#// luckily it's not OVERWHELMING or I'd be freaking out

[gccdstories]

// so when it comes to little Xaden and Sasha, apparently "bugs" are the one thing that just blows their minds.

I have a little panther in Xaden and a little lion in Sasha, but when it comes to the occasional itty bitty bug that crawls on the floor or the wall or what have you-- yeah, they're not the hunters in that scenario.

Silly kitty cats.

[grapejuicegay]

Get to know me tag! :)

I was tagged by @telomeke here and @dribs-and-drabbles here.

do you make your bed?

I try to! On days that I'm too busy to make it in the morning I do so about half an hour before I'm getting to bed. I don't like the feeling of getting back into an unmade bed - it feels like a completely unproductive day and that just throws me off

what's your favourite number?

I don't really have a favourite but I love multiples of 7, they make my brain go brrr

what is your job?

Photography! It's something I always wanted to do as a child but gave up on as an unrealistic dream before eventually sort of stumbling into it. Happy accidents and all that.

if you could go back to school, would you?

Hah! No chance. I burnt myself out pretty badly through undergrad by taking on far too much - there were just so many things that I found interesting - and I'd much rather not repeat that experience.

can you parallel park?

I can't drive. I keep meaning to learn but the way people drive freaks me out a little too much. I've also been struggling with a bout of motion sickness recently and that doesn't help my comfort in cars. Someday though! Hopefully!

a job you had that would surprise people?

I worked on editing and post production on a documentary for National Geographic once

do you think aliens are real?

In what form, I'm not sure. But some forms of life that exist outside of our planet? Absolutely. My other answer, channeling the 12 years I've spent on this hellsite: doooweeeewoooooo

can you drive a manual car?

If/when I do finally learn to drive I'm going to make it a point to learn manual too. Idk, feels like an important skill to have

what's your guilty pleasure?

I make it a point not too feel guilty or embarrassed about my interests. If I started doing that far too many things I like would qualify and I just cannot live like that

tattoos?

I wish :( I have a bunch of small tattoos I've always wanted but I have a medical condition because of which I can't get any.

favourite colour?

It changes every so often but I'm particularly biased towards shades of teal right now.

favourite type of music?

I love rock of the general/alt/post/punk variety. Recently I've been listening to a goth-folk band called Charming Disaster and have been a little bit obsessed with their album Our Lady of Radium and especially Radium Girls

do you like puzzles?

Love love love puzzles of any kind. I just like having lil things for my brain to do.

any phobias?

I have a little bit of a phobia of falling off of high places which unfortunately comes from a close call during a hike where I slipped off a steep rock and almost into a sweeping rapids (luckily I ended up slipping sideways into a little pool in a gap between said rock and another big one... took a while to pull my short ass out of there but at least I wasn't being swept away!)

favourite childhood sport?

I was a sporty child, tried my hand at just about most sports. My go to was basketball for a while (though I don't play anymore) but now I'm more inclined to go for a swim or a bout of kickboxing, sometimes badminton. Funny story: over the course of a year I got hit in the nose with 4 different kinds of balls (not that kind!). My nose is fine but I was paranoid around sports grounds for a while after that 😂

do you talk to yourself?

All the time! It honestly helps me keep track of a lot of things, especially when I'm overwhelmed but it's a little funny when my everyday running commentary comes out in front of people. It gets me a lot of strange looks, especially when I ask everyday objects what they think they're doing

what movies do you adore?

Depends on the day you ask. I tried answering this 5 different times but each time I came up with 5 different movies to list out. I really could not pick for this one

coffee or tea?

Coffee! Far, far too much of it!

first thing you wanted to be growing up?

An astronaut. It took me far too long to give up on that pipe dream. But around the time I gave up on that I was getting interested in photography as something to pursue. I was bullied out of it for a few years sadly but hey, I ended up here eventually!

I'm coming to this way too late so I'm not really sure who hasn't done this yet. I'm just going to tag @casualavocados @celestial-sapphicss @jemmo

And like both Tel and Lin mentioned, I've been far too busy to be on tumblr too much recently (most of 2024) and so a lot of stuff I've been tagged in has slipped through the cracks. Most of it is in my drafts somewhere and sometimes it just feels too late to bring it back. I still love all of you though and I'm sorry!

[stardust-in-my-mind-blog]

my son of the driest wit

my son is eleven

one of my lucky numbers

he has my eyes and my sensitivity and a mind like mine

he sings with me and he's one of my greatest fans

he tells me his friends think I'm cool which is nice

kids are really honest and I trust them more than most

he's also sick this week and keeps surprising me

because when you're sick everyone turns into a child

and sometimes he's eleven or sometimes he's younger

when the symptoms are overwhelming

he feels things with such intensity and I remind him

that we are running gaming computers in our heads

so we get better graphics but it also takes more energy

luckily I said it in a way that makes sense to him

he likes his neurodiverse kind of brain now

didn't so much like it when it made him so different

but he has a group of friends that love his humor

and he constantly surprises me with how he thinks

today I got to tell him the story of finding out about him

he's always known he was a surprise in my plans

but I've always told all of them they came from the stars

and I was lucky they chose me as a mom

because he's sick he wants me near

he's not really a cuddly guy and gets overstimulated easily

but when he's sick that all disappears

he wants to lay next to me and hold my hand

and so I told him that I'd tell him that story

what was going on in my life and how

his father and I broke up after three months

and knew we just did not work as partners

but ended up finding out we'd created something

I told him about a man I loved and had gone to visit

before I found out and confirmed I had a passenger

he enjoyed hearing about it and told me

as I was telling him about different adventures

me and this man had gotten ourselves into

that he could imagine it in his mind

I think he was seeing me as a different character

not just as the mother he loved but the woman I was

before I decided to change my life completely

before I decided to change myself completely

it was the role I was going to take the most seriously

and I told him about how sometimes

you can love two things just as desperately

but you end up having to choose just one

I hadn't told him about this before

he wasn't really old enough to grasp the complexity

and I underestimated him even tonight

I told him how I'd wrote this email to him that was

at least a small novel about all my feelings

and I've obviously always had plenty of them

I linked a song and I think put lyrics and just

tore my heart out and smeared it all over my computer

and how this freaking guy wrote back

"you got four days"

yeah, that was it and that was a common dynamic

and he laughed at that because he has a friend

that's also a girl with a lot of feelings and a lot of words

to tell him all about them and he doesn't always

know what to do with all of it but he still likes to listen

I think he liked seeing me like that too

he likes to see me as all my selves which I'm still learning

I kind of thought I was supposed to play

this perfect mother role so that's something to think about

I told him I had four days to visit because this man

was leaving to go to war in a desert like his own dad had

so I went and visited and that love we couldn't quite

figure out but always had was still there

and to my son I said, still kind of bewildered to know

even though I lived it and I knew it but to say it

somehow gave it a new meaning and a new feeling

"when I told him I was pregnant he said something to me..."

