srimahardika

[srimahardika]

Ia Harus Selesai

Ia, harus menangis lagi

Pada khayalan yang Ia ciptakan sendiri

Baris cerita yang Ia buat lalu menghancurkannya

Pada sosok yang terlambat Ia sadari

Yang kini menjadi luka hatinya yang paling dalam

Ia tidak mungkin menyalahkan Tuhan.

Sebab ia sadar, ini pasti baik untuknya.

Mempertanyakan Tuhan adalah bentuk pembangkangan

Yang ganjarannya adalah penyesalan

Namun menerima TakdirNya

Menghadirkan sesak yang terlampau sakit

Mengiris setiap lapisan tubuh hingga yang paling dalam

Merelakan satu-satunya jalan yang harus Ia pilih

Sekaligus juga paling menyakitkan

Penantian akan takdir yang lebih baik menjadi ketakutan yang menghantui

Pertanyaan kapan menjadi mantra yang menyebalkan

Namun, tulisan ini ditulis untuk ditertawakan

Pada hari jawaban Tuhan itu datang

Menyembuhkan semua luka, yang lama membiru

Yogyakarta, 6 Juni 2024

[srimahardika]

My Four Weeks Project

Field break is over, now it's time to back to site! I am so happy spending days of Ramadhan at home, hopefully we can meet again in a year. For the last few days, I feel like I lost a lot of energy. I didn't really excited to do anything; I just want to sleep and won't do anything. There are lots of work on hold, and I have to move on. that's why I am gonna list the things I have to do during my duty:

Contractor KPI Report March 2024

CoW Report TW I 2024

Submit TW Report to Minerba

Discovery Assessment

All EVIM that still hold

All PR that still hold

Sign

Share Point Page

Training: Jungle rescue and collapse

A better TMP and HIRA

Well, at least that's what I remember. I will update you later.

[srimahardika]

100 Days Commitment

Hi tumblr. here I am again. Since my old tumblr account failed to open, I decided to create this new tumblr account. Today, I tried to contemplate. Thinking about what I’ve done, what I’ve achieved, where I am now, and the goal I have in the future. I am so grateful for what I’ve achieved now and where I am now. Having a life that I’ve never ever imagined before. I never imagine living with the facilities that I have today. I don’t even wash my own clothes and no need to cook for eating. But there is a deep fear inside my heart. My fear is my relationship with God. I am afraid, the pleasure I have now keeps me away from him. I’ve honestly started to feel it, sometimes. Yet, I really want to try to make it not getting worse by starting my 100 days commitment. I hope the impact not only improve my relationship with God, but also makes my life and career better. Indonesia has just finished a general election. There are a lot of plot twists occurred in each candidate. But I learned many things in this election. Especially about never giving up. And there is always something good in every bad situation.

I give myself time to think about what exactly I will do for the next 100 days. Then I will come up with my commitment along with the things that I can tolerate. I will record it all in this tumblr. Because for me this is the most comfortable platform for my writing.

See you on my 100 days!