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taeyeonchannel · 9 years ago

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Taeyeon stay strong <3

Respect Taeyeon

I never write posts about this because they stay in my mind and I find my thoughts on this are usually irrelevant. I use this tumblr largely as a way of venting my childish and unprofessional sides and to keep track of the things I personally thought about in order to grow up.

This topic though, is one I do want to write about, because I’ve kept silent about something that means a lot to me and is something I’ve paid attention to force the past 9 years. The world cares too much about public persona, they care too much about perfection from people in the spotlight and we force things on people.

When I grew up watching SNSD and fell in love with Taeyeon’s music, I was an immature kid who didn’t really understand anything. You’ll find my phone, my computer and my blogs littered with things that are Taeyeon influenced. My attempt at doing art is also influenced by her and I’ve wanted to pick up colouring because of her too. The fact is though, I was devastated when I heard about her dating scandal two years ago. I remember where I was, I remember how I found out and I remember how I reacted.

I found out while I was on the station platform transferring trains to work in Japan, when I was checking facebook and I saw that my good friend had liked a comment on Allkpop’s facebook that was a breaking post about the two dating. Now, even as a fan I had a lot of things I was concerned about and I can’t say I was happy about the news but I can’t say I was personally hurt by it. What happened afterward killed me inside. When fans discovered the instagram photos of the two and how they imitated one another - I felt that was inappropriate from the two. A platform designed to help them interact with fans is not an appropriate place to hold a love life - I think people forget that facebook pages/public twitter/public instagram is a marketing tool for important people. It is not a place to interact with your boyfriend / girlfriend unless people are following you for that (which, as an idol, is never). I think that is the only mistake they made, but I think that in young love, in foolish love, it’s totally an excusable mistake.

We expect public figures to take their private lives being public knowledge to be acceptable. Business leaders of tomorrow are being taught to assume private lives and public lives to mean the same thing. Compared to Justin Bieber, and Miley Cyrus, Taeyeon and Kpop idols are perfect angels. But in reality, they live with the same issues, they deal with the same problems, and we assume that it’s acceptable. We need separate private and public lives, and it pains me to know that idols pay a price at latest around the age of 18. That’s right, Taeyeon debuted almost 9 years ago, in August of 2007 at age 18. We call 18 years old to be an adult, but you talk to anybody - you do not understand the world at age 18. In exchange for fame and publicity and sometimes money, you give up your private life, you give up the chances of doing other things and you give up your future. We can reflect upon this at age 25, and 30 to start to understand what this impact is for an 18 year old. But at 18 years of age, do you think anyone understands that trade off? No, and you can’t teach it because it takes experience to learn.

Fast forward almost 9 years, Taeyeon today is the person she is because of the people, the fans and her job. Taeyeon is thoughtful, careful and selfless. Fans adore this about her, I adore this about her. She ran around in an airport helplessly trying to apologize for her mistakes. Give me any person in the world, who would shame themselves in that fashion to do that. Can you fathom the amount of courage needed to do that? To find a random stranger to hope that you can get your message out to people? To me, that shows me that she understood her mistake, she felt so bad about it she couldn’t sit still. A person who cares that much about you - the fact that she would publicly shame herself to apologize - how as a fan who adores her character, how can you not fall in love with her more? To me, this reminded me why I would be her fan forever, why I still to this day put her as my all time favourite idol and why I will continue to support her activities as long as I can.

People complain about the new persona about her being a paper human. People complain that she sits around at home. She pretends that she enjoys sitting around at home, she says that she likes sitting at home alone doing things by herself, but that she feels free when her members pull her out of her home to do things. Do you really think that she’s always been that way? If you’ve watched Taeyeon since the beginning, when she’s yelling that she can succeed on a bridge, shouting out as a way of boosting her own confidence, it should pull at your heartstrings. That is an 18 year old girl trying to pull herself up. That is not a person who sits around at home all day, that is a person who put everything she had into succeeding.

She sits around at home more because she’s afraid that her actions will affect her fans. She’s afraid of the things people will say and people will do when she goes outside. It’s not her choice, it’s the reality she’s been forced into. It appalls me, it pains me, but more than anything else, it gets my respect. There’s a line in an SNSD show where Sooyoung talks about the young fans who chase after them and yell and scream at them and how it’s cute. Then she talks about uncle fans who tell them to be healthy and wave from afar. She said she thought it was because uncle fans weren’t as energetic and young. I don’t think she really understood what the difference was when she said it, but I think she does now and now that I’ve grown up too, I’ve finally realized what it means. The uncle fans understand the hardships more, and they understand that their best way to support them is to cheer them on.