and this kid didn't even miss a beat and left me laughing

"did he offer to buy you some plan B?"

and he said it with curiosity and not a lick of judgement

I don't even think he knew why I was laughing

fuck I'm still laughing because it's so logical

and when I got myself together I shook my head

and told him that the man offered to help me raise him

I'd already framed the whole thing kind of like a folk story

as a joke to keep everything light and upbeat

and I let him sit with that a moment but he didn't say anything

and then I went on to tell him about how

I made the choice for him because he had friends

and family and a life that he'd leave to come here

and it wouldn't have made him happy back then

at least that is what I had decided and I knew

I had to at least try to make a family with his dad

that also wasn't quite ready but we all

did the best with what we had to work with

there was good and bad and ugly and it didn't work

and the kids are very aware of why their father and I

just did not have the same way of thinking about anything

except how much we loved them and wanted to give them

the life we never got to have as kids because our parents

also didn't have what they needed to make things work

in a way that gave us all what we needed at their age

and to this day I get to watch my children trust the world

with arms wide open and make friends and take chances

he wanted to hear more so I told more stories

and it was fun because I got to see things in a whole new way

I got to tell him about my poetry and a loyal reader

that turned out to be a best friend holding my hand

and he thought that was the coolest thing in the world

for someone to do for his mother that he now knew more of

it's a really cool story and I like being part of it

and that's kind of a new role

[autisticlee]

sometimes I really want to do boring generic things that most other people do all the time and take for granted, that I never get to do. like going to a pumpkin patch in the fall, picking a pumpkin, then carving it. i've never picked pumpkin before. last time I remember carving one I was a tiny kid and my mom had to end up doing it because I couldn't.

the more i do things alone, the more frustrated i get and more i end up facing some horrifying danger because being autistic disables my ability to keep myself safe and navigate the outside world alone, making me an obviously easy target for bad people and likely to get hurt from the many traffic violations i do every time i drive because of how much i struggle to do it, yet am still forced to do it because im forced to do everything alone. do you know how upsetting it is to not be able to experience "normal" life things you watch everyone else do and brag about and post all over social media because you're disabled and cant keep yourself safe but everyone constantly dismisses your struggles and experiencess? so your only choice to keep yourself safe is to give up living your life since dont have any close friends or people at all 😭😭😭 not even one person! everyone has at least one person right? one person to go to? Who is there for them? (maybe not people here since this is the lonely autism site) at least irl people do and every friend i've made online. I have no one irl. i'm always stuck alone.

I know. I know!! before i'm told again. I know. do it anyway. keep doing things alone and i'll "get used to it" (how long until then? it's been my whole life long already and I'm still not???) stop complaining how boring and difficult it is. stop making excuses and being paranoid. stop letting your dangerous mistakes that luckily didn't get you killed stop you from driving alone. or doing anything else alone. stop letting the multiple times creepy strangers threatened you, took your money, and sexually harassed you, and all the ones that tried to kidnap, hurt, and sexually assault you when you were alone stop you from doing things alone. thats what i'm always told basically. tough luck its your fault if those people hurt you! you should have been careful! being disabled by your autism isn't an excuse to be unable to do the things your autism prevents you from doing! haha! 🫠

but why must I knowingly keep putting myself in danger, when i know im not equipped to "be careful" due to disabilities, just to experience a semblance of "normal" life? does being forced to do 99% of things alone while not enjoying any of it even qualify as "normal" though lmao. why is this my life?😭 why do I deserve this in the eyes of everyone that tells me to "get over it"

I always hoped i'd make it somewhere in life and "grow out of" my struggles like I was told would happen if I "just do the scary things alone enough" so I could prove all my bullies wrong and make them jealous I have a cool important life they can't be part of. turns out they're right and i'm stuck being a useless loser that can't even figure out how to enjoy being out alone without getting severely overwhelmed and sensory overload, shutting down and becoming a dissociating zombie, doing everything wrong and not able to speak so cant ask for help, and attracting creepy freaks that threaten me for money, threaten to kill me for whatever reason they make up, try to kidnap me, try to sexually assault me, or explicitly sexually harass me. why is this my life. I don't understand. and I also don't understand why everyone in my life dismisses my experiences and concerns and won't take it seriously. even if it happens time after time. they say oh well you have to do everything alone anyway.

why is my only choice to keep me safe since no one else cares is to give up living my life? stay locked inside my room and do nothing and speak to no one and never have friends and never do any of the things I want to do? Great life 10/10 /s

[ithinkabouttzu]

hii i'd love to request a BoB ship if i can? i love reading through yours! i'm 5'3ish with curly red hair and glasses (she/her). i get too talkative one on one or in small groups but in large groups everyone thinks i'm quiet and awkward. i get attached to people really easily and tend to put other people's feelings ahead of my own. i love books and writing and i'm very conscientious and kind, though sometimes anxious. i have a long fuse but when i lose my temper i can explode at ppl unexpectedly. overall I am pretty lowkey and unflappable!

Yes of course!! Thank you so much for your request sweetie! 🩷

I ship you with…

Carwood Lipton !

Song Recommendation: Come and Get Your Love - Redbone

- Okay so you guys would be so freaking cute together, like match made in heaven

- When he first met you he would find you so pretty and angelic, like you make his heart rate double so fast when you’re around 😭

- Both of you would be so sweet together, like always doing special little things for each other and just being so cute with one another

- I think when he met you he would be so kind to you, talking to you nicely, he’d be such a gentleman the whole night while getting to know you

- You guys would just sit and talk about almost anything with each other it’s so cute, he loves when you get talkative and you just spill out whatever comes to your mind in the moment, it definitely makes him feel so much more comfortable talking with you

- By the end of the night though he would definitely end up asking you out for some dinner or just a date with you one night, he just loved talking to you and plus the fact that you are superrr attractive, he couldn’t take up the chance of another guy asking you out

- Ugh but in all first impressions with a relationship, he thought you were absolutely beautiful, like for him it was love at first sight, he already knew he had eyes for only you the second you walked into the room

- He adores your writing so much, (if you show it to him ofc) but if you talk to him and say you’re writing, he’ll know to leave you alone and let you do your writing 🤣 but either way he thinks your so smart and articulate because you like write and read and just do “smart ppl stuff” in your free time LOL

- He loves how kind you are to others and how you just put everyone else before you, he will always make sure that you are taken care too and he just wants to show you how much he cares for you always!

