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selfmadeeasy-blog · 5 years

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New Post has been published on http://www.selfmadeeasy.com/rediscovering-ourselves-when-depression-gobbles-us-up-the-blurt-foundation/

Rediscovering Ourselves when Depression Gobbles Us Up - The Blurt Foundation

When we have depression – particularly when we’ve had it for a long time – it can feel as though our illness completely gobbles us up.

Depression strips the joy out of all the activities we used to love, steals our ability to think clearly, and can make seeing our friends feel impossible. We might not be able to remember the films that we like, or which kind of music we prefer. We might struggle to leave the house and forget the places we used to visit with our families. We may no longer be able to taste our favourite foods properly and lose track of whether we prefer chocolate or cheese. Depression can zap our creativity and dry up our inspiration.

We might start grieving the person we used to be. We might miss ‘old us’ and yearn for a past version of ourselves.

It can reach the point when it feels like depression has stolen everything that makes us, ‘us’, and rather than seeing ourselves as a person with likes, dislikes, loves, talents and amazing qualities, we see ourselves as a ‘depressed person’.

We aren’t just ‘depressed people’, though. We are family members, friends, and part of society. Under our depression, we have distinct and unique personalities – our illness doesn’t and shouldn’t define who we are.

Reconnecting with our true selves isn’t always easy. It can take a long time and a lot of hard work, especially as depression often robs us of the energy or motivation to take action. But it is possible.

Talking therapies can be very helpful, but there are also things we can do ourselves to help rediscover who we are. Here are a few ideas:

Make peace with your grief

It’s hard to make peace with our lives when we’re beating ourselves up for losing touch with the person we once were, or grieving the time we’ve lost to our depression. It’s natural for us to be angry at our illness, and to cry and grieve the loss of our old selves. However if we want to move forwards it’s important to accept that depression has changed things, and change our focus from who we used to be, to who we want to be.

A great way to reignite our sense of self is to allow ourselves to dream. Always wanted to be an airline pilot? Google the steps involved in getting there. Always wanted a cat? Print a picture, stick it on your fridge, and figure out how you can make it happen. It doesn’t matter if your dreams feel impossible right now, it doesn’t matter how big or small your dreams are, or if they change as you’re chasing them, as the Disney corporation say: ‘If you can dream it you can do it’.

Create a ‘you’ book

Write, draw, stick things, paint, make a mess. Cut up magazines, save newspaper articles, print bits and bobs off the internet – begin to pull together an idea of what matters to you. Save anything that you can relate to, even if you’re not really sure why they jump out at you. It could be a physical scrapbook, or perhaps a Pinterest board. Slowly you will begin to build up a picture of who you are.

Look up local groups

Lot of places have local interest groups. In many areas there are craft groups, local history groups, Scouts and Guides, sports clubs and other social groups. Meetup.com can be a good place to find out about things going on in your area, you could also go down to the library, check the display boards in supermarkets, or find local groups on Facebook. Pop along to one or two and see if you enjoy what they have to offer. It can be scary at first, but you could always rope in a friend to go with you. If you go once and you don’t like it, there’s no pressure to go again, but you might find a new hobby or meet some new friends.

The important people will stick around

When we have spent a long time squishing ourselves into the person we think that other people want us to be, it can feel scary to change. But living for other people will never make us truly happy. And we find that – despite our fears – those who really matter stick around, no matter what changes we make.

Ditch Perfection

Nobody is perfect. You’re unlikely to crochet a perfect blanket the first time you ever pick up a crochet hook, or drive the perfect lap the first time you ever get in a racing car. When we have depression there is a niggling voice in our head, constantly filling us with self-doubt and telling us we’re not good enough. We need to tell that voice to hush. We’re not perfect, and that’s perfectly OK: if we enjoy something, the results really don’t matter. Focus on the journey, not the destination.

Be Patient

Finally, be patient with yourself. Depression knocks the wind out of us at the best of times. Don’t expect yourself to immediately step into a whole new life with enormous zeal, when you’re struggle to find the energy to get dressed. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Take things slowly and be kind to yourself.

Sharing is caring: please share this post to help others, you never know who might need it.

This content was originally published here.

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selfmadeeasy-blog · 5 years

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New Post has been published on http://www.selfmadeeasy.com/people-who-drink-a-glass-of-wine-a-day-have-a-lower-risk-of-depression/

People who drink a glass of wine a day have a lower risk of depression

IF you’re a lover of wine, it’s time to celebrate – as a new study has revealed that people who drink a glass a day had a lower risk of depression than those who are tee-total.

Researchers in Sweden looked at the lifestyle habits of 5,000 people over a 12 year period to see how alcohol affected their mental health.

Researchers in Sweden found that alcohol can be good for your mental well being

Getty – Contributor

And they found that those who were happiest drank up to 14 units of alcohol a week – or the equivalent of 10 pints of beer and a little less than 10 glasses of wine.

Those who chose not to drink ended up with a 70-percent higher risk of depression, but binge drinkers who took it over the ideal limit were worst off, at 80 percent more likely to suffer.

Published in the Acta Phsychiatrica of Scandinavia, part of a group of scientific journals, overall alcohol was tied to good mental health.

While excessive drinking is proven to be risky, sticking to the ‘sweet spot’ of 14 units can end up being more beneficial than you might think.