Taeyeon stepped down from being leader because she didn’t think she was doing a good enough job. Give me any leader in the world that would willingly do that, to publicly out themselves to help the group survive. We act as if it’s easy, but you need to give up your pride to do so. She chose it, because she thought it was for the sake of the group. Everything she does, she thinks about it for hours, her face whenever she’s alone is one of deep thought, worries that no one else thinks about. I love her voice, I love her music - but the person behind that voice is why her music touches your heart. She understands emotion, thinking in ways that is different. How do you express different levels of sadness, stress and anger if you haven’t carefully thought about them or experienced them. To me, her singing really shows how much she’s been through.

I love her music because her voice can calm me and keep me sane no matter what I’m going through. You listen to “I” and you just feel relaxed. Listen to “Stress” and you can feel the uncertainty and hesitation. One of my biggest life goals is to listen to her sing live, because I want to hear her and experience her voice for myself. I would give up a year of my life, if not more, to have that experience. That’s how much I think I would gain from that experience, because her actions have helped me mature far faster than I would have without her music.

She cares about her average fan far more than the average fan cares about her. She’s given up far more than any average person, even most fans, and she’s gotten a lot of things that she didn’t want in return for what she did want. She hasn’t once complained about this publicly and to this day, she continues to smile through it and accept the reality she chose 9 years ago. Girls’ Generation as a group is halfway to the end of their era, my first favourite group, Shinhwa has been around for 18 years. People can say what they want about Shinhwa, but their era is over - they still do their job as the legend for the fans and I will forever be a fan for that, no matter how long they stay together. I hope the same for GG, but I want Taeyeon to start flying.

Respect Taeyeon for what she has accomplished. Respect Taeyeon for embracing her reality with a smile. Respect Taeyeon for the care she gives others. Respect Taeyeon for the love she shows her fans. Respect Taeyeon for the way she learned from all the things she’s gone through.

Forgive all the idols for the mistakes they make. Be aware of the fact that idols don’t know what they’re getting into. Be understanding of their young age and lack of real life experience they have. Don’t make anyone else suffer. People laugh when Taeyeon told Gfriend’s Yuju to protect her knee during the Me Gustas Tu stage. Anyone who knows the Me Gustas Tu choreography knows the scene where Yuju slides on her knee through the legs of Umji. Taeyeon is careful, thoughtful and understanding. She wanted to say something that showed she was watching carefully, she wanted to say something that would be meaningful to Yuju and she wanted to give her advice. She had time for one sentence, and she managed to give a piece of advice that had tons of meaning in it. Think of how many interpretations that piece of advice has. It can be funny, it can be important to the current promotions, it can impact her longevity as an idol and it can show that the experienced idols want them to succeed. If you’re going to be a fan of idols, understand what your job as a fan is. If you don’t understand, follow the actions of those with more experience than you and learn from them. Kids do this, adults do this – even a monkey can do it. So please, if you have the intelligence of a monkey, think, and learn before you act. Respect Taeyeon. Respect idols. Respect others.

#Taeyeon #Respect Taeyeon #TaeyeonChannel #Girls' Generation #SNSD #Soshi #SONE

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taeyeonchannel · 9 years ago

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[TRANS] Taeyeon Interview in K WAVE, March 2016

The colours of Taeyeon’s solo albums seem to be a bit different from existing SNSD. After , <Rain> was unexpected.

What kind of songs did you think I would do?

Let’s see. Somewhere in the middle between SNSD’s innocent image and Taeyeon’s cute and bright image?

Haha. My personality tends to be free and not rough, so the songs are similar to that. It feels dreamlike. I like things that are natural. Just something that’s free.

Your natural and free disposition is reflected in the album.

That must be true. There were fans who said they felt a new charm from my first solo album .

Whenever you release a record, it’s an all-kill. It was like that this time too, right?

I’m just embarrassed and thankful. My first solo album received a lot of love so people continued to anticipate following that. This album is a digital single but there was such a big reaction that I received a lot of congratulatory phone calls from many people. From manager oppa and family, which goes without saying. Even from people who didn’t contact me during gave me a lot of congratulations over the phone.

What did SNSD members say?

For members, it’s natural because they witness the preparation process I go through for music. They’re calm, like ‘That’s okay’. (Laughs) If they overreact by saying they knew that would happen, they knew it would do well, or saying it’s daebak, it makes me squirm. Haha.

