@siflooping's narstypost acct. 26 yrs young. he/they. feel free to draw/write stuff based on shit i say if it inspires you! i follow from @effrayvescent
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ive been meaning to yap abt this forever but in my minds eye heres what i think everyones sexytime prefs are:
sif: switch with a preference for subbing specifically only bc of his Neuroses (terrified of being a Bad Person or Manipulating Others) and would otherwise be chill w either. vers with no particular preference 👍🏽
loop: very heavily dom leaning switch. tbh idt theyd be comfortable w subbing for anyone but sif for a whiiile. its a feature locked behind a certain social link rank <3 also vers with no preference 👍🏽
isa: this is a sub. this is in fact THE sub. sorry i literally cant imagine him actively enjoying domming ever unless asked to and even then he's only enjoying it bc hes getting a good grade at sex. vers also
odile: This Is A Dom Top. shes tried out all configurations and genuinely enjoys this best so she sticks with it
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make no mistake. i'll be the first to point out how manipulative, insidious, and intelligent king isat is. however put me in a room with him for a couple hours and i could break him mind and soul so thoroughly he'd wish mira had vaporized him instead
#i dont even mean this sexually. super uninterested in fucking him.#however i love a challenge and he'd be a fun project. he wouldnt be easy to take apart piece by piece like sif#you'd have to be clever and creative about it but it'd definitely be possible#idk if itd be more fun to turn him into a broken shell of a person or into a well-trained dog but either would be fun projects#this is only on my nsfb bc im aware im abnormal <3#king#another hot post from me!
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i want. to hug siffrin gently but firmly. and stroke his hair while he sits on my lap. gosh
#'why is this on the nsfb' im shy. this is literally more embarrassing than detailing how i want to ruin their hole irreparably#another hot post from me!
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ok anon again because I've ended up with brain worms to an insane degree about the concepts we've been discussing but im also shy and don't wanna create a hornyposting acct to cope with it so you get to be the recipient of my gorgeously unhinged rambles now. enjoy
so you talked abt king potentially getting sif to the point where he could hurt them and have them thank them for it. & ive been thinking kinda about how that might happen in particular rather than just "okay king puts sif through the psychological torment nexus slowly and carefully until he's 100% dependent." that's cool and all but we need specifics. we need freakmatchinggggg
and like. okay. sit down w me and hold my hand. i talked before about how getting siffrin into this dependent mindset is easymode because about 90% of the work has already been done due to siffrin psychological issues. i think the same goes for this actually.
bc regardless of how much siffrin has to work to reshape his entire personality around this dude (and he does and will work for it!) the concept of having king want him on this somewhat unconditional level despite all of siffrins perceived flaws... he'd have trouble with that. it would cause cognitive dissonance. it would make him feel secure in some ways, too, but he's already got so many issues even dealing with the concept of "earned" love that having this bottomless pit of absolute wanting just suddenly thrust upon him without warning would fuck with his head. even all the work he does to be exactly what the king wants would not ever make him feel like he's done enough to earn that kind of desire.
and they're already prone to self punishing behaviors even before all That Timeloop Shit happens (i think a Lot abt how in act 2?!!! siffrin fucks up a lil in front of their friends and goes "i gotta loop back" AKA KILL THEMELF????? fella you're not even IN the torture cube yet how are you already like this) and just general feeling like they've gotta Earn It if ppl like them
so even barring my take that sif has a bighugemassive masochist streak for sex stuff it might come as an incredible relief to him if king started hurting him in response to his perceived fuckups. in his mind he's finally getting what he deserves. there's someone who cares enough to notice those flaws and deliver him the pain he deserves. and for a while afterwards, he can deal with being treated affectionately with zero cognitive dissonance, because he feels like he's earned it. he'll start spiraling again fast if he continues to be treated niceys without any intermittent cruelty but as long as there's consistent rules to follow - a consistent script he's been given, lol - he'll be able to cope with the scary scary scary concept that someone has this unconditional possessive attachment for him.
