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yeah but what if I came back and rebooted...
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stephanie beatriz as candy in the trailer for half magic (2018.)
#『 ⋆ regenerations ⋆ 』𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘧𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘴#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. travel kindly#『 ⋆ ooc || the peacemaker (ros 6 and 7) just... are everything to me ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || but this fc / ro 6 ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || she's born from a companion dying; from having enough ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || enough of injustice enough of war ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || the doctor 'heals'; the master destroys ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || the peacemaker is born to bring a different kind of balance ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || they both bring so much war for their causes ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || she's the universe's way of balancing things out a little ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || but also the fact? romana 4 is this tiny traumatised punk who just... runs ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || romana 5 is so angry; full of grief but finally facing it with a little bit of hope ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || romana 6; this one; chooses to embrace kindness and hope again ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || to the point where romana 7 is everything the war president / romana 3 should have been without war ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || romana 6 is magnificent and doesn't get enough thanks for it ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || with her ridiculous pink roots ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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tardisnamed:
WHO IS SUSAN FOREMAN? That is a question that she has been struggling with a lot lately. Ever since regenerating she just can’t seem to pin it down. Actually, she supposes that she lost herself before that. During the war she was someone else entirely. Even though she doesn’t like to think about herself back then doesn’t mean it isn’t true. And then afterwards she was impulsive, volatile. She couldn’t think about herself without thinking about the fact that she lived when nobody else ( or close to nobody else, anyway ) did. So she chose not to think about herself by engaging in reckless adventures, just willing each one to be her last. That’s how she got here, in this body.
Alex’s death. That’s what started her crisis of identity.
She won’t ever be the same. She knows that. But she doesn’t want to be. That’s what regenerating does – it makes you someone else. When she died a weight was lifted. There is still a darkness that will always be with her, but at least she is no longer full of rage. She can think clearly. Maybe, one day, she can even be happy.
She can’t say she’s very happy right now.
“ HEY… HEY… ” Susan backs up, her arms outstretched defensively. The thought to reach for her blaster crosses her mind, but she lost it in the last skirmish. This is what she gets for responding to an emergency signal without thinking to ask any questions. By the time she arrived on the small, comet-sized planet everybody was long dead and replaced by parasitic clones. They had tricked her into coming all so they could feed on the time energy emitted from her vortex manipulator. That’s why the stupid thing won’t work now. She was going to have to force open a rift to reconnect it, but she can’t do that if she’s dead.
Looking around, Susan wracks her brain as she tries to think of what to do to get out of the situation. “ Stay where you are. ” This incarnation seems to have a tendency to talk incessantly, but she can’t think of anything to say now. It’s not like it matters. The clones never understood anything she said before. All they knew was to attack… which makes it a bit odd that the woman isn’t attacking her now. The others lunged as soon as they saw her. And not only that, but she seems to have understood what Susan said. Or at the very least registered it as words which is a big improvement from the blank looks of nothingness she was receiving before. And her face is far more detailed than the fake people she had been dealing with. Clones always seem to mess up the little details…
Long arms quickly grab the nearest rock, and Susan holds it out as threateningly as possible. She wants to seem bigger, scarier, but her eyebrows are raised in a way that show she’s curious. She’s not sure what to think. “ Who are you? ”
@stardustghost / starter call
* THE SHADOWS SUIT HER, romana has learnt to begin to find comfort in being out of sight. it’s a rare thing indeed - for her every breath to not feel like it’s being analysed, for her to move without risking being pushed into the very soil beneath her feet by the pressure she can’t escape. she’s trying. she’s truly, deeply trying. it’s a bitter kind of irony that haunts her every waking moment: her previous, second self had been borne with sunshine in her veins and a talent for seeing hope in the darkest corners, && because of that she was always doomed to die too soon when war had come knocking. kindness is so rarely rewarded, softness always punished.
❝ not that I don’t believe you’ll use that... pointy rock, but at the angle you’re holding it you’re more likely to hurt your hands than little old me. ❞
who is she? who is she? oh that question burns and blisters. romana, regent. a ghost, a warrior, a lost cause. she’s far too many things and far too few all at once. for all her efforts to find an answer the more she finds herself drowning in uncertainty. the shadows ask no questions && it’s all the easier to lose herself in the task at hand.
the woman is scared and her battle to empathy is lost.
