shuahearts

[shuahearts]

maroon - yjh

pairings: yoon jeonghan x fem!reader

content: your valentines date, yoon jeonghan, wasn't the best at being reliable since the beginning. you probably shouldn't be giving him another chance, but with how much he's seemed to change since he met you, who were you to judge?

wc: 4k

genre: angst, fluff, suggestive

warnings: alcohol consumption (kinda), blonde jeonghan needs his own warning, mentions/allusions to sex, fwb to lovers

a/n: hii <3 happy valentines day! my first official fic on this acc lol... i hope you all like it!! reblogs are appreciated

He didn’t show. Though you were somehow expecting him not to, it still felt like a gut-punch to the stomach, the embarrassment and the way it surged through your body and cheeks, was an agonizing reminder that he wasn’t actually yours. 

Evening was nearly upon the city street as you were perched on a bench. You scrunched the pretty red fabric beneath you, holding your equally as pretty bag close, both of which contrasted to the displeased frown on your face. You’ve always been fond of Valentine's day, hence the reason why your expectations were held higher today, but with every passing loving couple that walked by came a wave of disappointment and several wake-up calls.

You had messaged Yoon Jeonghan hesitantly yesterday, he wasn’t exactly the type to hold conversations with you on text. Some days, responses would be scarce and other days, they would come immediately. Yesterday had been one of those days in particular:

You: are you busy tomorrow?

Yoon: i think i’m free, angel

Yoon: mmm it’s valentine’s, do you want to meet up?

You: if you want to

Yoon: of course i do. do you?

You: i do

Yoon: meet you at 6

It was 6:23. Perhaps it was stupid to assume that you both would meet up for anything other than the usual– sex with zero romantic ties, no intent of love with little room for consideration of anything beyond a companionship. There was something different in the air though, whether that be Jeonghan’s open softness towards you or the Valentine's day spirit. Either way you knew if you kept letting the lingering hue of crimson remain on your cheeks, or flush throughout every part of you when he was around, you weren’t going to last.

You met him your sophomore year of college. Not one to be easily convinced, your friend Soonyoung had been adamant in taking you to one of those awful frat parties that reeked with hooch and rancid booze. Out of complete boredom and honestly annoyance, you had agreed to his suggestion, and to your shock it had been the exact opposite experience.

The party was small. Not much room to do a fucking keg-stand, but enough to know that the sole intention of it was getting laid. The drinks in general didn’t seem as cheap as you had initially expected when walking in. The event Soonyoung had taken you to was obviously of higher class and it worried you that he forgot to leave that bit out for you– because now you felt extremely small and underdressed compared to everyone else.

Half of the night you couldn’t recall, not only was it far from the expected loud and sweaty stereotype that frat parties held for themselves, but it was just boring. 

Boring until you realized on your way out you bumped into a near stranger, colliding into them. An amazing misfortune for you, since the wine glass he had appeared to be holding in his hand was shattered onto the floor after the fluids splashed directly onto your torso. Any shriek you could have let out was immediately muffled by the feeling of a palm covering your mouth. 

“Fuck, I am so sorry about that,” he mumbled with a groan, clearly trying to evade the attention away from you both, and thanks to the apparent conceitedness the guests at this party had, heads turned away from you both after a few moments. His hand dropped to his side, he seethed at the mess he made. You’re not even given a chance to look at whoever this man was as he was dragging you elsewhere, “would hate for you to step on that glass.”

You couldn’t lie to yourself and say you didn’t know who this man was just by looking at the back of his blonde head. He was all the talk around campus, infamous Yoon Jeonghan and his habit of flirting with everyone and practically their mothers. Hell, the way he took your hand in his told you exactly what you needed to know about him: you had to tread lightly. (Not lightly enough, you noted, the wine on your shirt was still very much there).

And with that you were immediately taken into the bathroom, Jeonghan disregarded the line that was outside the door and went inside when it was vacant, shutting the door behind you. Sighing and observing your stained shirt, he tsked in disapproval, “you’ve got wine all over you, sweetheart.”

Your eyes narrowed, “your wine.”

He hummed and shrugged, “if that makes you feel better.”

Sighing exasperatedly, you watched him grab a washcloth in his cupboards, “it’s fine. Don’t bother. I can go home and wash up.”

While you were wondering what on earth was so amusing to this guy, he hummed again, turning to face you, “but while we’re here at my house, can’t we get the job done quicker?”

“I’m just saying you don’t have to. It’s fine, I’ll be fine.”

“You know I would hate for such a pretty girl to show up at my party just to leave after I made a complete mess all over her,” he stepped forward, inching closer to you, “and although the red looks perfect on you, you don’t seem very pleased with it�� or me, for that matter.”

That was the flirtatious manner everyone had been buzzing about. If you didn’t know any better you may have thought there was a bolder, ulterior motive within his words. You didn’t let yourself believe him.

When Jeonghan earned a glare from you, he chuckled in surprise, “you don’t believe me.”

With a shake of your head, he flashed you a satirical grin at your answer: “I don’t think I should.”

Jeonghan takes the now dampened washcloth in his hand, taking a moment to drink you in before he figures he should wipe off the drying mahogany that stuck onto your skin. It did make you look good, “will you please let me at least do this? If I don’t, it’ll remain in my guilty conscience forever.”

You sighed and gave him permission, you hadn’t really given yourself an option because how were you supposed to go home without Soonyoung, anyway? He smiled and reached out to cup your cheek, the other hand wiping your neck with the washcloth for some reason, agonizingly slow.

“I wasn’t lying by the way,” he mumbled, “I’ve had eyes on you the entire night, you’re one of Soonyoung’s friends, right?”

You ignored his initial comments, “yeah.”

“Should scold him for hiding you from me later.”

“Hiding me?” You asked, confused. 

“I’ve never seen you around. Soonyoung surely would've mentioned having such a gem of a friend. Are you two dating?”

You shook your head, “I tend to avoid you.”

He clicked his tongue in disdain, “you know me?”

When you nodded, he clicked his tongue again, “I assure you that you don’t. Whatever you’ve heard about me doesn't equate to familiarity, angel. But you could know me. You should.”

You don't respond, trying to turn your attention away from the feeling of the warm washcloth dragging across your skin, “what’s your name so I can call you by it, pretty?”

“Y/n,” it didn’t matter whether or not you told him, something about him said that he’d find out either way.

“Well, Y/n. If you’d like I can wash your clothes for you and give you some of mine to wear, then you’ll be on your way home. I’m sorry about this, again.”

You were beginning to deep yourself in a hole, what was the harm of indulging in it? This man had come into contact with your skin faster than anyone has and maybe he was just captivating and sweet, but you were yet to learn about him. The way he happened to be the most gorgeous man you’ve laid your eyes upon was also a harmful position you would eventually put yourself into. 

And even though Jeonghan knew he was just being kind, a part of him also knew that he wasn't one to usually do this, and the tipsy state he was put in had drawn him into you. Though you had just been standing for the majority of the party, he thought you were captivating, so beautiful and something new he just needed. He hadn't meant to fuck up his plans by somehow spilling wine all over you, but he liked to think that tonight was going to work in his favor.

“Okay,” you accepted his offer. Jeonghan could feel his lips pull into a smile and his heart rate intensify as he took you out of his bathroom, into his room.

Pulling out a random t-shirt for you to wear, he tossed it to you, “change into this and I’ll wash your outfit. You’re free to wait in here for now.”

And so you did.

That was the first ever time you spent in Jeonghan’s ever-familiar room, and somehow you both knew it wouldn't be the last. It didn't take long for him to take further interest in you. Red-flushed skin to skin contact that turned into something more, Jeonghan had found you to be all kinds of things: alluring, gorgeous, perfect, and sometimes he could argue that you were made for him. The way he kissed down your exposed back in such adoration and the way he coaxed you into giving into him every single time. It was enthralling and somehow he couldn't get enough of you.

Though, you could retort that it wasn't the case that way with Jeonghan. Sure he had put care into you after completely taking your ability to walk, but it was nothing short of superficial to you. You knew after each time he took you, he would go back to pretending you didn't exist, and it was a cycle you hadn’t been bothered with until now.

You: do you want to study with me in the library tonight?

Yoon: i was busy. sorry 

That was his usual excuse. He was busy. You weren’t sure if he was fooling around with other women, while you yourself, well your only action was Jeonghan and it didn’t help that you felt yourself begin to harbor feelings for him. It made you feel uneasy and unsure in your situation with him.

After an outing with Soonyoung however, his bad habit of gossiping slipped on him, “it’s really funny. Whenever we’re all hanging out at Jeonghan’s, you know, the guys, he’s always leaving his room to join us after like 10 minutes.”

You made a sound of confusion, obviously bewildered as to why he was telling you this, “okay?”

Soonyoung grunts after sipping out of his straw, maybe you weren’t aware that everyone was aware, “his hair is all messy and he’s out of breath and he's red, Y/n. You’re always in there, huh?”

You felt yourself choke on your drink, he was right. You lost count of how many times Jeonghan had just finished with you, inside you, cleaning up his mess and kissing your bare shoulder sweetly before you drifted off to sleep in his bed. Now that you were aware his entire group knew– despite the fact that he would usually spend time avoiding you– made you feel embarrassed, “I’d rather we not discuss my… sex life, Soonie.”

“I think Jeonghan likes you, though. Everytime we ask him about you he’s all flustered and tries avoiding the question,” he shrugged, to which you only groaned.

“That’s because we have nothing to do with each other outside of that room. Or at least, that’s what he thinks.”

“I think you’re a liar, because he hasn’t been like this with anyone ever since his ex,” Soonyoung hums, pondering, “I don’t know, though. Sorry if I overstepped.”

Part of you wanted to press him for details, another told you just to leave it in complete ignorance. You chose the latter, but you wanted to ask: “been like what?” There was nothing between you both but an undiscussed trust you held for each other.

Nothing between you both. But you couldn’t deny the obvious tension between you and Jeonghan when his stare lingered on you longer in the halls between breaks, or how you knew he felt something when you were giving everyone attention but him at his stupid parties, and how you knew he wasn’t going to do anything about it. It had been a year of this. You were a pulling force and Jeonghan no longer knew how much he could take if you weren’t his, but something inside him felt it wasn’t right.

It’s not like you hadn't tried branching out, and Jeonghan didn't seem to mind when you did (which bothered you more than words could describe).  

But there was an underlying problem– each man that had tried to pursue you was a terrible choice. They were awful in terms of personality, lacked any sense of self-awareness, and most recently, they couldn't measure up to Jeonghan. If you were going to do this you needed to stop thinking about him.

You were walking back to your house one night, coming back from a date which went the usual direction: with a boring, assholish man who made you pay for the meal once again. It didn't piss you off this time, you wouldn't let it. You were tired and ready to give up.

As the buzz sets off on your phone, you couldn’t help a grimace at who could possibly be texting you that late at night. However, there could only be one possibility.

Yoon: are you free?

Yoon: i know it’s late but i miss you 

You: jeonghan

Yoon: angel

You: i just got back from a date

Yoon: oh

Yoon: bad time?

You: no

You: can you come?

Yoon: i’m on my way 

The familiar knock on your door came minutes later, you swung it open and Jeonghan was taken aback by your appearance. You were dressed gorgeously in a blood-colored dress, tears ran down your face and Jeonghan felt himself surge inside, closing the door behind him and taking your cheeks in his hands.

