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"I” Am “Me”

Written by Irina Maralit

The idea of the psychologist William James theorizes the self as when “I” reflects back upon “Me”. The mental picture of the self has to do with the knower himself and what the knower knows about himself. Based on Dan P. McAdams’ “Self and Identity”, in attempting to improve the self, three aspects of the “Me” must be taken into consideration—as a social actor, as a motivated agent, and as an autobiographical author. 

Considering the “Me” as a social actor before anything else is no surprise. We are each born as social individuals, and we are raised in various social structures. We recognize ourselves as distinct in a reflexive sense as early as in our second year of life, but we also express social emotions such as embarrassment and pride. As it goes, other people reflect who we are back to ourselves; how they react to our actions guide us in knowing who we are. 

Social conventions are also formed and can be used a basis concerning what is right and wrong—in my opinion, this can have both positive and negative implications. Nonetheless, we each still have our own “ego” that ultimately serves as the executive to initiate our own autonomy. The consistencies we then outwardly show to others or the traits by which we are defined mainly interpret the self as a social actor. I may be seen differently by the different people I am associated with because of the various social roles I play. For example, my mother might think I tend to be lazy, while my friends might think I am more diligent. I have my own “Me” as a daughter, as a friend, and as many others. Improving the self in this aspect would mean balancing out each role in a more meaningful way. 

The “Me” as a motivated agent, on the other hand, is more internal. Though we might be able to determine people’s traits or qualities through their actions, we never really know their true motivations. The self also prioritizes the motivational aspect because according to McAdams, “the inner needs, wants, desires, goals, values, plans, programs, fears, and aversions seem to give behavior its direction and purpose” (4). 

Ever since we were children, we have always been told to never lose sight of our aspirations and act accordingly. We must establish values that are specifically more significant for us now as adolescents searching for identity. It is a time to explore different paths until one is found that can be committed to. It is important to choose realistically in order to construct a clearer and more feasible plan to achieve it. Changing our motivations could shift our focus in attaining our aspirations, and even our values could change as well. For example, if I were to develop a deep newfound interest in the law, I would shift to the course of Legal Management; my values would change based on what is necessary for the new course. All in all, this aspect justifies that our motivations dictate our actions. Improving the self in this aspect would require having a clear vision of what is essentially desired. 

The last aspect of the “Me” would be as an autobiographical author. This is the last aspect because it requires a profound understanding of the present self as a product of the past; the present self will then develop into a visualized future self—“it involves achieving a sense of temporal continuity in life” (5). 

The aim of this aspect is to reconstruct the self in a way that would give meaning and purpose to one’s “narrative identity” or one’s created integrative life story. This is internalized over time after considering the “Me” as a motivated agent after the “Me” as a social actor. When one knows why he does what he does and why he wants what he wants, the reconstruction of his past can guide him to his desired future. In a simpler sense, each self has the ability to take charge of his life and write his own story—hence the term “autobiographical”. Improving the self in this aspect would allow a perception of one’s life as his own creation; this would eventually lead to the acceptance of the “Me” as the embodiment of the “I”. 

In conclusion, the topics discussed under Module 5 effectively integrate every part in not only understanding the self, but also improving it. Moreover, as the course comes to a close, I can say that each module has definitely helped in deepening my perception about the self as a whole and my own personal self.

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Block Belongingness

by Sam Altuna

As a freshman, I was admittedly lost in terms of which group of people I belonged to. Come orsem, I met the people that I would be spending the next four years with, my blockmates, but even that event wasn’t enough for me to feel like I belonged just yet. At the end of those two days, we were all still pretty much strangers to each other. During the first day of school, I yearned to be with the people that I was familiar with the most—my highschool classmates. However, despite my deep want for this to happen, different class schedules would not allow me to hangout with them. Instead, I stuck to my block mates, pushing aside the fact that I was acquaintances with most of them. During the first few weeks, I got to know them better. Slowly but surely, I was beginning to get along with them more naturally. Despite this, Pffaf-Czarnecka asks: “when do we belong?” and sheds light on the differences of belonging with and belonging to.

At first, I would classify my relationships with my block mates as simply “belonging to”. They are the first people that had the same course as me, same professors, and same break times. “Commonality is individually felt and embodied while collectively negotiated and performed” (Pffaf-Czarnecka). During my first weeks in school, I was bonded to them in a way that I shared a lot of common attributes with them. Because we were in the same block, I had a sense of belonging in this new school that I knew almost nothing about. However, this was merely on a surface level. I belonged with them since we were going through the same struggles in class, had people to rant to about annoying Ateneo things, and more, because they could relate to my experiences as well. This went on, our commonality shining through.

Commonality is a collective term, people negotiate it with one another and perform it as we see fit. We understood one another through ups and downs, through highs and lows. Although I can’t particularly say that I was close to them during the first semester of freshman year, we had binding attributes that we could not ever find in any other group of people! I don’t think any of us could have gone to our highschool friends, expecting them to understand fully what we were experiencing. Being part of our first and most crucial Ateneo moments and memories, we were bonded collectively in a way that we could never trade for anything else in the world.

This is where “belonging together” was seen through my block the most. Whereas at first we were brought together by mere fate, getting assigned to the block, we were now bonded at a whole different level. According to Hage (2002), belonging is the combined result of trust, feeling safe, community, and the sense of possibility. Through my block, I felt the most secure I had ever been in the Ateneo. Hanging out with them more made me trust them with personal things. Although I can’t say that I am close to everyone of them, there is deep understanding of respect for one another and each person’s story. Next, I felt safe with them. Always welcomed in any situation, I never felt left out when I had no one to hang out with. I could just go to whoever was free, and my problems were solved. Lastly, the sense of possibility is seen up til now, where I have room for improvement in terms of relationships with each and everyone of them. It surprises me that I can still learn so much about my blockmates even up til now, knowing them for more than a year already. I feel like my relationships with them can bloom even more, given that I genuinely enjoy their company at all times! They make me feel most at home because they are willing to grow and improve together with me.

Even though we all may be going through different classes and different situations & experiences now, belongingness isn’t linear. It may exist in different changes in life, in any status, and in any diversity. At the end of the day, I am grateful for these people that I have been destined to keep by my side til the day I graduate. Through them, I have begun the best years of my life knowing that I have people that I can count on.

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Self Branding

Written by Tami Fernando

Module 5, The Reflexive Self: The Journey of Becoming Human, is all about the idea of reflexivity or how the self that is “I” makes sense of its self that is “me”. It also talks about the interactivity as an individual makes continuous adjustments in the balance between collective and individual orientations of action. Usually, in a life story, the “self” constructs one’s identity in one’s personal narrative of the past, present and future. Students usually reflect on the self as it traverses time and navigates social spaces. Finding about who you are or questioning about who you are usually happens when you are teens and when you start having your mid-life crisis problems.

