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sleepynervewriting · 1 year ago

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Honestly, I didn't expect so many people to actually love my work. I'm actually so overwhelmed by the amount of notifications. So here it is; not completely finished, but I build the world up some more. Tell me if you want to be tagged for future updates. @technologyvoid

Thud thud thud. A loud banging on her door startled Nellie out of her sleep. Thud thud, the banging on the door continues.

For a moment she lays still, taking deep breaths to calm her racing heartbeat. As she came to her senses, she scrambled out of her canopy bed and hurried to the door; Rushing down her white marble stairs, her mind racing with possibilities. Who could be outside at this hour? And why wake her from her needed beauty sleep? She slowly opened the door, heart pounding in her chest, and she was met by a grim-faced police officer...

Nellie's heart sank, she did not expect visitors at this hour, especially not the police. What was she going to do? Most importantly, what was she going to say? She closed her eyes as she took a deep breath, adjusting her silk pyjamas to be more presentable.

Nellie's parents work important jobs, her mom is a judge; her dad is a lawyer. When they weren't at work, they'd teach her many things. As a child, she thought the information was boring and useless. But now, she couldn't be more thankful. "Miss Nellie, I'd like to have a word with you." Nellie stared at the cop's face with discomfort, keeping silent. The cop looks at Nellie; uncomfortable from the silence, she continues the one-sided conversation: "I... Your classmate named Serina; She seems to be missing" Nellie rubs her eyes, still drowsy from being woken up - trying her best to process this information. The officer, trying her best to gain information, continues speaking: "I heard from your classmates that You and Serina had quite the relationship — a negative one." Startled awake at the accusing words of the officer, she needs to hold her ground. "I have the right to remain silent. I won't speak to you without a lawyer. You're disrupting my peace and my sleep. Thanks for the news, miss. Goodbye." She gently closes the big door and watches the cop leave from the window. Now panicking at the few unnecessary sentences she spoke, she's sure she is going to be a suspect in Serina's disappearance.

Serina wakes up to the sound of chirping birds. She takes a deep breath, inhaling the succulent scent of flowers and wet grass. Relaxed; she drinks a sip of water, knowing she doesn't have to go to school - she's missing after all. By rubbing the sleep out of her eyes; she admires the beautiful forest scenery: birds flying, the trees dancing with the wind as honeybees buzz their lullabies. If only she could live like this forever.

Serina closed her eyes, feeling the warm sun on her face that shines between the leaves. She begins to ponder; will she truly benefit from never returning? Oh of course not! Serina brushes away the idea; it would be too stupid and dangerous - especially in the winter. Also, she has friends and family, why worry them? Her classmates respect her; they never did her any harm. The problem is Nellie. Nellie and her friends come from more well-off families, which means they also have more power in the city; surely her parents tried their best to raise Nellie to be a kind woman, right? Nellie is a beautiful girl, why couldn't she just be nicer?

The moment Elle saw the worried look on Nellie's face, she knew something was wrong, "Nellie? What's wrong — OMG! Was I correct the other day?" Nellie furrowed her brows "What are you talking about, Elle?" Elle looked at Nellie like a curious dog, trying her best to turn the cogs in her head. "Oh... right, I never told you that I thought she was going to go missing; In my defence-" Nellie gave Elle a big hug; well, it looked like one. In reality, Nellie shut Elle's mouth with her hand - trying her best for it to not look suspicious. Furious, she whispered in her ear: "Elle, I love you, but for the love of everything that's holy; shut your fucking mouth. We do NOT want to be associated with the disappearance of Samantha, OK?" Elle pulled out Nellie's grip, fixing her clothes and taking a deep breath. "Nellie, could I talk to you?" Nellie looked at Elle, hoping she doesn't say anything rash. "Nellie... by saying her name wrong; you aren't getting her attention — she isn't here." Nellie took a deep breath, and started walking to class; Elle quickly walks at her side. "You're right, I'm sorry. I would say her name wrong to see her reaction, but she isn't here. I understand." Elle sighs from relief, Nellie understands.

Serina is checking the forest around; looking for danger and foraging for food. Luckily for her, the animals that can do her most harm are wild boars - no bears. Not having to worry about bears, she begins her quest for edible plants. She has foraged many times before; this was nothing out of the ordinary, yet she felt nervous. The forest she foraged in was one she was familiar with - this is unknown terrain to her. Trying her best to not pluck something poisonous, she inspects every mushroom, fruit and plant that may be a poisonous variant of the one she knows. What if this forest is filled with poisonous plants? Her traps were empty, she'd have no backup food... She needs to find a river soon...

A cruel prank by your bullies leaves you separated from the rest of the class. Instead of finding your way back, you decide to “go missing” and let the consequences catch up to them.

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sleepynervewriting · 1 year ago

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Alright , here it is

I will finish this if people actually like this. So, yeah.

Serina looked around frantically, trying to locate her classmates, but to no avail. Her heart pounded in her chest, her breathing shallow as she realised that she had been separated from the rest of the class by some cruel trick played by her bullies. As her panic grew, she tried to think clearly and decide what she should do next. She couldn't think, her head felt so light she could pass out any moment. Tears filled her eyes as her panic became anger. How – How could she let them pull a trick like this on her? Why was she the victim of their cruelty? Why?

What had she done to deserve this? She took a deep breath, wiping away her tears as she thought of a plan. Today, and in the future; things will be different - she won't be kind to them anymore.

Her head looked down at the forest floor as she paced up and down, trying to find a way to make them guilty. A plan that will fill their minds with remorse; something that will break them. Serina came to a halt when a light went off in her head; the perfect plan. When she was a little girl, survival camp was where she went at the weekends. A fun activity that taught her needed survival skills and an important attitude. She needs to go missing.