“What’s wrong, Y/n? Did something happen?” Jeonghan asked you worriedly in a panic.

You sniffled, exhaling exasperatedly, both hands reaching up to take his wrists and peel his hold off of you. You knew what was wrong, “I’m just not cut out for anyone, I guess,” you turned to face away from his gaze, “no one.”

Jeonghan pressed his lips into a tight line, “you know that isn't true.”

It didn't occur to you that Jeonghan didn't care who you dated, you knew once you were unavailable he would eventually become a complete stranger, “what do I know?”

“Look at me,” he prompted firmly, and you complied sharply, “I don’t know what those poor excuses of men are doing with you but they don't know how to treat you at all.”

You watch him inch towards you, his hands finding purchase onto your cheeks again, kissing where a wet tear had just slid down, “I’m trying to be okay with you going out with people that obviously don't deserve you, but it’s really hard especially when they make tears run down your pretty face like this.”

“Baby?” He whispered against your lips, you wanted his on yours, “do me a favor?”

“Hm?”

“Eyes on me tonight,” he grunted, “don’t think about anyone else but me. Please?”

“Okay,” you croaked, finally feeling his lips on yours, not before he pulled away, groaning incoherent mumbles as his hands traveled down your figure, fingers gliding among your dress as they hiked up the bottom of them.

“They don’t deserve you, this,” he hummed, “I’ll make you forget they even exist.”

There was a distinct blur between where it was appropriate for the both of you to just be friends with benefits and more. 

Throughout the next few weeks, there was an obvious shift in your relationship with him. 

He no longer let his stare falter from you in the halls, his lips curved into a tempting smile as you passed by. Whenever you met up with him, he was greeted with your arms wrapped around his as his body pressed against yours warmly. You could feel his lips on your head, whispering “I missed you,” into your hair before a kiss, which vibrated throughout you.

It was a real shame that you knew that you could never be his, and he could never be yours, even when the lines in your relationship with him have blurred into complete dissipation.

Even when you could've sworn you could hear him whisper the words I love you, tickling your wine-sucked covered neck as his chest was pressed flush against your back & you could feel it rise and fall intensely.

Jeonghan wasn't one for commitment, and you knew that, but you were already so far. It was truly a shame how you let yourself fall for him when you knew.

6:35, the sun would’ve been gone, maybe if you let go of the hope you held for all of this. The hope you latched onto that you could be something more today. The hearts, the red and pink decorations and the occasional couples passing by on the street of the bench where you sat. It was all in vain. You could admire, but never be the one admired from the sole being you wanted it the most from. Even if he had given you room to hope.

About ready to accept defeat and break it all off, a low voice came from directly behind you.

“I’m sorry I made you wait so long, angel.”

Your head snaps in the direction of the familiar voice, your eyebrows scrunched at the sudden presence of Jeonghan, when you were sure tonight was going to be another night of him cancelling out of the blue. 

He didn't give you much time to bask in every part of him, the way your eyes flickered to his serious expression to his very new hair– maroon, a dark difference from the blonde he would sport on his long locks. And finally, when he straightened, a giant bouquet filled with scattered red carnations wrapped  in the most luxurious tissue paper tied in a golden bow was held in his hands. His breath was labored and his chest continued to rise and fall as he looked at every part of you.

You felt confused, angry, and relieved all at once. All you wanted were answers.

“You’re late. You’re so late, Jeonghan, where were you?” You felt your voice break as you stood to face him behind the bench.

He looked at the flowers and then at you, “I swear I left the house early, quarter before six, promise Y/n. But I saw the flower parlor a few blocks down selling this gorgeous bouquet and the way they reminded me of you told me it was almost criminal not to get them. I didn't think it would take nearly an hour to wait in line, I’m sorry, baby.”

Your heart dropped, “you waited an hour to get these for me? Why didn't you text?”

“I didn't bring my phone, I was already halfway in line and I wanted it to be a surprise,” you watched him walk around the bench to stop in front of you, “I’m sorry you waited for me for this long, this is important to me, Y/n.”

“I…” You trailed off, not knowing what to say, your eyes traveled back and forth between the flowers, his incredibly handsome suit and his hair which matched effortlessly, “I don't understand anymore.”

He practically deflated at your words, “understand what, angel?”

“This, us,” you exhaled wobbly and let a hand run through your hair before letting it drop to your sides, “what we are. I don't get it, you pretend I don't exist for days and then treat me like I’m everything and more to you. Is it that hard just to choose one instead of leaving me to hang and dry like this?”

His expression softened as you continued, “you’re so confusing, Jeonghan, how do you want me so I can stop getting my hopes up–”

“I love you.”

“W-what?”

“I want to be your boyfriend, Y/n. I’ve wanted you since the day I laid my eyes on you, God, I love you and I’m sorry it’s taken me this long to say it.”

You felt an all-familiar profound feeling in your chest, the ones you would feel when staring at him when he fell asleep on your table, insisting he’d watch you study. Or when you felt him pepper his kisses when he thought you’d be sleeping, or just seeing him direct his alluring smile to you, “are you… sure?”

He sighed, “I’ve been so sure it’s terrifying, but not about how you felt. I wasn't sure if you want me the same way I want you, so I figured the feelings would disappear naturally,” Jeonghan set the beautiful bouquet of carnations on the bench before reaching for your hands, “I don't want to be anyone else’s but yours. You’re the only thing in my life that’s going well, and I didn't want to lose that. I’m so sorry.”

You shook your head, wriggling your hands out of his grip and Jeonghan’s heart dropped as he was sure that he had lost you now, until he felt them cup his cheeks warmly, “I want to be with you Jeonghan. No more disappearing, no more leaving, if you mean it, can you do that?”

He nods rapidly and eagerly, “I don't ever want to. I promise.”

Feeling a smile creep onto your face, you pressed a kiss on his lips, full of love and sincerity. You felt his own form of a smirk before pulling away, “so, am I…?”

“Yes, Jeonghan, you’re my boyfriend,” you rolled your eyes at him, playfully hitting his chest, “and for the record, I love you too.”

With a giggle he takes the bouquet and hands it to you, in which you gladly take. You gesture to his hair and his eyebrows rose up in realization, “oh yeah, do you like it?”

Cradling the carnations in one hand, he took your free hand, swinging it happily as you nodded, “why red?”

He shrugged, “it reminded me of you. It makes me look sexy, doesn't it?”

You sighed and jokingly nudged him, in which he feigned injury, “it does. So, where do you suppose we go?”

His footsteps mirrored yours, “I made reservations for that one fancy restaurant down the block,” he hummed, “it’s at 7, so we have just enough time to walk there now.”

“At seven? What were we supposed to do for an hour, Jeonghan?” 

His hand gripped yours tighter, and there was no mistaking what his quiet chuckle implied.

“Jeonghan.”

He chuckled again before stopping to face you. He ran a hand down your arm, “we can do that later, there’s a lot I want to do. But right now, I just want to be with you.”

He leans in to place a kiss on your cheek, “and before I get a chance to say it and rip this dress off of you later, you look absolutely beautiful.”

Your cheeks burned off a dark cherry afterwards, just before he began to walk with you again.

“Happy Valentine’s Day, Jeonghan,” you murmur sheepishly.

He hummed, turning his head to pull you in for another kiss on the cheek, “happy Valentine’s, my Y/n.”

[shuahearts]

i need help if this reaches any tags T__T

but does anyone recall or have the jeonghan fic where they're roommates/bffs and jeonghan calls reader daffy? he was a doctor and reader was a journalist of some sort and i can't find it which sucks because it was really sweet 😭😭

[shuahearts]

to live again | yoon jeonghan

ミ★ synopsis: it’s been years since your last milestone birthday; a time when everything still felt right in the world with youth and ambition. now that you’re older and times have changed, would you dare take a chance to save someone else in the past at the cost of your own future?

ミ★ genre: time travel!au, childhood friends to lovers!au, slow burn, angst, some fluff, some humor

ミ★ warnings: mentions of depression, suicidal thoughts, and brief(?) major character death

ミ★ word count: 38,765 (what in gods name.)

ミ★ pairings: jeonghan x gender neutral reader

ミ★ notes: omg hey… long time no see haha …. okay i’m sorry for not posting for five months it’s my fault but uh this was supposed to be my three year anniversary gift and then i failed as a human being KSHGRKDHK i’m so sorry it’s so hard balancing writing and university :,)) but i’m offering my longest oneshot ever as both a peace offering and a three year anniversary gift! i hope you guys enjoy this one, and PLEASE make sure to read the warnings! i love you all, thank you for your endless support even tho i’m not as active anymore </333

Keep reading

[shuahearts]

[shuahearts]

nothing a little camaraderie can't fix ❊ yoon jeonghan

you've always hated jeonghan, and jeonghan has always hated you. however, matters of the heart take time, and maybe that slytherin you've sworn to detest forever isn't really as bad as you'd originally thought.

❋ pairing: jeonghan x f!reader

❋ words: 14.1k

❋ genre: fluff, angst, humor (i tried) // slytherin!jeonghan, ravenclaw!reader, hogwarts au, enemies to lovers au, i guess it's also rivals to lovers in a way, junwoo as best buddies <33, this got kinda long it really was not supposed to be this long oops, also i highkey love joshua in this one, i almost put a love triangle in this and then i chose to let it be

❋ warnings: swearing & name calling, they're mean, quidditch-related violence

❋ notes: first svt fic! hello caratblr aaaa pls reblog/leave feedback it would mean the world to me 💫 (i wrote this over a few days while procrastinating on hw so its unedited and badly written sorry in advance xx)

back to masterlist

Junhui is trying very hard not to accidentally butcher your Potions partner assignment and get you both Dreadfuls for the concoction, but at the rate he’s going, you might as well give up on your Acceptable aspirations.

“You had one job,” you tell your best friend, setting your knife down for a break. Whatever’s in your cauldron bubbles consistently, a garish blue color that it definitely shouldn’t be if Yook Sungjae’s cauldron next to you is any indication. “All I ask for today is an A, Jun. Just an A. Please.”

“I’m not doing anything!” the boy yells back at you, pointing at the mixture frantically. “We followed all the instructions, you watched me put everything in!”

“I literally haven’t touched anything until now! I only just started cutting these up!”

“Maybe you’re doing it wrong!”

Your potion makes a strange popping noise in the silence that follows, and you sigh, rubbing your temple. “Merlin, we are a mess.”

There’s nothing more you can really do, since Professor Slughorn is busy handling a near-disaster on the other side of the classroom, so you return to slicing the dandelion roots, at just the right angle and width as you were instructed. You’re just about done with the last one, ready to sweep them all into the cauldron and hope for the best, when a hand reaches out and plucks one off the table.

“Hey!”

“Too thick,” a familiar voice drawls. You lift your eyes to meet a pair you’ve grown to harbor a deep hatred for over the years. “Are you sure you were paying attention last class, L/N? Or did the Hat make a mistake putting you in Ravenclaw?”

“Very rude of you,” Jun remarks calmly from his spot. You’ve known him long enough to understand that behind the tranquil demeanor, he’s definitely as irritated as you are. “Kindly take your flat ass back to your seat and apply your ludicrous, crack-brained academic principles to yourself.”

