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DREAMS DO COME TRUE

i deserve to be a little puppy girl i deserve little kisses on the forehead while he calls me puppy i deserve to have a lil bed under his desk so i can be at his feet while he plays his little games and suck him off while he tries to focus, i would look so cute on a leash with a cute little collar and getting to look up to him all doe eyed and innocent when i go down on him and seeing him hold my leash i should’ve had a tail so i could uncontrollably wag it when ever i get to see him bc i’m so happy he’s there blehhh

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and what if i said im puppy? what if i told you we fuckin did it reddit i’m his good puppy and i get a little bed under his desk ohhh my goddd

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i need to suck his dick sooooo bad i’m not even joking he got a haircut and i need him so bad he was so sweet last night playing with my boobs while he fingered me until we switched off and i got to finish but i wanna go down on him bc i didn’t get to

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Not to be a slut but what if you bit my neck while you came inside of me?

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i’m fucking the shit out the winter king

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the fact he likes it when i’m a brat got me feeling so heavily like he wants me to be a little mean and a little bratty so he can fuck me til i can barely talk and then ask me “what was that?” “are you gonna keep being mean to me?” “what’d you say?” so i can try and keep going or start begging him to fuck me is just so so good and he tried to coax me into being mean again fuck fuck fuck

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Free use stress relief fucktoy gf 🤝 Hypersexual stressed out bf with no other outlet

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i deserve to be a little puppy girl i deserve little kisses on the forehead while he calls me puppy i deserve to have a lil bed under his desk so i can be at his feet while he plays his little games and suck him off while he tries to focus, i would look so cute on a leash with a cute little collar and getting to look up to him all doe eyed and innocent when i go down on him and seeing him hold my leash i should’ve had a tail so i could uncontrollably wag it when ever i get to see him bc i’m so happy he’s there blehhh

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hehehe lalala him fucking my throat was so nice, wish he’d do it more often but we just started doing it so there’s timeeeee hehe him pulling my hair and holding it tight while he moves my head up and down on his cock and then pulling me off to slap me and to hold me there so he can see my face. watching him squirm n whimper when i lick from the base to the tip hehe :3

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i love asking "is this ok?" when i know full well he likes what i'm doing to him so all he can say is a breathy, open mouthed "uh huh" in response

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Okay so I don’t know why but I’m just so fixated this idea? I can imagine a female reader, being the first and only girl in the jackass crew and also being apart of wildboyz. Her, Chris, & Steve-O are all attached at the hips obviously and maybe one day after filming for Wildboyz they all go back to the hotel and clean up, have a big smoke sess and it just leads to these two tag teaming her while there all high as hell? (Which btw I feel like it’s very much a common occurrence 🤭 especially if they’re in like a poly relationship)

STEVEO/READER/CHRIS PONTIUS IMAGINE

im literally so obsessed with this idea, know that chris and steve-o were so close anyways it always makes me giggle. sorry i didnt get to do this sooner i have had a kidney stone and have been super sick bc of it, welp enjoy!! this is also my first ever like actual written out smut so sorry if its absolute shit but i have the writing skills of a idiot so….

WARNINGS: cursing, drinking, talks of drugs and alcohol, and smut

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ok so u, steve-o and chris have always been pretty close

yall all met through the first season of jackass

u were good friends with steph so she invited u to go watch her and the guys do stupid shit

and ofc u wanted to participate

so u go onto set looking around for her

instead u see two half naked men just chillin, standing around

after some first awkward glances u meet with steph and watch everything unfold

everyone was in the middle of a type of field with a huge loop that ppl were trying to ride with skate boards and bikes and shit

it was actually super cool

after a few hours of filming in the hot sun u pretty much were beat

u walk over to ur friend to tell her u think ur gonna head out for today

but little do u know the two guys from earlier are also friends with steph

so the four of yall get to talking

and u learn that the one man whos tan, in pretty good shape and is now wearing bunny ears and a flower bra is chris pontius, and the other bald man wearing a cheetah speedo is steve-o