Surviving in the wild, in a place you're not familiar is hard but she has faith. Her memories of the distant past may be vague but are still very helpful. By examining her surroundings, she knows she isn't far from the path. it would be a good thing, but her plan is to go missing. She marks the tree she is standing next to by hitting it with a rock, scraping away the moss, and making sure she doesn't truly get lost when she goes deeper into the forest. Her way of marking her path is by marking the tree from the direction she came from and marking the direction she goes. Her perfect strategy.

Nellie and her group of friends were giggling and celebrating the success of their amazing prank. The shame they felt was little; they didn't respect poor Serina. As they walked farther from the place they pulled the prank, the more they expected her to run back all teary-eyed to the class. She didn't - she didn't return.

Nellie's friend, Elle started to worry about Serina. "Nellie, it's been more than 2 hours now and-" a hand in her face interrupts her speech, the disapproving face of Nellie tells her everything, yet Nellie decides to speak: "Are you seriously worried about Sandra? It's only been more than 2 hours, she is going to return all dirty and we will laugh in her face, understood?" Elle nodded in agreement as she mumbled out a word that sounded like an understood, not even bothering to correct the fact she said the wrong name.

Elle loved to be unnecessarily cruel; she didn't want to be tied to someone going missing. Nellie wouldn't care, she is blind to her actions. You would need to shove a big TV with the words "Girl missing" to make her see the severity.

Serina had built herself a shelter, slightly raised from the forest floor to keep her body heat when sleeping and set up a few animal traps. Her plan was to be gone for 5 days; in this time she would definitely be reported missing, but not die from dehydration. When the sun started setting, she started a campfire to keep flies and bears away from her resting spot. Her class must have returned home by now. In a mix of excitement, nausea and nervousness, she went to sleep, waiting for the day she emerges out of the forest.

A cruel prank by your bullies leaves you separated from the rest of the class. Instead of finding your way back, you decide to “go missing” and let the consequences catch up to them.

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sleepynervewriting · 1 year ago

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Stay tuned, I want to write this.

A cruel prank by your bullies leaves you separated from the rest of the class. Instead of finding your way back, you decide to “go missing” and let the consequences catch up to them.

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sleepynervewriting · 1 year ago

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How to Write When You Don't Have Time

I might be losing my mind a little bit, but I swear someone asked me how to write when they don’t have time, but now I can’t locate the question in my inboxes or messages, but I thought I’d address it just in case someone actually did ask me this question. First off, let me start by saying, I may not be the best person to answer this. I’m not married, don’t have kids, and I work in the writing industry. So if anyone reading this has their own expertise to add to this post, please leave a comment for others. Before getting too far into this topic, I want to acknowledge that some people may be dealing with a lot of life challenges at the moment, with serious health problems, being a caretaker for a loved one, serious financial problems, and unforeseen life crises, and may be legitimately unable to work on their writing because they ran out of today’s time yesterday and their physical and mental stamina ran out before they got out of bed this morning. If you find yourself in such a category, don’t fret. Life happens. It won’t be this crazy forever. But for the average person who has at least half a grip on their crazy busy life but can’t quite squeeze writing into said life, here are some ideas that might help. 1. Get more out of your schedule by living with more intention.

Some of us human beings struggle to live intentionally. We pull out our phones to check on something, and before we know it, we’ve lost an hour to the social media black hole. Or we sat down to take a break and suddenly Netflix is asking us if we are still watching Stranger Things. I know what some of you are thinking: Isn’t this post supposed to be about people who are too busy to write? Not about people who are just sitting around? My point is, whether or not you actually spend hours unexpectedly watching Netflix, there are probably parts of your day you are living without intention, which usually means time is slipping through your fingers. Not everyone wants to live every hour intentionally. Many cultures and lifestyles around the world don’t; they just go with the flow and do whatever, like the beach lifestyle. What I am saying is that if you are a busy person who doesn’t have time to write, and you want to have time to write, this might be what you want to look at. Do you have behaviors and parts of the day where you are unintentionally losing time? Do you have the tendency to procrastinate things you don’t want to do, for example? Intentional living doesn’t mean you never get breaks. It means that when you take a break, you take breaks you intended to take. It doesn’t mean that you never have free time. It means that when you have free time, it’s something you intended. Intentional living means making every hour count, and getting rid of moments where time doesn’t. It means when you are doing something, you are doing something, not kind of doing it. If I’m cleaning my room, but sort of just leisurely cleaning it, I’m probably losing time. But if I decide to draw upon more intention, and clean my room more intentionally, I’ll make an effort to do it in a more efficient manner and get done quicker. So look at your lifestyle and see if you can free up more time by living more intentionally. And notice that I didn’t say you had to live at max capacity intention. I said more intention. 2. Don’t work harder. Work smarter.

There is a business show I love to watch called The Profit. In it, successful business man Marcus Lemonis goes into failing businesses and helps build them back up. One of the things Marcus says is that it’s better to work smarter than it is to work harder. And when you think about it, it makes perfect sense. Here is a simple example. Let’s say I’m working really hard at doing the dishes. I’m working as hard as I can, but my methods are random. I hand-wash and put the dishes away one by one. I’m putting a lot of time and effort into getting this kitchen clean. But you know what’s better than working harder at that method? Working smarter. Instead of hand-washing everything, I put them in the dishwasher. Instead of putting items away one by one as I wash them, I put them into piles and take the whole stack of plates to the cupboard at once. Working smarter is about looking for ways to work more efficiently. It’s about finding ways to get more done in the time you have, and finding easier but still effective methods. Pretty much everyone is doing something that could be done more efficiently. When you work smarter you can free up more time. Or, when you write smarter, you can get more done in the amount of time you have. 3. Stop using mental energy focusing on the fact you don’t have enough time.

