ready-for-tea-time

[ready-for-tea-time]

My Mysterious Teacher’s Assistant (3/3)

Hello lovelies!!! Y’all ready for the final part of this crazy series??? Let’s recap in case.

                                                      Recap Start

+ Richard ended being security for a bad man named Bob in Cuba who sold bad things

+ The US asked Richard to help them get a dude out of the situation, who ended up being his best friend, Steve, from when they were kids

+ Bob found out there’s someone sneaky in the ranks, but don’t know who

+ Bob and his booby guards try to pull a gun on Richard’s bestie and Richard takes the shot instead

+ Everyone leaves and Steve gets up right as rain cause he’s got a damn bullet proof vest

+ Richard’s sister had some finance trouble with a gang in Colombia and they were not happy about that

+ Gang sends some goons over but Steve comes to the rescue!

+ Richard and his fam make a quick getaway with the old car and clothes switch- a-roo

+ Richard and his family take on new names and go to the US and unfortunately the US is dumb so sometimes they think people who are here legally aren’t so he thought he might have to move to Canada

                                                      Recap Finish

Now let’s begin...🍵🍵🍵🍵🍵

So, it’s the last few classes before finals and we’re waiting there so we can discuss our final paper (believe me, it was terrifying to write). He comes in and is all smiling, nothing is really wrong, but something feels...off...

Suddenly, this woman comes in and stands in the back of our class. She doesn’t say a word. She stands there, arms crossed, staring at Richard. Platinum blond, short bob, black trench coat, and 3 inch black stiletto heels. She takes her over-sized sunglasses off and with her perfectly manicured talons, slides them into her pocket. She’s like a fricking cross between Angelina Jolie in Salt and Charlize Theron in Atomic Blonde.

Richard refuses to acknowledge she’s there. We’re all sitting there playing eyeball ping pong, trying to figure out wtf is happening and why Richard isn’t saying anything or even looking at her. He’s talking about ghosts of the past and sorrows of regrets and wri— what the hell am I even talking about, we didn’t hear a fricking word he said! A few minutes go by with this awkwardness and she finally speaks.

“Richard,” she says. Even her voice sounds like it could cut deep in your soul and leave you hanging by your thumbs to let the blood drip out of your lifeless body. “We have to talk.”

“Ok, ok,” he goes, hands in the air, accepting defeat. “Lemme just split them into groups first.”

She’s staring daggers into him while he splits into small groups. like SMALL groups. As small as is possible for a class of 25. She calmly tells him that she’ll wait outside, and he stalls even more, talking about this theme or this cool thing he noticed, switching partners and mixing groups. She gets tired of this after a few minutes and comes back in, heel tapping, asking if he’s coming out this year. He’s trapped, so he goes outside.

Immediately everyone starts whispering and discussing, some trying to stick to the actual class material, too afraid to even wonder. I don’t even know what to say, so I just say sit there in shock while my partner texts away. Then I hear something funny...

“...pretty sure it’s just his friend.”

I turn around and look at the teacher’s pet. (And I mean this in the very best way. Teacher’s pets, especially in college, are the smartest fucking people. So much respect for all of them because the world may fucking know I can never be as good as them in studying and getting to know the teacher. Everyone should strive to be the teacher’s pet.) 👨‍🏫👩‍🏫🐶🐱🐰🐟

“What do you mean it’s just his friend?”

“Oh, I talk to Richard after class as much as I can. She comes like, every Friday, 10-15 minutes after class and takes him away, even if he’s with a student.”

I don’t know about y’all, but that sounds sorta sketch, especially after all the stories he told us.

He comes back after about 20 minutes, and he’s hustling. He’s still smiling, acting like nothing wrong, but we ain’t dumb.

“So guys, you’re all excused, but wait a few minutes before you leave. An emergency came up, but don’t worry. Your papers will be graded by Monday, but we’ll see what happens. Uh, you guys see that she’s waiting outside that door, so I’m just gonna go out THAT door. Remember, just come out a few minutes after.”

He’s throwing on his jacket, hat, and sunglasses as he’s saying this. He grabs his bag and scurries out the door, closing the door as quietly as possible. Through the window, we see him fast-walking away, but we don’t see the woman follow him. We sit a while, hearts pounding, before a girl announces she’s going home. We watch as she quietly opens the door, peeking outside. She flinches when she sees someone outside, but breathes a sigh of relief when it’s a student.  We all start filing out, quieter than usual, but a few whispers still lingering.

