skypaul

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Can YOU claim to be perched atop the slippery slope that leads to human-pillow marriage? No? Then SHUT UP.

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Dreaming of writing with baseball dirt? Wake up & try this!

CAUTION: dirt is an unreliable ink surrogate

[skypaul]

Does anyone really care about you? Use our Mega Eye-Contact-Breaker™ at your next dinner party & find out!

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Own the poster that officially drove a phrase into the ground! "Wine over" to your credit card now!

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The popular rainy-day game "Which One Is A Dog Again?" leaps off of the board and into real life!

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Holds the precise amount of wine needed to drink yourself into feeling certain that you have good taste!

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Your humiliations at attempting to fly a kite on calm days are over! Fly a kite ANY time, with StiffKite!™

[skypaul]

The perfect gift for that person in your life who won't shut up about Black Mirror, probably!

[skypaul]

Stupid AND pretentious? Good news-- the LitLamp™ reads books FOR you!

*lamp cannot share contents of book 

[skypaul]

The death of a pet allows us to take our presumptions of their affections for us to the next level!

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Play chess as they did in olden times, when one player was forbidden access to the board & driven insane!

[skypaul]

Just one night cuddling with the Breathstealerz™ will teach your child valuable lessons about fear!

[skypaul]

IMPORTANT: For display purposes only. Upon giving, remind recipient that some food-shaped things are not food.

[skypaul]

WILL SOMEONE PLEASE BUY ONE OF THESE FUCKING THINGS ALREADY I MEAN GODDAMMIT

2013

[skypaul]

Soon our consciousnesses will all live online, overseen by Kate Hudson. Maybe buy her a mug or something!

2013

[skypaul]

Clinically proven! Put this money belt on your head and be transformed into Debbie Gibson! 

2013

[skypaul]

No sense of humor? Love explaining things? Hate being understood? Here's a shirt for you! You make me sad!

2013