sly-punk1712
Structured Madness
649 posts
She/her, Bisexual, Muscian and Writer. I love to hear from you! my ask is always open! 
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sly-punk1712 · 3 months ago
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sly-punk1712 · 3 months ago
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sly-punk1712 · 3 months ago
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sly-punk1712 · 3 months ago
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Every single one of your actions suddenly becomes epic when you listen to this
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I play this in my car while I’m driving.
I’m getting married and walking down the aisle to this song
I decided this a long time ago
Try petting the cats to this.
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sly-punk1712 · 5 years ago
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Reblog this picture of me holding a Family Size box of Honey Nut Cheerios? I’d really appreciate it.
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sly-punk1712 · 6 years ago
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Me and ifmusicislovebabyplayon
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sly-punk1712 · 6 years ago
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sly-punk1712 · 6 years ago
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also while we’re talking about nanaimo, a 17 year old indigenous girl went missing from the city yesterday. please also bring attention to that so we can get her home safely.
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sly-punk1712 · 6 years ago
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my granddad just called me to tell me how big his cauliflowers are growing and it was so cute theyre “TWICE as big as the ones you get in the shop”
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sly-punk1712 · 6 years ago
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IT’S TIME FOR ANOTHER PATREON ZINE
full color, fifteen pages, and a bunch of heroes who have been forcibly removed from their respective teams. enjoy!
LINK HERE
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sly-punk1712 · 6 years ago
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Reblog if you want a terrible, 3 sentence fan fiction in your ask, based on your url
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sly-punk1712 · 6 years ago
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reblog if you’re NOT tumblr famous, but you ARE tired and kinda gay
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sly-punk1712 · 7 years ago
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Good morning, Who are we cancelling today?
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sly-punk1712 · 7 years ago
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ao3: and they were roommates me, opening the fic up: Oh My God They Were Roommates
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sly-punk1712 · 7 years ago
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For our paper anniversary I subscribed us to playboy. 
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sly-punk1712 · 7 years ago
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A/N: Barton/Johnson/Coulson sorry not sorry. A smidgen sorry I can’t believe I wrote this. Light mentions of violence, explicit content and vocabulary, kind of objectifying but everyone like it. Jealousy. 
Hope you like it.
She was going to be honest, she kinda wished their had been hostages behind Hydra door number 1. Well other hostages. Okay fine that’s probably wrong. She wishes it had been anyone but him. 
They had kicked down the door and were almost finished with the first sweep when Coulson froze beside her. She turned to check in and followed his eyes. On the far way dozing in and out of consciousness was a man chained to the ceiling. 
“Clint?!” Coulson lowered his firearm and rushed forward. The man’s head snapped up and they eye not swollen shut widened before he grinned. 
“Bozz!!” He slurred. “I’m so glad you're here.” He sank against the cuffs toward Coulson’s open arms. 
“Daisy the chains!” He ordered arms coming up to support the man. Daisy’s not distracted by the flexing of his arms. That’s unprofessional.
 “Of course I’m here. I told you I’d always come for you.” Coulson stroked the other man’s hair shakily. Daisy broke the chains and held up her hand to study her partner. Coulson’s shoulder rocked into her hand before he found his weight and moved away. 
“I’m so glad to see you Phil.” 
‘Phil’ rang in her ears and Daisy’s vision filled with red. She nodded to Coulson and the other agents to get the man, Clint, to med bay. She cracked her knuckles irritated at the feelings inside her. Unprofessional as can be.
When she finished with the base there were no more doors for Hydra to hide behind. 
She was the last one aboard the quinjet, brushing rubble from her shoulders. Their prize was leaning against Coulson ice pack over his face and water in hand.
“Damn guurll” He beamed. Coulson gave a short bark of laughter. Jealousy spiked in her again and she wished there were more goons to bash. The ground shook slightly as they took off. May gave her an odd look but Daisy focused on her own water ignoring everyone around her. SO professional. 
********************************
Turns out he’s some old SHIELD asset that Coulson used to handle. That doesn’t make her feel better. Thinking about Coulson handling Barton’s thick assets. His arms are huge and this thighs are just a thick. It’s disgusting. He’s gorgeous and his ass is tight as sin. I’d handle that till my dying day. If what they say is true there’s no way Coulson would be interested in her assets. Superpowers only turn Coulson on when they belong to Captain America. Daisy shakes her head because that’s unkind to both men. 
“Hey, Shaker Girl right?” The sound of his voice gives her pause but she wishes she could have Gordon’s powers instead. Anywhere but here, anywhere but beside Coulson’s pet agent.