Dan McAdams made a paper about self and identity. He focuses on the question “How does a person apprehend and understand who he or she is?”. He also focuses on three metaphors – First, the self may be seen as a social actor, who enacts roles and displays traits by performing behaviors in the presence of others. Second, the self is a motivated agent, who acts upon inner desires and formulate goals, values, and plans to guide behavior in the future. Third, the self eventually becomes an autobiographical author who takes stock of life – past, present, future – to create a story about who I am, how I came to be and where my life may be going.

Normally, when someone wants to be different they ask the question “what is it you are trying to change” to themselves. This is very evident in the past few years especially because of social media. Since social media has been a key tool in changing perspectives in our world today, it also changes the idea of who we are and what we want to be. When teens look at social media websites and they see their idols, they tend to try to copy what their idols do and wear. By copying their style, are they still who they are? Knowing what you want is all about self-identity. When there are trends happening around the world, and you want to be a part of that trend, are you being who you really are or are you being someone else? Are you being the real you by going with the trend?

McAdams states the three main psychological categories that are related to how we reflect on our identities – a social actor, a motivated agent, and an autobiographical author. The sense of the self as a social actor begins to emerge at the age of around 18 months. This is because most toddlers at that age begin recognizing themselves when they see their faces in mirrors. What they see is an embodied actor who moves through space and time. Around the same time, they start to express social emotions like shame and embarrassment. As a social actor, a person may come across as friendly and compassionate, or cynical and mean-spirited. The self prioritizes the motivational qualities of human behavior—the inner needs, wants, desires, goals, values, plans, programs, fears, and aversions that seem to give behavior its direction and purpose. Developing an identity involves more than the exploration of and commitment to life goals and values, and more than committing to new roles and re-evaluating old traits. It also involves achieving a sense of temporal continuity in life—a reflexive understanding of how I have come to be the person I am becoming, or put differently, how my past self has developed into my present self, and how my present self will, in turn, develop into an envisioned future self.

Having an identity makes you different from the rest. It will make you stand out. Celebrities create their own identities and stand out because they know who they are and what they want to achieve. They create their own self branding because they know they are unique. No one should ever feel insecure about his or her own self because everyone is unique in their own special ways. Those who have mid-life crisis problems should focus on remembering who they were as kids and what they want to be when they grow up. They shouldn’t be too stressed out about what others think of them because it won’t help them be happy and content with their own lives. Knowing your own identity will create your own life narrative. Copying your idols won’t create your own personal life narrative but rather a copy also of their life. At the end of the day, would you like to be someone else you’re not or just be yourself and create your own image and your identity that will remain unique forever.

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Community Extensions

Written by Alissandra B. Intengan

Ever since I was little I loved Ateneo; it was always my dream to study here. This was because both sides of my family were from and studied in the Ateneo. One thing I got accustomed to supporting Ateneo in basketball games, even if I didn’t know much about the sport. I just knew when the ball went in, you cheer. Even before I started studying or even got accepted, I would avidly support Ateneo in basketball games in high school. My love for UAAP basketball grew. I felt like I belonged to a community I wasn’t officially part of; I was a mere extension of the actual community. I had an emotional attachment to the school and shared the same hopes (even if we were just referring to Basketball). Pfaff-Czarnecka says “belonging is an emotionally charged, ever dynamic social location – that is: a position in social structure, experienced through identification, embeddedness, connectedness and attachments […] people belong together when they share values, relations.” What it means to belong always changes because we are influenced by the constantly changing social norms. We conform to what the norm is. He also notes that it is a different subject to explore and expound on. The feeling of belonging isn’t really concrete and is a more abstract topic. It varies from person to person because only the individual feels it but it is characterized by the collective ideas brought about by the community. In my opinion, there needs to be a sense of reciprocity between the individual and the community. One feeds off what is given to them by the whole and vice versa; this establishes a cycle and boundaries for the community’s identity. That’s where the communion of the Ateneo community is evident. Just like what we learned from previous lessons, you cannot separate the individual from the community nor can you have the community without the individual. Both influence the boundaries of belonging because of the shared experiences.

All Ateneans know about our infamous rivalry with La Salle. They say the rivalry brings out the worst in everyone especially during games. Heated exchanges and rude actions make headlines and circulate on social media. There is never a game where there is no tension that builds up. We tend to go all out in support of our teams not just for the sake of the sport but for the sake of our egos and pride as Ateneans. Though we show it in different ways – and some in more extreme ways than others – there is still a community that is brought together by the love for our school.

Commonality is “a perception of sharing, notably, sharing a common lot as well as cultural forms (language, religion, and life-style), values, experience and memory constructions”. Each side really defends their namesake to no end. Speaking as an Atenean, I understand how one would feel like the community they belong to is better than the opposition because only we experience and understand what it means to be an Atenean and appreciate the Ateneo education and Ignatian formation. Our values and experiences bind us and allow us to live in solidarity with other Ateneans – whether or not we personally know them, we become one family. Any insult to one feels like an insult to who we are too. 

Commonality is collectively negotiated and performed. We support our teams with all our heart and you feel the passion and love we all have for the Ateneo when we start clapping and chanting “go ateneo!”. I would assume La Salle feels the same way. Each side complains and insults the other; we feel like the other is “bastos” even if we all do the same disrespectful thing. We can’t promise that every single person won’t get swept up in the heat of the game and the height of their emotions in order to act with class and respect. That is one thing that binds us all, as well. Our love for the game of basketball and the love for the hype you feel while watching is addicting. Despite the negativity the rivalry brings about, we are all bound by UAAP basketball and appreciate the greatness of both teams together.

With those experiences formerly mentioned, there is a social boundary between Ateneo and La Salle that will never go away. Identity “relies on sharp boundary-drawing […] and is prone to buttressing and social divisiveness”. Since both sides support their own, the disparity is more evident even if they the same motivations for their own respective groups.

It was said that “social life-worlds, including their collectivizing pressures, bear upon individual biographies”. I would say that my love for the Ateneo grew even more from when I was younger. I learned what it means to be a man for others, how to embody Magis, and what it means to live out the saying Ad Majorem Dei Gloriam. The life in the Ateneo has shaped me for the better. I now understand the attachment one develops for the school whether they are toddlers or lolos that will forever support their Alma Mater. The community has made it hard not to love it. Now I feel like I belong and I am more than a mere extension of the community.

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The Narratives

Written by Madelene Lyka O. Siapno

Despite the perception of our family, friends, and society have about us, we tell ourselves our own life story about who we are and where we are going. We make a connection to our own imagination as we reconcile with our societal contexts and make ourselves the main social character of every story. The self comes to terms with society through narrative identity (McAdams, 2008). Our idea of ourselves come in different forms such as dreams, universal life myths, our earliest memories, and the like. Even when we should know ourselves the best, our idea of self-identity often comes to a conflicting pattern and leads to a “polyphonic novel”, according to Herman’s. 

