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Enby Stories

Hey! This blog is basically for non-binary people to share their stories and what being non-binary means to them and we will try and answer any questions people might have. We just wanna celebrate non-binary people and our diversity. And potentially help any people who are questioning their gender! So feel free to submit your enby story with a picture of yourself that would be wonderful. And also spread this page please!

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cameo by Stan Lee

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It’s been a long time coming, but it’s finally here!

Your patronage is what fuels my personal projects, so please consider supporting my Patreon to help keep my webcomic going!  ♥

Thank you for all of your support, and I hope you enjoy this short film! 

1950′s Lesbians. Reblog to save a life.  

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Gender of The Day: Fallout: New Vegas (2010)

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TomSka is Sad: The Cycle

Illustrated by Sophie ‘Tomee Bear’ Fletcher - @tomee-bear Written and produced by Thomas ‘TomSka’ Ridgewell - @thetomska​ Layout and lettering assistance by Eddie ‘Eddache’ Bowley - @eddache

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I am alive!

Basically, I am alive, and this is not a cry for help. I just want to regroup my thoughts, vent, rant, and maybe by some miracle someone with the info/advice I need can contact me (doubt it but weirder things have happened). Overall I'm pretty ok and much happier than before, like so much happier. (Changed my name (now is Sam), changed my appearence to what I actually like (a hell of a lot more masculine), and came out to my fam and a shitload of people as agender/non-binary). Seriously so much happier even with all the shit. So, for a summary of the rant (I have a draft only talking about 1 point twice as long, so yeah, this is the summary). 1- NAME (or, BUROCRAZY in Spain) What the fuck is it with the goverment and the name change, who am I hurting? Why do you need to be so annoying? And also, SAM IS GENDER NEUTRAL "DEAR" JUDGE WHO SAID IT WAS MASCULINE SO NO CHANGE. Anyhow will try again but it is so annoying, and people for some reason have this need to know my legal name or call me by it when they see it/fund out about it. Do you know how fucking annoying that is! Try getting called Alex (or if that's your name Max) all the time, at the bank, at a hotel, at a shop if you pay by card sometimes. Also, if the person thinks I'm a guy (which happens pretty often) then deal with the, is that your card? Or the weird looks. Once or twice is fine, but is semi-constant and it builds up, like most of the following. 2-BINDING (or, where did them boobs go?) Being constricted in a semi-regular basis is very annoying, the binder is hot, itchy, constricting, causes back pain, etc... (and I am being careful and doing it properly). Yet, I fucking love it, it is so weird the difference between I goddamn hate how I look (no binder) to, I look great today. Mental comfort VS physical comfort. However it is rough when I cannot wear the binder for whichever reason, and I feel like utter shit because it's just not me, pool season is comming and I am terrified. It's like someone forced me into a halloween costume that I have to wear 24/7, NOT ME. 3-MASTECTOMY (or, bye binder, bye boobs, hello flat chest of my dreams) While some people choose to just bind, I cannot wait until the day where I no longer need to, I love what the binder does looks wise but I hate everything else, it is terrible. My problem here is the lack of information, of money, and that agender is not considered a real thing by many people. There are ways to get around the last two, but I need more information in order to plan, which is super hard to get (Seville, south of Spain, willing to move for it, incase anyone does know something). I don't want general information, I want to look for surgeons, know the price and what papers I need, etc... It's not there!!!! I will try again later on with different keywords, etc, but so far I have found nada or super old information. I am afraid of salami nipples, I want more info. 3-LGTBQ+ ORGANIZATIONS (or, the scary place) The whole agender/non-binary thing is not really recognised by many people, and I get the why don't you say you are a transguy thing more often that I like (might end up having to pretend, more later), or the you are just a transguy. It's annoying, finding about agender/non-binary people for me was incredible, it opened a new option I hadn't even considered and gave me someone to relate to, told me that it was ok to be like I am, and gave me the start to act like myself. Back to the topic, while this organisations might be super incredibly helpful, it's not a given that they will accept the whole agender/non-binary thing and that would be a bit crashing (just a bit). Sometimes it is great to have a clear no, yes, or maybe, but for me right now, I'd rather not know, because if the answer it's a no I don't know if I can take. 4-PRONOUNS (or, fucking Spanish, and fucking lax English grammar rules) In English I love they, them, their (which can be used in the third person singular for neutral/non-gendered/unknown gender cases, feel free to look it up), since a lot of people seem to want to fight me on this and I honestly cannot be bothered to deal with the following: coming out, explaining, a lot of the time arguing, then if I'm lucky the person trying to use/getting used to using the pronouns. I just go with whatever they choose and tolerate it (I don't force people if they choose not to for whichever reason, but I do really apreciate and love the people who do, it means a lot). This leads to people using different things (I look androgenous) and then questions which can be good or bad depending on the person asking. I don't mind talking about the whole agender thing, but