#// kept debating whether to post this one or not
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
dull roar
#fanart#star wars#the clone wars#arc trooper echo#// kept debating whether to post this one or not#// went more experimental and im not sure if i like what came out
657 notes
·
View notes
Text
☆ you sow; & thus you shall reap what you are owed
{☆} characters tsaritsa {☆} notes cult au, imposter au, drabble, gender neutral reader {☆} warnings blood, violence {☆} word count 0.8k
You are dying.
Gold melts into the dirt, bleeds into the very earth that you'd molded by your own hands – a familiarity you do not understand the source of – you know it to be true, yet you do not remember it as Teyvat does. It weeps, in turn, for the way you bleed upon it, the way your lungs strain for breath.
It is fury and sorrow and fear and hatred so raw that your mind buckles.
You will die.
"A dying godling and its judge, it's jury – it's executioners," The voice is hollow and cold, sweeps across your broken body like the first chill of winter, "Archons who saw themselves Gods, now brought to heel by their own hubris."
A cold hand upon your cheek, the brush of a thumb across your lip, the gentle caress of cold across your skin. You know her – you don't remember, you shouldn't recognize her but you do – and she knows you. The cold beckons and you follow, let her kindness settle in the hollow space of your chest. You want to speak, to cry and scream and rage, let the world burn around you in a fit of flames so hot even she cannot contain it – but she silences you, quiets the anger seeping into your blood, quiets Teyvat itself.
"Do not speak, little godling. Guide my hand," She is cold; her hands are not gentle, yet it is bliss compared to the callous, cruel hands that have shattered you. She is cruel and cold and brutal but she is love in the way she kisses the crown of your head. She is love in the way she is the bulwark between you and the world that has scorned you – she is fury in the way she brings them to their knees. "And I shall enact judgement most divine."
They will pray for forgiveness, and they shall find themselves wanting.
"It wasn't our fault!" They cry, but you cannot recognize the voice – it breaks and cracks like glass. "They were too human. How were we meant to know? We– we thought they were.."
Silence.
You watch your judge – the executioner, the blade that shall carve their sins into the very marrow of Teyvat, stand above you like death. As cold as winter and just as brutal. Your temple has been painted in the gold of your divine blood, and she shall complete the masterpiece with their own. The Archons shall become the grandest art in the world – this temple the canvas, their blood the paint and their bodies the palette. The cold that cuts sinew cradles you – it sings to you, whispers sweetly in your ear and carves bone from body in the same breath. The cold presses it's lips to your wrist and it cradles a heart within it's palm – judges them and finds them guilty.
It is her spear that rests between their ribs, her sword that dissects and her dagger that carves – the cold devours.
In the breadth of this divine sanctuary, the Archons dwindle. They become the pieces of a divine work of art, they bleed and bend and break upon her hands. She shakes the heavens and carves mortality into the bones of the divine – your word is Law, and you weave their deaths into the roots of Teyvat itself.
They shall know of their grand folly in every moment henceforth and longer still and they shall weep.
And as the curtain falls, as the world crumbles beneath fist and blade, she cradles your face between hands too cold – as gentle as a shard of ice between your ribs, as brutal as the kiss of gentle snowfall. The world buckles at the loss of six, but she alone does not allow it to break – you will have to mend the wounds of the world when you are well, but today you weep and Teyvat weeps with you.
And alone, the cold remains.
Stone has eroded, the wind has ceased, the flames have been extinguished, the storm has been silenced, the forests have gone quiet and the seas go still.
But the cold remains, bathed in gold.
It wraps you in thick furs, cradles you against the winter storm that brews beneath a veneer of composure. It brings you home – lets the world settle into a stillness and silence that inspires only dread and still she presses a kiss to your brow.
It is cold, but there has never been something so warm.
Where hands have broken you, she drapes you in furs, wipes away the thick gold that clings to your skin. She pieces you back together where you have been shattered, reshapes you where you have been bent – makes of you something new. Not a god and not a mortal but something wedged between them.
But you are yourself.
And you are where you belong.
They shall put you back together and you shall know only the worship worthy of the divine. They shall carve this world into your image, tear out and burn away the rot that festers.
All you need to do is say the word and they shall be your tools to make this world your own.
One word and those who wronged you shall burn, too.
Just one word. That's all it takes, and they shall take away your pain.
#sagau#genshin sagau#self aware genshin#genshin impact sagau#self aware genshin impact#fic tag#genshin cult au#genshin impact cult au#tsaritsa#“eros you left for a month again” yeah.................#anyway. posts tsaritsa fic and leaves#i kept it kinda vague but the fatui are all on your side. whether or not your actually the creator or not though..#now thats up for debate.#did they tamper w teyvat to kill the archons? to break the world to be remade in whatever image they see fit?#using you as the means of their end?#maybe you are the creator and they just saw an opportunity. maybe they are just devoted to you.#i just think lowkey villain au but specifically imposter au where the only ones who side w u r the fatui like OUGH#i love the fatui. them being the only ones 2 side w u is so tasty#prime material for angst bc the self doubt if the only ppl who believe u r the “villains”#a lot of this is just like. tsaritsa posting again though#the tsaritsa who loves so deeply yet cannot love#contradictions all the way down#she loves you but she cannot love you.#she loves you but she will put a dagger between your ribs. she loves you but she is incapable of love#tsaritsa the woman that u r ough#harbingers and their complex relations 2 love my beloved#smth smth tsaritsa seeing an opportunity to install a puppet “creator” which creates a separate imposter!au when the actual creator pops in#did i write this just 2 write tsaritsa being vague and Weird and horrifying and a horror and a lover and just a woman and#yeah :]#please talk 2 me abt the tsaritsa pleas epleas pleas eplease please please please p[lease please pleas
314 notes
·
View notes
Text
when you think about it clive and flora are actually perfect narrative foils on complete accident. like what's up with that. professor layton and the completely imagined literary devices
#what did they talk about when they were alone for that one segment of uf . . . humming#i'm sure this post has been made before by someone more eloquent but i don't shut up. ❤️❤️❤️#it's like the fact that they both lose their parents at a young age#both are succeeded by a large fortune#both are incredibly insurmountably lonely in a way they are not equipped to deal with#both develop poor coping mechanisms (though one notably more poor than the other . . . el oh el)#both develop a one-sided codependence on layton (or rather. more like the Idea of him. the concept he represents)#they also both spend a lot of screentime poorly disguised god bless ❤️#flora just seems to shrink inward while clive. Well#flora is seemingly willing to accept any type of mistreatment so long as she's told she won't be left alone again#whether because she can't bear the alternative or if she genuinely believes them every time is debatable#she's fine with being temporarily abandoned because she is used to it. as long as she's kept around some of the time she's fine#but clive internalizes every slight and files it away in some increasingly grandiose and frankly childish revenge fantasy#on a small handful of people that HAVE wronged him and a couple hundred thousand that never will#everything he sees is taken as proof of a worldview he doesn't even seem to necessarily hold himself#that at the end of the day is simply a manifestation of a seeping debilitating loneliness#they both have people that care for them. but not really in the type of way they need or want#i have more to say but . . . alas. not intelligent enough for it#my point: both of these characters ard the same coincidence? i think not. Transgender;#t#professor layton
18 notes
·
View notes
Text
"Buddy Daddies" is the kind of anime I would've eaten up when I was younger.
But since I'm older, less wiser and much more traumatised -or able to identify the root of my daddy issues/ mommy issues/ found family obsession-, it just scars me more 👍🏼
#adoption#debating whether to put it in the tags or not lol#would absolutely go batshit insane if my parents had kept my adoption story from me#thank god it's fiction(!)#🙃🥴#ramblings#mine#i don't even watch it. just glancing at the occasional posts on my dash makes me want to cry lol#would love to watch sxf too one day. but ya know *gestures at sadness in brain*#fandom#thoughts of a transracial adoptee
1 note
·
View note
Text
your roman empire with the one piece men
that small gesture or word he said that entered your mind and never left.
starring : zoro, luffy and law !!
word count : 889
author's note : again, i'm so sorry for posting so rarely, working and planning a wedding has to be the most exhausting thing ever, i promise to go through all of your requests and to be more present, tysm for your support ♡౨ৎ⋆.˚ some of these scenarios have been inspired by moments i often think about in my life, can you guess which hahaha??
zoro was smitten with you, and longed taking a step forward in your camaraderie, and everyone with a pair of eyes could see it. so when nami told him he was on errand duty with you and only you today, the swordsman knew it was his shot to get closer to you.
gosh, you were gorgeous walking around the alleys with the wind blowing your hair and diffusing your hypnotizing scent. and there he was, walking by your side like a guard dog with his hands the pockets of his jacket, listening to your enchanting voice.
the errands were nearly coming to an end, and zoro did not dare to "make a move", which he knew he would regret. the alleys got more crowded and he was afraid to lose you, especially since his orientation is not the best, though his senses would always bring him back to you. he knew that.
as zoro listened to you and internally debated on whether he should say something about his feelings or not, his body acted on his own, finally closing the distance.
as he gently grabbed your left hand with his right one, intertwined his fingers with yours, before putting both of his hand and yours in his right pocket, acting like it was the most natural gesture on earth.
and the butterflies in your stomach never died since.
luffy has always brought joy to your life and fed your desire for adventures and fun. he lit stars to your world and invited you to let go of pressure and have fun, not minding about third parties' opinions. a lot of people would question your couple association because of luffy's exuberance, but all them be damned. the future king of the pirates brought you back to life and no one could make you happier.
a sudden rain came down pouring on the grand line and the wind blew hard. the entire crew started running around to put back inside the furnitures that were left outside. the rain was so much that it started freezing and you started to run to your quarters. yet, as you were about to finally reach your door, a pair of elastic arms grabbed you and brought you back outside under the pouring rain, their owner sporting a huge, bright grin on his face.
"luffy!!! what the hell are you doing? it's raining and we'll catch a cold!!"
"chichichi, i wanted to dance with you, (y/n)!" he beamed, his eyes adoringly pleading yours to allow his antics as he started twirling you around under the pouring rain.
between laughters only him could exulate, you tried to bring him back to his senses.
"but luffy, honey, we can't dance under the rain! it's cold and there's no music playing!"
luffy did not mind your ramblings as he kept on twirling you around, his hand standing on your the small of your back the whole time, his thumb occasionnaly drawing circles. with a determined gaze and his signature smile on his face, he pressed his forehead on yours, the rain drops falling from his nose to your lips from the closeness.
"together, there's nothing that we can't do (y/n). after all, i'm the future king of the pirates!!"
his laughter hugged the atmosphere and made your heart race even more.
your relationship with law was a secret on the submarine, and it was hard for you to hide your adoration for your boyfriend. after all, what wasn't there to love? law was smart, composed, mature and commited. yet, sometimes, it felt so easy for him to "ignore" your status in front of the crew or anyone for that matter, which tended to hurt your heart. did law appreciate you the way you did? was it unrequited?
little did you know, law had a hard time not paying as much attention as he would when with the others. because he had a lot of work, even when the others were not around, it did not mean the two of you could see each other. therefore, the soft gestures he wished to cover you with were quite lacking. and of course, he was the one to have asked to keep the relationship a secret, and because of his prideful persona, he would not admit it was not a good idea.
you and bepo were getting ready to work around the submarines for your chores of the day. you were busy going around the submarine with your chores tool and bepo, and failed to notice your shoe laces came undone.
and of course, this would not go unnoticed by law. the captain could not stop himself from going to you with a frown, which surprised (and scared) both of you and bepo.
is there anything you did wrong? why was he looking so pissed off?
"idiot. you could trip and injure yourself." your boyfriend sternly spoke, kneeling to the floor to tie your shoe-lace, leaving bepo dumbfounded and yourself out of breath, with a racing heartbeat.
"you know i don't want you to get hurt." he said getting up, his hot breath tickling your cheek in the process, his warm hand resting on yours, silently promising to show his adoration for you like you deserve.
and you swore you could still feel the warmth of his hand from that day again.
#one piece x reader#op x reader#one piece headcanon#one piece imagine#roronoa zoro#one piece headcanons#roronoa zoro x reader#monkey d luffy x reader#luffy x reader#law x reader#trafalgar law#trafalgar law x reader
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
suguru geto plays with your boobs when hes injured, by the way, just wanna let you know.
its nothing too bad, but suguru likes to sit behind you and draw little circles on your bare hips underneath your baggy shirt.
you had wanted to read to him, pamper him. after all, his leg is pretty much broken right now. so you just wanted to be a good girlfriend.
but the way his overworked hands slide up your sides so gently like you're the most fragile piece of architecture made you stumble over your words.
"baby, what are you doing?" you inquire, almost threatening to close your book.
"shh, just let me feel you, angel, keep reading." his lips are right behind your ear and you swore you could feel the lightest plush of his lips against your skin.
but how could you really? the way his fingers trail closer to your chest makes the plethora of sentences in the book dance on your tongue, refusing to halt their relentless tango.
soon enough, the warm palms of his hands hold your breasts so delicately, ever so gently squeezing them — playing with them. his thumbs rub over your perky nipples, making you let out a shaky breath.
his own chest is connected to the flat of your back, bent a little forwards as your smaller stature curls in the sparks of pleasure.
the book had long been forgotten. your own hands using it as leverage to keep you sat up as straight as you could, without progress, of course.
you knew long before he was skilled with his hands, somehow multiplying your pleasure by tenfold compared to playing with yourself.
suguru's uninjured leg comes to wrap around one of your own, gradually spreading your legs apart. a soft whimper slips between your parted lips when you feel the cold air grazing your barely covered pussy.
now you debate on whether or not just panties to bed was a good idea.
too lost in the wonderland of growing pleasure, lips upon your shoulder going to the nape of your neck accompanied by whispered praises kept you distracted from the fact a hand had left your breast.
"y'so pretty, sweet angel." he cooed into you spit-slicked skin. eyes hungry for the way you contort your face into one of deep pleasure and fluster.
suguru would always find a way to lavish your perfect body. he worshipped you dearly, kissing every part of your skin like it was gifted by gods. he always found a way to praise you in action, even when he could not pin you against the soft silken sheets of your shared bed.
with a flick of a switch, a vibrating sound resonated within the dimly lit room
"be a good girl for me n' just sit still, look pretty, okay?"
not proofread. probably the first smut(?) ive acc posted AHHAH
#suguru geto#suguru geto x reader#geto x reader#jjk x reader#jjk smut#geto x reader smut#suguru geto smut#suguru geto x reader smut#jjk#geto smut
562 notes
·
View notes
Text
just this once // ln4
still overwhelmed, still can't believe this this is getting to much attention 😭 ❤️🫶 THANK YOU FOR YOUR FEEDBACK AND YOUR RESPONSES I LOVE EVERY BIT OF IT
also why are my WORDS LIMITED???? I want to write MORE wtf tumblr
word count: 3.7k with some extras in the form of social media posts warnings: casual intimacy themes, secrecy, conflicts of loyalty, romantic tension and suggestive content includes: friends to lovers, fluff, best friends little sister, brothers best friend summary: after things cooled down for a little while, you have to face lando and your feelings once again... this time with consequences.
tag list: @sltwins @sarx164 @hadesnumber1daughter @fullmugwolffish @willowsnook @sageskiesf1 @f1fantasys @cmleitora @rawr-123s-stuff @leclercdream @chezmardybum @landossainz @cloud-55 @sillyfreakfanparty @harrysdimple05 @mwuaferrari @milkysoop
PART FOUR/2 previous part - next part
The sun dips low over the sky, painting it in shades of amber and rose as you finish getting ready. You’ve been pacing your hotel room for the last twenty minutes, debating whether you should even go to this dinner. Max made it sound casual, just friends and some of Lando’s crew, but the way your stomach twists tells you it’s anything but simple.
Since Monaco, things with Lando have been... complicated. He stayed over after Qualifying, the two of you wrapped in an unspoken agreement to keep things platonic. But nothing about the way he looked at you, the way his presence filled your space, felt friendly. Then there was the race—his P4 finish—and the small get-together afterward, where you both acted like nothing had happened. Since then, his schedule’s relentless pace kept you apart, exchanging only a few texts that danced around anything real. Just keeping in touch.
And now, this dinner.