they both invited u to join them to get ihop after the shoot

and just like that a trio was born

the three of u were always together

either just chillin, partying, or filming

u guys were never apart

u were the only one out of the three who actually had an apartment

so the two mostly (basically) lived at ur house

after the seasons of jackass ended steve-o and chris ended up doing a spin off called “wildboyz”

obviously u were still gonna be with them

u do hella cameos in wildboyz

u do all the shit that the guys are too pussy to do

swimming with alligators, sharks, bears rlly anything

also when steveo didnt wanna jump off the bridge with wings on, u def did

so lets set the scene

after doing some filming in australia, the crew and u three decide to go out on the town in melborne

just doing some bar hopping

eventually the crew gets tired and drunk and go off back to the hotel room

not the three american idiots tho

u steveo and pontius are just having a grand ol’ time drinking, goofing around and just having fun

it seems awesome

until pontius ends up fist fighting with some random guys which leads to steveo also getting involved

that gets everyone kicked out the bar

after some mumbling and complaining from the two u bring up a solution

“hey lets just go back to my room, i brought some weed we could go smoke or something..”

it was a absolute yes

who says no to weed?

the three of u go back to ur hotel room and smoke 2 whole joints together

yall were HIGHHHHH

the three of u guys were just in a cluster on the cheap ass hotel rug, giggling and cracking jokes till way into the night

the thing is, when ur high, u tend to get a little touchy

so little touches on chris’ chest while laughing here and accidently touching steveos thigh there

totally innocent touches

things start to get a little intense tho

longer eye contact from chris, steve-o trying to make u laugh more

and just like that steve-o has u in a bear hug, ur back to his chest while chris is next to u guys

after u calm urself down from having a giggle attack

u look over at chris

“have i ever told u, u have a pretty face y/n” chris says

u kinda had to stop in ur tracks a bit, only bc ur surprised

“yea, ur right chris, i also never say how good u smell dude, its like heavenly” steveo chimes in

u start to get a little nervous

yea u thought ur two friends were super hot but u werent gonna tell THEM that

“yea its probably because i actually shower, unlike u two” u giggle trying to ease the tension

“im serious y/n, ur actually gorgeous, ive just never told u like out loud in person before” chris says

ur face starts to turn bright red

“guys wha-“

“aweee chris ur making them blush” steve-o chuckles

at this point ur beat red, and a little sweaty

ur just baffled bc u know all abt the type of ppl chris and steve-o go for, you the last person u would ever think they would even come close to saying that stuff too

“hey, lets put a proposal on the table” steveo says, snaking his hand around ur waist

“its been a hell of a night, why dont we end this shit off right, chris? y/n? u down?”

“LIKE SEX?” u blurt out in ur intoxicated state causing the two guys to burst out laughing

“yes y/n, like sex” chris says

welp who knew this was gonna happen

ur two best friends wanting to fuck u??? like what?? how did this happen

i mean u were already in steveos lap, having his hand wrap around ur waist as his head rests on ur shoulder and chris on the opposite side of u playing with ur hair, curling it in between his fingers

“fuck it” u say, turning to chris

chris leans in and starts kissing u

eh well not kissing

more like very drunkly making out

steve-o starts kissing and licking on ur neck

all this is making ur face bright red

and tbh making u hella turned on

u eventually crawl out of steveos lap straddling chris

he runs his hand up ur shirt and up the small of ur back, steveo then helps chris take off ur shirt and ur bra

steveo then starts massaging ur breasts while whispering sweet nothings into ur ear

u pull away from the two

“guys i really think we shouldnt do this on the gross ass hotel room floor, the room comes with a bed for a reason” you say

the two look at eachother then look at u and nod

chris throws u over his shoulder while steveo runs ahead and plops down on the bed

chris then puts u on the bed, leaving u in ur jean shorts from ur guys night on the town

chris then unzips ur shorts and looks up at ur for permission

u nod and he starts kissing down ur stomach, taking off ur jeans and panties as he does

