer a young girl, but a grown woman,” Steve seethed at his response.

“So after all these years of no contact you just decided to show up again after like everything is okay?” Bucky looked at their surroundings to see if anyone was listening. When the coast was cleared he finally spoke up.

“I had the cops on my ass since that first week. That stupid family next door had cameras showing me getting Y/N to come outside with me. Lucky I convinced Sam to pull those traffic cameras and delete the evidence or we both would’ve been caught.”

“The cops were snooping around and you didn’t think to tell me?” Steve heart rate picked up. He did get questioned by the cops one day, but already rehearsed a solid alibi. Who would've guessed that taking that one drama class in high school gave him solid acting skills.

“I had to lay low. I’m pretty sure they tapped my phone and had P.I.’s following me everywhere I went. Once I was cleared of anything I got a new job and skipped town.”

The case went cold after a few years, Steve guessed that they were trying to pin the disappearance on Bucky, but considering Bucky is standing in front of him today it seems he got off.

“So what do they think happened?” Steve whispered.

“A classic runaway case. The family refuses to accept that she’s gone for good. I got to town every now and then and I hear that the parents go looking for her every night on their own. Everyone gave up on them,” Steve let out a breath of relief. He feared that the cops were still after his wife after all this time. It’s refreshing to find out that the case is really over.

“So, you really taking the kids to the beach?” Bucky smirked already knowing Steve’s response.

“They’ve been hounding me all year that they wanted to get out of the house and do something fun. Had to tell them something to get them off my back.”

“When are you gonna break the news to them?”

“Probably a week before I told them we would go. I’m sure Reid or Joce will do something that’ll make me “change my mind”,” Steve smirked. He really couldn’t risk them going out of the house.

“Why don’t they come with me,” Steve laughed.

“I’m serious, Steve. All that time in the house with the kids, how do you and the missus have any “free time”,” Steve rolled his eyes.

“What we do is none of your business. Plus, I don’t want any of these kids to run their mouths like Sasha did,” Bucky asked what he meant by that. Sweet Sasha would sell out her family like that?

Steve explained the whole situation. She took playing house a little too far and took the kids outside to play. Just as bad luck would have it, the neighbors were also outside when they noticed a bunch of unattended children running around and playing. The nosy bastards kept asking Sasha questions. Did you kids just move in? Where are your parents? You’ve been living here how long?

Fucking CPS got involved and wouldn’t let up on the family. Steve’s wife sure as hell got a punishment of a lifetime. She also had to stay in the basement anytime a social worker would have random visits. Couldn’t risk anything.

To get them off their backs, Steve promised that he would enroll all the children in real schools so they would get more social interaction from their age groups. Yeah, that lasted about a month or two until the social workers stopped coming by. Everyone of them got pulled out of school except for Sasha. She enjoyed learning so much and was already making her way into high school.

It took months of convincing her mother to help her out to convince Steve to let her go to high school. Long nights and heated arguments between the couple was giving Steve major migraines. He finally agreed, but only on a string of strict conditions. Luckily, Sasha was already well behaved at this point so he wasn’t too worried about her fucking up again.

“I think it’ll be a good idea to let the kids come with me. They can learn new things and it’ll get them out of your hair. Think of all the time you and Y/N will have. So much time that you could be giving the kids and new brother or sister,” Steve did perk up at that idea. He has been on his wife for a while now about wanting a new baby, they just aren’t getting many opportunities to try with all the kids around.

Steve thought for a moment, “You’ll make sure they won’t get into any trouble right?”

“I’ll watch them like hawks,” Bucky promised as he saw Sasha coming out of the kitchen to head upstairs.

“Hey daddy, I’m gonna go to bed, but I just wanted to say goodnight. Thank you for a great birthday,” Sasha kissed her father’s cheek.

“It was nice meeting you Bucky,” Bucky smiled at her as she walked upstairs.

“You raised her well, Stevie.”

“Fine,” Bucky was surprised.

“Fine what?”

“You can have the kids help you, but don’t get into anything stupid or I’ll have your head,” Steve threatened as the other children started to come in to say goodnight.

“I’ll be here 8 sharp then,” Bucky got up to leave soon after the kids were getting ready for bed.

Bucky had his own planning to do, and he would make sure he would keep Steve’s word.

__

For something that the children were so excited about, they were relieved that helping Bucky out was over.

What they thought was a couple week project turned into the whole summer. A few fights and temper tantrums later and the house was almost done. However, Bucky wouldn’t need their help any longer. Instead, he agreed that he would keep them longer so Steve had a good excuse to say why their trip wasn’t happening this summer. The kids were so upset that their beach trip got canceled, but Bucky made it up to them by buying them ice cream and letting them watch movies all day one day.

Not only did they get endless amounts of ice cream, but they had a new addition to expect in the next 9 months. Yes, their mother got pregnant again with another child. Bucky could tell Sasha was a little upset by this, but the others were thoroughly excited about a new brother or sister joining the family.

The nights got cooler and the days were getting shorter meaning fall was approaching them. Which meant Sasha would finally be able to get back to school. While most kids dreaded going back Sasha didn’t. She loved school, her teachers, classes, and most of all was getting new books. There has never been a kid who enjoyed reading a European World History book more than Sasha Rogers. Also she couldn’t wait to get some peace and quiet away from her brothers and sisters.

“Sash,” Bucky stopped her before she could walk out of his new house.

“Yeah, Buck,” they had grown rather close during this time, almost as if they were long lost friends.

“I got you something. Think of it as a late birthday present,” Bucky pulled out of his back pocket a rectangular device. Sasha had seen them on TV all the time. In fact, she begged for one for so many years, but her father yelled at her to drop it before he got even more angry.

“I’m not supposed to have one of these. Dad will kill me, he’ll kill you,” Bucky laughed and shoved the phone and its box in her hands.

“It’ll be our secret. Hide this in and don’t tell anyone. Don’t tell mom or Gwen, even your friends at school,” Bucky urged her to take it.

“But I can’t pay for it,” Sasha wasn’t allowed to have a job either.

“I’ll take care of everything. Just to make sure we are clear, don’t do anything stupid with this phone. You tell no one about it at all. If I find anything bad on this phone I won’t hesitate to tell your father, understand?” Sasha gulped and shook her head out of fear of what her father would do.

“Uhm, uh, thank you so much Bucky,” Sasha hugged him.

“It’s no problem at all, Sash.”

Now with a phone in her hand and access to contacting her, Bucky had his own plan in motion.

Tags to be added in comments!!