The reading on “Self and Identity” by McAdams made me rethink our own choices of change. Why do we change and what causes us to adjust to these things? I believe it is our duty to our community and the social roles we play. In playing a role in our society we must realize that it is not ourselves that we think of but other as well which reflects who we actually are. It shows, for example, what kind of person we are and if we are willing to be better for the sake of our community. Although, behind all these actions we execute and the willingness to play a better role to our society begs the question as to why we truly do these things. Is there a hidden motive behind it or does doing these things satisfy our inner needs? If we were to be honest, there is a motive for everything we do – consciously and unconsciously. We do things to make us feel better and bring us towards believing all the more that we are a good person, to get closer to our goals, or simply advancing our most important values (McAdams, 2017). 

“To be adult means among other things to see one’s own life in continuous perspective, both in retrospect and prospect.” (Erikson, 1958) Along the way, eventually we will find ourselves looking at how we got this point in our lives. This is when our very own autobiography begins and where we connect the dots as to what our purpose in this world truly means. Being able to connect our past and present can lead us into seeing what we can do or be in the near future. Creating our very own narrative in our life can tell a lot about who we are as a person because it is our derivation of our own personal experiences – it is our perspective and our very own interpretation. Nevertheless, as we tell our stories to other people, it is through their own words and feedback that we see a different side to our experiences and from there we “create new selves” or change the characters in our stories. 

The cycle of finding our identity always leads back to the culture we are raised in and the people we surround ourselves with who contribute a huge influence to who we are – favored narrative forms. It is what those we are surrounded with favor and what they approve of that changes us or lets us remain to be ourselves. Knowing your true purpose and what your life is all about, I believe, is the true formation of identity and knowing who you really are. It is our purpose that motivates us in doing the things we do and being who we are. The search of self-identity by finding and understanding ourselves in a nutshell: “Storytelling is often at the heart of the little changes, too, minor edits in the self that we make as we move through daily life, as we live and experience life, and as we later tell it to ourselves and to others.” 

In conclusion, understanding and “knowing thyself” is a never-ending cycle that we must connect with our past to the present, where we came from and where we are now, and the relationships we’ve once had and we have now. Everything constantly changes and as this happens we slowly strive in finding our ever-changing self-identity – always being modified, never gone, just overlapping. The journey in understanding who we are and why we do things is a lifelong journey, and even in the end I think that no one can ever truly say that they truly, in every aspect, know who they are.

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Doctor’s Habitus

by Samantha Altuna

The concept of habitus is clearly expounded on by Swartz in his work, The Sociology of Habit. As explained, habitus is derived from the latin verb habere which translates to “to have/hold” (Swartz, 2002). He draws information from Pierre Bourdieu’s curiosity on how an individuals habits and actions are formed and constructed. Furthermore, the theory of action is questioned— how does normal human patterns affect how a person is structured? The way that people aquire habitus is through social interaction. With this, a habitus can be formed either by conforming with what one is exposed to— imitation, repitition, role play, and game participation, or by finding one’s own way as well (Swartz, 2002). Either way, habitus is formed without us knowing it. Even I myself have to trace back to different past events to determine how I developed into the person I am today. In Module 4, The Self as Located and Constructed in the Social World, the main goal is to examine how people are affected and shaped by their surroundings, how each and every social interaction helps in the development of the self. 

As I was reading Swartz’ readings and interpretations, the main example that came into mind were my two cousins. They were brought up in a very controlled household, with two doctors for parents. Since my aunt is very particular with her children, she made sure that she had a firm eye on them at home and in school through the maids or the tutors. Aside from this, they always had to have extra-curricular sports like judo, basketball, or golf, because my aunt and uncle believes that exercise is good to stimulate the brain. I always thought that it was quite limiting to have someone watching over your each and every step. One time when I was a kid, I remember asking them if they ever felt like they were being limited. To my surprise, they both said no— I am guessing it is because they were brought up that way, and they were comfortable with it. Comparing them then and now, it is actually no surprise that they both want to be doctors (both in a medical track in high school and college), and are also both very much acquainted with golf. They are definitely their parents’ children, developing a habitus that clearly resonates well with their family and their upbringing. According do Swartz, “Habitus generates self-fulfilling prophecies according to different class opportunities”. To shed more light on my example, my cousins come from a highly conservative and controlled environment. Other than that, they are 100% Chinese, wherein their parents aimed to shape them into future doctors like them as well. Early on in their lives, they were brought to their parents’ surgeries to watch and observe as well as their dad’s Sunday gold games if they wished to play with him which is where imitation, repitition, role play, and game participation likely developed from. Their family had the money and the resources to bring their kids up the way they wanted to. Knowing this, one can see the unconscious calculation of how social order came into play, given that they had the resources to accommodate this path that they opt to take. In human practices, Bourdeiu also presents two models of Capital and Field. Capital works well with this example because their family as enough financial stability to aim high in terms of career. This is also why people in different social order will almost definitely have a different habitus from a person in a different class. With their whole life education accounted for, it is no wonder that they acquired the habitus. However, Swartz wants readers to take note that just because there is some sort of predictability or regularity, doesn't mean that everything is the product of routinized habit. Instead, Habitus is constructed by both the past and present. Just because one was brought up to become this sort of person does not automatically mean that he will adhere to this life set for him. There are still numerous events that may constitute his habitus.  

Although my cousins might not know it, they are both shaped not only by their individualistic selves, but by the people surrounding them as well. From the moment they were born, they have been in a controlled environment that taught them to admire it where people might question it. Having very hands-on parents around them, they continued to idolize them and their behaviors, developing a habitus that they will continue to use until they become the people they aim to be— wether their occupational and recreational priorities change in their youth, or if they continue to follow the path that they envisioned for themselves as a product of their upbringing. 

SOURCES:

Swartz, David (2002). The Sociology of Habit: The Perspective of Pierre Bourdieu. The Occupational Therapy Journal of Research. 61-69 

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Injustice: The Nature of Human Society?

Written by Irina Celine B. Maralit

The fourth module focuses on the self in a more social aspect. Despite our individuality, we are all still innately social beings; our attitudes and mindsets can be influenced by different social structures. Living in a society that perpetuates injustice poses as a challenge that each of us must withstand and change.

The first chapter of Daniel Dorling’s “Injustice: Why Social Inequality Persists?” presents its readers with five main tenets that foster injustice in our society. These are, namely, elitism is efficient, exclusion is necessary, prejudice is natural, greed is good and despair is inevitable. As said in the reading, one of the foremost reasons why social inequality exists in multiple countries is because those who believe in these tenets are mostly those in power. They believe that power and dominance go hand in hand; they view the people they supposedly serve as inferior to them. Their beliefs do not change because they do not acknowledge that there is any need for change. This, in turn, obstructs the alleviation of social inequalities.

