slowly52

[slowly52]

some aesthetic words for your fic title! (pt.1)

alexithymia (n) the inability to express your feelings

cosmogyral (adj): whirling around the universe

euneirophrenia (n): the peace of mind that comes from having pleasant dreams

scintila (n); a tiny, brilliant flash; a small thing; a barely visible trait

anagapesis(n): no longer have any feelings for one you once loved

mangata (n); the reflection of moon on water

serendipity (n); finding luck without even looking for it

selenophile (n) the person who loves the moon

nyctophilia (n); love for darkness or nght, finding relax and comfort in the darkness

drapetomania(n); an overwhelming urge to run away

gumusservi (n): moonlight shining on water

clinomania (n); the excessive desire to stay in your bed

basorexia (n); the overwhelming desire to kiss

solivagant (adj) wandering alone

sehnsucht (n): the inconsolable longing in the human heart for we know not what, a yearningfor far, familiar, non- earthy land one can identify as one’s home

redamancy (n); the act of loving one who loves you, a love returned in full

hireath (n); a home sickness to a home which you cannot return, a home which maybe never was, the nostalgia, the yearning, the grieve for the lost places of your past

 alamort (adj) : half- dead of exhaustion

viridity (adj): naive innocent

numinous (adj): describing an experience which makes you fearful yet fascinated, awed yet attracted, the powerful personal feeling of being overwhelmed and inspired

[slowly52]

(my favorite) ways to say i love you

you’re really something, aren’t you

come here

sit next to me?

you’re my favorite

i was just thinking about you

i notice you all the time

here, i made this for you

this song reminds me of you

if you do it, i’ll do it

i miss you so much

i wish i had known you sooner

you’re warm

[slowly52]

not together but connected.

[slowly52]

Also, drink your water or you're straight.

:( oke

[slowly52]

Give me a jungkook who's crush already has a man. They're at a dinner party, and Kook can't stand seeing reader and his man being all cute. Love you dude, full homo 🌠

u got it babey

love u too, only half homo tho 💖

[slowly52]

[ it hurts ]

[ unrequited love || j.k x m.reader ]

a/n: this was requested !! it's really short :( and i don't know if it's what you wanted, but i hope you like it :'^)

@koko-bopp

• • •

sometimes, i imagine what it would feel like to be with you. being able to hold your hand, to kiss your lips. to call you when i'm feeling down, and to hear your kind words trying to cheer me up. what it would feel like if you loved me, instead of him.

sitting across from you, i can't help but to look at you two. how you smile to each other, or how you hold each other's hands under the table. at moments, i think about how cute you look together, how happy you make each other feel, and even if it's just for a few seconds, i'm glad that my best friend is the one making you happy.

but it hurts.

—

"you haven't talked much all night, are you alright?" you say, sitting next to me on one of the couches. i look at you, and you probably can't hear it, but my heart starts beating twice as fast.

"oh, yeah. i'm okay, just a bit tired" i smile at you, and you chuckle. you put your arm around my shoulder, getting closer. your cologne has worn out by now, but there's still a faint scent. i wonder if this is what it feels like.

—

sometimes i feel like you do it on purpose. like you know what it does to me when you act like that. sometimes i even think i have a chance. that one day i'll be the one you'll look at like that.

but then you took out a ring.

i promise, i swear, i was happy for you. when he said yes, and when you held him in your arms when he started tearing up. i was very happy.

but it hurt.

[slowly52]

A Kissing Prompt List

Places Where People Kiss:

In the rain.

In a vehicle.

In the street.

On the sidewalk.

In the shower.

In the kitchen.

In the snow.

Under the stars.

In the moonlight.

By the river.

In the water.

In the bedroom.

In a bar.

At a party.

At the other’s place.

By a campfire.

Reasons to kiss:

Life or Death

Love

Celebration

Longing

Missing the other

Relief

Lust

Need

No reason at all

Admiration

Power

First Kiss

Confessing feelings

A bet

Sad or hurt feelings

First date

[slowly52]

AHHHHHHHHH! 💖💞💞💖💕💖💖💞💖💞💖💕💖💞💖💞💖💕💖💞💖💞💖💞❤💖💖💖

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH💕❤️💕❤️💖💕❤️💕❤️💖💕💕❤️💕❤️💕❤️💕 indeed

[slowly52]

BRO IM SURPRISED YOU KNOW I EXIST I LOVE YOUR STUFF WTF

YEA I FOLLOW YOU WITH MY MAIN ACCOUNT I GOT SO EXCITED WHEN YOU STRATED FOLLOWING ME DJSJDJN I LOVE YOUR STUFF TOO !!