Yoon Jeonghan, for all of his smug glory of several seconds prior, looks taken aback for a moment.

“What he said,” you add, just to reaffirm, enjoying the moment of confusion on his face. It’s gone soon enough though, replaced by that easy, sure-of-himself smile that’s always playing on his lips.

“My ass is most definitely not flat.”

You throw your hands up in the air. “Jun insulted you in several different ways, and that’s what you choose to focus on?”

“Can’t have my reputation tarnished, can I?” Jeonghan drops the root back into your pile. “In any case, good luck getting anything above a Troll on this potion. So much for wisdom and intelligence and all that.”

“You are a total dickhead,” Jun says solemnly.

“I’ll have you know I’m in the top of our year in several subjects,” you fume back at Jeonghan, “Transfiguration included, which I know you suck at because you accidentally turned Xu Minghao into a frog once instead of a turtle. Amphibians and reptiles are very different.”

“That was two years ago,” he responds coolly, shaking his head to get his hair out of his face. “I don’t repeat mistakes. And I certainly outdo myself every single time.”

“And the sky is bright yellow with polka dots, and pigs can fly.”

“Well, they can, if we assist a little bit —”

“Yoon Jeonghan, get out of here before I send you flying through the door,” you spit. “My wand is in my pocket, and Slughorn’s back is turned. I’m not afraid to use it.”

“You know I’d never turn down an opportunity to duel,” he says (you do know, especially after he and Jun nearly faced off in the Great Hall at breakfast during your second year), his eyes flickering around the classroom, “but I don’t think you would enjoy it too much if I made a fool out of you in front of our class, would you?”

“I don’t think you could,” you say delicately, reaching over him to push the sliced roots into the cauldron.

“Is that a challenge, L/N?”

You sprinkle a bit of pearl dust into the concoction, along with a scoop of powdered horseradish and several rose petals, right when Jun catches on and reaches over with the bottle of neem oil to splash a bit in. As the newly added ingredients boil and dissolve, the consistency and color of your potion seem to return to normal, a pale translucent shade rather than the dark blue it was earlier.

A smug smile dances on your face as you look up triumphantly. “I think I’d win, don’t you?”

“Well,” Jeonghan says, folding his arms. “I’ll say I’m impressed. Didn’t think you had it in you, considering how the both of you struggle in this class each day.”

“We’re self-sufficient and can fix our own problems when we have them. As any good Ravenclaw would,” you emphasize the last phrase in response to the insult he threw your way earlier.

“‘Any good Ravenclaw’ might not find themselves in this position in the first place.”

“Shouldn’t you go to your partner and actually be useful for once instead of getting on our nerves?”

Jeonghan glances back at his table. His partner for the project, a pretty Hufflepuff third-year you’ve seen around the castle, is busy corking a vial of their potion, ready to turn it in at the end of class.

“Already been done. You’re just behind.”

Jun casually flips him off, eyes still on the open textbook propped against several containers. You wonder whether those two would have already killed each other by now if you weren’t around to stop things from escalating in either direction.

“Piss off, Yoon.”

“Mouthing off, now, are we?”

Slughorn rounds the corner before you can let a string of curses leave your mouth, pleasantly surprised by whatever you and Jun have brewed up.

“Positively wonderful, my dear! Look at this beautiful color, the consistency — oh! I expected nothing less from you both. Take fifteen points, each! Simply brilliant, you are…”

Jeonghan raises an eyebrow when your moment of glory is over and you reach for a vial to turn in a small sample. “Ravenclaw racking up points in the classroom as usual, eh?”

“Piss off,” Jun echoes your last words, cleaning up the supplies strewn across the table with a wave of his wand. “If you’re so salty about the point gap, try closing it on the field and then we’ll talk.”

You almost laugh, almost — Jun has definitely struck a nerve by the way Jeonghan’s jaw tenses, nostrils flaring. The fact that Slytherin has lost every game so far, save for the very first one against Hufflepuff, is a sore spot for the whole house, and the obvious disparity in points is displayed in the Great Hall, the hourglass of emeralds far lower than the others.

When Jun walks away to the front of the class, you’re left there facing Jeonghan.

“So,” you smirk, packing up your things. “Good luck on the pitch, then. Though with our lineup, I’m not sure what else you can do to save the game.”

“Awfully confident, are you?”

“Of course,” you answer proudly. “With players like Jun and Hyunjin, we’ll sweep Slytherin in no time.” 

He chuckles. “Your unwavering faith in everyone around you is pretty entertaining, I have to admit.”

That provokes you, causing anger to flare deep in your chest. You grip your bag so tight your knuckles hurt, slinging it over your shoulder.

“Well, I won’t entertain you any longer, Yoon. I’m out of here. Have fun preparing for your team to eat shit tomorrow.”

Jeonghan smiles slyly, turning to leave as well. “We’ll see,” he says cryptically. “May the best team win, L/N. But don’t forget that I always have a trick or two up my sleeve.”

Actually, if there is only one thing you remotely like that has to do with Yoon Jeonghan, it’s his best friend Joshua.

You’re not even sure how those two get along, but Joshua’s company is well and good enough for you — the Hufflepuff prefect is the opposite of his friend, kind and funny and everything wonderful. He’s also the perfect person for you to vent about your frustrations, most of which end up being about Jeonghan anyways. 

On days like today when all of your other friends are busy, you often accompany him on his evening rounds, doing a full lap of the castle while talking about your lives.

“I hear Slytherin and Ravenclaw are facing off this weekend,” Joshua says carefully. He’s trying to hide a smile, you know — after several years of friendship, he isn’t hard to read.

“Yes, that bastard you call a friend made sure to remind me,” you roll your eyes. “He decided to be particularly insufferable during Potions today, if you haven’t heard.”

“I have.”

“Wonderful.” You fold your arms, sighing. “I don’t get it. How can you even stand him?”

Joshua chuckles, pulling open the doors of a small cupboard to make sure no one’s inside.

“He’s my best friend, Y/N. As difficult as it is for you to believe, he is a good person at heart, and I voluntarily choose to put myself in his company every day.”

“I don’t believe it, but sure.”

“I’m serious! Have I told you —”

“Yes, you have,” you tell him. Countless times has Joshua recounted the story of how they all first became friends; he, Jeonghan, and Gryffindor’s own Choi Seungcheol. Countless times have you laughed it off, unable to reconcile his version of Jeonghan with yours, and you won’t start believing it today. 

“Then believe me when I say he’s a good friend, and he’s far better than he usually lets on.”

“You aren’t going to change my mind, Josh.”

“That’s not to say he isn’t a complete asshole,” he admits. “Because he can be, and usually is, a pain in the neck. But that’s just how he generally likes to present himself.”

“I still hate him.” You finger the end of your loosened tie absentmindedly as you two round another corner. “Jun hates him too. And — well, Wonwoo is outwardly neutral, but he probably doesn’t like him either.”

“Maybe it’s just a Ravenclaw thing,” Joshua jokes. “Y’know, eagles and snakes and all that — Oh?” He stops short, lips lifting into a smile as he looks ahead of him. “What are you lot doing here?”

You stop, too, but you scowl instead. Jeonghan raises his hand in greeting, walking towards his friend and ignoring you at first.

“Oh, just taking a walk after homework, I needed some air. The usual.” His eyes flicker to you and back. “Interesting company you’ve chosen tonight, ‘Shua.”

“Y/N comes with me most days,” he replies. “You just never remember it, do you?”

“No,” Jeonghan looks at you again, amused, “I don’t.”

Choi Seungcheol smiles at you warmly from beside him, a sharp contrast to the Slytherin towering over you. “Hey, Y/N. Nice to see Josh isn’t going about doing these alone, I’d imagine he needs someone to stop him from making any dumb choices —”

“Any stupid decisions I make are always heavily influenced by either or both of you idiots.”

“That isn’t true!”

“Cheol, I don’t want to hear anything about reckless decision-making from a Gryffindor, of all wizards. Merlin’s sake.”

You watch them bicker with a fond smile, tugging on Joshua’s sleeve when they escalate into loud yelling.

“Alright, that’s enough, you guys are going to make the portraits mad with all this ruckus, and Josh has to finish his rounds in time to head back to the basement.”

Seungcheol grins cheekily, red and gold robes swishing around his tall frame as he moves away. “See, I told you that you need her around. Pity you weren’t made prefect, Y/N, I reckon you’d be an awfully good one at that.”

“This is all your fault, Cheol,” Joshua says, but he’s patting his friends on the back amiably anyways, beaming. “We’ll get going then — unless you want to get back to Ravenclaw Tower now, Y/N —”

“No, I’m good,” you cut him off, hyper-aware of Jeonghan’s eyes boring into your back and eager to leave. “Let’s just go, yeah?”

The two of you hurry away before you’re sidetracked any more by his friends. Seungcheol gives you a friendly wave as you leave, and Jeonghan sends you off with a knowing smirk, the one that always puts you at unease, the one that you know means that he knows far more than you’d think. You don’t like it one bit.

“Seungcheol is quite nice,” you say, in an attempt to forget all the murderous thoughts you have about a certain Slytherin boy.

“Yes, he is,” Joshua agrees. “My friends are quite nice. Not that you would agree, though.”

“Yeah, I hate him,” you nod. “Yoon fucking Jeonghan, asshole extraordinaire.”

“Stunningly accurate.”

“The absolute worst, most infuriating person I’ve met in my life so far.”

Joshua winces lightly at this. “C’mon, won’t you cut him some slack? We’re sixteen, we do dumb things every day. He’s no exception.”

“He’s been making my life a living hell ever since we stepped off those boats and into the castle,” you grumble, remembering the way Jeonghan’s relentless teasing had begun the moment you met him, right before your Sorting ceremony four years ago. “There isn’t an excuse at this point.”

“All right, all right,” he says, giving up on ever getting you and his friend to see eye to eye. It won’t ever happen anyways, not with the way you speak about him during these evening rounds and the way Jeonghan talks about you like you’re the most irritating thing on this planet. Some people will never get along; maybe you two are an example of that. “Hate him all you want, Y/N, have at it. I won’t stop you.”

You smile gently. “Thanks,” you tell him as you approach the hallway that leads straight up to Ravenclaw Tower off the left side. “You okay to head down on your own?”

Joshua rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “I’ll make it to my common room alive, Y/N, don’t worry.”

“By the way, will you be at the game tomorrow?”

“Of course! My friends never miss mine, and I never miss theirs.”

You narrow your eyes. “You better be wearing blue and bronze when I spot you, Hong.”

“No promises, I’m afraid. My loyalty lies in all four houses all the time, anyways.” Joshua smiles. “You’ll just have to wait and see.”

“Don’t disappoint,” you tease lightly. “I’ll see you at breakfast, then. Good night!”

“‘Night, silly.”

“... I really meant what I said about the colors, Josh!”

“Yes, yes, I’m highly aware that you’d hex me if I show up in any colors but yours, Your Highness —”

“You’re not funny.”

“Would you like me to Transfigure my hat into a raven and bring it to the match instead?”

“You wouldn’t.”

“I’ll do it right now —”

“Joshua!”

Jeonghan’s eyes narrow at you as you enter the Great Hall, your friends Junhui and Wonwoo by your side. You’re very clearly tired, hair a mess and uniform off-kilter, and he has to stop himself from chortling at your obvious plight.