❝ what’s your name? ❞ asking a question in answer to a question, how terribly rude. she’s not ready - willing - to answer yet so she settles for answering as vaguely as she can whilst remaining honest. ❝ breathe. I’m no threat. to you anyway. ❞ there’s no such thing as a harmless being in times such as these. no. that’s wrong. there’s no such thing as a live harmless being in times such as these. but instinct promises her that the other, for all her threats, is unlikely to be too dangerous.
or maybe she’s just hoping she’s wrong.
moving again romana sits on the edge of a larger rock, brown eyes down as she opens a boot, slowly tugging it off to empty it of aggravating little pebbles torturing her from within leather. ❝ wouldn’t attack cinderella now, would you? ❞
#tardisnamed#『 ⋆ ooc || this has taken 600 years and I'm so so so sorry ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || but I'm finally properly on romana and aaak ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || ily I'm sorry ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ 003. ⋆ 』𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. the war president
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habibi - tamino
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riscng:
𝐚 𝐰𝐚𝐱𝐢𝐧𝐠 & & 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐆𝐎𝐃𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐒 , 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐞𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 , 𝐚 𝐜𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐠𝐚𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐬𝐩𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚 𝐰𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦. it isn’t as if she doesn’t know the SCIENCE behind the earth & & her moon , but there is a mystery yet UNEXPLAINED by human means. ( a meaning to the beauty ) –––––––– a conversation now HAD between palm of the hand & & the extraordinary life held in a little BLUE shed.
“ it’s a secret. ” adventure BEAMS in twin dimples of soft cheeks. she turns her ATTENTION towards the other corporeal form , momentary focus shifted. ( it is not a language she can repeat , not in this tongue ) but she can still FEEL it all. tally grins , a little hum on her lips without thinking. “ she’s wonderful. she’s amazing , look at this library ! ” then softer , to herself , the witch MULLS , “ she knows , too. ” –––––––– the moon does sing.
“ what does it sound like to you ? ” she asks , curiosity SPARKLING on lashes.
* EXPLAINING IT FEELS IMPOSSIBLE, but if anyone stands a chance at grasping it it’s tally. the little witch who was so almost destroyed by war, whose youth and tenderness could have been sacrificed at the altar of the universe’s cruel demands for no reason other than punishment for being a little too good. a little too tender. the stars have never been forgiving to those whose hearts beat like war drums. a secret. oh, romana is used to those, to the things that cannot be admitted.
❝ a secret? how terribly tempting. ❞ she gently gives the console a rub and the tardis sings again, a soft tune that feels like the very stars around her. the tardis knows so much, so many secrets, she remembers the fires that engulfed their planet - she remembers the weeks romana spent stumbling through ashes to collect the half burnt books that fill her library. ❝ she sounds like the closest to home I have. ❞ of grief, of joy, of supernovas and endless winters. her tardis deserves a name - deserves more than romana can give her.
this time she moves closer to tally, her smile back and playful. ❝ close your eyes and give me your hand. I’ll show you how she sounds to me. ❞
#riscng#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. the stars still may shine#『 ⋆ 001. ⋆ 』𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘵#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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#『 ⋆ regenerations ⋆ 』𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘧𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘴#『 ⋆ musings ⋆ 』 𝘱𝘭𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. the war president#『 ⋆ 003. ⋆ 』𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴#『 ⋆ ooc || I love the war president so much more than you can imagine ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || I don't write her often bc she's hard ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || but I have... so many feelings ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || and look how incredible this fc is ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || my poor space child ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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skyllarks:
“CALL IT OLD AGE,” the Doctor replies with the ghost of a smile on their lips. Their hearts ache for all the years that they have lived, all the pain that they have endured and the love that they have felt. They are tired of the grumpiness and of the dark. Now that another period of darkness in their lives is over, they are slowly, carefully, allowing themself some softness, not to mention that they have always been a sentimental idiot. Always moving forward with occasional glances to the past. How tempted they have been to visit past friends, those that are long gone. They hardly allow themselves the opportunity.
