sophhenc

[sophhenc]

I visited Mrs. Halinka and I washed her curtains. We talked and ate some cake.

The weather was gloomy and that made Halinka sad that day. She asked me to help her wash the curtains so I took them off and put into the washing machine. She added some powder and we waited. She was surprised that I could hold my hands up for so long which to me wasn’t anything complicated. We noticed that too much foam has been created and Halinka started blaming herself for adding too much powder. I consoled her saying that the machine will work it out and it indeed did. Then I hung the curtains up and we talked about her war memories and the present state of Poland.

[sophhenc]

Tennis… after 3 weeks. We practiced and even played a match! We mainly worked on rotation.

Ouhhhh that was rough at first but it got better as we progressed with the training. At the beginning I missed the ball often or played it into the net. Not succeeding aggravated me and I sort of lost hope. But then I saw that my ball had rotation which was relieving. Serving wasn’t great as always but whatever. Also todays training was intense as we had to jump and run a lot which made me even lose my breath.

[sophhenc]

I grabbed my camera and did some photography in Italy.

The atmosphere was calm and mystical due to the fog. Although my parents and friends wished it wa sunny, I was amazed by the conditions. I’ve always wanted to experience an eerie winter where only trees contrast the white color of the snow. I tried to capture different shots, some more geometric some blurry all depending on the content. I was quite proud of these because they match my sense of aesthetic perfectly.

[sophhenc]

I played tennis after a longer period of time. We did the usual exercises.

My brother wasn’t there and so I had a whole training to myself and to my surprise it went really well. My forehand is getting more and more proper. I was able to serve normally and play a short match. I think it’s due to the decreased pressure I feel when my brothers not present. Even when the coach jokingly told the other coach to look at my serves I wasn’t bothered and did as I should. That gave me some tennis confidence.

[sophhenc]

I visited Mrs. Halina after a long time, I went and grabbed some groceries for her, took off the curtains and hanged new ones. I prepared coffee and tea, then we talked.

Her health is getting worse and it’s difficult because lying about how it’s will get better is out question because it simply won’t happen. Her life is solely concerned with existing, not living. Moving around the house has become very tiring and hurtful due to arthritis. After I changed the curtains she told me to rest, when for me it wasn’t a challenge at all. She told me about her blood pressure issues and how paramedics had to help her several times. She also has terrifying dreams that increase her blood pressure and cause fear. She sees the dead and other things she doesn’t want to share. That’s terrible fate but I think the war left her signs in the mind and the body.

[sophhenc]

I decorated Christmas cookies using different sprinkles.

Even though I bake these cookies every year, I’ve never decorated them because it demands a lot of time. This year I had some to spare and decided to try. I started by sprinkling the decorations on top of the cookie already covered by sugar paste but it made huge mess and the sprinkles wouldn’t stick. So I came up with an idea to have my sprinkles in a small plastic box and then dip the cookies in them and press so that it sticks. This was successful and I managed to decorate my cookies. But it was time consuming and energy consuming because actually covering the cookies with the sugar paste “pisaczki”, how strange it may sound, demanded hand strength. And then the other more intricate decorations also needed precision and patience…

[sophhenc]

Today was tough but so rewarding because I had the chance to really learn a proper forehand with rotation. And my mom and I even played a short match.

We started from the beginning and the coach explained what makes a good forehand which is strength, placement and rotation. And I lacked the latter. He pointed out to which point I need to exert control over the racket and when to leave it. He also talked about the importance of the whole body rotation which adds strength to the ball. I was a little bit ashamed at first for my poor technique but I learned fast and my forehand had never been better. I would rarely hear the pure sound the racket makes what it hits the ball perfectly and then I heard it every time… One thing that was less positive is my asthma which made me suffocate a little bit but I managed of course.

[sophhenc]

CAS PROJECT! Finally… we renovated the wall on the 2nd floor of our school by ameliorating the mural which had already been there and was in a bad condition. We had to peel the parts of the old paint which weren’t sticking to the wall and then we painted over the lines and added many new ones. After that we did some shading and ultimately we painted the circles of various colours and sizes.

We have heard from fellow students that this wall was unpleasing to look at and was in need of rejuvenation. We thought so too, so to make our space more comfortable, we decided to make it more friendly? Scraping the old paint was tedious because most of it was of no use. Then it turned out that our black paint differs slightly from what was painted there originally and that’s why we had to go over almost the entirety of the old design. After, we started to proceed with our idea for the wall and used tape to create the new lines which at the beginning were coming out quite wobbly but then we got hang of it and they were perfectly clean. We obviously made some mistakes and did not follow the original plan such as the placement of the circles or the lines under the “wing” building, but we figured that it tournée out for the better because the mural gained a soul as it became more interesting. Apart from drawing straight lines, we decided to use some strokes of a paintbrush to give it dimension or add shading to some buildings. We also added some sprouts on them to picture an eco friendly Warsaw. Then for the circles we used paint can covers to draw circles and filled it in with different coloured paints which wasn’t easy for the ones placed high on the wall because a straightened arm doesn’t have this much control over its movement. But we managed, even if we argued about the placement of the circles and their colours, it turned out great. What’s ironic is the fact that we had the most issues with were our signatures because it turned out that painting small letters with a paintbrush makes them wobbly and generally not too pretty. However, we were extremely proud to have managed to arrange this project and to finalise it, leaving something for the school.