mainly I just wanna have a beer and chat without having to tell my lifestory/defend myself (it's rarely a short conversation). Another problem, I live in Spain, where the vast majority speak Spanish, where everything is gendered and using the neutral form sticks out like a sore thumb (again, I don't want to bring attention to myself or my gender, just to have a nice chat), so I just say fuck it, use whatever, try to avoid very gendered expresions like man, woman and stuff like that. And if one day I ask for an especific pronoun try to be nice (if I'm paying 10bucks to get into a club I'm gonna be a he in spanish that night). Sounds complicated, is really not that bad, seriously, it just takes a bit of effort and if I ask you to do it, it means you are a good friend in my mind who I care about, or you asked me first. If I barely see you or know you just call me by what feels natural, whatever is fine (yes, even IT if you want to be an asshole). Also, just choosing one pronoun does not solve the problem, because people will use whatever they want to use and I don't want to have to go around correcting those who use the "wrong" ones. (Would say 60% of people choose she, 40% of people choose he) 5-LOOKS (or, I just wanna pee in peace) Like I think I mentioned before (tltr again) I prefer the masculine look, and when I say masculine I mean I dress like a guy, this means that I often get confused as a guy instead of a girl, which is a nice change of pace (people give you more personal space and shake hands instead of kissing your cheek). I honestly prefer to be confused as a guy than a girl, because of the above, and because if you wear "masculine" clothes, act "masculine", and have a "masculine" haircut, you get less shit if people think you are a guy than if people think you are a butch girl (not that I get much shit mind you, people have been sorta cool with it, not perfect but better than it was before). This means that going to the bathroom is tricky, I can pretty much go to both if I want to (the less queue, cleaner one is my choice depending on my hurry), but I can also get told off or insulted no matter which one I use. All I want is to evacuate my biological waste, I don't care where, just let me go. 6- HORMONES/PASSING AS A CIS GUY (or, I just want to be left alone). When you fit with society, even if it's not perfectly, you get a pass by people. You don't get asked about your genitals or other personal questions, people do not feel entitled for this information and don't get mad if you don't answer or get angry at them for asking, you don't have to defend your existance/gender/life to strangers, etc... Mainly, because it doesn't get brought up unless you want to, and while I think one of the best things I can do is educate people so I can help others in my situation and because knowledge is great, I would prefer it if it was in my terms. The fact is you don't really know how people are going to react, and it is exhausting to always have "your guard up". Because my style is already in what society calls the masculine/man box, if I was to take hormones I would easily pass as a cis man, with all the pros this has: less/no discrimination based on "weird looks", more personal space (read above), a beard maybe if I'm lucky (would love one, but unlike the flat chest it is not a need), the chance to bring the whole agender/non-binary thing up when I want to/feel comfortable, t-shirt collars fitting ok, etc... However there are also downsides: possible health problems, costs, most likely having to pretend to be a transman in order to get them, genitalia changes (this is the biggest con for me to be honest, the rest I can deal with, but I like my genitals, I like how everything works and looks and I don't want it to change), etc... I still don't have an answer for this, the fact is that if it wasn't for some of the cons I'll be happy looking more like a clasic cis-man, I like the look (I'd rock the beard if I got one). The problem is that I feel that people, and again, society are pushing me there, and that, I don't like, it would be nice if people stopped commenting like they know everything (most don't sorry) and just let me clear my head and think in peace. It would also help of I had a specialist to talk to as well about it, but again, no can find info online. It's a process people, and I'm very lost because for me this is 24/7. I might just choose one pronoun (with all that that leads to) which is would probably be the masculine because it "fits" my looks better. I might choose to take hormones or not, and the when if so is a mystery. I hope I get the money for the mastectomy soon (1/2 years), when I do I will get the information even if I have to kill someone for it, it would be nice to have it before hand so I can plan better and all that, but I just don't have the energy/strengh right now to go in person to where there MIGHT be information and all that it entails. I have some idea of what the future holds for me, I know what I want for sure and I'm working for it, and I know what I need to think about and really consider and I'm on it as well, and I know what I don't want, which is to go back to pretending to be someone else in order to fit in. Life is confusing, but I could really use just the normal level of confusion without all the above added. All that said, I would not change the past year. I finally feel like myself, and even with all the above I am happier, more confident, and overall just better than before. It's scary, and sometimes shitty, but so so so worth it. If you actually read all that applaud you, feel free to message me if you have any questions, info, or (nice hopefully) comments. PS: Also, it is not a competition but I am aware that my situation is very lucky as most important people have actually accepted me, even if they are struggling with it, and I do have a job and possibilities which other people sadly don't (some contacts that may be able to help a bit if need be)