How do these tenets come into play and how do these all connect to one another? Because of the superior way of thinking of those in authority, elitism is seen as efficient. There is an accepted separation between those who govern and those being governed. Institutions that claim to be against elitism actually endorse it through common nepotism. With established social hierarchies, those who are underprivileged are perceived as delinquents.

Elitism results in the justification of exclusion in society. The mindset that it is necessary and more practical to exclude further highlights the unfair advantage given to those who are more privileged. Ironically, attempts to reduce social exclusion only give even more emphasis to the divide. Those unjustly excluded from social norms are referred to as the debarred.

With people purposely debarred, prejudice would consequently come naturally. These preconceived notions lead to discrimination, despite its being unfounded. Elitism and exclusion can be both causes and effects of prejudice. Though some forms of prejudice may not be put out explicitly, bigotry or bias is implied. The less fortunate are constantly victimized as they are labeled as toxic and worthless. Immigrants are seen as parasites. The disabled are seen as incompetent. These are only a few of the victims who are discarded. Campaigns that aim to minimize prejudice may stimulate even more hate from society. Even the media sometimes unintentionally encourages discrimination. Racism is probably the most rampant form of discrimination at present.

To what extent is desire accepted? Greed, as we all know, is defined as the excessive and selfish desire for something. While it may be true that greed results in growth, would it be so crucial even if it were at another person’s expense? In today’s society, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer; there is a need to keep consuming. Having a lot would mean wanting a lot, and a cycle of continuous obtaining forms from self-interest. Even some academic disciplines inexplicitly advocate greed. There are those who get by extra luxuriously, and there are the victims, or the debtors, who struggle with simply getting by.

All these inequalities established and accepted in society leave majority at a disadvantage. Since a lot are at the far and unfavorable end of the spectrum, despair definitely is inevitable. Is this really our modern world—where loss of hope is considered unavoidable? The good news is that the victims of this tenet, the depressed, are finally being recognized through awareness. Mental illnesses are now given more importance as compared to before; in the Philippines, the mental health bill has just recently been approved.

Are we really going to wait for despair before acting out? Each distinct set of victims struggle day by day. Ignorance or indifference still causes injustice to continue. It is not enough to not hold unjust beliefs; it is important to actively falsify these and speak out. According to Dorling, “we stumbled into a crisis that no one denies was of our own making” (9) and “to say that some people are more human than others is unjust” (10). These mentioned inequalities and injustices are merely just human social constructs. The problem is that what is currently accepted in society is far from true social justice, and each of us have a role to play for the betterment of our nature.

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Ways of Perception - Habitus

Written by Tami Fernando 

Module 4, The Self as Located and Constructed in the Social World, examines the social dimensions of the social construction of one’s self. There’s recognition of intersubjectivity, wherein the members of the society have the tendency to arrive at common constructions and shared interpretations of reality. It’s about the agency of self, having the capacity to accommodate and resist given cultural and social patterns. David Swartz’s reading, The Sociology of Habit: The Perspective of Pierre Bourdieu, exemplified many examples of what the third module is, mainly on the topic habitus. Habitus focuses on the question, how is human action regulated?

According to the reading, habitus was derived from the word habere, which means “to have” or “to hold”.  Habitus, as described by Bourdieu, is as system of durable, transposable dispositions, structured structures, as principles which generate and organize practices and representations that can be objectively adapted to their outcomes. An example given was about children, who were brought up in family of athletes, are far more likely to develop their own sports abilities and acquire the depositions, than if they were raised in a family of musicians. That example mainly focuses on the idea of “structured structures”. The dispositions of the children were acquired informally through experience of social interactions, by process of imitation, repetition, role play and game participation.

This reading reminded me of the royal family in the UK. They’re born into their desired roles and responsibilities in this world. The characteristics that each of the members of the royal family were either passed down through heredity or they were acquired through the experiences they have while growing up. They don’t really have a choice to be who they want to be but they were brought up in special ways which makes them who they are individually. In our world, yeah you can choose to be whoever you want to be but at the same time, you also adapt some characteristics from the people around you that you don’t necessarily notice. In growing up, your parents do certain actions and eventually, you tend to adapt those habits and those habits will be a crucial role in creating your own identity. Just like how the different princes and princesses adapt the action of the queen because of their lifestyle in their castles.

It was also stated that habitus gives practices particular manner or style. The disposition of habitus identifies certain individuals as risk takers, others as cautious, some as bold, others as timid, etc. The idea of disposition suggests that post socialization “predisposes” individuals to act out what they have internalized from the past experiences but does not determine them to do so. The dispositions of habitus shape and orient human action; they do not determine it. Humans have in varying degrees the capacity for critical reflexivity -  the ability to reflect rationally and critically on their own take-for-granted ways of acting.

Another example that is related to habitus is how students in college tend to change their way of communicating with one another. Growing up, parents always teach their children about what the proper words to say are or what words not to say. Children then slowly start to realize when they get to school that each person has a different way of communicating with one another. So their way of communicating depends on how most of the kids talk to each other. Just like how let’s say a prince goes to a normal school, he will eventually talk differently when he is with his relatives and differently when he is with his schoolmates. There could also be instances wherein he will suddenly accidentally say words that are inappropriate to the situations because it was a force of “habit”. You can’t necessarily remove the habits you’ve had for so long, but you can learn to adapt new habits as well to fit in to the new “society” you are entering to.

Habits are a driving force of human conduct. Human practices emerge from the encounter of individual units with certain types and amounts of capital, certain dispositions, and certain fields. Habits are not only constituted by past experiences of socialization but also the ongoing practices involved in an individual’s life.

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Social Construct

Written by Madelene Lyka O. Siapno

We all begin with a blank slate, having nothing but where we came from. Even before we are born and when we come to this world we have already formed a sense of identity and from there we — like how everyone starts to know what kind of person they want to be or what they want to pursue in life — continue to develop the skills, talents, and traits we have. These certain skills, talents, and traits have been passed onto us or are heavily influenced by those we are constantly surrounded which is most of the time our family.

As we have come across the discussion regarding structures and habitus, specifically on the reading on Schwartz, the study shows us that as our identity forms through the years it is influenced by social status, your education attainment, and what field / career you will be going into or are in. These habits that we learn as time goes by are self-perpetuating due to what is expected of us in the long run. They are most especially formed in family and is exemplified in child-rearing attitudes. 

Scrutinizing the type of person I came to be, my disposition, goals and interests it would be common sense to say that all these were made or contributed by my family — most especially by my parents. Although, behind all this what process did I have to go to to be influenced this way? As mentioned earlier, it begins in childhood and what social class you come from. Growing up, my siblings and I were always exposed to sports and anything that required us to use our energy up. Being taught this as we grew up, it was always a goal to be part of any sports team, and even though we got tired of it a year after we would always find ways to learn another sport for the sake of it. 

