salfur

[salfur]

thinking about the time my local garden centre put signs up that said "propagation piracy is a crime" and explained that "propagation piracy" is when you pick up a leaf or a twig that's fallen on the floor and take it home and grow a plant from it. I came home and mocked this because it's obviously extremely pathetic and stupid, and my ex got salty and said they were right and I was just like. you literally call yourself a communist and you are defending the right of corporations to protect their hypothetical future profits by classifying it as a crime to pick up a leaf

[salfur]

Found that over at mastodon

[salfur]

[salfur]

I was high off my ass last night and had this dream where I was in this dense ass forest and sitting there was a tall woman. She was so tall I couldn’t see her face but she was wearing gold and I was like “uh…hi?” And she said “I made you, do you know that?” And I nodded and she was like “I hear your thoughts. Why do you hate my creation? Why do you try to destroy yourself? I made you perfect as you are. Please don’t break my heart”. Then she started crying and it flooded and I woke up with fucking heart palpitations like what does it Mean™️????

[salfur]

Apparently back in the day lighthouse keepers HAD to have a wife to get the job so they wouldn’t be too lonely and go insane. So what I’m saying is

Fake dating au where they pretend to be married so one of them can get a job as a lighthouse keeper.

[salfur]

I think it was before I started posting story concepts on tumblr but I had an old concept called ‘apocalyptia’ which was a dark comedy about a world where every apocalypse movie premise happened simultaneously

[salfur]

[salfur]

Parks patron: hey what are you gonna do about that graffiti?

Me: it's on the side of a business building, so the business owner has to take initiative

Patron: but it's visible from the trails!

Me: it is not on our property, so it falls on the owner of the business.

Patron: don't you have a graffiti task force?

Me: no, sir.

Patron: when I lived in Georgia we had a graffiti task force that would take care of that.

Me: we do not have that here.

Patron: you'd think the parks and rec people would take care of graffiti in their parks.

Me: we do. This is not on a park. It is on a business.

[salfur]

do you ever wonder if your choice of blorbo is random baby chick imprinting, or in fact a deep physiological profile that reveals all the things you need therapy for

[salfur]

Archives Universe Georgie and Colin Becher have matching t-shirts that say “The answer is a hammer I don’t care what the question is”

[salfur]

no no no

[salfur]

Reblog if you write fan fiction

Doesn’t matter if you write in a frequent basis, or once in a blue moon, just how many of us are there?

[salfur]

Finally some good fucking news

[salfur]

[salfur]

[salfur]

Day 6, little fae faun