peaofme

[peaofme]

Shine the Light

Even in our darkest moments, there is always a spark, a flicker of light. It may feel dim or far away, but it never truly fades. No matter the circumstances, it continues to shine. With time, the broken spaces within us find their own kind of healing, like seals placed over wounds. Today, I realized just how much the way we start our day can shape it. Mindset is everything—focus on the negative,…

[peaofme]

The Heart’s Longing: Embracing Desire with Purpose.

My heart is awake, stirring in ways it never has before. This season, after so much waiting, is filled with a craving for something more — something lasting, something real. I know all things come in God’s timing, and I’ve trusted in that. But now, there’s a new spark within me, a gentle but insistent whisper reminding me that there is something worth longing for, something worth the…

[peaofme]

Shadows..

Life after divorce is like stepping into a world filled with shadows—illusions and deceptions cast by a broken past and unmet hopes. It’s easy to get lost here, where reality blurs, and the ache for love feels like an endless tease, something you can almost touch but that slips away the moment you try to grasp it. The shadowed places bring a longing, an ache, as if love itself is playing tricks,…

[peaofme]

Change..

Change is uncomfortable—until you’re tired of being tired. I’ve made every excuse not to prioritize the gym, knowing deep down it’s something I need. I look at myself in the mirror or in photos and feel disconnected, wishing I had the same drive as those who proudly honor their bodies. Instead of committing, I’ve convinced myself to stay stuck, holding onto reasons that only keep me from the life…

[peaofme]

Why Me?

“Why me?” It’s a question that so many shy away from, often silenced by the reply, “Why not you?” But sometimes, the question still lingers—pressing, aching, refusing to be dismissed with simple answers. When life feels relentless, like each moment threatens to shatter you, it’s only natural to look up and ask, Why me? In Prayer This isn’t ingratitude; it’s a genuine yearning to understand. To…

[peaofme]

Is Love Indescribable?

Here we go again. Unfinished business? Or was there ever any to begin with? Yes, my heart races at the thought of you. I find myself searching for you—on social media, in a text that never comes, in the quiet hope of hearing your voice. You feel distant, yet so close, and it’s confusing. Your words sound one way, but your actions… they don’t match. Are you simply a tease in my life, a whisper…

[peaofme]

What is Your Truth?

What is Your Truth?

Standing in front of the mirror, you trace the changes your body has endured—each line, each scar, each shift. You look into your own eyes and ask yourself: What is your truth? Are you at peace with what you see, or is there a sense of disconnection? Do you feel whole, or is there a part of you that remains unseen, even to yourself? What makes you feel? Is there joy? Or is happiness something…

[peaofme]

It’s Time to Let Go

Nicholas, there comes a time when we all must face the truth. You don’t have a real relationship with Cameron, and maybe it’s time to stop pretending like you do. I know it’s hard to hear, but it’s harder to live through it, to see you trying to act like you’re the father and grandfather you never truly were. You call me, not to reconnect with me, but because you need me to be the bridge between…

[peaofme]

Because This Is What I Want…

No longer am I searching for satisfaction outside of myself. I’ve always been a homebody, content with my own space, and maybe that’s why I haven’t found the kind of solid relationships others have. Or perhaps I’ve been protecting myself from the pain the world can bring. Growing up, I lost myself in the pages of books—R.L. Stine, Walter Mosley, Zane. Their worlds were full of wonder, places…

[peaofme]

Enduring Hardship: Healing the Broken Pieces of My Heart

“Endure hardship…” The words from today’s sermon echoed deep within me, stirring up emotions I’ve been trying to bury. But what do you do when enduring feels like breaking, when you feel empty and alone? How do you pick up the pieces of a life that seems shattered while watching the person who caused your pain move forward—seemingly supported, leaning on someone new? They move on, while you’re…

[peaofme]

What Am I Really Missing?

KP…Four years… Four years that, on the surface, feel wasted. Time spent hoping, wishing, waiting for something to emerge that never did. But here I am, still feeling the tug of something. What is it that I’m missing? Why does this strange ache remain for a man who gave nothing meaningful, no real substance to my life? Maybe it’s not even about you. Maybe it’s about the part of me that…

[peaofme]

Breaking Free: Healing Through Anger and Betrayal

Anger—it’s a natural response when the life you thought you had crumbles around you. When the betrayal cuts deep, and it feels like the world has flipped upside down, it’s easy to wonder why. You ask yourself, “How did this happen? Why did he choose her? Could it have been avoided if only we had talked?” The hard truth is, sometimes we don’t get the conversations we need. We don’t get the…

[peaofme]

Why Am I Sad?

Why am I sad by this ending? What has he truly done to make me feel like I would be missing out on something? Four years—four years of time, energy, and emotions—and truly, nothing has come of it. We never went on a date, never really talked on the phone, shared pictures (nudes at that), frustration, and anger. The list could go on. So why does this feel like a loss? Sometimes, we grieve what…

[peaofme]

Who is Taking Care of You?

How do you love yourself when the vessel you’re trying to pull from is empty? I find myself asking this question more often than not, especially when life feels heavy. Self-love is supposed to be the well we draw from, the place we go to when we need to restore, to heal. But what happens when that well runs dry? We pour and pour into others—our children, friends, family, even strangers—but in…

[peaofme]

Is Healing Holding You Back From Fully Living?

Have you ever wondered if your healing journey has quietly become something else—a mask, perhaps? Initially, healing is about growth, self-awareness, and releasing old wounds, but sometimes it can turn into a shield. Maybe, without even realizing it, you’ve used healing as a way to protect yourself from fully re-engaging with life. At what point do we shift from healing to living again? Healing…

[peaofme]

Single, Celibate & Over 40 🥴

Picture a tumbleweed rolling by as you stand there, shielding your eyes from the blazing sun, searching for any sign of an oasis. You scan the horizon, but all you see is miles of desert—barren, dry, with the occasional cactus as your only companion. This, my friends, is the journey of celibacy after 40.  It all started with the best intentions: reclaiming your power, rediscovering yourself, and…

[peaofme]

Single & Unhappily Celibate after 40

Being single and celibate after 40 can feel like an uphill emotional battle. This candid piece delves into the frustration, loneliness, and societal pressures that come with later-life dating and intimacy. It offers a raw reflection on the struggles of unfulfilled desires, while questioning societal norms and advocating for personal empowerment and fulfillment. If you’ve ever felt torn between…