Despite the influence our society and family have on us, there will always be times wherein we do not agree to certain actions and mindsets; sometimes because of this we find ourselves out of the loop which makes us choose to conform with these standards and norms instead. To further elaborate on this, an example is our perception of sexuality wherein a lot of us may say that it is okay to be bisexual, gay, lesbian and yet at the end of the day we still find ourselves saying things like, “That’s so gay!”, as if it were wrong to be that way. It is evident that this mindset has lessened through the years and most especially with those who are educated seeing that we were taught to have respect for these individuals by the schools we go to or the people who have raised us. 

In comparison to how we the upper-middle class and lower class grow up, we were raised differently and sometimes even freely so that we create our own dispositions and are not nurtured well enough. Families in upper-middle class deliberately try to stimulate their child’s development and be involved in some way in whatever they are doing, continuously exposing them to different types of socialization as well as recreational and cultural opportunities. This allows us to develop a sense of self-direction, entitlement and can assert themselves in their rights. While the the way of raising children in the working / lower class has a more “natural growth” approach whereas they give them all the freedom and may leave them unsupervised and it is highly unlikely that they frequently expose them to different activities that may further hone their cognitive and social skills. The natural growth approach results then to independent, street smart, obedient and conform-to-authority children. 

Habitus in a nutshell is both a structured structure wherein you were socialized to be that way and a structuring structure in which you, yourself reinforce the given habitus. From there on we become this self-fulfilling prophecy that we embody and shape this habitus. In the end it is really up to us and societal expectations that form our identity because who we are is where we are — the generation, society, and standards.

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Habitus: Structurally Structured

By Maria Alissandra B. Intengan

We’ve grown up with a very distinct notion of how girls should carry themselves and how boys need to be. It’s a stereotypical framework that has been considered the norm up until recently, when everybody started recognizing new genders. Freud, a very popular psychologist had very dark ideas of the minds of men and women. He based his analyses on the innate sexual desires he claims all humans have. Thus the birth of the concepts of the Oedipus and Electra complexes.

Swartz in his reading “The Sociology of Habit” states that there are three schools of thought that govern habitus. Those are behaviorism, rational choice, and conformity to cultural roles. Behaviorism suggests that a person doesn’t just act on the triggers of stimulus, they act based on past experiences. You develop these responses through time which are also influenced by social and cultural backgrounds. We also don’t do every single thing after careful and rational calculation. We do things with a “taken-for-granted degree of awareness.” Conformity to cultural roles, on the other hand, isn’t mere conformity but the adoption of what is considered to be the norm.

The Oedipus complex is when a boy develops a sexual attraction to his mother. The Electra complex is when a girl develops a sexual attraction to her father. For both cases, Freud suggests the child unconsciously imitates and takes after the parent of their same gender in order to eventually garner the love of their desired parent. Generations ago, this was Freud’s explanation as to why females were raised as girls and males were raised as boys.

Going back to the idea of habitus, or habit, we embody what we have internalized since our earliest stages of child development. Imitation and repetition are two critical elements needed to form these habits. As children, we are sponges. Children are able to absorb all that they see and experience which later on form their character and identity. Someone more exposed to athletics as a child will be more inclined to develop athletic interests and skills than a person who is more immersed in purely educational material. Our parents are responsible for fostering our behavior, basing it on what they allow us to be exposed to. Swartz said, “Habitus generates perceptions, expectations, and practices that correspond to the structuring properties of earlier socialization”.

However, these are mere structures. It’s like a maze. Your initial instincts aren’t random; where you choose to go first is suggested by your thoughts which are past experiences and memories that are embedded. These are your habits. But eventually, when you start figuring out your way around the maze, your volition comes into play. You are able to manipulate the situation because of your ability to choose to follow your instinct/what you were taught or if you strategize based on the information you have garnered thus far. You are grounded by your past but are able to improvise based on strategy, like Swartz said.

There is a structure when it comes to raising kids. Parents usually raise their children according to the gender they are born and reinforce each gender’s “habits”. The children, also, naturally follow suit. It’s a mental habit to automatically do this as parents. As children, we slowly start developing the traits we see in our parents as we grow older. We take after the parent of our same gender because of the different guidelines we are each given: boys are taught to pee standing up, girls are taught to sit down; boys are more often than not introduced to superhero cartoons and such, while girls are given Barbie dolls and princess books; boys are made to wear pants, girls are made to wear floral and skirts. It’s not a conscious thing but it’s a natural instinct because that’s the way society has raised itself.

As we age and discover even more options, discover more things that we like, we find our own groove. You end up marching to the beat of your own drum, and at this day and age, it is more acceptable. Boys don’t have to fall in love with girls, there are such thing as homosexuals. A girl can dress up as a boy and still be straight. The person is way more complex than it was considered to be a few generations ago. Angelina Jolie’s daughter Shiloh is given complete liberty to dress according to how she wants and this started from a very young age. She started dressing up as a little boy and Angelina Jolie allowed her. As a parent, you are responsible for structuring your child’s life to naturally form the habits that coincide with the environments they are exposed to. But because parents aren’t the only external forces in a child’s life, a parent needs to understand the human agency embedded in every person. They naturally become their own person and grow into who they are.

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Hidden Identities

By Tami Fernando 

Module 3, Dynamics of Self and Others in Close Relationships, is more into social dynamics in microsystem relationships. It examines how family, peer, intimate relations, interactions in digital spaces, and wider societal and cultural discourses are associated with the dynamics and functioning of the self in relation to others. Danny Miller’s reading, what is the relationship between identities that people construct, express and consume online and those offline,

exemplifies the third module well because he tackles the different topics one by one. He starts by introducing the topic of identity then talks about the problems and consequences of both offline and online identities.

Miller states that there is no single or consistent theory of offline identity. Today, we think more in terms of chosen or multiple identities. Identity is associated as a constantly re-worked personal narrative striving for coherence. Identity is clearly a varied historical and cultural condition both adopted rather than a given psychological state. But what are the problems with the concept of online identity? Currently, a lot of people assume that social networking sites are the latest forms of internet activity. It’s meant for people to explore new forms of identity, shift identity with relative freedom to be whoever.

The most common forms wherein having an online identity is involved include: Social Network Sites, Blogging, Twitter, Gaming, Personal webpages and much more. The most common forms reveal that almost every online platform contains contradictions within itself, such as private vs. public blogging or posting. They tend to change radically overtime and all of which reinforces the initial point that a generic concept of online identity is increasingly problematic. When people create their own accounts using social media sites, I believe they get excited since they get to be show who they are in a different way. Personally, I find it hard expressing myself and I find it easier when I do it online. An example of this is when I used to have major fights with the certain friend of mine – I found it easier expressing myself through messaging rather than talking to her personally. I sort of feel pressured if I have to argue with someone personally. Another example of having a different identity online is when you see the really shy people in school tweet and post of a lot of photos and videos. They feel like they’re free to do whatever they want because they can easily just brush aside the negative feedbacks they get. It’s like no one can stop them from doing what they want.