“Daisy” She corrects turning to look at him. His face looks much better, the swelling gone down and his cuts cleaned. He’s even handsome bruised. Disgusting. 
“What’s the face?” He sprawls down in a rolling chair really not designed for sprawling. The arms creak under the weight of his thighs. He tilts his head with a small smile. “Ah. So it’s like that?” 
His tone irritates Daisy. Everything about him irritates her. It’s totally irrational, she’s heard stories of him. He sounds fun. Someone Skye would have loved. Someone Daisy could easily love if she wasn’t already in love.
“Like what?” She sighs exasperatedly. Clint’s eyebrows raise. “Listen Barton I’m glad you're safe but if you don’t have anything to say I really should be going.” She stands and faster than she can blink so does he. He’s too close. He smells like salt and Coulson. Like warmth and something spicy. He’s too close and her mouth is very dry.
“Have dinner with me.” One moment ago he was like a schoolboy and now he’s breathing hot against her ear, husky and ragged. Daisy doesn’t pull away she’s not afraid of him, instead she looks up questioningly angling her face toward his. They could kiss so easily. They are really too close. But if what they says has any merit at all she doesn’t want to risk hurting Coulson. Barton’s pretty face has nothing on the sad eyes Coulson makes. 
“Hmmm” She meant it to be a contemplative sounds but it’s closer to a moan. “No” She breathes out and slides sideways out of his reach toward the door.
“Really?! I thought I had that one. That’s the Barton’s so damn cute face right?” He’s back to cute boy. For someone who took a huge beating the last few days he looks very innocent. She bets that does it for Coulson. Huge innocent eyes, Huge manly abs. It does it for her.
“It was. Those thighs” She shakes her head on the way out the door. For whatever reason that makes Barton crack up and she leaves with a small smile of her own. Anyone who can laugh that much is probably better for Coulson anyway.
“Hey Daisy have you seen Clint?” Speak of the devil and he shall walk out of his office looking utterly kissable in those jeans. 
“Can’t stop seeing him” She mutters gesturing to the room she’d just come from. 
“What does that mean?” Coulson calls after her. Daisy ignores him and wishes Clint was easier to dislike.
******************************************
“Why don’t you like him? I mean I know why I don’t like him but he’s your type” May talks more while throwing her around the training room than any other time. Like,borderline won’t shut up, talks.
“My type?” Daisy huffs dodging a fist. “First off, I don’t have a type.” She hits the mat to avoid a kick and rolls quickly to avoid the second. “and second, Barton is the most annoying thing to happen to SHIELD. Including Talbot, Hunter and Thurston!” Daisy grunts and scrambles to get up. 
“He’s not that bad” May almost laughs. Well laughs for May, she’s clearly amused. It’s a good distraction and Daisy makes to grab her for a throw. It’s not good enough May swats away her hands and flicks her ear in the process. 
“He is!! He’s a public menace, he cut all the chords in the entertainment room when he couldn’t untangle them, I’m still finding nerf darts in the lab from his game, all of the air chairs have these thigh marks” It’s probably the exact confirmation May is looking for but she can’t get over it. Who’s thighs leave marks like that? “like he’s physically incapable of closing his damn legs!” She can’t do much more than block May’s blows while ranting. 
“He used to be worse” May shrugs. “You’d like him more if he wasn’t taking up so much of Coulson’s time.” May suggests with a knowing look. Daisy glowers. She hates that May was the one to figure out her feelings. May knew Daisy liked Coulson before Daisy did. Before Skye did. 
“Maybe if Coulson could climb out of his ass for a few days he’d tell Barton to stop being such an unholy terror.” She gets tossed to the mats again and lays there a moment resigned, and sweaty. 
“Don’t be stupid Shakes, I’m the one in his ass” Daisy scrambles up defensively looking around for him. He’s nowhere visible. A Nerf dart smacks into her shoulder. Above her? He’s in an air vent? 
“Just calling it how it is” He’s so fucking smug. 
May doesn’t tell her off for shaking the base but Coulson does come looking for her later to ask about Barton’s new bruises. She’s not sorry... She’s a little sorry.
**************************
Clint has been here almost a month now and Daisy’s problem has shifted significantly. After the encounter in the gym Clint stopped bothering her so much. He’s downright respectful, opens doors says things like yes ma’am on missions. Cooking exotic dinner for the team and cracking jokes when he’s not on assignment. He’s so charming, he even convinces Hunter to do inventory without complaining. He’s the perfect agent, a good fit for the team. 
However with her he’s still polite and distant. Holing up with Coulson in his office. That possibly the worst part because then she can’t hang out with Coulson and she has to wonder is he’s parked that round ass in her chair. Disgusting.