When you decide on an album concept, do you have input?

I tend to show the results to Tiffany. Before the record is open, I show the unedited versions of album photos or music video to Tiffany. I don’t know why but I feel like she’s sharp. I feel reassured once it goes through Tiffany.

So what did she say? Her first impression of Rain.

She said she really liked it. She said it’s different from what she had been thinking and the music video has a feeling of being somewhat natural and raw. When you watch a SNSD music video, all of the members’ outfits are matching and we dance in synchronicity. She said she likes it because it was filmed comfortably with everything a bit more relaxed, with a different feel from (SNSD music videos).

After listening to , I wondered if this album would have a similar feel. I thought it aimed for a free and hippie-like feeling. I felt a rock-like image but <Rain> is different.

This time, it feels like jazz is mixed in. These days, music is not locked in a single genre. There are songs that mix jazz with R&B, and it’s difficult to narrow down to a single genre. If you look at the mood, <Rain> is R&B-like, jazz-like and ballad-like.

Even so, should I say that it has the unique scent of a Korean song? It’s a bit familiar.

Really? Then I’m relieved. All of the songs I received were all created by foreign songwriters so I did worry that it wouldn’t match with Korean sensibilities. It’s probably became more natural with Korean lyrics.

Taeyeon’s solo album songs are sophisticated.

It’s somewhat pop-like but also feels ambiguous.

When I listen to your solo album, I can feel Taeyeon has been longing musically.

Ah, me? I wasn’t thirsty, hahaha. With SNSD and because I sang momentarily on OSTs, I was satisfied with that, but when I look back, I don’t think I’ve ever really felt like I’ve sang to my heart’s desire. Through solo activities, now I feel like ‘I am singing’.

Since you are part of a group, instead of Taeyeon’s individual colour, you couldn’t help but show SNSD’s colours, right?

If SNSD sang bright music that fit the girl group image, now it’s good to go in the direction of the style where it contains stories that I want to tell.

That must be why many people are saying, ‘Ah, now Taeyeon’s individual colour is showing. It’s mature. She grew musically’, as they are listening to Taeyeon’s solo album.

But there’s no ‘this is the type of music I really want to do’. The music that I’m into changes from time to time, and even if I want to do this type of music this time, next time, I want to try different music. If you look at it one way, it could be that my own colour is not clear, but if you look at it another way, it could be that I can do any genre.

Isn’t similar to looking for clothes that fit you still?

I think so. I’m still looking.

If people are expecting something different from you musically, isn’t that overwhelming?

Of course it is. As more time passes, there are a lot of friends who debut who are young, pretty and fresh. People are attracted to new and flashy things. So before a comeback, we really worry a lot over what kind of appearance we need to show, or what we should do. Because of a lot of activities, I also think we’ve saturated our image. We are promoting in Korea, of course, and Japan as well so we worry about what we should show now.

The lifespan of idols tends to be short. Since there’s a window of time for activities.

That’s right. So when we go to music broadcasts, I wonder if it’s a place where we should be. Because there are young friends who are fifteen or sixteen. There is a 10 year age different between me and Red Velvet’s Yeri. She was born in 1999. I was born in 1989. It’s an occasion where you are being seen so it’s obviously overwhelming when you’re developing a concept. You can’t help but worry.

SNSD Taeyeon, solo Taeyeon, TaeTiSeo’s Taeyeon. Isn’t it difficult to pull the weight of three teams(?) at the same time?

There are members who act, we’ve each divided into several fields and with a lot of individual activities, I don’t think we’ve been able to show people a lot of our musical side. TaeTiSeo, as a representative of SNSD, has been able to show the appearances and music that SNSD hasn’t been able to show and it has been able to fulfill the musical side so I’m glad. What I can show with members and what I can show alone is different, so it’s almost not that difficult. I actually really like it.

You said you wanted to discuss a lot about music during the interview, so I felt like you’ve had a musical awakening.

It’s because the only thing I can do well is music. (Laughs) Recently, I’ve been hearing questions asking me if I’m going to act. Everyone is acting so I’m asked if I think about acting at all but I would like to sing properly, at least once. I haven’t yet done it to the point where I’ve reached my limit. Since I’m out publicly as a singer, I’d like to do it properly at least once and then attempt other things.

You’re so cool.

I want to do at least one thing properly.

You must have heard you’re doing so well many times but despite that, your heart is still modest, which is admirable.