As stated also in the reading there are many consequences with both online and offline identities. One of the most significant observations of the consequences of online identity, are for populations who feel that they only achieved real identity online. Online identity remains largely contrasted with “real life”, mainly because of the issue of conservatism. Parents’ fear of children’s orientation to online appears to reflect a more general concern with their loss of control over their children. Bloggers for example, they’re free to post or comment on anything they want. Some bloggers are unidentified while others really say who they are. They don’t care about what other people think of their posts. They just keep putting whatever they feel or whatever they want others to know without any filters. Sometimes, those bloggers only feel like they’re free when they’re behind their computers. When there are instances of personal communication with them, they tend to be more conservative with what they say because they start being conscious. At the end of the day, it really depends on the identity you have.

It is impossible to make claims about the consequences of online for offline identity unless one studies both of these together with respect to the same populations. It is the studies that include offline identity that have been consistently more skeptical of claims to radical consequences of offline identity. I think there should be more focused on the reasons why they tend to have different identities rather than knowing the consequences. As time changes, everything around us changes also.

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Identity & Society

Written by Madelene Lyka O. Siapno

Although we are in charge of who we become, our peers, family, and societal context play a significant role in our identity formation. In our society today, there are a certain set of standards and norms that we should follow in order to be considered a normal-functioning adult – what we should or shouldn’t be, and how we should and shouldn’t act. In terms of sexuality and sex, there were always certain rules that were to be followed and sometimes the other gender could get away with just about anything since that’s simply how it was and what we were taught. 

In Moore’s, “Issues for Gay and Lesbian Adolescent”, it addresses issues regarding adolescent romance, sexuality, and the double standards – that for as long as we can remember – were imposed to us by society. If men were to have casual sex it was to prove themselves and boost their ego’s. However, if women were to do it, they would be slut-shamed and judged because women, according to our society, are not allowed to express their sexual drives and do it for self-satisfaction. As a result of this double standard, intimacy for a majority of adolescent boys, was simply for experimentation whilst for women it is for security and an expression of love. They can contribute to overall self-esteem (Harter 1999) and to beliefs about attractiveness and self-worth (Kuttler et al. 1999), but can be a hindrance to identity development since we base our actions and our thinking of on how we can gain their affection. 

Being in a relationship during these years also meant a raise in status among your peers, and personally boosts your self-esteem and confidence knowing that someone actually sees something in you. In spite of the fact that this is common in countries such as North America, Europe, and Australia, this doesn’t seem to be the case in Asian countries wherein family relations are focused on more, according to Robert Moore. A more conservative attitude was to be displayed to sexual expression, and expressions of love were regarded as inappropriate. “In traditional cultures, these authors suggest, familial obligations and social expectations dictate attitudes to romance and there are constraints on choice of a marriage partner. 

As I finished this reading, it struck me how much influence our society and our environment affects our views and opinions – how our culture has an immense impact on our actions and the way we think. It is unfortunate how we have to live a way in order to please others, because if we do not conform with the norms we will be shamed and judged for simply living our life the way we want to. It is in this very type of thinking that we see gender inequality. Why can’t we just have the same set of rules for both women and men? We, from the very start, were brain-washed into thinking in a way that men can have just about anything while women must suffer the consequences. 

It is in these things wherein we have to control our identity formation instead of exploring freely and doing what we want without the consent of those around us. I believe this becomes a hindrance, in a way, to who we actually are and what we want to be like. It is not our responsibility to adjust to the likings of others, but for them to adjust to who we are.

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Sex in the Modern World

Written by Irina Celine B. Maralit

“Sexuality in Adolescence” by Moore and Rosenthal is a relevant reading because it approaches the social context of sex and other related topics such as gender, sexuality and romance. 

In other countries, sex education is standard in schools and included in a student’s curriculum starting from an early age. In the Philippines, on the other hand, the topic of sex is considered controversial. People would argue that allowing sex education in the country would only corrupt children’s minds and encourage them to engage in premarital sex. With Christianity as the dominant religion in the Philippines, it is no surprise that many conservative religious groups deem the issue as unnecessary and immoral. 

The social context of sex in the Philippines is suppressed and therefore misconstrued. I personally believe that sex education is needed in the Philippines and that there are many misconceptions about it that need to be addressed. The reading reveals information from the Health Development Agency of the UK government stating that there is no evidence that the provision of sex education increases the frequency of sex. If anything, it properly educates adolescents about sex and other related matters including relationships, physical and emotional development, sexual responsibility and health care. Age should not be an issue in sex education; in fact, if these misconceptions are addressed early on, it would help build a sense of responsibility and awareness in each individual and would lead him or her to make informed and smart choices in a given situation. 

As for the religious aspect of the issue, the reading states that it may provide structure under the context of sex, but excessively restrictive grounds could possibly compel adolescents to find other institutions to serve as an outlet for their urges. Christianity teaches the importance of chastity, and how abstinence is expected from each person as a sign of obedience to Christ. While this instills discipline and gives importance to sex as a means for procreation after marriage, it does little to promote dialogue between the Church and its followers on the issue extensively. Thus, some adolescents will feel less welcome in the religious community if they engage in premarital sex, and will likely decrease their involvement from the Church in the long run. 

The detachment from religion, brought on by the increase in premarital sex in Asian countries - including the Philippines - can be attributed as one of the effects of globalization. Globalization has allowed the Filipino youth access to Western culture, wherein magazines, tv shows and music embrace sex more openly as compared to Asian countries. While the topic of sex remains behind closed doors in Filipino families, adolescents who have easily adapted to global trends have access to numerous "youth spaces" such as bars, clubs, and even get-togethers with friends wherein they can explore their sexuality. 

The next issue would be whether gender differences really do result in different motives when it comes to sex. According to the reading, boys are said to prioritize pleasure; sex is a way for them to assure their maturity and raise their social status. Conversely, girls are said to prioritize emotional closeness; sex is a way for them to express love and achieve intimacy. While there is some distinction between male and female motives for sex, it is clear that these differences continue to exist because they are supported and even encouraged by society itself. To illustrate, boys living in today's society are accepted, or even "praised" for being sexually active. They are expected to initiate and engage in these sexual conquests with women in order to fulfill their own desires, which is in line with their traditional role as the dominant, assertive members of society. The opposite, then, would happen if girls are known to be sexually active because of conservative views etched in Philippine society. Since Filipinas are expected to save themselves for marriage and to be dependent on their husbands, women who break the status quo are criticized, looked down upon, and even labeled as "promiscuous" or called "sluts." Even in media, it is common for girls to be personified as “damsels in distress” who need “saving” from a boy figure. 