[innathan]

it’s saturday bruv i’m finally here xx

stats:

full name: nathan kwon.

nickname(s): nate.. just nate nothing else.. nathanial would be too chuck bass of u don’t do it ur better than that.

age: 23.

date of birth: june 2nd, 1997.

hometown: phoenix, arizona.

gender: cis male.

religion: agnostic.

sexuality: bisexual.

hair colour: currently what the icon depicts.. but he has a monthly middle school breakdown so it never stays the same for too long.

eye colour: brown.

height: 5'10′‘.

tattoos: none.

piercings: none. look away if u see me reblog pics of him with piercings.. 

bio:

nate had what you would call a seemingly normal upbringing and parents with tedious jobs (accountant & lawyer) that kept them busy and on their own paths. as a result he never exhibited any interests or passion for anything.. he was a bored, lonely child but if you asked his parents he would be labeled as ‘independent’. they did, however, start to worry later on, when he didn’t display excellence in school or any area of expertise. he even ended up in trouble a lot of the time; skipping classes, getting caught with things that shouldn’t be in his possesion of (not drugs), getting in fights and so on. nate was on a hopeless path, and with parents who didn’t have the time to set him straight, he was on it for a while.  

things didn’t change until he entered high school. he still kept to himself for the most part, but started to gain interest in math, like.. he couldn’t look away from the blackboard and he never missed a class. the teacher had a lot of one-on-ones with him and recognized something in nate, a talent for recognizing patterns and picking up things quickly. he had never paid attention or put in work in any class before, and felt proud of himself perhaps the first time in his life. so the teacher basically helped and mentored him throughout all three hs years and set him on his path to yale <3 think of it like a mr miyagi daniel-san kinda thing odsmcospdc they had a repoire and he wanted to make him proud, more than he did his parents.. and they still keep in touch

fast forward a bit, nate gets accepted and his parents are of course proud (they themselves having gone to less prestigious schools, and don’t earn as much as they would like) and show off to they friends. it makes nathan feel icky, like they’re responsible for his achievements, so he basically tells them to fuck off and leave him alone for a while. since then, they’re contact has been iffy and nathan distances himself from everyone, because it’s all he has known or seen growing up. the silence feels natural to him, like it’s supposed to be that way.

about a year into his undergrad program, nate is tinkering with something on his phone and finds it really annoying that it won’t work like he wants it to, so he develops a quick fix in the form of an app (bro i don’t have an actual idea for this i’m a dumbass OPNVDPVND). it turns out a lot of people needed it and the app takes off, which gains him a bit of notoriety (on campus and in tech news/circles). he subsequently decides to spend an immense time on improving the app, since he cannot handle a single bad review, it makes him feel like everything he has done since birth is a mistake. as a result, he falls a bit behing on classes and gets a grade he is also not satisfied with.. it would basically mean he was going to fail the course and would have to redo it. all because he basically didn’t show up. so he finesses the system and changes his grade, so no one has to see him fail. he carries a lot of guilt because of this, and it has only made him isolate himself more. 

personality-wise he is soft spoken and hard to reach. he likes notoriety and fame, it makes him feel looked up to and cared for. which are defintely things he needs, but doesn’t know it. he has a hard time letting people get past his barriers, so his sarcasm and deadpan jokes come across as harsh and cold. when really all he wants is to belong to somewhere or someone. he also kind of just sleeps around, looking for that feeling he has never felt. he also deeply cares about animals and spends a lot of time and resources (when he has it) to help at shelters.. 

i’m still makin him up as we go, so if u wanna know something pls ask and i will try to make it all make sense in my head ONPCDNOC 

[that-one-blind-writer]

Between My Teeth (Asrian)

@the-lazaret made a post talking about how the song "Between My Teeth" perfectly describes Asra and Julian's pre-game relationship. So of course I had to write something angsty. And if course tumblr had to completely screw up my formatting and cause me to have to redo everything. Enjoy!

(As always, feedback and reblogs are super helpful and make me very happy)

You say my name

I pull away

I can’t help it, I can’t take on all your pain

There’s guilt in this

I taste in every kiss

I don’t know, I’m just a little selfish

“I love you.” Julian whispers, pressing against him.

Asra kisses him again, rougher this time, as if he can shove the words back into the other man’s lips. He doesn’t say it back.

He doesn’t consider himself to be cruel, but he’s far from being a good person. He knows how Julian feels about him, he can see the way the doctor crumbles whenever Asra refers to him as a friend. He knows how much it hurts him, and yet he continues to lead him on, desperate for distractions. And oh, Julian is just the perfect distraction. It’s horribly selfish, and yet he doesn’t stop.

You need me, I don’t need you

Just admit it

I’m too broken to fix you too

I admit it, I admit it

“I love you.” Julian says again between kisses, a bit more desperate this time. He craves love and the security of a relationship, two things Asra will never be able to give him. Not in the way he wants it.

The loss of Elise destroyed him, and he vowed he’d get her back, no matter the cost. He couldn’t love anyone else. He and Julian had one thing in common: they were broken by the loss of someone they’d cared about. But Asra can barely save himself, much less someone like Julian. He can’t keep doing this, it’s not fair to either of them.

Oh! Please don’t lean on me

Cause I don’t want your heart between my teeth

I, I think I gotta leave

Cause I don’t want your heart between my teeth

I can’t take the pressure of it

I can barely breathe

Oh! Please don’t lean on me

Cause I don’t want your heart between my teeth

He pulled back, and his eyes betrayed him, tears beginning to stream down his cheeks. “Oh, Ilya…” He whispers, “Why do you do this? Why do you let me hurt you like this? Why do you keep coming back to me, even when you know I can never love you the way you want me to?

The guilt is overwhelming, filling his chest, threatening to crush him. He’s a monster, isn’t he? Julian trusts so easily, and Asra is betraying that trust. Fucking him and giving him just enough aftercare to make sure he was alright, rarely ever letting him stay the night. Always so terrified of commitment, terrified of another heartbreak.

Julian shakes his head, a hand coming up to gently brush away Asra’s tears. “I don’t care that it hurts. I’ve always been able to handle a little pain, haven’t I? If I tell you I love you enough, maybe one day you’ll say it back.”

In a perfect world

I’m the perfect girl

So together always here to solve your problems

But underneath

It’s bittersweet

The more I give the more I’m feeling incomplete

Julian’s words do nothing but intensify the guilt he’s feeling. “No, Ilya. I can’t ever love you back. My heart belongs to someone else. I don’t want to hurt you. The last thing I want is to hurt you. But I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep watching you destroy yourself just because you’re desperate for love. Love that I can’t give you. You need to move on, you need to find someone who can give you what you want. Someone who isn’t me.”

Julian shakes his head again, his lip trembling. “I don’t...I can’t Asra. There’s no one else. I only want you.”

I bite my tongue

‘Cause I don’t know how to tell you

I’m getting this urge to run

I bite my tongue

‘Cause I don’t know how to tell you

That you deserve someone else

That can treat you how I want to

Asra leans forward, hiding his face in the crook of Julian’s neck, lips pressed against pale skin, littered with dark marks from their earlier activities. He wants to love him. He really does. But he’s always been terrified of commitment.