[slowly52]

I hate how you can be gay, talented and evil for fuck's sake 🤧 'maybe' made me feel some kind of way.

mdndjsnj i had that shit saved for FOUR WHOLE MONTHS trying to give it a good ending and i kinda forgot i had it but today i just went "do i really want a good ending tho" and did *that* :^) (also i really like your stuff and im kinda panicking right now eheh thank yOu ily)

[slowly52]

[ maybe ]

love isn't supposed to be painful.

—

maybe it's how soft your skin feels under my fingertips, or maybe it's the way you crave my touch every time we're together. maybe it's the way you run your hands through my hair, or maybe it's the breathy laughs you leave every time i kiss your neck. maybe it's the way our hearts align, or maybe it's the way you look at me, like you need me.

—

tracing patterns across his lover's chest, the memories of just moments ago were still running fresh through his head. the sounds, the sensations, still lingering in the back of his mind.

to taehyung, nights like these were so rare. the nights when the other wouldn't just leave him behind. the nights when they would talk, just pretending for a little moment that what they had could be considered normal. keeping up with each other's lives, telling jokes, almost like a normal couple.

to taehyung, nights like these were precious. his little secret treasures, that he would have to hide again as soon as he came back to his normal life. the memories of him, that would leave him craving just one more night.

—

maybe it's how well your body knows mine, or maybe it's how careful you are with every move you make. maybe it's the vibrations your voice makes every time i hide my head in your chest, or maybe the sweet words you whisper into my ear, just the way you know i like them.

maybe that's what makes me need you so much.

—

"... you're leaving?"

taking his hand, it made the other turn around. the sight in front of him made it tempting to stay, but it wasn't that simple. if they stayed together for too long, people would get curious, and ruining teahyung's career was the last thing he wanted to do.

"you know i have to"

"do you, though? can't you stay just for a little bit?" sitting up, he wrapped his arms around the other's shoulders. "just for a few minutes... no one will know, i promise"

—

but when it comes to you, i don't mind being a bit of a masochist.

[slowly52]

[ under the moonlight ]

[ 1:36 am ]

"do you think they're gonna notice you're gone?"

"they're too busy getting wasted to worry about me, it's okay"

the streets, that were once bright and noisy, were slowly getting calm as the two got closer to the ocean. the loud bass and the flashing lights replaced by the soft sound of the waves hitting the shore and the white shine of the moon. it felt almost magical, being able to just be there, together.

"i missed you" the slightly younger one said, standing awkwardly besides his long time best friend. letting out a chuckle, the other tightly held his hand.

"i missed you too, y/n".

just a few minutes passed until the older's phone started to flood with notifications. apparently the others did notice he was gone, and were already asking where he was.

"huh, they really can't live without me"

he took his hand away so he could answer to the messages, and the younger started missing his touch right away.

"are you gonna go back?"

"i don't know, should i?" the way seokjin's eyes shined under the stars was just enough to take his breath away, making it hard to answer. "if you want me to stay, i'll stay"

oh, and the way he talked, so smoothly, was enough to make his heart flutter.

"just for a bit longer"

[slowly52]

How do you feel about writers who post their fanfics with gender neutral readers with the male reader tag?

i don't really care as long as it's actually neutral and not just changing the pronouns to they

[slowly52]

[ run away ]

[ yoongi x male reader ]

some kind of gang!au, though im pretty sure it's really far away from reality.

—

"you really gotta stop fighting everyone" yoongi said in a whisper, taking care of his friend's bruised hands. "what did he do this time, anyway?"

"he was talking shit"

"yeah, i know. you always say that". after the bruises were clean, he stood up from the edge of the bathtub he was sitting at, then threw away the dirty cotton. "but what was he saying?"

"you don't wanna know"

"oh, really?" he sat again, this time on the younger's lap. they weren't really dating, but they were pretty close. making out here and there, hooking up from time to time. casual, as it worked for them.

"... it was about you, that's all i'll tell you" he said, running his hands through yoongi's thighs. his knuckles still hurt, but it wasn't anything he couldn't deal with.