- I think you guys are such a cute couple in general, like you and him are both so sweet and I could def see you guys being that type of couple that every other couple would come to for advice for SURE

- Like you guys would have such a healthy and token care of relationship that everyone else thinks you guys are so couple goals, plus I could just see you guys being that OG couple out of the friend group for sureeee

- His lowkey vibe matches yours so well, like both of you can just relax on the couch or make a little fort inside and that would be a cute little date night for you guys, both of you are nonchalant and so chill about everything so little fights happen between you guys luckily

- He understands how you can sometimes lose your temper when someone else is bothering you and he will be sure to tell them off if they are, he hates seeing you overwhelmed or just fed up with people being rude to you

- He is pretty protective over you, more so just like if someone is stressing you out or bothering you he’ll tell them to cut it out and to leave you alone, (mans can be pretty scary when you make him mad )

- Anyway tho, lip is the best boyfriend you could ever possibly think of, he’s so sweet and thoughtful and caring to you omg, he will literally do anything for you if you ask him too fr

- If there is a book you’ve really been wanting, or maybe something else you might really like, he’ll go out and get it for you! He’s so cute when he wants to surprise you with a gift, he’ll be all secretive about it, going off to get the gift. He just loves seeing the happy look on your face when he gives it too you

- Your guys go-to for dates are usually just to the movies, or maybe out on a picnic, either way though he will be such a gentlemen the whole time and so sweet! Honestly date nights are the best with him 🥺

- He hates seeing you get anxious, whenever you do, he’ll usually take you out of the situation and talk to you about it, trying to calm you down, he’ll be so reassuring the whole time and he would be such a good listener if you ever feel like venting to him

- Overall though he’s just such a good boyfriend and you’re such a good girlfriend! You guys would be absolutely adorable together omg omg!!!

Thank you again for your request lovely! Hope you enjoy! 💛🩶

[cipheress-to-k-pop]

WHWD: AE-Team and C-Team interaction scenario (Conner)

I would like to apologize that it took me so long to send this, was trying to figure out a scenario. The others are still a wip, so who knows when they will be sent

I like to think the scent from a candle help calm down CR whenever she’s overwhelmed with stress. AE-Conner had help CR by informing her which candle scents won’t bother him or C-Conner, but she’s afraid to light them even when C-Conner isn’t around. One day while C-Con was out and CR was overwhelmed, AE-Con encouraged her to light one of the candles while C-Con is away.

No one was aware that C-Con would return sooner that day; and while C-Con was slightly annoyed when he caught a faint scene of a lit candle… it didn’t bothered him at all. He noticed how his counterpart wasn’t bothered by it either (or he probably refuses to even acknowledge it), so no reason to get upset about it… right?

C-Con does bring it up to CR one day, and he will see how she tensed up and become fidgety while avoiding eye contact with him. C-Con is slightly annoyed because it was just a question, but if he were to use his super hearing, he’ll be able to hear how CR’s heart rate is steadily increasing as a panic attack is forming mostly because CR is recalling the time C-Con yelled at her about the candles and believes he’s angry at her again. Luckily someone (who cares for CR well-being) was there to notice the signs and intervened, guiding CR away while she quickly mutters an apologize to C-Con. C-Con is just confused now at how CR reacted. It sort of… scares him a bit to see someone who’s not an enemy, but a teammate, be afraid of him.

I'm so sorry I took so long to reply to this. I was going through personal shit but now that I'm better, I'm getting back to writing and stuff I thought I'd take another shot at answering this

I like where it's going and I really wanna love this but I just don't think that any version of Conner would be this empathetic, AE or not. But I do definitely agree with the first part. AER and AE-Conner most definitely went out for a designated candle shopping day and he almost passed out in a bath and body works.

It was interspaced with many breaks, temper tantrums and lowkey panic attacks (Conner was the one panicking not AER). So they both kind of collaborated and compromised. AER chose a scent that was barely there and also soothing to him. But since the trip, she's been very careful about lighting them. (Not out of fear but just consideration for him)

If C-Conner had calmly explained to YJR why the candles bothered him so much instead of freaking out and yelling at an already insecure version of her they probably would have come to the same conclusion.

But no such luck.

I don't think AE Conner would have helped YJR pick another candle scent because at this point, he already knows his counterpart hates any single scent and he'd be more concerned about why YJR is so panicked and anxious whenever he tries to talk to her.

It's like she's scared of him

And he realizes very quickly he needs to knock some sense into C-Conner

Basically tells him to get his shit together, stop acting like a little bitch and apologize for throwing a hissy fit.

C-Conner does not take it well but does admit that it's unfair of him to make a big deal about just lighting a candle and reluctantly agrees to apologize.

Boy, it does not go well.

YJR won't even make eye contact with him and he can practically hear how loud your heart is ramming against your ribs. The amount of stimulation disturbs him more than the scent of a candle. He can practically feel his eardrums vibrating with each beat.

YJR just wants to run away and looks for the quickest moment to cut the conversation short.

Luckily AE-Conner catches them just in time and is like "I thought I told you to apologize?"

C-Conner is just like "I'm trying!"

"Clearly not hard enough! She's terrified!"

And it's then he realizes that the heart pounding in your chest is because you were scared of him. Not because you were nervous, or awkward or shy. You were frightened. Of him in particular.

And then he realized just how badly he had been behaving and understands that when it comes to you, he needs to be even more gentle.

He doesn't want anyone to fear him. Not like this.

He offers a sincere apology and then next week YJR finds a bottle of lotion on her table. It's the same scent as her favourite candle.

"I know it's not a candle but I hope this is a good compromise."

YJR applies it every time she feels anxious and when C-Conner can smell it, he knows that she needs comforting.