Running away kept him alive all those years on the streets. A habit he could never seem to lose. He would run from his own happiness, to avoid losing someone he loved.

“Ilya, why can’t you just understand? I can’t love you! You deserve so much more than me! You deserve to be happy, even if you don’t believe it. This isn’t happiness. This is us, trying to distract ourselves from the fact that the people we care about are dying all around us and there’s nothing we can do to stop it.”

He pulls away from him, eyes growing cold. “I won’t do this anymore, Ilya. I think it’s best for you to just leave.”

Oh! Please don’t lean on me

Cause I don’t want your heart between my teeth

I, I think I gotta leave

Cause I don’t want your heart between my teeth

I can’t take the pressure of it

I can barely breathe

Oh! Please don’t lean on me

Cause I don’t want your heart between my teeth

Julian stares at him, a wave of shock and hurt crossing over his features, quickly disguised by a look of anger. “You’re a coward, Asra. You always tell me I’m determined to chase my own misery. But really you’re the one shutting out any sort of happiness.”

He stood up, throwing on his clothes. With one last glance in Asra’s direction, he left, slamming the door behind him.

Asra stared at the empty space beside him in the bed, blurry thanks to the tears that wouldn’t stop falling. He told himself it was for the best. After all, no one could leave him if they weren’t ever there in the first place. Right?

[aeronuzlockes]

Will From Grace update, or have you moved on from it? :x

Rest in Peace, From Grace

The author done fucked it up beyond repairs short of redoing it and it just wasn’t worth it. (Yes, I have moved on)

And I’m going to give you more than you asked for here. Like yes/no could suffice but I’ve been working up the nerve to give y’all my eloquent farewell and can’t truly be assed to do it so here’s the tea, right. The reason I’m not working on From Grace anymore...

 Only reason I worked on it as long as I did is because of the whole incident with Jelleh and Mae because before that happened, I was 20 steps out the door. Didn’t want to do it anymore. Got some long time fan telling me that using the correct pronouns for someone was a respect that had to be earned not freely given through the course of like  7 essay comments until I blocked the stupid asshole (Yeah everyone thinking I was snapping at Jelleh? I was snapping at that asshat 2 months after the fact bc he took his whiny ass to Jelleh’s journal to agree with him). Mae bullied how many people out of the community? And I got so many messages from people who were like “I’m glad you said something because I was too afraid to because of who would get involved”. The highlight was Mae sending me a message that began with a paragraph saying that I was just trying to salvage my “reputation” and I don’t know about the other 5 paragraphs bc I had better things to do with my time, but I got a good laugh out of the first part.

So I kept going out of pure spite- wasn’t going to the next nuzlocker bullied out by Mae. 

and I am out of spite after using it all to do something positive instead for once, had a huge emotional breakdown that lasted an entire year starting the summer of 2017 from extreme gender dysphoria which is when the updates started dying off in the first place, the nuz community is honestly better off without my bitter dumb bitch self lmao, I’m better off not being in it right now, and I’m in love with DnD and want to do my own original work. 

So it’s been real, y’all, but I’m p much done here... Specially after leaving the discord server with one final “fuck you” that I wouldn’t say I’m proud of... but it got my ass to stop hanging around waiting for a non-dramatic time to quietly leave. (that was my plan- to leave quietly. I. fucked. that. up. in a manner. that Leaf. would be proud of. but that’s not actually a good thing)

I have been kicking around the idea of a collab nuz comic with the dnd squad but we haven’t finished the game yet so... ??? not likely? but maybe? and with me just drawing for the most part

I will probably continue to reblog random nuzlockes that look nice that I’m not actually reading bc I can draw my own stuff or read other people’s and I’m focusing on me right now. But don’t expect anything fresh on the nuz from this cat because I’ve been done since 2015 and canceled since 2017.

Hat’s off to y’all having fun in this corner of the internet. We may see each other again- perhaps not. If you liked what you saw here, you can follow @aerorwen for lots of gay art and portraits and people it’s a lot of DnD angst which is fun. Leaf is a half-orc druid and Arnold is her wyvern in that verse. Its a real fun time.

Alas, 4 years is far too short atime to live among such excellent and admirable nuzlockers. I don't know halfof you half as well as I should like, and I like less than half of you half aswell as you deserve.

So long, and may your horse never be an ass.

bye

[waywardnerd67]

Writing Your Story: Chap. 11 - Another Book, Really?

Summary: Raelyn sends her finished manuscript to her publisher to start getting ready for the release of it. She begins writing her next book that is a little more personal to her than the Supernatural series. The only person she tells that she is writing a new book is Sam.

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel and Raelyn Nichols (OFC) Pairing: Dean X Raelyn (OFC) Warnings: Fluffiness, Big Brother!Sam Word Count: 2360 A/N: This is one of the shorter chapters, but I felt it was important to highlight Sam and Raelyn’s friendship. I love the idea of Sam getting to be an older brother because I think he would be great at it. I did have a hard time writing Sam so I hope I do not disappoint any Sam girls. As always this is unbeta so all mistakes are mine. Likes, comments and reblogs are splendid and I will love you doubly for them! Enjoy!

Raelyn walked through the bunker door carrying several grocery bags. “Need some help?” Sam asked from his spot in the library. Raelyn glared down at him, “Nope, I’m good. I minored in Pack Mule while get my English degree. Yes, come help me!” Sam chuckled at her sarcasm. “I think Dean’s snarky attitude is rubbing off on you.” He stated as he met her halfway up the stairs to grab a few bags, “Raelyn, did you buy everything in the grocery store?” He asked as they made their way to the kitchen. “Yes, yes I did.” She rolled her eyes, “I had to take the opportunity of Dean not being here to get healthy food instead of hearing him whine about it.” Sam laughed nodding. Raelyn and Sam put away the groceries and then went back to the library. “Did Dean check in yet?” Sam shook his head as he resumed his original position sitting with his legs kicked up on the table. “No, last I heard he and Cas were still following up with Donatello.” Raelyn sighed as she checked her email on her phone. Dean and Castiel had left a few days earlier to get the prophet, Donatello, so he could read the Demon Tablet. They were hoping there was something about how to open a riff into the Alternate Universe.

Raelyn clicked on an email from her agent and gasped excitedly. “What’s up?” Sam asked as Raelyn bounced in her chair. “My agent just sent me the approval for my newest novel!” Sam threw his head back sighing loudly. Raelyn pursed her lips together, “What?” Sam looked over to her, “Another book, really? Aren’t you tired of writing about our lives?” Raelyn set her phone down and reached over closing Sam’s laptop. “What’s going on with you lately? Your sour mood makes lemons jealous, now split it.” Sam looked down at his hands in his lap. “I don’t want to talk about it.” Normally, Raelyn would not push the issue but Sam had been like this since they went missing and she could not take it anymore. “Not good enough. I have given you space and have tried to keep Dean from pestering you about it. You need to talk about it because if you keep bottling it up then you will explode.” Sam sighed as his shoulders slumped over. “You’re right which is annoying.” Raelyn chuckled, “You love me and you know it. Come on, I know just the spot to go to. Perfect for sharing a bottle of whiskey and talking.” Raelyn jumped up and grabbed Sam’s hand leading him towards the garage.

