pushovermediacritic

[pushovermediacritic]

The Land Before Time Live-blog Announcement and Preamble

I love dinosaurs. When I was a little Autistic child, I REALLY loved dinosaurs, and The Land Before Time movies were a big part of that, as far as early childhood goes.

In my later childhood, I moved on to the Jurassic Park movies. So I could live-blog those movies instead, but everyone has already said everything about the Jurassic Park movies. They're some of the most discussed movies in existence, especially with the Jurassic World sequels keeping them relevant. Nowadays, I still love dinosaurs, but not as much as before. I still get excited when I see dinosaur news, and I'm really enjoying a manga called Dinosaur Sanctuary (basically "what if Jurassic Park wasn't a disaster"). But I'm not quite as passionate as I used to be.

Anyway, I haven't seen The Land Before Time movies since I was a kid. I used to love them and I watched most of them. But the most anyone talks about them nowadays is that the first one is great in the context of Don Bluth's resume, and the rest are better left forgotten.

Personally, I don't think that's entirely fair. Or maybe it is, I dunno, it's been years since I've seen them. The franchise definitely got a lot more sanitized and bland as it went on, but I still remember some of the earlier sequels being decent-to-good.

I remember that I even preferred the brighter animation style of the sequels to that of the first one, though I'm pretty sure that's just because I watched them as VHSs on a shitty CRT TV and I was sitting so close to the screen I could feel the static on my nose because I hadn't yet been diagnosed with nearsightedness and didn't have glasses. So I fully expect that opinion to change.

And I haven't seen all the movies, maybe there's some hidden gems in the later ones. Though I do remember checking out some of those later ones and thinking they sucked, so they might at least be fun roast material. All that sums up to this being a franchise I have a ton of nostalgia for, but that's basically it. Just nostalgia. Not a lot of detailed praise/critiques/analysis. I feel like the franchise deserves a re-visit to see if it's as good/bad as I remember, and see if my small stupid child brain missed any interesting characterization or themes.

Did you know the latest Land Before Time movie came out in 2016? Apparently, they tried briefly reviving the franchise after a 9-year hiatus, because the last one before that was in 2007.

Anyway, the plan here is to, on my own time, watch through all 14 Land Before Time movies (not the tv show, I already tried that and it was painful) and live-blog my thoughts on them with screencaps. I will also give them each a rating between 1 and 10, 5 being average.

[pushovermediacritic]

My thought was that thing in Animorphs where every life is represented by a strand of energy and the strands coil around each other to represent relationships and then the strands turn dark and end when someone dies.

Like the burnt end of a candle wick.

When you first heard the phrase "shuffled off this mortal coil," what did you think the word "coil" was referring to? Wondering if I was the only one who misunderstood it.

The world

One's own body

Something else

I honestly have no idea

[pushovermediacritic]

[pushovermediacritic]

I can't find a clip of it (since I think it's from over 10 years ago), but my all-time favorite Stephen Colbert quote is this:

Colbert: "Scientology. Is it a legitimate religion, like Mormanism? Or is it a creepy cult, like Mormanism 15 years ago?"

I might have misremembered some details like exact phrasing or the year number, but that quote always stuck in my head. Both for how it calls out Scientology for being a creepy cult and for calling out Mormanism for being a creepy cult that was only recently normalized.

If someone can find the clip from the Colbert Report, I'd appreciate it.

[pushovermediacritic]

Shonen fanbases: Due to the lack of development for the female characters in the show, pretty much every ship we have is mlm. Not our fault the actual romance you forcefully added is dull and lifeless unlike the dynamics between your fully developed male characters.

Dandadan fanbase: MOMOKARUN! GIRLBOSS X MALEWIFE! YIPPEEEEE

[pushovermediacritic]

daylight savings is actually truly one of the most evil things in the world. just casually forcing us to confront the fact that time is fake while torturing insomniacs, autistics and schoolchildren across the globe. when will the agony end

[pushovermediacritic]

[pushovermediacritic]

Read the manga Dinosaur Sanctuary.

Somehow they make a real life Jurassic Park and you won tickets to go. Even though it's potentially dangerous, do you go?

Yes

No

Depends

[pushovermediacritic]

[pushovermediacritic]

That's why Robin and Franky were wondering if he was even planning to return to the Straw Hats after the timeskip.