chris starts to eat u out while u push ur back into steve-o

u go to tangle ur fingers into chris’ hair

steveo quickly takes ur wrists into one hand

“awee come one sweetheart ur giving him all the attention” he chuckles

u turn to him, not even able to make out a word bc of how good chris is doing

who knew that he could eat pussy like THAT

u lock lips with steveo and u both moan into the the kiss

chris pulls away from u

he gets up and crawls onto the bed with u and steveo

damn good thing u got a king bed with ur room

u turn to straddle steveo, grinding against him as u do causing u both to groan

u pull away helping steve-o get his pants off

u look over at chris and hes already intensely watching u too, dick in hand

bc thats just how he rolls

u take steve-os cock out of his boxers, lick up his shaft then get on top of him

u put his tip at ur entrance and slowly sink down onto him

u both moan at the feeling

as u start to ride him, u turn to chris once again and hes slowly stroking his dick, once u really get a look at it u realize how big he is

“hm what? u like what u see sweetheart?” chris mumbles in between moans

u nod, still riding steveo, feeling urself slowly creep towards release

steveo then pulls u off him

“i feel like this isnt fair, i shouldnt have to keep ur gorgeous body all to myself, thats just selfish.” he beckons chris over

“turn around” steve-o says

u do as he says, chris now on the bed in front of you

“whats wrong darling? u look like u want something, dont be shy” chris says caressing ur cheek to make u look him in his eyes

god u couldnt get enough of his big beautiful eyes

“yes..” u say lowly

“what was that? i cant hear u?”

“yes chris, please.” u say glancing down at his dick

while this is all happening steve-o is just groping ur ass

“ohh u wanna suck me off dont u?” he rubs his thumb across ur bottom lip “ofc u can, anything for u”

u lean down to his dick, putting it in ur hand and giving it small licks here and there

as ur ass is up in the air, right in front of steveos face, he pushes himself back into u, fucking u from behind

u start to take all of chris into ur mouth, moaning as u feel steveos hand reach for ur clit

the room was just filled with moans, groans, and the sound of skin slapping, steve-o and chris just making intense eye contact the whole time

“ah fuck y/n just like that” chris mumbles as u take his whole length down ur throat, gagging

steveos thrusts start to speed up quicker and u feel like ur going to cum and minute now

u pull off chris’ dick with a pop, jerking him off in place of ur mouth

“shit, im-“

u dont get to finish ur sentence before u feel urself cum all over steveos cock

steveos fucks u through ur high, pulls out and cums on ur back

then a few minutes later chris came onto ur face

after the three of u have calmed down from ur highs, chris gets up and grabs a towel from the bathroom to clean u guys up

well mainly u

after u three all get into bed and fall asleep, u cuddling into chris’ chest and steveo spooning u from behind

“man we should do that more often” steveo says

and u guys sure did

after that night u three all kinda agreed to be a thing, u recommend a poly relationship which they didnt know much about but were completely down for

they both are in love with u (and lowkey eachother) so it was a win for everyone involved

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ok hope yall enjoyed! as u can tell i cant take smut srsly at all ive never rlly written smut before at this detail level so i just kinda went with it, hope its not too bad. im also way to lazy atm to read over this for mistakes so ima just got with it, please keep recommending stuff for me to write! its very fun!

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BF FUCKED THE SHIT OUTTA ME HE WAS POUNDING ME EXACTLY THE WAY I NEEDED IM A MESS AT WORK RN

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SOME OF US WANTED LUIGI BEFORE THE MARIO MOVIE WAS EVEN ESTABLISHED IVE BEEN ON THIS TRAIN BEFORE ANYONE BOUGHT THEIR FUCKING TICKETS

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not to be horny on main but pontius is the loml and i would greatly appreciate something smutty with him🤭 pretty please with a cherry on top🙏🙏

geez sex with this man would be so damn good.

nsfw! fem!reader, oral (f receiving)

he’s the kind of guy who just loves pleasuring you, he thinks sex is based off if his partner is pleased during it. which you most certainly are.

half the time foreplay with him can go on for what seems like hours until you can’t move. sometimes he doesn’t mean to have it go on for as long as it does… he just gets so fuzzy headed listening to you babble about how it just feels so good as you grind your hips on his tongue.