You change into your favorite outfit, something understated but flattering, and force yourself to take a deep breath. It’s just a dinner. You’re friends, you tell yourself.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
yourusername London, United Kingdom
liked by user01 and others
yourusername back by popular demand
comments are disabled
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The restaurant hums with life as you step inside, trailing Max and Pietra. Warm light glints off polished wood and delicate glassware, and the buzz of conversation wraps around you like a soft blanket. You glance at the private room Max mentioned earlier, feeling your pulse quicken. You know who’s waiting there.
When you walk in, the first person you see is him. He’s tipped back in his chair at the head of the table, laughing at something someone said, his grin so easy and familiar it makes your chest ache. Then his eyes land on you, and for a moment, everything else in the room seems to blur.
“About time,” he says, standing up in one smooth motion. His voice is light, teasing, but there’s something in his gaze that sends a spark down your spine. He greets Max with an effortless handshake-hug, Pietra with a peck on the cheek, and then his attention falls to you.
“Stranger,” he says. “Lando,” you reply, keeping your voice even as you raise an eyebrow. His grin tilts, just a little lopsided, and the look in his eyes feels like a challenge.
The dinner is exactly what you expected—good food, great wine, and laughter that fills the space like it’s been waiting for all of you to show up. Max, seated on your right, is in big-brother mode, making sure you try everything and nudging your glass whenever it’s even close to empty. Across from you, Pietra chats animatedly with one of Lando’s friends, and you smile along, but your attention keeps drifting. Lando is at the far end of the table, surrounded by people who hang onto his every word. He’s effortlessly charismatic, telling some story you can’t quite hear, but that has everyone laughing. Except every now and then, his eyes meet yours, just for a second. It’s like he’s checking in, or maybe daring you to look away first.
You don’t.
When he gets up to refill his drink, he passes behind you, his hand brushing lightly over your shoulder. The touch is so brief, so casual, that no one else notices. But it sends a shiver through you anyway. “Having fun?” he murmurs, his voice low and private, meant just for you. “Loads,” you reply, trying to sound unimpressed even as heat rises to your cheeks.
His chuckle is soft, almost affectionate, before he moves away. You tell yourself to focus, to ignore the way your heart is beating just a little too fast.
Later, the table splits into smaller conversations, and somehow, Lando ends up next to you. Max is too busy laughing at something Pietra said to notice when Lando leans in, his shoulder brushing yours. “This is torture,” he says under his breath, his knee knocking lightly against yours under the table. Your throat goes dry. “What is?” “You. Wearing this dress.” His voice is teasing, but there’s an edge to it that makes you hold your breath.
You don’t know how to respond, and for a moment, you just sit there, the noise of the room fading into the background. Then Max glances over, and Lando straightens, all easy charm again. “What are you two whispering about?” Max asks, his eyes narrowing suspiciously. Lando doesn’t miss a beat. “Just telling your sister she has terrible taste in wine.”
“Hey!” you protest, and the table laughs. Max shakes his head, rolling his eyes. “Don’t listen to him. He drinks that sparkling stuff like it’s water.” The conversation moves on, and you pretend everything is normal, even as Lando’s knee stays pressed against yours under the table. And you don’t move away.
As the laughter around the table flows easily, your own chuckle gets caught in your throat when Lando leans back in his chair, stretching casually, but you don’t miss the way his knee once again brushes against yours under the table. It’s subtle, almost as if he’s testing to see how long he can get away with it without anyone noticing. Your pulse quickens, and you do your best to focus on Pietra, who’s telling an animated story about a mishap at her last work event.
But Lando is… distracting. His words replay in your head on an endless loop—”this is torture”—and you swear you can still feel the ghost of his knee against yours under the table. It’s maddening, really. The ease with which he teases you under Max’s nose, how effortlessly he switches back to joking with the group like he didn’t just upend your entire sense of composure.
You glance his way and catch him smirking, like he knows exactly what he’s doing. His focus shifts back to his drink, but there’s a flicker of something in his expression—playful yet deliberate—that makes it impossible to ignore him. You try to shake it off. You tell yourself that it’s just Lando being Lando: cheeky, teasing, good at making people feel... something. Just like always. Except this doesn’t feel like always, and that’s the problem. You’re trying to focus on the ongoing conversation. Something about summer plans, maybe? You’re not even sure anymore. Lando is leaning back in his chair again now, one arm draped lazily over the back of his seat, looking every bit like someone who hasn’t a care in the world. But he keeps glancing at you when he thinks no one else will notice.
“Alright,” Max announces suddenly, clapping his hands together as if he’s about to make a grand proclamation. “Drinks back at mine?” There’s a chorus of agreement around the table as chairs start scraping against the floor and people gather their things. You hesitate, glancing at your phone like you might have an excuse to slip away. But before you can concoct some half-hearted reason to head back to the hotel, Pietra loops an arm through yours, effectively trapping you. “You’re coming, right?” although she forms it as a question, you know it’s really not.
“I wouldn’t want to miss out,” you reply lightly, smiling at Pietra. Who, satisfied with your response, let’s go of you to join Max again. Your stomach twists again when you see Lando standing by the door, your coat in his hands, waiting like he has all the time in the world. His curls are a little messy, his grin lazy, yet sharp as his eyes meet yours in the dim light. It’s as if he can sense your hesitation and is daring you to pull away. “Come on, stranger,” he says softly, leaning just close enough that his voice feels like it’s wrapping around you. “Can’t bail now.” You narrow your eyes at him, trying to ignore the way your heart jumps at the way he towers ever so slightly over you. “I didn’t say I was bailing.” “No?” His gaze drops briefly to your phone in your hand, then flicks back up to catch yours. “Good,” he says, his voice dipping lower, quieter. “Because I wasn’t going to let you.”
It’s infuriating how easily he gets under your skin. With a huff of mock-annoyance—because genuine annoyance is impossible when he’s looking at you like that—you slide your arms into the coat he’s still holding and step away before the spark between you burns any brighter.
The group spills out into the cool night air, laughter echoing down the cobblestone street as everyone makes their way toward Max’s flat. Pietra loops her arm through yours again, chatting about some new café she wants to try tomorrow for breakfast. The walk to Max’s place is short, but it feels like an eternity with Lando so close behind you in the group. Every step feels charged, like there’s an invisible string stretched taut between the two of you. You try not to think about what he said earlier—or how his knee pressed against yours, or how warm his hand had been on your shoulder at dinner—but it’s useless. He’s inescapable, even when he isn’t touching you.
When you finally reach Max's apartment, everyone else appears calm and carefree. However, you have come to the realization that you can no longer let Lando do this to you. You don’t know if he isn’t aware of the drama it would cause if Max found out or if he just doesn’t care about the consequences—you however do care about the consequences. While never openly spoken about, you know how your brother would feel about this. He’d hate it. Lando is his best friend and you are his little sister. Two things that, frankly, shouldn’t mingle so close. So you make the decision to talk to Lando tonight.
It’s not like you don’t care or that you don’t feel things when you’re around him, but is acting on it really worth the pain it could and would cause?
Eventually everyone is spread across the living room, laughing and reminiscing, the buzz of good drinks and great music keeping the energy alive. You’re perched on the arm of the couch, balancing your drink as Pietra chats animatedly beside you. Across the room, Lando lounges in a chair, looking infuriatingly relaxed, his attention shifting to you every few minutes. It’s subtle, the way his gaze lingers just a fraction too long, but you feel it—like a spark skittering across your skin. You pretend not to notice, focusing on Pietra's story about her disastrous attempt at paddleboarding last summer. But when Lando catches your eye mid-sentence, raising his brow in a silent tease, your stomach flips.
Max comes in from the kitchen, holding a fresh beer, his presence immediately commanding attention. “Alright, whose idea was it to leave me in charge of snacks?” he announces. “I could barely find some crisps, let alone figure out this sweets situation.”
Pietra groans. “Max, it’s literally all in the cupboard. You just have to put it in some bowls.”
“But that’s where you put them!” Max protests, plopping down beside Pietra. His knee bumps yours, but his focus is on his girlfriend, who shakes her head fondly. Lando seizes the moment to move closer, taking the newly vacated spot on the couch next to you. “You okay there?” he murmurs, low enough that only you can hear. “Perfectly fine,” you shoot back, matching his tone with a pointed glare. But your attempt at indifference falters when his knee brushes yours—deliberately, you’re sure. “You’re really gonna keep your distance tonight, are you?” he asks, his voice light but carrying that edge of challenge that makes your heart race. “I am sitting next to you,” you counter, swirling your drink for effect. “You’re just mad I’m busy talking to everyone else tonight.” He chuckles softly, the sound brushing against your skin like velvet. “Give it time.”
Before you can respond, Max’s voice cuts through the room. “What are you two whispering about now?” His tone is joking, but there’s a hint of suspicion there that makes you stiffen. “Just telling your sister she needs to get some updated LN4 merch for the weekend,” Lando says smoothly, leaning back like he doesn’t have a care in the world. “Excuse me?” you retort, feigning outrage. “That stuff is expensive, genius.” The group erupts into laughter, and Max shakes his head, rolling his eyes. “Of course, it is. You should stick to the Quadrant merch anyhow.”
"Hey now," Lando protests with a grin, "I'm hurt, Max. Thought we were friends." The conversation shifts, but you can't shake the tension thrumming beneath your skin. Lando's presence beside you is electric, and you're acutely aware of every subtle movement he makes. You try to focus on the others, laughing at the right moments and nodding along, but your mind keeps drifting back to the man next to you. While Lando's quick thinking may have diffused the situation, it only reinforces your resolve to talk to him. You need to set things straight before they spiral out of control.
As the night wears on, you find yourself growing more and more restless. You've been careful to mingle with everyone, pointedly avoiding extended conversations with Lando. But his presence is a constant, hovering at the edge of your awareness. You catch his eye across the room more than once, and each time, that familiar spark ignites in your chest.
Finally, as the party begins to wind down, you see your chance. Lando slips out onto the balcony, and after a moment's hesitation, you follow. The cool night air is a relief after the warmth of the apartment, and for a moment, you just stand there, letting it wash over you. "Thought you might follow me out here," Lando says softly, not turning around. He's leaning against the railing, his profile illuminated by the city lights below. You take a deep breath, steeling yourself. "Lando, we need to talk."
He turns to face you, his expression unreadable in the dim light. "I was wondering when you'd say that," he says softly, a hint of resignation in his voice. You step closer, careful to keep some distance between you. The city sprawls below, a tapestry of twinkling lights and distant sounds, but your focus narrows to the man in front of you. The air feels thick with unspoken words and simmering tension.
"This... whatever this is," you begin, gesturing vaguely between the two of you, "it needs to stop." Lando's brow furrows, a flash of hurt crossing his features before he schools his expression. "What exactly are you referring to?" he asks, his tone carefully neutral. You take a deep breath, steeling yourself. "The touches. The looks. The... the way you've been pushing boundaries tonight. It's not fair, Lando." Your words hang in the air between you, heavy with implication. Lando's jaw clenches, a muscle twitching as he processes what you've said. For a moment, the only sound is the distant hum of the city below and the muffled laughter from inside.
"Not fair?" Lando repeats, his voice low but charged with emotion. "What's not fair is pretending there's nothing between us." He takes a step closer, his eyes searching yours in the dim light. "Do you really want to ignore this? To act like we don't feel anything when we're around each other?" You bite your lip, trying to ignore the way your heart races at his proximity. "Lando, it's not that simple. Max is your best friend, and he's my brother. We can't just—"
"Can't what?" he interrupts, his voice rising slightly. "Can't be honest about how we feel? Can't take a chance on something that could be amazing?"—"Shh!" you hiss, glancing nervously at the sliding glass door. "Keep your voice down. Do you want everyone to hear?" Lando runs a hand through his curls, frustration evident in every line of his body. "Maybe I do," he says, though he lowers his voice. "Maybe I'm tired of sneaking around, of pretending I don't want to be near you every second we're in the same room."
His words send a shiver down your spine, and you struggle to maintain your composure. "It's not just about us," you argue, your voice rising slightly. "What about Max? He's your best friend, Lando. How do you think he'd react?" Lando's eyes flash with a mix of frustration and determination. "I care about Max, you know I do. But I'm not going to let fear of his reaction dictate my life. Or my feelings." You glance nervously towards the sliding glass door, worried that your raised voices might carry inside. The last thing you need is for someone to come investigate. "Please, keep your voice down," you hiss, even as your own emotions threaten to overwhelm you. "No," Lando says, his tone firm but not unkind. "I'm tired of keeping quiet about this. About us." He takes another step closer, close enough that you can smell his cologne, a mixture of citrus and something woody that makes your head spin. His proximity is intoxicating, and you find yourself swaying towards him almost unconsciously.
"Lando," you breathe, your resolve weakening with every passing second. The city lights dance in his eyes, casting shadows across his face that only enhance his features. You can see the determination there, the longing, and it mirrors the ache in your own chest. But he's not listening. His eyes are locked on yours, dark and intense in the city lights. "I can't keep pretending," he murmurs, his voice low and husky. "Can you?" And before you can answer, before you can even think, he closes the distance between you.
His lips crash against yours, urgent and desperate. For a heartbeat, you're frozen, caught between shock and desire. Then, as if a dam has broken, you're kissing him back with equal fervor. Your hands find their way to his curls, fingers tangling in the soft strands as his arms wrap around your waist, pulling you flush against him. The world narrows to this moment—the taste of him, the warmth of his body, the way your heart threatens to burst from your chest.
It's everything you've been trying to deny, everything you've been afraid to want, distilled into a single, burning instant.
But reality crashes back in like a bucket of ice water, and you jerk away, your eyes wide with panic, breathing hard, your lips tingling and your mind reeling. "We can't," you whisper, your voice trembling. "Lando, we can't do this." Even as every fiber of your being screams to pull him close again. Lando's eyes are wide, his chest heaving as he stares at you, looking as stunned as you feel.
Before he can respond, the sound of the balcony door sliding open makes you both freeze. You take a hasty step back, your heart pounding so loudly you're sure everyone can hear it. Max steps out onto the balcony, his eyes narrowing as he takes in the scene before him. You and Lando are standing suspiciously close, both of you looking flushed and slightly disheveled. The air between you crackles with tension, and for a moment, the only sound is the distant hum of the city below.
"What's going on out here?" Max asks, his tone light but laced with suspicion. His gaze flicks between you and Lando, searching for answers in your expressions. Lando, ever quick on his feet, lets out a low whistle and gestures broadly at the cityscape. "Just admiring the view, mate," he says, his voice only slightly strained. "Can't beat a night like this, can you?" You nod enthusiastically, perhaps a bit too eagerly. "It's gorgeous," you agree, willing your racing heart to slow. "I was just telling Lando how I could stay out here all night."
Max leans against the doorframe, his arms crossed over his chest. The look he gives you is one you've known since childhood—the one that says he's not quite buying what you're selling. "Really?" he drawls. "Because from where I was standing, it looked like you two were having a pretty intense conversation."
You feel your face flush as Max's gaze bores into you, his expression a mixture of concern and growing suspicion. The air on the balcony suddenly feels thick, charged with an uncomfortable tension that even the cool night breeze can't dispel. The city lights twinkle innocently behind you, a stark contrast to the tension crackling in the air. You open your mouth to respond, but the words stick in your throat. Lando shifts beside you, and you can feel the heat radiating off him, a reminder of what just transpired.
"Max," Lando starts, his voice steady despite the circumstances. But Max holds up a hand, silencing him. "Max," Lando repeats, forcing a laugh that sounds hollow even to your ears. "Mate. We were just..."—"No," Max says, his tone sharp. "I want to hear it from my sister." His gaze locks onto you, and suddenly you feel like you're fifteen again, caught sneaking out to a party. Except this is so much worse.
You take a deep breath, willing your voice not to shake. "Max, it's not—"
"Don't," he interrupts, his eyes flashing. "Don't lie to me. I've seen the way you two have been acting all night. The whispers, the looks. And now I find you out here, alone, looking like..." He gestures vaguely at your disheveled appearance. Your stomach drops as you realize the jig is up. Max's eyes narrow as he looks between you and Lando, taking in your flushed faces, the slight dishevelment of Lando's curls where your fingers had been moments ago.
The silence stretches between you, heavy with unspoken truths. You can hear the muffled sounds of the party inside, laughter and music that seems to belong to another world entirely. A cool breeze ruffles your hair, carrying with it the scent of the city and the faintest trace of Lando's cologne.
"How long?" Max asks, his voice barely above a whisper. "How long has this been going on?" You open your mouth to speak, but no words come out. Lando steps forward, his shoulder brushing yours in a gesture that feels both protective and defiant. "Max," he begins, his voice steady despite the tension thrumming through his body. "It's not what you think."