typing this all out... I've already said multiple times that this is so easymode for king but it just IS!!! ITS CRAZY!! HE WOULDN'T HAVE TO EVEN LIFT A FINGER! JUST CONTINUAL APPLICATION OF BARE MINIMUM ASS ATTENTION AND AFFECTION WHILE OCCASIONALLY IMPLYING THAT HE WANTS SIFFRIN TO DO CERTAIN THINGS WOULD BE ENOUGH!!! SIFFRIN WILL DO LITERALLY ALL THE LEGWORK HERE! HE CAN JUST SIT BACK ON HIS LITTLE SADIST THRONE AND WATCH THEM PSYCHOLOGICALLY TORTURE THEMSELF! ANYTHING ELSE HE DID WOULD JUST BE A BONUS! they're such a fucking nightmare of a pairing I'm truly obsessed. lets fuck up this rogue in ways never invented before on this earth
can we get married platonically
fr tho this is perfect no notes. i agree 100% with everything u said this is very much a match made in the depths of hell. its like combining ammonia and bleach in a poorly ventilated basement room and brother? im huffing those fumes out of a paper bag. the only thing that would improve this kingedfrin imo would be to find a way for sif to make king even worse. most likely not on purpose but itd be interesting and just as importantly funny if it was.
i want them to evolve from weird codependent couple in their honeymoon phase to the most toxic couple on earth to the physical manifestation of the mountain goats no children song. the party arrives to defeat the king but they witness him and siffrin interacting for less than 3 minutes and they're like. hey besties um can we interest you in a divorce. please. we can fight to the death after. its just that we as a party really feel like a divorce would be beneficial to all parties here. the PRETEEN can tell you guys need a divorce and they still think actors in plays have paper between them when they kiss. please
#im a clown but i do mean it i hard agree w everything you said. love love love#also u can send me a dm on here or like give me ur discord so i can add you if you would like to be insane together on purpose faster#up to u tho! this is also very fun and we get to put the brainrot out there <3#kingedfrin anon#another hot ask from someone!#kingedfrin
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ok now that thats out of my system i can focus on my Other brainworms: siffedloop body worship + edging combo to achieve the ultimate fantasy: making sif AND loop be honest about their likes and desires
#i only have 2 settings: cenobite and guy who wont hold hands before marriage#another hot post from me!
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doing this to siffrin on every level
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can i be so real with you. ok so first of all. i do think a siffedrin who's already a masochist is fun and sexy and has a lot of potential vis a vis kink discovery and exploration. however. the hottest thing imaginable To Me is for him to start off genuinely not being a masochist at all in the slightest and being trained/conditioned so thoroughly that he'd make the cenobites scared. ok im putting a readmore now cuz im shy teehee
it'd be soo easy with his insane people-pleasing tendencies and eagerness to ignore/push through their pain esp if they think they can help/please someone by doing so. personally i think itd be fun for a hypothetical sadist dom thats definitely not a projection of me to actively edge him for hours on end without letting them cum at the end. followed by passively edging him for days by making it clear that he's not allowed to touch themselves or cum unless their dom allows them. though of course they'd still be feeling up / teasing sif just enough to keep them simmering the whole time.
if he's good, he gets to go through another long active edging session at the end of which they are allowed to cum! but only if he begs be hurt, and only if the dom is simultaneously inflicting some kind of pain on them. they'd prolly do anything for any kind of release at that point esp since he figures he can handle pain even if they dont necessarily like it. and of course this means he's forced to nut over and over until he's sobbing and on the edge of passing out from overstimulation. then they get lots and lots of tender loving aftercare, affection, and compliments for being so good because he deserves it ❤️ and also to strengthen the association between pleasure and being hurt/in pain of course. wrt to the type of hurting i think u could start off small (spanking, rough biting, hair pulling, etc) then escalate more and more! rinse and repeat of this with more and more extreme stuff while making sure that they only get to cum when theyre in pain and you could get him to the point that if you slap him in the face he'd cum a little on the spot. and of course be unable to cum no matter how much or well they're being touched if they're not also being hurt. do you see my vision
#rattling the bars of my cage. sif you have awakened something so wretched and foul within me#like ive always been a sadist but nowhere near this degree. i NEED to hurt this thing#another hot post from me!#i dont rly know what to cw/tw tag this with tbh. considering this would be a consensual pre-planned scenario all parties agree to#violence cw#ig?? idk lmk if i should add anything
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anon back again. wrt what you said abt king not using sifs name except during that scene. you could spin it to where in this au he only EVER uses their name as a form of discipline. their name is a sign that they've drifted from their shared home, that they've chosen to be someone else, that they've forgotten who they used to be. he would only ever use it to remind them that they're not behaving as they should & not being who he wants them to be. eventually they'd develop an association that having a name and identity at all outside of him is bad ❤️
YOUR MIND!!!!!! its the size of god. i AM adapting this into my belief system. sif is already prone to shaping his personality traits and behavior to people-please in canon and has So Many identity issues. king absolutely can make that thang invent identity issues akin to shrimp colors using our fun and innovative tactics 👍🏽
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ooooooh, bright one..... the armour stays on........ guiajef i love kingedfrin sssiaur much. so fucked up, s ocuh in common they shoudl def fecuk. emonationyhll manipulatif kingeg truther he would fukc htem up so badd. he shoudl. itd be hot. ien dd them beggin and htnkaign him fofr scraps of attentin. i want that rogue meantlaly olbliterated.