In conclusion, numerous factors such as religion, globalization and socialization constantly attempt to construct and redefine the meaning of sex. With it comes the gender roles that must be met by both males and females, as dictated by society. While the views on sex by both genders are slowly converging due to the progression of new ideas and practices, conservative values are still embedded in the foundation of Philippines society. What is needed is not a total transformation, but rather a space for discussion, where the young and old, traditional and liberal voices can interact and share ideas that will help both parties understand and support each other.

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New Genres of Friendship

Written by Maria Alissandra B. Intengan

What we could consider as the most millennial job is being a Youtuber. Miller says that “the online” has become infested with diverse fields and “there is no reason to assume consistency between them”; they are their own platforms. They have opened opportunities for social relation in numerous ways. These youtubers, however, break down the boundaries of privacy to get views. They open themselves up and create a personality that captivates their viewers and eventually, they build a following through the content they post. They make a living off their talent and creativity and create an avenue for new relationships with people they have never met.

Miller in “What is the relationship between identities online and offline”, says “identity is a constantly re-worked personal narrative striving for coherence”. The field of Youtube is a relatively new. Youtubers always tell their stories of before they got into this job; they were so lost, trying to find themselves and their groove in life. They experimented with different hobbies until finding Youtube, which brought out their passion in and for life.

Because of the sense of anonymity and the feeling of being alone while doing it, people that tend to be shy come of their shell online. They are able to project a personality that doesn’t necessarily coincide with their usual embodiment. They have absolute freedom to choose who they want themselves to be known as; what they want people to see. The computer screen has become somewhat a universal filter. To some extent, one is able to regulate personal information. But the tricky thing is trying to control the fluidity of information on the internet. Information is disseminated at the snap of a finger and can reach the farthest of places. Not one person has complete control over everything. One small mistake and that piece of information can be spread without your consent.

One attack people have about online activity is the offline activity it, in turn, replaces. Both online and offline compete for the consumer’s time. Miller says that we long for the past, the time before virtual society. But the communities it has now created are a different genre of friendship and relationships. The Youtube community has created millions of “parasocial relationships”. These are basically one-sided friendships because viewers feel a strong connection and real friendship with the influencer they are watching though they have never met. They feed off what the Youtube personality has chosen to show and present to them whether it is real or fake.

These internet relationships youtubers have with their viewers allow for a space safe for them to share their personal lives with the Internet. A bond has been established because viewers feel an attachment towards the youtuber. With the youtuber sharing their entire life, and bringing their viewers along through their vlogs, it is not surprising that youtubers feel like their viewers are a part of their lives. That is where the boundaries of privacy get hazy. You give and share so much of yourself that you make yourself vulnerable in a way. You are open to cyber-bullying which Miller says is a common problem among the younger demographic. When it comes down to it, we all have a responsibility to ourselves and our identity. These internet avenues are a means of bridging the gaps between communities and establishing connections to somewhat feel like we belong on a social scale.

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Growing and Understanding

Written by Samantha Alison L. Altuna

Schacter’s reading dictates that there are always identity agents that surround the development of children. They are the individuals who actively interact with these children with the intention of influencing them in some way. He points out that there are exactly six components of identity agency that propels identity formation to be put in motion. The first is Identity Concern which deals with the child’s social and ego identity as he or she develops in the world. Second are the Goals that simply favors other identity content which will be some of the core concepts of a child’s identity development. Third is called Praxis. This is when identity agents act on the goals implemented and take it into their responsibility to help the individual achieve them. Fourth is the Assessment which basically speaks for itself. It is the addressing and assessment of self and socio cultural context of identity. Fifth is Implicit Theory which essentially guides the development of self. Lastly, there is Reflexivity. This is where one has the chance to reflect on overall identity, choosing to refine its goals and practice. (455)

In this reading, what first came to mind as I saw the title Identity Agents: Parents as Active and Reflective Participants in Their Children’s Identity Formation is the multi cultural family that I grew up in. You see, I’m half Filipino and half Chinese, but I must say that I’ve somehow chosen to structure my identity on more of one culture than the other. I’ve come to the conclusion that this is because I was more integrated into my Chinese side, and in turn, my family members expressed a large identity concern and instilled more core competencies that I have helped me develop my character today.

My mother’s side is what you call the typical conservative Chinese family. Growing up, I was with them more than my dad’s side because my house was nearer to my relatives, and my mom had a lot of siblings which led to a lot of family gatherings. I was with them so much so that I became desensitized to the culture there, making it my norm. For example, I am very used to calling my relatives “auntie” and “uncle”, calling grandparents “ama” or “angkong”. I also grew up practicing a lot of traditions like moon cake festival, chinese new year, and death anniversary. Since I was a child in this very Chinese-centered time of my life, I thought it was what everyone did. When I got in touch with my dad’s side a little more, I was surprised that people called each other differently like tito and tita, and their practices were different as well. Where my chinese family was more reserved, my dad’s side was very much more vocal. I actually believe having a culture shock as a child because I couldnt comprehend the changes. I now believe that I was like this because my parents brought me up with more instilled traditional chinese values. Since they chose to expose me to my mom’s side more, my identity was more tailored to be like them as well. They were the first people to help me get in touch with identity formation.

Other than cultural lifestyle, my family showed a lot of identity concern in terms of what I was learning, both in social and educational context. Early on, I was taught to use flash cards to study because according to my mom, it stimulates the growth of the brain more. Good study habits were taught early on because my parents value work ethic and quality, which is why I have become very grade conscious when presenting to them my overall work for the year. What influenced them to instill these habits in me is because their parents were disappointed in them when they were children. They both grew up in the province, and their provincial parents were well acquainted with consequences of belt hitting (on the bum), therefore they made sure that I would be someone that their parents would be proud of as well. When it came to games and Tv, I had controlled media use as to not ruin my learning. When it came to movies with ‘love scenes’ (as a kid, this was kissing scenes) I was taught to close my eyes, along with my other cousins. Since as I said, my family is conservative, this was their way of expressing distaste to relationships in an early stage because they are uncomfortable giving the children of the family ‘the talk’. I must say, though, that this method was able to put the message out as well.

Aside from my parents, my friends were a big identity agents in my opinion. After 3rd grade, my little brother became my parent’s priority so they in turn became more hands off with me. I know that they love me, but the way i interpreted this was that I could do anything I wanted because I didn’t have to rely on them anymore. This twisted my thinking and made me immerse myself with my friends more and it later on evolved to me rather spending time with friends than family— which still holds true until now. The friends I had growing up were very artistic in drawing. I remember them encouraging me to make art like them, and to fit in with them, I tried it out. Since I liked them so much, I started getting into art and appreciating art. Growing older, I’ve evolved out of my drawing stages and into my digital art stage. Nontheless, I don’t think I would be as skilled as I am now in graphic arts without my friends helping me in this certain part of my identity.

To conclude, like Schacter, I believe that identity agents are crucial in a  child’s development. Although the child may not see it, the people that they are surrounded with do play a big part in the way their character and identity is influenced, even in the long run.

