shattered-but-alive

[shattered-but-alive]

This is why you never put people on a pedestal

When they fall

It's you who breaks

[shattered-but-alive]

You built me up just to knock me down

But I will make my own walls

Brick by painful brick

Because anything worth doing

You do yourself

[shattered-but-alive]

Even after all this time

I still think about the future you promised.

There's still this panic when I'm reminded of what happened.

Sometimes I feel like I'm still choking.

I can't have any clothing or accessories around my neck because of it.

I felt the pain in my side for weeks after that night.

I still can't let what happened go, although I've tried so hard and so many times.

Even after everything you said,

I'm still not giving up.

[shattered-but-alive]

Why I do the things I do.

I don't really understand it myself, and I know others certainly don't either.

I'm not sure why I haven't gotten rid of it.

Perhaps I'm not ready.

I'm perplexed by the whole situation, even after all this time.

Strangely enough it feels as if it's been years, as well as only just a few days.

Why...

Why has everyone moved on, except for us?

No one really gets it. No one really understands.

Nor do they want to, not really.

I feel ashamed. Do you?

I don't know what to say or do anymore.

It's pretty clear I don't really have a choice.

We never really did, did we?

Still...

I wish I never would've stopped the car.

Would things be different? Would we be?

I don't know why, but...

I miss you. I wish I never met you. I love you. I can't wait to forgot you.

[shattered-but-alive]

I should have listened.

I'm sorry I didn't.

I know you told me since the beginning.

You were right,

What else can I say?

Do you want an apology?

Will that make you feel better?

I'm sorry I didn't listen.

I'm sorry I ignored your warnings.

I'm sorry that I was hurt,

For not listening to you.

Go on and say it.

I know you want to.

Go on and say it again.

You were right.

You were right about him,

And you're right about me.

I know I should have listened.

You don't see red flags when you're desperate.

You don't notice the warnings when blind sided.

I didn't know what was happening,

Because I didn't want to.

You don't have to reminded me it's my fault.

I already do that on my own.