[arcadia-city-stories-if]

So a little while back, I got hit by a car while walking. Tonight, at work, I was getting my stuff and as I headed to it got run into by a coworker. Wasn't even someone in a car, just another person walking. It freaked me out bad enough I literally was crying the entire ride home and then I realized I'd left my jacket at work as a result. Luckily I can get my jacket tomorrow when I go in but the whole thing is just frustrating to me because on the one hand I know nothing really happened then but on the other hand I got hit by a freaking car so maybe it is logical I'd be freaked out getting run into on foot too and I just cyidjtzjfsjtzu.

Sorry, to the ask part of this. How would ROs react to MC in a similar situation? Where they're freaked but being freaked has them frustrated with themselves?

You know, I've been thinking a lot about this since you sent it because I can really relate to this one lol. I got hit by a car when I was a kid, spent a month in hospital, dealt with it all without any real emotional trauma, then when I was 17 I had headphones in when I was getting off the bus and stepped out behind it only to have a car have to anchor on the brakes and stop like a metre away from hitting me lol. At the time I had like a weird relieved laugh but the second I got home I BURST into tears and had my very first panic attack lol.

So I totally get where your head was at in this one and for some reason it made this kinda tricky to answer??

But, anyway, here's my best shot lol

Murphy -

Ignores whatever else is going on as he puts a hand on your shoulder, drawing your attention to him as he takes very slow purposeful breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth, encourages you to follow his lead until you've calmed down enough that it's not overwhelming. Would suggest going for a drive to clear your head afterwards.

Shae -

Sits you down somewhere private, makes you a soothing drink, and waits with you while the worst of it passes, would hold your hand if you'd let them. Waits for you to get past the emotional peak of your stress, then would encourage you to talk about it, what it felt like, why you think it felt that way, what you were afraid of. Encourages you to get it all off your chest while it's fresh, instead of suppressing it and internalising any negative coping habits.

Callie -

Just wants to hug you and tell you it's ok. Is at a loss beyond that because she deals with her emotions in a very external and instinctive way, so your reaction makes sense to her because if that's how you feel then of course that's how you'd act. Not the best at helping you feel better but is incredibly understanding of your frustrations.

Toni -

Honestly? Would react almost exactly the way they did in this prompt unless you didn't want physical comfort, then they'd just sit with you quietly, wait for you to work through it how you need to, let you know you're not alone in this, that they're here.

Claude/Claudia -

Would ask you what you need from them and would do whatever they could to give you it. Vampires don't have a tendency for intense emotional outbursts, immortality kind of puts everything onto the slow burn setting, including emotions. So, while they're not an expert in these situations, they know they have resources and the ability to provide you with whatever you need. You only need to ask for it.

[thebookworm0001]

@riza03shinigans asked me to talk about my oc and while i have many ellana has my heart so she's getting an info dump

Ellana Lavellan is my canon inquisitor for dragon age:inquisition. she's about 27 years old at the start of the game, leaving her around 29 at the end of trespasser. in my canon worldstate, she's the granddaughter of Clan Lavellan's Keeper. her magic came in later than her peers, but with a bit more spectacle (she was hanging out on a dread wolf statue when some templars wandered close. she, understandably freaking out, stood up and hit her head on the wolf's jaw. in her first act of magic, she set part of the forest on fire to get away. very eventful but luckily no one in the clan got hurt. this is where her in-game scar comes from.) she was very dedicated to her studies and to her duty as future keeper and found a deep love for learning and discovery. eventually, she fell for another clan member, Ahnen, whose hunt to bring back a bonding gift ended with both his prey and him dying. She would use the bear pelt he brought back as a blanket and mantle through the rest of her life. A combination of her grief and desire to learn more than she thought she was capable while serving her clan led her to depart - electing to be a wandering keeper to search for lost knowledge, care for her people as they traveled between clans, and find some distance from painful memories. The first place she was asked to visit was the Conclave. That went fairly poorly. and turns out the man she fell in love with was responsible for it all.

Ellana is intensely curious and feels things very deeply. she's gained the skills over her life to temper her emotions with logic - a necessary ability both as Keeper and Inquisitor - but does find the former overwhelming on occasion, especially when faced with great loss. She is deeply kind, intelligent, loyal, and committed to justice. As Inquisitor, she seeks to have people atone, righting the wrongs they have committed and serving those they have harmed - though how that presents can vary. Those she cares for may find themselves beholden only to her opinion of them. Those she does not may find themselves at the mercy of the many they have injured. Other times she lets her boyfriend straight-up kill you for corrupting his spirit friend.

On an unrelated note, she is very short. She is 4'11" and just. so tiny. she's not necessarily thin, though. before she came into her magic, she trained with daggers and continued to do so after to ensure she would never be left without the skills to defend herself. not to mention her staves aren't exactly light, so she's got a fair bit of muscle. she's not taking down Bull or anything, but she could knock Cullen on his ass in a fair fight.

Ellana is also aro-ace. getting specific with labels, i'd say she's demi or gray. either way the important thing is she's not attracted to people almost ever and it usually requires a previous established relationship. Ahnen she was romantically attracted to but never developed a sexual attraction to him. She's also in several aus with @roseategales ' Eludysia, where she's in a poly relationship with her and solas. their relationship is my favorite thing ever.

lets see what else can I info dump... uh, varric's nickname for her is violet on account of her green thumb. and the bright purple eyes and vallaslin. she's a dumbass who puts a magic mirror in her house after finding out her ex-boyfriend is using said magic-mirrors in his plans to reshape the world. she's a fire mage primarily and so is something of a living space heater. she is a Mom FriendTM. She's got a full-back vallaslin that has representations of all the elven gods within the design. 4 of my 6 published fics feature her - two of them are very smutty. one of the smutty ones is just horribly heartbreaking and i'm very proud of that. she can't hold her liquor she is a lightweight. she's got resting bitch face. she can be incredibly sassy when she wants to be - or when she's tired.

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Ocean Eyes - Part 7

When we finally arrived at Sue's house Chris walked with me to the front door... i nearly tripped at one point but luckily he managed to grab my arm and keep me upright! I had whispered a quiet 'thanks' before knocking lightly on her front door. Sue opened the door ushering us inside and leading the way to the living room where i saw Mason curled up on the sofa. He was asleep but he looked white and sweaty, there was a bowl on the floor beside his head incase he was sick again.

"He hasn't been asleep long, i think he wore himself out crying"

"Chris can you get Mason please? I can't carry him like this...."

"Yeah sure, i got him" he quickly moved forward and scooped Mason up into him arms.

