phaseoluslunatic

[phaseoluslunatic]

I dunno man. I found out today that a subway sandwich is $14 now. A shitty subway footlong sandwich that isn't actually 12 inches long and is occasionally made with expired ingredients and was never a great option to start with. I ate those in high school because I was broke and at the mall a lot.

There are poke bowls in my city from a local place for $16. Super fresh fish and veg, warm rice, more than I can eat in one sitting, for the price of a sandwich and a drink at america's most mid-tier sandwich shop.

Someone in another post said (paraphrased) you used to be able to get something mediocre for cheap, but now the mediocre things cost as much as the nice things so why would you?

[phaseoluslunatic]

Chai tea bag + lil but of brown sugar + apple cider packet + 16 oz. mug of hot but not quite boiling water

it will not Fix You but like. maybe. maybe.

[phaseoluslunatic]

Okay, hear me out: I know that cabbage salad doesn't sound very exciting. But this stuff is amazing, and I ate this entire pint container of it for lunch on Friday. It's even better the second day, imho.

It's based on Molly Wizenberg's recipe for red cabbage salad from her beautiful book A Homemade Life. I've made it dozens of times, and over the years I've made some of my own modifications to it according to my palate. I think it's really lovely and nearly perfect like this because it has a lot of great notes: crunch, brightness, saltiness, nuttiness, richness, cheesiness.

Here's how I make it (and I actually kinda prefer regular green/white cabbage for this):

Cabbage Salad

2 tbsp olive oil

2 tbsp lemon juice

1 small clove garlic, smashed (or minced into a paste with salt)

small head of green cabbage (about 1.5 lbs), finely shredded

1/2 cup shredded Romano (or Parmesan or Pecorino-Romano) cheese

1/3 cup sliced Castelvetrano olives

1/4 cup toasted pine nuts

lots of freshly ground black pepper

Mix together olive oil, lemon juice, and smashed garlic clove in a jar. I sometimes puree the garlic clove into the dressing, and sometimes (like now, when my gut is being a little cranky) I just let it infuse the dressing for a few hours and then fish it out. That part is up to you.

Season dressing with salt and pepper. Let it sit for a couple of hours, stirring occasionally with a fork and smashing the garlic clove against the side of the jar, to let the garlic really flavor the dressing.

In a large bowl, toss together the remaining ingredients, then add dressing and toss again, adding salt, pepper, olive oil, or lemon juice to taste.

[phaseoluslunatic]

i love u tzatziki i love u pita i love u olive oil i love u foccacia i love u hummus i love u flat bread

[phaseoluslunatic]

*sorry the second from the last option should be "but I don't know what they are"

if you HAVE encountered them in real life I would love to know when and where. personally I have not but I have seen them mentioned in print media of a certain era as the established joke thing you sneak drinks of when you're young and unaccustomed to alcohol. I feel like they were maybe big in the seventies?

[phaseoluslunatic]

I attended a Dungeon Meshi themed dinner last weekend and wanted to share what was brought/devoured! Enjoy the comparison of what the dishes looked like irl vs the show

[phaseoluslunatic]

My canonical The Beans recipe for the convenience of linking to people

Original recipe is here: https://www.wearesovegan.com/creamy-miso-coconut-butter-beans but the modified version in this post is betterrrr:

Ingredience:

olive oil

1 onion, peeled + sliced

1 can of cannellini beans*

1 can of chickpeas*

1 can of full-fat coconut milk

2 tbsp white miso paste

salt + pepper

100g (3.5oz) baby spinach

1 handful of fresh dill or parsley (I usually use parsley; The Beans are still delicious even with dried herbs, but use less)

1/2 lemon, juice only

some tasty fresh fuckin BREAD

*When I make a double batch (and I always make a double batch, you should too at least if you're cooking for a group) I do 3 cans cannellini beans and 1 can chickpeas-- I think this is the ideal ratio but it's not very practical to do in a single batch

Steps:

Drizzle a splash of olive oil in a large pan or pot on a low-medium heat. Next add the onion and cook for 6-8 minutes or until the onion turns translucent (you don’t want to brown the onion).

