sweet-despair

[sweet-despair]

Junko: *shouts at Mukuro*

Makoto: Is there anything we should do?

Yasuhiro: Yes, don't piss Junko off anymore.

[sweet-despair]

Junko: Not to be melodramatic, but if someone gets their hands on that cash before me, I'll gouge my own eyes out. And yours.

Makoto: …

Junko: And everyone else's too. And actually, not mine.

[sweet-despair]

*Miu comes home absolutely drunk, undresses, and stands in Kaede's bedroom*

Kaede: Babe, are you… coming to bed?

Miu: No thank you, I'm sure you're lovely but I have a girlfriend.

Miu: *Lies on the ground and falls asleep*

Kaede: …

[sweet-despair]

Junko: Mikan, my dear.

Mikan: Yes?

Junko: I want to get something off my chest.

Mikan: Is it your shirt? Please say it's your shirt.

Junko: No, your hands.

Mikan: But-

Junko: Off.

Mikan: 😞

[sweet-despair]

Mukuro: I've divided your bills into three categories: "Impossible", "Next to impossible", and "How the hell did that happen?".

Junko: And I've divided my sister into three categories: "Annoying", "Super annoying" and "How the hell did that happen?".

[sweet-despair]

Seller: Mr. Kamukura, come to the counter, please.

Izuru, approaching the counter: Is there a problem?

Seller: This girl claims that she is with you.

Seller: *points to Junko*

Junko, nonchalantly: And I got lost.

Izuru: I didn't even take you with me, how did you-

[sweet-despair]

*at Junko and Yasuke's wedding*

Mukuro: To my new son-in-law, i want to say this

Mukuro: You have released me. This monster is yours now.

[sweet-despair]

Yasuhiro: *says something*

Junko:

Junko: Come here.

Yasuhiro: No.

Junko: Just come here.

Yasuhiro: No, you’re gonna hit me.

[sweet-despair]

Munakata: It's time to put an end to Junko's outrages!

Yasuke: I'll get on with it.

///

Munakata: How's it going?

Yasuke: I took care of her

Munakata: Great, and-

Yasuke: And she took care of me. We talked all night. We decided to get married in May.

[sweet-despair]

Yasuke: What happened to my biscuits?

Junko: It's over

Junko: If it makes you feel any better, it wasn't very tasty

Yasuke: But you ate it anyway?

[sweet-despair]

Nagito: *Looking at Makoto*

Nagito: Baby boy. Angel.

Nagito: *Looking at Junko*

Nagito: Evil.

[sweet-despair]

Mikan: Are you WiFi?

Junko: Uhh… what? why?

Mikan: Cause I am feeling a connection.

Junko: Well… the WiFi has a password and only Yasuke knows.

[sweet-despair]

Sayaka: Imagine if you could come back and take out five people who had made you suffer. Who would they be?

Junko: I only get five?

Sayaka: …I remembered your birthday this year, didn't I?

[sweet-despair]

Miu: Yes, we are best friends, but I would fuck you if you asked.

Kaede: What?

Miu: What?

Kokichi: She said she would fuck you if you asked.

[sweet-despair]

Junko: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give JUNKO ENOSHIMA lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the woman who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons!

[sweet-despair]

Junko: My mom didn't raise a fool.

Yasuke: She raised a mentally unstable bitch with a stone instead of a heart.

Junko: But not a fool.

[sweet-despair]

Junko: ... ––– .–. .–. –.––

Izuru: What's that?

Junko: Remorse code.

Izuru: I'm even angrier now.