People who don’t like pineapple on pizza are the minority and don’t realize it
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No sleep aid is wild I need the hat man to knock me out with a golf club
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please please please remember that no matter what your manager says, it is never that serious. unless you are literally performing surgery or defusing a bomb, it simply is not that serious
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“Do you want to go into deep sea or space?” NEITHER the Lord made me of and for the dirt.
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bees?
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hey, don’t cry. one half flour one half yogurt knead into dough and fry for easy flatbread and dip in balsamic vinegar, okay?
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can I get a job as an editor but the only thing I do is correct when someone uses the word "prone" when they mean "supine"
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im not a very patriotic woman but i nonetheless whole-heartedly support every drive-through employee’s constitutional right to be blazed out of their fuckin gourd
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tiktok is such an awful app, it's almost designed to feed you misinformation and expose you to insane discourse. unlike beloved tumblr, the app that feeds me misinformation and exposes me to insane discourse
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That’s really funny because
Not what I expected coming from John Green
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