“What’re you laughing at?” Lee Jihoon asks his fellow Beater, grabbing another orange scone. “You’re never in a good mood this early in the morning.”

“Nothing.”

“You forget how transparent you are sometimes,” the Slytherin says dryly, following his gaze. “Is it that Ravenclaw girl again? The one you love to torture endlessly?”

“You know about that?”

“Everyone knows. There’s a reason Professor Greene never lets you two duel each other in DADA, you know. Can’t have a murder on school grounds.”

Jeonghan chuckles. “Only a little bit of fun, Jihoon. Getting a rise out of her has always been amusing.”

“Amusing until she decimates you with her wand,” the younger says casually. “She’s awfully good with hexes. I wouldn’t get on her bad side.”

Interesting. Jeonghan watches you flit around the Ravenclaw table, talking to your friends, laughing. An enigma since the first day he spoke to you. He wonders what stopped the Hat from sorting you into Hufflepuff, a hard worker at heart and loyal nearly to a fault.

“Anyways, we should get going.” Jihoon’s voice tugs him out of his head, bringing him back to reality. “Win or lose, we better be ready to play this match to death, I reckon.”

Yeah, and especially after the quarrel he had with you during Potions just a day prior, Jeonghan won’t know what to do with himself if his House loses yet again. He just decides that they’ll have to win, there’s no other way out, and he’ll do his part by sending off as many Bludgers as he can.

He follows Jihoon out of the Great Hall, only sparing you a side glance as you wave Junhui off with a smile, and tugs on his friend’s sleeve right when they enter the side shed, where the locker rooms and broomsticks are located. “Hey, listen. I have a plan.”

Jihoon pauses. “Is it legal?”

Jeonghan smirks. “This time… technically, yes.”

“Should I believe that, or?”

“Do you want to win or not?”

Jihoon sighs in defeat, smiling. “Go ahead, mate. I’m all ears.”

“Slytherin in possession of the Quaffle again! Garcia takes it to the middle of the pitch, weaving between the Ravenclaw players, she’s nearing the hoops — oh, no, never mind, Quaffle with Ravenclaw now, Wen taking it back with him. Blimey, that was so fast, I didn’t even see it!”

You and Wonwoo cheer from the stands, watching intently as Jun speeds to the other side of the pitch after a clever play and a few swift movements. Joshua stands with the three of you, donning one of his friend’s Slytherin scarves and having charmed his robes blue and bronze for the occasion. Seungcheol beside him, however, never bothered to change from his usual school attire.

“You stick out like a sore thumb,” you had told him earlier.

“Overslept,” he had said sheepishly. “Didn’t even make it to breakfast before Josh dragged me out.”

The commentary continues, an energetic seventh year Hufflepuff at the mic watching Jun dodge swipes and dart skillfully between converging players.

“Merlin, he’s quick. Careful there, mate! He’s got Yoon tailing him from the left, several Chasers blocking his right, c’mon now — Ooh! Yikes, that didn’t look too good…”

You gasp as Jun rolls over sharply, avoiding a Bludger sent his way by none other than Jeonghan.

“He could’ve fallen off,” you say angrily. “That’s way too close of a distance to hit someone!”

“He’s fine, look,” Wonwoo tries calming you down, pointing at the pitch. Jun dives slightly to dodge yet another one of Jeonghan’s Bludgers and makes a quick pass to a teammate, unable to get past the blockade of Slytherin Chasers. “He won’t fall.”

The game lasts quite a while, far longer than you had expected the opponent would be able to hold out. Your Seeker, a newly recruited third year called Vernon, hasn’t been able to find the Snitch yet: you’ve seen him speed towards something fluttering in the distance before stopping short when it suddenly disappears from sight.

Over time, however, it’s become clearly evident to you what a large part of the Slytherin strategy is. Every time Jun has a close call — which is frequent, too frequent to be a coincidence — you notice a similar pattern; one Slytherin Beater tails him and the other swings the nearest Bludger to his teammate, who sends it flying straight at your best friend. And it’s always, always handled by Jeonghan.

Thankfully, up until now, Jun has managed to get out of the way before getting hit, or one of your Beaters smacks it away for him, but your anxiety rises significantly with every attack.

“They’re targeting him,” you tell your friends. “It’s so obvious. They know that he’s the best Chaser we have, and that he almost always has the Quaffle — look, again! They aren’t even going after Vernon! Does that make any sense at all?”

“No,” Joshua admits. Both teams are evenly matched for points; if Vernon catches the Snitch, it’s game over for Slytherin, but the Beaters aren’t trying to deter him in any way. “I mean, whatever the hell Jeonghan’s trying to do, at least it’s not against the rules this time.”

You shoot him a dirty look.

“What? I’m just saying,” he defends. “He hasn’t tried to knock Jun off his broom while he’s not in possession. I’m pretty sure the rules say that if the Chaser’s got the Quaffle in hand, the Beaters can go to town.”

But you know better than that. You know that it isn’t just a ploy to win, but a revenge scheme, confirmed when Jeonghan manages to find you in the crowd after a particularly obnoxious play and gives you that mischievous smirk. Payback for Jun’s comments the other day, that’s what this is about.

You should have known. Jeonghan hates losing, but more than that, he hates losing to you. A defeat by Gryffindor, he can take — but not your house. Not anything that has to do with you, he’s made that clear over the five years you’ve been classmates.

“And that’s another goal for Ravenclaw! Ten up now, thanks to Hwang rushing in for the play, and now — oh dear, looks like they’ve spotted the Snitch! Will they be able to catch it, or is it a false alarm yet again?”

Murmurs ripple throughout the crowd; everyone watches with bated breath as Vernon and the Slytherin Seeker lock eyes and dive at the same time, racing towards a nearly invisible flicker of gold with arms outstretched. Above them, the game continues; Hyunjin makes a desperate pass after being nearly shoved off, Jun catches it and is about to do a sharp left turn towards the right hoop —

“Oh, hell no,” Wonwoo whispers.

The four of you watch in horror as Jun fails to look out for his right side this time, and the Bludger hits him just at the top of his shoulder, the side of his face taking the brunt of it immediately after. The force pushes him clean off his broom, falling off sideways, and there’s blood starting to trickle from his face, staining his robes.

From the other side of the pitch, there are triumphant shouts from the crowd as the Snitch is held up in the air by the Slytherin Seeker, a slender black-haired boy. Vernon isn’t there; you see him fly to Jun’s aid as his teammates slow his fall before he hits the ground. Everyone converges on him, someone calls for Madam Pomfrey, and you decide you have to see him now.

Seungcheol clears the way for you, tall and broad, and you break through the rows with the others in tow, running across the muddy field until you reach the players huddled in a circle.

“Is he okay? What’s going on?” you ask a worried-looking Vernon, clutching his broomstick. 

“Er… well, he’s unconscious,” the younger boy tells you. “And he’s bleeding. They got him pretty good.”

“What?” You push past more of his teammates, hand flying up to cover your mouth at the sight of his bruised face and bleeding ear, shoulder clearly dislocated at the angle he was hit. His eyes are closed, knocked out by the clean swing to the head — you know that he’ll be fine, that Madam Pomfrey’s magic will heal him up soon and it’s not a Muggle injury like the ones you both had faced as young children, but you’re suddenly angry, whirling around with your hand in your pocket.

Hyunjin runs up to the group, having fetched the matron, and you watch them take your best friend up to the hospital wing.

“He’ll be fine,” Joshua says, patting your shoulder. The others nod. “It’s just the usual Bludger injury, just give it a day or two.”

“It’s not,” you seethe. Most of the students are heading back into the castle, and there aren’t any staff around. “Yoon Jeonghan. Where is he?”

“Uh…” Hyunjin gestures to the opposing team. “I reckon he’s over there. Why?”

“That bastard,” you spit, marching over to the group of players in green and silver robes talking amongst themselves seriously. When you approach, you reach for his shoulder, aggressively yanking him around to face you.

There’s an unreadable expression on his face but he immediately schools it, nonchalant and unbothered as ever, looking at you with a calmness that angers you more by the second.

“Can I help you, L/N?”

“You fucking prick,” you yell up at him. “You knew what you were doing, didn’t you? It wasn’t just for the game. You just always have to have the last laugh, right? You just want to win, everything else be damned.”

Jeonghan raises an eyebrow. “I had nothing to do with us winning the match.”

“No, you didn’t,” tears start escaping your eyes from how frustrated and angry you are, “ you didn’t really care about that, did you? You just always have to win against me. You just need a reason, one reason to mess with me and my friends. Am I wrong?”

“Yes…? Look, L/N —”

Before he can finish your sentence, you reach into your robes for your wand, pulling it out in blind rage. Jeonghan realizes what you’re about to do and grabs for his, tucked safely away into one of his pockets, and you both point at each other, incantations on the tips of your tongues —

“Expelliarmus!”

Your wands fly out of your hands as Joshua puts his own away, walking over to you both. “You can’t fight each other here,” he says sternly, “or anywhere else, for that matter. Seriously, have you two ever thought about talking this out and not attempting to kill each other whenever you happen to be in proximity?”

“No,” Jeonghan snorts, and you nod vigorously.

“Well, I won’t have you two dueling on demand. Not on my watch.” 

“But he literally just —!”

The prefect silences you with a shake of his head. “I’d rather not dock points off either of you, so I’ll just let it go this time, but please … I want my friends alive and well and not at each other’s throats constantly.”

You glare at Jeonghan the best you can (if looks could kill, you hope he would be six feet well under) and stalk off to pick up your wand. Wonwoo offers you an empathetic smile.

“Do you want to go visit Jun now?”

“Yeah,” you answer grumpily, turning around to eye your nemesis, surrounded by his team whispering probably about what just happened. Joshua is talking to Seungcheol beside them, presumably waiting for the group to finish their team chat. “I can’t believe he got away with that, Woo.”

“He didn’t break the rules, there wasn’t anything for Hooch to call him out on,” he tells you, putting an arm around your shoulder. “Jun’s gonna be fine, yeah?”

You lean into his side a little, exhausted and still angry. “Okay,” you finally relent, letting him lead you back into the castle. You don’t look back, but the weight of the wand in your pocket is a burning reminder of the boy you can never, and will never, get along with.

It’s late, well past curfew. Jeonghan knows that, and yet he finds himself slipping out of the dungeons, careful not to make a single noise. Joshua doesn’t need to know that he’s chosen to break a few rules again tonight.

He doesn’t even know why he’s doing this, he realizes as he makes his way up the flights of stairs, careful to jump the disappearing step halfway. He shouldn’t be doing this, really, but something in him tells him to. It had bothered him all day — he couldn’t stop thinking about it and it had kept him up, unable to sleep peacefully.

Jeonghan approaches the hospital wing, treading gingerly. The voice in his head telling him to just go back downstairs doesn’t shut up, but that’s more of a reason why he’ll stay. The image of you kneeling over your childhood friend, panic in your eyes, pops into his head first. Then the look on your face, on the verge of tears, as they’d carried him back to the castle. Your icy glare, wand pointed straight ahead.

He shakes these thoughts away, quietly slipping through the curtains. Madam Pomdrey’s quarters are close by, but she won’t hear him, he knows this confidently. Five years is enough for a boy seeking out mischief to figure out how to properly sneak around the castle.