Raelyn drove them to the open field Dean had taken her to on their redo date. Since then they had gone there quite a few times and it had become her favorite spot. She grabbed the blanket she kept in her trunk for emergencies and Sam grabbed the bag with the bottle of whiskey. They sat down and drank a couple glasses each of whiskey before Sam was ready to start talking. “Last year when we lost mom and Cas, we had Jack. I knew Jack had special powers to help is get mom back. I had a plan that I could focus on while I pushed back my grief. Now, Jack is stuck in the same world as our mom and we have no idea how to get either of them back. I feel lost and defeated.” Raelyn poured another glass for him. “Yet, you know of a spell that can open a riff and you know of the person who can read said spell from the Demon Table.” Sam scoffed, “All true, but something will happen where it doesn’t work and we are back at square one again. I’m just tired of always being the one who is hopeful. I just don’t have the energy for it anymore.” His words tore into her heart. The one thing she loved most about Sam was that he always had faith. He always saw the glass half full. There was always a light at the end of whatever dark tunnel they had to fight their way through.

“Sam, if anyone can relate to how you feel it’s me. You can’t give up hope though. You have to focus one thing that gives you the slightest feeling of hope and then build upon that. You can’t focus on the big picture or the end goal. Take it one step at a time.” Sam’s hazel eyes were misty and she reached out squeezing his hand. “What is one thing that you can focus on that can be the foundation?” Sam stretched his long legs out and leaned back on her elbows. “I have Dean and Cas and you in my corner always looking for answers. Always having my back.” Raelyn smiled sitting cross legged on the blanket. “Then focus on that for now and then add little moments of hope on to it. We’ve always got your back.” Sam gave her a small smile as they sat there for a little while longer.

Raelyn over the next few days, while the brothers were focusing on finding the ingredients to the spell, began writing her newest manuscript. She had sent her latest Supernatural manuscript back to her publisher for a final work up and artwork for the cover. Her newest manuscript was not a part of the Supernatural series, but a standalone title that was going to be based off her own life experiences. She pitched the idea to Eric when she was in Chicago and he got approval for her to go ahead and start writing it. As Raelyn was writing up character information and outline her story she felt a pair of strong hands start to rub her shoulders. She closed her eyes and let her head fall forward with a small groan.

“Whatcha working on, doll?” Dean’s husky voice only slightly registered in her mind as his hands working the knots out of her shoulders and back was overwhelming every sense she had. She grunted as he chuckled, “Raelyn?” his hands stopped and she glanced behind her. “Hey, I was enjoying that.” Dean swung her chair around to face him. “I could see that, but sometimes I like it when you actually answer me and not just grunt at me.” Raelyn raised her eyebrows at him. “When did we do role reversal here where you’re the chick and I’m the dude?” Dean sat down holding his stomach while laughing. She loved when he would laugh like that. He just let himself go and laughed with his whole body. It was something so innocent and rarely happened so when it did Raelyn always sat back and admired him. “I am working on character and plot outline for my new manuscript.”

Dean wiped a few tears from his eyes from laughing. He gave her a curiously look as he calmed himself down, “You actually plan out what you’re going to write before you write it?” Raelyn nodded, “Yeah, why do you seem so confused by that?” Dean shrugged. “I always just thought you wrote whatever came to mind and then BAM!” he clapped his hands together loudly, “you have a book.” Raelyn shook her head as she put it in her hands. “Sorry to disappoint, but that’s not how it works. I plan it all out first and then I slowly build a whole world around the basic outline.” Raelyn showed him an example from one of the Supernatural novels. She pulled up his character in the book showing him the basic outline she had for him. Then she pulled up his character’s plot throughout the book then how that plot would overlap with Sam’s plot and the overall plot of the book. She looked up at Dean who was looking at her in awe. 

“What?” she asked. “You make it seem so simple and effortless to build a whole world around two people. I just find that amazing.” Raelyn shrugged, “I have always had a vivid imagination and it helped that my two characters are actually live people who I can talk too.” Dean was reading over her shoulder the notes she made about him. “Yeah, but you wrote all of this before knowing us. Yet, you perfectly describe Sam and mine’s personalities. That is a talent to be able to read people who you have only heard about.” She smirked at him as he rested his chin on her shoulder.

“It’s not a talent, not really. I can relate to both you and Sam in a variety of ways. What makes this series so popular is the fact that the two main characters are relatable to people. They go through real life struggles everyone else goes through just with a pinch of monsters. For people reading these books, they are inspired by the trials of the Winchester Brothers and rejoice when they overcome said trials. You and Sam think that you guys are nothing special but a couple of roughneck hunters, but you’re not. You, unknowingly, inspire millions of people around the world through these books. More importantly, you inspire those who are around you all the time including other hunters and sometimes monsters. So, really, I’m not reading your personality. I write how I perceive you and Sam. These novels are Sam and Dean through my eyes with a little help from Chuck with a few details.” Raelyn turned her chair again to face Dean and was surprise by him kissing her. His mouth hungrily moved against hers as his hands went up into her hair. When he pulled away resting his forehead against hers she slowly opened her eyes, “Wow, what was that for?” she asked taking a deep breath. “For being you.” She laughed softly as he stood up in front of her.

“So, show me the outlines for your new manuscript.” Raelyn shook her head, “Sorry pretty boy, I can’t do that. I would have to kill you if I did and I kind of like having you around.” Dean looked down at her sticking his bottom out in a full pout and his green eyes went into puppy mode. She shook her head vigorously, “Put your puppy eyes away and that damn pouty lip before I bite it.” Dean’s jaw dropped as she started laughing at his reaction. He leaned down his lips just above hers, “What was that?” he asked as he stuck his lip out again. She brought her hand up the side of his face running her fingers through his hair to the back of his neck. She barely opened her mouth and brought his bottom lip between her teeth gently nibbling on it before she brought both hands to his chest and pushed him back onto her bed. “I said I would bite it. Now leave me be so I can get some work done.” She looked at Dean’s flustered bright red face and chuckled. He stood back up and let out a loud sigh mumbling as he walked out, “Damn woman will be the death of me.” Raelyn felt bad for not sharing her manuscript idea with Dean, but she wanted him to read it once it was finished. She wanted him to see it as a whole and not in pieces. Other than herself only a few people at her publishing company, Eric and Sam knew anything about it. She remembered telling Sam about it when they had drove out to her favorite spot.

