#// ty for thissssssssss

[yutadori]

uoagsjsjdidsnskssk work isnt bad it's definitely doable there are just some things i need to remember that might be a bit difficult because theyre kinda specific but ill eventually get the hang of it but like . ah i dont know i just dont like the work version of myself because thats where my insecurities come out and thrive like . im super ultra extremely apologetic to the point where i say im sorry without thinking like... the moment a coworker (kindly) points out a mistake, i immediately apologize and i didnt fully realize it until one of my coworkers reassured me by saying i didnt have to apologize and that it was just a small error u__u

i also just ... feel like i dont fit in, if thats the right way to phrase it. and not in the way where it feels like i cant talk to my coworkers, but i have this weird complex (?) where if i feel like im not at a decent level in terms of work skills, i feel like im not allowed to be like... super friendly with my coworkers? because i feel like im not on the same level as them in terms of skill / efficiency, then im not qualified to talk to them because i feel like im an eyesore or that im embarrassing or not worth their time. and it can be such an awful way of thinking because we shouldnt be measured and compared based on our skills but uoaghhh hdskxdksk

like on friday, my coworker (whos been helping me a lotttt for the three days ive been working) was talking with our other coworker a lot and i . felt so wrong at the thought of trying to join the convo by like idk asking them about what they were talking about because i feel . so much Lesser than them and i just !!! idk feel like i dont have a right ?? or i feel like theyre already shouldering such a burden by having to help me so much, that they wouldnt enjoy talking to me because of that . like . i feel like i have to get better so that the workload they take on because of me lessens, and then maybe they'll dislike me less auoghhhhhhhhh

[belzinone]

‘Redacted:‘ How does Bel dress? Of course there is her soldieruniform but does she individualize it in some way? how does she dress off duty? how when she has to be formal etc etc etc?

Send me ‘Redacted:‘ with Trivia or Headcanon and get secret info about my muse!

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// as a garrison soldier, she individualized her look with a red ribbon in her braid, a high neck lace up shirt, and a bustier underneath. her mother had her wrapped especially tight around her finger at this time, so she wore whatever tops she fashioned so long as they were 3dmg-friendly. usually they had a lot of corset lacing she wore loosely enough to work in. she presented very feminine because (1) it was the only style her mother knew from her Wallflower days and she inherited it (2) she was tired of dressing like a boy during her childhood. puberty ruined the original reason for it anyways.

// since joining the scouting legion, she generally dresses androgynously and for function (having learned her lesson from trost as well as discovering the comforts of binding from her battle-experienced comrades). as a scout soldier, she doesn't accessorize, just personalizes it via shirt like everyone else. it's a dark red/purple kind of color, sleeveless, and has a cowl/handkerchief kind of neckline.

// when out on the town, she goes with a bound chest, something loose to cover her neck, button-less shirts (often sleeveless), knee-high boots (to tuck her valuables), variously-fitting trousers, her scout cloak (usually turned inside-out), and similar unisex styles. it's not beyond her to go out in her uniform sans the harness & hip guard or throw her uniform jacket over something casual if being percieved as a scout soldier is a nonissue. at first glance, she definitely looks male and would pass for one until she speaks and/or she's thoroughly checked out. though she's most comfortable going out this way, it minorly offends her when people mistake her.

// on the off occasion she presents more feminine, she'll dress a bit more flashy, nothing less than provocative. in other words, her fashion sense swings between vaguely male-passing to harlot-passing haha. bare shoulders, off-shoulder peasant blouses, fitted bodices with loose or absent upper lacing, hanging necklines, casual burlesque-like skirts, and other audacious dresses that would raise the occasional brow in the... pseudomedieval(?) kinda time period snk takes place in. she does have some more plain feminine clothing remniscent of Sasha's outfit during the cooking ova that she'd wear when feeling more secure in her identity.

// she might mix these styles and achieve a sort of 'casual knightess storming the castle' kind of look (ex: situations where she doesn't have time for dysphoria and/or binding, such as during the uprising arc), but is more likely to swing the extremes (metaphorically akin to her dysphoric coping mechanisms). thank god she has to be in uniform like 90% of the time, otherwise her daily routine would include a morning identity crisis.