god you are so right. genuinely the cuteness aggression sif has induced in me is like werewolf on a full moon degree and well. ok ik im hornyposting but like its not fun if its not in character and i think king is like. the one and only isat that's Actually sadistic to the extremely unethical degree i enjoy and want to see. so he's the one im projecting all my cute aggression into. helps that he's a huge cruel twisted bitch in canon!
ALSO funnily enough wrt the armor. i have indeed never once drawn king out of his armor while boning bc i figure well. itd be a spur of the moment thing if kingedfrin do fuck each other with intent to kill and taking armor off takes like 3 business days even when its not armor the size of a mcmansion. thankfully king has thigh high sabatons like the WHORE he is so its fun and easy to draw 👍🏽
#im glad ur enjoying my brain eating mold spores (kingedfrin content)#another hot post from me!#another hot ask from someone!
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kingedfrin anon hi hello ive been thinking about it all day pretty much because im normal. anyway wrt you talking about him manipulating sif to do whatever.... it wouldn't even be that hard. it would not take all that much. he could take a ridiculously soft approach and still end up with siffrin doing literally anything for him because that freak has low self esteem and honestly might idealize the concept of a codependent relationship because he likes feeling useful and needed and shit. straight up desperate for attention & affection. as long as king strokes their hair every once in a while while they're choking on it, they'd get down on their knees for him every single time he asked without fail. do you see the vision here.
I SEE THE VISION LIKE ITS KINGS 1HITKO ATTACK. thats what im fucking talking about like exactly!!!! itd be so so so so easy! even in canon where he has the party sif has ZERO standards as to how they should be treated! so if they met pre-party theres no fucking way sif wouldnt do or become anything king wants so long as he is giving them bare minimum attention and affection! manipulating that gay little traveler is like easy baby mode even for like. an average person who isnt necessarily inclined to do things like that. for king? it'd be easy as breathing.
i started elaborating further and it turned into a small king analysis before i even got to siffrin so. im actually gonna make that a reblog addition to this ask in a minute bc its wordy and has pictures.
anyways hard agree with everything you said. i know king could get sif to do literally anything and everything for him with the promise of love and affection, providing a sense of security/safety in terms of being cared about (even if no one cares about or wants sif, so long as they're trying their best for him, king always will), and giving them a reason to keep going. like tbh i think he could get sif to a point where the sexual shit is nothing. im giving an example under readmore bc its well. a heavy topic and appropriately fucked up for this whole thing:
off the top of my head in these specific circumstances, i have no doubt that king could get sif to the point that he could break every one of their limbs one by one and have them thank him for it. because king wouldn't have bothered to do that if he didn't care about and for siffrin in some way. he wouldn't do that if he didn't like or want siffrin, whether it's for him as a person, his origins / common roots with king, or even just his body. he wouldn't be so determined to keep them with him so much that he's willing to go to such extreme lengths to just to keep siffrin with him. even though (in sifs mind) siffrin is stupid, disgusting, pathetic, clingy, needy, and has no inherent value beyond what little he can do to be of use.
so! something as worthless as siffrin should be grateful to be so very cherished by someone as smart, powerful, and driven as king that he'd even bother to prevent them from leaving. hurting sif isn't a punishment; it's a lesson and an expression of love. it's a gift. so siffrin really should appreciate it. he should be thankful. after all, the pain and fear king makes siffrin feel while disciplining him is what makes the love, gentle affection, and comfort king gives him in the aftermath so euphoric. because it means siffrin has earned that love and care by paying his dues for his mistakes! it means they're forgiven, it means they're beloved, and most importantly, it means they know for a fact that he will never, ever be alone like before ever again. whether they like it or not!