"Oh really?" Max's laugh is bitter, cutting through the night air like a knife. "Because what I think is that my best friend and my sister have been sneaking around behind my back. Am I wrong?"
447 notes
·
View notes
Text
Odd One Out
JJ Maybank x fem!reader
Summary: Reader feels invisible around the Pogues.
Warnings: Crying, feeling strongly excluded, comfort, mention of disease, etc.
Note: I know this wasn’t part of my “Future Stories” post, but it’s been a side story for too long so I decided to post it! Hope you like it!
Masterlist
“I’m tellin’ ya, pineapple doesn’t belong on pizza, that’s uh,” Pope chuckled at the silly conversation of debate whether the topping belongs on the delicious food or not before finishing his sentence, “the end of discussion. Debate closed.”
The whole room was still trying to wear off its laughter, a few people still going off in a fit before calming down again.
The girl was laughing too, just a lot softer and less full of….what’s the word….happiness.
Most of the time she didn’t know what the jokes were about, or the little references they would whisper to each other were on the topic of. It didn’t help the fact that she was sitting away from the majority of the group, the one sitter arm chair away from the couch they crowded.
She still remembers the encounter of them practically pushing her away from the group, forcing her to sit on the chair alone. She had walked in with them, all of them still laughing at some joke JJ said but of course she couldn’t get a word in on what he spoke at all, for she was always in the back of the group anyhow. The friends had walked in the house, one by one plopping on the couch or on the floor in front of it, so there wasn’t a single little space for her to squeeze in.
If she thought back deeper and shut her eyes, she could still feel the stare they laid upon her, waiting to see her point of action towards the matter. It was almost like they didn’t like her, like if she went near one of the particular that very person would be the unlucky girl or boy to have to deal with her for the rest of the hang out.
So yeah, her cheeks flushed deep red as she stumbled over crossed legs and ankles towards the back of the room, muttering soft pathetic apologies before sitting in the very chair she is sitting in now.
Now it wasn’t so bad, just that she was in the back, meaning all she could see were backs of heads and once in a while profiles. So the bit of participation she wished she had was no longer available, so now she was sitting in the chair, her legs crossed apple sauce style so they wouldn’t accidentally kick someone.
JJ was so close. So close that all she had to do in order to talk to him was tap him on the shoulder. He would turn around and talk to her and smile, giving her one of those blue eye sparkles. Maybe then she’d-
If she kept thinking like this she’d never be able to participate in the conversation. So she forced out a chuckle, trying to ease herself in.
Maybe she could squeeze her own voice in with all the others? If there’s room for them there has to be room for her too, right?
“One time I went to a pizza shop and-“
Her voice dyed out, the response being absolutely nothing. No eye contact, no expression change, not even a glance from anyone, almost like they didn’t even hear her.
She was speaking loud enough, the same volume of everyone else, but she also didn’t want to talk over the whole group just for a grab of attention.
So the conversation she wasn’t included in continued, someone else’s voice covering hers.
That someone else being Kiera, who of course everyone has to pay attention to. “Yeah, I agree, no more pineapple on pizza talk, maybe we should get actual pizza.” She suggested, and everyone loved the sound of that.
So did she, her stomach being the other thing she was thinking about besides the fact she wasn’t being included. She got up with the others, heading out the door behind JJ.
If she just tapped him on the shoulder-
He closed the door. Maybe he didn’t see her, since there was a corner to go around before exiting the house, but he didn’t forget about her, right?
She stared at the closed door, the past events causing small tears to arise in her eyes.
No.
She can’t cry just because someone closed the door in her face. It was such a small thing, a small action of a mistake he might’ve made. She almost expected him to come back, staring at the handle to see if it would twist, awaiting his face to pop in and apologize for the little thing he did.
But he never came.
She took a sharp breath in, reaching forward for the handle herself and leaving the house.
The group was outside piling into the Twinkie, talking about. She went to the side door too, hoping she could squeeze in somewhere.
But all the seats were full, and all the pitiful eyes were on her.
“Oh, there’s no room. Maybe you could drive in your car and meet us there?” Sarah suggested, and it was the first time that day they spoke directly to her. And it should’ve been something she enjoyed, like a little invitation to join the conversation or an offer to squeeze next to someone, them willing to be a little bit uncomfortable just so she could join.
But it was something she wished didn’t happen, because why did she even go to the side of the car in the first place? Did she really think there would be room for her?
“Or someone could squeeze over..?” Sarah trailed off, looking over at the rooms of people, and the girl couldn’t help but notice how John B moved closer to the edge with the window, covering a small space. Her heart broke.
“Or ya could sit on my lap, Princess.” She heard JJ chuckle, and she glanced at him, her broken little heart believing him for a second, her cheeks softly flushing, before realizing it was a joke. Some people laughed, Kie smacking JJ on the arm but there was a smirk on her lips.
The girl cleared her throat awkwardly, fiddling with her hands, all eyes still on her.
“Yeah, I’m not gonna go anymore, I’ll just go home…I’m not feeling so well.” She had to come up with some excuse, some ticket to get out of there, not like they would miss her at all.
She just walked away, heading to the sidewalk to walk home. Alone.
No one wished her well, despite her lie, but she still wished to at least get a “get well soon” or a “goodbye”.
Nothing. Just pity looks as she walked away, not long before chatter filled the car once more and they drove off.
She didn’t feel like eating anymore, despite her stomach yelling at her because she missed the only chance to eat; they would probably make her pay for her own meal anyway.
So she headed home, arms crossed as tears finally made their way down her cheeks. It hurt, the concept of not being included. She was the nickel out of all the pennies. They were all tan skin and smiles, considering themselves lucky because they found each other, very similar to being lucky when you find a penny. But she was all silver and plain, having a different engraving on her and being a different size than everyone else; they were all small and sweet, yet she was the biggest fool out of all of them.
She hated being a nickel. What did she have to do to be a penny?
She didn’t know, and that right there made her cry harder. She wiped at the tears but nothing worked, for whole rivers were already down her face by now. Her heart cracked, she felt it, because she knew if John B moved over just a little there would be enough room for her to sit with them.
But he didn’t want that. He didn’t want to sit next to her, like she was some sort of disgusting disease that he didn’t want to catch.
All she wanted was to be included, to feel loved and fit in by them. But she’ll always be the odd one out.
She fell asleep crying, and woke up hungry since she skipped dinner the day before.
She got out of bed, seeing her red-eyed self in the mirror while brushing her teeth.
She decided to go out today, to JJ’s house.
Now, it didn’t seem like a good decision, but she needed comfort and he was the only person she knew that would provide it. Maybe she would tell him how she’s feeling, not the crying all the way home part, and he would assure her he likes her in the group.
At least that’s what her brain told her he’d say.
Because her mother wouldn’t understand, plus she had other things to deal with, and she didn’t want to bother her father with all the work loads he had on his mind.
But JJ, he was the shiniest penny of all of them, and he seems like the only person to trust. Sadly she didn’t forget about the joke he made the day prior, suggesting she sat on his lap, but it was a one time thing and he could’ve been peer pressured to make it.
That’s what her brain kept telling her.
But the morning was sunny and warm, practically begging for her to enjoy it so she couldn’t refuse.
She put on some Jean shorts and a sun shirt, putting some knitted bracelets on her wrist because she saw everyone else wearing one; plus they were fun to make.
She had made one for JJ, his two favorite colors she overheard him reveal tied into the bracelet. She was gonna bring it to his house, maybe have the courage to give it to him.
She got to his house on foot, spotting his blob of blonde hair behind his car hood, where it normally was.
She shyly made her way over, gazing at his car to pass time. She liked how rusty it was, showing its age but it was still quite clean, like it was his prize possession. (It probably was)
“She looks good, doesn’t she?”
She flinched, looking over at him and making eye contact. His blues were something she admired, but looking directly into them overwhelmed her so she looked away. He chuckled.
One of the main reasons why she went to him was because JJ was the type of person who could talk to anybody. He knew the words to say or the way to talk to make the person comfortable (friend wise that is.)
She hoped he would do just that while he talks to her, and so far so good.
She nodded in response, hands in her back pockets of her shorts and fiddling with the bracelet she made him.
“Yeah, looks great.” She assured, despite the fact that she knew he already knew that, but then again it was all worth the smirk he gave in response, leaning back into the hood.
“What’s wrong with it?” She had the courage to ask, hands out of her pockets now and fingers fiddling together.
He shook his head. “Absolutely nothin’, just had to replace the engine.”
She smiled softly at that, glad that there wasn’t anything severely wrong with his car. “That’s good.”
He nodded, clearly half listening but she knew it was only because he was so focused on the task at hand.
They fell into silence for a little bit, and she was kinda glad he didn’t ask why she was there, mainly because she needed time to build up the courage to start the topic.
“Hey, JJ?” She blurted out, forcing her lips to move. Her heart started beating quite quickly. He looked up at her briefly at the acknowledgment before glancing back down, letting her know he was listening.
“Mm?” He hummed.
“Um,” she started, fiddling with her hands harder than before and trying to ignore the surprisingly annoying racing of her heart. “I noticed yesterday-“
“You noticed the toilet paper I put on John B’s shoe? You didn’t tell him, did you?” He interrupted, his eyes sparkling as he looked at her. She’s always wanted an eye sparkle from him, that meant the topic was mischievous and exciting for him.
But now wasn’t the time, for she needed to get to the point before her courage wore off. “Well, no, I didn’t tell him, but-“
He let out a sigh of relief. “Good, I wanted it to be there when we went to get pizza, which…”
He slowly trailed off, realizing she wasn’t there when they went out.
She swallowed nervously, feeling her cheeks flush. “Yeah, whatever, anyway, I really need to talk to you about something.”
She was satisfied that she could get that sentence out, for the courage in her chest hasn’t left yet.
His face drew back, twisting with confusion but he looked okay with it. “Okay, what’s up, sugar?” He said casually, leaning back down and popping the old engine out, lifting it before placing on the ground.
Her cheeks flushed red at the nickname, but brushed it off so she could stay on task. She kept telling herself that talking to him would help, so she really wanted to get her point across.
“Um, well, I’m feeling a bit, I don’t know, like I don’t…belong.”
The word: belong. It was something she always wanted to do, something she would die just for a taste of being it. It was something she so wanted to be that she held the word close to her heart, holding onto it tightly so it wouldn’t leave her. It was slowly fighting back against her grip ever since she met the group, yet she wanted friends so badly she kept trying.
She stared at JJ to see his reaction, watching as he lifted the new engine towards the car hood. He must have felt her stare because why else would he look up, eyes looking as clueless as ever.
“Did you say something?” He said, scratching his head, closing the hood.
“What?” She pathetically whispered, tears welling up but she blinked them away. She cleared her throat. “N-no, I didn’t say anything. I was gonna say I made this for you.”
Her voice was soft and helpless, setting the bracelet on the now closed hood of the car after taking it out of her pocket. He stared at it, eyes softening slightly before looking up, meeting her glossy eyes.
“I-I hope you like it,” She said, voice thick and her lips were quivering, tears so close to bursting themselves out.
“Woah, what’s wrong?” He said, stepping around his car and reaching for her, but she snatched her wrist out of his reach.
“You weren’t listening to me!” She sputtered. “Just like everyone else.”
“I’m sorry.” Was all he could get out because he was in shock at her outburst. Normally she is the quiet cute girl in the corner, now her eyebrows were furrowed in anger and her cheeks were red. Smoke was practically coming out of her ears.
“Sorry?” She quoted. “I have been feeling like this for weeks, and I finally had the courage to talk to someone, that someone being you of all people because I had a speck of hope that you would listen but when I do you can’t do that just this once?!”
“Feeling like what?” He said- almost demanded- his eyebrows furrowing. She threw her arms in the air in asasperation at his response, like out of the whole outburst she expressed the only thing he heard was that little part. “Does it even matter?” She almost yelled. “You had one chance to listen and you didn’t take it. If you cared you would’ve listened.”
“I do care, sugar,” he desperately assured. “I didn’t know you needed my full attention. I should’ve listened, and I’m sorry.”
“It doesn’t even matter anymore, forget about it, JJ,” she said, wiping her cheeks before turning away.
“No no talk to me, princess. I’m listening I promise,” he whispered, dirty fingers curved around her wrist.
She turned to him, desire for someone to listen to her was strong.
Once he knew she wasn’t gonna leave, he let go of her wrist, the warmth from his touch leaving her. She fiddled with her fingers, looking into his eyes that seemed so sincere.“You promise?”
He nodded almost instantly. “I promise.”
He even held out his pinkie to her, making her laugh but seal the promise nonetheless.
The rest of the morning they sat and talked, JJ’s smile as big as ever and the threads tied around his wrist.
She laughed.
Laughed.
And she actually got to hear his jokes for once. The ones she missed, misheard, and never repeated for her.
And those sounds were as genuine as they could get, her heart singing as he gave her a real eye twinkle.
It was at that moment her heart fell, fell hard for the boy next to her.
And at their next hangout she didn’t have to sit on the chair alone like she normally does, for now she got to see on Maybank’s lap (as offered) as she laughed with the group and got to have her say.
She felt loved. Felt like she was included.
And, most important of all, she felt belonged.
-Tell me what you think? 🫶🏻
#jj maybank x reader#jj x fem reader#jj x y/n#outer banks#outer banks imagines#jj maybank#jj maybank x fem!reader#outer banks x reader#jj maybank fluff#outer banks fluff#outer banks angst#JJ maybank x reader angst
429 notes
·
View notes
Text
sharing is caring
your boyfriend isagi lets his best friend bachira fuck you while he watches (mostly)
bachira, isagi x f!reader ☆ smut ☆ 0.8k cw: dirty talk(its bad), penetration, cucking, squirting, rough sex, threesome a/n: reupload from ao3. gulp... ive actually been debating whether or not i should post it because i actually feel so embarrassed about it like i cant believe i typed that with my own fingies but my friend convinced me to post it so for my own wellbeing all the smut will be under the cut because i'll start convulsing if i read it against my will :)
☆
how you got into this predicament you weren’t sure. the events leading up to this blurry and hard to even try to remember. all you could think about was now. the present reality being you leaning back against your boyfriend isagi while his best friend bachira fucks into you.
“ah shit isagi- she’s so- fuck- so tight-,” bachiras onslaught of crude words made you helplessly clench around his dick. with your legs behind held up and open by isagi, you were getting mercilessly pounded into. you could hear isagi chuckle darkly from right behind you, his hard clothed dick pressing into your lower back as he squeezed your thighs.
“dont forget to play with her clit bachira,” isagi’s voice was light, playful as he let go of one of your legs to grope at your breasts instead. “wanna feel her cum on you dont you,”
“f-fuck yeah- yeah i do,” without a second of delay he lets a ball of spit fall from his lips, both men’s eyes watching as it fell down right above your sensitive clit. the groan isagi let out had your hips bucking into bachira which just fueled him even more. “you’ll cum for me right y/n? you’ll cum on my dick right? your boyfriend said it’s okay so go ahead,” you whined as bachira kept his eyes on you. there was something unnerving in his eyes and the unwavering desperate smile he had.
“a-ah fuck-,” you couldn’t help but moan at the feeling of bachira pressing his thumb onto your neglected clit, pressing his fingers into your lower abdomen as he moved his thumb in tight circles.
“y/n you sound so good- hah- cum for me baby please- wanna feel it bad,” he was babbling now, head hung low as he continued to drill himself into you. the room was filled with both you and bachira’s moans along with the wet slapping of his tight balls on your cunt.
isagi, getting a tad jealous, wanted you to direct some of your attention back to him. hooking a finger under your jaw he tilted your head up and sideways to look at him before he placed his wet lips on yours.
“shit thats so hot- so hot-,” meguru’s eyes shot up when he heard your muffled moan, almost cuming right then at the sight of his teammate taking control over your mouth, “i’m close- gonna cum- pretty baby how ‘bout you ask your boyfriend where i should cum,” isagi eyes meguru as he sucked on your tongue, a slight smirk tugging at his lips at how fucked out meguru looked.
“you can’t cum until she does,” isagi’s authoritative tone has bachira’s hips stuttering. with a small whine leaving his lips, he brings his thumb back to your clit, circling it roughly.