“I remember. It’s why I took you with me, I believe. I’ve always loved a challenge.” And what happy ending could either of them find? All the Doctor knows is to run, run, run. It’s been their whole lives. Considerations of settling are long gone, brief moments of optimism in their past. And how could the last Time Lords ever find peace before death anyway? How was that even possible when they could not return home? “I hope you find it, Romana. I think you may well deserve it.”
* CALL IT OLD AGE, which one of them is older? do they even know? romana has no way to judge - so many of her memories, so much of the time war is missing from her head. even the memories she still has feel like poison in her veins: taunting her with the reality she can’t escape from. the doctor, the wannabe healer of the very stars, had been a soldier when it came down to it. romana - she’s been so many things. the orphan of a planet she’d once been the president of, who’d come so close to being able to bring change. her legacy has become death, exhaustion all she knows. the doctor is, at their core, soppy, so what does that make romana?
❝ you didn’t have a say in taking me with you, not to begin. then you got used to me. ❞ she counters with a surprising lack of venom. time has sharpened her teeth: her first regeneration could strike to hurt, but she’s long since learnt how to go for the jugular. ❝ I deserve nothing at all. perhaps the constant screaming, the taste of ash, is the prize my presidency deserves. ❞ perhaps one day the screaming will get too much and she’ll simply shatter into shards of something that once resembled a woman. ❝ can you even remember how many people have travelled with you over the years? all those whose paths were changed? ❞
#skyllarks#『 ⋆ threads ⋆ 』 𝘢 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘪𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘭𝘦#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. sanity or truth#『 ⋆ 001. ⋆ 』𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘵#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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you’re a dying thing that never quite dies. still desperate, still trying to keep going, to keep flying— to prove you’re alive.
the difference between surviving and living | m.a.w (via dvoyd)
#『 ⋆ quotes ⋆ 』𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘵𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧#『 ⋆ musings ⋆ 』 𝘱𝘭𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴#『 ⋆ mannerisms ⋆ 』𝘴𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘢𝘳𝘦#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. sanity or truth#𝘢����𝘤𝘩. the past becomes you#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. the war president#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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quantumstarpaths:
It isn’t that Paul doesn’t like interest. It’s something he looks for in people, in fact. It isn’t the interest that bothers him, isn’t the fact she’s trying to learn, or the fact that she’s questioning him. He believes there is little worse one can be than ignorant, and she is making the effort not to be, which is something he can appreciate. The problem is that he can hear the doubt in her voice, and there’s a difference between people questioning and people doubting, and he’s familiar with both enough to be able to tell them apart. “What part of it is confusing you?”
* SHE DOES HER BEST, does her best to keep up the charade. playing young, playing human, playing as if the technology that fills this ship isn’t horribly outdated to her. oh how she respects them - fragile little dreamers. life would be easier if she’d been allowed to keep living her existence truly believing she’d ever been one of them. playing ditzy doesn’t suit her, especially when she spends so much of her time expertly avoiding all questions about herself. ❝ this is wonderful! really. you should be proud. it’s just a little... convoluted? convoluted, yeah. ❞
#quantumstarpaths#『 ⋆ ooc || I am... so sorry about her ⋆ 』#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. sanity or truth#『 ⋆ 006. ⋆ 』𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘬#『 ⋆ threads ⋆ 』 𝘢 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘪𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘭𝘦#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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Caroline Penvenen in Poldark 2x05
#『 ⋆ regenerations ⋆ 』𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘧𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘴#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. a taste for hope#『 ⋆ wardrobe ⋆ 』𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘴#『 ⋆ ooc || every time I remember all romana ii is going to go through ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || it devastates me ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || she truly had so much potential for happiness if the war hadn't come ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || she could have been a magnificent president ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || and whilst war president romana does her very best ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || it's the death of all romana ii was meant to be even before she regenerates ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || she deserved more than having her joy and softness stolen by war ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || romana ii is who romana iv grieves for as much as her planet ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || she doesn't ever believe she'll have that potential again ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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STARTER CALL | @spacetrekked romana vi for soji !
