pins-needles

[pins-needles]

[pins-needles]

there was a time

when i was a kid i kept on falling

skinning the same knee over and over again

it took a while to heal

now that im older i try to understand

these invisible bruises in my chest

hurt more than a repeating wound

your words in my head

speak louder than my nerves alerting pain

alarms silenced by your ignorance

[pins-needles]

[pins-needles]

[pins-needles]

[pins-needles]

cut my heart into pieces

youll never find my soul

its not with my body

not in that hole

ill never leave you darling

dont throw away my love

hoping you can save me

angel from above

[pins-needles]

buried in my isolation

reaching from below

trying to grasp anything i can

please don't let me go

you let me fall

into my sorrow

drowning hearts cry out

for just one answer

with collapsing lungs

my breaking voice

i scream because i have no chioce

begging softly on my knees

if you couldn't hear me then

will you ever?

[pins-needles]

[pins-needles]

[pins-needles]

begging to set myself free

but i wont ever leave

not by my own hand

which breaks me even more

ive been so good just for you

to be proud of me

alas, it is not enough

it will never be

[pins-needles]

as everlasting streams of sorrow spill

from my brain to my heart

its turned into love

an on going cycle

i have so much to give

provide the hurt

and my love will forever flow

it will never dry

dry up like my bones

maybe six feet under

i can build a home

but for now

i stay a network

a channel for your hurt

believe and start again

we can be perfect

your little loves rebirth

[pins-needles]

no one to cry to

or wipe my tears

im always alone

alone with all my fears

ill cry into the sweater

that which is my own

picturing you in it

telling me im home

hopefully one day

you'll finally see

who i truly am

and what i can be

then i can be happy

deep down inside

knowing that you love me

please swallow your pride

[pins-needles]

cyanide seeds you planted

feed on small traces of love

indistinguishable from hate

the poison you hoped would help me grow

deep roots are in my heart

i can feel them under my skin

weathered and faded

where do they begin

time buried love

deeper than your faith

excavate whats left of us

until there is no pain

[pins-needles]

take advantage of my empathy

to feel better about the pain you hold

how does it feel to know

that the cause of my death

was suffocating in your hurt

buried with my thoughts

desperately begging for silence

[pins-needles]

in my private gallery

we stand around blankly

staring at the walls

instead of you

these thorns between us

catch my fall

the pulp that was a heart

still pistons

blood through my body

untouched yet irreparable

ill try my best to piece it back together

[pins-needles]

please don’t pray

i always stay

even when you hurt me

i wanna make you cry

take it all away

are you gonna let me?

let me in your house

back in my bed

let me hold my family

let me be who i am

but you only see

what you want us to be

[pins-needles]

we could be perfect and everlasting!

but theres no room in your head

and if i had the guts

i would spill them all out

shadows and sorrows is what love is

I lie and cry after it

you know who you hate

and wish it could be me

the fire's between us

and theres nowhere to run