#& my parents are literally watching me live / up close & personal. jumps off their fancy balcony

[1ight]

even tho i know its silly, it FEELS like there is nobody i can even TALK to without invoking some kind of judgement , however private, whatever our relationship. once again i miss my therapist lol… she would give me solid life advice

god it feels so fuxking deeply scathingly embarrassign to be me these last 6 months, despite rationally kmowing better… idk tho everything just keeps getting harder to combat or recovery-mindset myself out of, & meanwhile, the hole that is sucking my life towards hell just keeps revealing itself to be deeper & deeper

[shadedrose01]

Crushes and Cuddles

Ship: Parkner (Harley Keener/Peter Parker)

Summary: Movie night at Avengers Tower

Tags: Movie Night, Febufluff, snuggles, Couch Cuddles, Sleepy Cuddles, Platonic Cuddling, Romantic Cuddling, all of the cuddling, we love cuddles, Avengers Family, Pre-Relationship, Peter is smitten, Precious Peter Parker, Bisexual Peter Parker, Gay Harley Keener, Boys In Love, The Outsiders movie, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Acting as Harley Keener's Parental Figure

Day one of Febufluff: "Snuggles"!

--

Peter swings higher, pushing his body forward into a flip before he lands graceful on the metal balcony, the air puffing out of his lungs. He checks the clock in the corner of his vision one last time as he walks into his room, and grins. 7:28pm. Perfect timing.

Normally, Peter would still be out at this time, swinging around the town, helping old ladies cross the street, stopping robberies, saving lives, his usual routine patrol. However, today was always different. Today, Peter always cut his patrol short.

Today was Friday. Friday's meant movie night at the Avengers tower, and every second Friday, Peter got to join them. And today, this friday in particular, he knew (or, he hoped) that somebody else would be joining them too. Just the thought of it caused butterflies to grow in his stomach, and his heart to race, a big, goofy smile on his face as he rips off his mask and taps the spider emblem on his suit.

Peter changes quickly, knowing the others wouldn't wait on him if he was late, and rushes downstairs. As soon as the elevator doors open, the sound of hearty chatter and laughter rushing to his ears, the smell of buttery popcorn fill his nose and making his mouth water.

He can only take one step into the room before someone is shouting out to him, "Hey, shortstack! Thought you weren't gonna make it!"

He rolls his eyes at Sam's tease, strolling into the room, following the sweet, sweet, delicious scent over to the three leather couches surrounding a wide screen tv. "I'm almost as tall as you now, you know. And I wasn't that late! I was only-" he glances at the sleek black watch on his wrist, a gift from Tony for his birthday a few months back. "Three minutes late!"

"Three minutes too long!" Bucky chimes in, a shit eating grin on his face. Peter just rolls his eyes again.

The Avengers were scattered across the three couches, Bucky sitting in between Sam and Steve on the far right couch, the smaller one of the three, Bruce, Natasha, Wanda and Clint all sitting on the middle couch, the longest one, while Tony and Pepper were sitting on the last remaining couch, the far left one, similar in size to the right side. There was slight personal, polite spacing in between all of them, but Peter knew that wasn't going to last, not that he was complaing. So, he strategically chose to go sit beside his mentor, who wraps an arm around him as soon as he sits down.

"Leave him alone, you two," the older man states, ignoring the immediate whining of "always taking the kids side!" and "no fun!" coming from the two grown ass men sat across from them to put his full attention on to Peter, his face softening. "How was patrol, kid?"

Peter beams. "Good! There wasn't anything crazy happening tonight, so I just helped some people out. One lady locked her keys inside of her car, and only left the window open a crack, so I had to send out my renessant drone to swoop down and grab them for her. I helped an elderly man across the street! He was so sweet, and offered to buy me ice cream, which I totally would have accepted but I had just eaten my sandwich, so I had to decline, and then-"

"Can we watch the movie now?" Clint cuts him off abruptly, but clearly without malicious intent, just impatience. It was Clints turn to choose the movie, and he was clearly ready to watch whatever he chose. Peter wasn't offended, he tended to ramble anyways.

Peter smiles sheepishly as Tony rolls his eyes and waves a hand. "Yeah, yeah, go ahead, drama queen."

As everyone settles in and the beginning credits for 'The Outsiders' starts to play, Peter glances around the room one last time and frowns, leaning into Tony, whispering. "Is Harley coming down?"

Harley. Harley Keener, the boy who had helped Tony fight the Manderin as a kid, who had finished high school early and moved in with Tony to start scouting out Colleges and Universities, who had caught Peter's eye the minute he had walked into the room for that first time, and hadn't left his mind since. The object of Peter's growing, apparently obvious affections, as literally everyone in the tower knows about his not so subtle crush except for Harley. And they all love to tease him relentlessly about it, much to Peter's embarrassment.

