pajamapantsguy

[pajamapantsguy]

“At least you made it this far.”

me:

[pajamapantsguy]

nothing much, just trying to figure out other ways to hurt myself that dont involve cutting

[pajamapantsguy]

need to get new knives

maybe this knife isnt as sharp as i thought it was

[pajamapantsguy]

maybe this knife isnt as sharp as i thought it was

[pajamapantsguy]

I am slowly reaching MY LIMIT

I am actively thinking of cutting myself and there is NO ONE THAT CAN STOP ME

[pajamapantsguy]

i want to do it

i want to do it so fucking badly

i stg i am this close to doing it

there is no one that can stop me

[pajamapantsguy]

anyone done a self harm and though, “hey this actually works in relieving tension”

thanks self harm

[pajamapantsguy]

once again wondering if people would care if I disappeared

and I once again feel at peace for leaving knowing that no one cares

[pajamapantsguy]

i think im actually going to do it

i have a date in mind and a plan in place

now all i have to do is wait

[pajamapantsguy]

I’m getting VERY close to cutting myself

[pajamapantsguy]

Last semester, I wanted to just stay outside in the frigid cold. Let the cold take me away. If I stayed outside and no one came to get me, then I can finally go away

[pajamapantsguy]

me and my AI writing fucking bangers 😎

[pajamapantsguy]

MY NAILLESS TOE IS TWITCHING

[pajamapantsguy]

Funny. I want to be alone, but I hate the feeling of being alone with my thoughts

[pajamapantsguy]

Protip: DO NOT APPLY RUBBING ALCOHOL TO A NAKED NAILBED, THAT SHIT FUCKING HURTS

[pajamapantsguy]

Why must half of me think of something and the other half think of the exact opposite, and still come to the same conclusion?

So, I’ve been thinking a lot about purpose, and most of the time, I think I have no purpose in life. But more recently, I’ve been thinking about my purpose within people’s lives. Like, I’m a well known acquaintance in the friend group, like I am a person that joins in with the group. And with my closer group of friends, I feel like I’m closely knit in that group. However, there is the question on if I’m needed in the group.

Like with two of my friends in the group, yeah sure they see me as one of their closest friends, but they also have each other, and I think they’re inseparable. And another friend who I used to hang out with, they’ve recently found people who they love and care for. And like, I’m happy for them, but it does feel like my purpose of being the one to talk to most of the time, has been accomplished and that I don’t need to do that anymore.

I still hang out with these people because they genuinely make me happy and well, enjoy life. But, if I was gone, I don’t think much would change.

I feel at peace knowing that my friends have others to lean on when I’m not there. It’s nice to know that I can leave without anyone feeling lonely like I did for the majority of my life

[pajamapantsguy]

Just got done with watching squid game with my friends. Despite the brain rot and the series getting memed to death, it’s a good show. It has great themes such as inequality, friendship/betrayals, and family, just to name a few. I have like three more episodes of season one and the entirety of season two left to go. We’ll probably have like 2-3 sessions left, after that, no idea on what else we could do. I have been thinking a lot while watching and as there’s a lot of death, yeah not good. I’ll talk about it in another post