strawberrygirldick

[strawberrygirldick]

Reasons I love Metroid

- The villains call themselves the Space Pirates. Not just any space pirates. THE Space Pirates

- It’s established that destroying planets is the easiest and best way to deal with your problems

- Pinball

- The soundtrack is “the most beautiful, haunting melody you’ll ever hear” and “beep boop”, with no in between

- The most deadly, virulent parasite in the universe looks like fruit gummy

- Official comics repeated show that Samus is addicted to circles

- Samus’ pet raccoons are apparently highly skilled star pilots

- The Japanese tagline for the series is “Metroid Fun-roid”

- Despite all of these things, the series never takes itself anything less than 100% seriously

[strawberrygirldick]

im in so much physical pain i might died

[strawberrygirldick]

Over the last couple of years, I've been paying off some emergency dental work that I needed to get done, and I have about $1400 left to pay. In another couple of weeks, I have an appointment to get wisdom teeth removed, which I don't yet know the cost of.

A week ago, I was victim to a theft that took the majority of my savings. I really hate asking this, but I'm hoping to get some help with paying off my dental work, because I'm now in a much more precarious position. If you'd like to help, you can through my ko-fi, and I'm willing to give my Venmo (though it has my deadname on it). I'm willing to do some writings for anyone that helps out (and not just the smut that I normally do).

$0/$1400

[strawberrygirldick]

y'all HAVE to watch this...interview??? with the inmates of the prison where luigi mangione is being held.

the reporter is standing outside the prison walls, while the inmates are inside watching newsmax, and collectively screaming out one-word answers to questions loud enough to be heard by the reporter.

I've never seen anything like it

[strawberrygirldick]

What selfshipping is like

[strawberrygirldick]

literally could have been so cunty if they didn’t change the proportions…

[strawberrygirldick]

Showing off the assets

[strawberrygirldick]

common misconception! Thomas Crapper didn't invent the flush toilet. it was actually patented by Alexander Cumming. what Crapper invented was the floating ballcock.

[strawberrygirldick]

Hey so not at all for important reasons, but I would like to ask some things about the recent character you played on DnDorks, Googirl.

First: Is she left handed or right handed?

Second: Does she celebrate christmas? If so, does she go all out?

Third: Is there any holyday themed food/drink she likes? (Like gingerbread flavoured milk or something)

Thank you for your time!

Oo! I’m happy to answer!

First question: Goo girl is right handed!

Second question: She does celebrate Christmas, but none of the religious aspects of it. She’s all in on Santa Claus type shit, and she goes waaaaaaay too overboard!

Third question: during the show every time goo girl ate I went out of the way to make her feel at things that I’m allergic too (I have a severe dairy allergy so I can’t have any milk/butter/cheese without dying), so to continue with that trend, eggnog. She fucking loves eggnog and drinks way to much of it

Thanks for the questions!

[strawberrygirldick]

the edit itself

this edit is getting taken down from tiktok every time someone reuploads it, its straight up censorship at this point

Im not even american but im having a great time with this

DONT LET THIS DIE

credit to miraculousgastropod for the original

[strawberrygirldick]

After being reprimanded for approving his clients' insurance claims, Bob Parr nearly kills his boss at Insuricare

The Incredibles (2004)

[strawberrygirldick]

Honestly people aren't ready for a live action Squirrel Girl. They want a mildly quirky sex symbol.

But Squirrel Girl is weird. She's WEIRD weird. She's autistic and barely bothers to hide it. She is very loud and annoying and insanely progressive. Her best friends are all people of color who are extremely opinionated and one of them is trans.

She openly talks smack about Nazis. She's thick as fuck and not just in a comic way she's a big girl. She has a round face and buck teeth. She has no filter. She loves herself.

Squirrel Girl is so much more than just a furry stand in crush and honestly a large majority of the fan base would not like her. She is a GIRLS girl and her best friend writes loki cat fanfiction.

She is cringe and free and too good for this world. IF WE EVER SEE HER IN LIVE ACTION WE WILL DEFEND HER AT EVERY STEP

[strawberrygirldick]

A sitting Congresswoman got a gay man arrested for shaking her hand. If you’re wondering what the state of the Republican Party is right now.

[strawberrygirldick]

I used to see this image all the time in December but now literally nobody cares. We as a society have forgotten him. All he wanted was to offer us a nice treat and what did we do? We abandoned him. Hell has taken refuge in our hearts and its fires have burned to ash all warmth and love. We should be ashamed.

[strawberrygirldick]

@itti-the-mouse

WHY ARE YOU MARKED RED ON SHINIGAMI, WTF DID U DO

i cant even post moths anymore. because of woke

[strawberrygirldick]

WHY ARE YOU MARKED RED ON SHINIGAMI, WTF DID U DO

i cant even post moths anymore. because of woke

[strawberrygirldick]

trans-friendly