pythagoreanwhump

[pythagoreanwhump]

when the objectively bad person has traumatic and honestly reasonable reasons for why theyre like that but it doesnt excuse their actions and only serves to make them more tragic as a character

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that tank of copium you've been breathing from? nothing but air. that's right, it was all down to you believing in yourself

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psst. guys did you hear. they made up a new game that everyone you know suddenly got really really into in the span of a day and you never heard anything at all about it prior

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They should hide a secret layer of yummy taste under all the nasty taste on Nintendo switch cartridges to reward the children whose hearts are most devoted and true

[pythagoreanwhump]

Tropes that always give me whumperflies

Content: noncon nudity, manhandling, injuries, beating, fear, defiant/stoic whumpee

Throwing whumpee onto their knees before the enemy leader and holding them there by the back of the neck

Whumpee half-curled into a fetal position as they're being relentlessly kicked

Whumpee forced to strip. And doing so flushing and getting ashamed.

Whumpee shuddering and shaking from exhaustion caused by screaming, resisting, and fear

Wiping blood off hastily, grabbing injuries, making faces as they try not to cry

Ripping their pants down or shirt up so roughly it jerks whumpee's body

The broken sob that's kind of the end of a cry they barely managed to hold in

Whumpee feeling stupid, humiliated, even though anyone would, in their position

Sweating, swallowing, and keeping their face under control, trembling as they are inspected

Being twisted by the wrist, spun around, and slammed face-first into a wall or desk

Compromising positions like whumper sitting on their butt, in a non-sexual, violent way that just emphasizes the desperate physical struggle.

Grabbing them by the face to look at them and make snide observations about how scared they are

Slapping whumpee in the cheek

Small whumpees being thrown around and restrained physically by big whumpers

Grabbing their hair to slam them into the wall and whispering something in their ear that makes whumpee grimace

"turn around and face the wall."

Slapping a knife wound or gunshot injury and whumpee winces, cries and curls over the injury

A sarcastic remark dying on whumpee's lips as they see what whumper brought to beat them with

A stoic whumpee after a long time of taking a beating with only grunts of pain, groaning as a bone is broken, and as whumper raises their boot to kick again, whumpee hoarsely cries "wait wait, please! --please wait!"

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[pythagoreanwhump]

love when dogs come back to you with seeds stuck to them. lmao get used as dispersal idiot. that’s just what you get for snuffling the grasses

[pythagoreanwhump]

Manhandle your whumpees.

Grab them by the arm and twist until something burns and crunches. Shove them down into their knees and rub their faces into the hard ground until their cheeks bruise or their lips bleed or their noses break. Slam them into walls. Grab them by the collar and shake them hard. Throw them around. Hold them by the throat to get their attention. Grab them hard enough to leave finger marks just because you can.

Leave your whumpees with bruises and aches that will linger long after the abuse has stopped.

[pythagoreanwhump]

[pythagoreanwhump]

Followed you for whump and stayed for various day making whimsy fun posts 🙂‍↕️

Thank you thank you (˶‾᷄ ⁻̫ ‾᷅˵)

[pythagoreanwhump]

Masterlist

Grab your character and shove their head underwater. Keep them pinned until they breathe in the water. Pull them up and let them splutter and cough. Push them under again. Pull them up. Let them use their precious seconds of air to beg. "Ple-Please, please stop — " Push them under again. Feel them squirm. Pull them up sooner; they couldn't hold their breath long enough. Once more for good measure. Don't let them up until they nearly suffocate. Pull them up and throw them to the ground, let them cough up all the water they swallowed. Pull them into your lap. They are shivering, the cold water having seeped deep into their bones. They are crying. They are going to try to pull away. Don't let them. Hush them gently. Card through their hair. Let them relax under your hands. Then drag them back over to the water. Put their nose right above the surface and keep their head right there. Let them imagine how it will feel to be pushed under again, held there, pulled up just so they can drown again. They will fight, they will sob, they will plead and barter and yell. They will be scared. Answer them with an order. "Take a deep breath for me." Watch them struggle to decide if they should. They probably won't be able to take one deep enough if they tried. Push them under. Watch them squirm. Repeat.

[pythagoreanwhump]

[BAD POST]

[pythagoreanwhump]

Rich people have a million little ways to trick and trap you. Take forks, for instance. To us, just a thing you stab your food with. Only need one kind. No. If you eat at a fancy country club, maybe with the Queen of some even fancier-pants country, you need to know which fork is specifically for salad. As soon as you break that contract, they know you're just pretending to be one of them. The mockery will begin, and nobody – I mean nobody – will invest in your dirigible business, not even if you call it a zeppelin to take advantage the recent inexplicable interest in the German language.

There's a solution, of course. You can send yourself to finishing school, which – despite the name – does not have any happy endings. Medium-fancy people will teach you the ways and means of the extremely-fancy people, and by doing so you will be able to worm your way into the bourgeoisie and destroy it from the inside. I mean, get funding for your great product idea. What you need to look out for here is the subtle brainwashing.

We have a tendency, as a species, to assume that everyone else knows the same things you do. Now, when a person on the subway doesn't know what fork to use to eat the rat they just caught, you'll judge them, despite not knowing this very information five fucking minutes ago when you paid Fancy Nancy to teach you about it. That person on the subway is your fellow human being, moreso than the baby-rich that you are trying to ingratiate yourself with. Do not take them for granted. You can easily find yourself fighting against a person who is more like yourself than different, breaking up the working-class camaraderie of the proles in a bullshit attempt to curry favour with the guy who won't even buy 2% of your blimp business, I mean come on dude, we can get tourists on this thing and soak them!

No. As soon as you know a way to pretend to be rich, it is your solemn duty to tell everyone else around you this same way. Get as many regular folks up the ladder and into the country club to steal their silverware as possible. And I'll help you right now with a rich people secret of my very own: golf is actually really boring. They just do it so they have a nice place to gossip about the other golfers. Now if you distract them while I steal the batteries out of their golf carts, we can get like two or three bucks from the scrapper. Then I can buy some helium tanks for my business. No, of course you'll get a free ride. Solidarity, friend.

[pythagoreanwhump]

think i need to lay on the floor for a few hours. maybe days. we'll see where it goes

[pythagoreanwhump]

ur government assigned gender for the day is the first thing u get when u click this link to a randomised wikipedia article. NO REROLLS . i am the  trollsteineggje mountain in norway

[pythagoreanwhump]

corn mazes were invented WHEN???

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kids these days just want to be on phone. NO ONE is dying at my antarctic research station