#hello hi can anyone hear me. look at my post boy (gn)#im like. genuinely hyperfixated on kingedfrin rn so i do feel like a rabid fucking beast bc its just me and 2 other sickos in here#please. please. i NEED to talk about these FREAKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#'why are you self-rbing here instead of main' You Know Good And Damn Well Why#selfrb
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remind me to hornypost in a bit after im done working. adding it to my agenda
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i need to make this clear ahead of time. any kingfrin i draw / write / talk about is ALWAYS t4t unless specified otherwise. this is never once relevant in-character in any way but it IS absolutely key to the experience i personally enjoy and provide 👍🏽
#you may ask 'didnt you draw king nutting in sif until he looks like he was on site at a semen factory explosion'#and to that i say. king is the size of 3 amish barns stacked together and wishcraft erased an entire country. its fine#king can have functioning virile internal testes to knock up sif with as a treat. why not project my own desires onto that wretched man#its fine. its woke even#another hot post from me!#kingedfrin
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sorry if this is too controversial for the woke left but it has to be said. siffrin would walk across hot coals if it means he gets to put isa's jockstrap into a paper bag and huff it like paint thinner. facts dont care about your feelings little libs 🙄
#this is another one of my visions in that i super dont care about Stinkie if its not on a person or if its not pussystink specifically#its what sif wants. im just the messenger#another hot post from me!#isafwin
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my fucikng brain Wyrms got to me. unhinged kingfrin moments that live in my mind rent free in no particular order under readmore.
ALSO BTW while screenshotting these i found it really interesting/cool that king ONLY says siffrin's name in the act 3 to act 4 transition event where he kills bonnie to "teach siffrin a lesson". and he uses siffrins name in this segment WAY more often to a pointed and insistent degree compared to his way of speaking (where he doesnt address people directly very often, only once or twice max per entire paragraphs of dialogue)
kingedfrin anon hi hello ive been thinking about it all day pretty much because im normal. anyway wrt you talking about him manipulating sif to do whatever.... it wouldn't even be that hard. it would not take all that much. he could take a ridiculously soft approach and still end up with siffrin doing literally anything for him because that freak has low self esteem and honestly might idealize the concept of a codependent relationship because he likes feeling useful and needed and shit. straight up desperate for attention & affection. as long as king strokes their hair every once in a while while they're choking on it, they'd get down on their knees for him every single time he asked without fail. do you see the vision here.
I SEE THE VISION LIKE ITS KINGS 1HITKO ATTACK. thats what im fucking talking about like exactly!!!! itd be so so so so easy! even in canon where he has the party sif has ZERO standards as to how they should be treated! so if they met pre-party theres no fucking way sif wouldnt do or become anything king wants so long as he is giving them bare minimum attention and affection! manipulating that gay little traveler is like easy baby mode even for like. an average person who isnt necessarily inclined to do things like that. for king? it'd be easy as breathing.
i started elaborating further and it turned into a small king analysis before i even got to siffrin so. im actually gonna make that a reblog addition to this ask in a minute bc its wordy and has pictures.
anyways hard agree with everything you said. i know king could get sif to do literally anything and everything for him with the promise of love and affection, providing a sense of security/safety in terms of being cared about (even if no one cares about or wants sif, so long as they're trying their best for him, king always will), and giving them a reason to keep going. like tbh i think he could get sif to a point where the sexual shit is nothing. im giving an example under readmore bc its well. a heavy topic and appropriately fucked up for this whole thing:
off the top of my head in these specific circumstances, i have no doubt that king could get sif to the point that he could break every one of their limbs one by one and have them thank him for it. because king wouldn't have bothered to do that if he didn't care about and for siffrin in some way. he wouldn't do that if he didn't like or want siffrin, whether it's for him as a person, his origins / common roots with king, or even just his body. he wouldn't be so determined to keep them with him so much that he's willing to go to such extreme lengths to just to keep siffrin with him. even though (in sifs mind) siffrin is stupid, disgusting, pathetic, clingy, needy, and has no inherent value beyond what little he can do to be of use.
so! something as worthless as siffrin should be grateful to be so very cherished by someone as smart, powerful, and driven as king that he'd even bother to prevent them from leaving. hurting sif isn't a punishment; it's a lesson and an expression of love. it's a gift. so siffrin really should appreciate it. he should be thankful. after all, the pain and fear king makes siffrin feel while disciplining him is what makes the love, gentle affection, and comfort king gives him in the aftermath so euphoric. because it means siffrin has earned that love and care by paying his dues for his mistakes! it means they're forgiven, it means they're beloved, and most importantly, it means they know for a fact that he will never, ever be alone like before ever again. whether they like it or not!