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Depictions of Lesbianism by Henri Toulouse Lautrec

During his life, Lautrec spent a lot of time in Montmarte, the bohemian centre of 19th century Paris and home to artists, philosophers, writers, performers, and prostitutes. He spent a lot of time with the sex workers there, and discovered that many of them had intimate relationships with one another.

Lautrec’s depiction of lesbianism is particularly notable because it doesn’t fetishise sexual intimacy between women or present it as spectacle for the male gaze. Lautrec was trying to capture small, tender moments in the lives of the women he met, and he did so with humanity and sensitivity. In a world of constructed sexuality and fantasy, he finds the real relationships, and reveals to us the hidden lives of queer women in the 19th century.

Fin-de-siècle Paris was the capital of lesbianism. However, until the mid century, and despite the acknowledgment of male homosexuality, female homosexuality had been considered absurd. This scepticism was grounded in the fact that many nineteenth-century psychologists and medical professionals did not believe in female sexual impulse. Thus, when instances of lesbianism were reported in Alexandre Parent-Duchâtelet’s 1836 study of prostitution in Paris, lesbianism came to be understood as an activity associated with the Montmartre counterculture and, in particular, with prostitution. Indeed, deluxe houses of tolerance often functioned as specialty brothels that catered for a clientele with particular fetishes, such as tableaux vivants where ‘inmates, entirely naked, abandon themselves to homosexual practices on a large black velvet carpet or in rooms hung with black satin to bring out the whiteness of their bodies’. This was lesbianism as commercial spectacle, performed within a closed environment for male consumption.

Lesbianism in the public realm was a sexual preference that, while common, was negatively judged by French conservative society and for this reason was conducted with subtlety and partially obscured. In fact, many of the biggest stars of the Parisian circuses, dance halls and café-concerts were lesbian or bisexual, including Jane Avril and May Milton (whom, it is generally agreed, had a short-lived love affair), Sarah Bernhardt, Cha-u-ka-o and La Goulue. Whilst these Montmartre celebrities were depicted on multiple occasions by Lautrec, the artist chose to represent them as skilled professionals, never exploiting their sexual preference as the main focus of his compositions. So subtle was Lautrec in his treatment of these themes that art historians such as David Sweetman have gone so far as to argue that ‘It comes as something of a shock to realise that most of the women … were in fact lesbians and that quite a few were lovers. So many, in fact, that it is possible to argue that lesbianism is the hidden subtext of much of the art of Henri’s mature years.’

- from nga.gov.au

Images shown:

1. At the Moulin Rouge: The Women Dancing

2. In Bed

3. The Kiss

4. Two Friends

5. Les Deux Amies

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the idea of people having to be ‘useful’ is just so gross, like people do not exist to be used

having to produce something and have a use is a capitalist ideal and not an intrinsic part of humanity

just by being alive you are human and you are worth something and you can never be useless

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Halloween Costume Advice 👻

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Today is a good day

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okay so we’re having a Harry Potter costume party where people are allowed to go as anything but people. Needless to say, I chose Dumbledore’s reflection in the Erised mirror.  And yes, that’s a dementor with a patronus on my leg. You’re welcome.

It’s a dangerous mirror, Harry.

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So the Rocky Horror Picture Show shadow cast that I’m a part of did a Potter Puppet Pals preshow (woah) and I got to be dumbledore. So I couldn’t resist this. I love your comics more than life. >w<

(ඔ⸝⍢⸜ඔ) Aaah this is a beautiful costume! I love the hat, I am sure that you put a lot of work into it! Harry Potter Puppet Pals are so great, I feel honored that you thought of me!! (๑☌▽☌๑) And your facial expression is so  so spot on! Thank you so much, your submission made me happy all day long! I hope that you are having a great day too and that the show went well too! ♥

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