“cum y/n please cum- i need it- hah fuckfuck- please i- i need-,”
“shit bachira- right there right there- dont stop,” your moaning had both of their dicks twitching, their eyes locking once before a dry chuckle leaves isagi.
“better keep going bachira make my pretty girl feel good she deserves it,” his voice was teasing as he left kisses along your temple, holding your lower face in his hand as he kept your eyes directed onto the scene in front of you.
“call me meguru- fuck baby please say it say my name,” bachira was panting now, babbling away as he tried so hard to not cum. he needed you to cum. needed to feel you cum around and call his name.
“meguru i’m cum- im cumming ah shitshitshit,” before you had even a moment to realize what was happening, you were squirting around his dick. you were all but seeing stars as isagi reached a hand down to slap at your clit as meguru pulled out.
“ fuck you’re so hot- squirting on me like that fucck-,” both you and meguru were a fucked out mess as isagi continued to abuse your clit and bachira kept bullying his cock before he came onto your stomach.
“yoichi- ‘s too much- w-wait-,” you squirmed in isagis hold as he continued to fuck you through your orgasm. his eyes were wide and fixated on your squirting cunt, having not ever seen you do that before. bachira watched with hungry eyes as the sheets below turned dark with your cum, your squirt soaking his dick and thighs.
you began to tear up at the stimulation, desperate moans leaving your mouth as you told isagi it was too much but to keep going. having never seen isagi so dominating, bachira didn’t look away when isagi jerked your head towards him, ordering you to open your mouth before spitting inside. bachira could feel his dick getting hard all over again just from the filthy sight alone.
“fucked her so good you made her squirt,” isagi muttered as he kept his eyes on your cunt. there was no way in hell he was going to tell bachira that he was the first one to do so. “ ‘m gonna fuck her now ‘n since you were so nice to her-,” isagi was quick to reposition you so you were straddling him, laying your head on his chest as you tried to even out your breathing “i’ll let you fuck her ass,”
i hope you enjoyed !! reblogs/comments are very much appreciated <3
#bachira x reader#bachira x you#meguru x reader#meguru x you#bachira meguru#meguru bachira#meguru smut#bachira smut#bachira meguru smut#meguru bachira smut#bachira meguru x reader#meguru bachira x reader#bachira blue lock#bachira bllk#isagi x reader#isagi x you#yoichi x reader#yoichi x you#isagi yoichi#yoichi isagi#yoichi smut#isagi smut#isagi yoichi smut#yoichi isagi smut#isagi yoichi x reader#yoichi isagi x reader#isagi blue lock#isagi bllk#bllk#blue lock smut
572 notes
·
View notes
Text
Scary Dog Privilege
Her werewolf boyfriends want to know what's more important, scary dog privilege or scary boyfriend privilege
Viv's AUgust Event
(Banner by @nurse-floyd)
It was a genuine debate between her boyfriends, one had as they laid in bed, wrapped together in that usual post sex haze, and she wanted to go out for a walk.
It was a stupid debate, one that didn't actually matter. But they still battled it out like the answer could bring a out world peace.
You might be asking yourself, what was the debate about?
What has more validity, scary dog privileges or scary boyfriend privilages? Luckily, she was in the position to find out.
(Not luckily, because she just wanted her boyfriends to be normal about something. She didn't understand why they were goddamn insistent on having it out about this when it just didn't matter. They were infuriating and she hated them. Well, she loved them a lot more than she hated them, but still).
She pulled her boots onto her feet and stood up. "Hurry up if you wanna come with me," she said and grabbed her keys from the top of the dresser.
Daniel climbed out of the bed. His body changed, thick, brown fur sprouting from his skin, bones snapping and reshaping into something new, teeth growing and becoming pointed. It sounded like a very painful process, but her boys assured her that it wasn't.
Max pulled on Daniel's shirt and a pair of shorts. Just dressed for a walk with his girl and their... dog, he supposed. "You're gonna have to wear a lead," Max said, grabbing the collars and leads they kept in the top of the wardrobe.
(They didn't keep the leads for anything kinky, for any sort of bedroom activities. It had come about after the boys had insisted walking to the street with her. They'd nearly gotten her fined for not having them on a lead, so they'd fixed it.)
Daniel growled and nipped at Max's fingers as he fastened the collar around his neck. Not too tight, Daniel could have gotten it off easily if he tried.
As soon as he was ready, they headed out of their Monaco apartment. Max held her hand, held the lead that attached them to Daniel. "Could you not have just stayed human?" She asked as she scratched behind his ears.
People were on the streets of Monaco, but nobody came up to them. Whether that was because of 'Scary Dog Privilege' or 'Scary Boyfriend Privilege', they weren't sure. But the walk was nice, just the three of them together. Even if Daniel insisted on staying changed.
When they returned back to their apartment, Daniel changed back. He didn't care that he was naked as they day he was born as he grabbed a drink. "I think we should test it out," he said as he walked into their bedroom.
"Test what out?" She asked as she sat beside Max and threw her leg over his lap.
Max sighed as his hand settled over her thigh. "Daniel wants to know if scary dog will keep you safe or scary boyfriend."
"No," she said immediately as she sat back, taking her leg from his lap. "Can you guys be normal for once, please? I just want to go for a walk with my fucking boyfriends sometimes." She released a huff and folded her arms across her chest.
Daniel walked out of the bedroom, dressed in something cosy. His hands were on her shoulders, squeezing. "I'm sorry," he mumbled and leaned down to kiss her head. "No more scary dog privileges, I promise. Just scary boyfriend privileges."
In response she grabbed him and pulled him between her and Max. "Forgiven," she said and climbed on top of him. Max grinned as he watched them. He leaned down, threaded his fingers through Daniels curls and kissed him.
She pushed Max out of the way and took his place, lips against Daniels. "I don't mind scary dog privileges," she mumbled against his lips. "Just not all of the time, okay?"
His hands travelled beneath her shirt, fingers heating her skin. "Okay," he agreed and pulled her on top of him.
#max verstappen#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen x you#daniel ricciardo#daniel ricciardo x reader#daniel ricciardo imagine#daniel ricciardo fluff#daniel ricciardo x you#f1#formula one#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1#formula one imagine#formula one x reader#formula 1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#maxiel fluff#maxiel imagine#maxiel x reader#maxiel#werewolf au
473 notes
·
View notes
Note
Omg wait imagine when JJ notices you like messing with his rings, he gets a fidget ring that you can spin whenever you're bored(I have one and they're rlly fun lmao)
ahhhh yes!!! I didn’t even know this was a thing lol!!!
jj debated on whether he should let you pick out a fidget ring for him, or if he should just get one and have it be a surprise for you.
He decided to go with the latter, figuring that you would want to pick him out another one at some point.
You had arrived at the chateau after a long day of work, wanting nothing more than to curl up in bed with your boyfriend. Working two doubles in a row was not for the weak.
“Hey sweet thing, how was work?” jj sat up from his spot on the couch as you swung open the door, kicking your shoes off and setting your purse on the counter as you made your way across the room to your boyfriend who had waited up for you as you didn’t get off work until 11.
You sighed as jj pulled you into his lap, wrapping his arms around your waist to keep you close.
“Oh, just peachy.” You grumbled, exhausted from spending 12 hours using your ‘customer service voice.’
“Mm,” jj hummed as he pressed his lips to your neck, leaving little kisses up and down the skin, “I’m just glad you’re home now, baby.”
You tilted your head, a smile tugging at your lips before you placed your hands on his chest, softly nudging him back a bit.
“I feel gross right now. Wanna shower with me?” You asked, and jj wasted absolutely no time before swooping you into his arms and carrying you into the bathroom as you giggled.
“Yes, ma’am.”
After a nice shower that basically just consisted of the two of your groping each other the entire time, you ended up in bed.
You finally felt yourself fully relax for the night as you lay your head on your boyfriend’s chest after a post shower quickie, your half naked bodies pressed against each other.
You instinctively reached for jj’s hands, taking ahold of the closest one in reach to you, sighing as you gently played with his fingers, already feeling your eyelids grow more tired by the second.
You were practically seconds away from sleep, at this point just lazily messing with his rings when you moved to another one of his fingers to toy with his ring when you realized it just fucking spun.
That woke you right up.
“What is that?” Your eyes shot open, immediately looking down at his fingers in your hand, finally noticing that he had a new ring.
You thought you had somehow broken one of his rings or something, but upon spotting the new one, you gently gave it another little push and it spun again, your eyes shooting over to jj now.
He couldn’t hold in his laughter at your reaction, mentally patting himself on the back for his decision to let it be a surprise for you, your reaction was both hilarious yet also warmed his heart at the same time. He always felt like both emotional and material wise, he didn’t have much to offer. Though as your relationship progressed, he began to rewire some of his toxic thoughts about himself, learning more about the good things about himself that his brain never allowed him to acknowledge.
“You like it?” He laughed, already knowing the answer.
“It’s uh, it’s a fidget ring. Basically just a regular ring but it’s actually designed to be played with and stuff.” He explained, watching you with a satisfied grin as you continued to play with it.
“Did you get this for me?” You asked him, and you swore your heart was about to explode. This was genuinely one of the most thoughtful things anyone has ever done for you.
“Course I did,” he kissed the top of your head, “you’re always playin’ with my rings, thought I’d get one that’s more fun, y’know?” He chuckled softly as you continued to mess with it.
“Oh my godddd..” you giggled, tilting your head to kiss his lips repeatedly, only pulling away because you both kept laughing.
“I’m glad you like it, baby.” He hummed, pulling you even closer to him.
“I love it.” You smiled contently against his chest.
“So, you must really love when I play with your hands, huh?”
#jj maybank#jj maybank x reader#outer banks#jj maybank one shot#jj maybank fanfiction#jj maybank prompt#jj maybank fic#jj maybank imagine#jj’s rings core???
794 notes
·
View notes
Note
Eating up your Harumasa content about him and cockwarming, May I request more of that pls🙏🏻Maybe some (consensual) somno as well👉🏻👈🏻
🍓I kept this in the drafts until baby girl came out! Happy Haru release day my loves <3 I hope you all enjoy him as much as I do!!! I fleshed out the original post into a full piece, so I hope you don't mind too much my love. Didn't do the somno unfortunately, just couldn't fit it in naturally.
Minors DNI!!
TW: NSFW; Grammar errors; Written pre-story quest so inaccuracies are bound to appear <3
Info: Harumasa x Reader; Fem bodied reader; They/them pronouns/ you/yours
Harumasa had a long day. You can hear it from the kitchen, the way his feet drag against the floor and the grunts he lets out as he fights off his shoes. You hear him cuss them out after they thump against the hardwood of your shared entrance. Then his feet drag their way all the way to you, finally slumping over your shoulder with the most relieved sigh.
The way he acts, it seems like he just came back from an unending war. That wasn't the case, of course, it was more likely that Yanagi asked him to do his portion of paperwork and he just didn't want to do it. (Then he would proceed to do not only his but also finish Yanagi's and Miyabi's if he saw fit.) His arms wrap around your waist, and he hums happily. It's cute enough that you set down the knife you were using to run your fingers through his pretty silky black hair, turning and pressing a kiss to his forehead.
"Hello, my love," you coo, "How was work."
It takes him a moment to respond as if he was soaking in the words fully before yellow eyes peered up at you, "Mmm, long... and hard."
You're too late to catch the innuendo, and his hands have already slid up from your stomach to give your chest a squeeze. Simultaneously, he pulls you back into him, and you feel that he is in fact long and hard. It draws a gasp from your lips, which satisfies him into sighing against your skin.
"Harumasa," you deadpan, pulling at his hands which won't budge for anything, as always.
He doesn't humor you with a response, pressing heated kisses up and down your neck. It's a tactic he loves to use, buttering you up just so he can get what he wants. It was infuriatingly effective. Still, you were in the middle of making dinner for him. Certainly, he could let you finish doing that.
You manage to push his head away from your neck, which has him whining like a child, but you don't relent and he finally pulls back enough so you can look at him. "We need to eat, Haru."
"I was getting to it," he quips back, smirking that annoyingly cute smirk.
"We need to eat food," You insist, gesturing to the half-made meal on the countertop.
He pouts at it like it was personally offending him just by existing. Then you see him go over the ingredients, and his face lights up just a little. You were making his favorite, figuring it would be a nice treat after a long week at work. Spoiling him was one of your favorite pastimes, after all.
Conflict arises in his pretty yellow eyes, and you watch him debate whether he'd prefer eating you out or eating your homemade cooking more. He comes to his decision by pulling away from you, a deceptively innocent smile on his face.
"Alright, I'll let you finish up," he hums, leaning against the countertop next to you.
You raise an unimpressed eyebrow at him, "But...?"
"Mmm," he taps his chin, feigning consideration and you already know what he's going to ask, "You have to cockwarm me while we watch a movie!"
Of course. It was his favorite thing in the world, especially after a long workday and a good meal. Most weeks ended like this, but it didn't bother you too much. It wasn't a bad deal for you, as annoying as he was about it.
You don't give him a direct answer, simply sighing and turning back to working on the food, "What movie did you have in mind...?"
✦ ⎯⎯ㅤִㅤ୭ ୨♡୧ ৎㅤִ ⎯⎯ ✦
Dinner isn't as relaxed as you wanted, not with Harumasa practically squirming in excitement across from you. You do your best to pretend it's not happening, eating the food you prepared and mentally preparing yourself for the night you have ahead of you. He practically bounds to the living room when you finish, and you know once you finish cleaning up he won't have the patience to wait any longer.
It was childish, but you couldn't help but find it cute. He rarely allowed himself to be this carefree, so indulging him was the least you could do. So you set the last of the dishes in the sink and make your way to the living room, sighing at the sight of him already palming his hard-on through his work pants.
When he notices you there he gives you a lopsided grin, patting his thigh with his free hand. He works his belt and pants open, and it gives you the idea that maybe you should mess around with him too. It was supposed to be fun for both of you after all, right?
He pouts at you when you don't immediately swing your legs over his lap like an obedient dog, jerking his neglected member in his hands a few times for emphasis. You snort at the sight, patting his thigh reassuringly before turning around to face the TV. You hear him let out an annoyed grunt that catches in his throat when you slowly slide your pants over your hips, around the fat of your ass, and finally down the meat of your thighs until it hits the floor.
He grabs at one of the cheeks, humming appreciatively to himself as the digits sink into the fat, "Maybe we should cut the movie altogether..."
You tut at him, swatting his hands away to give him the same show with your underwear. He inhales deeply at the sight of your glistening pussy, exactly the reaction you wanted. With a playful smirk, you turn and slide your legs on either side of him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.
"You're being a brat~" He sings in your ear, lining himself up with your entrance.
You pout innocently, "You didn't like the show?"
He doesn't humor you with an answer, instead guiding your hips down until you are fully seated on his dick. It stung a little not being properly prepped, but you had all the time in the world to adjust. Harumasa loved taking his time with things like these, after all.
He leans over to grab the remote to the DVD player and starts the movie. It's some stupid family film from over a decade ago about mutant rodents saving the world or something like that. You were never too interested in stuff like that, but Harumasa always brought those kinds of films home for cockwarming. Why, you had no clue, but they were delightful distractions.
The beginning is always the easiest for you. It's all nice and pleasant as you adjust to the stretch. You're able to rest your head on his chest and peer over your shoulder at the movie. He's surprisingly cold, which soothes the raging heat that builds in your core. His hands rest against your sides patiently, lying in wait for whenever he decides he's grown bored of the movie.
Perhaps that's why it's so easy because the start is mostly skinship. Harumasa may be a tease, but he does love having you close like this. It's almost innocent if only his cock wasn't buried inside you as deep as it would go.
It starts getting hard when his hands start moving around, which is where you're at right now. They slide from their place on your waist down to your ass, rubbing and squeezing the skin like a stress ball. Then they'll find their way to your thighs, dancing along the meat of them and running his thumbs over the tops before falling back to your ass and repeating the process.
You shiver, stiffening up in his lap as he repeats the motion for the millionth time. An unexpected sharp pain erupts from your ass, and it takes your brain a second to process that he has smacked you. You pull back to glare at him, and he returns the look with an innocent smile, pressing a kiss to your cheek.
"I can't pay attention to the movie with you squirming like that," he scolds lightly, pressing you back into his shoulder.
You fight the urge to grumble back a 'neither can I', and instead try not to focus on the ever-increasing heat in your groin. It's much easier said than done, as each little twitch from either of you gives you a painful reminder that he's balls deep inside you and you can't do anything about it. He laughs at something in the movie and it travels from his chest right through his dick and into your weeping cunt.