We all start to walk to the closest bus stop or the school quarry to grab a late breakfast, and we all slow down. On the side of the road, with a bunch of curious college students looking and talking around it, are three cop cars. In the middle car, is the woman. In the backseat. Handcuffed and locked up.

Holy. Crap. I can’t even make this up, y’all.

Richard is nowhere to be seen, and I run to the library and put it out of my mind. Girl has other finals to worry about.

The next day, we get an email from the professor saying:

“Dear students,

I am emailing you all to notify you that I will be conducting your class for the rest of the week. I will also be in touch with any other changes to the schedule.

Richard will continue to work with you all online for any questions you have for your essays and office hours. He will be be the one grading your final essay and be accessible by email. He should be in touch soon, but do not worry if he isn’t.

Those who were in class yesterday doubtless are aware an unusual situation occurred. I will explain to the extent of my ability tomorrow in class. Important things to remember are that Richard is not at fault for anything, he will still be your TA, and that you are all safe.

I will see you all in class.”

😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨

Like I said to my friends as soon as I read it, I felt safe until he said “you are all safe.” Famous last words of almost every guide in a horror movie.

Obviously I go to class the next day. We’re all sitting in a circle around the room, professor sitting at the very front. He takes roll calmly and makes a few jokes since he recognizes a few students. Then, he puts his papers down, sits down on the desk, and folds his hands together in front of him, addressing us in his calm, gentle, Shakespeare-learned voice.

“No doubt, you all have questions about the events that took place in your class yesterday. Unfortunately, it was a private matter, so I can only say that Richard and his family were experiencing some harassment and what you all witnessed was an individual being detained. I’d like to emphasize that you are all safe, and that Richard and his family are safe. We came to the agreement that I would conduct the remainder of his physical classes to prevent anymore interruptions and/or distractions. If any of you feel uncomfortable or unsafe, please speak with me after class so we may discuss some possible compromise.”

And so, the quarter ended. That was that. My TA did not come back to class and the mystery has not been solved. We can only guess what may or may not have occurred, but I definitely know something was weird. My grade is still TBD so please don’t ask 😭 but that is the tea about my mysterious TA.

I hope you all enjoyed, and you should come back next time for some more tea. I got some romance for the next one 😉💋

Thanks for reading! This was your Tea Master, peace! ❤✌

[ready-for-tea-time]

Mysterious Teacher’s Assistant (2/3)

Hello hello my luvs!! Y’all ready for tea time part 2?? The Mysterious TA continues! This ones a bit shorter, but still very fun.

We return to present day, another class, mid-quarter with Mr. Richard the Mystery Man. We’re chilling, waiting for him to come in. Tap, tap, tap, go the pencils to the desk. The clock’s ticking and striking fifteen till nine. He’s ten minutes late. I’m rolling my head, wondering why I picked an early morning class again when the door opens and my TA rushes in, answering my question for me.

“Sorry guys, had some stuff happen this morning. Just so you guys know, if you don’t see me tomorrow in lecture, I may have needed to run to Canada. So, if I do, consider your papers As. If I don’t, consider them As anyways because I’ll be so happy I don’t have to move to Canada.”

🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃Excuse me?🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃🙃

Well, Richard turns out to have lived in Colombia for a while with his family. They owned a small business like a mom and pop shop. They lived a nice, quiet life. Kids would come through on hot days, buy ice creams and sodas. Old men would come chat with his dad while picking up the daily paper. Students would wave hello as they ran home, the bell trilling behind them.

Well, the local gang came through and “bought” some stuff. Richard’s sister was not happy with that and called them out, demanding they pay up. They were not happy with that, especially coming from a strong, feisty woman like her. They laughed at first, but then she went ham on their asses. Woman took no shits.

So they went back to their hideout, tails between their legs, and started planning for their revenge. They sent a few guys to teach her a lesson, and unfortunately Richard’s family was part of the package, too.

They parked in front of of their house and sat outside waiting for the right moment. Richard and his sister see them and are like, crap. Richard is a smart boy though, so he calls up his friend for help. Remember Steve from part 1? So Steve is already in the army or military, so he brings over a couple of friends to the house and parks in the driveway next to their family car and goes inside. They all rush to switch clothes with each other; Richard, his mom, his dad, his sister. Then, when they’re all set, they all exit the house, heads down, and get into opposite cars. The two cars drive in opposite directions and the gang members follow the car heading to town. Meanwhile, Richard and his family drive towards the airport with nothing more than the clothes on their back.

Ending the story so he can start class, he tells us that all the papers are in order (Aka he’s not an illegal immigrant), but they’re living under a different name so it might be a bit mixed up, and the gang ended up being a lot bigger than he remembered, so if they found out where his family was, they would probably need to head out again.

