sentientcitysmackdown

[sentientcitysmackdown]

Not quite sentient, but I'd have loved to see here the sister cities of Besźel and Ul Qoma from the book "The City & The City" by China Miéville

uhh i have some good news and some bad news!

the good news is that besźel and ui qoma did indeed make it in! they were in here! the bad news is that they got knocked out (pretty decisively) in round 2 by ankh-morpork. but your support for them is still appreciated, however belated!

[sentientcitysmackdown]

Round 1, Poll 10: Wayside School vs Gunnerkrigg Court

[sentientcitysmackdown]

hi. you have a big brain and a big heart, to have made the only poll that matters

oh!!!! very very belated, but--- thank you so much for this ask!!!! it's so sweet :,) i metaphorically kept it like in a little heart locket to look at whenever i got discouraged about the competition and it really helped!

[sentientcitysmackdown]

Hey!! I know the Smackdown is over now, but these articles are still up if you missed a round or 2 or want a recap. Plus, also, just fyi, I got interviewed. Yeah. Pretty cool, right? Not to brag, but I'm kind of a big deal. ☺️

The final 2 are very close to being determined!!!! If you're looking to look back at the course of the Sentient City Smackdown so far, I truly cannot recommend Denis Urban's covering of it enough. I only found out today, but somebody's been doing articles about this like a proper sports battle!!!! Guys!!!! This is so awesome!!! The articles are hilarious and also like, a really good analysis of fandom size and how the polls might shake out. There's some fun number stuff in there I didn't even know about!! Go check it out, it's great.

[sentientcitysmackdown]

You can get your commemorative Ankh-Morpork Victory t-shirts from that weird guy over there before you leave! Not brought to you by SCS. We didn't make those. Not sure who that guy selling them is, or how he made them so fast.

[sentientcitysmackdown]

Well folks, Night Vale put up a good fight, but in the end I think this match was fairly settled from the beginning. Ankh-Morpork! A city no one speaks ill of, at least not within earshot of its citizens. The streets are so clean you can sometimes even see them! And the crime is exceptionally well-organized! Yes, there's simply no beating the Big Wahoonie. After all, in (not to brag) my own words, Ankh-Morpork is "all the worst parts of every city you've ever visited", and that means it's your city. It's whatever city you love and hate the most. That's what makes it so awfully fantastic. And that's what makes it the winner of the first official SENTIENT CITY SMACKDOWN! The city is a woman, indeed.

Thank you so much again to everyone who voted, propagandized, and cheered for your respective cities. Ultimately, determining a winner was never the true goal here--mostly, I hope that you all found some new recommendations for your reading/watching lists through this poll! I know I did! Spend some time living in one of these cities. It probably won't kill you.

And finally, let us all join in a rousing round of Ankh-Morpork's official song, We Can Rule You Wholesale!

FINALS

[ID: A map of Ankh-Morpork and the cover of the Welcome to Night Vale novel, edited to be blockily merging into each other. End ID.]

Well folks, it's been a wild and glorious ride through these brackets. Night Vale won by one vote! One vote! I'd like to once again thank everyone who's submitted, voted, reblogged, cheered, and yes, even sent in propaganda asks that I maybe took a little too personally over the course of this bracket. This has genuinely been one of the most fun things I've done ov--

What? It's not over?

OH. Of course! Cities and gentletowns, without further ado, the final matchup of (this year's?) SENTIENT CITY SMACKDOWN!

[sentientcitysmackdown]

6 HOURS LEFT!

FINALS

[ID: A map of Ankh-Morpork and the cover of the Welcome to Night Vale novel, edited to be blockily merging into each other. End ID.]

Well folks, it's been a wild and glorious ride through these brackets. Night Vale won by one vote! One vote! I'd like to once again thank everyone who's submitted, voted, reblogged, cheered, and yes, even sent in propaganda asks that I maybe took a little too personally over the course of this bracket. This has genuinely been one of the most fun things I've done ov--

What? It's not over?

OH. Of course! Cities and gentletowns, without further ado, the final matchup of (this year's?) SENTIENT CITY SMACKDOWN!