* THE TRUTH IS DIFFICULT, romana has done her best: her best to move on from all the people she’s been, her best to focus on building herself a new era she can be proud of. the peacemaker is someone new, someone who is meant to help. she couldn’t protect dahj, time away resulting in her own absence when the woman needed her most - when she should have been able to help.
she’s had lifetimes of guilt, it’s time to stop drowning.
soji doesn’t need to know the details of why, of how important dahj was. she has her own grief, her own loss, romana is used to mourning alone. ❝ come on. there must be a planet you’d like to see. an era. something fun. ❞
#spacetrekked#『 ⋆ ooc || based on our discord chats bc I gotta ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || romana loves them both a lot ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ closed starters ⋆ 』 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘴𝘺𝘭𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦#『 ⋆ 111. ⋆ 』𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. travel kindly#『 ⋆ 001. ⋆ 』𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘵
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Exile, I thought again; that is to be saved, and unrelated to anything. One of the circles of Hell, but which?
Christa Wolf, Cassandra: A Novel and Four Essays (tr. Jan van Heurck)
#『 ⋆ quotes ⋆ 』𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘵𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. the war president#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. sanity or truth#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. the past becomes you#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. best dig two graves#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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destinedgreat:
no fun felt like an understatement. his species’ history was bathed in its own genocide, his existence outlawed by all of heaven… his mere birth a crime worthy of death. and oh, had they tried! heaven, archangels… even god himself, but somehow… somehow, he was still standing. broken and bruised, but standing nonetheless. how was that? existing? a moment passed, before the right word came to the child, voice quiet and hollow. “ … hard. ”
but she, she was an alien! stop moping, kid! focus on that! an alien ——– a real life alien. like star wars, but actually, really real! and if it was any other time, any other moment in his life, maybe he’d be more excited about that, babbling about aliens, and the fact that they actually, truly existed. a very old alien from a nearly extinct species. so, she knew what it was like… to be alone. to be alone in the world, with no one… no one who understood. suddenly, the universe clicked.
“ … so… you’re like me… ”
* IS HE LIKE HER? he best hope that’s not the way his life is headed. full of sorrow, self sacrifice, far too much life. the greatest gift the universe can give is to know the right moment to simply... be done. which is better? he’s so young, instinct tells her younger than he looks, the soft ‘hard’ more relatable than she would ever wish on anyone. survivors rarely get a say in which parts of themselves get traded away: hard barely even starts to cover the constant struggle of being one of a kind.
or, at least, when she gets her hands on the master she’ll either be one of the last two or she’ll happily leave the title of final survivor to the doctor. they’ve had it before, the sorrow suits them better. ❝ trust me, duck, it’s a good thing there’s few like me. ❞ not one of the good guys - not one of the bad guys. or at least she’s never been intentionally evil but romana can hardly pretend being unintentionally evil is truly any better. she is what she is.
❝ how are you both so young and so... not young at once? ❞
#destinedgreat#『 ⋆ threads ⋆ 』 𝘢 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘪𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘭𝘦#『 ⋆ 111. ⋆ 』𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. sanity or truth#『 ⋆ 001. ⋆ 』𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘵#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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#『 ⋆ regenerations ⋆ 』𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘧𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘴#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. the past becomes you#『 ⋆ ooc || I really do love romana 5 ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ wardrobe ⋆ 』𝘩𝘶𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘤𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘴#『 ⋆ ooc || my parisian darling ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || and by darling I mean barely subtle but very caring brat ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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timewarn:
𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐈𝐒 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐀 𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐃 𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐀 . even if it is to save gallifrey . though it certainly wouldn’t be the first time that the time lords have made such reckless attempts to prevent their own fates . it wouldn’t ever stop them – right or wrong . 𝐁𝐔𝐓 𝐇𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐒 . sometimes he’s loathed to admit that , but he’s gone out of his way for them before – why wouldn’t he do it again . especially since it’s romana who is asking . he sighs softly , knowing well enough that he’s absolutely never going to say no , and sits back in the uncomfortable wooden chair . ❝ alright . ❞ he answers begrudgingly .