"Mama...." Mason moaned looking around for me.

"Im right here baby, your dads gonna carry you out to the car".

"God you weren't kidding bout that fever" Chris added looking down at Mason in concern.

"Im gonna get him home, thanks for watching him Sue"

"Sure thing hon, hope he feels better soon. Here, take the bowl incase he gets sick on the drive home" she smiled passing me the plastic bowl that had been next to Mason.

The drive home i had Mason cradled against me as he slept, the seat belt going around the both of us being as we had no car seat in Chris's car!!

God i felt like a crappy mom tonight!

When we got home i sat with Mason on the sofa and stripped him down to his underwear to try and cool him down.

"Chris could you get me a cold washcloth please, there should be some in the pile of laundry on the table"

"Sure" he rushed off to grab the cloth, Mason was just laying against my chest, whimpering slightly.

"Here you go" Chris passed me the cloth and sat beside us "i got him some water too, he should be drinking plenty of fluids"

"Thanks" i smiled before folding the cloth and laying it over Mason's forehead. He moaned at the coldness but soon settled again clinging onto me, it didn't take long until he was asleep. I sighed in relief and carefully moved forward in my seat so i could lay him down.... i was desperate for the bathroom!! Mason stirred and held on tighter, for such a little thing he had a grip on him.

"Can you try taking him i really need to pee!" I looked at Chris with desperate eyes. He chuckled and managed to pry Mason off of me and into his arms.

While i was in the bathroom i wiped off my make up and tied my hair up before getting changed into my pyjama's.... it was gonna be a long night. Once i was done i headed to the kitchen and made coffee, hopefully it would help sober me up a bit more.

"Ah fuck!" I cursed as i sloshed the coffee onto the floor while making my way back to the living room "i made coffee, you might still have some left if you're lucky"

"Thanks" Chris looked up and smiled, i didn't miss the way he looked me up and down either.

"Does he still feel hot? If his temperature doesn't start to go down soon we'll have to try a lukewarm bath maybe give him some Tylenol...."

"Yeah his still hot, but it doesn't seem to be getting worse"

"This is so unlike him, Mason never gets sick. I can literally count on one hand the amount of times his been sick" i shook my head "i'm so close to freaking out right now you have no idea...."

"Calm down sweetheart, he'll be fine"

"Thank you for staying with us, i probably would've been calling my mom in hysterics if you hadn't been here"

"There's no where else id rather be" he said looking down at Mason lovingly.

"Right.... i should probably text Scott let him know we're home" i got up to grab my phone from my purse and started a text to Scott. We had dropped him at his place on the way to collect Mason.

There was a message from Derek on my phone too which i quickly skimmed, he was saying how much he enjoyed meeting me and wanted to know if i wanted to get dinner with him sometime!! I decided i'd reply to him in the morning and put my phone on the table, Mason was the only thing i could deal with right now.

I applied a fresh cloth to Masons forehead and checked his temperature, slowly but surely it was going down. I sat beside him and Chris on the sofa and sighed in relief.

"Looks like his fever is easing off finally" i said yawning and letting my head fall back against the sofa, we'd been up for hours now keeping watch on Mason.

"Yeah, thank god" Chris mumbled as he carefully tried to move Mason in his arms.

"You want me to take him?"

"No no, i'm good, my arm has fallen asleep is all" he smiled.

"You sure? i don't mind...."

"We're all good".

We sat in silence with the TV on low for some background noise and i couldn't help but look at Chris and how natural he was at being a dad.

"You should get some sleep, you look exhausted" Chris suddenly said interrupting my internal thoughts!

"You trying to tell me i look like shit Chris?" I asked raising my eyebrows at him.

"What?? No!! I didn't mean that..."

"Im fucking with you relax" i chuckled shaking my head.

"You looked beautiful tonight" i heard him say quietly, maybe i wasn't supposed to hear him but i did.

"Its amazing what you can do with some make up and clothes that aren't sweats and t-shirts"

"You look beautiful without make up even wearing your sweats and a t-shirt, i just meant that you looked good. I personally prefer this version of you"

"Haha, now i know your just trying to make me feel better....i'm a mess!"

"Prettiest girl i know" he said giving me that smirk of his.... my god damn weakness!!

"Are you just saying this because you think i'm drunk and wont remember?? Because i'll have you know i have mostly sobered up by this point"

"Im well aware, i just..... never mind. You should try and get some sleep".

I nodded agreeing with him, the conversation was about to turn awkward and i wasn't ready for that!

"Wake me up if Mason needs me...?"

"Of course".

When i woke up again i had somehow ended up cuddled up against Chris! He had his arm around me, my head resting on his chest, Mason still sleeping on his other side. To anyone who saw us and didn't know better we looked like the perfect little family. I felt myself start to panic..... i shouldn't have let myself get this close to him! It was too easy to fall back into that comfortable routine we always had..... but we didn't have that anymore, at least i didn't think we did. I carefully eased away from him making sure he was still sleeping and made a quick exit to the kitchen, he didn't need to know about this!

As i started making some coffee and toast i heard the soft voice of my baby boy. As i stuck my head round the door i saw he was sitting up talking with Chris, he looked so much better this morning thank god.

"Where's mom?" I heard him ask and i stepped into the living room giving him a smile.

"Im right here bud, how you feeling?" I asked as i sat in front of them on the coffee table, i reached over to hold the back of my hand against his forehead "looks like your fever is almost gone"

"Im hungry"

"I bet! But its dry toast for you buddy. You've gotta go easy for a little while.... are you still feeling sick?"

"No, not anymore"

"Okay thats good!".

"Dad are you staying for breakfast?" Mason asked.

"Um...."

"Pleaseeee" Mason begged looking at him with those eyes that were exactly like his dads, Chris looked at me waiting for my say so.

"Its fine with me, if you have time..."

"I do! Yeah of course!" He said quickly nodding his head with a huge smile.

After we had all eaten Chris took Mason for his bath after Mason insisted he go with his dad. While they were gone i sent a text to Scott with an update and saw a missed call from Hannah, i sat at the kitchen table and quickly called her back.

"Hey! Hows Mace?? My mom said you had to come get him last night"

"Yeah it was eventful, he had a fever and was being sick" i sighed "Chris stayed to help out with Mason... i had had so much to drink Han"

"You let him stay..."