Before anyone asks, he did not tell us which one he may or may not have needed to get away from present day. He also did show up to class the next day.

The story continues...

Thanks for your time, this was your Tea Master. Peace and love y’all! ✌❤

[ready-for-tea-time]

Mysterious Teacher’s Assistant (1/3)

I hope y’all are ready for a long one. This story gets crazier and crazier. I didn’t even believe it myself. Let’s get started.

So, my first day of classes, my TA introduces himself as Richard (not real name, obviously) and is like, let’s play 2 truths and a lie to break the ice. Okay, cool. He starts off and is like I’ve traveled here, I did this, and I shot my best friend in the stomach to save his life.

And of course the shooting the best friend is the truth and he moves on to the rest of the people. At the end of the class, he asks if there’s any questions. Me, being my overly curious self, of course have to ask him to elaborate on that story.

Sure, he says. And so the story starts...

He was a Navies man. He saw some bad things and survived worse. He came home and just had trouble adjusting to life again, so he decided to take a vacation to Cuba. 🌴😎🌴🛫🚤🌅 Gets to Cuba and starts roaming around, relaxing, doing his thing. He ends up bumping into this really cool dude and starts to talk to him. Let’s name him Bob. Say hi to Bob!

So Bob’s American, too! But he’s been in Cuba for a decade already. “Why did you stay in Cuba for so long?” Richard asks.

“Well Richard,” he says, leaning back in his creaky plastic sunbathing chair. “I came for vacation, but stayed for the sun and ladies.”

Jk he didn’t actually say that (I hope). He just fell in love with the people, the environment, and just everything about Cuba. So he convinces Richard to stay a bit longer and the weeks roll into months and the months roll into a few years. In that time, Richard gets a job with Bob’s business as a security head. Things are going good, he’s enjoying his time there and chilling when he suddenly gets a call from the US. It’s his old buddies from the Navy. They tell him there’s some things going down and the US actually sent a dude to go undercover to check out Bob’s business. Turns out, Bob wasn’t selling burgers if you know what I mean.

So they ask Richard to help the US pull their dude from the situation, and throw in some light threats as is the ‘Murica way. Richard is like I didn’t do shit so you can’t actually threaten me but yeah I’ll help.

Weeks go by and they give him some instruction on how it’s gonna work and they’re like, there’s gonna be a meeting, our boy’s gonna do his thing and you get him outta there. No biggie. Except...1) Their boy is Richard’s boy Steve. Steve and Richard are best friends from like childhood. Well now stakes are up. 2) Bob and friends know there’s a spy in their lines, they just don’t know who or where. Stakes are even higher. 3) Everyone has guns. 

Finally the day comes and Steve is facing off Bob with all of their buddies in a room. Richard sees Bob’s guys going for their belts, and not to fix them, and he sees Steve make eye contact with him, and he knows this is it. Richard screams at Steve like, “Look at this dipshit American spy, aw hell naw!” 

And then he pulls out his own gun. 

He takes aim at his best friend’s chest. 

He looks him straight in the eye. 

And before Steve, Steve’s boys, or even Bob’s boys could react, Richard fired the gun.

And his friend went down, like his legs had collapsed from beneath him, eyes rolling back as if he were trying to find the stars in the sky. And when he hit the floor, it was like the thunder and ground shaking of an oak tree being cut down. And then the chaos ensued. The yelling, the fighting, everything was a blur. In the end, no guns were drawn, everyone retreated to their escape cars, and Richard was left alone in the room with his best friend on the floor.

He goes over and stands over his friend’s lifeless body. He stares down at him with his hands in his pockets. He sighs softly and kicks his friend’s leg. “Yo, you gonna get up?”

His friend pops his eyes open and grins. He’s wearing a frickin bullet-proof vest.

Anyways, after that fiasco, Steve gets sent back to the US safely, Bob’s business is closed, and Richard finishes up his things to go back to the US, too.

Welp, thank you again for sitting through tea time with me. Tune in next week for part 2. This was your Tea Master. Peace out luvs! ✌❤

[ready-for-tea-time]

Package Thief

Okay, so, Amazon theft is not uncommon. I mean, delivery drivers have a schedule they gotta adhere to so they go to the stop, they drop, bang the door, and run. They don’t got time to make sure you answer the door or that they hide the package for you. Today’s society is too fast for that. So if someone sees a nice lil Amazon package, they’re gonna be like, “shit, I want stuff. I wonder what stuff they got.” Easy pickings. I get it. Not cool, but I get it.

