sleepingguard01

[sleepingguard01]

[sleepingguard01]

love the phrase 'methinks'. me does think. thinketh me do.

[sleepingguard01]

My coworker completely misreads our maintenance guy’s vibes… he sees a big fuzzy bearded dude who works outside and thinks he must be super macho, completely missing all the bisexual tabletop gamer coding in his mannerisms. So when maintenance guy and I greet each other like high camp theatre nerds with a series of bows and flourishes and made-up titles, coworker is SO visibly confused and thinks I must have trained him to do this.

[sleepingguard01]

tiger tale toys 🐀🐁

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making a character playlist for your own enjoyment will have you putting in songs that not even a top of their class analyst could explain

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[sleepingguard01]

still sometimes think about how when my apartment got raided by cops back in 2021 i had a massive neon sign on the wall of my living room that just said "crime"

[sleepingguard01]

secret santa i did for @berrysquared

also this is a pirate au im making

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[sleepingguard01]

Giraffe leaf-rolling weevil, Paracycnotrachelus sp., Attelabidae

Photographed in Indonesia by Nicky Bay // Website // Facebook

Shared with permission; do not remove credit or re-post!

[sleepingguard01]

Hyper specific poll about me:

- has an extra tooth*

- knows someone who was in the Austin Powers movies

- broke an arm falling out of a tree as a kid

- has sewn clothes for themselves**

- almost had to get medically necessary plastic surgery as a kid***

- has milked a cow but never lived on/near a farm

- was almost choked out by a horse as a kid****

*Baby tooth never fell out, adult tooth grew in directly behind it.

**no pattern to follow, minimal sewing skills, and completely created a dress from scratch

***had an accident as a kid that severely disfigured my face. Doctors told parents I’d have to get plastic surgery if it didn’t heal (thankfully it healed fine, didn’t even scar)

****was riding a horse and had a straw hat on that had string that went around my neck. Hat caught on a low branch and the horse wouldn’t stop going forward. By the time someone helped, I had black spots in my vision.

*Baby tooth never fell out, adult tooth grew in directly behind it.

**no pattern to follow, minimal sewing skills, and completely created a dress from scratch

***had an accident as a kid that severely disfigured my face. Doctors told parents I’d have to get plastic surgery if it didn’t heal (thankfully it healed fine, didn’t even scar)

****was riding a horse and had a straw hat on that had string that went around my neck. Hat caught on a low branch and the horse wouldn’t stop going forward. By the time someone helped, I had black spots in my vision.

[sleepingguard01]

2025 let's let our swag blossom everyone

A whole field of swag flowers taking over the earth. Join me

[sleepingguard01]

*sighs, visibly frustrated* let me put this in words you can understand: meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow meow

[sleepingguard01]

ive been wanting to make smth like this for a little while now and i finally finished it up ^_^ hopefully my tricks are helpful

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just have to make sure

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i think what people tend to forget is that laughing at modern art also counts as having a dialogue with it. like as long as you're respectful of the museum space and whatnot. you are under no obligation to take any of it seriously. when i go to a modern art museum I do engage with every piece and read the blurb and think deeply/discuss its intention and its execution but it doesnt stop me from having a giggle at the ones i think are stupid. often the artist is equally aware that it may be stupid. sometimes that's the point also. it's fun!

[sleepingguard01]

bugs?? in my computer?