Now is no exception, if the twinkle in Tony's eyes is anything to go by. At least he has the decency to whisper it back to him so nobody else will hear. "He had to write an essay or something, said he'd be down later. Don't worry, Petey, lover boy will show."

"Not my lover boy." Peter grumbles, feeling his cheeks burn as Tony snickers beside him and turns back towards the screen.

It happens slowly, as it always does. Everyone starts to relax, sinking back into the cushions as they watch Ponyboy and Sodapop bicker playfully, the small space between bodies slowly slipping away. Wanda is the first to truly break it, her upper body slowly slipping to the left before connecting with Clint's, her head resting against his shoulder. He just slips a hand around her waste and pulls her gently closer before proping his feet up on to the coffee table placed in the center of all of the couches. After that, its like a chain reaction, everyone falling into each others space. Bruce lays against the armrest, his arms wrapped around Natasha who lies on his chest, her legs stretched out over the couch and falling into Wanda and Clint's laps. Both Sam and Steve cuddle into Bucky, Steve resting his head against Bucky's chest, arms wrapped around him tight while Sam just leans against him, seeming content.

Pepper, Tony and Peter were already sort of cuddling before the movie even began, but Pepper shuffles in closer to Tony, pressing a kiss to his cheek before he turns and presses one to her lips, and Peter takes a page out of Natasha's books, squirming out from under Tony's arm to lay across the couch, head cushioned by a pillow and feet pushed underneath Tony's tights, his toes warming up instantly. Tony glares at him lightly for breaking the moment, Peter just sticks his tongue back out in response.

It's about midway through the movie, Ponyboy having just bleached his hair blond when Peter hears the elevator doors opens, and soft footsteps pad out towards the doggie piles.

"Took you long enough, Keener." Tony teases first, head turning just as Harleys figure comes into view, and Peter's breath gets knocked out of him. He's not wearing anything fancy; in fact, Harley is in his pjs, wearing a pair of old red flannel bottoms and a ratty black t-shirt that's full of holes and stains from working in the workshop. His hair is messy, not combed and obviously just tossed back by his hands, and he looks like he hasn't gone out at all today, he probably hasn't. To anybody else, Harley probably looks comfy, lazy, but to Peter, Harley is stunning no matter what he wears, his beauty shining through whatever clothes he throws on, and he has to remind himself to breathe, looking away quickly before he gets too worked up, his face ablaze.

Tony quirks an eyebrow at him, smirking, but he thankfully doesn't say anything, doesnt point it out as Harley responds, "I had important shit to do, old man, you know that."

A chorus of "language!" rings out as soon as the words are out of Harleys mouth, the boys only response being a heavy sigh, sounding annoyed but with an undertone of amusement. The boy then glances around, his light, bright like a summers day blue eyes clearly searching for a spot to sit, and Peter feels a shot of anxiety, knowing that it was now or never if he wanted to put his plan into motion.

When Harleys gaze lands on him, Peter swallows his nerves and holds out his hands, putting on his best puppy dog pout while doing grabby hands, hoping, praying that Harley will get the hint. The older boy rolls his eyes at him, but his face brightens with a wide smile that causes Peter's heart to flutter, and he reaches forward to clasp his hand into Peter's, practically sending Peter into cardiac arrest. Peter tugs him over gently, Harley flopping onto the couch, his back pressed against the back of the couch but the rest of him is pressed against Peter, his legs tangling around Peter's, one arm wrapping around Peter's back, the other curled into his chest, still hand in hand, his head resting against the crook of his neck and shoulder.

"This okay?" Harley murmurs, his breath puffing against Peter's collarbone, and Peter's body is on fire, full of a burning warmth that wraps around his chest and leaves him breathless. He can't answer verbally, so he just nods firmly, wrapping his own arm around Harley's waist to hold him in place, a wide grin firmly placed on his face. He doesn't care if Harley only means this in a platonic way, if hes only doing this because everyone else is. He cant seem to care, savoring every moment he gets of Harley pressed in close, almost as close as possible to him, and trying to retain it in his memory.

Near the end of the movie, the day catches up to Peter, the heavy pressure and warmth on his chest soothing him into exhaustion, his blinks getting longer and longer as Ponyboy jumps into the burning church until he cant find the energy to open them again, giving into the tide of sleep that gently eases over him.

Peter wakes up to a message on his phone of a picture of the two of them wrapped around each other, Harley curled up to his chest and Peter pressing his face into Harleys hair, fast asleep. And a month or two later, when Peter finally confesses his feelings for the older boy, and the two start to date, the picture ends up being framed, placed on the small table beside Peters bed.