starlitlolita

[starlitlolita]

[starlitlolita]

Sometimes people think that cutting only happens when you’re having an intense breakdown. Which rly is the case sometimes. But most of the times after a while it becomes an addiction and it’s just a coping mechanism you repeat over and over again to stop yourself from spiraling

[starlitlolita]

find myself listening to music i loved years ago and i realize i still am her

[starlitlolita]

[starlitlolita]

[starlitlolita]

[starlitlolita]

It’s hard to like yourself when you know how bad of a person you really are.

[starlitlolita]

another funny story

flashback to last Friday when I was depressed as fuck and my friend asked me to come out drinking. i being the reckless stupid bitch I am got way too drunk but I kind of thought my friend would take care of me. Haha oops my mistake no. She made new friends and soon she abandoned me. Last thing I remember clearly is sitting in a bar. Next memory I’m lying on a cold floor or bench ? And there’s a guy. Not sure how I got there. Black out again. Hahah this time I’m tripping, he’s holding me up barely. Black out. I’m on the edge of a bed. I can feel my hip bones protruding in the cold, where’s my dress? I remember the way he looked at me. The way he traced my skin. Black out. He’s fucking me. Black out. I’m on top of him? When and how? Black out. He’s pushing me down on my knees. Black out. My phone has over 50 missed calls. My mother. My father. The local police.

[starlitlolita]

hey to the 0 people reading this 😇

I literally have zero friends, I’m so god damn sad and I have no one to tell this to or talk to. Which is partially my fault because I never open up. But also none of my friends really care about me yay

Literally my friend abandoned me the moment she made new friends. My other friends are to busy actually living productive lives to care about me. I don’t blame them for it.

[starlitlolita]

hahaha

remember when I was 16 and my mom made me rip up my diary with her and throw it out. Now I’m afraid to write down my thoughts on paper. And I question my ability to recall past events. Sometimes I question whether some things really happened or if I’m just going insane.

[starlitlolita]

Because I’m afraid you will leave me. 2.13.2017

[starlitlolita]

[starlitlolita]

nothing can kill me but me

[starlitlolita]

[starlitlolita]

*.。.☆゜・*:.。.☆**☆.。.:*・゜☆.。.* 

*. s    u    f    f    e    r    i    n   g  .*

*.。.☆゜・*:.。.☆**☆.。.:*・゜☆.。.*

[starlitlolita]

[starlitlolita]