[sentientcitysmackdown]

so i JUST found out that a morpork is a real animal and not just a weird word.....this is SO embarrassing nobody tell ankh-morpork okay

[sentientcitysmackdown]

you guys literally are all so brave. even through the screen i can tell. keep going

[sentientcitysmackdown]

oh hey both the cities in the finals are technically 2 cities combined. love is real

[sentientcitysmackdown]

alright guys real talk is anyone planning on drawing fanart for this competition or should i take matters into my own hands

[sentientcitysmackdown]

his skyscrapers are soaked in emotion

[sentientcitysmackdown]

FINALS

[ID: A map of Ankh-Morpork and the cover of the Welcome to Night Vale novel, edited to be blockily merging into each other. End ID.]

Well folks, it's been a wild and glorious ride through these brackets. Night Vale won by one vote! One vote! I'd like to once again thank everyone who's submitted, voted, reblogged, cheered, and yes, even sent in propaganda asks that I maybe took a little too personally over the course of this bracket. This has genuinely been one of the most fun things I've done ov--

What? It's not over?

OH. Of course! Cities and gentletowns, without further ado, the final matchup of (this year's?) SENTIENT CITY SMACKDOWN!

[sentientcitysmackdown]

Less dramatic then the Revachol-Night Vale battle, but still pretty intense....the Big Wahoonie takes the day!

ROUND 4, MATCHUP 2

[ID: The map of Fallen London, the letters VS., and the map of Ankh-Morpork. End ID.]

The second round of the semifinals!! Again, these are both fantastic cities, if mildly horrific. Fallen London is from the online browser game Fallen London: many feet underground, permanently in the year 1899, and very much not the London it once was before the Bazaar claimed it. The streets shift, the people are...not all entirely people anymore, and I don't think it's actually supposed to be called London anymore but people call it that anyway. Ankh-Morpork is the principal city of Discworld and the setting of many a Discworld book: on the meta-level, it's a mishmash of several different real world cities at their worst and also best. As exhaustively proven by a popular tumblr post of mine where people in the tags have compared it to every city from Seattle to Rome, it's Your city. It's whatever city you love and hate the most. That's what makes it so awfully fantastic.

I've talked a lot! Here's quotes from those who submitted these two:

"[Ankh-Morpork] is a horrible palimpsest of human experience in all its variation & inglory. It's awful and smells bad but it is a character and it bends the Narrative and is the site of many many fucked up stories"

"London, stolen by bats in 1862, now rests on the back of an enormous creature known as the Bazaar. Despite being underground, the city thrives, and roads never seem to lead where they're supposed to. 1 vote for the Fifth City = 1 year off the Traitor Empress' reign"

(remember, as always: build your cities up, don’t tear other people’s down! this is the semifinals: both of these cities undoubtedly deserve to be here, and are very loved by many people.)

[sentientcitysmackdown]

YEAH WHAT THIS GUY SAID. HOLY SHIT

ROUND 4, MATCHUP 1

[ID: An image of Revachol from Disco Elysium, the letters VS., and the podcast cover for Welcome To Night Vale. End ID.]

Truly, what is there left to say about these two fine specimens of cityhood? They've battled it out through countless (well, 3) rounds. Revachol is the setting of Disco Elysium, the game that's recently captured much of Tumblr's heart, and Night Vale is (of course) the setting of Welcome to Night Vale, a podcast that's had it's own place on Tumblr since the ancient days of Dashcon.

I've said a lot over the course of this competition, so I'll let some of those who submitted these cities speak:

"[Revachol] speaks through the wind and footprints in the mud and broken glass and through all the people living in it. It's alive in all the ways that matter."

"the city of night vale lives and grows over the years along with us, hiding its existence from the world and warping every part of itself into surrealism. night vale loves you and changes you"

(remember, as always: build your cities up, don't tear other people's down! this is the semifinals: both of these cities undoubtedly deserve to be here, and are very loved by many people.)

[sentientcitysmackdown]

The final 2 are very close to being determined!!!! If you're looking to look back at the course of the Sentient City Smackdown so far, I truly cannot recommend Denis Urban's covering of it enough. I only found out today, but somebody's been doing articles about this like a proper sports battle!!!! Guys!!!! This is so awesome!!! The articles are hilarious and also like, a really good analysis of fandom size and how the polls might shake out. There's some fun number stuff in there I didn't even know about!! Go check it out, it's great.

[sentientcitysmackdown]

This is the lesson: Great cities are like any other living things, being born and maturing and wearying and dying in their turn.