All the beds are empty, except for one. Junhui is propped up on several pillows, right arm in a sling as he rests. The bruises and blood are gone, but Jeonghan knows that the bone damage will take a bit longer to fully heal.

“You know, you’re the last person I expected to be here at this hour.”

Jeonghan startles, a little. Junhui’s eyes are open now, shadowed by the gentle moonlight. “Ah… well, I just …”

“Gave in to your humane tendencies?” Junhui asks dryly, scoffing.

“I guess you could say that.”

“Cut the crap and tell me what you want, Yoon.”

Why’d he come here in the first place? The only thing in Jeonghan’s mind had been your stricken face and a strange guilt in his chest, that’s all.

“I don’t know,” he says finally. “‘Guess I kinda felt bad for, y’know. Smashing your shoulder in and all that.”

“Felt bad for just doing your job on the pitch?”

“... I won’t deny that it was intentional.”

“So I thought.” Junhui hums, lips quirking upwards slightly. “I’m not offended, if you thought I wanted an apology. These things are bound to happen, and anyway, I didn’t really expect much else from someone like you.”

Jeonghan is quiet, not really knowing how to respond. Someone like him… of course, he hadn’t anticipated Junhui’s attitude towards him to be any sort of benevolent at all.

“Cat got your tongue, Yoon? Is that all you wanted to say?”

“Yeah,” he says finally, averting his eyes from the younger boy. “That was it.”

“Alright, then.”

He turns to leave the infirmary, but he barely gets past the curtains before Junhui’s voice stops him again. “Hey, Yoon Jeonghan.”

“Yes?”

“If you really do feel like you owe an apology, you won’t find that person here,” he says lightly. Jeonghan turns, eyeing the boy with suspicion.

“You’re talking about L/N, aren’t you?”

“You tell me.” 

“She isn’t the one who got multiple injuries to the shoulder and face. You are.”

Junhui chuckles softly, laying back again and closing his eyes. “Huh. Maybe there is a heart in there after all. Way, way deep down in that twisted little soul of yours, in your own twisted little way.”

Jeonghan rolls his eyes, already irritated. He should probably leave before he says something he’s sure to regret later. “I’m leaving,” he replies shortly. “Don’t die, Wen.”

“I’ll do my best.”

That trip to the hospital wing doesn’t help him at all in terms of sleep. In fact, Jeonghan stays up nearly all night, just contemplating. Thinking. Tossing and turning around in his bed. And for some reason, you plague his mind more than he would ever like to admit.

You and Jeonghan don’t really speak much after that incident, not even to strike a nerve now and then in passing. Autumn leaves fall and the first snow arrives with a strange peace of mind that you aren’t used to having since you stepped foot into the castle as a first-year.

Jun, all healed and in prime Chasing shape now, has certainly noticed the change in demeanor.

“Did he finally decide to stop bothering you?” he questions one day when you’re both seated in the library. The Slytherin in question is just a table over with Joshua and Seungcheol, immersed in reading a large textbook. “Has it finally happened?”

“I mean, I guess so,” you say, brows furrowed. “He’s gone radio silent on me for the past month and a half now.”

“You should be celebrating!”

You should. You nearly did, when you first realized that he’d started leaving you alone more, but then it had felt weird to be able to just mind your own business in Potions without those biting remarks you used to receive on the daily.

“Yeah, whatever,” you say, going back to your half-finished Potions essay. “C’mon, focus, Jun. How are we gonna pass the O.W.L.s if we can’t even score an Excellent on one of these darned essays?”

“But I don’t even get why you can’t put dittany and fluxweed in the cauldron together,” he whines. “Slughorn didn’t even bother explaining. He just said something along the lines of ‘do it but at your own risk’ and that doesn’t really help.”

Wonwoo sighs, slouched over in his chair with a novel in hand. “Why don’t you just pay attention in class instead of bickering with each other?”

“His fault!”

“Her fault!”

He sighs again, adjusting his glasses. “I turned it in yesterday, so I can’t remember exactly what I wrote, but the gist of it is that it’ll cause an explosion and if any of it gets on your skin it’ll give you a nasty rash.”

“Leave it to you to do the homework super early,” Jun grumbles. “So unhelpful.”

“No, I’m just responsible.”

You manage to write another few inches of your essay while Jun gets lectured, and when he leaves for Quidditch practice, Wonwoo rises to go too.

“I’ve got to tutor a few first years for Transfiguration in a few minutes,” he says apologetically. “Or I’d have stayed a bit longer.”

You wave him off with a smile, telling him you’ll see him at dinner, and he’s gone, leaving you alone at your table. Not for long however, when someone taps on your shoulder a few seconds later.

“Hey,” Joshua grins, standing over you, “wanna come join us? You seem a bit lonely, plus I feel like I’m going to lose my mind with these two dimwits if I don’t have a voice of reason here.”

Your eyes flicker to Jeonghan, arguing with Seungcheol about something. You want to say no but you end up agreeing anyway, pulling your stuff and a chair over to the empty spot at their table, Jeonghan directly in front of you.

“What did he do?” you ask your friend quietly.

“Oh, Cheol is convinced Jeonghan used an Auto-Answer quill on the Herbology homework and his Gryffindor pride won’t let him just forget about it,” Joshua rolls his eyes. “This is my day to day reality, in case you were wondering. It’s not fun.”

“Well, he probably shouldn’t be using one anyways … so much for being Prefect,” you tease. “Didn’t you say anything to him about it?”

“The world won’t end if a bloke slacks off a little every once in a while. I might be a prefect, but I’m not a stickler for the rules when it’s as harmless as this .”

“Maybe you should have been in Slytherin.”

“That’s what I keep telling him!” Seungcheol exclaims. “He likes to pretend he’s so much better than us, but morally he’s at the same level as this one,” he says, jabbing Jeonghan in the shoulder.

The latter doesn’t reply, just stares you down, eyebrows furrowed. “What’s she doing here?”

“I asked her to come sit with us because her friends left,” Joshua says patiently. “Please tell me you’re going to let it be and not cause a scene.”

“Why didn’t you just leave her alone?”

“I’m right here,” you interrupt, irritated. “You can talk to me, you ass.”

Jeonghan scoffs quietly. “And why would I want to do that?”

“Here we go again,” Seungcheol mutters, slouching further in the chair and hiding his face behind the newest edition of Hogwarts: A History.

The Slytherin’s nonchalant attitude makes you furious, anger bubbling up through your chest. 

“What is wrong with you? You suddenly decide out of nowhere that you’re going to be a decent person and leave me the hell alone, fine, but the second we have to coexist you start picking a fight with me? Are you serious?”

Joshua sighs. “Guys, please don’t get us kicked out of here —”

“I didn’t say you couldn’t be here, I just asked why. If anything, you’re the one picking a fight right now,” Jeonghan points out coolly, and you keep your mouth shut for the sole reason that the number of expletives you have ready would definitely get you banned from the library for life.

Seungcheol straightens suddenly, trying to change the mood. “Okay, um, has anyone started the essay Binns assigned? ‘Cause I have no idea what I’m doing whatsoever and he will probably be able to tell while grading my work.”

“I already wrote it. Here, let me see what you have so far,” you offer, glad to think about something, anything else. You scan his parchment and find several mistakes (“A troll, Choi, not a house elf”), correcting them as you go.

“You should come to the next game,” he says, taking his essay back with a grateful smile. “Gryffindor against Hufflepuff. You’ll get to see us beat Josh to the ground,” he jokes.

“Cheol, don’t you make Quidditch a personal problem!”

You chuckle. “I’ll come, I suppose, but who am I supposed to support?”

“Me,” Joshua says immediately, “because I’ve been your friend since first year and you’ve barely spoken to him, like, ever.”

“Maybe I’ll do what you did and show up in both colors,” you counter. “Two-timer.”

“I told you the night before that I can never pick a side!”

Seungcheol joins you in laughing at him — oh, it feels so good to truly let yourself feel happy for a minute without worrying about everyone else all the time. Sure, you can still feel Jeonghan’s eyes burning into you, but you refuse to look. You refuse to give him the time of day when he treats you like trash and can’t decide whether he wants to be tolerable or a downright jackass.

Maybe someday in the future, once you’re older and out of Hogwarts, you’ll see this as a stupid rift between schoolmates, futile grudges you’re both holding that won’t ever matter in the grand scheme of things. But now, sitting in the library, it’s anything but. 

This is real time, and you are in it. And you are determined to detest Yoon Jeonghan with all of your heart, more than anything else.

It’s extremely late by the time Seungcheol manages to finish his essay with the help of his friends, just a bit before curfew. You’d left a while ago for dinner — thank Merlin for that, Jeonghan thinks — and hadn’t returned, probably to get a head start on other homework.

You are a Ravenclaw, after all. He wouldn’t really expect much else.

So you’d gone, bidding his friends goodbye and promising them both different things, telling Joshua you’d meet him for his evening rounds tomorrow and agreeing to show up for Saturday’s Quidditch game. And that had been all. You hadn’t even spared a look in his direction, let alone spoken to him for a moment.

Pity. He would have liked to crack that smile at you once again, the one he knows will rile you up instantly, but he hadn’t had the chance.

“Why do you even like Y/N so much?” he asks Joshua as they’re heading back, once Seungcheol waves them off with a quick goodnight and turns towards Gryffindor Tower.

“You know, she asked me the same thing back at the beginning of the year,” Joshua chuckles. “Sounded as confused as you do, too.”

“What’d you tell her?”

“That you’re my friend and somehow, somewhere, there is a heart of gold hiding under that pretentious dickhead image you have,” he replies, “and in response to you I’ll say nearly the same thing, except that Y/N doesn’t have a pretentious dickhead image to begin with.”

“That’s such a lie, and you know it.”

“No, I don’t, because as much as you like to deny it, she’s genuinely a good person,” Joshua rolls his eyes. “And as much as you enjoy acting like she’s always uptight and defensive — don’t look at me like that, you’ve said those exact words before — you clearly haven’t interacted much outside of those rows you guys used to have every other day.”

“Used to have,” Jeonghan echoes.

“Yeah, I’m glad you chose to lay off her for a bit, because you were starting to be kind of a dick,” Joshua admits. “I don’t think Y/N’s exactly right either when she’s badmouthing you, and I do defend you when I can get a word in, but you honestly did start most of your arguments so I can’t really say anything as far as that goes.”

The past tense doesn’t go over Jeonghan’s head. He hadn’t really meant to let you be; sure, it seemed like a blessing to fellow classmates and teachers alike (Merlin knows Professor Longbottom was sick of your spontaneous quarrels during class) but it wasn’t intentional on his part.

Somehow it just … happened. After visiting Junhui in the infirmary that night, he stopped going out of his way to bother you. You weighed on his conscience all the time anyways, he didn’t need you in his daily life to add to that. 

Ah, but he shouldn’t be feeling bad for you. Why would he, when he’s the reason you suffer? Jeonghan hasn’t stopped bugging you for five years now, always at odds with you; it’s a game of careful balance, a perpetual back and forth that amuses him endlessly, and he’s never stopped. 

It’s become something like a constant in his life, and perhaps yours as well. Something he can count on to always be present. It doesn’t matter if he’s just lost a match, or struggled in Transfiguration (not that he’d ever let that slip to you) — you’re always there, he can always fire off a sarcastic one-liner, and the rest is as usual.