My dad is a really busy person. One thing he said to me several months ago has stuck in my mind. He said, it’s amazing how much more you can get done when you stop thinking about how you can’t get it done. This is probably going to sound weird, but the way we think is also a usage of time–our mental time. The mental time we spend thinking about how we feel sorry for ourselves is mental time we could be putting to use in a different way. You might could even say we can try to think with more intention or to think smarter. Instead of thinking about how I don’t have time to do something, I could be spending the “mental time” and “mental stamina,” thinking about how I can do that thing more efficiently. Feeling sorry for ourselves about not having time often leads to sluggish demeanors and attitudes, and only makes it that much more difficult to be productive. It’s like we’ve dropped a boulder in our own path that we now have to push out of the way before we can continue. The older I get, the more I realize, how we think about things is everything. Unfortunately, though, when you make statements like that, you get a whole bunch of people going out and trying to micro-manage all their thoughts and feelings, and they actually end up just suppressing said thoughts and feelings. It’s not about suppressing–it’s not about telling yourself you aren’t allowed to think or feel that way, that breeds resentment toward self and unrealistic expectations. Instead, if you have a problem with the way you think, you acknowledge it and move on. Or, depending on how serious it is, you acknowledge it, work through it, and then move on. It takes time–maybe months or years–but eventually it won’t be a tendency to think that way anymore. I am a strong believer that in most circumstances, we can eventually change how we think. Anyway, my point is, stop using your “mental time” on thoughts that aren’t helpful to you. You don’t need them anymore. It’s not helpful to focus on how little time you have. What is helpful is focusing on how to best manage the time or task you have been given. What is helpful is spending your mental stamina on how you’ll build your better life, realistically. 4. Stop procrastinating and implement the 20-minute rule.

Learn to start doing something you don’t want to do, when you should do it. Don’t watch an episode first. Don’t play Candy Crush first. Sit down and start working. Remember, it’s okay if you really, really, really don’t want to do something. You are allowed to feel that way. But what matters is that you do it despite it. My brother and I have a method for when we don’t feel like working on something. It’s what I think of as the 20-minute rule. Now, I don’t know psychologically why this works, but it works for both of us almost every single time. And I’ve seen it work for many others. When you don’t want to work on something, you sit down and work on it anyway, telling yourself you only need to do it for 20 minutes. Now, you need to actually do the work intentionally–actually put in effort, not just sit there–and I don’t know why, but almost always, by 20 minutes in, you realize it’s not that bad. It’s like my dad always says, “Nothing is as bad as you think it’s going to be.” After 20 minutes, it’s easier to work longer, and I just keep working anyway. You can try this with anything you don’t want to do, in order to get it done quicker so you can free up writing time. But you can also do this with writing, when you finally have freed up a few minutes to write and don’t feel like writing. Just give yourself 20 minutes. I bet 9/10 times you’ll want to keep writing after the 20 minutes. 5. Use the percolation approach to writing.

There are discovery writers, people who like to just sit down and start writing and “discover” the story as they go; and there are outliners, people who like to outline the story before they start writing. But there is also another writing approach that’s very common that we don’t talk about much, which is the percolation approach. Percolation is when you get ideas for a story, and you let them sit in your mind for a while until you are ready to write them. If you don’t have a lot of time to write, or time to set aside to consistently write, the percolation method is a good one for you. You probably have ideas of what kind of stories you want to write. Let them sit in your mind. Let your subconscious take a stab at them. Think about them when falling asleep at night, or in the morning before you get out of bed. When you feel ready to write the scene and have a few minutes, you’re all ready to go. I think most writers use a little bit of all three methods. The tricky part about percolation is you might hit an area that doesn’t eventually come together on its own, so you do need to sit down and work it out. But, heck, you can even use the percolation method scene-by-scene. When one scene is ready to write, you write it. Then you let more ideas percolate, and then you write that scene. You don’t have to write chronologically either. Write the scenes you want, and before you know it, you might have half the book in your head done.

Keep reading

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sleepynervewriting · 1 year ago

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How to write red herrings

Here are some of my own tips on how to handle red herrings in your crime books! Have you got any of your own hints that have helped you?

🤔 What is a red herring?

This is a device specific to thrillers and mysteries where the reader is trying to actively solve the case as they read. The red herring is used as bait to throw the reader off the trail, and make them falsely suspect someone who isn’t the culprit.

So how can you use this device effectively?

This first thing to always keep in mind when writing crime books, is that you should make every single character at least a little bit suspicious.

🔎 Be serious in your herring setup

You should dedicate just as much time into making your readers believe someone is the culprit, as you do into the actual culprit.

This means that whomever you decide to paint as your red herring should have a plausible backstory, motive, or means of having committed the crime—rather than just be someone who acts shifty.

🔎 Separate your clues up into two parts

Whatever clue you use that ultimately unravels the identity of your culprit, never give the full picture when your sleuth first discovers it.

It should come in two parts—the first one to misdirect them, and the second one that gives an extra fine detail that can no longer be mistaken for anyone else but the true culprit.

🔎 Use two red herrings

Use your first one around the midpoint of your story, and in the final act, lead us on yet another trail, where the reader will expect this to be the final answer to the mystery.

But no! That final chase was also for naught, and you can reveal the true mystery at the very end of the book.

🔎 Bluff it out

You could hint at your real culprit first, making your readers think it’s a red herring, then follow the trail to a new suspect in the finale, when you pull another plot twist and reveal the first suspect was actually at fault.

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Order it now through the [link here] or below!

✉️ Got any questions? Write it below this post or send me a question on Instagram. [Sadly, still not all tumblr messages get delivered.]

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sleepynervewriting · 1 year ago

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How to make character deaths sad

Here’s my two cents on making character deaths sadder in your novel, with a quick example included!

Want to coax a tear out of your readers, but you don’t know how? Let me give you my best tips for this.

👉 Make them worth something

Killing a character off for the sake of doing it, or for bringing shock value, will only come off as a cheap plot beat. If you’re going to have a big character death, you should do it on purpose, know why you’re doing it, do it in the right moment, and know what consequences that death will bring.

