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twitter . com/JOJO_magazine/status/1858646509497315617 Araki drew the whole squad for the magazine cover!!! we're eating so good!!!! he removed prosciutto's hair buns again though haha

Removing the hair buns is a crime against me personally, but oh god I just answered the previous ask and I'm loving the picture overall! We are eating so good indeed, Formaggio is giving me fresh life.

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jojo magazine cover with the guys! what do you think?

The color palette is delectable, really enjoying Formaggio and Melone together, I always thought they would make a fun duo and Formaggio is really getting his dues in this one. Pesci in the forefront? Unheard of yet much deserved. Also gelato's fit? Heck yeah!

Only things I'm sad about is Ghiaccio almost lost in the crowd and Prosciutto's lack of hair buns, everything else is great!

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what do you think about this?

HOLY MOLY, that might just be a holy grail right there!

Thank you for showing it to me, I await developments...!

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Ham And Cheese - Submitted by: fastman27

#25253C #A68E49 #E2B45E #A75D39 #7B2D22 #5B1515

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are you still on hiatus?

I am, due to work, though I do miss the squad - I just haven't had much inspiration on top of not having time. If I do get inspiration though, I'll be sure to post my thoughts!

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I am honored! Also I just realized that you did the amazing fanart of my Squadra as HTTYD dragons - you posted those from your personal blog, which had your art blog in the description and that is how I made the connection at last :D I loved the art and I love the color palette too <3

Off-Color Tennis Ball - Submitted by: fastman27

#E1823E #C75727 #A92B17 #5B1111 #2C0B0B

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“Fine. Here goes…” Prosciutto shakes his right hand free to brush it ever so gingerly to Formaggio’s cheek. “You’re my ray of sunshine. My right hand man. You’re my favorite off-color tennis ball,” he rubs his hand over Formaggio’s ginger scalp, brushing his thumb along the length of the cut on the right side to drive his point home.

-- Calling it (as they see it) by Einzel

@fastman27 IS THIS A REFERENCE TO MY FIC

Off-Color Tennis Ball - Submitted by: fastman27

#E1823E #C75727 #A92B17 #5B1111 #2C0B0B

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La Squadra in detective fiction

Giving a variety of flavors for each, I've been absorbing Sherlock Holmes and Agatha Christie stuff like a sponge lately.

RISOTTO

As a detective: One of those grimy hard-boiled types who has to get his hands dirty in more ways than one to get his evidence, though when it comes to obtaining information, his intimidating stature and demeanor get results very quickly. When he makes his interest in the case known, only the most hardened culprits stand a chance of not keeling over from heartburn on the spot, leading to fast results.

As a mere suspect: Interrogating him is like trying to squeeze blood from a stone. He's not very observant or judgmental in general, so unless he had a grudge, it's difficult to get his opinion on anything or anyone, and his taciturn nature compels him to stay quiet if he thinks that what he knows can't possibly have any bearing on the case. He's mostly right there because he spends too much time in his own head.

As the culprit: Too obvious, say the sleuths, especially if the murder was violent, so he's often taken up and dismissed with the feeling that his being the solution sounds too easy. It would take spending time with him to realize that he has a very smooth touch and doesn't need his brutal strength to get the job done, though that depends on the victim. Would only do premeditated murder born out of a grudge.

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FORMAGGIO

As a detective: He's one of those street-smart freelancers around town who can't resist a fun challenge when they have nothing else to do, especially if there is some tangible incentive (money or sex will get him every time). He knows a lot of ruffians about who may help him in the investigation as a favor, and gets a kick out of bullying the culprits while he figures out what authority to pawn them off on.

As a mere suspect: Unless he really liked the victim, he will not take the case seriously and may end up throwing unnecessary suspicion on himself by making tasteless jokes and sounding rather careless about it all. When his past comes under scrutiny, he will either come up perfectly harmless or having engaged in something petty that complicates the case, but had nothing to do with the actual murder.

As the culprit: He can live down a lot of things, so only monetary gain could truly induce him to take a life. He's quick and dexterous (think him tossing that tiny car into his victim's drink in the anime) and would probably add poison to the victim's drink, reasoning rightly that nobody would ever profile him as a poisoner without tangible evidence and the less he interacted with the victim, the better.