#im so fucking normal right now. i prommy. step closer to my enclosure boy#kingedfrin#another hot post from me!
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ADDING THE MINI KING ANALYSIS SEGMENT HERE NOW B4 I FORGET. its under da readmore! also i might add another segment that's just a compilation of all the crazy out of pocket shit king has said to sif. anyhoot
king in canon is like genuinely insanely perspective to a degree that rivals if not surpasses odile. he's scary good at reading people on the spot & coming to mostly accurate conclusions on them and using that to figure out the best angle to use for trying to persuade them. AND he's not only very Proficient at manipulation along with being more than willing to use it, but also a huge bitch who genuinely enjoys and relishes in doing so successfully.
like. king is VERY much a "my way or the highway and by highway i mean Killing You" kind of person. he genuinely believes that he's always in the right, he's simply doing what needs to be done, and if you oppose him it's you're either 1) not understanding what needs to be done or 2) worthless vermin getting in his way to spite him specifically. he is also INSANELY egoistical and narcissistic; he says shit like this without a hint of irony:
I really need to underline how insanely egoistical "The Universe Itself follows my will" is. THE most deeply ingrained mantra/aspect of the Universe faith to the point that it bypasses the island retcon is "The Universe leads. We can only follow". and this guy claims it follows him. this is NOT the kind of person you want around someone as desperate for connection and direction as pre-party siffrin dude. like. pov you are king and siffrin is approaching you:
kingedfrin anon hi hello ive been thinking about it all day pretty much because im normal. anyway wrt you talking about him manipulating sif to do whatever.... it wouldn't even be that hard. it would not take all that much. he could take a ridiculously soft approach and still end up with siffrin doing literally anything for him because that freak has low self esteem and honestly might idealize the concept of a codependent relationship because he likes feeling useful and needed and shit. straight up desperate for attention & affection. as long as king strokes their hair every once in a while while they're choking on it, they'd get down on their knees for him every single time he asked without fail. do you see the vision here.
I SEE THE VISION LIKE ITS KINGS 1HITKO ATTACK. thats what im fucking talking about like exactly!!!! itd be so so so so easy! even in canon where he has the party sif has ZERO standards as to how they should be treated! so if they met pre-party theres no fucking way sif wouldnt do or become anything king wants so long as he is giving them bare minimum attention and affection! manipulating that gay little traveler is like easy baby mode even for like. an average person who isnt necessarily inclined to do things like that. for king? it'd be easy as breathing.
i started elaborating further and it turned into a small king analysis before i even got to siffrin so. im actually gonna make that a reblog addition to this ask in a minute bc its wordy and has pictures.
anyways hard agree with everything you said. i know king could get sif to do literally anything and everything for him with the promise of love and affection, providing a sense of security/safety in terms of being cared about (even if no one cares about or wants sif, so long as they're trying their best for him, king always will), and giving them a reason to keep going. like tbh i think he could get sif to a point where the sexual shit is nothing. im giving an example under readmore bc its well. a heavy topic and appropriately fucked up for this whole thing:
off the top of my head in these specific circumstances, i have no doubt that king could get sif to the point that he could break every one of their limbs one by one and have them thank him for it. because king wouldn't have bothered to do that if he didn't care about and for siffrin in some way. he wouldn't do that if he didn't like or want siffrin, whether it's for him as a person, his origins / common roots with king, or even just his body. he wouldn't be so determined to keep them with him so much that he's willing to go to such extreme lengths to just to keep siffrin with him. even though (in sifs mind) siffrin is stupid, disgusting, pathetic, clingy, needy, and has no inherent value beyond what little he can do to be of use.
so! something as worthless as siffrin should be grateful to be so very cherished by someone as smart, powerful, and driven as king that he'd even bother to prevent them from leaving. hurting sif isn't a punishment; it's a lesson and an expression of love. it's a gift. so siffrin really should appreciate it. he should be thankful. after all, the pain and fear king makes siffrin feel while disciplining him is what makes the love, gentle affection, and comfort king gives him in the aftermath so euphoric. because it means siffrin has earned that love and care by paying his dues for his mistakes! it means they're forgiven, it means they're beloved, and most importantly, it means they know for a fact that he will never, ever be alone like before ever again. whether they like it or not!