👉 Dissect the big emotions down to their smallest atoms

Describing big emotions like grief or love is a surefire way to generalize the feeling and leave your readers’ eyes dry.

Instead, focus on feelings that are specific to the characters who are grieving and those they’ve lost. Do they have a line they often say to each other, an inside joke, a silly plan they never got around to?

Here are some examples:

Imagine a father and son who constantly fight over leftover cake in their fridge, and the son always gets to it first, while the dad gets left hangry, and complains how he never gets the last piece.

After a car accident, the dad is dying in his son’s arms.

Which line is going to hit you more?🤔

A) Dad, please, just hold, on, I can’t lose you.

B) You can’t die. I saved you the last piece of mom’s cake.

👉 Build up the character first

Readers won’t cry for someone they don’t care about. So if you already go into writing a book knowing you’re going to have some expendable characters who die, make sure you don’t gloss over their development. The more interesting their arcs and personalities are, the more probable it is that your readers will care for their deaths.

👉 Consequences can be stronger than the event itself

What I mean by this is that sometimes you don’t even have to cover the death scene in order to get the most feeling across. End one chapter with the character alive and well, and have the next one be without them—the feeling of emptiness in the rest of your characters without witnessing precisely what happened can work so well in many cases.

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NPA will help you outline your story idea, so you can write a full novel with ease and get that book deal you’ve always dreamed of.

Join by August 31st, through the [link here] or before the course goes back up to full price!

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sleepynervewriting · 1 year ago

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5 Most Common Mistakes with Dialogue

As an editor, I’ve been thinking about how I need to do a post on some of the most common mistakes I see in dialogue. Many are a matter of fine-tuning, moving from a great writer, to a professional one.

Dialogue Tags Don’t Match the Dialogue

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m not wholly against alternative dialogue tags (“groaned,” “cried,” “yelled,” “lamented,” etc.), and I think they can be particularly effective when the dialogue and the context of the story can’t portray the way that it’s said. For example:

“That’s great,” Melody groaned

But sometimes the dialogue tag honestly doesn’t fit the way it’s said. It’s hard to give an example of this in a blog post, because often whether or not the tag fits the dialogue depends on the context of the story. But look at this:

“Elephants use their skin folds to crush mosquitoes,” Milo whined

The direct dialogue doesn’t sound like whining. The content doesn’t sound like something to whine about, and the structure doesn’t sound like whining. But that is the chosen dialogue tag. It doesn’t fit.

“Elephants use their skin folds to crush mosquitoes,” Milo said matter-of-factly.

But sometimes you get weird combos like this:

“Elephants use their skin folds to crush mosquitoes,” Milo whined matter-of-factly.

I don’t know about you, but “whined matter-of-factly” sounds like something that’s pretty difficult to pull off.

Here are some more examples:

“I need to lose weight,” Taz wondered.

“Can I check into my hotel room now?” Kelly raged.

“Want to pick up the groceries?” Katie exclaimed.

Sure, grammatically, they are fine, but other than very rare occasions, the tags aren’t appropriate for the direct dialogue. Make sure what you write matches.

Modifiers Don’t Match the Dialogue

Some people really love using modifying phrases (participial phrases) with their dialogue tags. Again, I’m not against this, but like anything, it can be overused, and more than that, it needs to make sense. A modifying phrase after a dialogue tag is adding information to the dialogue tag. It works as an adjective. Here is a fine example.

“Do you ever sunburn?” Manny asked, squeezing sunscreen into his palm

“Squeezing sunscreen into his palm” is a modifying phrase–it adds information to “Manny asked.” Because it functions similar to an adjective, it’s also saying that Manny squeezed the sunscreen into his palm at the same time he asked “Do you ever sunburn.” Not after. The same time.

Here is a problem example:

“Grab the gun!” I yelled, holding my breath as a cloud of smoke came our way.

You cannot yell and hold your breath at the same time. So this is a problem. But you can easily fix it:

“Grab the gun!” I yelled, then held my breath as a cloud of smoke came our way.

“Grab the gun!” I yelled. I held my breath as a cloud of smoke came our way.

“Grab the gun!” I yelled, and I held my breath as a cloud of smoke came our way.

But NEVER

“Grab the gun!” I yelled, holding my breath as a cloud of smoke came our way.

Other times, the participial phrase doesn’t match because it doesn’t fit with the dialogue (usually it doesn’t logically match in length).

“Yes,” she said, putting her dress, socks, and pajamas in a suitcase and then the luggage on the floor.

You can’t tell me she put her dress, socks, AND pajamas in a suitcase AND then put the luggage on the floor the same time she said “Yes.” Unless she’s Quicksilver from X-Men, it’s not possible to do all those things during a one-syllable word.

You can fix it like this:

“Yes,” she said, putting her dress in the suitcase. She added her socks and pajamas, and then placed the luggage on the floor.

Some writers say you should try to leave out participial phrases like this altogether, since cognitively it is difficult for the reader to imagine both things happening at once. I’m personally okay with it and don’t think it’s a big deal. They just need to make sense.

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sleepynervewriting · 2 years ago

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How to write dynamic scenes

Here’s how you can inject some dynamics into your scenes where characters may be idling during their conversations! This is my favourite trick to use when I want to round out a scene.

Sometimes you may have a static scene in your book with characters simply sitting and chatting. So how do you make this more interesting?

The answer is to add in some dynamics!

🤔 What does that mean?

Creating dynamics in a scene means that you add some form of repetitive or changing background element throughout the scene to keep it moving, despite it being in the same spot.

For example, if you have a scene set in a restaurant with two characters having dinner, pick out an element from the setting that could create some kind of dynamic, pressure or conflict to your scene.

