slatslatslats

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top played albums 2018

1. the weeknd - my dear melancholy, 2. hyukoh - 24: how to find true love and happiness 3. lulileela - rise from the ashes 4. kim sawol - romance 5. decadent - decadent 6. zion.t - zzz 7. bts - love yourself: tear 8. kid milli - ai, the playlist 9. se so neon - summer plumage

been a crazy chaotic but rad year. next year will be even better.

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came back to tumblr just to post this. i swear this is the most amazing shit i’ve ever listened to. give it a try.

DECADENT - Disease Listen to DECADENT’s first full-length album ‘Decadent’ on Apple Music.

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february is about to beat the crap out of me. assignments, translations, readings, thesis research. welp. need 24 more hours in the day.

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2018 is cool so far.

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I don’t want to date. I just want to magically end up in a long-term and emotionally-secure relationship with someone cute

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top played albums 2017

1. james vincent mcmorrow - we move 2. alina baraz & galimatias - urban flora 3. sza - ctrl 4. hyukoh - 23 5. lana del rey - lust for life 6. future islands - the far field 7. tame impala - currents 8. anderson .paak - malibu 9. grimes - art angels

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it’s been a weird year. made unforgettable memories in korea. lost mom and everything i knew. somehow made it through. found a job on top of my studies. signing my apartment contract on monday. sometimes i’m really struggling. most of the time i’m keeping myself together. weekends like these, not so much. too much time in my head, so much fear, so many doubts. i used to be so independent, now i’m longing for everyone i met back in korea, the lifestyle i grew used to, the sides of me that i could only express over there. coming home was like a second loss. i’m doing fine, but only because i’m in some sort of damage control-mode, pushing everything under until i find a safe space to vent it all out. it’s difficult. it’ll be fine. it’ll be fine. 

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sooo. i started working and i’m looking for an apartment and life is busy. feel like i have nothing to write here atm. just trying to figure out my new job and school and finances. things are starting to work themselves out which is nice, but i’m in this interim period where i’m waiting to see if i get this apartment, getting adjusted to work and trying to see what my schedule needs to look like, plus juggling everything while living in the middle of nowhere and being dependent on someone else to get places. really really hope i get this apartment so that i can move out in two weeks. really don’t want to have to wait for january or something.

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i love music. i love being able to catch my favourite bands live on the regular. i love when bands i haven’t really listened to before completely sweep me off my feet. i love the way live music strikes me in the chest. i love that there are days i get to be frustrated because my favourite bands play different venues at the same time. i hate that all i can do is pay 입장료s, shove money into 기부통s, sneak stickers, buy CDs/MP3s and hope the people i force my favourite music on like it enough to do the same. 

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on the upside, i’ve finally been able to apply for my student loan, which means i’ll be able to move out sooner rather than later. i also might have a part-time job coming up, which will be helpful. mid-terms are coming up too, i only have one of them this semester which is nice. finals will be more demanding. weather is getting colder and i’m losing weight which is cool. woo.

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i wonder when this suffocating homesickness will subside because jesus

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I MISS KOREAAAAAaaaaaaa so much

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You’ve got to be strong enough for love. It’s very easy to be cool and cynical. It’s very difficult to just let yourself go and be in love. You’ve got to be strong enough for that.

Noel Gallagher (via thelovejournals)

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I have done nothing all summer but wait for myself to be myself again.

Georgia O’Keeffe, in a letter to Russel Vernon Hunter, from Georgia O’Keeffe: Art and Letters (New York Graphic Society, 1990)

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September favs

 › yung lean - red bottom sky  › i had the best job interview with the loveliest people. my class hours clashed with their hours so i wasn’t able to take the job, unfortunately. still such a great experience.  › logic - 1-800-273-8255  › baby driver aka. best film of the year  › decadent - 산책  › cold weather and cuddling up in my scarf  › my nexus 5x broke so i ended up eventually getting a g6 and i like it a lot. not as good as the nexus 5, but. i don’t have the money for a pixel phone so i’m very happy with this.    › i’ve been working once a week for the past month and it’s been pretty great. even though it’s just an extra job with short hours i enjoy it a lot. have another job with more hours coming up this month that i’m really excited about.

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finding it reeeally difficult to find back to a good place in life. i keep putting off my schoolwork, it doesn’t engage me in any way. spend most of my time not really doing much of anything. i’ve been trying to get back to translating hyukoh interviews, but it’s difficult for me to focus so i give up fast. i found some fun people to talk to on tinder, but it’s difficult to keep up conversations. my phone broke, i’m using my sister’s for now but i haven’t even bothered installing the app. i don’t feel like responding to any messages i get. i’ve lost weight which is nice, but it’s because i’ve lost my appetite. i sleep half day, have breakfast at noon and maybe eat something small in the evening. i have no sense of time. don’t feel like listening to music. tuesdays (class), wednesdays (work) and thursdays (class) are the highlights of my week. the other day i was going through the little trinkets and things i had brought with me from korea and felt so reenergised from thinking of all the good times. the energy didn’t last. i revived my 1 paragraph diary again, i don’t really have the energy to write longer texts. i finished a short book, finding it very difficult to motivate myself to turn pages. i did finally send in all of my papers to get my exchange study credits accounted for at uni, just waiting for it to get registered so that i can apply for my student loan. i really just want to get it over with so that i can move as soon as possible. i’m also getting my new phone in a few days, and i’m excited for that. and i watched baby driver yesterday, fell in love with it. really just feeling terribly unmotivated in life right now. but anyhow. tonight is the night i put on jhene’s new album and dealing with this schoolwork before the day of hand-in, for once.

[slatslatslats]

august favs

› hinako note › sagrada reset › job interviews n shit. still no long-term job though, which kinda sucks. but now i’m helping a family out with one of their kids once a week which is super fun and great! › billie eilish - watch › school started, going to class is great but schoolwork sucks. and i still have no idea what to write about for my thesis this spring. heeeelp.

all of august was super lackluster. felt down a lot, missed korea a lot. ughh.