he could laugh it all off , pretend it’s not serious , 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐓'𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐁𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 . because , frankly , it isn’t his business at all . he made sure of that when he left the first time , and extra sure of that when denied to lead . now he only goes back when he has no choice . 𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐎𝐄𝐒 𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐁𝐄𝐒𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄 𝐒𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐈𝐓 𝐍𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑 𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐍𝐒 . but he can see that romana is serious , that this is serious , and even if it breaks all rules that the time lords ever invented gallifrey is still his home . he doesn’t want to see it destroyed . he doesn’t think he wants to see what she’s seen , but he also doesn’t want her to feel like she’s completely alone here . 𝐒𝐎𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐒 𝐇𝐈𝐌 𝐇𝐄'𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐇𝐎𝐏𝐄 . one might call that ego , or one could call it empathy . he picks up on it in the same way one picks up on a paper cut or a hang nail . annoying , painful , and quite frankly intrusive . but it definitely gives him an advantage from time to time that he never had with his other faces . he’s not quite figured out what that advantage is or how to use it , yet , but it has come in handy from time to time .
❝ show me . ❞
* CONTACT / CONTACT / CONTACT, the air dances�� in the silence between them as brown doe eyes tightly shut. her mind is her own and her secrets, the memories she still has, will accompany her to whatever nameless planet her final death will someday be on. in her own universe, in her own sky, gallifrey is no longer even a dot, just empty space and empty grief. this is the face that can’t be forgiven - the doctor in her timeline who made the impossible choice. but he hasn’t yet. gallifrey here still stands / still has a chance to maybe someday be better than it was and the peacemaker craves a peaceful ending. just this once, can the stars not take mercy on her?
if the memories she does still have are so awful, she has no desire to know what the ones her mind pushed down into the abyss beneath her hearts are like. so regardless of how it hurts, how familiar memories are laced with exhaustion and agony her features never show, for a moment she allows herself to simply be romana again. the romana who tried so hard to be good, the romana who failed yet still somehow lived. she’s here, across from the doctor, yet they’re complete strangers to each other.
the images burn her from the inside out - until she can feel her edges crumbling inwards.
gallifrey screams over and over, && just for a moment she’s not the only person who has to hear it. destruction is easier to grasp when it feels real; can the doctor feel it? how some parts of her still echo with fire, healed only on the surface, never free from how it all still follows her. sharp brown eyes open again, picking up her tea to sip at it ( pushing the ash back down, pushing her soul back down ).
❝ the echoes stop after a bit. ❞ sometimes.
#timewarn#『 ⋆ 001. ⋆ 』𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘶𝘯𝘣𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘵#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. travel kindly#『 ⋆ threads ⋆ 』 𝘢 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘪𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘭𝘦#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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#『 ⋆ music ⋆ 』𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘯 𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘳#『 ⋆ likes ⋆ 』𝘢 𝘭𝘶𝘹𝘶𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘴#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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STARTER CALL | @brvesouls romana ii for sif !
* HOW LONG HAS PASSED? since she left the doctor’s side and began her journeys by herself. duty && expectations have formed her life since her looming, born with a duty she never asked for and an unforgiving planet. but she’s free at last and clinging to her own decree, time to be her own romana, to explore the stars and shape herself into her own image. this second face of hers is full of joy and hope, soft, blue eyes young and shining.
this time she gets to choose who she becomes. face borrowed from a distant princess, mannerisms borrowed from too many people to keep track of.
❝ oh, you have to see it. ❞ gallifrey, home, may keep calling her back but she’s far from ready yet. her smile pure sunshine as she twists upon her feet. ❝ come on. a little adventure, you and me. we’ll be back before you’re missed - it’s a waterfall of actual diamonds. ❞
#brvesouls#『 ⋆ closed starters ⋆ 』 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘴𝘺𝘭𝘭𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦#𝘢𝘳𝘤𝘩. a taste for hope#『 ⋆ 003. ⋆ 』𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦𝘴#『 ⋆ ooc || romana ii because she and your sif would viiiibe ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ ooc || also pre war bc for once she might as well be happy ⋆ 』#『 ⋆ queue ⋆ 』 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭
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