✍️ In a restaurant this may be:

An annoying cast of waiters circling around and offering refills

A scorching radiator by the side of the table raising temperature and shortening patience levels

A loud party of people in the background who make it difficult for your characters to understand each other

A partner’s phone buzzing on the table every other minute

A character’s personal tendencies - like fidgeting with the table cloth and eventually unthreading it, or coming close to dropping things until they shatter a glass at a high point of the scene

Think of background elements, or ways to externalise the way your characters are feeling in a particular scene can add so much life to a scene!

It also makes it feel more interesting, dynamic, and immersive, even a scene you’re writing is a simple conversation.

Whenever you find your characters having a conversation while they’re simply walking or sitting, think of whether you can externalise any of their emotions or inject some background element to make the scene more interesting!

Did you hear my first book is coming out August 15th? Pre-order it now through the [link here] or below!

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sleepynervewriting · 2 years ago

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Writing Tips

Punctuating Dialogue

✧

➸ “This is a sentence.”

➸ “This is a sentence with a dialogue tag at the end,” she said.

➸ “This,” he said, “is a sentence split by a dialogue tag.”

➸ “This is a sentence,” she said. “This is a new sentence. New sentences are capitalized.”

➸ “This is a sentence followed by an action.” He stood. “They are separate sentences because he did not speak by standing.”

➸ She said, “Use a comma to introduce dialogue. The quote is capitalized when the dialogue tag is at the beginning.”

➸ “Use a comma when a dialogue tag follows a quote,” he said.

“Unless there is a question mark?” she asked.

“Or an exclamation point!” he answered. “The dialogue tag still remains uncapitalized because it’s not truly the end of the sentence.”

➸ “Periods and commas should be inside closing quotations.”

➸ “Hey!” she shouted, “Sometimes exclamation points are inside quotations.”

However, if it’s not dialogue exclamation points can also be “outside”!

➸ “Does this apply to question marks too?” he asked.

If it’s not dialogue, can question marks be “outside”? (Yes, they can.)

➸ “This applies to dashes too. Inside quotations dashes typically express—“

“Interruption” — but there are situations dashes may be outside.

➸ “You’ll notice that exclamation marks, question marks, and dashes do not have a comma after them. Ellipses don’t have a comma after them either…” she said.

➸ “My teacher said, ‘Use single quotation marks when quoting within dialogue.’”

➸ “Use paragraph breaks to indicate a new speaker,” he said.

“The readers will know it’s someone else speaking.”

➸ “If it’s the same speaker but different paragraph, keep the closing quotation off.

“This shows it’s the same character continuing to speak.”

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sleepynervewriting · 2 years ago

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How should I go about describing a character who goes through a lot, becoming more disheveled and desperate as the plot goes on?

Desperation is the emotion that drives characters to their limits, leading to their most intense and extreme behaviours.

By showing how characters become more desperate as your plot progresses, you can create characters that are interesting, dynamic, and relatable.

Here are some ways you can show desperation in your characters. As the plot moves forward, these elements can get worse, showing their decline.

How do they behave?

Obsessive and/or compulsive

Repetitive actions like hand wringing, or overuse of stock phrases

Self-destructive and risk-seeking

Enhanced aggression

Avoidant and isolationist

Manipulative

Exploitative

Short-tempered

Impulsive decision-making

Unrelenting pursuit of something

What physical signs do they show?

Heart palpitations and short, rapid breathing

Sweating profusely

Shaking or trembling

Sudden onset of nausea

Feeling weak or dizzy

Muscle tension

Headaches

Insomnia caused by worry and stress

Feelings of fatigue

Stomach pain and cramping

How do they interact?

Begging or pleading with others

Manipulating others to get what they want

Increasing paranoia and questioning other's motives

Pushing away loved ones

Becoming overly clingy

Either an inability to trust or being too quick to trust others

Self-sabotage

Single-focus conversations

What do they look like?

Unkempt hair and poor hygiene

Rumpled, slept-in clothing

Nervous tics, like fidgeting, pacing, or picking at nails

Extreme and unexplained weight loss

A haunted, faraway, or panicked look

Dark-rimmed, bruised eyes from lack of sleep or exhaustion

A constant sheen of sweat and clammy skin

Unusual clothing choices

What body language do they display?

Hunching over, as if trying to protect themselves

Fidgeting or pacing

Avoiding eye contact

Clenching fists or grinding teeth

Sweating or shaking

Staring intently at something

Repeatedly touching hair or face

Darting eyes and biting lips

Meek and under-confident stance

Pleading look

What is their attitude?

Feeling hopelessness

Sad and dejected

Becoming increasingly irrational

A loss of faith in themselves and others

Obsession to the point of resorting to extreme measures

A sense of helplessness

Blaming others

Feeling powerless

A sense of urgency

What are some positive things that can come out of desperation?

Increased motivation to achieve their goals or solve their problems

Resilience and adaptability in the face of adversity

Heightened creativity and resourcefulness

The ability to form deep and meaningful connections with those who share their struggles

Catharsis or character growth through their struggles

What are some negative things that can come out of desperation?

A tendency to become self-destructive or engage in risky behaviour

Difficulty forming and maintaining healthy relationships

Increased isolation or loneliness

Chronic stress and physical health problems

A tendency to make impulsive or irrational decisions

Prone to depression and anxiety

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sleepynervewriting · 2 years ago

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The reason your outline doesn’t work

Here’s why your outline may not be working for you. You get to a certain point in your novel and it just doesn’t feel right anymore, and the story is no longer fun to write…

Have you ever gotten to a certain point in your book and realized your outline isn’t working anymore?

This might be the reason →

Your characters have woken up and taken over!

Yes, this happens often to many-a writers, and that makes it difficult to enforce a plot that just doesn’t work anymore.

So how do you fix this?

Listen to your characters. If you’ve put the work into them and they’re strong enough to know their own mind, that means you’re very unlikely to go wrong by listening to them.