he would hold your hips down and keep lapping his tongue against your cilt even after you had your third orgasm on his tongue. your heels digging into his back as you whine loudly. but your actions certainly aren’t making chris was to stop anytime soon.

i think he would have a blush spread across his face the whole time, he is just so flustered by how good you look and sound, all for him.

good thing he is known as being the penis guy from jackass because he definitely lives up to the title.

he loves fucking you in doggy style. i dont care what anyone else says he loves it.

he loves watching you claw at the sheets of the bed as he pounds his hips into you, lewd noises filling the room and you can only moan from the pleasure shooting up your spine.

i feel like chris isn’t very vocal during sex, but you’ll definitely hear some hard breathing and groans. also don’t take his quietness for displeasure because he truly feels amazing.

the once in a blue moon times he will talk during sex is letting you know how good you look while he fucks you.

“Yo-You look so hot- fuck.”

“You’re so beautiful.”

“God you make me feel- shit- amazing.”

this might be a bit much but he loves finishing on your ass, also the main reason he likes doggy style so much.

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could you do hcs with dave and how you wrangle darf and how he treats you vs everyone else when darf is about? i’m a sucker for the “he’s an asshole to everyone but you” trope <3

i love this ask!! thank you anon

i got a bit carried away LOL

how you deal w darf

we know how much of a nightmare darf is when he makes his appearances

dave doesn’t believe anyone when they tell him that he’s ‘uncontrollable’ and ‘an asshole’ when he’s drunk

so at this point it’s better just to deal with darf when he arrives

but the guys have come to realise that when you’re around

darf can finally be controlled

they don’t say anything when they first realise it, not wanting to ruin the break they’re getting from ‘the annoyance’

they watch as you put your arms out for a hug and dave immediately just melts

major heart eyes coming from him

he’s straight in your arms and you’re stroking his hair

and finally, he’s calm

you catch the boys staring at you with shocked expressions, and you just giggle

this causes darf to speak up, getting ready to have a tantrum that the attention is no longer on him

“whatcha laughing at y/nnnnn” “nothing dave, just chill”

and he immediately chills out

from this point on, get ready to be hassled by all the boys to come and stop dave from being so annoying when drunk

doesn’t matter if you’re at the bar or party with them, or if you’re at home and it’s 3am

you’re getting put in charge of dave for the rest of the night

sometimes you put your foot down when you’re out with the guys and explain that you’re here to have fun, not babysit

and the boys will whine and complain (especially bam) but they won’t force you to look after him

this leads to you almost pissing yourself at how they all try to deal with darf

and darf is not having it

they’re trying to spoil his fun?

time to try and vomit on them, and then time to jump from table to table, and then time to lay on the floor and not move so everyone has to step over him

so eventually you know that you’re gonna have to help out

especially when steveos getting so frustrated he looks like he’s gonna punch dave

so you crouch down to where he’s laid on the floor and once he gets one look at you, his eyes light up

“Y/N!!! guyysss y/ns herreeee”

they all just shake their heads and wonder if you’ve got some superpower that makes darf be tolerable around you

“come on dave, time to get up, we can go sit at the table over there”

then before you can even stand up properly, he’s up and already on his way to the table

and if for some reason you leave the table through the night, he becomes a menace again

he’ll get up on the table and start dancing, spilling his drink all over himself and on others

causing johnny and ehren to rush around, frantically trying to find you

“y/n he’s being a dickhead again” “on it”

you all end up staying with dave until he’s sober so you can all try and explain how much of a pain in the ass he is to deal with when he’s drunk

and he doesn’t believe that you’re the only person that can control him

until chris pulls out a tape as proof

turns out he’s been recording little bits of each night out since everyone realised that you can calm darf down

the tape shows how he’s annoying to everyone, but when you come along he’ll do anything for you, even if it means calming tf down for once

“you’re an asshole to everyone BUT y/n dude, what’ve they got that we don’t?”

and he just looks at the floor and blushes

and the guys all smile, now knowing exactly why you can control darf and they can’t