Anyways, I usually don’t have this problem cause, number one, my apartment’s upstairs. You have to make some real ass effort to get up there to steal a measly package. Number two, my apartment is behind a huge hedge, so even if they were willing to go all the way up the stairs to get it, they have to be able to see the crap first. Sometimes I don’t even see the door until I make my way to the bottom of the stairs. And number three, I don’t buy much. Broke people problems.

HOWEVER, I happened to be buying a few things these last few days because Black Friday sales, of course, but also my friends and I decided to sponsor a low-income family for the holidays. ❤ Nothing says the true meaning of Christmas like giving to those who don’t have life as good as you are lucky to have. Well, I’m in charge of getting a baby blanket and the plastic bins we’ll use to put the other gifts in. I’m ready for this. I wanted to get these earbuds on sale anyways. So I go buy the earbuds and blanket first, and then I spend $40 on a pack of 6 plastic bins.

Let’s hit pause for a second. First off, when the blanket did come in, it was fucking tiny. It was way smaller than what I thought and what they had pictured. Like, Amazon, really. Luckily, It’s a baby blanket, so I can be like, I got it like that on purpose, but seriously. Second, why the actual fucking hell are plastic bins $40?!?! and those were the cheap ones! But, chilling out, it’s for a good cause. Back to the story.

So the blanket and earbuds come in, no biggie (sort of 😒), so my boxes are supposed to come in the day after. Chill. Well, I forget about it cause so much stuff has happened and then the day after, I’m like, oh yeah, my bins. I check my account.

“DELIVERED YESTERDAY.” 

I did not receive a package. For sure, I did not get anything. I was home all day. And like, a box full of boxes is not small. I can’t just “miss it.” So I’m like, okay, let’s just call the house real quick. I text my housemates, T and S. T’s home, so I ask if he can check outside for me real quick. Gets back and is like, nope not there. S chirps in and is like, you check downstairs? Yup, it’s not there either. So I’m pissed now, cause the options are, A) never actually delivered, and B) stolen. My packages have never been more than a day late before. And even when it is, it does not show “DELIVERED” on my account before it’s actually delivered. So I know it’s been fucking snatched like a hot piece of ass.

So of course I call Amazon and go through the whole BS of “well, it says it was delivered”, “Well, I didn’t get it” and I’m livid. Of course you don’t steal a package with earbuds and a blanket in it. You steal the one with boxes to hold the actual fricking gifts. Like, what is that crap? I’m so livid and petty, I turn to my friend and am like, yo, I’m gonna post this on that one page with all the students, cause it’s likely someone our age or they’ll know who. Do it, she says. And do it I did.

So I go, “To the asshole who stole my package yesterday, I hope you're happy with yourself when you find out that big box was full of other boxes. And to add onto that, those bins are supposed to be gift boxes for low income families. Your life has resorted to stealing a box full of boxes that were supposed to be for charity. I hope you're happy with yourself. 🤬👎”

Of course I tag my friend in it too, and she’s like, lowkey funny. And I think to myself, yeah, it kinda is. And I look at my post, and imagine their faces when they open the box, like, “Ohhh what did I get??”

Boxes, bitch. You got BOXES.

Anyways, status is an instant fucking hit; people are feeling for me, livid at the nerve, especially since it’s for charity. One guy calls out his friend and he’s like WASN’T ME (Boo, even if this one wasn’t you, rethink your life, plz). But it’s getting around. I’m content; even if someone took the boxes, Amazon sending a replacement, people are laughing at my boxes bitch comment, life goes on. I get home and what do I fucking find at the bottom of my stairs?

The neighborhood cat, Mushin!! ❤🐱❤ 

LOL, I kid, I kid...Mushin was standing next to a huge ass box. A huge ass box that’s cut open. A huge ass box that’s cut open with Amazon Prime tape. A huge ass box, that’s been cut open, with Amazon Prime tape, and my fucking name on the top. So I bring it inside. Pull it open, and lo and behold, it’s the fucking boxes. The asshole was actually on the Facebook page and felt guilty. And if not, he (or she) saw it was some boxes and was like fuck that crap and gave it back. Oh well, whatever. I got what I needed, don’t care that much.

Anyways, that’s my tea for today. Thank you for coming to tea time. This was your Tea Master. Gnite luvs ✌❤

[ready-for-tea-time]

I hope y’all be ready for tea time!

Do you like to spill that hot, hot tea? Those juicy tidbits and story times that no one can quite believe? This is gonna be fun times for you to read and for me to write. It’s tea time!