And your outline?

Your outline should always be treated as a living document.

The outline and the plot is something you should be flexible with changing in order to serve your characters and the purpose of their story.

Because, remember - it is their story.

Pick up my 3 extensive workbooks for writers, with dozens of fully-customisable templates.

Grab The Writer's Toolboox through the [link here] or below!

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sleepynervewriting · 2 years ago

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Show Don't Tell: Happiness

And now, for the moment you've all been waiting for... drum roll, please! We're diving into the emotion of happiness in today's post of my 'Show don't Tell: Emotions' series. If you're a regular, welcome back! And if you're new here, a warm welcome to you, my dear!

Today's topic is happiness.

Happiness is such a wonderful feeling! It brings us pleasure, contentment, and joy, and often leaves us with a sense of well-being and satisfaction with life. In creative writing, happiness can be a powerful tool to convey positivity and hope, to contrast with darker emotions, or to create a satisfying resolution.

If you want to show happiness in your writing, there are many effective ways to do so. One of the most obvious ways is through your characters' body language. They can jump for joy, laugh brightly, or even have a smile so wide it hurts their cheeks!

Smile broadly or grin from ear to ear

Laugh or giggle

Jump or skip with joy

Clap hands or fist pump

Hug or high-five someone

Dance or sway to music

Stand up straighter or raise their head

Bounce on their toes or wiggle in excitement

Open their arms wide

Lean in towards someone or something

Have a relaxed posture and open gestures

Tilt their head back or close their eyes in pleasure

Breathe deeply and exhale with a sigh of contentment

Rub their hands together in glee

Raise their eyebrows in excitement

Twirl around or spin

Skip or hop

Shrug their shoulders in delight

Tap their feet or fingers in rhythm

Squint or close their eyes in pleasure

Nod their head enthusiastically

Sway or rock back and forth

Fist pump or air punch

Squeal or shriek with joy

Playfully nudge or poke someone

Flap their hands in excitement

Jump up and down

Do a little dance or shimmy

Hold their hands up in victory

Clap or cheer loudly

Open their mouth in surprise or delight

Rub their stomach or pat their heart

Touch their face or hair

Hug themselves or wrap their arms around their body

Toss their head back in laughter

Swing their arms or hold them out wide

Skip or hop on one foot

Lean in towards someone or something

Exaggerate facial expressions (e.g., widen eyes, grin widely)

Whistle or hum a tune

Make a thumbs-up gesture

Squirm or wriggle with pleasure

Hold hands with someone or link arms

Let's put it this way: the body isn't the only way for authors to convey their characters' emotions. Sensory details are a powerful tool to immerse readers in a character's world. By describing what they see, hear, taste, smell, and feel, we can bring readers into the character's experience. But we need to go beyond surface-level sensations and capture what the character feels on the inside as well.

Smiling widely or grinning from ear to ear

Laughing heartily or giggling uncontrollably

Dancing, skipping, or jumping with joy

Humming or singing a happy tune

Taking deep breaths and exhaling contentedly

Feeling a warm and fuzzy sensation in their chest or stomach

Savoring the taste of a delicious food or drink

Noticing the vibrant colors and beauty of their surroundings

Feeling the sun on their skin or the breeze in their hair

Hearing the sound of birds chirping or children playing in the distance

Feeling a sense of lightness or buoyancy in their body

Experiencing a tingling or ticklish sensation

Jumping up and down or bouncing on their toes

Clapping their hands or hugging someone tightly

Closing their eyes and smiling serenely

Feeling a rush of energy or excitement

Noticing pleasant scents, like flowers or fresh-baked cookies

Tasting the sweetness of fruit or candy

Feeling the softness of a plush toy or blanket

Running their fingers through sand or grass

Hearing the sound of a favorite song or musician

Watching a beloved movie or TV show

Feeling the coolness of a refreshing drink or ice cream

Taking in the beauty of a sunset or sunrise

Enjoying the sensation of being hugged or cuddled

Noticing the warmth of a loved one's touch or embrace

Feeling a sense of accomplishment or pride

Basking in the glow of positive feedback or compliments

Feeling a sense of relief or release from stress

Being immersed in a favorite hobby or activity

Feeling a sense of connection with others

Noticing the sparkle in someone's eyes or the curve of their smile

Feeling the rush of wind on a rollercoaster or other thrilling ride

Enjoying the sensation of swimming or floating in water

Feeling the comforting weight of a pet or stuffed animal on their lap

Hearing the sound of a baby's laughter or a friend's joke

Smelling the aroma of a delicious meal or favorite comfort food

Feeling the texture of a favorite fabric, like silk or cashmere

Noticing the beauty of art, like a painting or sculpture

Enjoying the sensation of being outside in nature, like hiking or camping.

Continuing on from our discussion on sensory detail, our next topic is all about action! The way a character moves and interacts with their surroundings can be a great way to show their emotions, including happiness. You might notice some overlap with our previous discussion on body language, as the two often work hand in hand.

Smiling or grinning widely

Laughing or giggling

Jumping up and down or dancing

Hugging or kissing someone

High-fiving or fist-bumping

Skipping or running

Singing or humming a happy tune

Whistling or clapping their hands

Doing something they love, such as playing music or painting

Sharing good news or accomplishments with others

Showing gratitude or appreciation towards others

Offering to help or support someone in need

Expressing optimism or hope for the future

Being kind or generous to others

Taking deep breaths and feeling a sense of calm and contentment.