You give up on paying attention to the movie at that point, deciding trembling into his shoulder was a better alternative than pretending you were fine. You nose the column of his throat with shaky breaths, burrowing yourself into his shoulder with a pathetic sigh.
He coos at you, running his fingers through your hair in what's meant to be comfort. You know he's just doing it to annoy you, though. Your spine tingles as his fingers tug a little at the hair, your pussy clenching around him in favor. He groans, pulling a little harder to get you to look at him.
Again, you see something like contemplation behind his eyes, then he smiles at you. His hand comes down from your hair to press your neck forward, and he locks lips with you. You sigh happily into the kiss, not realizing how desperately you'd wanted the attention until now. It seems he knows that, with the way he smirks into the kiss before gliding his tongue across your lip.
You happily give him the access he craves, humming as his tongue slips in and pressing against yours. He tastes bitter, like the medicine he takes every day, but the taste is welcome from your neglected body. You graze your fingers against his collarbone and he finally reacts, pressing his hips up into yours before correcting himself.
As if knowing you'd try it, his hands firmly pressed you to him, not allowing you to move. You whine into his mouth, and he pulls away to smile at you, head leaning against the back of the couch. His face is red, but he looks so satisfied which almost makes the torture worth it.
Deciding you can't handle how pretty he is, you lean down to litter warm kisses against his neck. He sighs, lulling his head to the side to give you better access. You suck at the pretty skin, nibbling on whatever your lips can find. You feel the effect it has on him, dick twitching inside you with each new mark you leave. He continues to run his fingers through your hair, humming contentedly as you service him.
It's when you get to his collarbones that he pauses you, pulling your face up to his. He presses a sweet little kiss to your nose, causing you to giggle. He tilts his head to the side, running a finger along your cheek, "How was your day, baby?"
You respond softly to his musing, answering all his questions about your day. Then, in the middle of telling him about what your boss made you do that day, you feel it. His hands very slowly ease your hips into a short, circular movement. You choke on the words, shuddering at the sensation. It felt... so good, you forgot how to think for a moment as your neglected pussy throbs at the attention.
Harumasa tilts his head at you, though he's smirking, "What was that?"
You stutter out the rest of your response, hardly coherent, but it satisfies him nonetheless. He continues to work you against him at the same slow and easy pace, a master of making things long and drawn out.
Those fingers that had been steadily controlling the pace, slide under your shirt to rake against your ribs. Bunching the fabric up along with your bra and tugging it off your body. Your skin pebbles in the cold air of your apartment, and his hands are quick to glide over it to heat it up. He lets out a low whistle at the sight of your tits, hands immediately cupping them like they belonged there.
Your hips stutter at the new sensation, earning you a look from him that makes you return to the previously set rhythm. Without breaking eye contact, he leans forward to kiss over your chest. Even at the awkward angle, he manages to rub every sensitive spot deep inside you, all while sucking pretty red marks into your hot flesh.
He keeps that up for a long while, ensuring that neither of you can cum until he wants you to. It's sweet sweet torture. The pleasure curls up in your gut, unable to release but somehow forever building up.
All at once his head lulls back and his oh-so-steady rhythm suddenly becomes unreliable. His hips stutter against his beat, but he keeps up that slow pace as best as he can. His hand comes down to roll your clit under his thumb, and you finally feel yourself building to your orgasm. He's close too.
"Baby," he whines, gripping your hip tightly, "lemme stuff you, please? I'll getcha plan b in the morning, jus' lemme this once."
He always says that. Not that you're coherent enough to remind him of that fact. All you can think of is how badly you wanna cum, and how you'll say yes to anything to reach that high. So you awkwardly bob your head in a 'yes' motion.
His eyes roll back and he groans, picking up his pace finally. Your hips rut into his with a fervor you didn't know you were capable of. You slump forward, moaning into his shoulder unabashedly. The coil in your stomach twists and twists until it finally snaps.
At the same time, you feel his warm hot cum flood your insides. His cock twitches with each release, and your walls tighten around it almost encouraging the action. His chest rises and falls in succession with yours, fingers curling in your hair soothing both of you.
Your eyes slowly drift closed at the gentle sensation, sighing happily into his shoulder. He presses kisses to your temple, but you know he's just as spent as you are. Neither of you would be leaving the couch, not that it was a problem when he tugged one of your throw blankets across your back, pulling you down into a much more comfortable sideways position.
You drift off with his dick still inside you, the warm sensation of his cum inside you calling you to rest. You always sleep well on nights like these, wrapped up in one another.
#bunni's treats 🧁#zzz x reader#zenless zone zero#zzz#zzz harumasa#asaba harumasa#harumasa x reader#asaba harumasa x reader#asaba x reader#x reader
341 notes
·
View notes
Text
Blood & Cheese Reborn - ,, yandere Aegon w/ an assassin reader
cw(s): yandere themes, child murder, mentions of sa, mention of miscarriage, descriptive gore, sadistic aegon & reader, degredation, suggestive themes (mild nsfw)
𓍢ִ໋🀦 An assassin, the assassin as some would call you. No one was truly aware of your backstory. Some said you were a disgraced general turned mercenary. Others whispered that you used to be an executioner for the kingdom and went mad, turning you into a lunatic who maims and dismembers for money. There was debate on whether you were a man or a woman—perhaps a third gender. Were you tall or short, common or noble, handsome or pretty? You were a tale that was told to children at night to scare them into behaving.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 That is exactly why Daemon Targaryen hired you. He needed you to kill Aemond Targaryen, the one-eyed prince and kinslayer. It was simply a son for a son. You were paid handsomely for this killing—over six thousand gold padded your pockets.
You knew a thing or two about these sorts of tiffs between nobles. You had to carve some nobles' wannabe rapists eyes out the other night. You weren't being paid for it; you simply felt the need to. A rumor turned into you avenging a young, sweet noblewoman.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 The night of your perfected plans was foiled by a rival of yours. 'King' Aegon was warned about Daemon hiring you, and dozens of guards were posted at each possible entrance and exit. There was only one way to get in, and that happened to be the room in which Helaena and her children occupied. You didn't regret what you did; you relished it. You giggled as the so-called 'queen' cried out for you not to slay her son.
You didn't just kill him; you cut off all his fingers and toes and neatly lined them up next to his favorite stuffed dragon toy. You cut off Helaena's ring finger and did the same to her daughter. You kept them and later gifted them to Daemon and Rhaenyra. It was safe to say that you soon became Team Black's most sought-after asset.
You never agreed to work with them, never pledged your loyalty; you simply were willing to work for whoever paid you the most.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 To say Aegon was angry was an understatement. Furious? Livid? Enraged? Irate? No, there was no culmination of words that could express how much Aegon wished to have you tortured, stripped naked, and displayed on a spike at the entrance of the castle for all to see. His fantasies ranged from sadistic to depraved. They were limitless. They took up all the space in his mind that was supposed to be delegated towards comforting his grieving wife and winning the war against the Blacks.
The only thought was to have you pay. It would be you first and then the rest. It had to be you. You committed the sin, so you must pay tenfold.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 He lay awake at night with his anguish and enmity the only ones keeping him company. He refused to look at his wife's face, so he moved himself to a spare bed chamber. He spent his nights downing bottle after bottle of wine. His eyes were teary and red, and the violet within them seemingly paled to a grey. His eyebags rivaled those of any grandfather, and his thirst for revenge was much higher than that of Maegor the Cruel.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 You visited every other night. You'd taunt him gleefully and always escape before any guards arrived. You always had a cloak engulfing your figure and a hood casting shadows over your features. You always sat on the edge of the window with both legs firmly planted on the ledge. Whenever he tried to reach out to touch you, you seemed to vanish. You never even entered the chambers. He could no longer distinguish whether you were a reality or just a visage of all his guilt and wrongdoings coming to seek retribution.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 As the moons passed, the pressure on Aegon and Helaena to copulate increased. The man who was known to fuck multiple whores a night couldn't stand to touch his wife. It wasn't just the fear of losing another kin of his; it was also a certain repulsion. Her body no longer seemed like a viable option. Her curves and supple skin seemed so unappetizing. There was no urge to lick and bite to claim; he simply wanted her to stay as she was.
Helaena acted as if she were distressed at her husband's lack of motivation, but she was internally relieved. She doesn't know if she'll ever be able to carry a child again. She is already so much more protective over Jaehaera after Jaehaerys's brutal assassination.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 His cock ached, and the fog within his mind only thickened after each drop of alcohol he consumed. He had piles of parchment ranging from displeased smallfolk to plans of war. You hadn't visited him that night, and his entire thought process was only about you. He aimlessly palmed himself through his trousers and slipped into a dreamless sleep after.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 His revenge was only able to fuel him for so long, and now his body is spent. He hadn't seen you in his window for almost a full moon, and he had begun to think that you had moved on. His heart broke more at the thought. He would never be able to avenge the death of his beloved son. He would never be able to carry the crown on his head without it weighing his head down to the ground. The war would be won by The Blacks, and Rhaenyra would sit on the throne. His family would die, and it would all be because he was too weak.
Like a dragon, he needed warmth, and it seemed as if he had been deprived of it for far too long.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 After two moons, you finally returned with that dreadfully melodic voice of yours. One leg was thrown over the side into his bedroom, and the other perched upon the ledge. His lifeless eyes barely opened until you ignited the flame within his belly once again.
"Did the little King miss me?"
No, he did not. He was simply worried that he had missed the chance for revenge.
"I heard you can't get your dick up for your wife. You're even more pathetic than I thought you were. You'll never have another son to replace the one I killed at this rate. Such a shame. I was looking forward to murdering that one to!"
He shot out of bed and tried to grab a hold of your cloak. He merely stumbled and fell flat on his face.
"Stupid boy, you never learn."
Like the winds you moved. One moment within his reach, and the next, halfway down the castle wall, to only the gods know where.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 He's slightly ashamed to say that's the first time he's been able to relieve himself since his son's death. He imagined how you appeared and how you would look standing over him. That smug smirk on your features, the one so evident in your voice. Cock or breasts—both, neither, either—he didn't care. He was simply too willing to be looked down upon—just so he could titter and then slaughter you.
Filled with such conflicting emotions, two beasts fought over what course of action was needed. He would have to keep you for questioning, surely. If he killed you outright, then he wouldn't have a chance to know about his opposition.
He couldn't stop biting down on his lips to suppress his noises. He couldn't help the few tears that escaped the eyes that were temporarily a vibrant violet. He whined in a manner undignified and unbecoming of a king. Your title simply falls past his swollen lips with heavy breaths.
"Stupid fucking assassin."
"Just an insignificant assassin."
"A-Assassin."
"Mommy."
𓍢ִ໋🀦 He felt invigorated for the first time since your appearance. His thoughts became more violent, twice as lewd. No one knew what happened with him that night. No one could know. His mother interrogated him, and he simply said that he made a change. Alicent did not buy that excuse for one moment but didn't press further. As long as he got his act together and ruled like a king, she was satisfied.
She did send Ser Criston to investigate, and he came back with a gash in his chest and a wound right above his navel, courtesy of you.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 She couldn't help but rush him to the maester. She doted on him after behind closed doors. He deserved it after everything he had been through. Alicent couldn't help but feel as if it were some slight towards her. As if this assassin knew her secret, her love.
"Ser Criston, it was that damned assassin that harmed you, wasn't it?"
"Yes, my queen."
She wished to blame Aegon. The assassin never seemed to take notice of anyone else in the family after the horrific tragedy of Jaehaerys's untimely death. You only seemed to harass her eldest son. She suspected it to be Aemond, who was your original target. Why not kill him now?
She should chastise her son for not being more vigilant. He was the second most grief striken; he pledged revenge over and over, yet the one who committed the action always escaped him without so much as a scratch. She only lectured Aegon further and spoke about how he should rekindle his relationship with Helaena.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 Aegon could barely find it in himself to bed his wife. He was nearly being forced to do so by his court and mother, but he could only look at Helaena and see your hooded figure. He had never felt more fulfilled than imagining your body was the one beneath him instead of hers.
Helaena was absent as always, her mind drifting off into thoughts of the future. She did not mind Aegon's method, but she wasn't entirely enthusiastic about being put through it.
Something felt off to her—a foreboding sensation that crept from her stomach into her soul. It made her spine tingle. Her chest would tighten to the point where she was barely able to take a breath.
It was because of a dream she recently had—a reoccurring one. Someone else was cradling the dragon egg she promised for her next child, as it seemed that she would have to perform her duty and bear another. She could tell by their hands that it was not her holding the egg. The hands had many more callouses and a multitude of scars.
She only verbalized it to a single person.
They were a kind traveler simply passing through. She knows she shouldn't have burdened a stranger; they could have been a spy, but it just felt right to do so.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 It was the first time he had slept in the same bed as his wife since the incident. So, like a predator, you struck when he was vulnerable and spent once again. He can't lie; his heart palpitated and his violet pupils dilated due to more than just the darkness. He could feel his body flushing once again after being graced with the outline of your figure standing at the edge of his room. He dared not to speak first. For a moment, he wanted to drag you into this bed instead of tying you down and beating the answers out of you.
You could see the need in his violet irises. The draconic king was ravenous and wanted to devour you. It was so endearing. You were only here for answers, as always. Daemon eagerly shoved gold into your hands so he could receive the information you collected. It was a win-win. You got to play with the king and then go undercover for answers. You even caught a kingsguard the other day, the queens plaything. Now you get to see a mama's boy with a confused libido, all because of little old you.
"Is your precious wifey full of another of your kin yet? Did you enjoy it? Did you think of me? Oh, mommy~. You're just a love-starved boy, aren't you?"
How did you know that one word escaped his lips over seven nights ago? God's damn it. He meant nothing by it. It wasn't even directed toward the assassin. It wasn't directed toward anyone! He was so drunk out of his mind that he could have said something asinine, and you would have taken it as purely sexual.
He was stunned for a moment and then refused to speak. He wouldn't give you the pleasure.
"Baby boy is mad at his mommy, or would you prefer to call me daddy? You can call me that since you don't have one of those either."
"Assassin—"
You were gone, hurriedly this time. He just barely got a glimpse of your features being shone in the moonlight. He now had another problem to take care of, all thanks to you—stupid... person.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 It had been over eleven moons since your first appearance. Many people had fallen in war and illness; there were talks of King's Landing being taken over. Helaena was with child and then miscarried due to the stress she was under. His wife is now in a deep depression, and Aegon himself is struggling to keep the crumbling greens together.
He could no longer say that he despised you, for he found solace in your mocking words. He needed to keep you in his presence. He needed to cage you. He needed to show you who you belonged to.
What if you left him? What if you decided that he had become too much of a bore? What if you chose to—what is he thinking?
This is all part of your plan.
You won't win.
You'll end up bent over the war room table, begging to be forgiven by him.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 That's what he thinks. It's what words he may dare to spill from his lips. He had to move to a separate chamber if he was to get back at you. It was the only thing that kept him sane. The thought of finally kneading your flesh and claiming it as his. To think of whispering tantalizing words into your ear, for you to whine and come undone as he has because of you.
His goblet is almost empty as the hour of ghosts arrives. You always appear at this time, until you don't. You turn up during the hour of the wolf, weakened. You have a hand clutching your side, and your breathing is ragged. There's a trail of blood marking the edge of the window. Your gloved hand was a deep crimson, leaving the prints of your agony behind on whatever you clung to.
He's half-clothed. He feels the urge to shed the rest of the layers as soon as he lays his eyes on you. His eyes were semi-lidded, and now they are greedily taking in such a precious sight. A gift from the gods.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 You collapsed on the stone floor before him. Your features are easily accessible for his consumption. His nimble fingers slipped the hood of the cloak off your face, and he felt as if he had won the war right then and there.
"The blacks most valuable asset laying right beneath me. Do you regret your words now, ñuha sentys₍₁₎?"
"Never."
Even your voice was hoarse, so soft and unconfident, unlike the tone you used to spit vitriolic words at him for so many moons.
His hands were vigorously shaking. His mind began outpacing his ability to comprehend.
He had you within his grasp. What was he now going to do?
Lua ao, zȳhon byka ruarilaksa.₍₂₎
𓍢ִ໋🀦 He would later learn that there were rumors of you getting ambushed. You had come back to kill off his younger brother, and you were jumped by a group of mercenaries. He was unable to scavenge any further details of the fight, except for the fact that you became injured and still tried to follow through with your plan. Aemond stated that he saw your figure briefly. Aemond was speaking with another kingsguard at that time. Then you must have retreated to his room for some unknown reason.