Maybe he’ll stop now. Maybe it’s good for him to stop now, too, and get you off his mind in the process.

“Hello? Earth to Jeonghan!” Joshua is laughing at him when he finally focuses on his friend. “What were you daydreaming about?”

“Nothing. Just … stuff.”

“Stuff,” Joshua repeats, eyebrows raised. “Alright, mate, have fun pondering stuff. I’ll see you at breakfast, Han. Don’t stay up too late, okay?”

When he leaves, Jeonghan is left alone there, just him and his confused mind.  Maybe someday he’ll figure it out. But right now he disappears into the shadows of the staircase, down towards the dungeons.

He’ll think about it later. Tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is another day.

“What was the ingredient Slughorn told us to substitute for the asphodel last week?”

“You seriously don’t know?”

“Why do you think I’m asking you, L/N?”

“Fine. Crushed firefly wings.”

“... Thanks.”

“What?”

“I said, thanks.”

“Oh. Well… you’re welcome.”

At some point in the middle of the week before O.W.L.s, Yoon Jeonghan realizes that maybe you’re not as horrible as he’d originally thought.

Something in him hates that the idea of you being around doesn’t really disgust him like it used to. As for you being on his mind more often than not, he’s already come to terms with it. After all, five years of arguing with someone might as well form a connection, who knows?

Now, though, he really watches you — not with the critical eye he’s used countless times before, the one he used to catch your every flaw and mistake. No, he just watches you exist and float around your friends, doing what you can.

And maybe he was a bit wrong when he called you stuck up, because you readily help Joshua with any questions, you make your friends feel at ease when they aren’t sure about something they’ve learned. Maybe he was a bit wrong when he called you defensive, and foolish, and stupid, because you’re slowly proving that you’re anything but.

Actually, it might have been there all along, but he’s selectively chosen to ignore anything positive about you in all the time he’s known you, so who is he to complain, really?

He catches you early to Potions one day, talking casually with your friends in the corner. You see him enter and the both of you greet each other with a curt nod. Which is strange, he knows — he sees Junhui whisper something to you, brows furrowed. He wonders what it is; Junhui is somewhat interesting, he’s decided after that conversation they’d had that night in the hospital wing.

When you finally leave your buddies and move your stuff to the table you’re both seated at now, Jeonghan already has his supplies out, parchment and notes on the desk as he rummages through his bag for something to write with. You’re looking him dead in the eye as he straightens.

“D’you need a quill, or?”

He blinks. There it is again, your constant kindness. Now that he’s subject to it, he wonders why exactly he didn’t really notice it before.

“Er, yeah, I suppose.”

Your skin brushes against his fingers lightly as you pass it to him, for a moment, and that’s all. You don’t look or speak to him again that class, but he feels like he’s starting to see you in a new light. 

A part of him hates it. (He realizes he doesn’t entirely hate it.)

Potions is over before he knows it, the time flying faster than it usually does. You end up leaving the room before he can return the quill he’d borrowed, basically bolting out the door. Whatever, he thinks, he’ll see you again. He can give it back to you another day.

Later that night, he’s using it to do homework in the library with his friends when Joshua makes a noise of disbelief in the back of his throat. 

“What?” Jeonghan queries.

“How’d you have that?”

“Borrowed a quill from L/N during Potions. Why?”

Joshua gives him an odd look. “That’s her favorite quill,” he says slowly. “The one with the golden stripes and gray end. She loves that one to death.”

“... Oh.”

Jeonghan isn’t sure why, but this manages to warm his heart a little. The gold speckles on the feathers shine under the light as he twirls it between his fingers, and every time he sees you after that he conveniently forgets to remind you to take it back. 

Maybe he just likes how it looks when he writes with it. Maybe he just wants to carry a piece of you with him even when you’re not around.

At some point in the middle of the week before O.W.L.s, you realize that maybe Yoon Jeonghan isn’t as horrible as you’d originally thought.

For one, he’s started being somewhat decent to you, which is a step up from pretending you don’t exist and a great leap from treating you like absolute trash whenever you’re around him. You don’t miss the subtle manners directed towards you in class, and in passing, and sometimes it makes you pause and rethink. 

More startling is his newly evident courtesy towards your best friend. The first time you saw them acknowledge each other without a scowl or smirk on either of their faces, you nearly passed out from shock.

“What the hell was that?” you had asked Jun. “What just happened?”

“I greeted a classmate?”

“Dude, you’ve hated him for almost as long as I have.”

“You never know, Y/N. Some people might not be worth hating after all.”

“Oh wow, so vague and mysterious, you’re really helping, Jun.”

Wonwoo had laughed at the both of you, telling you to stay focused on getting to class, and that had been it. At the moment. You still think about it from time to time, wondering what could have caused this change in demeanor.

And you start changing yours as well, because deep down, you know it would be unnecessarily mean of you to be rude to someone who seems like they’re trying to be polite. So… you return the favor, answering questions about class and lending quills and parchment. You’re civil, he’s civil, and things seem to be going smoothly.

Jeonghan almost makes you think you had been wrong about him from the start. But that’s not possible… is it? You find yourself thinking about him too often these days, but you still can’t figure him out, and it irks you to no end.

A part of you hates it. (You realize you don’t entirely hate it.)

The week you were supposed to spend studying turns into a week of you grappling with your conflicting feelings about a certain Slytherin that’s been plaguing your mind lately, a game you’re playing within your own head. Forget the Silencing Charm, forget the Draught of Living Death — you’re analyzing his behavior patterns, overthinking every single moment of your interactions.

You decide, in the end, that you don’t really hate Yoon Jeonghan anymore. You don’t tell Jun or Wonwoo, or Joshua, just a little secret for you and yourself. Something about it feels wrong, after so many years of hating and hating and hating, but you’re sure that you’ve never made a choice so right. 

You hope you’re right.

The O.W.L.s pass by with minimal stress and satisfying results, all the fifth years in the castle free for a while to do whatever in their spare time as a small reward for the grueling exam week. Wonwoo has taken up his broomstick again, joining Jun and a few other friends in small games of Quidditch when the weather is nice out. You like to sit and watch as they fly in loops through the air, often bringing with you a small book or some work to do as you keep them company from afar.

Sometimes Jeonghan decides to join the ruckus in the air. Sometimes, he decides to join you. You never know why, and you never question it, reveling in the novelty of coexisting without chaos.

It’s strange now though, the silence that passes between the both of you as you sit there doing your own thing. You aren’t used to the peace and quiet still, eyes darting to his figure hunched over a book every now and then.

Something catches your eye as he moves to write again. “Is that my quill?” you blurt out.

He stops writing, examining the feather between his fingers. “Oh … yeah, I think it’s the one you lent me in class a while ago.”

“Yeah, maybe — no, it’s okay, you can keep it. I’ve got plenty of others,” you say rushedly when he offers it back to you. “It wasn’t anything special.”

Jeonghan raises an eyebrow, bangs curving over his forehead. “Joshua said that it’s your favorite quill.”

Damn you, Joshua Hong. “It looks just like all my other ones,” you defend. “I’ll live without it.”

He merely shrugs, returning to his work. “If you say so.”

You watch him continue writing with it, the ink flowing from the tip and some of it getting smeared on the sides of his fingers. He’s right, it is your favorite quill, the one with golden speckles and a more comfortable feel than the other ones. But you would rather not have it back once he’s already had it in his hands. After all, both of you had forgotten, so why should it matter now?

Up above you, Wonwoo accidentally flies straight into Seungcheol’s back, and the latter hollers at him in response. Tearing your eyes off of them, you observe Jeonghan for a few seconds before asking a question that’s been weighing on your mind for quite a while.

“Why do you hate me so much?”

Jeonghan stills, quill halting. He looks directly at you — he’s straightforward like that, never beating around the bush — and just stares for a second. You wonder if he has always looked this good under the afternoon sunlight, his features softer as he gazes at you now.

He looks like he might say something, lips moving around unspoken words, but they close at the last second as he lets out a quiet scoff. With a quick shake of his head, he’s back at his parchment again, scribbling away. 

The gesture stings as vexation blossoms in your chest. He was being polite, he was being kind almost, and yet he deems you not even worth a response to what is probably one of the most valid questions you could ask. It feels like a slap in the face, and you can feel your eyes welling up already, just threatening to spill onto your cheeks.

Not that you care, of course. Tears of frustration are far more familiar to you than tears of sadness, and this is most definitely the former.

You can’t stand to be around him again, not when his actions are so push and pull, so you grab your stuff into your arms and stand up suddenly, ready to leave.

“L/N.”  Jeonghan tries again when you don’t reply. “Where are you going?”

Oh, so now he cares, you think, suppressing the urge to roll your eyes. You don’t bother giving him a response, choosing to ignore his words as you leave the stands as quickly as you can. You hear him call out again, your first name from his mouth this time (he’s never called you that, it was always L/N with him, and it almost makes you stop and turn), but you keep going towards the castle. 

Maybe you were wrong about being wrong — the idea of it nearly makes you laugh. Perhaps it’s time to just accept that some people might just never change.

“So you just let her leave?”

Jeonghan scowls at his best friend, fighting the urge to throw a pillow at him. The three of them are in the Gryffindor common room, sprawled across Seungcheol’s bed, talking about the most recent happenings in Jeonghan’s life. 

“What was I supposed to do, tackle her to the ground?”

Joshua leans his head into his palm. “I think a better question is, how exactly do you feel about her right now?”

“... What are you insinuating?”

“Answer my question first and maybe you’ll find out.”

Jeonghan sighs. “I don’t know what you want me to say. There’s no huge shocking revelation or whatever,” he explains. “I just… don’t hate her. That’s all.”

“You hated her, and now you don’t, so clearly there’s been some type of change,” Seungcheol points out. “So you figure out what changed, and whether you like it or not.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever hated her,” Jeonghan says slowly, just as the realization pops into his head. “I don’t know why she asked me that. I didn’t have an answer.”

His friends are quiet for a second. “Merlin, you’re dense,” Joshua observes. “Tell her exactly what you just told us! Are you kidding?”

“Yeah, no.”

“Why not?”

“Because then I’ll come across as some weirdo! How do you think that would go? ‘Hey, I’ve been a total prick to you for the past five years but I actually don’t hate you like you thought I do’, is that what you want me to say?”

“Yeah? What could go wrong with that? What are you afraid of?”

“That’s just out of my comfort zone, mate.”

Joshua lets out a hearty laugh. “C’mon, Han. Since when were you restricted to a comfort zone regarding anything?”

He doesn’t know. He didn’t think he was, but recently things have changed so much that he doesn’t really know what he’s doing, isn’t even sure where exactly he stands with you anymore. Everything was perfectly stable, but now he’s been shaken up. Uncertain. If there’s anything Jeonghan hates, it’s the uncertainty of his situation right now.

That uncertainty does nothing but grow with each passing day he spends in your vicinity.

At first it’s the little actions, the kind things you’ve always done for people but never directed towards him until now, and it’s now that he learns to appreciate the gestures he’d thought absolutely nothing of before. It goes from silently accepting your offered notes during Charms to watching you chase Wonwoo around the Great Lake, the sun illuminating your already bright smile. 

Jeonghan wonders why he’d never noticed this, you, before. (He wonders why the sight has his heart pounding in his chest.)