Sources:

Schachter, E. (2008). Identity Agents: Parents as Active and Reflective Participants in Their Children’s Identity Formation. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 18(3), pp.457-469.

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Singularity

Written by Madelene Lyka O. Siapno

Life is defined by the roles we play, and the roles we play are determined by who we are as an individual. Constant change and the passing of time has proved time and again that we are never really the same person as we used to be. Every experience, obstacle, and human being we encounter and go through, changes us in ways of perspective, actions, and emotions. 

Jane Kroger explained in her second chapter, “Adolescence as identity synthesis” of “Identity in Adolescence”, that identity is formed by our life history as well as the presiding cultural and historical context. At times, we are often confused as to who we actually are because of the adjustments we have to make in order to satisfy societal expectations. The development of our identity is hindered when one feels that he/she must persistently show a front to be perceived as a well-functioning adult; though every so often, we find ourselves being influenced by the very fact our individuality is likened to someone else – it may be someone we know or someone we don’t. In these comparisons, we find ourselves imitating or wanting to be someone else and confused with who we actually are. 

Identity development begins the second we are born into this world, and is structured in our childhood wherein as mentioned earlier, are being compared to others and assume their roles. From the roles we assume, we gather some of their traits, characteristics, and parts of their personality to apply these to ourselves; then on, we select which ones we actually want to become and the parts we would discard depending on our own values and interests. Every one of us are influenced by the people we are surrounded with and our environment, and it is our decision on who exactly we want to be like. 

In Kroger’s, “Adolescence as identity synthesis”, we come across the term epigensis which simply means that one item develops on top of another in space and time. We can relate this to human individuality as it is ever-changing. We cannot be defined by one word, a phrase, nor a simple sentence. Who we are can never be compared or deemed as similar to who we were a few years ago, and probably not even who we were yesterday. As time goes on, we stumble upon different knowledge and events that in a way changes us – not necessarily extensively but with the little things. Though essentially who we once were can never be lost, but is merely piled together. Simply put, our identity is not fixed but is constantly evolving to one’s needs and circumstance. We look for ways to modify ourselves based on the situations we are put in; we conform with the norms to be able to understand and get along with the people in our environment. 

Erik Erikson’s life-cycle schemes were also mentioned in the chapter wherein he believes that we must go through a series of stages in life in order to actually develop a sense of identity in the society and to have a sense of purpose. These stage resolutions and experiences pave the way in balancing our positive and negative poles that determine an individual’s characteristics mode of adapting to environment, and it begins in everyone’s infancy up to their last breath. I personally believe that Erikson’s Theory of Development works in many ways and sometimes it may seem that we must go back to these stages in order to move on to the next level of knowing and finding ourselves. In a nutshell, identity formation is a lifelong development. Adolescence plays a big role in the very singularity of each individual because from here we begin to address and make decisions regarding our future vocation, ideological, and relational issues. Our identity does not come from the mere fact that we are human, but comes from the singularity of each experience that we go through. 

Who am I? Who are we? It will probably be one of the hardest questions we will ever have to come across. A question that one cannot fully answer – not by anyone, and not even by ourselves. We are the things we go through, the air we breathe, the words we speak, the generation we partake, the societal context of our existence, and the people we surround ourselves with. It is continuous, constant, and ever-changing until the very last breathe of the life we live.

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Ulterior Motives

Written by Samantha Altuna

In the beginning of Goffman’s reading, he quotes Shakespeare wherein he mentions that life is a stage and we, the people, are all merely actors in it. I find it quite interesting how Goffman dissects this quote, explaining it in a higher level. His reading dictates that people naturally change the way they approach an individual based on the existing information they know about them already. The term he used for information-seeking among others is “sign-vehicles” wherein one can actively access information about someone. For people that you have just met, social setting, cues, and projection can easily be a tell-tale to gauge how that person actually is. An example is through appearance or stereotyping. People naturally act a certain way depending on the situation they are in or the people they are with. The impressions formed in different contexts allow humans to act based on it, whether they are aware of it or not. The main point is still quite clear— how we present ourselves to others is very important to any individual. 

Although most of the time, observing how people act in the setting you are in can usually help a person, whether because they gain new friends or new experiences through it, I want to dive into its more negative side.  As stated earlier, Goffman quoted Shakespeare when he said that we are all merely actors on stage. But what if in this example, a person really is acting in order to gain trust for the wrong reasons? Last month, my very own mother was scammed by a person she called a friend, although I must admit that his scheme was played out in a very smart manner. She knew of this guy which I will refer to as “Jason” when he added her on facebook. As social beings, people today tend to turn to social media to widen one’s network, and overall, connect with others. It is this generations way of projecting ones self to the world because information about others is so easily gained from it. My mother accepted his request after careful assessing based on 1. The number of mutual friends that they had, and 2. His profile, which looked friendly enough. Family pictures were on it and this immediately would give anyone the impression of a wholesome human. Goffman states that first-impressions are crucial in the communicative process because this is what will ultimately steer the rest of their interactions in most cases. 

You see, my mom works in the network-marketing business, and firmly believes in expanding business through meeting new people referred by others. Jason joined my mom’s business events for a whole 6 months, not only gaining her trust, but her friends’ trust as well. He would often even approach my mom, asking questions about her business as if he was truly interested in what was going on. Not to mention that he was a gay man, which puts into play the stereotyping factor that allows people to predict interaction with someone. The stereotype of gay men is usually quite friendly and quirky, two very notable characteristics that Jason displayed, which allowed my mom warm up to him even more. The way he influenced my mom’s group of friends to think of him due to his impressions worked perfectly in the scam that he was about to do.  Things took a turn during the day that he asked to meet up with my mom and a few of her friends to talk more about her company, and what it could provide for him. My mom who was always eager to expand her business naturally made time for him, agreeing that they meet up in a coffee shop. This is where they had one of their first “genuine” (if one can still call it that) encounters because before and after the meeting, they were gossiping about friends and talking as people who trusted each other in general. In this scenario, although my mom didn’t know Jason very well, by talking about the most human things and ultimately defining the situation, he was able to predict my mom’s response to his projection of this average-joe guy. After their conducive meeting, it was certain that Jason had finally gained my mother’s 100% trust. After the act that he displayed, I don’t blame her when she let the following happen: she left him for about a minute so she could go to the toilet, leaving her laptop, projector, and a couple of extra phones behind. This is where Jason’s scheme came to an end as he left with all her belongings, my mom never finding him or her items ever again. 

I think this example is enough testament to how powerful presenting one’s self is to others. Although one can use it for good, it can always be ultimately used for the bad. As we are actors on a stage, people must be wary to detect when an individual is simply using impressions or warping their identities in order to take hold of a situation, as it is painfully exemplified by Jason the scammer. At the end of the day, the bottom line is that interaction and projection can hold so much more power than one thinks.