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PROSCIUTTO

As a detective: He's the classic type who needs to be propositioned and well compensated throughout, and in return he always gets clean-cut results. He'll consider the clues and employ his powers of deduction for the most part, but at critical junctures, he will expose himself to danger in the knowledge that he's perfectly capable of wrecking his opponents until they are only too glad to be arrested.

As a mere suspect: Probably the most reliable witness on the premises because he'll stick to the point and doesn't care to embellish the details, so he can come across as rather crude. He's just uncanny enough to arouse some doubt initially, but the more other people are interviewed, the more his honesty shines through. He will resent being pestered beyond the first interview, though.

As the culprit: Let's face it, he would murder for any number of reasons, personal or otherwise, and he would keep it very simple with a shot to the head. Being so thorough and technical, he could probably make even a spur of the moment crime seem premeditated, and if he were to commit a premeditated crime, chances are he would never be found out because he knows when to leave it alone.

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PESCI

As a detective: I could picture him as a low-rank police officer who goes to process the crime scene, spots something small or out of place that puzzles him but has been overlooked by others as seemingly irrelevant, and keeps dwelling on that one point until he gets the wind up the investigators and they check on his line, only to solve the case and take the credit because Pesci's too shy to step up.

As a mere suspect: One of the worst mumblers you've ever met, and the more he's questioned, the more flustered he gets until he starts misremembering details. You would have to calm him down and reassure him continuously to get the full story, but it's worth it because he's an excellent observer and tends to eschew speculation or personal opinion in favor of what he's absolutely certain of.

As the culprit: There are two ways he would commit murder - it would either have to be in the heat of the moment, half passion and half accident, or because he had been pushed beyond his limit and something finally snapped inside. He would either panic afterwards and make mistakes, or cover it up with a lot of cold common sense; whichever way it happened, he would only confess if broken down.

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GHIACCIO

As a detective: Every episode would center around his compiling a conspiracy board and ranting to himself like he's Charlie raving to Mac about Pepe Silvia. As he rants and storms we would get brief flashbacks or enactments of whatever event or connection he's dwelling on until the board was complete and the mystery solved; last scene he's beating the shit out of the perp in a parking lot.

As a mere suspect: He's incredibly high-strung and way too loud, and he goes off on such violent tangents that it's hard to keep him to the point, and even then he's too opinionated to be of any real use. He teeters between focused and accurate (if he was invested in some particular detail at the time) and completely unreliable (mostly blinded by anger or overwhelmed just trying to manage himself).

As the culprit: No premeditation about this one; it would honestly stress him too much to plan out anything. If he killed, he would lash out and keep going until he spent his wrath, and then dispose of the body as quickly as possible. He's small and vocal enough that he would probably get overlooked as someone incapable of this much brutality, surely, but his temper would eventually give him away.

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MELONE

As a detective: He's like if Jane Marple was a transmasc scene girl; he'll get involved in a murder and next thing you know he's getting his hair dyed at the local salon and getting every bit of gossip out of the suspects' weed smoking girlfriends, and then typing it all up at a café until he's satisfied in his mind about who did it and how. Will then drop some hints to whoever's in charge and go on his merry way.

As a mere suspect: He cannot stop going on tangents but in quite a different way from Ghiaccio: he usually has some interesting trivia or specialized knowledge to share, and gives the investigators plenty of food for thought. Loves to talk and can be consulted over and over, but he will get more and more abstract as time goes on and share his own theories based on blood type and horoscope, so be careful.

As the culprit: Being an invalid, he would often be treated as frail and incapable, but he has a very calculating mind and decent mobility, so if he decided to murder, he would probably stage a convincing accident to happen somewhere away from him. In a pinch he might resort to weaponizing his medication as poison, hoping that suspicion would fall on someone else with knowledge and access.

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ILLUSO

As a detective: I could see him as an accidental detective/informant - he's nosy and loves to dig up dirt on people, but sometimes this leads to his uncovering something that should have been left well alone, and then he has no choice but to quickly pass all his material over to some competent authority before anyone might come after his snooping ass. Justice is honestly an afterthought for him.

