single30smumtobeviaspermdon-blog

[single30smumtobeviaspermdon-blog]

This Is Me -33,Single,Mummy to be Via Sperm Donor.

So today is my first ever blog post. So I will introduce myself and why I wanted to start a blog.

My name is Jessica, I’m 34 this year,been single for the past 8 years. I’ve dated guys here and there but never anything long term,my friends would say I was a “ProActive Dater” and I  always seem to be the one who gets burnt, I’m finding the guys I’ve met dont really wanna settle down,or just be dating just me, or they have been married or in a long term relationship,had kids and dont want anymore. So it leaves me to where I am now?

When I was 26, I was told I had the early signs of cervical cancer,at the time I was recently single after a 6 year relationship ended, I felt my whole world would be over, as only the year before my mum was diagnosed with stage 4 mestactic breast cancer and was only given 18 months to live

.After 7 years of surgerys,check ups every 3-6 months then being told I may not ever have children, I could never get too “clucky” as I didnt want to get my hopes up.It wasnt until October 2018 I got my results back after a 12 mth clearance to be told, its completly gone...The shock and emotion I had at the time I broke down and cryed with joy as I never thought this rollercoaster would end and my specialist did tell me if it came back,It would have resulted in a hysterectomy.I felt it was a gift from my mother,(She lost her battle to cancer in July 2017,after 7.5 yrs fighting)

You could say after I walked out of the doctors surgery that day, I walked out with a new lease on life, I started to think more about the future and what I wanted for myself. I became clucky and thinking to myself wow I can become a mum.. But I’m 33 and single and nothing on the horizon and just tired of dating,the lies and bullshit you have to go through.So I was thinking alot of friends who are married with kids,ones who are single parents on there own and doing it well and looking at the chance of doing IVF.

I was telling an old time friend about my plans to be a mum and was looking at doing IVF, then she had told me about a Australian site a friend of hers is on where there are donors willing to help people out. Her friend is in the process atm. So I added the site. I also remember seeing on tv a few yrs ago this site helping people becoming parents. I joined the group seen what people write or donors wanting to offer there help  etc. It amazed me really, there are kind people out there willing to help peoples dreams of parenthood come true.

So a few weeks past,my holiday to Bali on my own came up, this was my chance to relax and really think if I’m gonna do this and also cause my depo shot was now due (contraceptive). I weighed up the Pro’s and Con’s and decided Lets do this, I’ll be 40 by the time Mr Right may show up and sweep me off my feet then it will be too late to start a family for me. Plus I’m just done with dating right now.Whilst I was away I was scrolling the doner site etc and I happened to see a doner ad which caught my attention. Hes new to the whole thing as am I . I wrote a comment on his ad and said, I’d be looking at the end of the year, as I’m waitng for the depo to wear off and get periods again etc. I really didn’t think I’d get a reply as it seems to far away and there were already comments to him.

I woke up the next day and BOOM..There was a reply from the donor to my email,saying he would be interested to help possibly and wanted to know more about me etc and care to chat. I couldnt believe I got a reply, He told me he had over 10 offers and He only wants to donate twice. I didnt know how my chances would be really..After a few days of chatting and expectations of how it will be done etc,he told me he wanted to help out. It all has fallen into my lap easily so far.So its been 5 weeks since I’ve come off my contraceptive and feeling all the withdrawal symtoms.After being on the depo shot on and off over 10 yrs I havent had a period for 3 years, so now its the waiting process at the moment. I have been reading womens post to help get your body on track so I’ve just started taking a pregnancy tablet to take daily to help me along and get my body ready. And I’ll be booking in to see my doctor to let them know about my future plans and see how everything looks.

So I’ve told some close friends and a few work people my plan and desires of being a mum and how I’m going to do this by a sperm donor. Alot have been positive and supportive,I have a great friend network around me, but there has been a couple who have there own veiws, some are set in old school ways thinking you have to be married and be 2 parents to have a baby,some are weirded out with the way I’m going to do this with someone I don’t know or just seeing if I’m ready for this journey? I think some also forget how old I actually am?

The reason why I chose to do it this way via a donor is because my child will have the name of the person who helped me create them,not just from a lab where you get very limited information on doners. I also will be going to meet the donor soon and catch up and make sure he’s the right fit and has the same intentions as I do. I have a friend who will come and give me there advice too. Soo thats everything in the works and is up to date as of now, so I will post when I have updates and journey progress. 

I really just wanted to do a blog to help not only myself but also women in the same positon,where there single and wanting to be a mum and are gonna do it on there own via sperm donor and show yes they can do it on there own and do a damn good job.

This will be on my progress and also on life as my days are never to dull

Till next time :) Stay Tuned!