“Now, that I have spilled my guts to you I think turnabout is fair game.” Sam said sitting up on the blanket. “What do you mean?” she asked genuinely not knowing what he was talking about. “You’re writing a new book?” he asked and she sighed looking away. “It’s not a part of the Supernatural series. It will not have you and Dean in it… directly.” Sam gave her a questioning look. Groaning she explained, “I’m going to be writing a fictional book, with all fictional characters, based off my own life experiences. The main character will be female based off me and the other two characters with be males based off of you and Dean. I’m leaving out the monsters, Chuck and the evil twin brother parts.” Sam laughed, “Good idea. What will it be about then?” Raelyn closed her eyes leaning back on the blanket letting the sun warm her skin. She peeked over to Sam from one of her eyes and then closed it again, “It will be about life. Building a life that a person could be proud of, making new friends, falling in love and all the twists along the way.” She looked over to Sam to see a sad smile on his face. “A normal life.” He whispered as she nodded. “Yeah, a normal life.”

One thing Sam and Dean talked about more than anything and especially after a bottle of whiskey was having a normal life. Many times, they expressed how they would never have a normal life with wives, kids, white picket fences. How their lives would end bloody one way or another. She could not help the sadness she felt when she heard them talking about how they viewed their lives. One day, as Sam and Dean were out getting some supplies she decided to print off comments from fan sites about how the characters “Sam and Dean” had inspired them. She taped them throughout each of the guys bedrooms. Stories of how these characters helped them through their depressions, divorce, death, communicating with a loved one, to quit their addiction and so many other stories. She had closed the door to her room when they came back to the bunker letting them find their rooms on their own. About an hour later she found them both outside her door and the swooped her up in to a big group hug. Both of them simply saying thank you. Just like then Raelyn wanted to give them a little slice of a normal life in the only way she could which was creating a whole world just for them.

My Nerd Herd: @waywardbaby @waywardrose13 @ladywinchester1967 @anotherwaywardsister @carryonmywaywardcaptain @1967-essentialghoul @weirdoblogger69

[with-arms-wide-open]

you know who you are

2/7/18 12:43 am

now that you’ve moved on from me completely, you probably don’t even check up on this page anymore. but in the off chance that you do, i just have a few things i want to say. and i’m saying them on here because if you are on here, it means you wanna know how i’m doing and how i’m feeling, without asking me. and if you’re not on here, i’m not gonna force my way into your text messages once again to bombard you with another long essay about how i’m feeling, because if you’re not asking and not checking up on me, you clearly don’t care. and i’m not gonna give my time and effort to someone who clearly doesn’t care. but if you are here reading this, thank you for caring enough to check up on me. and if you’re wondering, i do check up on your page too. p.s. i still check up on #she who shall not be named (until later in this post)’s page too, and i’m still convinced that all of it is about you. but so is most of mine. lol.

(i’m probably gonna reblog this once a week. to increase the chances that you might read this. eventually, of course, i will stop. and that day will be the day i will be freed from the fear of your judgement, and freed from you completely.)

first of all, i miss you. of course i miss you. you were the best friend i ever had, girlfriend or not. and i hope like hell that you miss me too. but i also wanna say that i’m sorry. i am truly and sincerely so sorry for hurting you like you said i did. you know that was never my intention and i regret anything i did to make you feel that way. i loved you. with all of my heart. through everything we’ve been through. the good, the bad, all of it. i loved you in a way i’ve never loved anyone else and if i had the chance to redo all of it all over again exactly how it happened, i would. even though i’m still in pain from how everything ended, those amazingly perfect 9 months were worth the past 3 months of emotional hell. so i’m sorry for hurting you. i hope you don’t think of me any differently than you did when we were together, because i’m still that girl. i’m still the girl that taught you new life skills and brought you to new places. i’m still the girl that pushed you outside of your comfort zone, the girl you had so much fun with for so long. i’m still that girl who never once stopped hyping you up, who was rooting for you and who never stopped believing in your talent and passion (including now). i’m still that girl who made fun of you for not knowing how to tie your shoes, or how to put on a bra. i’m still that girl who genuinely loved and cared for your family. i’m still that girl who made you feel like a goddamn princess. even through what we’ve been through the past few months, i’m still that girl. and that girl is terribly sorry that she was ever capable of hurting you in any way.

with that being said, i guess i’m still in shock at how things ended. not our relationship, that i’ve had time to process. i mean how our friendship ended. you were the one who wanted to stay best friends. you were the one who said you “still had feelings for me” and that you “weren’t actively trying to get over me”. you were the one who said you’d take it slow with her, and that you and i would take things “day by day”. hell, you even made sure she was cool with us being friends before you even made things official. not that that matters anymore... i guess i just still can’t believe that in less than a week, we went from eating every meal together and doing things best friends do, to not speaking at all. maybe even one snap a day. and it’s almost as if you made things official with her purposely while i was out of town, so that you wouldn’t have to face me and tell me in person. i would be able to accept things a little more easily if they actually happened on more reasonable terms i guess.

how am i feeling? i’m feeling a little played, if i’m being honest here. i feel like after the break up when we kept hooking up and stayed close, it’s like now i realize you basically just led me on and strung me along until the next best thing came around. and the second you found her, bam. all communications ceased. you started blowing me off, stopped asking to hang out with me, stopped talking to me completely. do you understand how that feels? to feel so used by someone you were once so dedicated to and so deeply in love with? it hurts. it fucking hurts like hell. it feels like you just needed to keep one foot planted firmly in one boat until you could step on into the next boat with the other foot and once that foot was settled, take your other foot out of the old boat, completely abandoning the old boat. like you just kept me around so you wouldn’t be so lonely, until someone else came around and you could ditch me at the first chance you got. 2 weeks. you hadn’t even known each other 2 weeks before you became official. didn’t even take 3 dates for you to kiss her. and then you kissed me the next day. remember that? i sure do. does she know about that? definitely sounds like taking it slow to me.

now this next part i just know you’re not gonna like, so read at your own discretion. i’m just writing about it because it’s been on my mind and i need an outlet; you know, because i don’t have any friends anymore? but it just blows my mind a little how fast you really have taken all this. i mean, when you really think about it, she’s really your 4th girlfriend in 2 years. Lacey, me, Caylie, her... and i was 11 months of that. isn’t that something? 3rd girlfriend since you moved out of your childhood home. think about that. now i’m no psychologist, but if you asked me, i’d say that it may or may not be correlated to the relationship you have with your parents. you and i both know that they absolutely pampered you growing up, and heck even still do at this point. and i’m not saying that your parents loving you dearly is ever a negative thing, but you depended on them your entire life, and then you moved 14 hours away from them. and right after moving out, you met me. and then you depended on me for a year and a half. you needed me. i never really admitted it, but i knew you did. you needed me to take care of you and to show you love and affection, the way you’re used to, the way your parents did/do. and then that ended. we ended. and you didn’t know what to do. you didn’t wanna depend on me anymore but you didn’t have anyone else down here to lean on emotionally. so you put up with my ass for a few more months, however frustrating it would turn out to be. and then you met her. you met someone new that you could depend on and you saw the opportunity and you took it and you ran with it. someone willing to support you and love you? didn’t hesitate for a minute. fell for her right there on the first date and less than 2 weeks later, made it official. well now that you had her, you didn’t need me to depend on anymore right? right. so you dropped me. as quickly as humanly possible. did a complete 180 degree flip and turned your back on me. left me in the dust all alone and said “good luck out there, kid.” and that fucking sucks for me. but you know, glad you’re moving on and such.