"well, now i wanna know even more" he chuckled, putting his arms around the other's neck and resting their foreheads against each other. "what did he say, y/n? i won't ask you again"

yeah, that was one thing he always did. he knew he had him whipped, wrapped around his finger. if he wanted something, y/n would always give it to him. he tried not to use his influence on the younger very often, but sometimes it was fun to play around for a bit.

"... i don't wanna tell you, hyung"

"y/n... please"

"he said gross things. things you don't wanna hear"

"come on, i wanna know. i deserve to know, don't i?"

"hyung, i'm serious..."

the younger could be really stubborn at times. though, it wasn't good to push him. yoongi cared deeply for him, and he knew that if he really didn't want to talk, then it was better to keep it that way. even if he tried to keep his strong facade, when it came to him, it wasn't that easy.

"... okay. i'll trust you. i can trust you, right? you had good reasons?"

"you're always a good reason. you know i wouldn't lose my energy on meaningless shit"

"yeah... i know" he ran one of his hands through the younger's hair, then pecked his lips, trying to reassure him.

that was kinda how they worked together. ever since they met, the younger would always feel the urge to protect the other. physically, he was way stronger than yoongi, so he felt like it was his duty to make sure he was safe from the people that wanted to hurt him. always getting into fights, he was used to the bruises all over his body, that would soon add up to the collection of scars. he was used to the pain.

for yoongi, it was the other way around. ever since he was a kid, he learnt how to deal with his emotions. to keep a straight face, to fake a smile, or even shed a tear or two if needed. sometimes he regretted it, not being able to show his emotions anymore. he missed the days when he could be genuine.

so, when they found each other, it was as if they fit perfectly into one mold. both making each other stronger, filling the voids in each other's hearts.

—

they were still teenagers when everything started. yoongi never was the dangerous type, so when people started making him a "target", he didn't really know how to defend himself. he didn't care, though. if he got hit, he didn't care. he was alone, anyway. if no one else cared, why would he?

at some point, y/n got into the picture. hanging out with the wrong people, he always ended up at the wrong places. being in a place neither of them should be at, that's how they met.

with bruises all around his torso and spitting blood out of his mouth, the younger laid there on the cold floor. all of his friends had run away, and left him alone with a problem that wasn't even his in the first place. every punch and every kick hurt like hell, but he knew the pain would eventually stop. maybe they would leave him alone, or maybe they would end up killing him. at that moment, both felt like a good end.

in the end, it turned out to be the first option. still, he didn't want to get up, so he stayed there, bloody and cold.

"hey, dude, wake up" is the first memory he has of yoongi's voice. looking at his face, he felt like he was already in heaven. "come on, wake up. you can't stay here all night. you'll get sick"

eventually, they ended up at yoongi's place. ever since then, it was always him who took care of his bruises. because, well, the fights didn't stop, and when he started being the cause of the fights, he kinda felt like that was the least he could do.

• • •

"wanna know a secret, hyung?" the younger said, quite slurred. the alcohol in his veins was already making an effect, and he was having trouble with filtering his words.

"... okay" yoongi said, gaze stuck in the book in front of him.

"it was me" he chuckled and laid his body across the other's lap, then lifting his own hand and playing with his hair from there.

"... what are you talking about?"

"you know, the people who used to make fun of you?" he sat up again, this time getting way too close to his face. yoongi could smell the alcohol in his breath, but that didn't bother him anymore. he tried to make him stop drinking a few times before. tried to convince him of not throwing away his youth like that, but he didn't listen.

"... y/n, don't-"

"i did it! i made them stop!" he exclaimed as he got up and started dancing around, excitement all around his body.

"... what?" the book long ago forgotten, he got up too and went to keep his friend from falling. he was worried that he may have done something stupid, once again. though, deep down, he was happy. was it really over? would they really stop?

"well, i didn't do it alone. you should thank hoseok and namjoon too"

after a few seconds of silence, he chuckled. yeah, he was scared as fuck. scared that they would come back worse than before. but, shit, he was happy. this kid, who he picked up from the street a few months ago, didn't just solve one of his biggest problems. he got him a family, and one that he could really trust from now on.

—

"hey, hyung..."

laying in bed, with the younger's arms wrapped around his waist, was when he felt like his own person again. those were the times when they could really talk to each other, heart to heart, without worrying about anyone else.

"yeah?"

shifting around, he placed his hands on the other's chest. looking up to his eyes, he knew there was something important he wanted to say.

"well, i've been thinking... you know, we're adults now, right?"