"To help with Mason yeah"

"Hmmm of you say so" she laughed

"Shut up, what happened to you last night, huh?? You disappeared with Troy"

"I know, im sorry but did you see him?? I knew you were okay with Scott. So what about you and Derek?? He seemed very interested"

"He was nice" i nodded "he texted me last night but i haven't had a chance to reply yet"

"But your gonna right??"

"Yeah...."

"Y/N text him back!! That man was gorgeous!!"

"I will"

"Don't make me come round there"

"Oh god Han, your so pushy" i laughed.

"Only because i love you"

"I love you too, i gotta go though i'll speak to you later".

When i walked into the living room Mason was sat on the sofa watching cartoons and Chris was gathering his things.

"Your leaving already?"

"Yeah i've got a meeting at 11:00am..."

"Okay, well thanks for last night"

"Sure, anytime" he smiled "hey, i was wondering if next weekend i could take Mason to meet my mom? She's been asking when she can meet him...."

"Um.... yeah sure"

"You can come too if you want? I know my mom would be happy to see you" he said with a smile.

"Okay" i nodded "it'll just be us though right? I don't want Mason getting overwhelmed with too many new people"

"Yeah of course, maybe Scott too if he finds out you know what his like"

"Thats fine" i nodded with a smile knowing exactly what Scott was like.

"Thank you, i should go.... can i come by later though? Id like to check in on Mason"

"Sure, i'm sure he'd like that"

"I'll see you later then" he smiled before heading over to Mason "bye buddy i gotta go to work for a bit but i'll come see you later"

"Okay, bye dad".

Everything taglist: @jesseswartzwelder @dumblani @barnesandrogersworld @patzammit @rynabarnesrogers-reading @rainbowkisses31 @rororo06 @supernaturalwintersoldier

Ocean eyes: @supraveng @michelehansel @melissaglenn5 @denisemarieangelina @mrsjeffwittek @mery-be @marvelfansworld @cmalass @capstopavenger @fallenoutofrose @kelbabyblue @biebsmylife95 @loser-alert @traceyaudette @w3lissax @jennmurawski13 @ford66steal @saiyanprincessswanie @christocrave

[rejectedanimexp]

Villian eraserhead Au: First time meeting Present Mic

Yes, I did make a villain eraserhead Au. I couldn't help my self. So here's his design and Present Mic's first time meeting him.

Hizashi hummed softly as he made his way home down the deserted streets. He had just gotten off his job at the studio and had picked up some groceries. He lived in the bad area of the city, so it was rare to see people out and about at night. Then again, most people were probably sleeping at 11pm. Unbeknownst to him, a ruthless, sleep deprived villain was stalking him from afar on a rooftop. 

Eraserhead was standing on the rooftop blending in with the pitch black night sky. His golden eyes (contacts are great for hiding your identity) followed the movements of the hero who was out of costume. His scarf slightly fluttered behind him as the wind picked up for a second. As the unsuspecting hero got closer to the building he was on, Eraserhead narrowed his eyes. 'How can anyone be so cheerful and upbeat? His loud personality might make this harder. Luckily, there aren't that many people around.'

Hizashi pushed his round, red glasses up his nose as he suddenly stopped walking. He felt as if someone was watching him. Creepy. he looked around, but there was no one around other than the old lady who was entering her apartment building. That didn't stop the chill that crept up his spine. Perhaps it was someone on the rooftops? Eraserhead noticed the blond's uneasiness and thought 'crap, he knows he's being watched. Best to attack while he's on edge.'

Hizashi was really anxious that he couldn't see anyone despite the fact he just knew he was being watched. ''I don't see anyone- are those golden eyes up there-SHIT' Hizashi's eyes went wide as he found himself suddenly bound completely in a scarf and with the inability to talk. His groceries were on the ground, no doubt ruined from their fall.

Eraserhead had swooped down and captured the blond in one swift movement. He had also erased his quirk to keep him from yelling before dragging the captured hero into a nearby alley and securing him to a fire escape.

Hizashi was panicking big time.'Shit shit shit SHIT. FUCKING HELL. ERASERHEAD CAN ACTUALLY FUCKING ERASE QUIRKS?! HE'S NOT A MYTH?! Oh no oh no oh no oh no- OH NO!!!! Doesn't he kill people? Why did he drag me into the alley?!'

Hizashi squirmed in his bonds, but it was futile. He was stuck in a standing position with his hands fasted behind his back and tightly to the fire escape behind him. His legs were bound to the fire escape as well- probably to keep him from kicking at the man in front of him. his torso is also bound to the fire escape to restrict his movement even more.

Eraserhead sighed with annoyance. "Would you stop squirming?"

He put a knife to Hizashi's neck as a warning. "Even think of screaming or yelling and I WILL slit your throat." He then dropped his quirk. "Do you understand?"

Hizashi froze at the threat before trying to nod without getting cut by the knife. Eraserhead's voice was really scary and no doubt the work of a voice modifier.

Eraserhead grinned under his grey mask that had a golden smile on it as well as a voice modifier under it. "Hmm, good. Nice to see at least some heroes have a sense of self-preservation."

The knife was removed from his neck, to Hizashi's relief. Though, he was still freaking out. 'How the hell did he know who I was? I thought no one could recognize me out of costume. What does he want with me?' Hizashi decided to glare at the villain. He may not be able to yell for help, but that didn't mean he was going to play nice.

Eraserhead just laughed at the glare. "You look like a feral kitten." He then frowned as he pointed the knife at Hizashi, a few inches from his face. "I suppose I should cut to the chase, hmm?"

Eraserhead lightly tapped his chin with the knife as if in thought "You know, I can't help but wonder why Present Mic himself would be sticking his nose into the underground world." He then twirled the knife in his hand. "Don't you limelight heroes tend to usually avoid the underground? The underground is no place for a loud blond, you know."

Hizashi grite his teeth and hissed, "Why do you care?"

Eraserhead just pay the hero's head. "The underground world is mine and I don't appreciate unwanted attention to it."

Hizashi glowered and sassed, "I thought it was All For One's playground?"

Eraserhead laughed darkly "cocky, huh?" He roughly pulled his hair upwards causing Hizashi to gasp in pain and then leaned into his face. "What's left of that fossil's influence won't be around much longer if I have any say in it. This is your only warning Hizashi Yamada; Stay out of the Underground world."

Hizashi responded with a defiant look.

Eraserhead sighed as he put the knife against Hizashi's throat. "I really wouldn't test my patience if I were you."