It’s not possible to satisfy yourself. Everyone is like that. (Laughs)

The premise of ‘Because he/she is an idol’ must have been my own prejudice. So I thought everyone was the same.

If you say idol, you could think of them wanting to appeal in a visual, external way. In every genre, it would be nice to show myself, but I still think the focus is music. I’m always asked about various things like fashion, style or interests but I only really want to talk about music.

Your laughter is very vigorous. Actually, my close friend really likes the sound of Taeyeon’s vigorous laugh but they were disappointed that it’s difficult to see these days. They heard it often when you were a radio DJ in the past.

I was a bit immature. When I was a radio DJ.

Has your personality changed a bit? As you were passing your teens to your mid-20s.

Even when I think about it, I think I’ve changed a lot. I started radio when I was 21 and when I think about it now, I was too young. I had just turned 20 and became an adult. I read and told stories, as if I knew things. Now when I think about it, whew~ Back then, I hadn’t experienced much so whenever I commented, I thought that I was inadequate. So I did vignettes, like a variety show, and I couldn’t help but be a bit brighter. My personality became like that, even without me realizing it. As time passed and I got older, I became more mature. When I was active as a young idol, I asserted my own opinions and went through conflicts with many netizens, and I’ve grown up through that. I was hurt a lot too. ‘Ah, this is how I’m being perceived. That’s not my intention. I can be viewed like this.’ I think I’ve felt a lot of these types of feelings.

I think you mature through hardships where you definitely get hurt and the healing process that follows.

I think when I was a radio DJ and my maturity period were interlocked. I was really thankful for radio. After stopping radio activities, there were no opportunities to talk. I would chat excitedly and now that I was doing barely any variety shows, there were no opportunities to talk. One day, when I was doing an interview, I forgot how to speak. When the camera light went on, I would stumble over words and after that, I’ve had times when I would feel nauseated around cameras.

No one would have imagined that Taeyeon would have camera nausea. There are people who say your music colour has changed a bit. As your personality changed.

Should I say that my personality is a bit dark? There’s a side of me that’s a bit sensitive. If I’m with members, I’m playful. Normally, I’m very quiet. I like being alone. Of the members, I tend to be the one who is least likely to enjoy things.

Isn’t that why you play well with puppies? You share stories with a puppy at home?

What do I do when puppies like me? They just like me blindly.

I think your personality has been reflected in the album a bit.

Yes. When I was starting solo preparations, I was thinking about what kind of songs I should sing and decided that cool and calculated doesn’t suit me. Since I like comfort and honesty, I vowed to show music that was similar to that. Sexy female singer doesn’t suit me and I’m not BoA unnie, so I didn’t even imagine showing a performance. I’m only starting now so I really wanted to just return to the beginning, so I wanted it to feel like starting to draw on a blank paper. So the song that came out of that was .

Is there a method or a standard by which you select the song?

Every entertainment company has an ANR department. It’s a department that manages recordings and when there’s a record planned, they contact many songwriters. After that, ANR staff does the first round of filtering and then lets me listen. After that, we discuss together and that’s how we choose.

That must be how you chose <Rain> this time too?

Yes.

How was it? When you first heard it?

As soon as I heard it for the first time, I really liked it. I really liked the beat. They said ‘Do you want this song? Or should we give it to another team?’ and I said ‘No, who will you give this to? It’s mine. I’ll do it. I’ll do it’. (Laughs) They said ‘Will this style be okay?’ and asked me one more time and I said ‘I completely like it?’. The company didn’t really like the second song <Secret>. I said this is mine. I said I need to do it no matter what, and the company couldn’t win. There are a lot of people who like that song, more than I expected. I couldn’t believe this unexpected result. Of course, there are songs that I liked that didn’t do well.

Right. Wasn’t there a phenomenon of, if Taeyeon doesn’t like it, it does well?

It was like that during SNSD. I didn’t like <Gee> and <Oh!>. But the year that we promoted with that song, we won a big award and we were #1 for 9 consecutive weeks. I wondered why the songs that I liked didn’t do well.

They must’ve been songs that were between popular appeal and artistic appeal.

I don’t think my code fits with popular appeal. Songs with popular appeal have a hook that repeats so it’s good to sing along to. More so than songs like that, I like songs where you can’t tell where the refrain is and where the second verse starts. I really like songs that are fantastical or lounge music.

Then, every rookie singer should sing their song for Taeyeon. If you hear it and you don’t like it, it will do well.

That’s just for SNSD. Hahaha.