The story is strange, but considering the scarcity of true tales about you and your elusiveness, it isn't unbelievable.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 You would later be forced into some hastily thrown-together room in a secluded part of the dungeons. You awoke to the long gash in your side cleaned and bandaged, your limbs shackled, and your fine fabrics used to conceal yourself replaced with some useless, dainty nightgown.
The dungeon room was mostly bare. There wasn't a guard to be seen, but you could hear the faint voices of at least two down the corridor. It had a cot with a blanket and a feather-filled pillow. An old rug was placed on the grimey stones. It left you with a bit of padding. The entire cell stinks of rotten flesh and broken spirits.
You loved it.
It was the perfect place to escape from.
You just needed to heal and find some way to slip out of these chains. You could then steal a guard's uniform and get out of this horrid sleepwear.
It's so thin you can nearly your skin through the translucent cloth.
Damn king.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 You would not see him until the morrow. You broke your fast with a bowl of porridge and two slices of bread. You were given a glass of dry Arbor red wine. All the while, Aegon was staring at you with an expression you couldn't quite decipher. You weren't shy about scarfing down the food. You were irritated that he now knows of your features and perhaps others, but it wasn't the end of your career.
You have been known by many names in your years of assassinry. You have had to erase your past on numerous occasions.
It wouldn't be the first time you had to kill a king. It certainly won't be the last.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 This became a monotonous routine. Aegon would bring you your meals and you would eat them in silence. He never said a word to you. He simply stared at you, seemingly appraising you. You were still unable to tell his thoughts. You knew that he was wrapped around your finger. That much was made clear to you.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 Aegon kept every guard's mouth shut and didn't allow any of his family members to know you were down in the dungeons. They may try to kill you! Only he is allowed to decide your fate. After all, he is the true ruler of the Iron Throne.
He does suspect that Daemon and Rhaenyra will eventually notice your absence. He doesn't know the inner workings of your relationship with the Blacks, but you must be close enough to where they would become concerned.
He'd lie awake at night and think about it once again. There were so many things he could do to you that he became paralyzed by the opportunity before him.
He simply kissed his wife's head and made his way down to the dungeons once again.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 Aegon decided to do what you had been depriving him of for so long. He gives into that need for you, and you so willingly reciprocate. He gets lost in it. He almost loses his mind entirely. He can't decide whether he enjoys degrading you or being degraded by you more.
It becomes a daily thing for him. An addiction that he doesn't wish to acknowledge or stop.
He never takes off your chains or gives you moon tea. If you miraculously bore his child, then perhaps he would let you.
Oh, it becomes a regularly occurring fantasy for him.
You bearing a male heir for him. The male heir that would replace the son you took. He would never allow you to have your child. He would raise it as if it was Helaena's. The look of anguish and the hurt in your voice to be denied the thing you created. It fills him with a crazed glee.
Perhaps you can't have kids at all, but it doesn't stop his dream of giving himself pleasure and making you suffer to the cruelest extent.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 He dresses you up in the skimpiest and frilliest things he can find. It's partially for his viewing pleasure and partially so you won't have anything to escape in. It's safe to say that it never stays on you for very long.
Anything to remind you that you're beneath him.
Always.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 He uses you as a release for all his pent up emotions. He shares random things about himself and his day. He asks you questions about yourself and hangs onto every word you say. He no longer sees your jabs at him as hate filled; no, they've been playful and loving all along. You just wanted his attention. That's why you've done all these unforgivable things.
You're insecure.
He understands that. He needs to pay more attention to you.
So he carves his name into you with his precious dagger. He marks you in any way that pleases him; he loves to keep them fresh. He just needs to make sure that you know who you belong to.
He doesn't want to see you getting into a tizzy and attacking him again, even if it excites him.
𓍢ִ໋🀦 Since capturing you, the progress of the opposition has slowed. He has been winning numerous battles. The Greens have gained significant ground.
Who are you, truly?
How big of a part have you really played in this civil war?
He has to know. So he goes back down to the dungeon with an even more urgent need for information.
You're gone.
"Mittys, mittys, mittys! Eminna zirȳ arlī. Nyke'll emagon se guard's bartos bona ivestragī zirȳ henujagon!"₍₃₎
You only left a hastily scribbled note with a few barely legible words on it.
"𝘜𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨."
— 𝘈ō𝘩𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘺𝘴₍₄₎
ᝰ translation(s) ᝰ.ᐟ
1. ñuha sentys = my killer
2. Lua ao, zȳhon byka ruarilaksa. = Keep you, his little secret.
3. Mittys, mittys, mittys! Eminna zirȳ arlī. Nyke'll emagon se guard's bartos bona ivestragī zirȳ henujagon! = Idiot, idiot, idiot! I will have them back. I'll have the guard's head that let them leave/escape.
4. Aōha sentys = Your killer
𖹭 tag: ( @eexphoria ) 𖹭
#headcanons#hotd#yandere hotd#hotd x reader#house of the dragon#yandere hotd x reader#yandere house of the dragon#yandere house of the dragon x reader#hotd fanfic#aegon ii#aegon the second#aegon ii targaryen#aegon x reader#aegon targaryen x reader#hotd aegon#aegon targaryen#aegon ii targaryen x reader#king aegon#yandere aegon#yandere aegon ii targaryen#yandere aegon targaryen#yandere aegon x reader#yandere aegon targaryen x reader#yandere aegon ii targaryen x reader
464 notes
·
View notes
Text
One - The Price of Victory | Series Masterlist
Summary: As a deposed Aemond licks his wounds from a long fought war, Lady Rosaleen embarks from Raventree Hall to meet her husband-to-be | Word Count: 7.1k~ | Warnings: mention of war, canon-divergent, post-Dance Aemond, trauma, arranged marriage
The throne sat empty.
The great Iron Throne of Aegon the Conqueror loomed above, its twisted, jagged shadows flickering in the candlelight. Aemond stood before it, his hands clasped tightly behind his back, his single violet eye fixed on the seat his brother had died fighting to secure.
He had once seen death, stared it right in the face that bore Daemon Targaryen's likeness, all for the worthiness of ruling from that very seat.
And yet he still did not possess the authority to sit it. Despite the fight through the flames, the blood, the agony. The sacrifices.
The war had been won, the Blacks were defeated, scattered or dead. And yet the realm was far from whole. He had thought the Green victory would bring order, that their triumph would be enough to heal the scars left by his brother’s rule and Rhaenyra’s rebellion. But Aegon’s sudden death had shattered the fragile stability they had only just begun to claim. Without heirs to secure what his brother had left behind.
He had returned to King’s Landing bloodied and battered, prepared to embrace whatever welcome awaited him. But his mother, his dear, grief-stricken mother, had not greeted him with open arms and cries of joy. She had wept and railed against him, her voice breaking as her fists struck his chest, powerless but furious. The Dance, with all its death and fire, had torn her heart to pieces, and though she had welcomed him home, the weight of her grief had been clear.
“Do you see what we are left with?” she had asked him, her voice rough and hoarse from the nights of mourning. Aemond remembered the rawness of her face, the pale grief etched into every line. “A land left in ruin. A son who cannot sit the throne. And my girl…my only girl…”
He felt the blood that remained in his weakened body drain from his face. He had heard vague murmurings of Helaena's sorrow after the death of Jaehaerys, but no one had prepared him for the truth that now burned in his mother’s haunted eyes.
At least Rhaenyra had taken mercy on little Jaehaera. She remained, not unlike Rhaenyra’s own sons, locked away, but now protectively in Alicent’s wing of the Keep under the close eyes of her grandmother. Aemond himself felt a responsibility toward his niece, she was a small, fragile thing, with Helaena’s soft eyes and gentle manner, bearing the scars of tragedy but untouched by the fire and vengeance that had consumed her kin.
She was but a child. But her presence was a silent, solemn reminder of the sister he felt he had failed.
The damage from the Dance was more severe than any one man could hope to repair. Rhaenyra had left the realm in disarray, her supporters either dead or reduced to whispers of rebellion. Houses that had once stood tall were now in ruin, their lands burned and loyalty frayed. Aegon’s death had formed a dark power vacuum, and already, ambitious Lords, eyes glimmering with the sweet promise of power, were already pressing their influence and claims.
Of course, there was still the question of Rhaenyra’s two trueborn surviving sons. Aegon the Younger and little Viserys. Glorified prisoners, yes, but their very existence cast a long shadow over Aemond’s claim. Both boys, with the ability to inspire rebellion in those who still held a candle to Rhaenyra’s long lost claim. The Council ceaselessly debated what to do with the boys in the tower, under guard, whether they might be kept as hostages, or if the crown would be safer without them drawing breath another day longer than necessary.
He found himself thinking of Alys, who said she had been with child and indeed appeared as such the last time he had seen her.
Alys had known him too well, perhaps better than he’d ever allowed anyone else. She’d known what fuelled him, what burned within him even when he’d barely grasped it himself. He had abandoned her for what he thought could have been his last moments above Gods Eye Lake. She had looked at him that final time with something unspoken in her gaze, with weight of words she hadn’t voiced. She had sworn she was carrying his child, and he’d believed her, if only because Alys Rivers had always known how to see truths that others could not.
When word had first spread of his fall, when the ravens bore news of his assumed death, she had slipped away, disappearing from Harrenhal without a trace. Even if she had birthed his child, the council would not care for another bastard to claim any place in his line, nor would his mother or his brother have allowed it. Aemond knew this, he had known it even when he had found comfort in Alys’ arms, seeking something to fill the gnawing emptiness.
He could only assume she was either gone, or dead. And the child? If there ever was one. Were they dead too?
He clenched his jaw, willing the thought from his mind. Alys belonged to the past, like the ghosts of every flame he’d left smoldering in his path.
Aemond found himself alone, pondering to himself, without even the energy to write his warring thoughts on paper. What was there to write about anymore? The war was over. This was a time to rebuild. To heal. And yet he felt the cold, claw of guilt at his throat, no closer to the throne than he had been before.
The Small Council chambers felt barren, and Aemond’s position was heavily felt, having not been granted his seat at the head of the table this time around. He rolled his shoulder, the scars where Daemon had plunged Dark Sister through flesh and muscle stretching uncomfortably. The Maesters had said he’d be left with less mobility, but that it should not affect his duties.
He was not sure whether to be pleased about that.
Ser Tyland Lannister, Lord Larys Strong, Ser Jasper Wylde and Maester Gerardys sat in silence, their expressions carefully measured. At the far end of the table sat his mother, her hands folded neatly in her lap, her gaze steady. It was a wonder to Aemond the men that sat around this table were not dead following Rhaenyra’s short but tumultuous reign. He wondered if the shadows of war had made them distrustful of one another. In this there was no doubt. If Aemond himself were to have an opinion on anyone, it was Maester Gerardys, now more a prisoner than an ally, unable to flee King's Landing after the Pretender and Aegon’s death.
It seemed this opinion was shared, for several pairs of eyes carefully scanned the room. And he was not left without a lingering glance himself, the Kinslayer.
“We need the Riverlands pacified,” Ser Tyland Lannister’s voice broke through the silence, his eyes scanning the room. “The lords there are restless. House Tully may have bent the knee, but it was under duress. Loyalty is fragile.”
“The Tullys are irrelevant,” Aemond growled, his eye narrowing as he leaned forward. “They supported Rhaenyra. They will suffer for it, as will every house that stood against us.”
“And yet we need them,” Tyland insisted, “the Riverlands cannot be held by fear alone. We must bring them back into the fold, to rebuild what has fallen.”
Aemond caught the judgmental glimpse in Alicent’s expression. The corners of her lips were turned downwards. It was no wonder, she had lost her two eldest children, and by extension perhaps blamed Aemond partly for it. In fact, there was no doubt in his mind that she did, though she dare not voice it.
They were already fractured enough as it was.
“I have reduced the Riverlands to ash, burned their keeps and their armies, and yet you stand here telling me I need to beg for their loyalty?”
A soft voice cut through the tension. “That is not what they mean, Aemond.”
Alicent’s voice was gentle, but firm, and the council fell silent as she spoke.
“They do not question your strength,” she continued, her green eyes meeting his. “They question the realm’s ability to follow. A marriage, an alliance with the right house, will show the lords that the crown offers stability, not just fire and blood.”
Aemond stared at his mother for a moment, frustration simmering beneath the surface. Alicent, ever the pragmatist, was right. Without a wife, without an alliance, the crown would slip further from his grasp.
“You would see me tied to a family that fought against us,” Aemond said slowly, his voice quieter now but no less bitter. “You would have me wed a traitor’s kin. Some whore who seeks to slit my throat in my sleep.”
“I would see you rule, Aemond. Truly rule, not as a weapon to be feared, but as a king to be respected. And to do that, we need allies.”
“And who, exactly, do you propose I marry?” Aemond asked, his voice cold.
Tyland cleared his throat. “The Riverlands are still unstable. House Tully has suffered greatly, but they remain the strongest house in the region. Grover Tully’s granddaughter is of age, though her appearance leaves much to be desired. A marriage such as that would secure their loyalty.”
“The Tullys.” Aemond spat.
Tyland shifted uncomfortably in his seat, knowing the prince’s temper. “It is not ideal, I admit,” he said carefully, “but their support is crucial if we are to stabilise the Riverlands.”
Aemond’s lip curled in disgust. “No. I will not be tied to the Tullys. I’d sooner burn what’s left of their lands than share my bed with one of them.”
A tense silence filled the room as the council exchanged glances. Alicent watched her son closely, her hands clasped tightly in her lap. She knew Aemond’s pride, his thirst for vengeance. But there was more at stake now than settling old grudges.
After a moment, Lord Larys Strong spoke up, his voice as soft and measured as always. “House Blackwood, though they suffered under war, there remains both a sister and cousin of the late Lord Willem Blackwood. Women of good health and said to be pleasing to the eye. The Blackwoods supported the Pretender at first, yes, but their rivalry with the Brackens runs deep. It would not take much to sway them to our side, especially with the promise of a marriage alliance.”
Tyland hummed, “The Blackwoods... their lands are a stone’s throw from Harrenhal, are they not?”
“Indeed,” Larys replied, a small smile playing at the corner of his lips. “They hold Raventree Hall, a strong seat. Though damaged, they are still a proud family, and their loyalty would go a long way in solidifying our control over the Riverlands.”
Aemond considered this, his anger still simmering beneath the surface, but the suggestion intrigued him more than the idea of wedding a Tully. The Blackwoods were an old family, their lineage stretching back to the First Men. And unlike the Tullys, they had the potential to be turned, to be controlled. He could see a use in them.
“Alysanne, the sister,” Aemond murmured, his lips twisting slightly. “She has a temper. Is that not so?” He glanced at Lord Larys, who inclined his head ever so slightly, confirming it with an almost imperceptible smile.
“A reputation, yes,” Larys replied smoothly. “But they say she is fierce in her loyalties as well.”
“Fierce,” Aemond repeated, with a faint note of disdain. “We need stability, not fire in my bedchambers. If I am to wed, I require someone who knows restraint.”
Tyland tilted his head thoughtfully. “The cousin,” he interjected. “Lady Rosaleen. Younger, unwed, and without Alysanne’s...spirited reputation. It’s said she has a measured disposition, more practical.”
“And this cousin,” Aemond said slowly, his gaze returning to the council, “she is... acceptable?”
Tyland nodded quickly, seizing the opportunity to move the conversation forward. “From all accounts, yes. A match with her would be seen as favorable to the Blackwoods, and the lords of the Riverlands might look more kindly on us if they see a prominent house backing your rule.”
Alicent, who had remained silent thus far, finally spoke, her voice calm and deliberate. “The Blackwoods may not have the strength of the Tullys, but they are more easily brought into the fold. And they have ties to the Vale as well. It would be a stronger alliance than it first appears.”
Aemond listened, his jaw tight as Alicent spoke. How calm she was, how assured, as if this were all some grand plan of her own design. It was as though they believed they were managing him, holding the crown above him like a carrot, promising him power only if he agreed to be led like a child.
He was a Targaryen prince. He had brought the realm to its knees, put cities to flame, fought on dragonback while others schemed in dark rooms. And now, these men, the same who had depended on him to break Rhaenyra’s forces, were telling him he needed a marriage to prove his worth?