[sophhenc]

TENNIS AGAIN but after a month… I almost had to figure out again how to hold the racket. But we practiced long distance playing and then met with my mom and played a tennis game called “jedna”.

Oh… that was rough at the beginning because my muscle memory had deteriorated but I quite quickly caught up and started actually catching the serves. It wasn’t amazing but at least I knew I could still do it. However, my forehand let me down because it’s terrible as I lack the “spin” aspect of it. It is when the ball rotates in the forward direction. So my forehands land way too far away. Me and my “team mate” have won the game but mostly because he is my coach. Even though I complained it was entertaining how we had to switch our focus so frequently. After the match, my brother and I got club hoodies. It was very nice of them:)

[sophhenc]

I painted for a while and came up with this piece of a dragon on a red background.

Im not a painter by any means, I usually don’t paint, because I’m not good at it but this time out of boredom I took acrylic paints and started sketching. A dragons head emerged from these doodles and then I continued with the idea. It isn’t too big of a painting nor too detailed but I like it. The contrast of colours makes it interesting, the bright red catches attention. It was calming to paint in silence, far from the city.

[sophhenc]

I baked soft cookies with frosting. They were delicious.

Even though I hate cooking, making these cookies is somewhat pleasurable when you have all the ingredients pre prepared. You also think about how they will turn out and it keeps it going. My friend assisted me, mainly by talking, but obviously I don’t mind, the atmosphere was cheerful. He added too much butter to the frosting and I was afraid it would come out disgusting but in the end it tasted amazing.

[sophhenc]

I played tennis and practiced all of it’s techniques.

I was terrible this time. Maybe out of fatigue. After all tennis at 8 am on a Saturday is a bit cruel. I didn’t have physical energy to hit the ball with a racket with enough force. My forehands lacked a top spin of course and even my backhands were mediocre. I just wanted to come back home. I constantly directed the ball into the net. I don’t know what that was…

[sophhenc]

I visited Mrs. Halinka, we talked, I went to get some groceries for her, we ate a “wieniec” cake and discussed global issues.

It’s still hurtful to see how she struggles due to her health. She can barely walk, her hands are shakey, she has incredible pains in her stomach and much more… Me going to a grocery store and buying a few things is a revelation. She always asks me if I’m tired when for me it’s a normal walk. She tells me she’d want to die and I honestly don’t know what to answer with. I usually say with irony that there will be time for death which is not now. She also misses her husband and she even tried to find some pieces for me to play on violin but unfortunately she gave them away after he died. As she cannot go outside, she usually watches tv republika all day which spreads misinformation. That’s why I try to talk to her and show new, realistic perspectives. She’s not stupid, she has some critiques towards that tv station but she’s simply surrounded by it.

[sophhenc]

I visited Mrs. Halinka today. We talked and I went to get some groceries for her.

We haven’t seen each other for a couple of months. It was heartbreaking to see how she has suffered through the summer season. She was confined in her apartment the whole time because she’s not able to walk much. She struggles with many things and it hurts to hear that she wishes to die. In those moments I have no idea how to respond. It’s so strange to see the contrast between me who’s starting in life and has trivial issues (one would say) and Mrs. Halinka who’s at the end of her life and awaits death… It alters my understanding of life.

[sophhenc]

I played tennis and padel. I mostly practiced forehand but we also played a “match” - long distance bounces. As of padel, I practiced volley and general bounces.

It was a chill training. I wasn’t so focused on getting everything right and I feel like it made my game better. I talked while playing which made me more relaxed. I didn’t pay attention to failed bounces because I didn’t feel judged or nervous. It was fun to just train and not care about the outcome.

[sophhenc]

I baked soft cookies inspired by the cinnamon crumbl cookie.

I had two attempts as I miscalculated the amount of butter for the first time. However, I was fond of myself of not losing my temper and reacting calmly. I acknowledged what had happened without judgment. It took me a long time to make the dough and then the frosting but it was worth it. They were so big and filling that we ate them the whole week. But they were exactly what I dreamed of and couldn’t buy. So I made my own.

[sophhenc]

I created a chic makeup look using black eye pencil, grey shadow and shimmer and a cool nude lip combo on the lips.

It was rather spontaneous as I sat by my vanity and started playing with my makeup. I started with smudging the eye pencil and then decided to add some shimmer. To complete the look I did my base and decided to add faux beauty marks to make the look more dramatic. I’m particularly pleased with the lips as I managed to obtain a cool toned nude color which isn’t that easy. Overall, I let my creativity guide me and my mom said that it was the most beautiful makeup she has seen me in.