"yeah, technically. you still act like a child though" he chuckled, taking one of his hands to caress the younger's hair.

"well, that's kind of what i'm getting at" he stopped for a bit, thinking about the wording and trying not to mess it up. "i talked to the guys earlier, and we all kind of agreed that, uh... we should stop this, right?"

"what do you mean?"

"it's just... we grew up. we can't get away with shit like we used to anymore. one mistake and we're all gone, and i don't know if i wanna give up the chance of having a normal life just because of something i started when i was a kid, you know?"

"yeah, i get it" he nodded, giving him and understanding smile. "so, you wanna quit?"

"yeah. i mean, i know it's not that easy, but... i don't know. maybe we can just run away? together?"

thinking about it, it was nice. a chance to start over, in a new place, with new people. it would be hard to actually find a place, but the idea of starting a new life, with the man he had loved for so long... maybe it was actually worth a shot.

"as long as it's with you, i'm in"

[slowly52]

[ easier ]

—

[ is it easier to stay? is it easier to go?

i don't wanna know ]

—

03:56 AM

we've always been different from everyone else. the way we're so bad for each other, yet we still end up at the same place, every night. the way you crave my touch. the way i crave your warmth. how tender it feels to press my lips on your skin. how safe it feels to lock my arms around your waist. to know how much i need you, yet i can never find myself staying with you for a bit more time.

it's toxic.

and you could put all the blame on me, but you won't.

that's why we keep happening.

a different type of masochist, always looking for having your heart broken. night after night, knowing it will always end up the same way. never asking for anything different to happen, just expecting, and then getting disappointed.

but you keep letting it happen.

maybe things would be different if i gave you what you wanted. a few more minutes, just that.

but, if i give in, you'll get tired of me. because it's not me who you like. it's what we have, that always leaves you craving more.

it's toxic.

but that's why we keep happening.

maybe, if i stay like this, i can enjoy this for a bit more time, before you get tired of me.

[ but i know that i'm never gonna change.

and you know you don't want it any other way. ]

[slowly52]

『 i've been up all night, trying to get away. things ain't right, but i'll make a change 』

[slowly52]

[ stargazing ]

[ sometimes, jimin can't sleep. so he imagines things. ]

—

in nights like these, time goes by faster than usual. he lays on his back, then on his belly. he looks at his phone. he looks at the wall. he even tries looking at that little stain on the ceiling, and wonders how it got there. he thinks music can help, then it doesn't. when he wants to stop listening, he feels numb.

in nights like these, he doesn't even notice when it's already 2am.

sometimes, he gets to the point where he doesn't even feel like laying on his bed anymore.

he stands up, walks around the room for a bit. he looks at his reflection in the mirror hanging on his door. usually, he would find that scary, but the starts are so bright tonight, the room isn't even dark anymore. he thinks it's pretty. he feels pretty.

he walks around a bit more, enjoying he feeling of the soft carpet against his feet. then, getting near the window, he stares at the moon.

sometimes he feels like the moon is staring at him, too.

softly, he opens the window, getting one of his legs over de frame, and then the other. he sits there, the tips of his toes touching the roof of what is supposed to be the kitchen. the cold air hitting his face makes him feel refreshed.

at some point, he puts on his earphones again. stargazing, he doesn't feel so alone anymore. it feels like he has thousand of friends looking out for him, up there in the sky.

then, he closes his eyes. the music makes him forget about every problem he may have ran into during the day. after that, he remembers things that may have made him happy.

he thinks. he thinks a lot. he thinks about his future, about his friends, about his family. he even thinks about him.

thinking about him always has a relaxing effect.

when he's sad, he imagines how it would feel to have him by his side right now. how it would feel to talk to him. how it would feel to know him.

deep down, he knows it's dumb to love so much someone he made in his mind.

sometimes, he gets embarrassed. he feels like a little kid who makes up his own friends, so he doesn't feel so alone anymore. he doesn't need to, he thinks. he has real friends. why is he so attached to this fake boy that lives in his mind, anyway?

"i guess we all need a coping mechanism..." he murmurs to himself.

as he opens his eyes, he looks up at the sky again.

it always makes him remember the story his mom would read to him when he was little. the kid that never grew up, that lived in neverland with the other lost boys.

he always wished he could join them, up there in that perfect world for helpless children.

maybe he still does.

every now and then, he looks for that single spot in the sky that makes him feel a little closer to home.

the second star to the right.