As a mere suspect: He's always pegged as a shady character and rightfully so, but he is surprised and offended every single time it happens. He's somewhat defensive, especially when he gets nervous, but where he feels safe, he will unload a lot of sordid details about the victim and everyone else involved, and insinuates as much as he can. Will then make the investigators swear they didn't hear it from him.

As the culprit: He would prefer to premeditate, not only to indulge in the fantasy of retribution and his own cleverness, but also because it seems safer to have a plan of action. He might stage an accident on the spot and then give a sob story when interrogated, or go with a good old fashioned overdose of whatever, but if he were cornered, he would strike impulsively out of fear, not caring what method he used.

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SORBET

As a detective: This one is a slow and quiet thinker. He will take a gander at the crime scene and address questions to those involved, but seems to involve himself as little as possible on the whole, and thus ends up surprising everyone when he finally divulges his plausible theories and more than plausible solutions, mostly based on first impression, psychology, and focusing on the money motive.

As a mere suspect: He's balefully apathetic and uncooperative, always asking if he could go now, and often insists of having seen and head nothing. Underneath it all, he's either neutral or contemptuous of those involved, or deeply attached to the culprit and boldly, if placidly, covering for them every step of the way. Has very little regard for human life and infinite regard for an inheritance.

As the culprit: One of the few who would have no qualms about choking their victim with their bare hands, and it's always about money one way or another. He would make a very thorough clean-up and face the interrogation in his usual manner, possibly laying the apathy on even thicker than usual. You could only get him with damning evidence, and even then he would never own to it.

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GELATO

As a detective: He would be such a jolly fella, just a funny little guy grinning widely and asking the most uncanny questions, and tapping you on the arm as he made a joke about hanging you based on what you had just told him about your relationship to the victim. Will casually hound the suspect all friendly like, and then cook their goose at the public barbecue for the entire world to marvel at the roast.

As a mere suspect: His degree of familiarity with the authorities would be quite jarring, and he would keep asking questions instead of answering them, not even for the sake of evasion but because he's excited about the crime and wants to hear what the sleuths think. He will appear to know too much without actually knowing anything, and let's face it, he'd probably be the second person to die because of it.

As the culprit: He will do nothing by halves, and if he wants to commit murder, then by damn it will be a freak show with weird props and arson and plenty of red herrings scattered about to keep the investigators on their toes. He would never get away with it simply because everyone's testimonies would line up about what a lethal trickster he is, but he would go down as a sensation and love it.

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Wee guy got fucking vaporised. Who cares

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the city where we live doesn't allow public barbecues so my brother fucking welded a grill to a handcart and now hosts "chill and grill sessions" where he sends all his friends his live location so they can hunt him down on their bikes with sausages in their backpacks while he carts it around evading the police like some sort of barbecue vigilante, grilling on the run. i have never been prouder of him

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self-care phrases to boost your confidence

this shit ain't nothin to me man

I'll fucking kill you

.

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friendly reminder that a translation for the melone/ghiaccio story is out

https://www.tumblr.com/kersplinky88/737284557440794624/no-love-like-a-parents

Thank you, Anon! Hopefully I can take a peek between the holidays!

Hope you don't mind me also using this post to let everyone know I'm alive, things have just been insanely busy lately - I was busy with my book and then I got unexpected work and now we're also all sick as the holidays draw near, so sadly there has been no time for me to do anything for this blog (though I think of the boys on an off because I miss them). Hope you all are doing well, and I'm wishing you a lovely rest of the year!

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“Hello,” she said in a voice so husky it could pull a dogsled.

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ghiaccio and melone are getting a short story in december! what are your thoughts ?

i am excited, if the characterization is good i will be happy, if i dont like it or agree its not written by araki so it will be ok

Oh wow, I am really out of the loop! Thank you for letting me know!

My honest thoughts are 1) good for them, 2) hopefully an amazing win for Melone fans because they have been through a lot in fandom. I'm pretty much the same as you on stuff like this: if the characterization is good it will add to the repertoire whenever I get to it, and if I don't like it or don't agree with it then I will just ignore it. I'm slow as it is to get to new or side material - I still haven't touched Purple Haze Feedback and I probably never will because everything I heard about it just made me sort of shrug? Glad for everyone who enjoyed it all the same, having more stuff to enjoy is a good thing!

