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Panic at the Disco at Abbey Road, 2008.

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things are shaping up to be pretty odd

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how do u feel about folie à deux

when folie à deux first came out, i hated it. i listened to it once and then put it down for a year. i was so disappointed. where was grand theft autumn/where is your boy? where was xo? where was hum hallelujah? i wanted more “long live the car crash hearts” and less “i will never believe in anything again”. i wanted more “i’m good to go and i’m going no where fast” and less “nobody wants to hear you sing about tragedy.” i wanted fall out boy to validate my loneliness like they used to when no one else would. i wanted the celebration of what i was and i wanted hope. they said it would be less autobiographical, but i couldn’t help but be upset. 

i picked up the cd again around the time i came out as queer in my conservative christian high school. while i don’t believe my gender or sexuality are sins, i know a lot of folks i went to school with and who taught me definitely thought so. suddenly, “i don’t care just what you think as long as it’s about me” and “i must confess i’m in love with my own sins” became armor instead of things to be ashamed of. my own subtle narcissism helped me make it out. 

in light of that, i started looking at the album differently. if it wasn’t meant to be a gotta get out of this town album, then i couldn’t hold it to those expectations. i began to appreciate the songs as tiny isolated stories, more like persona poems than normal pete wentz lyrics. they became a lot more enjoyable then and really showed a variety of expression from a band that already was developing as a forerunner of the pop punk/pop rock/emo pop era. it was a risky choice because it wasn’t what the fans were expecting, but that doesn’t make it any less brilliant. 

of course, i have to address “what a catch, donnie” because it holds a very special place in my heart. even when i didn’t like the album as a whole, i knew there was something about this song. i was immediately draw in by patrick’s vocal dexterity and the lyrics, but every single time i hear this song i always always always cry when they start to overlay the songs at the end. it felt like a goodbye and it felt delicate, and after the hiatus was announced i listened to it over and over again. i still think it’s a beautiful piece and it really means a lot to me. 

i can’t say i connect to folie à deux as a cohesive piece of emotional work like i did with the other albums because that’s not what it’s meant to be. it’s not a lyrical stop on pete wentz’s life journey like TTTYG or FUTCT, but it displays flexibility of voice and form, which is something that lots of other bands struggle with. the album also explores different genres musically and puts a new spin on types of music that don’t usually intersect with pop punk (like the bluesy end of w.a.m.s.). knowing that fall out boy can write from a variety of places and points of view is really comforting and makes me even more proud of them. 

tl;dr folie à deux gives me a lot of complicated feelings and at first i was upset that it wasn’t a sad i hate my hometown album, but then i realized that it wasn’t meant to be and that it actually expertly navigates different points of view and has a lot of lyrical and musical breadth. 

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this is Ryden Lore™

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some ryden revival on today’s anniversary

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|this is a golden video|

[7-12-18]

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Panic! At The Disco- Cabin Songs

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Ryan Ross → Live in Denver DVD

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Ryan Ross + Glasses

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+

I know it’s 2018 but I still love ryden. Like I eat that shit up. The thought of ryden being together? Really keeps me going. I love it.

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this reminds me of throam brendon

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:)))

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Just excited crotch of Ryan.... *look at the bottom right corner*

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peep the capri suns

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Black & White Ryden mood board requested by anonymous