Doing a happy dance

Giving someone a thumbs up

Offering a high-pitched, cheerful greeting

Whipping out a camera or phone to take a picture

Whipping out a camera or phone to take a selfie

Leaning forward with a big grin

Widening the eyes in joy and excitement

Throwing their arms out wide in exuberance

Doing a victory pose with fists in the air

Nodding and smiling with a sense of approval

Having a bright and lively conversation with others

Celebrating by popping a bottle of champagne or soda

Pumping fists in the air or chest-bumping

Cheering or clapping excitedly for someone or something

Staring off into the distance with a contented smile

Taking a deep breath and letting out a sigh of relief and satisfaction

Walking with a spring in their step

Picking flowers or enjoying nature

Baking or cooking a special treat for someone

Telling jokes or sharing humorous anecdotes

Giving someone a warm hug or a pat on the back

Sitting in a comfortable chair with a relaxed smile

Expressing genuine interest and curiosity in someone or something

Offering a comforting presence or a listening ear

Sharing a happy memory or personal achievement

Gazing lovingly at a significant other or family member

Taking part in a fun and engaging activity with others

Expressing excitement and anticipation for a future event or experience

Giving someone a playful nudge or wink

Let's dive into the topic of setting! It's more than just a physical space for your characters to exist in, it's about how they interact with it and react to it. The location, the scenery, and your character's responses to them can all be powerful tools to convey their emotions, including happiness.

Skipping, jumping or running around

Smiling or laughing while enjoying the scenery

Engaging in activities that bring them joy, such as playing music or reading a book

Dancing, swaying or moving rhythmically to music

Taking deep breaths of fresh air or savoring the aroma of flowers or food

Hugging or kissing loved ones, or expressing affection to pets

Participating in outdoor activities, such as swimming or hiking, with enthusiasm

Noticing and appreciating the beauty of the setting, such as the colors of a sunset or the intricate patterns in a forest

Expressing gratitude or excitement about an event or opportunity in the setting

Engaging in playful or lighthearted banter with others, demonstrating a sense of ease and joy

Basking in the warmth of the sun or feeling the coolness of a breeze

Indulging in a favorite treat or drink, such as ice cream or hot chocolate

Spending time with animals, either domestic or wild, and showing delight in their company

Expressing wonder and awe at the majesty of natural wonders, such as waterfalls or mountains

Engaging in physical activity with enthusiasm, such as playing sports or dancing

Enjoying a picnic or outdoor meal with loved ones

Taking part in a community event or celebration with excitement

Taking time to appreciate small details in the environment, such as the sound of birds singing or the rustling of leaves

Making art or taking photographs to capture the beauty of the setting

Connecting with others through shared experiences in the setting, such as storytelling or singing around a campfire

Feeling a sense of accomplishment or pride in overcoming a challenge in the setting, such as climbing a difficult trail or completing a scavenger hunt

Smiling or expressing joy at the sight of familiar landmarks or locations

Taking time to relax or meditate in a peaceful environment, such as a garden or park

Engaging in creative activities, such as writing or painting, to express their happiness

Expressing gratitude or appreciation for the people and experiences in the setting

Showing excitement or anticipation for future adventures or experiences in the setting

Taking part in cultural or historical activities that evoke a sense of happiness and pride

Playing games or engaging in playful activities with friends or family

Have you ever noticed how a sunny day, singing birds, and blooming flowers can instantly uplift your mood? The same effect applies to the settings/location in your story. Even without a character present, the scenery can influence the readers' perception of the mood. It's relatively easy to convey happiness through the scenery by incorporating bright and beautiful elements.

Weather: Sunny skies, clear blue skies, and warm temperatures can create a cheerful and happy atmosphere.

Time of Day: Early morning or midday can create a bright and positive atmosphere.

Location: A park or a beach can create a sense of happiness and relaxation.

Objects: Brightly colored or playful objects can indicate a character's happiness and joy.

Colors: Bright or pastel colors like pink or yellow can be used to create a sense of happiness.

Noises: Soft and melodic sounds like birds chirping or soft music can create a sense of happiness and calm.

Crowds: A lively and bustling environment, such as a festival or concert, can be used to create feelings of happiness and excitement.

Architecture: Warm and inviting environments like a cozy home or a charming cafe can create a sense of happiness and comfort.

Nature: A lush and verdant landscape can create a sense of happiness and contentment. Animals: Playful or affectionate animals can be used to create a sense of joy and happiness.

Hey, now we get to dive into some dialogue! It's a fantastic tool to showcase emotions, especially happiness. Your characters' tone of voice, choice of words, and how they deliver those words can all capture their happiness in a stunning way.

Using positive and cheerful language, such as "great," "fantastic," or "wonderful."

Laughing or chuckling at appropriate moments in conversation.

Expressing gratitude or appreciation for a situation or person.

Sharing good news with others and being excited about it.

Using exclamation points or emojis to show enthusiasm.

Using playful or teasing language with loved ones or close friends.

Asking others about their own happy experiences or memories.

Complimenting others on their accomplishments or actions.

Using endearments or affectionate language with loved ones.

Offering to help others with a task or problem in a cheerful manner.

Smiling frequently during conversation.

Using a lively and upbeat tone of voice.

Engaging in friendly banter or teasing with others.

Using positive affirmations, such as "I'm so lucky" or "Everything is going well."

Recalling happy memories or experiences.

Expressing optimism about the future.

Showing interest and enthusiasm for others' interests and hobbies.

Being open and receptive to new experiences.

Offering words of encouragement or support to others.

Displaying physical affection, such as hugging or high-fiving.

Speaking in a fast and energetic manner.

Showing a willingness to help others.

Being playful or silly with friends or family.

Making jokes or using humor in conversation.

Engaging in activities or hobbies that bring joy.

Saying "thank you" often and with genuine appreciation.

Expressing excitement about upcoming events or plans.

Using positive self-talk and focusing on personal strengths and accomplishments.

Expressing love and affection to significant others or family members.

Being generous with compliments and praise towards others.

And after all that, you get to delve into your character's mind and showcase their thoughts and core feelings, which can reveal their happiness. Expressing a character's thoughts is a great way to convey happiness in creative writing. It allows readers to get a closer look at the character's emotions and makes for a more intimate reading experience. When a writer reveals a character's innermost feelings, it strengthens the connection between the reader and the character.