// formal occassions more than compensate for that though lmao. she agonizes not over what type of dress to wear, but over whether she should wear a dress or a suit. formal events are meant for dressing up and looking your best, but she can't even figure out what's real for her, let alone her best so it's a high time for stress while her peers are probably looking forward to a lavish banquet. depending on how she feels, she'd dress in full drag from top hat to wing tips or like a Sina noblewoman, corset and ballgown and all. her faceclaim does a good job showing this. it's not coincidental lol

// we all know she sleeps in 50 shades of lingerie. bras, risqué panties, bustiers, garter belts, stockings, robes, babydolls, nightgowns, negligés, robes... i spam y'all with these way too much but she just loves them THAT much. they comfort her more than anything else money can buy (though it's a very guilty pleasure of hers, especially in her snk verses because they're luxury items). her initial collection started with her mother's hand-me-downs, but soon as she rose the ranks to officer, her collection grew almost exponentially. somebody get this woman a therapist or a lover or a good friend or anyone pfffttt

// the only other clothing-sensitive scenario i can think of in the snk verse is swimming, so hands down, bel is a slutty bikini bitch all the way. if they exist in the era, she'd go swimming at a lake or at the beach in something similar to what Hitch wears in the latest official art. maybe she'd tie on a skirt. either way, she'd get a gorgeous tan~

[tellywoodtrash]

shaadi mubarak 01+02.09.20 lb

01.09.20

oh ho kusummmm, don't be so rukhiii rukhiiiii. this is a delicate momentttttt.

the actual physical discomfort preeti is in while stepping into the house. my hearttttttt.

kusum is so hella mad and wants to smack the shit outta.... well, someone, that’s for sure.

the actress playing juhi has heavyyyyyyy dalljiet as anjali vibes no?

preeti is having TUMHARAAAAAA SASURAAAAL!!!! waala breakdown. sis chill for a sec.

kusum been knowing that this shit was coming. she looks so damn mad.

priyanka FORSHO has history with tarun. i get the feeling he might have rejected her coz she's not "refined" enough or some such thing.

"beta hi khota nikla toh bahu ko kaahe sunaana?" 100% nailed it.

i fully get how kusum can be perceived as callous but she's just someone with duniya ki samajh and doesn't bother sugarcoating her words for effect. she speaks the plain truth, not what anyone ~~wants to hear.

also she is totallll self confidence goals.

"ram ji ki laathi kaise maathe pe baaji!" lmaooooo

oh no preeti heardddddddddd.

sumedh running to do damage control, bless his heart.

kusum like BRO DON'T YOU TRY TO SHUT ME UP I'M STILL THE BOSS OF THIS HOUSE SO HELP ME GOD

the badly cgi'd exteriors are so blah. like, surely you can devote a day or two to taking some establishing shots and then use them over and over?

poor KT can't shake the visuals from his head.

KT really the rudra of this house huh. a spoilt, doted on lil BABY man.

lol mom and chaachi are instanttttt shippers.

cheesy man has secret center of angst.

ouff again with this sasuraal waala ratttt.

juhi is best beti.

GOD WHO MAKES THESE DUMBASSSSSS FUCKING RULES ABOUT WHO GETS TO LIVE WHERE ITS BLOODY 2020 FFS SOCIETY AS WE KNOW IT HAS COLLAPSED JUST DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

juhiiiiii asking ALL the rightttt questions.

yes juhi you establish that haq!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

lmao kusum is so me.

great, piyu has a new reason to hate juhi's fam.

GOOD LORD SHE'S SUCH A FUCKING DRAMA QUEEEEEEN. she's second on the list of "ASSHOLES WHO NEED TO DIAL IT DOWN, WAY DOWNNNNNNNNN" after tarun.

kusum trying to find some peace of mind.

oh ho, piyu has a backstory, where she was shipped off to gaon by her parents for some reason. ok i feel a little bad for her (but not thaaaaat much also.)

juhi sambhaale toh kitne maaon ke draamey sambhaale aaj???!

BETI KE GHAR KA PAANI TAK BLAH BLAH BLAHHHHHHH

sumedh ko koi sach mein koi mantriii banao. he is best man for the job.