This song is emotional and rhythmical; the groove is nice. Taeyeon’s voice rings out strongly. Your voice is a bit sinewy. Should I say it’s high-toned and you can feel the energy? So I thought soft songs would suit but this song suits well too.

More than this being my style, I think I’m expressing in a way that matches the song. That’s not really a good thing. I feel like I don’t have my own specific colour. My voice and colour is not coherent so every time I record, I always think ‘Ah, how should I do this?’ It’s difficult. Of course, people say it in a positive way. They tell me that it’s actually a good thing that I can express songs, without being tied to a genre, and if you hear it like that, it can be a good thing too. But I have more instance of mental breakdown than anything. Still.

Singers, or idols, or SNSD is so famous that there are many instances where you have to limit your behaviour. If you do that, there’s less opportunities for experiences and it could be difficult to express those feelings.

That’s why I purposely watch a lot of movies. When I watch movies, I can feel this and I can feel that. I think ‘Ah, there are people like that too’. As expected, there are a lot of limitations. Where would friends who have become famous young go to experience things freely? But I started my adult life first so I have a lot of conversations with adults, and learn a lot through stories with staff members. It was big, getting hurt at a young age. I think it’s necessary to have time to get hurt. A little. (It’s hard if it’s a lot.)

Artists need to freshen their minds. How do you do it?

I’m still looking for it. I’m very much a homebody, so I think the only thing I do is drink occasionally with members. After I got my driver’s license and had a car, I drove around but paparazzi followed me around, so I had to stop. Even that became a limitation and I became conscious of it, so I call friends over to my house, or I spend time with members.

It makes me a bit sad. What do you do at home?

I drink, I watch movies, just really wholesome. Food (she hesitates for a moment)… I have to order it. I can’t cook. (Laughs)

What’s a dish you’re good at (cooking)?

A dish? Can I say cereal? I live with Tiffany right now. Tiffany’s personality is very outgoing. Thanks to her, I go outside and do things. You know, American friend culture. Whenever it’s any special day, she says we need to make cupcakes. She tells me come do things while halfway making cupcakes. So I end up doing it with her. When she says we need to bake cookies, I bake it with her. She says we need to write a card, so I write one. No matter what, she says we need to do it together. (Laughs) So I think I end up moving my hands at least because of this.

Isn’t personality contagious? Or become assimilated.

Mmm, I don’t know. Our tastes are a bit different. But we are very compatible. If Tiffany is red, I’m blue. But fascinatingly, we are compatible. I think it’s because we’ve lived together for a long time. It has already been over 10 year since we’ve lived together. We don’t provoke one another because we know the other person’s dislikes. We avoid what the other person dislikes and we know each other well. When I make fun of her, I know the limits. So I end it right there. Even if she gets mad, I know what I can do to loosen her up. So I do it up to that point. I don’t not do it. I do do it.

Your relationship with the members are still very good. You still do things together.

I’ve been with them longer and more than family. I’m from a rural area and because I came to Seoul when I was young, I’ve seen the members more than family. Even if I see them for the first time after a month without seeing them, it seems like I saw them yesterday.

Are your tastes in music different from Tiffany?

I think we have similar listening tastes. Fascinatingly, listening to music is different from singing it. There are genres that are easy to sing, which are different from genres that are comfortable to listen to. Our listening is similar. But when it comes to singing, we each have different tastes that we want.

We heard you listen to Rihanna often.

I heard she has a new album so I’m listening to it. I like strong music like this. I like hip hop, R&B and soul - I really like those. But if I end up doing music like this, I’m not sure if I will be able to express it well.

When you’re alone, aren’t you practicing rapping?

There was a rap when I was preparing for the TaeTiSeo album. But I couldn’t do it. It was my part and every time it was that moment, my mouth wouldn’t open. So I passed that part along to Tiffany. It was a song called <Stay>. But I couldn’t do it. It doesn’t come out. I protested why they’re making me do something I haven’t done before and they said just try it once. But I said I couldn’t do it.

Then we’ll say that you’re not thinking of doing hip hop.

Hip hop is not just rap. Hahaha. There’s hip hop R&B and there’s a lot more so I can’t give it up yet.

Truthfully, you did with Verbal Jint. There’s rap in it.

I’m not sure if they were joking with me, but again, manager oppa told me to do that rap. There was female rap too. But it was too much for me to rap. Even more so, I didn’t think rap was right for my first album and I think I still need more time for rap. We’ll put rap on hold for now.

#Taeyeon

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