She’d gone to see about inviting Coulson to dinner when it happens. She’d barged into his office without knocking. Both men jump apart but it was too late she’d seen what she seen. Boy did she hate being right. Clint sitting in what used to be her chair, thick thighs spread invitingly. Coulson perched on them, the way she wishes she could, his hips rocking greedily and devouring the sniper’s mouth in a hot kiss. 
“Daisy!?!” Coulson flushes a deep red. Clint however doesn’t move just lets his head roll back, on her chair. He doesn’t move to hide his erection, unlike Coulson who moves behind his desk discreetly. Not that she hadn’t been picturing them like this since they came home from that now hole in the ground Hydra base but seeing it was something else. A new heat rushed thru her veins. The same heat she’d felt on the first day she’d met him when he’d said “Phil.” so easily.  Only now she knows what this is. Jealousy, red hot piping jealousy. And worse it’s not just for Coulson who’s she had feelings for for some time now. Its for both of them. Coulson and his kind laugh and dirty smirks, Clint and his sinful body and goofy jokes. 
Well shit. Her heart is pounding in her ears and her mouth’s dry one again. 
“Daisy? ” Clint’s voice is what startles her. “Are you okay?” His eyes are such a beautiful sight and she shakes her head once. 
“What’s wrong Daisy?” Coulson steps forward reaching for her tentatively. Daisy draws back slightly and his hand falls back beside him. All these feeling are making her a little dizzy. There is so much movement in this room. If their vibrations weren’t enough her own body is putting off twice the emotion it normally does.
“Jealous” She finally manages to shake out. Her voice is a lot huskier than she meant it to be. She looks at Clint because she can’t bear to see Coulson. If Clint says no it’s nothing. He’s annoying. a bother really. If Coulson says no, her life might be over. and she wishes she was being dramatic.
 Clint’s pupils are blown wide and he looks hopeful. Daisy can’t bear hoping herself. She’s still firmly ignoring Coulson.
“Of?” He challenges. It’s too late now she’s said it might as well run with it. Worst thing that can happen is they say no and she and Hunter get drunk to high heaven before she leaves this base for life as a nun or one of those mountain-top gurus.
“Both of you” She says raggedly and finally looks to Coulson. He’s got a look she’s never seen and she shifts uncertainly. “Just Jealous. I’m fine” She shakes her head. Coulson reaches for her again hand hovering over the skin on her arm. Goose-pimples raise on her arms and her nipples tighten and her breath hitches. Coulson relaxes and finally pulls her to him.
“Oh God Daisy I thought I was going crazy.” He groans wrapping her in his arms. He’s so warm and perfect and she clings to him just in case he changes his mind. “I’ve been dreaming of this since the first ride.” He confesses pulling back slightly. Daisy’s eyebrows furrow in confusion. Ride? in Lola? dreaming of what? He crushes his mouth to hers and her mind goes blank. It’s so fucking good. So much better than she’d hoped and she melts into his arms counting on him to keep her up. Coulson rests their weight against his desk shifting her to stand between his legs. 
They finally come up for air both gasping and not moving far. 
“Not crazy.” She mutters pressing kisses to his face. “God then then HE came!” Daisy gestures to Clint burrowing further into Coulson’s collar. 
“Yea?” and Clint’s left her chair he’s right behind them pressed against her pulling her hair to the side to find skin to kiss. 
“And He’s so pretty Coulson and my chair! Those fucking thighs Coulson I’m only human” She groans fingers tightening in Coulson’s shirt. He chuckles rearranging his arms tighter.  Clint’s lips ghost over her shoulders up her neck.
“Only Inhuman” Clint laughs. Daisy turns around in Coulson’s arms still leaning on him and fists her hands under Clint’s sleeveless shirt pulling his mouth to hers. She devours him swaying back into Coulson with the force of it. Clint’s taller than her., so is Coulson for that matter, so she almost has to lean back onto Coulson to keep her balance while Clint kisses the life out of her.  She nips at his lower lip growling slightly. Behind her Coulson groans and tugs at her to turn around again. Daisy lets herself be passed back for more hot kisses. 
“Please I..” She finally gasps one hand reaching for Clint the other playing with Coulson’s hair. Daisy’s pretty sure he’s only looked like this in her fantasies. His mouth is a dark red, kiss bruised, his eyes half lidded and his cheeks flushed. She doesn’t have a good look at Clint but she can feel his interest pressing against her ass. “Please Phil...” It’s her turn to say it and Daisy wishes she could have recorded the groan he made. 