When the first columbines bloom in the spring, you’re there among them in a pretty maroon sundress on the weekends, casting away your usual robes as well as your worries, laughing and talking to your friends. He often happens to see you there, eyes finding you involuntarily as he’s walking across the grounds. 

Sometimes yours meet his in return, and the tentative greeting you give him is enough to send his brain into a tailspin for the next few minutes.

It gets so bad, so confusing, that he decides to sit his friends down again and brief them about his dilemma, hoping for some advice and support. All they do, however, is stare at him like he’s a complete idiot.

“Fuckin’ knew it,” Seungcheol claps excitedly.

“Knew what, exactly?”

“You think she’s cute, don’t ya?”

Jeonghan rolls his eyes, cheeks heating up. “Cheol, I am going to hex you into next week if you don’t stop jumping to conclusions.”

“I’m not jumping anywhere. You literally gave us all we have to know!”

Joshua sighs, watching the back and forth. “The answer is right here, Han, and maybe you would see it if your head weren’t so far up your ass and you would actually face the facts for once.”

Of course Joshua has to be reasonable, and most of the time, right. “And what are those facts?”

“You don’t hate her, correct?”

“Correct.”

“And now you’re telling us that she’s really nice, and pretty, and is aware of your presence, but you refuse to actually talk about it and freak out every time we suggest confronting her?”

“I don’t freak out!”

“Sure,” Joshua snorts. “Your whole world view of Y/N flipped completely over the span of like, five months, Han. How much longer are you going to keep telling yourself no when your heart is clearly screaming yes?”

Silence. Jeonghan blinks once, twice, still taking in the words. He tries his best to suppress it, but he feels something in his chest shift at the thought of you again and there’s no denying it anymore. He looks at Seungcheol, and then Joshua, eyes impossibly wide.

“Fuck.”

You’re busy sending a letter back home in the Owlery, updating your sisters and parents on some important things and responding to a message from your older brother when someone joins you in the room, quietly shuffling around among the school owls. A glimpse of green and silver, and the signature messy black hair, tells you exactly who it is.

Sending off the little pygmy owl with a gentle scratch behind the ears, you’re ready to go, fully prepared to walk past the person behind you, but he’s blocking your path when you turn around, arms folded as he stares you down.

You sigh, mirroring his stance. “What do you want, Yoon?”

“Why are you so quick to leave?” he counters confidently. Something about it is different now though, less cocky than usual and maybe a smidge more sincere. “Can’t stand being in the same room as me that bad, huh?”

“You of all people should know that,” you seethe. “You can’t just go back and forth between being nice and then being a complete dick. Maybe just make up your mind for once, okay? Just settle with hating me if that’s what you want to do so much.”

Jeonghan is silent. You take that as your cue to leave and angrily attempt to walk past him, but he stops you gently with an outstretched arm. 

“Y/N,” he says quietly, looking down. “I don’t hate you.”

“Yeah, right. You’re clearly lying.”

“I don’t,” he repeats, letting go of you now. You make no move to leave, and he looks relieved, almost. “I never have.”

“Yoon Jeonghan, this is a terrible idea for a —”

“It’s not a prank,” he insists, brows furrowed. “God, Y/N, I’m serious. I don’t hate you, and I know I acted like it for the longest time, but shit, it’s not true, I just … I —”

“You what, Jeonghan?” you ask, his name rolling off your tongue for the first time, easily, like it was always meant to be. Something softens in your chest, the frustration and bitterness of the past few days ebbing away slowly.

He just shakes his head like he’s dismissing the unspoken thought. “I’ve never felt that way towards you, Y/N, even though you have. It’s not true, I want you to know that.”

This comes as news to you at the same time that it doesn’t. Somehow you always knew that whatever was between you two, it wasn’t pure hatred. If he hated you, he wouldn’t have chosen to interact with you every single day, and if you’d felt the same you wouldn’t have let him in the first place. It takes two to tango, after all.

“I haven’t either,” you admit, putting aside any inhibitions you might have had and looking him directly in the eye. “I know I behaved that way for a while, too, but I don’t. I’m telling you just … just so you don’t think I totally despise your guts or anything.”

Your confidence makes him falter for a second, but his mouth lifts into that telltale smile again. Not so self-assured as it used to be, but softer now, more gentle and warm. “Does that mean I can keep bothering you during class then?”

“No,” you insist sternly, trying to keep back a tiny smile of your own. “It just means I don’t necessarily think you’re the worst person ever. And I won’t try to hex you when you aren’t looking.”

Jeonghan laughs, a quiet, lovely chuckle. He looks even better when he’s happy, you notice, his handsome features and the curve of his lips heightened by the mirth in his face.

“I’ll take it.”

“Well, it looks like you have a letter to send, so I’ll be going,” you laugh nervously, gesturing towards the piece of parchment tucked into his elbow. “See you around, I guess.”

He nods in agreement, stepping towards the window as you leave, heart thumping so loud in your chest that you wonder whether he can hear it from his place in the room, but he calls for you again before you go. You’re met with a brilliant smile and twinkling eyes when you turn and face him, raising an eyebrow in question.

“You should use my actual name more, Y/N. It sounds good coming from you.”

Jeonghan has never, ever had a jealous streak as far as he can remember. Until now.

He can’t help the way his jaw tenses at the sight of that Gryffindor boy who keeps hanging around you these days, one of Seungcheol’s Quidditch teammates, the one with the loud voice and obnoxious laugh. He can’t remember his name — Chanyoung? Sooho? — but all he knows is that he doesn’t like it when you laugh at any of his stupid jokes, or greet him with your pretty smile in the mornings at breakfast.

Naturally, he decides to interfere in his own way. The next time he sees the guy hovering by you and your friends, he marches right over, sidling up to you and slipping an arm around your shoulder as he takes the seat next to you. 

You just gape at him, taken completely by surprise. “Jeonghan, what—?”

He ignores the sudden rush he feels when you say his name and focuses on the baffled dude standing in front of him. “Hey, man,” he says casually, sizing him up. “What’s going on?”

You give Jeonghan a warning look. “Nothing’s happening. Soonyoung and I were just talking.”

Ah, so that’s his name. Vaguely, he remembers Seungcheol mentioning him several times here and there while discussing game strategy, praising him for his clever plays. 

“Oh? Do enlighten me. I love a good little conversation,” he says, smirking at Soonyoung.

The poor guy looks awfully confused, eyes darting between the two of you uncertainly.

“Oh. Well … I was just about to ask Y/N if she wanted to, you know, go to the end of year ball together in a few weeks. Like, as friends.” He looks hopefully at you, but Jeonghan cuts in before you can make a response.

“Sorry, but she’s actually already going with me,” he says, arm tightening ever so slightly around you. 

“I am?” you ask, at the same time that Wonwoo chokes on his pumpkin juice and Jun lets out an incredulous “She is?!”

“Yeah,” Jeonghan confirms, still not looking directly at you. “Sorry, mate. Maybe next time. We’ll let you know if it doesn’t work out, yeah?”

“Uh… okay? Wait —”

“Soonyoung,” you interrupt with a sigh, “You should go eat something. I’ll see you in Divination later today, okay?”

He takes the hint and leaves, bidding you a hasty farewell, and you immediately turn to Jeonghan. “What the hell was that?”

“Were you seriously about to go out with Kwon Soonyoung?”

You roll your eyes at him, and Jeonghan thinks it’s extremely fucking cute, pulling his arm back to lean it against the table. “One ball doesn’t mean anything, okay? Plus, I didn’t even say anything to him. You answered for me! What’s so bad about him, anyways?”

“Nothing really,” Jeonghan shrugs, trying not to waver under your insistent eyes. “But would you really pass me up for some fourth-year Keeper like him?”

“If you haven’t noticed, trying to purposefully murder people on the pitch isn’t exactly the most glorious position either.”

Jun raises his fork from your other side in support. “Hell yeah to that,” he says, but even so, he meets Jeonghan’s gaze over your head and gives him a thumbs up, his silent and steadfast approval.

“Right, but now you’re sort of stuck with me,” Jeonghan tells you. “Because if I’m not wrong, the Gryffindor table has already started talking, and soon enough it’ll be the whole school.”

“Don’t you think it might cause several shock-related deaths if we show up together and not at each other’s throats?”

“True, but what’s a formal school event without a little bit of mischief?”

“Go to your table, Jeonghan,” is what you reply with, but there’s something in the way you say it that makes him think that maybe, just maybe, he has you convinced, and that’s enough for him. Before his courage fails him and he ends up backing out, he leans in to give your cheek a quick, soft kiss and walks straight to the Slytherin table before either of you can react to what just happened.

He doesn’t look back. He thinks his heart might explode if he does.

“Are you actually going with him?”

“Did he just ask you out?”

“When did you guys stop wanting to kill each other?”

“Do you have a dress in mind yet?”

You raise your hands in defeat. “Guys, slow down,” you say to Joshua and Jun. “Please. I’m going to develop a headache if you keep at it.”

Wonwoo raises his head from the novel he’s been reading. “Already got one over here, you’re kind of late to the game.”

“Anyways,” you continue, leaning back against the tree trunk, “Maybe, I don’t know, a while ago, and definitely not. In that order.”

“I already forgot what I asked,” Jun says sheepishly. “Start from the beginning, please. Like, when did you realize that you’re actually completely in love with him?”

“I’m not!” you protest, but your unsure voice and pink cheeks give it away.

“You so are! Look, Wonwoo, she’s blushing, isn’t she?”

The boy decides to put away his book, crossing his legs and looking at you amusedly. “You are,” he acknowledges. “You have so many tells, it’s pretty easy for us to read you. Are you just going to keep denying it, or what?”

“I’m seriously not! I’m not in love with him,” you say, fingers toying with the hem of your robes. “But… maybe, well,” your voice drops to a whisper. “I might like him.”

Your friends let out loud cheers that have several passing students glancing at them like they’ve been possessed by hippogriffs. “There we go,” Joshua says happily. “It’s about time, too.”

“Just a little bit!” you add indignantly. “Just a little, okay? Like extremely little.”

“That’s not what it looks like to me!” He laughs at the mess that you are right now, flustered and unsure how to proceed. “Okay, so are you going to the ball with him or not? Because you kind of have to decide at this point.”

“Do I? I don’t even know what those theatrics were. Probably another one of his pranks, you know he likes messing with the underclassmen now and then.”

“Are you serious?” Joshua leans in like he’s telling you a secret. “He was definitely trying to ask you, Y/N. Have you ever seen him make a move like that before?”

He’s right, you haven’t, but you aren’t sure what to do now that you’re in this situation. If you say yes, will he laugh it off and say he was just joking? If you turn it down, will you lose a chance at becoming something more than just halfway to friends?

“No,” you say slowly. 

“So, the ball’s in your court now,” Joshua explains. “Up to you whether you wanna go. But after your confession just now, I think we all know the answer to that, don’t we?”

You do, it’s sitting right there in front of you, but you’re not sure how to even digest how drastically your relationship with Jeonghan has changed over the course of the year. In a good way, certainly, but it almost gives you whiplash and a little voice in your conscience keeps injecting worst-case scenarios into your head. 

What if it’s all a joke? What if it was just a setup to make you look like a complete fool?

“I’m a little scared,” you admit. “I’ve spent five years distrusting and being at odds with him, and now I have to actually bare my heart and feelings to the same person. It’s… new.”