and if you think that i’m mad, you’re absolutely correct. i am mad. i’m pissed in fact. but i’m not mad that you’re with her, or anyone new for that matter, or that you’re moving on from me. i expected that much. i’m mad that you abandoned me for her. i’m mad that you replaced me with her. i’m mad that you didn’t think that we could be mature enough to stay friends while we moved on from each other. and i don’t mean see-each-other-everday best friends, i just mean you didn’t even think we could even just be friends that talked at all anymore. i’m mad that you thought that “doing the right thing” was a big ol’ fuck you to me, walking out on me at the exact moment when you knew that i needed someone by my side more than i ever have. that’s why i’m mad.

now, i know i won’t stay mad forever. because that’s not healthy. and honestly, it’s not very realistic. i knew you would move on, i just didn’t know you would hurt me even further in the process. but that’s okay. things happen, people change. we move on. you’ve clearly moved on, and now so am i. you tell me all this shit about how you want me to find my own happiness. well, i am. but i’m not doing it for you. i’m not doing it because you told me to. i’m doing it because i’ve wasted so much time and i’ve wasted so many tears on you. i’ve spent way too many nights thinking about you, when i just know you weren’t thinking about me. i’ve lost so much sleep, worried about our relationship as people. and i know that now. i know that i deserve better than the way you’ve been treating me. i know that i deserve to be truly happy, because i haven’t been truly happy in a very, very long time. i know that i have great things lying ahead for myself, whether that be in my career or my personal relationships or anything else. i know now that i can have a happy future without you. and that is so, so liberating to me considering there was a long period of time in my life where i couldn’t imagine living without you either (because i know you thought the same exact thing). i know this now. just typing this all out, i already feel so much weight lifted off my shoulders, even if you never read any of this. if we have said our final goodbyes and we have kissed our last kiss, that’s okay with me. and coming to terms with all of this, as trivial as any of it may seem to you, is such brilliant progress for me both mentally and emotionally. slow progress is progress. i’m doing just fine, and soon i’m gonna be doing great. without you. and i personally can’t wait until that day finally arrives.

[skold]

answer all the fic questions!!!!

got u fam

Fandom Questions

1. What was the first fandom you got involved in?

green day but i didn’t get into fic until i got into the my chemical romance fandom

2. What is your latest fandom?

mansonband yikes (and a lil bit of nine inch nails)

3. What is the best fandom you’ve ever been involved in?

idk... honestly most fandoms i’ve been in have been shitty for whatever reason lmao. probably you me at six was the most fun though

4. Do you regret getting involved in any fandoms?

nah

5. Which fandoms have your written fanfiction for?

mainly: my chemical romance, bring me the horizon, all time low, you me at six, one direction, marilyn manson, nine inch nails. but a couple other bands/band members have sneaked in.

6. List your OTP from each fandom you’ve been involved in.

i mean... respectively in the order listed above: fraycest, oliver/nicholls, rilex, flintceschi, nouis, j5/skold, manson/trent

7. List your NoTPs from each fandom you’ve been in.

i actually am not the kinda person with notps. i’ve never written in them but as far as the walking dead and star wars, i hate b*thyl and c*ryl and r*ylo

8. How did you get involved in your latest fandom?

idk dude i listen to manson and nin and i was like... cool let’s write some fic

9. What are the best things about your current fandom?

grand slam discourse, @nailingtrent‘s drawings, lovingly dragging manson, my fuckin friends

10.  Is there a fandom you read fic from but don’t write in?

currently, my chemical romance & star wars

Ship Questions for your Current Fandom

11. Who is your current OTP?

john n tim. honorable mention to trent n manson.

12. Who is your current OT3?

probs john n tim n manson.

13. Any NoTPs?

anything with tw*ggy

14. Go on, who are your BroTPs?

JOHN AND GINGER

15. Is there an obscure ship which you love?

tim/pogo. tim/john tbh. if we’re counting crackships?? john and bailey jay lmao

16. Are their any popular ships in your fandom which you dislike?

manson and twiggy, manson and johnny depp get that shit off my dash

17. Who was your first OTP and are they still your favourite?

it was manson/twiggy then i realize twiggy ain’t shit so it’s a No

18. What ship have you written the most about?

john and tim

19. Is there a ship which you wished you could get behind, but you just don’t feel them?

probably john and ginger?? i just love them more in a Platonic Life Partners kinda way i think

20. Any ships which you surprised yourself by liking?

not that i can THINK of...............

Author Questions

21. What was the first fanfic you ever wrote?

some shitty self-insert green day fic but i was like nine so cut me some slack

22. Is there anything you regret writing?

yeah the one where josh is a doctor it haunts me

23. Name a fic you’ve written that you’re especially fond of & explain why you like it.

you already know i’m gonna say traces of me in your veins bc it’s my masterpiece

24. What fic do you desperately need to rewrite or edit?

i started one i gotta redo. don’t wanna say what it is yet though bc then y’all are gonna be like “WHEN’S X FIC” and i don’t wanna be accountable like that

25. What’s your most popular fanfic?

you’re the best kept secret, rolling off my tongue - or, tiny dick niall

26. How do you come up with your fanfic titles?

song lyrics

27. What do you hate more: Coming up with titles or writing summaries?

i don’t particularly hate either but titling stuff can be annoying

28. If someone were to draw a piece of fanart for your story, which story would it be and what would the picture be of?

JULIEN DREW ONE OF YOUR STRAIN IT GETS UNDER MY SKIN FOR MY ZINE but if i had to pick another one... maybe trent giving manson’s knife a smooch in not so pretty please

29. Do you have a beta reader? Why/Why not?

nah ain’t nobody got time for that

30. What inspires you to write?

brain machine screams

31. What’s the nicest thing someone has ever said about your writing?

i literally screencapped it because it made me cry but one time ju said nobody writes bdsm as skillfully and carefully as i do and i die

32. Do you listen to music when you write or does music inspire you? If so, which band or genre of music does it for you?