“Yes.” He nods quickly. “Yes, Whatever you want” His fingers begin to fumble with the top button on his shirt and he exchanges a look with Clint. Daisy’s brain is overdrive. Coulson’s fingers are racing to get him free of his shirt, Clint’s are creeping up under her shirt tugging it gently upward. Yes!!
When her hands come back down free of her shirt, she crowds them on either side of Coulson, pressing him into the desk. His hands stop and he looks breathlessly down at her. 
“If I want Clint to fuck you while you fuck me?” It’s heady. The smells, the vibrations, the heat coming off their bodies. She’s a little lust drunk but she knows it’s unlikely she’d be able to take them both at once without practice. Coulson whimpers slightly and Clint grinds down on her in appreciation of her plan. “If I just want to suck you dry with Clint?” Apparently Clint’s in favor of every plan because his hips buck again. 
“Damn girl” Clint hisses a smile in his voice. Daisy tosses him a smile over her shoulder. 
“What if I love you.” Coulson’s words make her head whip around. He doesn’t look any less debauched or horny but damn if he doesn’t look softer now. Sweeter. Half dressed and hard. His face tender and honest. Daisy feels her eyes water even as she smiles. 
“Good.” She nods. “That’s so good.” She leans forward to press kisses to his collar bone hands trailing down his sides. Daisy chases them with soft kisses, biting briefly at his nipples just to hear him hiss. Its a sweet trail down and she’s on her knees soon pressing kisses to the flesh right above his belt. It’s soft but only a little she can feel the muscles churning under each kiss. 
“Can we?” She tilts her head slightly. Coulson nods and Clint sinks to his knees beside her grinning. 
“Such a beautiful girl you have Coulson.” Clint hummed as Daisy fumbled with the his belt buckle. Coulson made a noise of agreement. “When he told me about Skye I was so jealous you sounded so fun.” Daisy doesn’t stop her movements but does turn to look at Clint a little. Out of all of them Clint’s the only one still dressed and it’s kind of silly they can’t stop to concentrate on getting completely naked. 
“Sweet Skye who made him smile again.” Clint pressed a kiss to her shoulder again hands coming up to help her free Phil from his slacks. “and then Brave Daisy who made him so hard.” Clint gave a wicked grin. Coulson steps free of his pants becoming leading contender for most naked. Daisy is so okay with this. 
“He didn’t do you justice baby, so sweet, I love it” Clint stroked his hands threw Phil’s leg hair, an odd gesture but it seemed familiar in a way that suggested Clint petted him a lot. Clint was certainly petting her a lot. “I love you” He confessed into her hair. “Both of you”
The confession catches Daisy off guard and she turns to kiss Clint again. He chuckles and then turns her attention back to the man in front of her. She gives Coulson a sultry smile, lips red from all the kisses, before she takes his head in her mouth. 
“Daisy!” Coulson’s voice is high and tight and Clint laughs at him a little. “Oh God Daisy”. She smiles around his length as she slips lower on his shaft trying to angle her eyes up to look at him. He’s looking right at her and it’s almost too much. Those baby blues watching her hungrily. Clint’s lips haven’t left her shoulders but his hands are kneading her breasts and pulling at her nipples. One of his thighs has slid in between where she’s kneeling and she can almost get a perfect view of Phil’s eyes while grinding down on the thighs that have been making life at the base one horny nightmare. The pressure on her clit, the weight of Phil in her mouth, the feelings rolling of the two of them in hot steady hums of vibration are too much and before she realizes it she’s shuddering on Clint’s thigh eyes shut tight as she exhales sharply into Coulson’s pelvis.
She pulls back slowly releasing his now slick cock with a pop and a slight train of drool from his tip to her lower lips. It’s kinda gross but really sex is, especially when the parties are this interested. She gives a goofy smile. 
“Sorry,” Her voice is raspy and she clears her throat a little. “I’ll close my eyes next time, draw it out.” She promises. Coulson laughs and Daisy thinks this is how everything should be. 
“That was so sexy Daisy.” Coulson’s hand reaches down to cup her face. “You’re too much I thought I was a goner a few times.” Clint grunts his agreement still mouthing needily at Daisy’s skin. 
“Here trade me Barton” Daisy gestures for them to swap places and Clint eagerly shuffles forward Phil’s still hard cock. “Ah!” She pulls at his shirt and he huffs shucking it off quickly before sinking his face into Coulson’s crotch. He doesn’t take him in his mouth yet just nuzzles at him tongue darting out to tease his balls. Coulson hisses and clenches his hands on the desk. Daisy smiles and works to free Clint form his tact pants.
Clint moans when Daisy touches him and he finally takes Coulson in his mouth. He works quickly moving with certainly. Somehow Daisy even thinks that’s sexy. Means he’s done this before. 