“Very well,” he said, his voice firm. “If Rosaleen Blackwood is suitable, then send word. I’ll not spend weeks deliberating over this.”
Tyland and the other councilors nodded, clearly eager to push forward without provoking his anger further. But Alicent held his gaze, her eyes full of a quiet resolve that only deepened his resentment.
“Power must be won and held,” she said softly. “A wise ruler knows when to fight, and when to accept what the realm demands.”
Aemond’s lip curled slightly. “I need no lessons on ruling from those who never took up the sword themselves,” he replied, his voice low, his words laced with a veiled challenge.
Alicent’s face remained still, her expression unreadable, but he saw the flicker of disappointment in her eyes. Good, he thought bitterly. Let her see what she had turned him into.
Lord Tyland shifted uncomfortably and cleared his throat, sensing the tension in the air. "If there are no further questions, my prince, we shall proceed with sending word to House Blackwood," he said cautiously, glancing at Alicent as he stood, signalling to the other lords.
One by one, the men nodded their obedience and filed out, though each cast a furtive glance at Aemond as they went, as if wary of stirring his already simmering ire. When the doors finally closed, Alicent alone remained, her gaze fixed on her son, unreadable but purposeful.
The silence stretched between them, heavy and unyielding. Arms folded tightly across his chest, he returned her stare, waiting for her to speak first. And when she did not, his voice came firm. “If you have something to say then do.”
"Aemond," Alicent began softly, her voice calm but with a mother’s authority. "You will listen to me on this matter. I did not orchestrate this alliance to spite you, nor do I take pleasure in it. It is meant to steady your rule, to make the people look upon you as something other than..." she hesitated, then continued, "other than the prince who left them in flames."
Aemond’s jaw clenched at her words, and he felt a surge of resentment well up within him. “It is the council, and you, who seem to think my claim is not enough, that I must be leashed to a wife for the sake of ‘stability.’ Do you think that will fix what’s broken?” His voice dropped to a low hiss. “Or do you fear what I might do if left unattended?”
“You know very well I do.”
A tense silence followed, her words sinking in, and she took a steadying breath, her voice laced with something colder than he had ever heard from her before. “Do you think this is what I wanted for you? You were once my smallest son, sensitive and watchful. You had no dragon, and you bore your lack of one as if it were a wound carved into your very soul. When you lost your eye, I defended you against your father and Rhaenyra both. I demanded justice for you. I would have gone to war for you then.” She paused, her gaze piercing, unrelenting. “But I did not know that you, too, would someday thrive at war, against all the blood that is ours.”
Aemond’s eyes flickered as her words cut through him, and Alicent pressed on, each sentence ringing with controlled pain. “And Lucerys, Aemond. A boy. A boy not much older than you were then. And you watched your brother maim himself in pursuit of a throne he barely understood.”
“It was not me who put him there–”
“The throne. All these horrors in its name, and you still cling to it. You are not that boy who sought justice anymore. I cannot treat you as if you are, because you, too, are changed. Changed beyond anything I could ever have imagined.”
She took a long breath, her expression softening only slightly. “I know you have lived your own horrors, seen and endured things I’ll never understand. But that does not release you from what you have done. This realm is broken, Aemond, and I do not have the luxury of turning a blind eye any longer. If you wish to rule, you will do so not as my boy but as a man who understands the destruction he has wrought and the lives he is responsible for now.
“And you will do so with a wife, of our choosing, at your side.”
"You speak as though I have any choice in the matter," he said, his voice low and controlled, though the bitterness was unmistakable. His single eye burned into hers, searching for any trace of the mother he had once known, the one who had stood by him when no one else would.
How was it that this woman could make him feel comfort and resentment in the same breath?
Alicent held his gaze unwavering, her own resolve as firm as stone. "You always had a choice, Aemond.”
Aemond stood in silence, the weight of her final words pressing down on him like an anchor. There would be no turning back. No reclaiming the innocence of his youth, no undoing the choices that had irrevocably altered the course of his life. But Aemond would not forget her role in this, nor the way she and the council wielded his title like a weapon to keep him in line.
He was a Targaryen, and he would have his due, with or without their approval.
Since that night Aegon had humiliated him, Aemond hadn’t set foot on the Street of Silk. The thought of returning filled him with distaste. He could still feel the shame that had burned through him that night, searing hotter than any physical pleasure he might have found there.
Any lingering need had fizzled away, replaced by something colder, harder. The women in those dimly lit chambers had meant nothing to him then, and they would mean even less now. He had no desire to seek warmth in the arms of strangers when he had seen, firsthand, how shallow and fleeting those comforts could be.
When it would come to his new bride, would he even feel it then?
The Blackwoods, the Riverlands, a marriage alliance, these were the scraps thrown to a prince who had taken up arms and shed blood for the realm.
As dawn crept over the Red Keep, Aemond resolved himself to the path laid before him. He would marry Lady Rosaleen Blackwood, claim the title that was his by right, and bring the Riverlands into submission. But they would not break him.
He was fire and blood, a Targaryen prince, and he would see his will done, even if the realm itself had to bend to him.
The first morning light broke over the twisted, ancient branches of the great weirwood in Raventree Hall’s courtyard. She stood by the open window of her chamber, allowing the cool air to fill her lungs as she watched the courtyard stir to life. Despite her resolve, there was a fluttering anticipation in her chest.
The summons had come suddenly, a raven delivered in the dead of night, sealed with the unmistakable mark of the crown. She, Rosaleen Blackwood, was to wed Prince Aemond Targaryen. A prince known for his ferocity, his scars, and his dragon.
This would change everything.
There was no one in her family who truly expected her to embrace the idea of a Targaryen husband. She was willful, outspoken, a trait her dear late mother said would lead to her ruin one day. But for Rosaleen, she had seen too many Blackwood women fade into quiet, thankless marriages to lesser lords.
Surely, Rosaleen thought, there was more to life than that.
A knock came at her door. “Cousin?” called a familiar voice, light and lilting. “Are you prepared to greet your new future with a crown on your head and steel in your heart?”
Rosaleen smirked and turned from the window. Her cousin, Alysanne Blackwood, stood in the doorway with a mischievous look in her eyes. Alysanne was slender, quick with her wit, and one of the few people she could say she truly trusted. Her cousin’s easy humor balanced Rosaleen’s own seriousness and had kept her sane through many difficult times.
“Steel, perhaps,” Rosaleen replied with a half-smile. “I’ll not be donning a crown just yet, Aly. And I’ll thank you not to go spreading that nonsense, either.”
Alysanne grinned, unfazed. “Come now, surely you see the humor in this. A Targaryen prince, no less! Though from what I hear, he’s as likely to bite your head off as he is to kiss your hand.”
Rosaleen rolled her eyes. “I imagine he’s as dangerous as they say. I just wonder if the prince is worth the legend they’ve made of him.”
“I don’t know that you’ll be in the habit of judging such things as worth or value,” Alysanne teased. “But you’re right to be wary. These Targaryens, fire and blood, they say. Not exactly the family motto one would choose for a quiet, married life.”
“A quiet life was never in my plans, cousin, and you know it. This marriage will be many things, but quiet is not one of them.”
The confidence in her voice gave way to a faint gleam of excitement.
“Of course,” Rosaleen said, her thoughts settling on her decision, “I’m taking you with me, along with several of the girls. They’re packing now.”
Alysanne raised her brows in mock surprise. “Is that so?”
“Why shouldn’t I?” Rosaleen replied, her tone pragmatic. “My ladies will be my eyes, my ears, and my voice in King’s Landing. I’ll not go into that place with only strangers and stiff-backed lords watching me.”
“The prince may not be pleased to find his bride arriving with such strength in numbers.”
Rosaleen shrugged, unconcerned. “If he’s displeased, then it will be the first of many he’ll have to learn to bear.”
Alysanne nodded approvingly, clearly delighted at the thought of the Targaryen prince squirming. “I’ll pack my wittiest retorts.”
Alysanne’s laughter echoed down the corridor as she left, the sound fading as Rosaleen returned to her walls, donned with decorations, lost in thought. She knew there would be whispers, even accusations of ambition. She was no fool, she understood the risks involved. Marrying into a family of dragonlords was no simple task, especially when her family was deeply rooted in the traditions of the Riverlands.
Yet, she could not deny the thrill that had taken root in her heart. A Blackwood married to a Targaryen. It was a match that would change the fortunes of her house, potentially even the future of the kingdom itself. And if Aemond expected her to cower in the shadow of his dragon, he would find himself sorely disappointed.
The night was cool and quiet, as if in mourning. The moon cast pale light across the yard, making the gnarled branches of the dead weirwood glisten like skeletal fingers reaching up to the seven heavens. Perched along the branches, dozens of black ravens watched her with beady eyes, heads cocking as she neared, almost as if they recognised her.
This old tree had been known to her family for generations, its twisted, pale trunk and dark, blood-red leaves a constant reminder of their allegiance to the Old Gods. Who they were. Though the tree was long dead, the ravens still came, roosting among its branches as if drawn to its silent power. They had been her confidants since childhood, and tonight, she felt a pang of sorrow leaving them behind.
"Rosaleen."
The familiar voice came from behind her, soft and steady. Her father’s tone held a subtle mix of warmth and worry, the same note she had heard in his voice ever since the raven had brought the news of her betrothal. Rosaleen turned to face him, meeting his serious gaze, flickering slightly to the cane held firmly in his grip. In the dim moonlight, his face was shadowed, lines of worry etched deep into his weathered features. He looked at her as if he wanted to memorise every detail of his only daughter’s face before she departed for the dangers awaiting her in King’s Landing.
“This will be my last night with the weirwood for a while,” she replied, managing a small smile. “I thought it only fitting to say my farewells.”
Her father hummed, smiling, but bittersweet, “I wish I could go beyond seeing you off, my sweet.”
It was no surprise that her father was not well enough to accompany her to the capital. For as long as she has known her father his body had been fragile, and the pain in his leg had only travelled north to the rest of his ageing body. It was not worth holding against him, Rosaleen thought, she was his only child, and it was heart wrenching enough for him, she thought, to watch her fly the nest.
“It is alright,” she replied, “Aly has a sharp tongue and wit, she will make sure I am there safely.”
Her father hummed, half-amused, stepping closer, his eyes scanning the ancient branches above them. “I don’t need to tell you that this life is…dangerous, Rosaleen,” he began, his tone both gentle and firm. “The Targaryens aren’t like us. They’re like fire, burning bright but unpredictable. What may seem like warmth today could become a blazing inferno tomorrow.”
Rosaleen’s lips pressed into a thin line. She had no illusions about what awaited her in King’s Landing. Marrying into House Targaryen was no mere arrangement of names and alliances, it was a bond with an ancient family that wielded fire and blood as its inheritance.
But she was not afraid.
He was but a man.
Her father studied her, his gaze heavy with something unreadable. “You are strong-willed, daughter. I know this. But should there come a time of need…” he stepped closer, urgent, “send a raven to me with a black feather. Whatever the message, I shall know what it means. And I will come with an army to fetch you, come what may.”
Her heart ached, but she didn’t let the emotion show. She knew he needed to see her strength now more than ever.
“Thank you, Father,” she said, her voice barely more than a whisper. “You know I shall not be calling on this lightly.”
“I know, Rosaleen.” He gave her a sad, quiet smile. “But I also know that you are still my daughter, no matter whose court you find yourself in.”
A raven above cawed, the sharp call echoing through the silent yard. She felt the shadows of her ancestors around her, felt the weight of their legacy in her blood and bones. And she felt, in that moment, a swell of both pride and bittersweet finality. Her father had given her everything he could.
Tomorrow, she would leave Raventree Hall, but she would carry all of it with her.
Her father gave her one last long look, then placed a hand on her shoulder. “Make them remember that fire may scorch the land, but the rivers remember their own.”
With a final nod, he left her to the night, leaving only the ravens and the weirwood to bear witness to her silent vows.
There was little privacy to be found within her retinue. With her father too ill even to make the two-week journey to King’s Landing, the responsibility of her male escort had fallen to Maester Carwyn, a young and less-experienced maester, but one who could be trusted to serve her family’s interests.
The older, more skilled healer had remained at Raventree Hall to tend to her father, whose health could not afford his absence. But Rosaleen knew that Carwyn’s loyalty was unquestionable, and, in time, should she have children, she would feel secure knowing that it was Carwyn overseeing their care. And hers.
The journey south was slow, the landscape unfolding before them in bleak tones of ash and ruin. The scars of war marred the Riverlands, fields once green and fertile now charred to barren emptiness, village after village reduced to smoldering ruins.
Rosaleen watched the silent devastation with a hard-set jaw, her gaze lingering on the skeletal remains of homes and the blackened husks of trees that stretched to the horizon. This was Aemond Targaryen’s doing, he and his dragon, Vhagar, had unleashed their wrath here. And now she was being offered to him as a balm to soothe the damage he had wrought.
As they neared Harrenhal, its twisted, melted towers looming on the horizon, Rosaleen found herself lost in thought. The ominous fortress held a particular weight in her mind, not just for its reputation, but because this had been the place where Aemond had nearly met his end in the bloody war.
She had heard the stories of his injuries, the months he spent in agony. How strange, she thought, to be heading to meet him now, healed, yet still scarred by the same war that had left the Riverlands in ruin.
"Look at this wasteland," Alysanne muttered under her breath, loud enough for Rosaleen and their cousin, Arianne, to hear. "The Targaryens scorch the very earth they rule over and then wonder why we don’t all bow down with gratitude.”
Rosaleen gave her a warning look, though inwardly she shared the sentiment. "Careful, Aly. The journey is long yet, and King's Landing is still ahead of us.”
Alysanne’s eyes gleamed with a mischievous light. "I’ll say what I like. I’m a Blackwood, not some Targaryen leech. And I’m sure your husband-to-be would do well to remember that.” Her tone was more playful than bitter, but Rosaleen could tell that her cousin’s words carried an edge.
She would have to be careful of that.
In contrast, Arianne, her cousin on her mother's Piper side, had a softer presence. Where Alysanne’s remarks came wrapped in thorns, Arianne’s were gentle, as if she considered the feelings of each listener before she spoke. She wore her femininity openly, her manners delicate, and her voice always lilting with warmth.
“Surely it’s better to look forward now. The war is over. What good is it to dwell on all this destruction?” Arianne said softly, casting a glance around at the desolation.
“Better to look forward?” Alysanne scoffed. “Yes, to look forward to watching my dear cousin bound to a man who thinks the Riverlands are his to burn on a whim.” She shook her head, tossing a rebellious lock of dark hair from her face. “Forgive me if I don’t swoon over the thought of Rosaleen sharing a bed with Aemond Targaryen.”
“And why not? I hear he’s quite… striking. People say he wears a sapphire where his eye once was and hides it behind a leather patch, so he doesn’t frighten the women at court,” Arianne countered gently.
Alysanne let out a derisive laugh, folding her arms across her chest. “Striking, perhaps, if one finds it charming to bed a man with blood on his hands. The very same hands that set these villages to the torch.”
Rosaleen had to press her lips together to keep herself from smiling. If she were to save her practicality, she would have to reign Aly in no doubt. “It’s the match I was given, and the match I must make. Railing against it won’t change that.”
Alysanne snorted. "Of course. But I will not hold my tongue in front of any man.”
Rosaleen smiled faintly. “If it’s your goal to ruffle feathers in the Red Keep, I have no doubt you’ll manage.”
She beamed with pride at the notion, whereas Arianne turned once again to her book, peering amongst the faded pages. She knew better than to quell the fiery personality of her kin.
It was only when they were south of Gods Eye Lake that anyone was able to see the sprawling landscape before them, and King's Landing sat proud in the distance. Mighty and grand.
He is there. Rosaleen though, the beating of her heart elevated slightly with anticipation.
Since halfway through their journey, Aly had stayed in the same carriage as Maester Carwyn, suffering with motion sickness from the ceaseless rocking. So Rosaleen glanced at Arianne, who watched with equal interest as the gates of King's Landing came into view.
“Are you nervous?”
Rosaleen wet her lips, dry from days of travelling. She thought of little more than the idea of a nice warm bath. “I think you are more nervous than I, sweet cousin.”
Arianne gave a tight lipped smile, and looked away, clutching her book, “I suppose I am. I have never ventured this far, and I am worried for you.”