#thats all for now. i could say more but i gotta do some actual work#im a joke im fixated on the worst guy ever in the history of anything but im a dyke so i dont even wanna fuck him#kingedfrin#king#another hot post from me!
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kingedfrin anon hi hello ive been thinking about it all day pretty much because im normal. anyway wrt you talking about him manipulating sif to do whatever.... it wouldn't even be that hard. it would not take all that much. he could take a ridiculously soft approach and still end up with siffrin doing literally anything for him because that freak has low self esteem and honestly might idealize the concept of a codependent relationship because he likes feeling useful and needed and shit. straight up desperate for attention & affection. as long as king strokes their hair every once in a while while they're choking on it, they'd get down on their knees for him every single time he asked without fail. do you see the vision here.
I SEE THE VISION LIKE ITS KINGS 1HITKO ATTACK. thats what im fucking talking about like exactly!!!! itd be so so so so easy! even in canon where he has the party sif has ZERO standards as to how they should be treated! so if they met pre-party theres no fucking way sif wouldnt do or become anything king wants so long as he is giving them bare minimum attention and affection! manipulating that gay little traveler is like easy baby mode even for like. an average person who isnt necessarily inclined to do things like that. for king? it'd be easy as breathing.
i started elaborating further and it turned into a small king analysis before i even got to siffrin so. im actually gonna make that a reblog addition to this ask in a minute bc its wordy and has pictures.
anyways hard agree with everything you said. i know king could get sif to do literally anything and everything for him with the promise of love and affection, providing a sense of security/safety in terms of being cared about (even if no one cares about or wants sif, so long as they're trying their best for him, king always will), and giving them a reason to keep going. like tbh i think he could get sif to a point where the sexual shit is nothing. im giving an example under readmore bc its well. a heavy topic and appropriately fucked up for this whole thing:
off the top of my head in these specific circumstances, i have no doubt that king could get sif to the point that he could break every one of their limbs one by one and have them thank him for it. because king wouldn't have bothered to do that if he didn't care about and for siffrin in some way. he wouldn't do that if he didn't like or want siffrin, whether it's for him as a person, his origins / common roots with king, or even just his body. he wouldn't be so determined to keep them with him so much that he's willing to go to such extreme lengths to just to keep siffrin with him. even though (in sifs mind) siffrin is stupid, disgusting, pathetic, clingy, needy, and has no inherent value beyond what little he can do to be of use.
so! something as worthless as siffrin should be grateful to be so very cherished by someone as smart, powerful, and driven as king that he'd even bother to prevent them from leaving. hurting sif isn't a punishment; it's a lesson and an expression of love. it's a gift. so siffrin really should appreciate it. he should be thankful. after all, the pain and fear king makes siffrin feel while disciplining him is what makes the love, gentle affection, and comfort king gives him in the aftermath so euphoric. because it means siffrin has earned that love and care by paying his dues for his mistakes! it means they're forgiven, it means they're beloved, and most importantly, it means they know for a fact that he will never, ever be alone like before ever again. whether they like it or not!
#sif makes such an easy and fun chew toy honestly. on an ethical level i disagree with king on every level but as a sadist dom? well.#you cant show a wolf a fragile but juicy lamb with a broken leg looking up at it with big teary eyes and NOT expect it to bite tear maim ea#you know?#but yeah on an unrelated note the size difference both pre-wish king and post wish hugelarge king goes fucking CRAZY#im foaming at the mouth. sorry#kingedfrin anon#kingedfrin#ok tags. i need to do those liberally#abusive relationship cw#manipulation cw#victim blaming cw#gaslighting mention cw#physical abuse cw#emotional abuse cw#if i missed anything lmk#another hot post from me!
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kingedfrin anon im still replying to ur ask as it gave me visions most yap inducing. u are my beloved [kisses your hand most knightly then immediately trips over a rock]
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