“You look mighty comfortable there Clinton.” She smirks pressing herself to his back to murmur into his ear. “How many times have you done this?” Clint gives another groan and Daisy’s nipples are so sensitive against his bear back but she wiggles more enjoying the slight pull of skin on skin while she works him.
“Thousands.” Coulson growls out hand coming to rest on Clint’s head. “Thousands of times Daisy” He fists his hand in Barton’s short hair tugging gently. 
“You lucky dog” Daisy laughs squeezing him a the base. Clint whimpers thrusting into the tight ring she’s made. “You’ll have to teach me Clint would you like that? I bet he could teach me things about you too.” She doesn’t loosen the fist but she looks up at Coulson. 
“The best way to suck you, the best way to ride you, the best way to open you up, I’d fuck you it you let me.” She confesses. Coulson hisses at her words like she was touching him. He looks close and she smiles sweetly. 
“Clint” Coulson says sharply. Barton obviously knows what this means because pulls back and leans into Daisy hips still thrusting into her fist. Coulson scoots forward towering right above them stroking himself quickly and surely. 
“Is he gonna come on us Clint? huh? Gonna make us up? You gotta come too Clint!” Daisy licks her lips and feels a little wild. This is so fucking hot. She wonders who’s gonna come first.
“Oh! Oh! Daisy!!” 
Clint, but only by a second. He comes so hard he rocks up into Daisy’s fist and has to reach out to grab Phil’s thigh to steady himself.  The call of her name so sweetly tugs at her heart and she’s babbling when Phil finally spills over them both shooting white streaks in their hair and on their bare chests. It’s so fucking hot. Daisy doesn’t need to cum again not yet but they’ve been putting on the sexiest show she’s ever seen. She wraps her arms around Clint burrowing into his back shuddering. 
“Daisy girl you’re shaking” Clint’s voice pulls her back into the room. Phil is sitting in her chair naked, exhausted and concerned looking. Daisy wonders how long she was silent. She meets his eyes and smiles softly. Phil blushes slightly and motions at her face. 
“You uhh have something there” He whips his own cheek. She barks out a laugh and settles into Clint’s slightly sticky embrace. She’s sticky and sweaty and oddly damp but so happy. 
“I do love you.” She tells Clint softly. “I’m glad we found you.” He presses a kiss to her forehead. 
“Me too”
She looks over at Coulson. Naked Coulson, face no different from the kind eyes that she dreams about at night. How’d she get so lucky?
“And I’ve always loved you.” His grin is disbelieving and excited all at once. “I’m lucky you found me.” She smiles this is the best she’s felt in forever. 
“See I heard it was more like kidnapping” Clint interjects. Daisy laughs as Phil groans hiding his face in his hands. 
“Way to ruin the moment Barton.” Daisy wriggles out of his arms to perch in Coulson’s lap shaking her head. 
“Just calling it how it is” He winks beaming. 
He’s so fucking smug but Daisy doesn’t mind this time. and probably won’t mind the time after. He is awful cute and Daisy’s once again feels relief they found him so they could all three find each other. 
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sly-punk1712 · 7 years ago
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Night Moves
AN: For this most part this is harmless just a cute little fluff. It does mention panic attacks and touches indirectly on body issues (Steve’s) so if that’s not something your interested in skip Steve’s dreams
If anyone had asked Tony, which for the official Pepper report, no one did, He’d say this was all Darcy’s fault. If the intern had just submitted to his inquisition then he wouldn’t have had to invade everyone’s privacy and he wouldn’t be trying to stem the blood flow from his broken nose. As soon as this blew over he was going to write it down somewhere official they were no longer hiring pesky tag along interns, certified geniues only. But Lewis was already here so he probably couldn’t kick her out. 
She had been sleeping in his lab almost a month now. She was just as restless as the other scientists and would meander from lab to lab until she tired. So Tony let her sleep on his cot. Just polite. It was on such a night that he tinkered over improved repulser links when he heard the murmur of gentle laughter. Tony looked up from his work and glanced around. Darcy was sprawled on her back one arm covering her eyes from the harsh light of the lab. Her mouth was curved into a small smile and she was chuckling softly. Tony smiled she looked peaceful, young. A swell of affection rushed over him. She was alright. 
It was nice to see someone who slept without worry in his tower. This thought was interrupted by a fuller laugh as the intern started to wakefulness the ghost of her dream still pulling her lips up at the corners. She blinked slowly still chuckling. 
“Dreaming of me again, Double D?” Tony smiled as innocently as he could manage trying not to let on how curious he actually was. Darcy rubbed her face and stretched ignoring the man who so generously let her nap in his lab. 