i tend to listen to john 5 when i write bc his stuff is instrumental

33. Do you write oneshots, multi-chapter fics or huuuuuge epics?

i’m a one shot kinda hoe

34. What’s the word count on your longest fic?

it’s 69 shades and i am so not linking it

35. Do you write drabbles? If so, what do you normally write them about?

not my thing

36. What’s your favourite genre to write?

fuckin porn

37. First person or third person - what do you write in and why?

third because first person is terrible

38. Do you use established canon characters or do you create OCs?

i don’t do OCs. i tried that once and it didn’t happen

39. What is you greatest strength as a writer?

probably dialogue

40. What do you struggle the most with in your writing?

fucking pacing

Fanfiction Questions

41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:

i’m... not reading any wips

42. List and link to 5 fanfiction authors who are amazing:

just assume anybody linked on my fic rec list is rad

43. Is there anyone in your fandom who really inspires you?

idk i mean julien’s art is always giving me terrible ideas

44. What ship do you feel needs more attention?

JOHN WILLIAM LOWERY AND THIM LENNART SKOLD

45. What is your all time favourite fanfic?

ANYTHING. it’s iconic

46. If someone was to read one of your fanfics, which fic would you recommend to them and why?

it depends?? maybe hold me down because it’s very much my brand

47. Archive Of Our Own, Fanfiction.net or Tumblr - where do you prefer to post and why?

i’m an ao3 binch. so easy to find and organize things. BUT i should probably cross post to tumblr

48. Do you leave reviews when you read fanfiction? Why/Why not?

i always leave kudos if i enjoy something and i comment probably half the time

49. Do you care if people comment/reblog your writing? Why/why not?

PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS. VALIDATE ME

50. How did you get into reading and/or writing fanfiction?

i don’t even remember dude

51. Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!

i hate the recent tumblr culture where if you write a “bad” kink suddenly you’re an awful person lmao. let me write my garbage in peace

thx anon

[pinklemonadekitty-blog]

Knowing your partner well makes writing together a lot easier. tag this with the people you enjoy roleplaying with but want to get to know better. REPOST DON’T REBLOG

TAGGED BY: @pyoniumyankee TAGGING: @fxtelism, @cxtybxy, @awildcaiappears, and anyone else who wants to do this!

BASICS:

name: Jenna (I’m not a huge fan of my name so I kinda prefer Chickie, but whatever tickles your peach man) age: 18 preferred pronouns: she/her sexuality: Pan yo zodiac sign: Libra!!!

three facts

I’ve took 6 years of dance lessons, and I still keep up with my tap dancing! *shuffle ball changes menacingly*

I have two tuxedo cats named Licorice and Lisa, and a huge fluffy old man lab mix named HoneyBear.

I took three years of the basically the same creative writing class in high school just so I could continue having classes with my freshman lit teacher because I loved her that much. I will sacrifice a lot for good teachers, honestly

EXPERIENCE:

How long (months/years?): Just about 10 years now! Platforms you’ve used: Howrse (rip me), Tumblr, and Skype! Worst experience: Ohhhh boy so I won’t name any names, but back in the first fandom I RPed in on Tumblr, me and two other people were doing a sort of event where one of their characters was really close with another person’s and mine, Ichigo. An anon came around a pretty much really harmed these two characters to mess with the other one’s, and honestly??? All three of us were really into it. Other people in the oc fandom ended up joining in by having characters react to it and at first I was like “holy shit??? this is a big event that I’m actually a part of??? wowie zowie that’s so cool”. But when some people didn’t want to be a part of it and asked for it to be tagged so it wouldn’t get their dashes clogged, they started getting hate anons and anon death threats for being “joy kills”??? I felt really bad for starting it, though I had no way of controlling it and stopped the event right there and basically cried for the next three hours. Hence why I avoid big events now even if they look like fun :^))))))

Best experience: AHHH SAME FANDOM because man I gotta say that with the bads came a lot of goods or else why would I be here??? So with one of my characters, Rissa (it was a multi-muse oc blog) I had recently been getting cute little anons about how much they loved her and how she was their wife??? which honestly for me that was such a huge compliment because someone loved my character enough to make her waifu status. We kept going back and forth, me drawing them together and the anon freaking out and being sweet. So later, I’m RPing with one of the newer people in the community and she admits to me thaT SHE WAS THE ANON. AND I STARTED FREAKING OUT BECAUSE I WAS SO HAPPY. Long story short, she became one of my best friends in that fandom and we shipped so many of our characters together and I thank her for saving my will to RP honestly. 

MUSE PREFERENCES:

Typical muse gender: I do both, buuuuut I definitely lean towards female muses orz Favorite face: Definitely the one I use for my mun FC. Also used for one of my other OCs! Least favorite face: I don’t really have one honestly?? Multi or single: I’m liking the single-muse a little more, but Imma be honest, I have one OC blog that literally has almost 20 muses on it and if I redo it I’m probably gonna add a whole lot more sOOO

WRITING PREFERENCES:

Fluff, angst or smut: This is gonna sound blasphemous, but I really like fluff the best. Angst is a close second, though. Smut is good if there’s substance behind it, you feel. Plots or memes: I usually do memes, but I am just as good with plotting! My messages are always open for plot ideas and what not Long or short replies: I prefer to try to make longer replies! I usually aim for at least two paragraphs, though sometimes I go a bit shorter. Though longer is better for me honestly Are you like your muse: Besides her being a SmolTM and me being a TolTM, yeah we’re both anxious little nerds.

[bluekitsune]

Late NDRV3 Chapter 6 + Epilogue impressions

HOLY SHIT ITS SPY BOY ITS SPY BOY ITS SPY BOY???? DANGAN RONPA 0 IN MY V3/???????????????????.... No It couldn’t be. He’s long dead. Yuto Kamishiro can’t be this “Makoto”.  Is Normal-chan our Spoiler-chan? Hmm. I just have a gut feeling he’s a Despair idk why And if he’s so normal, how was he on Kibougamine? Was it the first or the new school??????? HMMM????????

KIBO NO Don’t........ I don’t want him to die noooo >:C DONT TOUCHY THE ROBOT ....... He might be disconnected from Naegey but he’s still our pinnochio. Kibo wtf plz

Ouma the ultimate fanboy of Movie Vilains. I stg (dem funny glasses omg...... Afro wigs, batcar? He’s a total fanboy) What the fuck is up with the DICE thing?

Oh I knew the Remembering Light was delayed. But what was the point? Hinder them investigating the Mystery of the school? That’s fuckign cheap. Is that the same Makoto from the initial flashback? I’m gonna bet my ass it is.

Is he calling “them” heroes because the Future Foundation members survived a Killing Game, if Tenjou’s game could even be called that? Hmm Did FF fall or not?

OMFG OUMA GRABBED AMAMI’S DOLL........ That’s gay 

That horse mask wtf  He was a closeted clown all along wow...... Is he a Joker fan? Crimes with laughter and no killing? Color me confused. I guess the Panta should’ve been a massive giveaway. Did he fall into despair after his crew was taken prisioner? I.... 

