planningwithlupus-blog

[planningwithlupus-blog]

Downhill Battle

Today is day 3 of my fight with my kidneys. My Lupus is getting the best of me. We lost our medical insurance due to a glitch during open enrollment at my husbands work and now I'm doing without ALL medication. They refuse to help us or fix it. Yes, this is a nightmare. In the past few days my Lupus has decided to attack my kidneys progressively and it's not playing around. I have been in constant pain and unable to pee. I was given a Flomax to take to help urinate but still no luck. I'm starting to swell now and my left ankle is swelling. I'm not sure how long this can continue. Without insurance I am unable to see my doctors or anything. I'm so lost. I guess my next step is to go to the ER for help. I'm not sure what else to do at this point. When the pain gets too unbearable I will figure out something. I'm so sick of being sick. I know my family is sick of me being sick. My husband is beyond sick of me being sick. I'm so unhappy and getting more and more depressed each day. When will this ever end? I don't know if we will ever have insurance again. All I know is that we can't afford to go out and pay the $500 to get private insurance. I hate Lupus. I hate my kidneys. I don't understand why my body is fighting against me. Why is everything against me??!!

[planningwithlupus-blog]

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[planningwithlupus-blog]

No Sleep

As of now it is 1:08 am. My husband is still at work and my babies are asleep. As a peaceful calm washes over me and I start to relax, the running mind syndrome begins. The wheels begin to turn in my brain and it all begins. No sleep for me. I think of everything, things that don't even matter. This is my curse. Then I begin to think about my pain. My neck is beginning to hurt and oh my muscles are so achy!! How can I relieve the pain? How can I ease my body enough for sleep? I wish my husband was here to calm me and hold me until I finally give in and pass out. I've learned that the strange thing about Lupus is that it will attack the stupidest places. For example, my left ankle has been swelling and bothering me. My legs kill me, especially the backs of my legs. But I must stop thinking and I must try to rest because my husband will be home soon to comfort me and I have a very busy day tomorrow. I must try to sleep!!

[planningwithlupus-blog]

Another set of stickers that I just purchased from PeanutButterTaco on Etsy. Also a magnificent shop! Truly love these stickers!

[planningwithlupus-blog]

I just made a considerably large order from TwoKraftyChicks on Etsy. Great Shop and amazing stickers! I was on the phone with my dad earlier and got to talking about how I am out of planner stickers so he felt sorry for me I guess and got me a giftcard. My husband can’t know about it though lol. I also made an order from PeanutButterTaco !!

[planningwithlupus-blog]

*Not my photo So I am thinking about buying the Carpe Diem A5 planner to put my Eclp in. I really want to try a ring bound planner for a little bit but can't afford the ones I really want like Kikki k or Kate Spade. The color crush by WP and the Carpe Diem are both very nice and reasonable on pricing though. I just need to make up my mind.

[planningwithlupus-blog]

A Bad Day

Today started out okay but then progressively got worse. My depression is really ruling my day and I wish I could stop it. Stress, money problems, emotions, pain, and too many other factors to list. Overall it is just a bad day. No swelling today but I am hurting all over. The depression and anxiety bothers me the most. I sit here and think about how money could solve most of my problems but that is not true. Yes, it could help with medical copays, rent, groceries, and buying the kids their winter clothes but it won't heal me. Would it lessen my depression? Maybe. But the pain from the Lupus would still be here. Money can't solve everything but it could solve most of my problems. I need to get out my planner and add all the new doctor appointments but my depression isn't allowing it. I'm not in the mood to plan today. There are so many things I want to do but I just don't have the energy. I need to do the laundry but I'm thinking of ways to hold it off yet another day. Days like these make me truly miserable. Everything makes me unhappy and being home alone with 2 kids doesn't help. Nobody to talk to when my husband is working, nobody to open up to, and nobody to share my pain with. A hug would be great. Today is just a bad day. I pray tomorrow will be better.

[planningwithlupus-blog]

I made the group Planning With Lupus mostly for people in the planner community that have Lupus. But you can join if you are just a supporter also! I made the group as a safe place to share my hobby and interests with others that have the same disease as me. I hope you all join it!

[planningwithlupus-blog]

This cover on my rose gold horizontal eclp couldn't be more perfect after my lupus diagnosis.

[planningwithlupus-blog]

What I've Learned About My Disease

Since my diagnosis of Systemic Lupus I have talked to several amazing women and got different opinions and tips. I've learned so much this week! Lupus typically affects women and is an incurable disease. It can be treated with multiple different medications including Chemotherapy. Finding the right treatment plan is not easy!! Lupus is an autoimmune disease and Systemic Lupus can affect all of your organs. At the moment, my kidneys, brain, and joints are being attacked. I have severe kidney issues, severe migraines, joint swelling, joint inflammation, hair loss, memory loss, brusing, severe anemia, pain, and multiple other issues. All of this because of one disease. Crazy huh? Lupus may not sound too bad but it is a terrible disease to have. Like cancer it is incurable and hard to treat. Every person is different and requires different treatment. I get to see a Nephrologist next week to start a more permanent treatment plan and I hope to learn more then. I'm excited in hopes that I may be healthy again someday. I will be a fighter and I won't let the disease take my life over! Wish me the best of luck! :)

[planningwithlupus-blog]

Weekly horizontal eclp layout :) I really love planning! This week is my baby girl’s birthday and I’m so excited!! She will be 2!

[planningwithlupus-blog]

Fight Lupus!! #LupusAwareness

[planningwithlupus-blog]

About Me

Since this is my first blog I would like to do a small intro on myself. My name is Kayla and I am a 27 yr. old happily married mother of 2. I have a 2 yr. old daughter and a 4 yr. old son. I also have 2 step daughters ages 5 and 9. I am currently in nursing school and dream of being a RN soon. I live in a very small town in West Tennessee. My most favorite hobbies at the moment include glam planning, journaling, crafting, memory journaling, scrapbooking, reading, and writing. I started glam planning a couple years ago to help with my short term memory loss. Planning and keeping everything in a paper planner keeps me organized and helps me keep up with daily tasks. I absolutely love planning! I love the planner community and I’ve made multiple friends along the way, some that I even call family. I currently own the Erin Condren Rose Gold horizontal Lifeplanner, the vertical Erin Condren Lifeplanner, and the Mambi Happy planner. I love washi and all things planning related including pens, stickers, and adorable stuff! I was just recently diagnosed with Systemic Lupus which is incurable and can be treated multiple ways including chemo. I hope to find the right treatment plan for me! Lupus is currently attacking my kidneys, joints, and brain. I have bad days and some good days. Every day is different and I never know how I will feel. This is one of the reasons I started my blog. I want to meet other women in the planning community with Lupus like me so we can learn from one another and support each other. I will also be using my blog to do reviews on planner items such as stickers bought from etsy shops. I hope you love to read my daily posts and I hope my blog can help someone! Enjoy and thank you for reading!