For instance, if a character is feeling happy, their thoughts may reflect their sense of contentment, satisfaction, and positivity. They may dwell on things that bring them joy, such as achieving a goal, having a meaningful relationship, or enjoying a beautiful sunset. By describing the character's thoughts, the writer can give the reader insight into what is making the character happy and allow them to share in that happiness.

Furthermore, a character's thoughts can be used to contrast their present happiness with past struggles or sadness. By demonstrating how the character has overcome adversity or grown as a person, the writer can create a feeling of triumph and fulfillment that adds depth to the character's happiness.

A sense of contentment and satisfaction with their life or current situation

Thoughts of gratitude or appreciation for the good things in their life

Positive self-talk, such as reminding themselves of their accomplishments or strengths

Optimistic thoughts about the future or upcoming events

Thoughts of joy or excitement over something they're looking forward to

Thoughts of love or affection towards someone they care about

Daydreaming or fantasizing about happy scenarios or possibilities

Feeling a sense of lightness or freedom in their thoughts, with fewer worries or anxieties

A sense of fulfillment or accomplishment after achieving a goal or completing a task

A desire to share their happiness with others or spread joy to those around them.

Feeling a sense of belonging or connectedness with others

Being grateful for small pleasures, like a beautiful sunset or a good cup of coffee

Feeling a sense of relief or release after overcoming a challenge or obstacle

Feeling a sense of validation or recognition for their efforts or hard work

Feeling a sense of pride in themselves or others

Reflecting on happy memories or past experiences

Feeling a sense of anticipation or excitement for upcoming events or opportunities

Feeling a sense of comfort or security in familiar surroundings or with familiar people

Feeling a sense of wonder or amazement at the world around them

Feeling a sense of accomplishment or progress towards a long-term goal

Thinking about ways to help or support others, and feeling happy at the thought of making a positive impact

Feeling a sense of peace or serenity in a quiet moment or peaceful environment

Feeling a sense of enthusiasm or passion for a particular hobby or interest

Feeling a sense of nostalgia for past experiences or happy times

Feeling a sense of connectedness to nature or the outdoors

Thinking about happy moments shared with loved ones, such as holidays or family gatherings

Feeling a sense of awe or inspiration from witnessing acts of kindness or beauty

Feeling a sense of relief or release after expressing emotions like love, forgiveness, or empathy

Feeling a sense of confidence or empowerment after overcoming fear or self-doubt

Feeling a sense of awe or gratitude towards a higher power or spiritual force.

Let's chat about metaphors and analogies, two super fun tools that can bring your writing to life and help you show your characters' joy! Just remember not to go overboard, or your readers might get tired out.

So, what are metaphors and analogies? These are literary devices that writers use to compare two different things. A metaphor says that one thing is another thing, while an analogy explains how two things are similar. These tools are perfect for creative writing because they create vivid and unforgettable images that can show happiness in a powerful and unforgettable way.

You can use metaphors and analogies to show happiness in many different ways. They can help make the emotion more tangible and real. Instead of saying "she was happy," you might write "she was like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon, filled with joy and wonder." This comparison creates an image that's much more memorable and helps the reader feel the character's happiness more deeply.

Metaphors and analogies can also be used to create contrast, which can make the happiness even more impactful. For example, you might describe a character's happiness as "a rainbow bursting through the clouds after a thunderstorm." This comparison creates a feeling of hope and joy that's made even more powerful by the contrast with the stormy setting.

"She felt like a bird released from a cage, soaring with joy."

"His heart felt like a sunflower, turning towards the light of her smile."

"The warmth of happiness spread through her like a sunrise, chasing away the darkness."

"He was as giddy as a child on Christmas morning, unable to contain his excitement."

"Her happiness bubbled up like a pot of boiling water, spilling over in laughter and smiles."

"He felt like a runner crossing the finish line, victorious and elated."

"She was a cat curled up in a sunbeam, purring with contentment."

"His happiness was a beacon, shining bright and spreading joy to all around him."

"She felt like a flower blooming in the spring, bursting with vibrant colors and life."

"His heart was a kite caught in a strong wind, soaring higher and higher with each moment of joy."

"Her happiness was a songbird, chirping a beautiful melody in her heart."

"He felt like a child with a new toy, excited and full of wonder."

"She was a butterfly emerging from a cocoon, spreading her wings and basking in the sunlight."

"His happiness was a warm hug, comforting and enveloping."

"She felt like a rainbow after a storm, bringing light and color to the world."

"His heart was a hummingbird, beating fast with joy and energy."

"She was a lighthouse, shining a beacon of happiness and hope."

"His happiness was a fountain, bubbling up and spilling over with joy."

"She felt like a puzzle piece finally finding its place, completing the picture of her life."

"His heart was a symphony, playing a beautiful melody of happiness and contentment."

"She was a shooting star, streaking across the sky and leaving a trail of happiness in her wake."

"His happiness was a warm blanket, wrapping him in comfort and peace."

"She felt like a flower blooming in a desert, defying the odds and spreading joy in a harsh environment."

"His heart was a drumbeat, pulsing with the rhythm of happiness and excitement."

"She was a bird building a nest, filled with purpose and joy in creating a home."

"His happiness was a wave, washing over him and carrying him to a place of contentment."

"She felt like a river flowing freely, unrestricted and joyful in its movement."

"His heart was a candle, glowing bright with happiness and spreading warmth to those around him."

"She was a firework exploding in the sky, lighting up the darkness with bursts of happiness and color."

"His happiness was a treasure chest, filled with priceless memories and experiences."

Thanks for reading my post today, my lovely readers! If you're new to the series, don't forget to check out my other posts on various emotions besides happiness. They're all on my Tumblr or you can find them organized a bit better here! Until next Monday!

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