Sticking to the ‘sweet spot’ of 14 units a week can benefit mental health

Getty – Contributor

If you don’t believe it – in all but one of the world’s Blue Zones, where life expectancy is the longest, the majority of people have at least one drink a day.

Risks can be higher for younger women who could develop heart disease or cancer from alcohol abuse, but other studies have shown risks have been overestimated in some cases.

In fact, while older women were thought to be in danger by drinking, it was found that alcohol was protective for those past the retirement age.

Psychologist Sir Cary Lynn Cooper said on the matter: “Drinking helps people unburden themselves. The tricky bit is just knowing how much or too much is bad for mental health.”

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selfmadeeasy-blog · 5 years

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New Post has been published on http://www.selfmadeeasy.com/to-all-those-who-support-us-with-depression-thank-you/

To All Those Who Support Us With Depression, Thank You

This is to those of you who support us with depression. Our parents, friends, GPs, nurses, mental health workers, siblings, partners, colleagues, and flatmates. We want to say thank you; for being there, for trying to understand, for not giving up on us.

Thank you

For continuing to try and communicate with us. We know it’s not easy. We know that it’s hard when we struggle to talk. We know it can be difficult when you ask us a question and it takes us twenty minutes to answer. We know it’s hard when you ask us what’s wrong and we can’t tell you. We’re grateful that you continue to ask us if we’re okay.

For texting, calling, and messaging us. We know it’s frustrating when it takes us days or weeks to reply to messages. We know it makes it hard to arrange things. We know it might make you worry. Thank you for not giving up on us and for carrying on contacting us even when we don’t reply.

For trying to understand us. We know it can be hard for you to understand, especially when we struggle to explain. We know that ‘I don’t know’ is one of the most frustrating answers to the question ‘what’s wrong?’. We know that you want to understand and you want to help. We really appreciate that you continue to try, listen to us, to be there.

For listening to us, even when we make no sense. We know it can be hard to have a conversation with us. We know it can be hard to hear how much we’re struggling. We know how tricky it can be to have a one-sided discussion. Thank you for talking to us – for telling us about your day and helping us to maintain a sense of normality. Thank you for the meaningless conversations, the meaningful conversations, and the conversations that we have without words.

For picking up the slack when we are unable to manage everything that we need to do. We realise that watching us struggle to complete basic tasks despite having no physical afflictions stopping us can be difficult. Thank you for doing extra duties at work, for helping us make sure that all our jobs get done even when we are unable to do them all ourselves, for helping us to clean our flats and houses, for cooking for us when we’re struggling to eat properly. Thank you for going out of your way to do extra jobs. We really appreciate it.

For respecting when we need space and time, and recognising when we need you to break down our walls. We know how hard it must be to watch us feel unable to look after ourselves. Thank you for helping us to practice self-care, for helping us to do things we struggle to do – for encouraging us to eat, for accompanying us outside, for helping us to get dressed, and for all the other little things you help us to do. Thank you for celebrating our little wins with us and for your gentle encouragement.

For not giving up on us, despite how long we’ve been ill. You didn’t sign up for this. We know you wish there was a ‘quick fix’, or something you could do. We do, too. Thank you for standing alongside us and for being so patient.

For validating us, for recognising our struggles, for not just assuming everything is okay, but for taking the time to listen, and for really hearing our response. Thank you for supporting us.

For letting us cry, for letting us be sad, angry, and upset when we need to be and for all your hugs. Thank you for putting up with us when we snap, for holding us when we feel like we’re falling apart, for sitting with us when we struggle to be alone.

Thank you for everything you have done, and continue to do, to support us. It’s not gone unnoticed. We really do appreciate it.

Thank you.

Sharing is caring: please share this post to help others, you never know who might need it.

This content was originally published here.

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selfmadeeasy-blog · 5 years

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New Post has been published on http://www.selfmadeeasy.com/having-a-pint-or-two-a-day-reduces-risk-of-depression/

Having a pint or two a day reduces risk of depression

A PINT or two a day slashes the risk of depression, a study reveals.

Moderate boozers enjoying up to 14 drinks a week faced a five per cent risk of the blues.

A study revealed having a pint or two reduces the risk of depression

Teetotallers were 70 per cent more likely to struggle with low mood. And heavy boozers saw their risk raised by 80 per cent.

Dr Katalin Gemes, from the Karolinska Institute in Sweden, backed politician Nigel Farage’s regular pub visits, saying: “Taking part in social gatherings may explain why the risk of depression was lower.”

The study ranked moderate drinking as up to 14 units of alcohol a week.

As Swedish units have more alcohol than UK ones this is the rough equivalent of 21 units or ten pints.

Going to the pub helps people unburden themselves. The tricky bit is knowing how much — too much is bad for mental and physical health

Sir Cary Lynn Cooper, Professor of Organizational Psychology and Health at Manchester University

The Chief Medical Officer’s guideline is to drink no more than 14 units a week.

But experts believe moderate boozing alters feelgood chemicals such as serotonin.

Booze may also boost healthy bacteria in the gut — reducing inflammation that can trigger depression.

The study followed 5,000 adults over a decade and took into account previous depression, drinking history, income and age.

Psychologist Sir Cary Lynn Cooper agreed with the findings published in journal Acta Psychiatrica Scandinavica.