Hizashi spat out, "Fuck you. I'm not going to just drop the case and let that bastard get away with what he did to his son."

Eraserhead hummed as he let go of his hair and got out of his face. He twirled his knife as he thought. Hizashi continued to keep the defiant look on his face.

Eraserhead asked, "This is about your adopted son, no? Izuku Midoriya, quirkless son of All For One who was left to drown after being diagnosed as quirkless?"

Hizashi narrowed his eyes. "You got a problem with my little brother being quirkless?"

Eraserhead hummed, "no, I suppose not. A quirk or lack of one doesn't define a person after all. Although, I do find it quite amusing you think you could have taken on the very same man who put All Might in critical condition a month ago."

Hizashi's eyes go wide with disbelief.

"Although, you don't need to worry your pretty little head about Little Izuku's dad." Eraserhead laughed. "I've already taken care of him earlier today. His remains should arrive in several boxes to Detective Tsukauchi."

Hizashi stuttered "w-what?"

Eraserhead beamed, "he's dead. All I had to do was erase his original quirk and all the other quirks overwhelmed him. Apparently, his quirk is what allows him to not die from having way too many quirks. Erase it, and he's a goner. So now that you've got no reason to poke your nose into the underground, I'd advise you to keep out of it." He pointed the knife at him. "Or else."

Hizashi gulped, "r-right. Stay out of the underground. G-gotcha. W-will do."

Eraserhead leaned in once more. "Well then, now that that's out of the way, what am I to do with you?"

Hizashi nervously suggested as he squirmed in his bonds, "you could let me go?"

Eraserhead studied his knife with an amused look. "No, you'll try to attack me once you're free if I simply do that."

Hizashi groaned, "come on, man! I've got to get home to my brother as well as replace those groceries you made me drop."

Eraserhead rolled his eyes. "You can buy more groceries in the morning. oh! I know!" He chuckled before knocking him out with a punch to the face.

Hizashi was out cold. Eraserhead untied the sleeping hero and slung him over his shoulder as well as putting his capture scarf back on. He would just drop the hero off at his apartment unconscious. The hero's ten-year-old adopted brother would surely hear a knock on the balcony door, right? Eraserhead made his way to the apartment and to it's balcony on the second floor of the complex. He laid the hero down before knocking hard on the door. He then ran off before he could be seen.

Izuku opened the door with confusion. "Huh- NII-SAN!" He dragged his brother into the apartment and closed the door.

Izuku deposited him on the couch before  running back to the balcony. "I wonder how he got here if he's unconscious? Did someone bring him here? But why knock him out ... unless they were a foe? But why would a villain return a hero safely home?" He saw a figure off in the distance standing on a rooftop.