Now he’s gonna pull us by the nose again? Wow. OK

“Ro is Twins”? rantaRO? ShiROgane? Is this pointing to the Mastermind again? Like when he said the first one to die is related to the mastermind? Is that why we werent allowed into Amami’s room?

OH MY GOD THAT throwback. The nostalgia bricked me in the face. FUCK.... So it definitely wasn’t Kibougamine that erased their talents. Then, who was it? Was it the “Remnants of Despair” aka the SDR2 crew? Who enabled them to erase their talent and hide from the SHSL Hunt?

CHARGE THE KIBO POWER

Omg Ro is twins...... The Gemini dial! Uma is HORSE????? Horse head?????? How far into this did Ouma know? This started being written in chapter 2 no?

Oh so the weird background was Amami’s room... And he was talking to his future, memoryless self? That’s nuts;; Uhm.......  I cannot hold all these wtfs. Did he survive a killing game....... Done with these same students? Done with other students? Because if I was right about them actually being revived and Mastermind redoing it over and over, then he could have survived one of the “previous” “same” Killing Game. But maybe I’m getting ahead of myself @_@ Trying to piece all this shit together is always nuts without the final reveal. But if that were the case, wouldn’t he have had another talent, the talent that got him into the SHSL category in the first place?

NO....... How dare you show me everyone being friends? How dare you shove that in my face

Not this twin bullshit again. If you tell me her twin is Monaka i’m gonna murder myself

Catch ALL THE BUGS. It’s kinda cute that Ouma planned something like that, even if he was the cause for Gonta’s death....... I’m guessing there’s some nanomachine that they mistook for bugs 

MONOKUMA PLANNED PARENTHOOD omfg. That tacky as fuck room. Of course it has to be a Junko fan. And HO look at the bullshit murder again. Is it just gonna be “Amami was very conveniently killed by the mastermind instead of by Bakamatsu’s trap and she was executed wrongly everyone cries” thing? It’s funny Amami had the cheat map version, kinda like if you start Castlevania with the hidden places.

ANOTHER hidden passage in the bathroom...... I’m not even surprised. 

I KNEW IT. There WERE lies in the Remembering Light. The question is how to tell between them. Saihara why u not look through all the directories god dingit U friggin detective bitch

Kibo is so cool :C He’s just so damn Megaman cool. Fuse Megaman and Raiden and you have Kiboo

Ok so..... maybe instead of clones, there’s... the one that has some sort of Time travel would be? The mastermind? Kaede’s twin? Time for some 999 SteinsGate bullshit. But then why would they say they can bring back the dead? How would that even work?

Oh no .... I was just thinking Shirogane had very little spotlight moments and even less character development. Now everything points to the Mastermind being a student 

:CCC WELL..... It’d make her switching clothes with Akamatsu even more ironic. Also again it’d be a twin with blonde hair and a twin with blue hair. What IS IT with this combination??? 

SMH..... The passage in the bathroom completely fucks over Shirogane. Because she’s the only one that was in the girl’s bathroom for a long time. I shouldve known better than to let myself like her......... Nooooooooooo

53 generation bullshit? What the dicks is this? Hmm. V3. 53 huh. They screwed us over a lot

Yeah so if the memories were indeed false now we proceed to question everything. Is this false too, is this false too? For all we know the world could still be fucked but not from asteroids. But what would be the point if they weren’t even from Kibougamine? That would just be lame.

Are they in a simulation again?????? Suddenly Hinata?????? What

Now that’s just shitposting. They’re gonna pull the “it’s fiction” card. 

Well. This is extreme shitposting. Are they calling the fanbase sick sadistic fucks? “u guys watching these poor people kill each other” or something? 

I cannot hold this level of meta. All these wall breaks

I CANT BREATHE, LOOK AT THE TITLE SHITPOSTING???? It’s exactly like series that go on too long

So is solving that one case what landed Saihara in this? Or are their talents actually fabricated as well? <_> Are the people dead or alive?????? TEll me gonta is alive plz Nope they’re dead. They’re all dead for the sake of Tsumugi’s OCs........... GHHGJHDSGJH

Yep we were played hardcore. All the first appearances were the real appearances.

I really REALLY missed the DR1/2 voices DAMN. Fujisaki :C Ishimaru..... Even Celeste FUCK. Was Sayaka’s voice always this amazing? I love how harsh Peko’s voice is,,,,,, I love the DR2 crew so much....... cries on hands

So many out of character sayings. I’m sure the characters would loathe seeing themselves say some of those things lmao god

I think they got a real point. How you can suffer and be in pain with a “lie”, a fiction, but also how you can feel joy and hope out of the same lie/fiction.The dillema of fiction, of experimenting with taboo topics, in this example the killing, and questioning how much it plays a part into the reality side.

But in this case, it’s going to another level. Like questioning human existence in SOMA. If you take a real human mind and place it in a robotic body, can it still be called a human existence? Can humans scanned and preserved in a “fiction” still be called human? 

The ideas are very fucking smart. Kodaka trolled us hard while also questioning the entire fanbase and his series base. And dang, all those inside jokes. They really took a good long look at the fandom and how we think; But it’s still hilarious it’s all orchestrated by a greedy company, ran by a delirious cosplayer fangirl and feeding the masses that want both the negative and the positive points of the plot/characters

Kaito was in it for mundane reasons and ended up with the meaningful “protag” role huh. I wonder what bullshit Korekiyo said to earn himself such a shitty background story. I like his character. Just..... I wish his reasons were not bad writing. Tsumugi u done fucked up

Robot Bondage? I strangely approve of that

Shirogane waving goodbye with mascot,. throwback to Chiaki....... CRIES

:C Well I was right in not expecting Kibo to live. But still he’s the best survey processor ever. My favorite quiz boy. I will pretend you’re alive and well flying up the clouds cuz FUCK IT

In a sense, it’s like they’re blowing up a literal hole into ending the series and opening a path to direct the fans back to reality, or per say, the outside. “Go out there, do the thing, hope out there.”

In a world where your identity and truths and lies are uncertain, you have to pave a way for yourself taking the best out of it all? I’m sure someone will reason this game ending and the analogies way more eloquently, but anyway.

I really enjoyed the story. The extra effort they put on CGs really enrichened everything. I’m not sure how I feel about the big big big plot twist yet. I guess it’s something to slowly digest over time. Can’t say this is my favorite.

Was the time travel thing a misunderstanding by the fans or a prank by Kodaka? I kept expecting it and it was nowhere

I’d say in most to least fav, I’m still with SDR2, DR0, DR1, and last? DRAE. I still don’t know how to feel about Another Episode or the animes TBH

So this was me going through this rollercoaster. If you read this so far, then I hope you laughed at my stupid at least once. I’m gonna go and reblog a fuckton of fanart now. Bye