“Do not worry for me,” Rosaleen replied, reaching over to place a comforting hand atop Arianne’s. “I knew what I was to face when we left Raventree. This marriage,” she hesitated, choosing her words carefully, “this marriage is my duty to our house. I do not fear the Targaryens, nor King’s Landing.”
Arianne sighed, her gaze drifting to the sprawling city. “It’s just that I don’t understand… how you can be so calm. There are so many stories about this place, about the people here, and the court. And Aemond—”
“Yes,” Rosaleen cut in softly. “But stories have a way of growing beyond the truth. I will judge him for myself when we meet.”
“I suppose you’re right. But if you ever need someone, anyone… well, you’ll have me here.” She managed a small, encouraging smile.
Rosaleen returned the smile, her fingers still gently clasping Arianne’s hand. “And I’m grateful for it. We may find we need each other more than either of us expects in this strange place.”
As the carriage rolled through the city gates, the noise of the capital filled their ears, the bellowing of merchants, the shouts of city guards, and the rustle of countless people moving through the winding streets. Rosaleen watched as they passed narrow alleyways, the crowded market stalls, the curious eyes of passersby who glanced at the small procession from Raventree Hall.
Above the din, a fanfare of trumpets sounded, and Rosaleen realised with a start that the Keep itself loomed closer, its high stone walls towering above them as they passed through the final gate. It felt like stepping into another world, a world that pulsed with its own heartbeat of secrets, dangers, and alliances yet to be forged.
The carriage came to a halt, and Rosaleen straightened her spine, taking one last look at Arianne’s worried face before the door opened. They shared a brief, comforting smile before Rosaleen descended, feeling the heavy air of the capital settle over her.
This was to be her new home.
The great gate of the Red Keep loomed before her, the sunlight shimmering over the cobbled courtyard where her retinue assembled, heads low in a mix of awe and wariness. Her own eyes swept over the towering walls before settling on the figures awaiting her arrival.
At the forefront stood Lady Alicent Hightower, her expression poised and watchful, her hands clasped in front of her. Beside her, Lord Jasper Wylde, the Master of Laws, regarded her with an unreadable gaze, his features giving nothing away. He dipped his head in a formal greeting as Rosaleen approached flanked behind by her ladies and Maester Carwyn.
"Lady Rosaleen," Wylde greeted, his voice cool and authoritative. "Welcome to King's Landing. On behalf of the council, we thank you for your journey."
Rosaleen curtsied deeply, her gaze briefly catching his. “Lord Wylde,” she said, her tone measured yet firm.
Alicent stepped forward, features softened. “Lady Rosaleen,” she said, her voice gentle but layered with authority. “It is good to finally meet you. I trust the journey treated you well?”
She offered her a deeper curtsy, her ladies doing the same with a small bow of their heads. “The road was long, Your Grace. But I am grateful to be here at last.”
A small, approving smile touched Alicent's lips, though her eyes remained sharp. “I’ve arranged for you to refresh yourself, and your chambers have been prepared to your family’s specifications.”
Rosaleen noted the formal tone, the careful selection of words, this was a woman as deliberate as any lord, accustomed to weighing every detail. “I shall endeavor to make myself worthy of the honor.”
Alicent nodded, her face betraying neither warmth nor indifference, only the weight of years spent managing such exchanges.
“I was sorry to hear of Lord Blackwood’s condition,” Alicent continued, “I have sent word to wish him well.”
A flash of surprise passed Rosaleen’s gaze. Whether it was a cold formality or a genuine gesture to extend courtesy to her family, it shocked her either way.
“Thank you, Your Grace, that's very kind.”
Her retinue had already begun to carry her personal belongings inside, diligently guided by servants of the Red Keep alike.
"Aemond is occupied this morning with matters of council," she continued smoothly, "but he looks forward to meeting you in the gardens once his duties are concluded."
There was no doubt that Alicent’s words were meant as both an apology and an expectation, a signal that her son’s duties came first, even before his own betrothed. But it did nothing to sway Rosaleen. A prince of the realm, this is exactly what she expected.
Lord Wylde spoke up, his voice carrying a hint of warning masked beneath polite formality. “You’ll find King’s Landing can be as unpredictable as the river currents of your homeland, my lady. But with such resilience as yours, we have no doubt you’ll thrive.”
Rosaleen met his gaze, giving nothing away. "The Riverlands are not so easily shaken. My lord. And nor am I," she said, a faint smile touching her lips.
If she were to look behind her, Arianne would be none the wiser, and Alysanne would be pressing her lips together to keep herself from giggling.
Alicent’s mouth too twitched, perhaps in approval, perhaps in caution. “Come,” she said, her hand gesturing toward the towering gates. “We’ll escort you inside. You must be eager to rest.”
Rosaleen followed Lady Alicent and Lord Wylde through the towering gates, their footsteps echoing in the vast stone corridors of the Red Keep. She felt the immense weight of the Keep settle around her, a sprawling, ancient place that loomed with shadows and secrets, its stone walls seeming to pulse with a life of their own.
They passed through grand halls lined with tapestries woven with the sigils of the great houses, the Targaryen dragons fierce and proud among them. Rosaleen’s eyes took in the details, the fine, intricate designs of each banner, the threads as precise as the histories they represented. She marvelled at the craftsmanship, at the reminders of both bloodshed and legacy. The Red Keep was beautiful, but intimidatingly so.
This is your new home, she reminded herself, feeling a tightness settle in her chest at the thought. She was no stranger to vast halls, for Raventree Hall had its own deep roots and ancient mysteries, but here the walls seemed to lean in, to judge her even as they welcomed her.
There was a coldness to the Keep that Raventree’s worn stones lacked, a reminder that here, she was an outsider.
As they ascended a wide staircase, Lady Alicent glanced back at her, observing her carefully, perhaps to gauge her reaction.
“You will find the Keep to be as boundless as the city itself,” Alicent said, her tone precise and measured, “though I daresay it can feel smaller than it truly is.”
She nodded though the Dowager Queen did not see. But she understood how a place as vast as this could be confining in its own way.
Eventually, Alicent led her up another staircase and down a quieter hall. “These will be your chambers,” Alicent said, pausing before an oak door, “most recently held by my daughter, Helaena.”
Rosaleen inclined her head, feeling the weight of that knowledge settle over her like a shroud. Helaena, the gentle princess, and then a queen, who had known her own tragedies, her life a mystery and a sadness to most of the realm. Rosaleen looked at the door, wondering if the walls within held her ghost still.
Alicent’s face softened, if only briefly, and she gestured for Rosaleen to enter. Her retinue were placing various items personal to her in indistinguishable piles, her ladies long since taken to their own suitable chambers. The furnishings were elegant yet subdued, and though the bedchamber was fit for a queen, it bore an undeniable emptiness, as though awaiting something, or someone, to bring it back to life.
Rosaleen turned back to Alicent and inclined her head respectfully. “Thank you, Your Grace.” She paused, taking in the faint sadness that seemed to shadow the Queen Dowager’s eyes. “I am deeply sorry for her passing. Her loss is felt beyond these walls.”
Alicent’s expression softened, though her gaze remained guarded, like she was accustomed to protecting her grief. For a brief moment, a glimmer of pain surfaced, a rawness in her eyes that she quickly concealed.
“Thank you,” Alicent replied, her voice quiet and even. She waited a beat before she nodded, gesturing to the walls around them. “Make it your own,” she said, her voice firm but not unkind. “In time, you may come to find comfort within these walls, as my daughter did.”
A reply was ready on her lips. But Lord Wylde, who had stood at the door, cleared his throat.
“If I may, Lady Rosaleen, Prince Aemond will be expecting you in the gardens shortly.”
Thank you for reading! Let me know if you would like to be tagged!
General Taglist: @1lluminaticonfirmed @aemondsfavouritebastard @all-for-aemond @bellstwd @blackswxnn
@blairfox04 @buckybarnesb-tch @castellomargot @cl-0-vr @eddieslut69
@emmaisafictionwhore @eponaartemisa @hb8301 @jamespotterismydaddy @justbelljust
@minholy223 @mochi-rose @natty2017 @nenelysian @nixiefics
@primonizzutto @qyburnsghost @randomdragonfires @risefallrise @sheshellsseashells
#aemond targaryen#aemond fanfiction#aemond fic#prince aemond#prince aemond targaryen#aemond one eye#hotd aemond#aemond x oc#aemond x female#aemond x fem!oc#aemond x original female character#aemond x original character#hotd fan fiction#hotd fanfic#house of the dragon#house of the dragon aemond#house of the dragon fanfiction#aemond angst#aemond smut#aemond targaryen fanfiction#aemond targaryen x oc#aemond fandom#ewan mitchell#ewan mitchell characters#aemond targaryen angst#aemond targaryen smut#aemond series#forged in flames#rosaleen blackwood#aemond hotd
257 notes
·
View notes
Text
At one point he was down in between my legs, fingering me, and he made a throwaway comment about probably being Autistic.
I leaned back, trying to relish what pleasure I was getting. “Well, we can talk about that subject, if you like,” I said vaguely, not really wanting to bring my professional life into things.
He kept working away at my body, kissing between my lips and thighs. “Oh I know who you are,” he said suddenly. “Your book changed my life. In a way, I guess this is me thanking you.”
I made him exit my body and we went to the kitchen to hash it out. It turned out he was a big fan of many things I’d written.
“I’ve seen you around the neighborhood many times,” he confessed. “But you posted online that you don’t like when people come up to you, and so I always decided to leave you alone.”
He said, “Your book is the reason I got divorced, actually. My ex-husband was a therapist, and when I showed him your book and said I thought I might be Autistic, he didn’t believe me. We have been separated for a year.”
He asked, “Did I just make this weird, telling you when I did that I was a fan?” I told him that if he’d said it sooner, I would have never fucked him at all.
People never realize that when they approach me, what they are doing is dragging me into work. It doesn’t matter whether I was at breakfast, or an orgy. I was just some guy standing there, enjoying his beer, but now they have made me the known scholar and author. And sure, my job might be meaningful, but that doesn’t mean I like to work.
I tell my friend that I no longer want to be a public figure, and that I am planning how to make it all end. She tells me, “You’ve got to do what is the best for you, even if it’s something that the rest of us wants and can’t imagine giving up.”
I ask myself, did I want this? It would be more flattering to say I didn’t, and play the role of the hermetic author whose work developed its own life purely because it was so good. But that isn’t true.
From the moment I got a Myspace account in high school, I was publishing essays about my political views. I serialized multiple novels on Tumblr, guerilla marketing them with giveaways and custom-made images until they hit the Kindle sales charts. I have made memes, tried starting viral trends, coined phrases, and given hundreds of hours’ worth of media interviews. I write prescriptive nonfiction, for Christ’s sake. Of course people seek guidance from me. I offer it up!
I have been strategic about how I dress, and my video backdrops, and retaken clips of myself speaking over and over again until they sounded right. I’ve hosted debates with my most vicious critics while I’m in the shower, started public beef with creators who had larger accounts than I did, and rushed to my keyboard when upsetting news broke, because I alone was possessed of the most correct take on it.
I wanted this. I didn’t know what this was, this internet fame I was chasing, but I did all I could to make it mine. I thought that by writing so much, I would one day be able to escape myself, maybe really feel connected to other people. Instead it has meant never being able to stop thinking about myself: how I am seen, what I am working on, how it all fits together, what comes next. It has also meant being spoken about, theorized about, and criticized, and developing a firm exoskeleton of disdain between myself and the world.
I believe now that that it is immoral for any person to be listened to by ninety thousand other people. Holding authority and status like that runs counter to my anarchic ideals. I am not more important or correct than anyone. I should not be trusted to tell people which commodities to buy, which companies not to support, what to read, what to think, what words to use, or how to conduct their lives.
All the other animals know there is no one way that a creature “should” live. There is only the way that it does. The world has no consciousness, no beliefs. It cannot pass judgment. We only feel so watched and evaluated because we have covered the planet with so many millions of our eyes. But we can stop performing dignified human goodness at any moment.
I think that celebrity is an evil, corrupting force that pits the human instinct for bonding against itself. Instead of appreciating the singing of our friends around the fire, we stream Chappell Roan until stalkers break into her house. Rather than playing card games together, we stan Twitch streamers, filling up their chats with highlighted messages until they acknowledge us. We long to be famous novelists because then we would have the social permission to write, and we don’t have the money or time to enjoy the activity on its own.
I wrote about Chappell Roan, stalker stans, and how turning art into content creation ruins the work, and the creator's life. It's free to read in full (or have narrated to you by the app!) on Substack.
194 notes
·
View notes
Note
Best way to approach the topic of the Captain’s disability? Also what’s ur opinion on the “post-game” art of the captain?
hi!! thank you for this question.. please keep in mind while i am (higher support needs, unable to be independent) disabled myself and i frequent disabled spaces, i am NOT a burn survivor nor do i speak for people who are! i would love to hear input from anyone who is, and corrections! but here are my thoughts on these things :]
abled people can reblog and such but please do not add anything. please kindly correct me if i am wrong on anything here and i'll add it.
the best ways to approach the topic of the captain's disability
one thing i see many people with facial differences like burns and such say is to not refer to burns as a "facial disfigurement", if you must refer to it, i've seen it said that "facial difference" is much preferred opposed to disfigurement. while this opinion is just that, an opinion, tread lightly here and use what you think it appropriate, but alwaysalwaysalways stay away from referring to curly's body as "deformed". i recommend checking out face equality international and the pheonix society for burn survivors.
on that note, pleasepleaseplease do not use curly's appearance post-crash as shock value or refer to it as "body horror". if it's newly burnt curly, i believe tagging him as gore or injury would be accurate as he hasn't been administered any real medical aid aside from painkillers and still very much is injured, but not body horror, and do not use gore or injury trigger tags for a rehabilitated curly; he is no longer injured in that case. this is a person. not an eldritch horror, not a monster, a disabled person. listen to disabled people about this, especially burn survivors.
don't say that curly's disability is his "karma", punishment, consequence, etc, or use the common "theory" that he is a metaphor for anya's unborn child. curly is not a child. disability is not a punishment. curly is a vulnerable, disabled, adult man. treat him as such. ableism & disability is as much of a theme in mouthwashing as rape culture & abuse is. curly does not stop being a flawed human adult man because he is disabled.
and, please do not debate whether it would have been best to kill curly, or say one of jimmy's crimes was "keeping curly alive" in his burnt state. while curly's injuries are absolutely to some extent exaggerated, and injuries like that would be much different in real life, curly as he is presented in the media is alive, conscious, and aware. he is not actively dying, based on the fact he can be kept alive (albeit with significant pain) without much effort in an area without any actual medical aid besides what anya can do for him. these discussions easily segue into eugenics, especially if you are an abled person.
generally, just approach his disability with the fact in mind that he is still living, conscious, thinking, and a person. do not allow yourself to dehumanize him or infantilize him on the basis of his disability, or act as if curly is "dead". curly is still alive, he was not lost in the crash, he is just disabled now. in game he has proven that he is still very much aware, very much alive. do not ignore this.
ALSO. a fandom thing, but PLEASE. PLEASE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD. DO NOT USE HIS DISABILITY/CONDITION FOR ""WHUMP"". PLEASE. PLEASE. PLEASE. and please also just as much do not use them as a gag or joke or for the punchline of one.
my opinion on "post-game captain curly"/rehabilitated captain curly
i see absolutely no harm in it! real people are burnt and then treated and rehabilitated. so long as it's not a way to attempt to erase his disability, i see nothing wrong with it. a disability is not a death penalty, even extreme burns! burn survivors are still people who can live happy lives after their burns.
however, do your research when writing/drawing about rehabilitated curly! look into how to draw and write burn scars, facial differences, how healed burns may affect people later on, the treatments done for people with extreme burns like curly's, etc. especially look into info written by burn survivors (but please don't go around asking random burn survivors these things)! when drawing, reference real people, look up pictures and look at them! do lots of research, ask lots of (respectful) questions when it's appropriate.
some things to avoid: the mask trope, there isn't a real reason to cover up his burn scars, and especially not just to use it as a shocking moment later. avoid needlessly mentioning a recovered curly's disabilities and burns, or using it as a point of pity/sympathy.
some things i recommend you look at: face equality international's 'international media standard on disfigurement', cripplecharacter's tips on writing/drawing a character with facial differences/disfigurement, niki averton's tips for writing about burn survivors, saszor's guide to drawing burns, an interview with zaid who is a burn survivor by SBSK
173 notes
·
View notes