 "Huh?" He then saw golden eyes. "Eh?! Was that Eraserhead?!?! DID NII-SAN RUN INTO HIM? How is nii-san still alive?!"

~~~~the next day~~~~

Izuku leaped into the Cat Cafe in his burnt school uniform and ducked behind the service counter.

Aizawa blinked at the kid, thinking, 'why is Present Mic's brother hiding in my cafe and covered in burns?'

Bakugo could be heard outside yelling "get back here you damn quirkless nerd! how dare you still try to be a hero!!! you're better off dead!!!"

Izuku flinched and curled into himself.

Aizawa sighed deeply before going outside. "Hey! If you don't stop yelling quirkist things outside my shop, I WILL report you to the police. Now scram!"

Bakugo just growled before storming off.

Aizawa went back inside while grumbling about quirkist brats ruining his quiet afternoon.

Izuku hesitantly glanced at the owner of the cafe he was hiding in. 'Huh, he looks dead inside-HOLY SHIT IS THAT ERASERHEAD?! I MEAN, HIS HAIR IS PULLED UP AND THERE IS NO GOLD HIGHLIGHTS IN IT, BUT HE COULD BE USING HAIR DYE AT NIGHT.  I can't believe I just used a villain's cafe to avoid my bully. And... he noticed that I'm staring. I should probably stop- DAMN IT! Why am I still staring at him? should I say something? I probably should? But what? Thanks for not letting me die at the hands of a bully when you're a villain and could have thrown me to the wolves? Nah. Shit, he's talking to me. What did he say?' 

Izuku managed to say, "huh?"

Aizawa was knelt in front of him with concern. "Hey kid! I asked you if those burns were from that egotastic brat out there."

Izuku stuttered, "u-um, yeah... but I'm fine! it's nothing compared to what I usually face!"

Izuku was confused at his question.  'Why is he so concerned about me? I thought villains didn't care about others?'

Aizawa sighed. 'He seems hesitant to answer me. Not to mention his eyes flashed with alarm and perhaps recognition when he looked at me. That's not good. He might know who I am. Although, his lack of concern for the state he is in is rather concerning.' 

"Those burns don't look like they're nothing, kid." Aizawa pointed out.

Izuku flinched. "It doesn't matter. No matter what school I go to, it's always the same. Teachers don't do anything. Never have, never will. Doesn't matter how hard Nii-san tries to get them to stop. After all, in the end, I'm just a quirkless kid wasting their time. It gets worse when Nii-san interferes, because how dare I the quirkless freak get a hero to help me? How dare I try to get my brother to save me from them."

Aizawa deadpanned, "ever heard of home school, kid? it's probably your best bet."

Izuku responded, "I actually haven't considered that ... man, I feel so stupid for not thinking of that!"

Aizawa stood up. "Well, I've got to get back to work. You okay walking home, kid? Or do you need to call someone to pick you up?"

 'This is so surreal...' Izuku shook his head. "N-no, I'm fine, Mr. Er- um" he looked at the guy's name tag "Aizawa."

Aizawa pretended he didn't hear the slip up. 'So he does know, interesting... it's not everyday you meet a 10 year old who can recognize a villain out of costume on the spot. I might need to keep an eye on this one just in case he decides to try to do anything against me.' "Goodbye then, kid."

Izuku ran out of the cafe after saying goodbye.

Aizawa muttered, "this one's going to be a problem child."

Izuku sighed in relief as he got farther away from the cafe. 'Well, fuck. I hope he doesn't know that I know who he is. I should probably pretend I don't know who he is to be safe.'

There will be more parts to the story in the future.

[cctinsleybaxter]

If you had infinite resources and all the time you needed what would be your passion project? Like if you were having a midlife crisis and you were like Right I'm making This Right now what what would it be? I think I'd make a 4ft tall dolls house styled after that Haunted house pop up book and make all the monsters and ghoulies out of polymer clay with wire skeletons so I could move them

1. I AM having a midlife crisis, and honestly I’m not sure. I think I would be overwhelmed and spend ages experimenting with what to do. This ask did remind me just how much of a fascination and love for dioramas I had as a kid, so I could see myself at the very end doing an odd collections project (think Frances Glessner Lee meets Nick Bantock, who’s work shaped me more than I knew when I was 14.)

My other thought is making the exact screen adaptation of Catch-22 I have in my head, which would be a team effort rather than a solo passion project (and luckily or unluckily I have no interest in actually working the film industry.)

2. This is the coolest thing I’ve ever heard and if I ever win a billion dollars in a freak accident I’m investing

[sheeppusher]

Feelings about my dog(word vomit)

Ok so this is kinda hard for me to write but idk really know why so I'll just start.

I basically told my dad that I want a dog or else I'd have no reason to live, seeing I was just rejected by my local shelter to foster kittens(it was fine when she was there but later she decided the space was too small such a fucking dick move)

But anyway yeah I had nothing going on, no work, no school, no friends so might as well just die right?

So my dad agreed even though he didn't even like dogs, he really didn't want to get a dog, but we got one anyway.

In comes Koda the puppy. I found the litter online they were €650 each without a family tree or official breed stuff but I wanted a dog now and this at the time was the best option.

Now if you feel I should've gotten a shelter dog. Mind you I live in northern part of the Netherlands. The end of the train line. The only dogs(which are about a handful) that are in shelters here are not beginner dogs. I wasn't going to get a dog that I couldn't handle.

But back to my puppy. You might expect a disaster story, but actually it's not. Apart from the 2 hours we had to drive to the breeder.

They had 5 dogs, the 2 parents, one of the parents' parent and 2 unrelated dogs(one of which unfortunately passed away in the short time we knew them). They were/are really nice people. This apparently was a one time litter. I think there were around 7 puppies and they were color coordinated. I chose pink.

Actually when we got there there were 2 not yet adopted. Pink and orange. One growled when I picked him up and the other cried. Thinking back I must have chosen the one crying because I'm such a crybaby myself.

He was so small. I could hold him in 2 palms.

It was awkward though because I didn't know what to do. I've always been a cat person. I know how to act around cats/kittens. If I could have my way I'd fill the entire house with a cat per room. But sadly my dad is allergic.

Although that little complication is what brought Koda into my life.

The second time I saw him was a couple weeks later. He was much bigger but still no larger than a boot. There wasn't much interest in us. I held him, but I didn't want to stress him out too much. We mostly just chatted with the family.

He stayed at their house until he was 12 weeks. We could have brought him home at 8, but we were going on holiday and a puppy that's not housetrained... Let's just say bringing him would not have been a smart idea.

It said in de ad too, they could stay until you came back from summer holiday. And they even payed for the shots during that time. Like I said they are really nice.

So we came back from holiday and went to pick him up the next day. It was pretty hectic too, because puppy training was actually on Sunday and we picked him up on Saturday and he had to vaccinated before the training. Like stresscentral.

Speaking of stress. Me. I was INCREDIBLY overwhelmed. You know that feeling of getting a new pet? And you get all nervous. That times a thousand. Luckily I had my little sister and dad to fall back on. Especially my little sister who remained calm as I was freaking out.

Honestly I felt so bad. I was mad at myself too. But I honestly could not handle the responsibility.

Puppy training did go really well actually. I myself attended most of them and I have to say I really underestimated dogs. They are so incredibly smart and learn so fast. Honestly you can teach a puppy to sit in a couple of minutes it's incredible.

My little sister did most of the training outside of the lessons tho. She was gone for puppy basic training 3 so that's probably why he did worse haha...

The trainer said it may be hormones but I know it was because I was a lazy ass and didn't continue his training through-out the week... I hate that part of myself.

Speaking of training. You know what happens there? Your puppy gets kennel-cough. Even tho you got them that weird nose stuff which is supposed to prevent it. They still get it. Because apparently there are different types.

Now kennel-cough isn't the worse thing it just makes your puppy slower and honkier, but try telling a new dog owner like me that.

The worse thing about him having kennel-cough was that I am a horrible person who was glad my puppy was sick because then he wouldn't bother me all day.

I'm honestly tearing up, I feel so bad for saying that but it's true. My dumb ass picked a dog breed that is known for their need of exercise. While I have chronic fatigue.

Now that I feel horrible let's talk about now.

Even after mostly leaving him to my dad and little sister he somehow decides he likes me best.

Maybe it's because when I do do something with him I don't just go around the block. I try for him. I ring the doorbells of his doggy friends and ask their owners if they can play. Just like you did when you were a kid.

But I feel like I only do that so he gets tired more easily.

Also I don't feel like dogs really love people and they only look at them as benefits. Maybe I'm wrong. On the one hand I hope I'm wrong, but on the other, if he did really love me, I would feel bad, because I could never love him as much as he does me.

Maybe I'm afraid. That maybe loving a dog is foolish. Or I really do just have a cold heart.

That's the thing. What are you supposed to think of your dog. In the end it's an animal and you'll never be able to truly understand it.

This time on holiday he went with us and all he did was stick to me. He wouldn't even walk off the property with my dad or little sister. It's endearing, but I guess concerning? For myself or for him?

It's like I was his lifeline or something. Looking back I realize even though I was concerned, I was kinda happy? The kind of happy you feel when you are needed. You are special.

Now I'm crying. I do love my dog. He makes me smile every day. Gives me a reason to leave my bed. Because dammit I will take care of that animal the best that I can. No one will ever be able to say that that's not a happy healthy pupper.

He's got toys, a yard, friends and a family that loves him. A minimum quality of live every dog deserves. Idk where I'm going with this, but it's breaks my heart to see how some dogs are treated. Some videos that I can never erase from my mind. Even now there's a lady in the same street who still uses a slip chain on her dog. If you don't know what that is, it's a chain that catches the dogs skin when you pull it's leash. They used to use it when training dogs(some places still do). Basically hurting them so they would obey you. How fucked up is that?

I think I've talked enough. Here's one tip no one told me before I got a puppy:

Don't let it eat snow, it will get sick.

This would seem like an important thing to tell me, but nope.

Ok bye.