phanomeheart

[phanomeheart]

Starting a conspiracy theory that Hank Green was the celebrity who asked Dan and Phil for a threesome

[phanomeheart]

talking about phannie history and we havent even mentioned dans overly earnest semi-erotic horror vampire fiction about him and his confirned bachelor roommate that got published in a bestselling book marketed to 12-15 year olds

for sure up there with the funniest shit he's ever done because genuinely what the fuck. the way-too-accurate fanfic prose, the overwhelmingly earnest parts about his and phil's friendship, the ridiculous eroticism of that entire tree bit, the AMOUNT of time they spend with their noses touching... honestly he should have just gone all the way and written them as lovers because truly what is this girl

-- Phil grabbed Dan’s wrists and pinned him against the tree

oh i bet

-- (…) Phil, who, as if in slow motion, leant backwards, smacked the branch from Dan’s hand and grabbed him by the throat

of course he did

-- He tried to move but the force his friend was applying to his neck seemed immovable and impossible 

uh-huh

-- Phil stepped closer until their noses touched and looked Dan directly in the eyes: ‘I could kill you. Every fibre of my being is urging me to tilt your head back and bite your neck, but I can choose not to.’

okay. so cool dan

-- Phil moved in closer, pinning Dan’s body against the tree-

WE GET IT. actually. jesus christ.

..but then there's the :( you know :(

-- The next day was to be Phil’s funeral. Dan had no interest in going. His friendship with Phil was personal to him and not something he wanted to share with family and friends who would mean well but insult with every word of comfort. He decided that even if he had to attend physically, he would be somewhere else in his mind. He had to.

worst shit i've ever had to read.

[phanomeheart]

I love when you find an author who just has a good flavor to their writing. It could be the way they handle characters, the way they use certain tropes or themes, even the specific lilt of their words. Its familiar and comforting and carries across different stories, like coming back to a place of comfort and recognizing the furniture.

[phanomeheart]

always nice to have something to rely on

[phanomeheart]

pov: the worst couple at the party proposition you for a threesome

[phanomeheart]

RETURN OF THE KING

[phanomeheart]

the priest from fleabag looks different here

[phanomeheart]

waahhhhhh

no but i love hank!!! the way he and john both have been so supportive of this community since the beginning and have never belittled the passion (insanity) of the phandom. the fact that they've seen dnp grow up to stay grounded and humble despite the success and have always had lovely things to say about them. idk it's just so nice (especially since so many of us are also big fans of h&j) idk it's just so refreshing to see someone have kind things to say about this community without making us the butt of a joke

[phanomeheart]

Inspired by a reddit post I saw lol. Any tab open on the ao3 website counts, not just fics

[phanomeheart]

Just saw genuinely one of the silliest takes of all time

They said that you can tell when books are based off of fanfiction because they will be third person pov

In what fuckin universe could that be true

[phanomeheart]

thinking about that scene from seeing red and how it’s the worst thing you could do to a ship. like the literal worst thing. worse than one half of the ship dying. the one thing you can’t come back from. also arguably the worst thing you could do to a beloved character. that’s partly why decades later people are still angry about it, still feel betrayed. i think it’s a testament to how good a ship spuffy is, and how good a character spike is, that the love for them has prevailed, that it could survive this.

[phanomeheart]

is it good? i could not answer that question with a gun to my head. does it make my brain vibrate like a hitachi magic wand at max power? UNFORTUNATELY FOR EVERYONE, YES

[phanomeheart]

has anyone posted this yet. best tweet ever written

[phanomeheart]

put your number (0-20) in the tags!!!!!! i think i got 14!!

anyone who comments that finding ways to enjoy the brief time we have on this bitch of an earth is cringey will be blocked ^_^ <3

[phanomeheart]

New favourite

[phanomeheart]

i blog for like 5 people and 3 of them are me

[phanomeheart]