Wonwoo offers you a comforting smile. “It’ll always be new, no matter what. As long as it’s a good kind of new. This is good, right?”

“And if it isn’t for some reason, you’ve got us,” Jun adds.

You nod at them gratefully, thumb running across the seams on the inside of the edges of your robes. Yes, it’ll be a good thing — you’ll make it a good thing. After all, you’ve spent five years of this in bitter feelings and volatile anger. It’s time something good happened for both of you anyways.

Fifteen minutes until you have to meet Jeonghan in the Great Hall, sparkling and made up to perfection, and you already feel like your stomach is churning.

“Jun, I’m going to throw up,” you say as he helps you pin some of your hair back, the rest loose against your neck and shoulders. “Maybe I should just —”

“You are not skipping,” he says firmly. “You look wonderful, your dress is perfect, and the guy will be waiting for you in the hall so you’re not gonna stand him up, do you hear me?”

“Loud and clear,” you groan, looking at yourself again in the mirror. You look quite nice, but you’ve never gone to one of these balls before, always opting out to spend the time with your friends in the common room or strolling around the castle. 

This is different, though. Tonight you want to look your best, be your best. Jeonghan has seen you at pretty much your worst most of the time anyways, so you figure it’s about time you show him a different side to you anyways. The thought of him alone makes you a little fidgety; you wonder how he’ll look in dress robes under the shimmering chandeliers, yours for the evening.

When you finally enter the Hall, your friends in tow, you’re swarmed by classmates greeting and complimenting you on your first appearance since you’ve started school. Several girls from your Transfiguration class ask you about your dress and request makeup tips, and you direct them to Jun, who had taken up the role of your stylist for this particular event.

The group dissipates soon enough, and as you search the sea of students milling around you meet Jeonghan’s eyes somewhere in the middle. They light up when you find them, and he starts making his way towards you, navigating through the rest of the attendees.

Jun nudges your shoulder. “Time to go see your man. Go kill it, okay?”

“Let us know if you need anything,” Wonwoo waves as they both slip away together conveniently, just as Jeonghan gets to you. 

He stops short once you’re fully in his line of sight, taking you in silently. You’re flustered under his sudden and quiet gaze, smoothing down the fabric of your deep maroon dress and adjusting the puffy tulle sleeves on your shoulders. 

“Pretty,” he remarks after several seconds, clearing his throat and offering you his hand. “You, uh. You’re really pretty.”

“Thanks,” you squeak out. Breathe, Y/N. Stay calm, you tell yourself as you slip your hand into his. It’s warm and comfortable, and it pulls at your heartstrings when he closes his fingers around yours, holding them securely. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

Your words seem to put him at ease; he runs a hand through his hair as a roguish grin appears on his face.

“Glad to hear it,” he answers, tugging you gently away from the center of the hallway. He looks devastatingly handsome like this under the lighting, looking at you with a strange fondness that hasn’t been there before. A good new thing, you decide. 

When he reaches for you, you hesitate, the two of you swaying gently to the beat. “Jeonghan,” you murmur, “I can’t really dance.”

“Neither can I,” he admits, pulling you to him. “I’ve got two left feet, so I guess we’ll just wing this, yeah?”

Your feet move at random, but in sync and together as he whirls you across the dance floor, giggling when you accidentally step on his toes multiple times in the process. You get stares from the couples that actually do know how to dance and are doing it correctly (that quickly turn into hushed whispers when they realize that it’s the two of you that are together), but it’s not like you care, not while you’re having the time of your life doing Merlin knows what with Jeonghan’s arm around your waist.

It feels different, good. You feel happy and free, like your heart has sprouted wings and has taken flight.

After a few songs, it changes to something much more lively, and you move away from the crowd of dancing students, depleted of energy for now. You’ve just downed a glass of ice cold water when Jeonghan approaches, leaning in to whisper into your ear.

“Should we get out of here?” His voice sends a tingle down your spine, lips so close to your mouth that if you turned a little you’d be able to kiss him right there. “Not like that,” he laughs, looking at your incredulous expression. “Just away from all the sweat and grime and loud noise. I can barely hear you from here right now.”

“You don’t wanna hang out with your friends?”

He gestures towards Joshua, currently trying to catch the interest of a girl sitting by the fireplace, and to where a group of sixth-year Hufflepuffs are trying to get Seungcheol to get on the dance floor.

“I don’t think they’ll miss us just yet,” he says. “We’ll be back before they know it.”

Laughing, you let him lead you away, out of the hall and through several stairways until you’re out in the open air. You raise an eyebrow at him when he turns to face you.

“I thought students weren’t allowed at the Astronomy Tower outside of classes?”

Jeonghan merely winks at you, beckoning for you to come closer. “It’s my favorite place in the whole castle,” he says. “And since when have I followed rules like that anyways?”

“Classic,” you respond, drawing a snort out of him. You follow him to the railing, looking out over the grounds and then up into the sky where the moon shines down on Hogwarts, the stars accompanying it with their gentle light. It’s beautiful from up here; you can understand why he treasures this place so much.

“You know, I didn’t expect you to actually agree to come with me tonight.”

“After creating such a scene during breakfast? You yourself told me I had no way out after the word spread like wildfire.”

“You could have said no. It was always your choice.” Jeonghan turns to look at you, beautiful under the night sky. “And I had to go about it in such an underhanded way, so that I didn’t look like a fool in front of you. I couldn’t just come out and say what I had in mind.”

“Which was?”

He hesitates for a moment. “That I really wanted you to go with me and not Kwon Soonyoung,” he says quietly. “That I liked you then, and I still do now. You would have thought I was crazy if I’d said all that, so I didn’t.”

The confession gives you a strange courage, emboldening you enough to place a careful hand on his arm. “Would you think the same if I said that I like you, too?”

Jeonghan’s jaw drops momentarily, searching your eyes for any sign of a joke. “Are you serious?”

“Yeah. Then and now,” you echo his words.

“This isn’t a prank or something, right? Revenge for everything I’ve done?”

“I can’t believe you, of all people are asking me this.”

“Fair,” Jeonghan lets out an embarrassed laugh. “It’s just a little hard to believe. That somehow,” he gestures between you both, “this happened. And that it might work out. I know I’ve given you very good reasons to not want anything to do with me for as long as we’ve known each other, so…”

“I’ve done the same, if anything,” you reassure him, a little nervous. “I’m willing to try this out, as long as you are. Y’know, if you want. No pressure.”

“Are you kidding me? Of course I want to,” he says firmly, placing his hand over yours. 

Your next words leave your mouth before you can even think about them. “Can I kiss you?”

Immediately, you clap a hand over your mouth, horrified by exactly how weirdly forward you’re being, but Jeonghan laughs softly, pulling it away and bringing you closer to him. 

“Go right ahead.”

He meets you halfway, slowly, as your lips meet for the first time — you nearly knock your nose against his, and he laughs again as he tilts your chin up and kisses you softly, to begin with. You can taste a hint of pumpkin off his mouth, probably from whatever he’d been drinking when you were still in the Great Hall, and it’s sweet, just like him and the hand that’s brushing your hair out of your face and placing tentative pecks on the corner of your mouth.

You decide that you like it. You like him, you like this, whatever it is that you two choose to be after this night.

It’s what he asks you when you finally pull away, looking anywhere, at anything but him. “So… are we, I mean, should we —”

“Date?”

“Do you want to?” It’s the first time you’ve ever seen Jeonghan look remotely anxious; he’s running his thumb over the hem of his sleeves, fidgeting with his dress robes. “I understand if you don’t. No pressure,” he tries joking.

You snort at this. “Yoon Jeonghan, you are so astronomically dense it hurts to witness sometimes.”

He breaks out into a full smile, eyes bright. “Is that a yes?”

At your affirmation, he brings you to him in a warm, protective hug, allowing you to rest your head on his shoulder. The gentleness of his touch makes you feel comfortable, like you could not take a wrong step while you’re here together. It feels secure, and you lean into him, sharing the happiness he clearly feels when you move closer to him.

You start at the sudden gust of wind, fingers tightening around his shoulders. He pulls back a little to look at you. “It’s getting cold. D’you wanna head back inside?”

“I think we should,” you agree, shivering slightly. “It’s getting late, too.”

Jeonghan flashes you a devilishly handsome smile as he takes your hand, leading you towards the door that’ll take you back into the castle.

“Good,” he says, holding it open for you. “Because I think it’s finally time I show my girlfriend off to the rest of the crowd.”

Platform 9 ¾ is bustling today, students lugging their belongings off the train and hurriedly finding their families, not before making hasty goodbyes to friends as well as promises to write or visit over the summer that awaits. 

“Write me often,” Wonwoo says, giving you and Jun each a hug. “Actually, just text. I’ll be in Korea for most of the summer and I know you both have phones. No need to send an owl for that long of a trip.”

“We will,” you tell him, reaching out to ruffle his hair. (He grumbles, but tolerates it because you’re his friends.) “Have a good time, Woo,” you both call after him as he leaves to find his mother and sister in the group of waiting families.

Someone else taps on your shoulder, two quick ones, and you turn around with a grin. “Yes, Han?”

“Thought you’d forgotten about me,” the boy teases, greeting Jun with a fist bump. “Almost lost you in the crowd there, love.”

The endearment never fails to give you butterflies, even now. Maybe it always will. “You found me, though. I was about to come find you, we were just sending Wonwoo off.”

Jun makes a gagging noise from beside you. “Ew, couples,” he pretends to be disgusted. “I’d leave right now if I wasn’t going home with Y/N.”

“You say that like you weren’t secretly egging me on,” Jeonghan frowns, pulling you into a hug from behind you. “Don’t be a hypocrite.”

You gasp. “Wow, you guys were secretly conniving behind my back?”

“Hey, it wasn’t like that!”

The three of you laugh at this, and Jeonghan lets go of you when you turn around. “I think I see my parents,” you tell him. “We’ve got to go now.”

“I’ll write to you,” he says, fingers intertwined in yours. “And you can come visit whenever you want, both of you. Josh and Seungcheol are usually over most of the time anyways, so it’ll be a whole party.”

“We will,” you promise. “I’ll miss you, Han. But I really do have to go now,” you say sadly.

Jeonghan presses a quick kiss to the side of your head, and then another one to your lips after he makes sure that Jun isn’t looking. “Go home, love. We’ll talk later, okay?”

“Bye,” you whisper, heart thudding in your chest as you leave. It doesn’t stop even when you get to your parents and siblings and they sweep you up in hugs, asking you and Jun how your year has been and your little sisters wondering when they’ll get to go to Hogwarts too, or even as all of you pile into the familiar family car, on the way home.

Jun looks at you when you’re all settled in and your dad gets on the highway. “So,” he says, amusement clear on his face. “That was one hell of a school year, wasn’t it?”

“It was,” you agree, smiling in return as you remember all the ups and downs you’ve been through. “But I really wouldn’t have it any other way.”

thank you for reading! come talk/give feedback/ask questions in my inbox, or rb to show support! sending love, harshi ♡

[shuahearts]

hes the sweetest it hurts

[shuahearts]

POV: you sneak into a concert together ♡ (and get caught)

[shuahearts]

starting a new blog is always such a hassle im going to just 👁 4 now before i reupload my jeonghan fic