“Don’t ask. If I say it out loud I lose” Darcy said this as if it made perfect sense. and to a person pre-coffee it probably did. To Tony it was just the tip of the iceberg. He raised a brow but the young brunette simply waved him off still chuckling. 
Little did she realize the absolute shit show she had begun in his life.
******************************
“This is a terrible idea. I would literally rather build Ultron again.” Bruce said rubbing his temples to combat the headache Tony was giving him. Tony scoffs.
“First of all, That wasn’t a bad idea just a poor execution. Second off, how could this go wrong?” Tony pushed the glasses up onto his head and peered at his tablet once more. Bruce just made a noise and headed for an exit.
“You are 100% on your own.”
“You’re gonna miss it!”
“I’m leaving!!” and he did. It was almost like he thought his disapproval would stop him. No he was committed. It had been three weeks of her giggling laughter and refusal to tell the joke. He had even recalibrated his memory projection glasses just to sneak a peek. Tonight he thinks, tonight it will go flawlessly. 
No sooner had he thought it than the giggle sounded softly from the feed Jarvis had playing on his tablet. 
“No time to waste!” He beamed and slid the glasses down to rest on the bridge of his nose. one last breath and he slide the gear to on. 
This was one of the most nauseating experiences of his life. and he wasn’t sure if it was the glasses or the scene before his eyes. Steve was dressed in some sort of toga? Tony tilted his head and wondered closer looking for Darcy. Surely if this was her dream she’d be in it right? There was no one in the garden that he could see so instead he scooted closer to Toga Steve.
Toga Steve sighed heavily and pouted dropping his chin to his hand. 
“If there’s a prize for rotten judgement, I guess I’ve already won that” Tony’s head snapped to look at the soldier in abject horror. Toga Steve was singing. 
“No man is worth the aggravation.” 
What sort of hell was this? Tony looked around for Darcy as Toga Steve continued. Suddenly as T.S. lamented his love life Darcy appeared legs crossed, also wearing a Toga on a bench near Toga Steve. but she wasn’t alone.
Beside her, also in togas, were SHIELDs deadliest assassins. Barton with his usual reflective sunglasses and purple hearing aids, Natasha with the widow bites and pom-poms?
“Who you think you kidding? He’s the earth and heaven to ya!” All three new arrivals to the dream began to sing in time to T.Steve’s tune.
“Try to keep it hidden, honey, we can see right through you.”  This line brought movement from the trio as they followed Steve and began some sort of synchronized dance. It was one tenth terrifying and nine tenths hilarious. It’s no wonder she woke up laughing. Tony felt himself swell with laughter despite the fear he initially felt. That laughter wasn’t his. A side effect from being in Darcy’s psych? Honestly he wasn’t sure these glasses would even work much less work so well.
“Steve you can’t Conceal it, we know how your feeling and who your thinking of!”
“No chance no way! I won’t say no NO!” Toga Steve flounced away dramatically spinning the hem of his toga up a little.
“You swoon you sigh why deny it uh oh!” The assassins swayed in perfect time faces stone but seemingly earnest. 
“It’s too cliche I wont’ say I’m in loovv” 
Before Toga Steve could finish his line Tony was ripped away. Thankfully, Lewis had a twisted sense of humor.
*****************
And the other room Darcy awoke with a sharp laugh and a smile still splitting her face. 
****************
Instead of waking up Tony found himself standing in a familiar room. Jane’s lab? His suspicion was confirmed by Thor walking in?
“THOR?!?!” He hadn’t mean to shout but this was an odd time for the asgardian to come waltzing in. His heart raced behind his reactor and he felt a surge of relief and tinges of longing. Not really his feelings but still strong. The beefy blond paused in surprise. “What are you doing here buddy?”
“I’m here to collect my Lady Jane for our date. Why are you here Anthony?” He tilted his head curiously like a oversized labrador. Date? The awnser appeared before he could even verbalize his confusion. The lab doors opened again and Jane came crashing through looking nothing like the Jane he had seen half an hour ago. For one thing, this Jane was showered and looked well rested. and in a sparkly dress. Tony made to push the glasses up and rub his eyes. 
When he reached his face he found no cool glass and metal. No glasses. So this was a dream. Jane’s dream if he had to guess. He had thought Thor looked extra ripped. 
“Hey Sorry I’m... Tony?” Jane asked in confusion. He waved sheepishly in greeting. 
“Sorry I think I’m lost.” He gestured over his shoulder feeling odd for intruding. If this was Jane’s dream he didn’t want to intrude on her time with Thor, imagined or not. He felt the longing she did and knew he needed to evacuate quickly before the tears or the sex. This dream was likely to go either way at the moment.