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one time in trader joes I saw a deathknight wither a nectarine to straight up mildew and ash in their hands and then put it right back on the display

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THESE ARE SO GOOD, THANK YOU!!! I just saw them and I am delighted!!!

similarly to the httyd ask, what would la squadra look like AS dragons?

Risotto: "Black Barrage". Larger and more robust than the average dragon, with a large frill extending over the neck and lined with small horns. He has two layers of continuously growing black scales, which he normally sheds by rubbing against mountain rocks (he feasts on ore deposits), but when threatened, he can flex his dermis and launch his scales with the power and precision of an archer firing a crossbow. The scales are sharp, durable and surprisingly light, so smiths are eager to scavenge them for weapons and armor.

Formaggio: "Bluffrill". It took a while to figure out that he is not actually an average size dragon but a rather small lizard dragon with frills in strategic places on his body, which he can unfold and fan out to appear larger and more threatening. He's red with a yellow spotted pattern to aid his bluff as a dangerous beast, but should this not be enough, he has a single long talon on each wing that he can use to slice and dice his foes. He often chews on pebbles and stores them in his cheeks so he can spit them back out as small wads of magma.

Prosciutto: "Plague Song". A shimmering black with yellow accents, he has a long serpentine form suspended in the air by enormous wings. If his surroundings reach a high enough temperature either due to the climate or the area being on fire, the heat will react with the iridescent film coating his body to unleash a toxic smog that can decompose anything organic. The hotter the air and the stronger its currents, the wider his range becomes. He is not able to start the fire himself, but his singing may attract someone who can.

Pesci: "Hook Snagger". He is grass green with a large, chunky lower body and a thick long neck that can move in any direction. Some people think he earned his name due to his hooked claws as well as the single hooked horn protruding from his chin, all of which are fierce weapons in their own right, but his scariest weapon is actually his absurdly long whip-like tongue, which is so pointed and fast that he can use it as a harpoon to impale his targets, which he then reels in and swallows whole. Lives near water and fishes all day long.

Ghiaccio: "Chillburst". He is below average size and best resembles a white, tailless armadillo with several bands of hard but flexible armor plates covering his body. He is flightless, but he scuttles very fast on his short and powerful clawed legs, and by inflating a sac in his lower body and releasing the air in a concentrated burst strong enough to stun an ox, he can either propel himself forward or launch himself into the air at an angle. He has an extremely cold breath that can freeze magma. Resembles a snow hut when he's curled up.

Melone: "Prybaby". So named because he's very inquisitive to the point of being obtrusive, but always shies away from putting himself at actual risk. He's a rather small dark gray lizard dragon with a bioluminescent purple ring pattern that glows in the dark. He has a very modest fire breath, but more notably, the smoke he exhales is an oddly pleasant hallucinogen, which often makes those whose homes he invades inclined to let him stay there. In exchange for his smoke, he gets to partake in his hosts' food and poke around in safety.

Illuso: "Glimmerglam". His large but slim build and vast wingspan are very aesthetically pleasing, though nobody seems to agree on what color he actually is, and with reason: his scales are not merely reflective, but depending on the level of tension built up in his dermis, the scales can rotate, catching light at different angles to produce a variety of hues and even optical illusions. For this reason he prefers to live in caves and other natural mazes, where he can use this ability to lead his unsuspecting prey into a dead end...

Sorbet: "Savage Mulcher". A ground dweller who loves lush meadows and thick forests, but where nature is not so kind, he will make do and use his shovel-like appendages to turn the earth and eat the soil as well as anything that grows in it. He cannot breathe fire, but his insides can heat up to such temperatures that tree stumps turn to crumbling ash as he chews them, which is how he is able to turn what he eats into a rich compost on par with volcanic ash. Becomes extremely territorial once he establishes his own luxurious grove.

Gelato: "Spinning Menace". At first sight he's an average sized lizard dragon and an unassuming ocher color. He has functional wings, but his favorite mode of transportation is rolling into a ball, biting onto his tail, and rolling on the thick, squarish scaling all over his body. As he does this, his body heats up along with any debris caught in his scales, which then shoots out in all directions as flaming shrapnel. He's a highly social creature, which means that he either shows up in towns to chase people or with other dragons at skirmishes.