I suspect that Oda knew Brook didn't get enough focus before the timeskip, so that's why he placed extra focus on him in Return to Sabaody, Fishman Island, and Punk Hazard.

And I think that extra focus went over a lot of people's heads.

This is a good and iconic panel, but I just realized Luffy is barefoot, and going back and looking at it, he has been the entire chapter

[pushovermediacritic]

You mean Star Wars. Like, maybe there's some Nausicaa inspiration there, but the final battle of Mortal Engines is literally a beat-for-beat rip-off of Star Wars.

[pushovermediacritic]

Pitch for a Simpsons Episode

It's based entirely around following up on this scene:

The episode begins with Homer, Bart, and Lisa sitting around on the couch watching TV.

Kent Brockman: "Our latest story, someone takes a cocktail into a bar. A molotov cocktail that is! That's right, last night, someone firebombed the local lesbian bar, the She She Lounge-"

Homer: "I recognize that place!"

Kent goes on to elaborate that, miraculously, there were no fatalities because the She She Lounge recently underwent some renovations to install a fire exit.

One of the patrons is interviewed and she comments that the renovations were because an anonymous older trans butch was there one day and complained about it. She says that woman, wherever she is now, is a hero.

The A-Plot: Patty was present in the She She Lounge when it was attacked, and it was terrifying. Patty and Marge team up to track down the person who firebombed the bar, trying to figure out who they are, why they did it, and how they knew the bar would be vulnerable to fire.

The B-Plot: Homer lets it slip that he's the "older trans butch" who complained about the lack of fire escape, and he becomes a hero in the eyes of Springfield's queer community. Homer needs to dress in drag to keep up the facade of being trans to avoid disappointing everyone.

The two plots converge on the climax where the firebomber attempts to attack the queer pride parade that Homer is the centerpiece of, as a hero. Patty and Marge take down the firebomber, and then they confront Homer. Homer reveals himself to be cis, though he has discovered a newfound respect for the queer community through this experience.

The queers at the parade are mostly fine with Homer lying since he's still an ally and a hero for saving lives (they're mostly just confused why he was at the lesbian bar in the first place), and then Patty takes his place in the parade as a new hero for stopping the firebomber the second time.

[pushovermediacritic]

Two, pronounced "Fie-yer".

Poll: Is the word Fire one or two syllables?

1

2

3 or more??????

[pushovermediacritic]

hey im the normal little voice in ur ear telling u that its ok to start watching one piece !! its ok to start watching one piece! its ok to start watching one piece... its ok. start watching one piece start watching one piece start watching one piece start watching one piece watch one piece

[pushovermediacritic]

Anyone who has ever worked for a company that was bought out by PE firms knows just how disastrous it is.  

[pushovermediacritic]

Regular reminder to read/watch Mashle: Magic and Muscles instead of Harry Potter. If you feel nostalgia for HP, I promise that Mashle can fill that hole.

Mashle isn't written by a raging bigot. It's not perfect, the author has some issues with both quality and quantity of representation, but he does a damn better job than Rowling did.

Mashle actually includes several canonically queer characters in major roles, like the main rival character of season 2 is canonically non-binary, and the Snape analogue of the series is canonically aroace.

And as far as dark-skinned characters, Mashle has three of them. One a student from a rival school, one a high-ranking member of the government, and one an escaped death-row criminal (in a group with 5 other white death-row criminals).

Mashle is satire of HP. The story harshly criticizes the world and themes of HP, and it actually commits to the idea of changing a bigoted magic society for the better.

(Obvious blanket fuck harry potter disclaimer)

I’m white so obviously take what I have to say with a grain of salt but it does set off some alarm bells for me to be casting a Black man to play a character who is:

* Repeatedly described in the text as extremely ugly

* In part defined by an unrequited romantic and sexual obsession with the (white) protagonist’s mother

* Textually a former member of a racial supremacist organization, only defecting after the death of aforementioned white woman

Also who has a backstory where he gets tormented and bullied by a group of white kids, including being hung upside down (!!!), which I cannot possibly imagine they will handle at all tactfully given the massive change in connotation this casting brings

[pushovermediacritic]

Vent art