 He opened the door that normally would have lead to his lab and hastened threw.
******************* 
In Jane’s actual lab she awoke face drool glued to a paper. She peeled her cheek free and groaned. No Thor. but why would Tony be there?
*********************
When he closed the steel door behind him his gaze lighted on a room that was most certainly not his lab. It was a dimly lit, rather drafty bedroom. In the bed before him was a woman. Pale, skinny, blond and unmoving. His heart sank slightly. His own feeling.  Beside her to the left stood a young Bucky Barnes hat in hand eyes rimmed red with tears. To her right holding her hand... well Tony wished he could leave this right now. Bruce was right. This was the worst idea he’d ever had.
Steve knelt, not small and sickly, like a 1930s him should have been. Instead he was in his uniform, strong and handsome, huge hands swallowing her slender one, face soaked in tears and snot. 
“No Ma, please, Look at me, I’m here, It’s me Stevie” He babbled not letting her hand go. “Ma look! I did it! I’m so much better now Ma, healthy and tall. I can take care of us both now Ma. Please just look at me.” Tony had never heard Steve talk like this. Like he was from fresh off the boat. An Irish accent cut threw the Brooklyn accent he sometimes spoke with. not a trace of the midwestern show horse the USO tour made him.
“Ma!” He cried and for being the biggest one in the room he sounded like a little boy to Tony’s ears. Bucky moved forward and Tony left out a soft sigh, Barnes would handle this, make Steve stop hurting.
Barnes rested his hand on Steve shoulder calling, Steve’s gaze to meet his. The young man gave a crooked smile, Tony had seen a thousand times. 
“Let her go Stevie. Being big isn’t gonna fix this.” Tony’s gut clenched, this dream stank of something sinister. “Didn’t help me did it?” His face was still in the kind smile even as his words made Steve recoil. Tony’s heartbroke, a Steve feeling. 
“No Steve!” Tony couldn’t be silent anymore. The dream morphed around him and he was looking up at the sky. The light blinded him and he could barely make out Steve’s face against the bright sky. 
“Tony please!” Steve sank to his knees. “Damnit Jarvis let him go. Tony hang on.” Tony realized he couldn’t move. He was trapped. In his suit. Steve’s fingers clawed helplessly at the armor. “Tony!!” Steve’s voice was getting distant. Tony’s chest felt tight. was this a panic attack in a dream? Could he die here if he died in Steve’s dream? His heart began to race and fear pounded thicker than his blood. 
“I’m sorry” Steve sat back, bloody hands on clutching in his hair rocking slightly. He was giving up. Oh God Steve wake up!! He thought desperately.but  his vision began to shrink and go dark. As the darkness overtook the sky his panic faded to calm, fear settling into rest and Tony saw his mother and Steve’s holding out their hands.
***************************
Steve bites his tongue when he wakes up, startling violently upright sweat covering his body. After a few deep breaths he sighs. Just a dream. He can hear the sound of Bucky’s documentary playing in the living room and takes a fortifying breath. Everything is okay. He’s home.
***************************
His eyes opened once more to blinding light. He sat up in a slight panic hands flying to his chest. His hands moved so that was something. He sent up a silent prayer that Bruce would find him soon. or at least that there would be no more nightmares. He shuddered. Poor Steve. 
Panic settling he examined the terrain to find himself in a soft green field. An open empty place that looked a bit like late spring. A single tree broke up the landscape the only thing visible in this vast dreamscape. He trotted toward it. In dream time distances pass oddly and he found himself running up on the tree faster than he’d intended he screeched to a halt when he saw who was seated beneath the tree weapons drawn, eyes narrowed. 
Natasha, Clint and Agent were all in some weird killer puppy pile, sprawled across each other looking practically peaceful save the angry looks and sharp knives there were holding. He held his hands up in surrender not moving. They assessed him shrewley.
“I don’t want trouble.” He said honestly. Dying once in a dream was bad enough he’d rather not give them reasons to kill him again. 
“What do you want?” Asked Agent. 
“Just to rest” Tony answered after a moment. “Just to sit and be with you.” He shuddered at the acceptance that filled him. It was finality as he’d never felt it. Natasha nodded and even tho they went back to lounging no one put away their weapons. Tony didn’t dare move any closer instead keeping his hands visible he sank to the ground. Into what was probably the softest grass he could even imagine. Actually he couldn’t imagine it and that’s why it was someone else’s dream. but whos? No thought or feeling projected in a way that was helping him decipher. Clint or Natasha? Natasha or Clint?