KT is always expected to perform the dialogues of his movies, like some kinda circus monkey?????

KT and his mom are veryyyyy wholesome.

ummmm, literally none of these people said any of these things, preeti. ainvaaayi khayaali khichidiiiiii of unpleasantness you're cooking in your head.

this fucking samaaaj is the jaddd of allllll problems. fucking burn it all down to the grounddddddddddddddddd.

02.09.20

KT wants to call chaabi waali to check on her. sweet.

great, preeti left her phone over at tarun/rati's.

OMG THIS BITCH. NAATAK?!!?!? MY GODDDDDDD, FUCK YOUUUUUUUUUU RATI.

KT didn't believe a worddddd of that bs.

bless this man's empathetic heart. he Soft.

RATI I SWEAR TO GODDDDDDDDDDDDDD I HOPE THIS GHAR OF YOURS FALLS ON YOUR DAMN HEAD.

and tarunnn, i wish you'd fall into a moat filled with hungry crocodiles.

sumedh is trying to find diplomatic solution while kusum eavesdrops lol.

oh i think sumedh and juhi handle some kinda family business together. sweet.

SUMEDH BE SETTING HUSBAND GOALSSSSSSSS. YOU RAISED A GOOD ONE, KUSUM.

lmaoooooo kusum and her ramji sayings are my fav.

my god, bohut hi besura bhajan chal raha hai subaah subaah.

i wish the walls of this house weren't so AGGRESSSIVELYYYYY BLUE. it makes the space look claustrophobic and dark.

(recently painted an accent wall in my living room, and this comment is a result of having read 30 thousand home decor blogs in a week.)

every time i see that wall hanging over preeti's face in that photo, i lol. kusum you're so deliciously petty.

khatarnaak music and ainvayiiii ka tevar for kusum.

LMAO THE MISLEAD WITH THE TWO MUGS OF TEA. KUSUM YOU PETTY ASS B I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

juhiiiiiiiiiiiii is literalllll sunshine.

and sumedh got them a special pass to go to some mandir in pushkar. god bless these twoooooo kidsssss.

preeti has enough self-flagellation and guilt to put the best of catholics to shame.

LMAOOOOOOOOO KUSUM RUNNING AWAYYYYYYYYYYYYYY TO HIDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE AND DO NAATAKKKKK.

i guess to get some attention + to get preeti to stay home with her???

yupppppp, she fully wanted quality time with preeti.

hahahahaha raajeshwari sachdev is honestly a gifttttttt that i didn't expect from this show but i'm soooooo glad it gave me.

askjfhkdsjfshksjf kusum's comments on youngest daughter's (kajal?) dungarees.

kajalllllll fully knows how mummy works. i like her best of the sisters.

"purkhon ne aakhein di hai ya cctv? kuch bhi na chupe thaanedaarni se!" hee hee heee

kusum + kajal tying for best maa-beti jodi with preeti + juhi.

"door se dikhaana tha toh photu kheench ke bhej deti; nimbu kharchne ki kya zaroorat thi???" hahahahahaha

lmao kusum tum juhiiiii ki saas ho ya preeti ki.

GOOD LORD WHAT IS THIS NAAGIN MUSIC?!?!

kusummmm ainvayiiiii mein tang kar-ing preeti to see till what extent she'll bend over backwards to accommodate the nakhras.

i mean, i don't blame preeti for wanting to leave this place.

oh god KT's mom is gonna do some totally unnecessary matchmakingggg. LITERALLLLY WHO ASKED FOR THISSSSSSSSSS??!?!?!

stop calling a 40 year old man A LADKA, jesus. daaant haath mein aa jayenge phir bhi desi maaa ke liye apna raja beta LADKA hi hai.

kusum is totalllly miffed at preeti's over-formal, farmabardaaaar behaviorrrr.

OH HOOOOOO KUSUMMMMMMMM TAAAANA MAT MAAROOOOOOOO

I SHALL NOT BE FOOLED BY THE RED HERRING PRECAP I'M SOOOOOOOOO FUCKING HYPED FOR TOMM'S EPPPPPPPP IT'S GOING TO BE FUCKING GLORIOUS AND BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!