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Wicked Fiyeraba Headcannons:

-Fiyero def sits on Elphaba’s lap

- they call each other Yero and Fae; after the Wicked Witch persona dies, they only go by Yero and Fae so less people will be able to tie them to the dead witch and the missing prince.

- one of Fiyero’s favorite activities is to have Elphaba read to him. He finds it very relaxing, and informative. (Fiyero has dyslexia and that why he doesn’t like reading himself- but dyslexia isn’t a diagnosis in Oz, it hasn’t been recogized)

- they take care of young orphaned Animals, and Fiyero got Elphaba an egg apron so she could put all the kittens/small Animals in the pockets while she was caretaking

- Fiyero likes to draw…he draws a lot of Elphaba (and the Animals, but mostly Elphaba)

- Fiyero likes to purchase Vinkun silk scarves for Elphaba. She uses some for practical embellments in her clothing- like as a belt, shawl or hair covering. Others she keeps as house clothes- like as a night shawl. There’s one though- black with red roses- that is only used during intimacy with Fiyero.

- Elphaba and Fiyero have really complex feelings about Glinda…she was Elphaba’s close and only friend for a while, but Fiyero helped Elphaba realize that Glinda treated her like crap (this is apart from not making the sacrifices to leave with Elphaba). Elphaba also had some romantic feelings towards Glinda, and does not know what to do with those feelings. Fiyero loved Glinda, but wasn’t in love with her. He is highly aware of her faults, but still misses her and feels bad for what happened. Both realize that Glinda was manipulated by the Wizard and Madam Morrible, but both also realize that only Glinda is responsible for Glinda’s actions. And can they forgive her for being an anti-Animal/Anti-Witch propaganda machine? For helping in orchestrating Nessa’s death, and creating a trap for Elphaba? They don’t know. Together, Elphaba and Fiyero write letters to Glinda that are then burned before being sent, allowing them to work through all of these feelings and trauma they have in relation to Glinda.

- Fiyero’s favorite thing todo to annoy Elphaba is to use her butt as a pillow. Elphaba hates it (but will tolerate it) and Fiyero loves it.

-Elphaba is very passionate about a lot of stuff, and has a habit of information dumping, even when it’s considered rude. Fiyero likes it, but has felt the need to coach Elphaba for when the time is appropriate to do so, after she accidentally offended Fiyero’s mother.

- Fiyero and Elphaba do the whole “3 taps means I Love You” thing

-Fiyero likes to comb/take care of Elphaba’s hair

- Fiyero is an addict, he got addicted to a ❄️-like ozian drug while in his rebellion/coping-with-being-royalty phase. He hasn’t always been completely honest with Elphaba about it, but he got clean when he joined the Gale Force. He still had carvings, especially with his chronic pain and stress, and he tries to be as honest as possible with Elphaba about his cravings. They both use 🍃 to deal with chronic pain and stress though, but in moderate amounts.

- After being tortured by the Gale Force- Fiyero develops Narceolpsey. It’s a learning curve for both him and Elphaba.

-Elphaba offered Fiyero an open relationship (not because she wanted one but because she thought he would be unhappy with just her, and the novelty would wear off). Fiyero refused (while he had been poly in the past, he refused because he knew Elphaba’s reasonings were based in her feeling inadequate and self conscious).

Hmm I’ll think of more

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Ough Wicked movie really opened up old childhood obsessions

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continuing with the wicked hot takes no one asked for: if either of the girls made the opposite decision in defying gravity (i.e., elphaba stays or glinda goes), they would basically become fiyero. elphaba would become a decorated part of the wizard's government, and she would hate it and be bad at it; glinda would have several heart attacks just trying to make sure she kept her mouth shut. and eventually elphie would decide "fuck it" and do something stupid and heroic anyway.

meanwhile glinda would become elphaba's loyal companion on the run, pragmatic and dedicated to her safety, but in all actuality somewhat useless. and eventually she would get in over her head doing something stupid and heroic and elphie would also have to do something stupid and heroic about it. see? fiyero.

this is what i mean when i say all three characters are on the same narrative path at different stages. i mean, would i kill to see glinda go with elphaba (partially for the very real love they share, partially to see how it would fuck them both up?) yes, of course! but narratively the answer to the what-if is fiyero.

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It’s hilarious to think of the two happening at the same time

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slight au where elphie accepted fiyero's offer of a ride home when they met in the woods. bc at that point, elphie's still the least popular student at shiz, and fiyero is the mysterious and eligible prince charming everyone's dying to meet. so imagine when he rolls up with elphaba, who met him before anyone else did and they're talking and he appears to be enjoying himself? people at shiz would lose their minds

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scene in wicked pt 2 where dorothy learns the wizard is full of shit, then flashes back to when she saw wizomania when she first got to the emerald city like 4 days ago and she saw a hologram of this man chanting "OMAHA.... OMAHAAAAAAA...." and she's like "wait one fuCKING SECOND, NOT ONLY ARE YOU NOT A WIZARD YOU'RE FROM GODDAMN NEBRASKA?!" and fiyero, brr, and boq have to stop her from tackling him

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part of why i hope wicked pt 2 shows us more of dorothy's story and how it changes in the wicked canon is because i just think Jonathan Bailey would be an absolute delight as the scarecrow

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ngl my favorite thing about Fiyero is that he basically becomes a male damsel in distress and so deathly close to being a fridged wife for BOTH Elphaba and Glinda (and functionally is one until the finale) and but he still nonetheless goes through a pretty compelling character arc in his own right and serves as a foil to both girls.

the movie making him explicitly queer was a bonus.

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Blind people must save a lot on electricity.

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“Not Sorry for Loving You” from EPIC: the Musical is the perfect Nessarose Thropp song, in this essay I will—

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Anyway, after watching the Wicked movie again, I think my ideal outcome of the love triangle in a canon divergence scenario is "Gelphie and their free-range boytoy Fiyero who comes and goes as he pleases."

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Gelphie, Fiyeraba or both

both!! i love doomed yuri and social justice/eats grass power couples and true love triangles

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who’s ready to talk about how wicked is one of the few examples of a love triangle that is actually a triangle

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stuff they actually let happen on Star Wars: The Clone Wars

Godzilla tried to eat Chancellor Palpatine

Darth Maul came back from the dead as a crime boss with robot legs and had a giant angry brother named Savage

Jabba the Hutt’s uncle was an offensive gay stereotype

Palpatine had a gigantic forehead for literally no reason

Zombie episode

They named a Jedi “I’m Gonna Die” and then killed him

Some senator had a sex robot

All the Twi’leks had French accents

Ahsoka got hunted for sport

Anakin had to do elaborate BDSM roleplay with an evil cat lady

Dooku was almost murdered by the Macbeth witches

Hondo Ohnaka

Yoda made contact with Qui-Gon Jinn’s ghost but the other Jedi just thought he had dementia

0.07 seconds after leaving the Jedi Order, Ahsoka crashed her motorcycle, got a girlfriend, and ended up smuggling drugs for the mob

Anakin and Obi-Wan met the physical incarnations of the Dark and Light Sides of the Force and they looked like a goth drama queen and his cottagecore sister and both of them were furries

Ahsoka got bit by an evil rat which made her evil for awhile

Jar Jar killed a guy

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when the fic is so good you need to exit out of the browser app and scroll on tumblr for a few minutes to process what you’re reading

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Do you guys think when Fiyero told Elphaba he ate grass as a child, he was saying that to make light out of the awkward situation they were in or did he actually eat grass because honestly I can believe both.