The four of them sat contented for what felt like a long time. The spysassins gently combing fingers over Agent Agent. Tony enjoying the peace and also studying the pair. This wasn’t how he ever got to see them. So fucking happy. It tugged somewhere deeper than his heart. He closed his eyes to enjoy it.
Maybe it didn’t matter who’s dream this was. Maybe that was the point it was less a dream than a rest. maybe it was both of their dreams. Tony opened his eyes to look at him teammates and their handler. He said a prayer to whoever answered his prayers that this could be every dream for them. Tony was glad they decided to stay in his tower. That joy just made this dream invasion all the more terrible. Something else swelled in his heart. Something sour. Regret. He didn’t want to be here.
“I’m going to go now.” He said finally. His voice was soft but not hoarse like an unused voice should be. Three steely eyes rested upon him. Natasha nodded first. Clint closed his eyes with a small smile and Agent hummed in chest. 
Tony stood and made to walk away.
“Tony.” He couldn’t tell who spoke. He turned regardless. “We’re glad you’re here” None of the three’s mouths moved but he still heard it. If anyone could figure out telepathy just for the sake of being closer to someone it’d be these two. Tony smiled and began his trek into the openness of the field. 
******************
Natasha and Clint woke without moving. Her eyes opened and alert swept the room. He gave a soft groan at being woken from a good dream. Their eyes met briefly before  they settled deeper into their bed and each other’s arms. Unwilling to wake just yet. Contented.
*******************
Tony awoke to being sucker punched in the face. The greenness of the Agents’ dreams popped from view as the bridge of his glasses was violently propelled into his nose. 
“HOT FUCK!” He cried hands shooting to his face. Threw watery eyes he saw the small crowd standing in front of the chair he’d started this whole fasco in. Steve in a fresh tee shirt and sleep pants arms crossed frowning at him, Jane in her lab coat looking Pissed with a capital P. Bruce shaking his head slightly and lastly Darcy shaking her hand out indicating she’d been the one to break his nose.
“W’at was dat for?” He pouted pushing the glasses off his face and into his hair.
“Like you don’t know!” Jane snapped and left the room in a huff. 
“Otay I’m sobta sobby.” He shrugged. “But Da’cy woulbn’t tell me ‘er dream” He pouted tilting his head back. “T’at was a good d’eem do, Ah like ‘oga Steebe.” He grinned. Bruce and Steve gave Darcy a look.
She flushed. 
“That is nothing what it sounded like. Toga Steve is hot for Toga Bucky who  never makes it to my dream because I wake up laughing at the singing.” She babbles. Bruce once again pinches his nose and throws a towel in Tony’s direction. Steve blushes. 
“So Smooth Da’cy.” He smiles. She glares and stomps out too. Steve looks at Tony uncertainty. 
“Are you okay Tony?” Steve asks finally.
“Mah Nose Is bwoken but dat’s otay” He shrugs. “Are you?” Tony tilts his head so the bleeding stays minimal but he can eye Steve. Steve shrugs and runs a hand threw his hair. 
“Wasn’t a good night.” He rubs his neck. “Sorry my dream wasn’t funny.” Tony marvels at the man who’s apologizing to Tony when Tony was the one dream peaking. 
“Its otay Stebe, Ah’m sobby Ah made you sad” Steve’s eyes search his face closely and Tony turns to look at him properly most of the blood drying. Steve deserves to look at him properly.  There’s a long pause, it’s the stillest this room has ever been with him in it. Bruce watches puzzled.
Steve gives a crooked smile and nods once. 
“Goodnight Tony” Steve says softly making for the door.
“Night Stebe. Sweet Dreams” Tony grinned at Steve’s parting scoff. Bruce waits till the door is closed before clearing his throat expectantly. 
“W’at?” 
“Well?”
“Welp W’at?” 
“Aren’t you gonna tell me what her dream was?” Bruce for all his nay saying was just as curious as he was! Tony beamed and held a hand dramatically to his chest. 
“B’uce dat’s a hooge viola’ion of privacy!!”
“You literally violated everyone’s privacy tonight!!!” Bruce protested.
“Yea well this is mah learning from may mishakes” 
Bruce’s eye twitched dangerously but he merely snatches Tony’s dream hopping glasses and stomps back to his lab. 
“And you said it was a bad idea!” He shouts. Theirs the sound of glass smashing probably the 600 thousand dollar dream glasses.  It was not a bad idea. 
His nose throbs.
Okay maybe it was a dumb idea, but only maybe and he’s gonna right that in the Pepper report later. 12 percent of a dumb idea.
On his way toward his apartment he passes Darcy on his cot, soft smile starting on her face. He pauses thinking about the all dreams he visited. 
And maybe tag along interns weren’t so bad.
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