Add the beans - including all the juices from the tins - into the pan. Then turn the heat up and cook for 5-8 minutes or until some of the liquid has reduced. While you're waiting, here's some prep you can do in anticipation of later steps: A. Put the miso paste into a small bowl and ladle a bit of the hot liquid in. Stir it around to dissolve. (This saves you from intractable undissolved miso clumps in the final product later) B. Chop the herbs if you got herbs that need to be chopped

Pour in the coconut milk. (You can reserve a few dollops of the cream for topping later if you want to be fancy, but I never bother).

Stir in the miso paste (dissolve it first if you haven't already!) and a generous pinch of pepper, then cook for a minute. Go a bit longer if the broth seems too runny, but it's probably fine.

Stir in the spinach and cook for another minute until it has wilted.

Chop most of the dill/parsley if you didn't already (save a few leaves for topping later if you want to be fancy) then add the chopped dill into the pan along with the lemon juice.

Give everything a good stir, then taste the sauce and season with salt and more pepper, if necessary.

Remove the pan from the heat (and if you chose the Fancy Life, top with the remaining dill leaves, a splash of olive oil, freshly ground black pepper and dollops of the remaining coconut cream.)

Serve with toasted bread for dunking into the creamy beans oh my god do not neglect the bread dunking bread dunking is THE POINT.

Congratulations! You are now enjoying The Beans!

---

Doubled version of this recipe under the cut for my own benefit, so I can glance at it without having to remember to double everything:

THE BEANS DOUBLE DASH:

Ingredience:

olive oil

2 onions, peeled + sliced

3 cans of cannellini beans

1 can of chickpeas

2 cans of full-fat coconut milk

4 tbsp white miso paste

salt + pepper

200g (7oz) baby spinach

a whole bunch (double handful?) of fresh dill or parsley (I usually use parsley; The Beans are still delicious even with dried herbs, but use less)

1 lemon, juice only

some tasty fresh fuckin BREAD

Steps:

Drizzle a splash of olive oil in a large pan or pot on a low-medium heat. Next add the onion and cook for 6-8 minutes or until the onion turns translucent (you don’t want to brown the onion).

Add the beans - including all the juices from the tins - into the pan. Then turn the heat up and cook for 7-10 minutes or until some of the liquid has reduced. While you're waiting, here's some prep you can do in anticipation of later steps: A. Put the miso paste into a small bowl and ladle a bit of the hot liquid in. Stir it around to dissolve. (This saves you from intractable undissolved miso clumps in the final product later) B. Chop the herbs if you got herbs that need to be chopped

Pour in the coconut milk. (You can reserve a few dollops of the cream for topping later if you want to be fancy, but I never bother).

Stir in the miso paste (dissolve it first if you haven't already!) and a generous pinch of pepper, then cook for a minute. Go a bit longer if the broth seems too runny, but it's probably fine.

Stir in the spinach and cook for another minute until it has wilted.

Chop most of the dill/parsley if you didn't already (save a few leaves for topping later if you want to be fancy) then add the chopped dill into the pan along with the lemon juice.

Give everything a good stir, then taste the sauce and season with salt and more pepper, if necessary.

Remove the pan from the heat (and if you chose the Fancy Life, top with the remaining dill leaves, a splash of olive oil, freshly ground black pepper and dollops of the remaining coconut cream.)

Serve with toasted bread for dunking into the creamy beans oh my god do not neglect the bread dunking bread dunking is THE POINT.

Congratulations!! You are now enjoying The Beans but twice as much!!

[phaseoluslunatic]

my focaccia art inspired by @softwaring 🤍

[phaseoluslunatic]

I think about this cake every day

[phaseoluslunatic]

[phaseoluslunatic]

How a beanstalk finds support.

[phaseoluslunatic]

hey is it okay if i eat my nature valley oats and honey granola bar here. yeah its the kind that comes as a two pack and immediately disintegrates into millions of annoying crumbs. its okay my ants that follow me everywhere will eat them. youll have ants now though.

[phaseoluslunatic]

life becomes so beautiful when you start cooking rice in liquids other than water

[phaseoluslunatic]

Artwork/interiors from a pretzel making one-sheet zine I drew and printed last year for friends and for fun!